Feedback on letter to teacher please?

[KidsHappen]

Is this too over the top or does it politely but firmly convey my message? TIA.

 

 

 

Dear Ms. ________,

 

I am writing in regards to the instruction concerning proper nutritional choices that you provided K______ on Friday. While I do appreciate your concern, it is really not necessary. K_______ is well within the normal height and weight range for her age and has a BMI of 19. We have an excellent doctor who counsels us on these matters. We are trying to encourage K_______ to have a healthy relationship with food so that she does not develop eating or body dysmorphic disorders as so many young women do today. We believe that this includes learning to eat snacks in moderation. For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation.

 

I would ask that in the future if your have questions or concerns that fall within the realm of parental authority, you please address them to me. I can assure you that I am quite qualified and experienced in these matters. I have a degree in Interdisciplinary Social Sciences with an emphasis in child and family studies. I also have six children ages 10 to 26 plus one grandchild and I have home schooled for 14 years.

 

Now areas where K______ could use a little extra instruction are standing in line, raising her hand to speak and asking permission to go to the restroom as we have never really had a need to cover these at home. She could probably also use a little extra helping dealing with the children that make fun of her because she is not accustomed to doing these things. You help in these matters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much.

 

Sincerely,

[johnandtinagilbert]

:lol: Oh, no. I fear the latter portion may come across as snarky after mentioning the home schooling part. :lol:

 

I like the early part....:lol:

[HollyinNNV]

If you were my spouse, I'd suggest that you edit the letter as follows:

 

 

 

Dear Ms. ________,

 

I am writing in regards to the instruction concerning proper nutritional choices that you provided K______ on Friday. While I do appreciate your concern, it is really not necessary. K_______ is well within the normal height and weight range for her age and has a BMI of 19. We have an excellent doctor who counsels us on these matters. We are trying to encourage K_______ to have a healthy relationship with food so that she does not develop eating or body dysmorphic disorders as so many young women do today. We believe that this includes learning to eat snacks in moderation. I would ask that in the future if your have questions or concerns that fall within the realm of parental authority, you please address them to me. I can assure you that I am quite qualified and experienced in these matters. Thanks so much.

 

Sincerely,

 

I like a lot of what you said. However, you cloud the issue with too much bulk. I like that you mention you have a doctor that will counsel you on health. I also like that you mentioned that she crossed a parental boundary. I think those are key and the rest is ancillary.

I'd CC it to the principal.

Holly

[Scarlett]

I must have missed an entire thread.....not sure why you are even sending such a letter..:confused:

[elegantlion]

Okay I've just been reading the other thread you started so I really like this letter. The only portion I might remove would be the part about your dd's height, weight, and BMI. Really that's none of their business.

 

I just read the portion about the candy bar to my dh and he found that practice absurd.

 

I assume you are ready to deal with a rebuttal. :D

[kaylk in tx]

i couldn't find the original thread where you explained the candy bar incident but i seem to remember you described it as a "snack". does her class have a snack time during the day? could she have pulled it out then instead of in the lunch room as her dessert? i know when i was teaching we had a short snack time built into our morning since we had one of the later lunch times and i always specified healthy snacks for that. a dessert at lunch i wouldn't have cared about and indeed would not have known about as i had my 30 minutes of freedom to bolt down my own food. just wondering if this was just a misunderstanding about when it was appropriate to eat the candy bar.

[Tree House Academy]

I love the letter - cracks me up and something I would have definitely written myself; however, the teacher is likely NOT the culprit here. It is probably "school policy" and for that, you will probably have to talk to the principal and maybe even the superintendent.

 

At my oldest son's public school, they weren't allowed to bring candybars or have them at all. Even party food had to be approved. It was definitely county wide and maybe state wide as far as policy. I hate to say it, but you likely just won't be able to send the candy bars. *This* is a good part of why I detest ps..well, that and SO MANY OTHER THINGS! LOL

[BigMamaBird]

Sounds good to me.

[elegantlion]

Here's the link to the original thread for those interested.

 

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=121566

[Scarlett]

Is this too over the top or does it politely but firmly convey my message? TIA.

