How weird are you willing to be?

[Pamela H in Texas]

I missed the DIY Funerals. I would be interested in a link, if you have one.

 

As for different, I am. And I'm fine with it. On the areas I've chosen, I've researched and chosen what was best, most logical, scriptural, etc. I have found groups in which I'm more normal though that isn't always possible, of course.

 

I don't know where homeschooling fits in. I first considered homeschooling when *I* was 14-ish. And then it actually seemed pretty "normal" when we made the decision as the people we spent the most time with did so. And we had what we thought were good reasons.

Edited July 26, 2009 by 2J5M9K

[skaterbabs]

According to my family I have always been "weird" so deciding to homeschool my children did not come as a complete shock. ....I have always walked my own path (with little dips into "normalcy").....

 

 

Ditto. I have always been the oddball in my family. HSing really wasn't a suprise to anyone, and when I was discussing it with my aunt (a public-school teacher in OR) even she agreed that it was probably the best thing for my kids, and for Dot in particular.

 

Dot BF until she was almost five. (While there is a small sub-culture of extended BF here, it's NOT common to see anyone BF past a year, and NIP is definitely frowned upon outside of the small LLL/AP circles.)

 

Members of my family cannot understand why I think NOT vaccinating is a good idea. (Except MIL, and she disagrees on not doing so when it comes to polio.)

 

In my family, I'm the only reader. Every so often my dad used to buy the biggest book he could find because when I ran out of reading material I'd start reading the encyclopedias and that was just too weird for him.

 

I attended a small private school in middle school that used the ACE curric. lock, stock and barrel. That certainly made for an...interesting... experience when transitioning to a small-town public high school. I had many friends who were HS'd, so while I fought doing so for my own kids for years, that wasn't a strange idea to me.

[SheWillFly]

Using the example from the OP we were weird before we were officially committed homeschoolers. I'm totally okay with being entirely off the mainstream path in so many ways.

[Mommyof4ks]

Glad to find some company! :D I actually started out being 'weird' when I started making dd's clothes (mainly dresses) when she was a toddler. People thought they were so cute, because they were different that what other people had. I too like things that I like and not what others say I should like.period. Homeschooling is our choice because I did not like what was not offered (science and history) in our elementary school until 4th grade. These are things dd enjoys, so it seemed normal to teach her these things rather than send her to ps where she would learn things she already knew.

 

You are not alone! :001_smile:

[K&Rs Mom]

The more we learn, the weirder we get. Now dh & I will frequently be having a conversation and stop suddenly to ask, "when did we become *those* people?" :lol: IMO, it's a good thing, but seems like it's snowballing - learning about one thing, and making a change based on that, leads us to many other paths we had not previously considered.

[JennifersLost]

I'm definitely willing to be weird.

 

I feel that family is the most important thing.

 

That siblings should be friends, not "rivals".

 

That children can be polite.

 

That kids can go through entire childhoods without owning designer anything.

 

That time is more important than money.

 

That women don't have to cut their hair just because they get married.

 

That no makeup is necessary (but it's not evil, either).

 

And on and on and on.....

[Jayne J]

I find it fascinating how many responders say that they were "weird" before they decided to hs. I guess that makes sense, but it was completely the other way around for me.

 

I actually accidentally came across TWTM in my library and checked it out thinking it might be something I could use to better my own education--I had no idea it was about homeschooling. As I read, I kept mentally nodding my head in agreement. To be honest, at the time, my unenlightened opinion was that only creepy Christian fundamentalist types homeschooled, and it was really more a method of brainwashing your kids to believe what you believed. (CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!! That is how well the ps work in dividing children from parents, when a graduate thinks training your own children in the way you believe is brainwashing, but the public schools are completely fair and unbiased!!) After reading TWTM I saw a different concept of homeschooling and promptly read everything I could about it. My oldest was 18 mos. old, and I absolutely knew that hs was what I wanted. That opened all sorts of other things up for questioning. I must say that reading the books, articles and posts of other hs'ers has been the education I never had, the one that made me realize that I did not need to listen to all the experts. (You had the power to return home all along Dorothy!!) So all my weirdness has flowed from JW and SWB and their trippy, counter-cultural manifesto--TWTM.:lol::lol:

[Garga]

So all my weirdness has flowed from JW and SWB and their trippy, counter-cultural manifesto--TWTM.:lol::lol:

 

Loved your post, but that line especially.

[Mommy22alyns]

To be honest, at the time, my unenlightened opinion was that only creepy Christian fundamentalist types homeschooled,

 

 

 

Shhh.... don't tell. That was my unenlightened opinion at first too. :001_huh: My first thought was "denim jumpers" and "Duggars" and while I love the Duggars I'm far from being one. Imagine my relief when I actually found it written on the internet that you DON'T have to wear a denim jumper to homeschool! (Because we all know that if it's written on the internet it MUST be true! ;))

[BillieBoy]

:ohmy: Gasp! What if weird becomes the new norm and I was considered mainstream? :scared:

[Jayne J]

Well, yeah, but really...mainstream homeschooler is still apparently well below the Normal person cut-off line.:D Never fear.

[justamouse]

 

So, in the wake of that long ramble, let me ask--what have you reconsidered or questioned, having dipped one toe into the world of weird when you started homeschooling? Or am I alone in my weirdness...

 

 

It think the homeschooling pokes the hole in the dam of weirdness. The first few years is a small spring, after about 7 years it's a raging river of weird.

 

Welcome. The water's fine. :tongue_smilie:

[mcconnellboys]

You're not weird. The world of lemmings is what's weird..... BE an individual.....

[mommydearest]

People do judge others for good or ill, based on first impressions. Our brains are wired to seek out similar...it's how we used to recognize part of our own tribe. Different was dangerous and those shadows are still with us in the reptilian part of our brains. I've made the decision for my family, to try to keep our clothes low-key and blend-in-able because I don't want outsiders making assumptions based on appearances. I prefer that people first see us as middle of the road, t-shirts and shorts garden-variety average. That way as our choices are slowly revealed, people are intrigued rather than intimidated or threatened. In that way I sort of see myself and my kids as ambassadors for homeschooling, homebirthing, babywearing, breastfeeding, good-food eating, no-cable having, education-obsession. People are often surprised at how a family that on the surface seems so much like their own has made such out-of-the-mainstream choices. They feel freer to ask questions and their minds are often opened to other possibilities for themselves and their own families.

 

Beautiful! This describes my family well....and I never realized it until now!

[elw_miller]

People do judge others for good or ill, based on first impressions. Our brains are wired to seek out similar...it's how we used to recognize part of our own tribe. Different was dangerous and those shadows are still with us in the reptilian part of our brains. I've made the decision for my family, to try to keep our clothes low-key and blend-in-able because I don't want outsiders making assumptions based on appearances. I prefer that people first see us as middle of the road, t-shirts and shorts garden-variety average. That way as our choices are slowly revealed, people are intrigued rather than intimidated or threatened. In that way I sort of see myself and my kids as ambassadors for homeschooling, homebirthing, babywearing, breastfeeding, good-food eating, no-cable having, education-obsession. People are often surprised at how a family that on the surface seems so much like their own has made such out-of-the-mainstream choices. They feel freer to ask questions and their minds are often opened to other possibilities for themselves and their own families.

 

Excellent answer!!

[cdrumm4448]

I actually make my own, but it's completely organic, natural and very simple. I boil soapnuts. That's it. Take 2-3 small handfuls of soapnuts and put them in a pot with 12 cups of water. Boil. Cool. Put in a container.

 

I use 1-2 ounces in my washing machine. I was making shampoo (after soapnut juice cools, add cornstarch to thicken. Boil again. Cool again. Put in bottle. Use just like regular shampoo).

 

You can use it to wash you, your car, anything in your house. I like naturoli soapnuts. I just bought over 5 lbs on ebay. That will last us 1-2 years.

 

We also have allergies in our house and that has helped considerably.

[WTMCassandra]

You're not weird. The world of lemmings is what's weird..... BE an individual.....

 

:lol::iagree:

[CalicoKat]

Just get yourself a T-shirt that says, "I'm weird. Get over it already."

:D good idea!

[kalanamak]

Having never been a member of a club or a political party or any organization, homeschooling is one of the most conformist things I've ever done. For once, however big and odd-shaped, there is a peg I am hung on.

[Moni]

It was homeschooling that did it to me.

I think I homeschooled because I already .....not needing to change from the things you mentioned

:seeya:

[sunflowerlady]

Yes, I am different and weird in all kinds of ways.:tongue_smilie: I qualify as a misfit in just about any group, I suppose.