 

 

 

Dear Ms. ________,

 

I am writing in regards to the instruction concerning proper nutritional choices that you provided K______ on Friday. While I do appreciate your concern, it is really not necessary. K_______ is well within the normal height and weight range for her age and has a BMI of 19. We have an excellent doctor who counsels us on these matters. We are trying to encourage K_______ to have a healthy relationship with food so that she does not develop eating or body dysmorphic disorders as so many young women do today. We believe that this includes learning to eat snacks in moderation. For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation.

 

I would ask that in the future if your have questions or concerns that fall within the realm of parental authority, you please address them to me. I can assure you that I am quite qualified and experienced in these matters. I have a degree in Interdisciplinary Social Sciences with an emphasis in child and family studies. I also have six children ages 10 to 26 plus one grandchild and I have home schooled for 14 years.

 

Now areas where K______ could use a little extra instruction are standing in line, raising her hand to speak and asking permission to go to the restroom as we have never really had a need to cover these at home. She could probably also use a little extra helping dealing with the children that make fun of her because she is not accustomed to doing these things. You help in these matters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much.

 

Sincerely,

 

Oh my. I just found the thread. I'd be ticked too. Did they allow her to eat the candy bar?

[Chris in VA]

It seems a little snarky, but I totally understand your intention! I don't think you should include the line about the chocolate for the teacher (although any teacher in her right mind would want the chocolate itself--it just seems a little snarky!).

 

After sending my dd to school last year, I guess I'm more aware of the things the school takes on as their business--like informing parents of good food choices (and strangely, the concept of all things in moderation doesn't come up...). Dd often came home with "adamant views" that were obviously taught to her there (rabid recycling, for example)--I think teachers have a lot of authority, and when every adult in your little school-y day is saying the same thing, why wouldn't you believe them? After all, you have grown up trusting your own parents and aren't used to the idea that some adults' views may be "over the top" or something.

 

Your letter sounds a touch adversarial to me, but ymmv. I know you are annoyed, and I think you have a right to be.

[Night Elf]

Was the policy written by the teacher or provided by the school? If the school will not allow kids to have unhealthy snacks, the teacher will not be able to do anything about the policy. If the policy is the teacher's own, I would send a copy to the principal as well and clearly state in the letter that it is being directed to both parties.

 

Personally, if it was a school policy, I would print off the school menu and highlight all the foods that are not considered healthy and ask why those foods are being provided by the school but parents aren't allow to send them in lunches or snacks. I think it is a perfectly reasonable request. Of course the teacher and principal might agree with you and tell you that the policy was created by the school board. You'll likely need to determine just high up in the school hierarchy you want to take this concern.

[Scarlett]

 

Dear Ms. ________,

 

I am writing in regards to the instruction concerning proper nutritional choices that you provided K______ on Friday. While I do appreciate your concern, it is really not necessary. K_______ is well within the normal height and weight range for her age and has a BMI of 19. We have an excellent doctor who counsels us on these matters. We are trying to encourage K_______ to have a healthy relationship with food so that she does not develop eating or body dysmorphic disorders as so many young women do today. We believe that this includes learning to eat snacks in moderation. For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation.

 

I would ask that in the future if your have questions or concerns that fall within the realm of parental authority, you please address them to me. I can assure you that I am quite qualified and experienced in these matters. I have a degree in Interdisciplinary Social Sciences with an emphasis in child and family studies. I also have six children ages 10 to 26 plus one grandchild and I have home schooled for 14 years.

 

Now areas where K______ could use a little extra instruction are standing in line, raising her hand to speak and asking permission to go to the restroom as we have never really had a need to cover these at home. She could probably also use a little extra helping dealing with the children that make fun of her because she is not accustomed to doing these things. You help in these matters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much.

 

Sincerely,

cc: principal

 

The portion in red is what I would say. The rest, although funny, makes you sound snarky and or full of yourself...:) Which I know you aren't.

 

The public schools really do think they own our children don't they?

[KidsHappen]

Thanks guys. Yeah, I was feeling a little snarky went I wrote the letter and I will edit it along the lines of Holly's suggestion. :)

 

I just double checked the school policy handbook and it says that healthy snacks are encouraged. The only thing specifically prohibited are carbonated drinks and peanut products.

[Nakia]

While I thoroughly enjoyed the letter, I agree with Holly about editing.

 

If you do send in the original, it might make for a really long year. :001_rolleyes:

[KidsHappen]

The portion in red is what I would say. The rest, although funny, makes you sound snarky and or full of yourself...:) Which I know you aren't.

 

The public schools really do think they own our children don't they?

 

Unfortunately, I can be a bit full of myself sometimes, :blushing: but I try to contain myself. :)

[Tammy]

It sounds as if 'only healthy snacks are allowed' is a GREAT policy. I am sure they have good reasons for such a policy....wouldn't you think?

 

Along with all the other 'rules'.....that one seems very minor....and why you are all upset is puzzling to me.

 

I wouldn't get the teacher all into your 'business'.....if you know what I mean.

[MomLovesClassics]

It is nice to see you take this action. Please let us know how it turns out. No parent should have to fight this sort of battle.

[Guest sarathan]

I don't think it sounds snarky at all!..... okay, maybe just a *teensy weensy bit*. :) I like it the way it is. :)

[camibami]

I love the letter, but I agree it probably isn't a great idea to send it. Why not just go in at the end of the day and discuss it with the teacher? Letters seem so formal. If you are there face-to-face, she can read your "tone" better. (Though that may not always be a good thing, LOL!)

 

We had a lot of this type of stuff when my oldest went to PS for 2nd grade. I always just went in and talked to the teacher either before or after school for a minute. Only one "serious" issue did actually make an appointment and get a set time to speak with a teacher (another teacher, not her home room teacher) and write a note. Seemed to work out better for us- little things taken care of quickly or explained in short conversations in a non-adversarial way, big things with formal notes and appointments.

[Audrey]

Don't edit it! If anything has too little snark. I think truly stupid people deserve to be cut down to size with a hefty dose of crushing snark when the occassion warrants it. But, I can be a very mean old .... witch that way. ;)

[Garga]

No no no.

 

Have you spoken, in person, face to face to the teacher yet? Not just the initial episode where she said that candy wasn't allowed. I mean, have you told her in person exactly what you said in the letter? At a separate time from her initially telling you about the candy?

 

If you haven't told her vocally what you wrote, then you need to. And actually, you shouldn't begin this 2nd conversation by telling, you start by asking exactly why the candy was taken away. You must be sure you have all the facts before blazing in there with that letter.

 

Facts to find out:

Teacher policy? School policy?

What exactly happened? (like another poster said, was the candy pulled out at a time when it shouldn't have been, during snack instead of dessert?)

 

If the teacher was acting on her own, then face-to-face ask her to stop. If the teacher was acting out school policy, and you want it changed, go to the proper person with the power to change it.

 

If the teacher was acting on her own policy, and you've already had a face to face interaction, then go above her head and forget the letter to the teacher.

 

If I were a teacher and received that letter, it would make my heart start to pound and I'd turn red in the face, and I'm a very calm person. It's a combative letter and not very nice at all.

 

Frankly, I think other posters are telling you to send it because it's you and not them. In real life, that letter is just combative and disrespectful. And sending in articles to educate the teacher about nutrition--that's totally overstepping the bounds of common courtesy.

 

Truthfully, the kids are in school. There are rules in the school. The teacher had to enforce the rules. If you don't like the rules, find the person with the power to change them and start there--face-to-face before the letter writing begins.

[Pamela H in Texas]

Is there a written policy about lunches? If not, then nothing should have been said. If there was something the teacher felt necessary to address, it should have been to you, not the child. If you felt THAT was necessary to address, the note could be edited the way Scarlet said, but I'd prefer to speak to her in person (with snark, of course).

 

However, regardless, you chose to send her to school so if that is the rule, such is life. I have a pretty detailed lunch policy (you can see my website). Its actually much less so than many schools do. Though I think it's fine for kids to have an occassional candy bar, kids can have them at home. It's just easier to say no candy bars, cake, etc. I'd rather decide "none" than whether I want to deal with a kid that ate a king-sized butterfinger or a 6 by 6 piece of cake on an individual basis. They can eat whatever the family decides at home. I'm not having kids watch any tv while they are at my school either though I think it's perfectly fine for kids to watch tv, ya know?

 

I'd skip the letter altogether. You chose to send her to school; you deal with the school and/or teacher's rules. If you don't like them, address them appropriately through the proper channels or keep your kids home.