 

You see, I am a Bible believing Christian and that is part of the reason we homeschool.

 

Yet, I don't follow the line most other Christian homeschoolers follow when it comes to politics.:001_huh: I don't always vote Republican and in fact, have been feeling more drawn back to my Southern Democrat roots. Why? Well, I just do not believe that either political party is the party of "Christian values". I think they both have some good and some bad points. In other words, they are made up of imperfect people. People like me. LOL

 

So I just keep my mouth shut at homeschool group functions. :001_smile:

 

The interesting thing is that now that I am closing in on turning 40 next year, I am so much more comfortable being the "me" I really am. I am very comfortable in my skin and making my own choices without feeling the need to conform or meet the standard that other people set.

 

I am not quiverfull- We have an only child.

 

I don't sew although I have a machine and would love to learn.

 

I don't bake my own bread.

 

We do vaccinate dd, although we will probably skip the Gardasil thing.

 

I bottle fed dd.

 

I enjoy being different.:lol:

[aggieamy]

You know, I used to be normal. Really I did. I was totally happy to be like everyone else. I could read "normal" woman's magazines and not cringe. Last night I was looking through my MIL's Woman's Day or Family Circle or something and couldn't relate at all.

 

My strangeness stared when I found Dave Ramsey and his debt free plan, then I started carrying canvas bags to the grocery store, soon afterwards we stopped eating things with HFCS or proccessed foods or caffiene, after that we turned off the TV and playing games as a family at night, and now we're talking about homeschooling. Suddenly my coworkers are looking at me strange. Who knows what odd things I'll be up to by this time next year!

 

Oh well, it's lots of fun marching to the beat of my own drummer.

[mama2cntrykids]

I've always been weird, lol. In high school, I always wondered why this certain girl could just come and pick up her German class work and leave--to go home. I couldn't understand it then, but now of course I realize it was something that *I* could have done too (with my mother's permission).

 

Then, when I married my now ex-husband, he brought up the idea of breastfeeding and homeschooling our children. I was admittedly grossed out by breastfeeding but went on to bf both boys for 1.5 years each and my dd for over 2 years. Homeschooling, I just thought was cool!

 

Along with these ideas I also cloth diapered all my dc off and on their whole babyhood's. Now, I really want chickens and a cow. I've been growing a good sized garden for two summers now and had my first time of canning last fall.

 

It's absolutely an adventure!! I love it. I look forward to the future and what else I can discover and learn in my "weirdness" :).

[5Youngs]

.

I am, to be blunt, becoming a weirdo.[/size]

 

:lol:

 

Welcome to the dark side~

(Evil laugh.......)

 

Thanks for the laugh.

I think that homeschooling your kids is the best education that a MOM could ever receive.;)

Seriously, it's made me take a long, hard look at almost everything that I assumed.............

[Geo]

How weird are you willing to be?

 

Never really thought about having a choice in it...teehee.

 

 

Geo

[MommyRyan]

I'm not sure if homeschooling has made me weird, but having a big family definitely has. I've lost any sense of shame and am sometimes so totally desperate to make my kids happy/settle them down that I will do just about anything. Found myself dancing to Britney Spears in the parking lot of the grocery store the other day.

[Quiver0f10]

Both sides of our extended family think we are completely nuts. At this point I don't think there is anything we could do that would suprise them. :lol:

[Haiku]

So, in the wake of that long ramble, let me ask--what have you reconsidered or questioned, having dipped one toe into the world of weird when you started homeschooling? Or am I alone in my weirdness...

 

For me it's been the other way around. Because of my questioning of other societal norms, I grew to question the idea of traditional schools. I don't know what made me a nonconformist, but I have been my entire life.