Edited August 17, 2009 by 2J5M9K

[EKS]

I have to say that I really enjoyed reading this, but I think that if you give it to the teacher you will likely not be doing your daughter any favors.

[Loupelou]

Last time I checked parents still had rights in the United States. I think we've really finally reached the death of common sense in this country.

 

I'm with the OP as far as sending a well worded but not snarky letter, along the lines of Holly's suggestion. I don't agree with those who are saying that because she sent her child to school means she shouldn't have a say in these things. She needs to let the teacher know that she's a parent who wants to be involved, and who will not be walked all over. Also, I believe the OP stated that there was nothing in the school policy that forbade candy bars.

[FO4UR]

I would ask the teacher if this was her policy or school policy before I sent that letter. "Don't shoot the messenger" kind of thinking....

 

I'm betting it's school policy, and she probably doesn't enjoy taking candy from babies in the lunchroom.

 

IDK -if this is a battle worth fighting, you will likely have to go for a head with more power....and I wouldn't want a teacher (who is merely following protocol trying to keep her job) to get caught in the cross fire.

 

jmho

 

 

.....thinking if schools were about the student, parent and teacher life would be much simpler.....gotta love complete strangers telling you what your kids can and cannot eat!:glare:

[Mrs Mungo]

I would ask the teacher if this was her policy or school policy before I sent that letter. "Don't shoot the messenger" kind of thinking....

 

I'm betting it's school policy, and she probably doesn't enjoy taking candy from babies in the lunchroom.

 

IDK -if this is a battle worth fighting, you will likely have to go for a head with more power....and I wouldn't want a teacher (who is merely following protocol trying to keep her job) to get caught in the cross fire.

 

jmho

 

 

.....thinking if schools were about the student, parent and teacher life would be much simpler.....gotta love complete strangers telling you what your kids can and cannot eat!:glare:

 

I agree with this. If it's school policy then it's not the teacher you should be addressing.

[johnandtinagilbert]

I suggest writing, not a vocal anything. You always want a paper trail in the system. Always.

[5kidsforME]

Don't edit it! If anything has too little snark. I think truly stupid people deserve to be cut down to size with a hefty dose of crushing snark when the occassion warrants it. But, I can be a very mean old .... witch that way. ;)

 

 

The only problem is the teacher may take it out on the child.

[JudyJudyJudy]

While I thoroughly enjoyed the letter, I agree with Holly about editing.

 

If you do send in the original, it might make for a really long year. :001_rolleyes:

Or, worst yet, a really long school career. This is the type of letter that will get passed around from teacher to teacher. Unfortunately, not only will the parent who sent the letter be remembered by all the teachers in the school, but also the child of the parent will be remembered—and not in a good way.

 

 

For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation.

Actually if what you sent was a typical commercial candy bar, the chocolate in it probably had few, if any, health benefits. Most chocolate in candy bars is processed with alkali, which greatly reduces the flavanol antioxidants that are responsible for the health benefits of chocolate.

[Danestress]

Honestly, it sounds like my former 17 year old writing to me. "Geez Mom, you think I can't make my own decision? I'd like to inform you that I know what I am doing. GOSH."

 

Lol. You are much bigger than this. And you are going to have other issues that are much more worth pitching a fit over. With most things that I didn't like in school, I would shrug my shoulders and say to my child, "Her classroom, her rules" even if they were really dumb rules. And I was happy to acknowledge for my child when I thought it was a dumb rule but unless it was something really important, she was making the rules in that class, not me.

 

But I personally believe in cultivating an attitude that teachers are honored and revered and deferred to even when they are being silly. When it's something worth really fighting over, then you have a history of being cooperate and pro teacher and the teacher will be more disposed to hear you out.

 

It's not going to kill your child not to have this candy bar or one like it. Send her a "healthy snack." Send me the chocolate:) Joke about how much fun it is for you to get the have the role of "bad Mom.