 

Tara

[Lolly]

Yes, I am weird. I don't really fit in any particular circle. I homeschool, selectively vacced(now just don't even bother), believe in a young earth, drive 2-4 hours a day to get my kids to swim practice, don't sew, don't worry about being green, eat out, allow my kids to eat junk and play video games, have sleepovers, hate cooking, and use textbooks now even though I personally don't care for them. Psers find me too conservative. Hsers find me too liberal. I just don't really give a flip what they think.:D

[MeaganS]

All of the alternative stuff is what brought me to homeschooling. It started with frugality. We're dirt poor (my husband is about to start med school) and we wanted me to be able to stay home with the kids. So, I researched everything we could do to save money. Starting with couponing, then cutting back (getting rid of satellite and texting, making do with what we had). Then cloth diapers. Then I decided I wanted chickens when we get a house. And a huge garden. And honey bees. And a compost bin, for the garden of course. Researching all of these things slowly helped me realize that the norms are unimportant and that being normal is boring. I want to be a stay-at-home mom so I can be there for my kids. Homschooling is an extension of that. My husband thinks I'm turning Hippie :)

[kewb]

I've always been a little out of step with the mainstream. As a kid I wanted to fit in. In college I realized it is better to be an individual. I was thinking and doing green before it became so popular. My parenting ideas were a bit out there compared to my friends. CIO was not an option for me. My ideas on nutrtiton were too strict (kids need to have a happy meal-I have been told) Homeschooling was a just another opportunity to fly my freak flag. Granted, if my ds had not been having the problems he was having in school I probably would not have ever started homeschooling but he did and now we are. Now that we have been hs for a year when I get together with my friends who send their kids to school some of the conversations seem downright weird to me.

 

Do what makes you happy and be an individual. Life is way better that way.

[swellmomma]

Homeschooling was a just another opportunity to fly my freak flag.

 

I love this line, It should be part of your signature, and if you don't use it I am so stealing it to add to mine.

[sparrow]

I suppose you might call it "weird". I prefer to call it being a "counterculturalist". :tongue_smilie: Homeschooling seems to be just an extension of my natural tendency to resist the influence of mass culture.

 

 

:iagree: or in our house we're PR or Punk Rock :D. We don't look the part so much anymore, but our DIY, "PRness" is still a major part of our lives.

 

I was a crazy cat lady before I was 21 years old (6 cats). Dh and I married, and QUICKLY, when everybody else was living together. We decided to adopt *instead* of having biological children. We made our decision, ahem, permanent, and I thought our Dr. was going to have a stroke!

 

It's been fun reading everyone's posts! It stands to reason that folks who decided to homeschool hear their own drummer...mine just happens to sound like Grant Hart from Husker Du :).

[kewb]

I love this line, It should be part of your signature, and if you don't use it I am so stealing it to add to mine.

 

Thanks. Feel free to claim it as your own. I don't mind sharing.

[amy g.]

Well, I'm stealing it too.

[tatertotschool]

I haven't read through all the threads yet- but I often feel that I don't fit in anywhere. I'm not weird enough to be out of the mainstream. I'm weird to my friends because I don't use paper towels, I cloth diaper, and only use vinegar and baking soda to clean my house. I'd never make my own soap- let alone get a goat. I'm a c-section having mama, I only breastfeed to a year- I NIP and co-sleep- until they start wallowing. I don't let my babies CIO, but I spank my children once they start displaying disobedience and defiance and can verbalize why they're being spanked.

 

I don't believe time outs are an effective form of discipline, and when my friends ask why my kids aren't kicking, screaming, and screaming at me whenever I tell them to do something- I tell them it's because I spank my kids and expect them to obey. My best friends child is not even three and has learned to use timeouts as a way of getting out of what he's been told to do, so he's actually being encouraged to be disobedient and defiant. I'm weird because I don't want my children to spend large amounts of time with out of control kids whose parents haven't found the right combination of "loving" discipline. I tire of the weird looks I get for talking about what God wants with my child. I tire of people telling me that it's just a stage, to just ignore their behavior.

 

When I chose to pull Ada out of preschool this year- my friends- even in church- really tried to encourage me to put her back in. I don't have to go over all the excuses they gave me, because I know you've all heard them and more since y'all are more seasoned than me. But I'm going to homeschool my kids because I want ME to be their roll model. There are plenty of other reasons- but since discipline is so important to me- the best way for me to Disciple them- is for them to be WITH me, and not with some other adult, and 25 other kids who are being raised differently than mine, during their most impressionable hours, particularly at such an impressionble age.

 

I'm not "weird" about food- although I once started going down that path and the lazy part of me won over. Of course I'm 50 lbs heavier that I'd like to be. I'm grossed out when I see people take weird- to what I consider , the extreme like only eating raw food- including raw meat.

Edited August 9, 2009 by tatertotschool

[elegantlion]

I was just explaining to my dh today that we are too weird to fit in anywhere. We would love to sell our house and travel. However we are stuck in suburbia too. Our yard isn't manicured to death, it's full of natural wonder and beauty, I'm sure the neighbors love us.