 

I had pretty much this same situation once. I sent my son to Montessori school with a chocolate pudding. This was a high quality organic chocolate pudding - NOT that I am above eating the junkier kind. She sent it back saying they only allowed healthy treats in lunches. When I picked my child up the next day, I made a joke about it and she clarified that chocolate pudding is bad, but that vanilla would have been okay. SO weird. But whatever. I was glad later that I didn't ruffle feathers, because she became a wonderful teacher to my sons, loving, generous, warm, and a great model to me of how I could parent better. I absolutely loved her, and was willing to live with her lunch box mandates.

Edited August 17, 2009 by Danestress

[Cindyg]

If the SCHOOL doesn't allow candy, there's no point in saying or writing anything.

 

Your first question has to be -- whose rule is this? Then address it at that level. If there is an actual no-candy rule, they are not likely to modify it to allow candy "two ounces or less." If it's an actual rule, you are going to have to deal with (and live within) that rule. (Give your daughter the tiny bit of candy on the way home!)

 

And, frankly, if they have a no-candy policy, count your lucky stars that other moms won't be sending boatloads of candy for the whole class every day. That's what we encountered during our brief time at preschool. My son came home with handfuls of candy frequently (from other parents). They didn't let the kids eat it at school. No, they sent it home so the parents could be the bad guys. Sigh.

 

Anyway, your previous thread horrified me. I'm so sorry for you and every other parent in your shoes!

Edited August 17, 2009 by Cindyg

[SwimmyKids]

I imagine most schools don't allow candy except at class parties. For obvious reasons, it seems. I would not send the letter. Snarky is accurate.

[MBM]

Or, worst yet, a really long school career. This is the type of letter that will get passed around from teacher to teacher. Unfortunately, not only will the parent who sent the letter be remembered by all the teachers in the school, but also the child of the parent will be remembered—and not in a good way.

 

I agree wholeheartedly. The teachers' lounge is a haven for gossip. Your letter might very well be passed around. Also, like other posters have mentioned, I'd worry about a teacher taking it out on your daughter.

 

Good luck. We're afterschoolers, and this sort of pettiness in schools drives me crazy, too.

[Orthodox6]

[interpolations, below] I'm probably too late to respond, but these are my thoughts. . .

 

 

Is this too over the top or does it politely but firmly convey my message? TIA.

 

 

 

Dear Ms. ________,

 

I am writing in regards to the instruction concerning proper nutritional choices that you provided K______ on Friday. While I do appreciate your concern, it is really not necessary. K_______ is well within the normal height and weight range for her age and has a BMI of 19. We have an excellent doctor who counsels us on these matters. We are trying to encourage K_______ to have a healthy relationship with food so that she does not develop eating or body dysmorphic disorders as so many young women do today. We believe that this includes learning to eat snacks in moderation.

 

[OMIT] For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation. [omit because is a digression, and because "chocolate" is a "trigger word" for bad reaction from teacher]

 

[OMIT] I would ask that [omit because the remainder of the sentence suffices]

 

in the future if your have questions or concerns that fall within the realm of parental authority, [OMIT this word you] please address them to me.

 

[OMIT] I can assure you that I am quite qualified and experienced in these matters. I have a degree in Interdisciplinary Social Sciences with an emphasis in child and family studies. I also have six children ages 10 to 26 plus one grandchild and I have home schooled for 14 years. [omit this entire portion because of danger of sounding like "one upsmanship" -- ("I know more than you do.") -- which could turn into table tennis.] [Also, your annoyance shows clearly, and you are trying to persuade the teacher, rather than lambast her -- at least, for purposes of accomplishing your goal, you are trying to persuade her ! ]

 

[OMIT WORD] Now [Very subtle, but starting with the word "Now" sounds chastizing.]

 

areas where K______ could use a little extra instruction are standing in line, raising her hand to speak and asking permission to go to the restroom as we have never really had a need to cover these at home. She could probably also use a little extra helping dealing with the children that make fun of her because she is not accustomed to doing these things. You help in these matters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much. [Change last sentence to "Thanks so much !" because the exclamation point conveys a friendlier tone.]

 

Sincerely,

[justamouse]

You help in these matters would be greatly appreciated. Thanks so much.

 

Sincerely,

 

I believe you want the YOU to be YOUR?

 

And I love it.

[mommy2be]

Haha! It was good!

 

I might change it a little - to make it a little less snarky... but still get your point accross.

 

To those who say to have a verbal - I disagree. Paper is always better. Also, the whole issue started with a note from the teacher I believe.

 

If it was just the teacher who decided to take it upon herself to choese what your daughter should and should not eat - then yes. She needs to be aware that you are completely capable of making those decisions, as her parent. The teacher is for teaching...

 

I would probably take out the part about chocolate... haha. I would probably emphasis that (although it's not her business) you provide healthy meals for your daughter on a regular basis. I did really like the part about making sure she does not develop food issues... So true with young girls these days. The teacher is sending a message that "chocolate is bad" and it's not - in moderation!

 

Anyways, I'd like to know what you actually end up sending and how it plays out!

 

Good luck!

[msjones]

I don't have time to read the whole thread, but...

 

Chances are, the teacher is expected to send home those notes during the first week/s of school as a way to communicate school policy about snacks. She probably did not intend to criticize your supervision of your daughter's nutrition.

 

When I was teaching, those kinds of notes were mass-produced in the office by someone other than the teacher. They were one more annoying thing I had to remember to do during those first busy weeks of school.

 

I'd bet the teacher doesn't even remember which kids had those notes sent home and which ones didn't.

 

So, if I were you -- I'd be irked, but would save my energy for a different type of problem and wouldn't send the note.

[jujsky]

For your benefit I have included an article regarding the health benefits of chocolate along with a few small pieces that you may enjoy in moderation.

 

:lol: I love it!!!!!!

[Carol in Cal.]

I agree with you, but you have to pick your battles, I think. This is not the hill to die on. Ask your DD what the other kids have for snacks, and figure out something that meets your guidelines and theirs. Tell her she can have a candy bar when she gets home from school--it will be something to look forward to!

 

These things seem dumb, but there is usually a reason for them. My DD attended a kindergarten--2 long days and 3 half days per week. For the long days, the teacher told the kids to get one thing from their lunch boxes at snack time, and leave the rest for lunch. Why? Because if she didn't, some of the kids would eat all their food at snack time and get hungry later.

 

This was bad for DD because the snack would take the edge off her hunger, and she often didn't eat much lunch. Also, I had always given her well-balanced meals AND snacks, so she was not used to eating just one thing and got very constipated. Once I realized what the problem was, I hunted everywhere until I found a Tupperware container with two compartments that were sealed from each other. On one side I put cheese chunks, and on the other I put cut up or dried fruit. That was a good snack, met their guidelines, and worked out OK. I had to figure out the limits to figure out how to work within them.

 

It's easy to say that their rules are dumb, and they are, but it's better to fight over the truly harmful ones than to assert your rights every single time some little thing comes up. I understand the impulse, I truly so, but you don't want to bring the school down on your DD's head the first week that she is there or develop a reputation as 'difficult' yourself. Down the road you will want those good relationships with others for yourself and your DD's sake.

[BamaTanya]

Of course, I was a ps teacher for 9 years and a Cs teacher for 3. And a homeschooler for 6. Etc. Etc. The teacher is very likely enforcing a policy that she wishes she didn't have to deal with, too.

 

When I decide to send my dc to school (2 of whom are in ps as we speak), I do everything -- and I mean EVERYTHING -- in my power to make my dc's lives easier while they are there. I buy whatever uniform, binder, brand of crayon and glue, snack -- WHATEVER does not make my dc stand out as "THAT KID who was homeschooled." They have to deal with lines and crowds and busywork and homework and boredom. I don't want to make them deal with any animosity I've generated (blatant or not) by not supporting the teacher in every way I can.

 

My dc go to a school with the same policy. No sweets (candy, I thought) and no carbonated drinks, for instance. When I first sent a pudding for snack time, I got a note. I was a little miffed, but the next time I bought snacks for school, I picked up something that met the policy. It wasn't hard. I might have put crackers or dry cereal in a baggy. Can't remember now. It never became an issue.

 

I do not teach my dc blind compliance, but I'm not going to get them into the practice of challenging every thing we think is meaningless. It's pretty ridiculous that we have a stop sign in the middle of the road in our neighborhood, but I stop there.

 

If I were you, I would tell my precious little one, "OK, so it's ridiculous, but that's what the teacher (principal, bus driver, etc) expects while you're at school, so we'll have chocolate bars on the way home."

 

jmho