 

We like to do things together, we enjoy being around our son and were never excited about the idea of shipping him off to school.

 

We're self-employed, been remodeling something for the entire 16 1/2 years of marriage, let our son listen to old school rock-n-roll. Our son has seen us at our best and our worst and we've never been afraid to show him that we still learning and make mistakes sometimes. We let him stay up late, start school late, and follow rabbit trails during school.

 

We don't use credit, we have two cars that are paid for, a debit card and pay for most things with cash. That's unheard of in some of the circles we run.

 

My house is decorated but not in a trendy way. It looks more like an antique book and furniture store with a lived in feel. It looks like us, not a catalog.

 

I'm a christian, who believes in prayer, the power of healing, and I speak in tongues. I can't explain everything about my faith so I tend to stay out debates. That's my faith, but whatever faith/belief you chose to have I'll be your friend anyway. I tend to like people for who they are and I'm sure I'll learn a lot from you. That too is weird is some of the circles I've been in.

 

Homeschooling has fit in perfectly with our lifestyle. I believe it has given us the freedom to define ourselves as family, weird factor included.

[Elizabeth Conley]

We try to mimic main stream to a certain extent, but let's face it:

 

TV programming mostly stinks.

Our son is hearing impaired.

We're geeks.

Fashions have been seriously ugly and impractical for about 10 years now.

Life's to short to worry about what "normal" people think.

 

So we home school, travel, enjoy do-it-yourself projects, "odd" hobbies, and generally live like we were dying.

 

Why not?

[Desert Rat]

Well after reading all the other posts........I'm not weird at all!!! LOL Just kidding! I was born weird too. I was punk rock in high school, sticking safety pins through my ears and the whole bit. By college, I'd swung the other way and was a full-on hippie....no shaving for me. Talk about getting flack! I got married by 23 and everyone thought we had lost our minds. I gave birth naturally to both of my boys and nursed them as long as they wanted (19 months and 23 months). I let my 9yo have any hair cut he wants including his mohawk (my favorite) and the shaved skate do he sports now (his favorite). My 6yo is growing his hair long. I let them eat cereal for dinner--heck, less cookin' for me. And that's just for starters.

When you look in the dictionary under weird, there we are! LOL

Welcome to Weirdville, you'll fit right in!

[Happy]

I've never considered myself particularly weird or even terribly different. I was never in the popular group in high school or college, but I had friends.

 

I prefer to think of myself and our family as adventurous. We are willing to be, do, and learn about new things. We owned our own business for more than twenty years...learning every aspect of it from scratch.

 

We lived and worked on a farm, but my husband has always flown...first as a crop sprayer and now as an airline pilot.

 

We traveled to India early in our marriage to do short term mission work and came back rather different.

 

I lost my dad when I was twenty five and came to realize that life is SHORT. We've never saved much for retirement because I may not live that long. Who knows?

 

Because we couldn't have biological children, we adopted, which made us more different.

 

We researched and my husband worked hard to become an airline pilot.

 

We've lived in Europe. We've lived on a farm, in the suburbs, and in an apartment in a big city. We loved them all....as long as we are together.

 

Homeschooling was just one more adventure to learn and experience. And like someone else posted, the further from 'normal' we got, the less like 'normal' normal looked like.

 

Through out it all, I've been a creative soul. I need to create. I need beauty, story, color, and variety to be sane. Too many people I know consider those the 'extras' in life, not the essence of who they are.

 

We are not weird. We are different. I prefer to think of us a 'off-roaders' --willing to take the way less traveled.

[mamato4girls]

Not alone, I can't sew for anything so I haven't considered making our own clothes, but I definately consider other things, that are totally mainstream and "normal"...and wonder why they are "normal" if that makes sense

[WistfulRidge]

I've always been weird. I like weird. I'm anti-social, will be homeschooling, will be homesteading, a bit hippie-ish etc...

 

Normal is vastly overrated. If you're trying to be "normal" according to our society...how in the world do you ever actually have fun?

[MistyJ]

We started homeschooling because it was what my son needed. The longer we do it, the more I realize how enmeshed in contemporary culture (and materialism, where I live) we were.

 

The pulling away has helped us to watch t.v. and value our time more.

 

I knew I had crossed the line into "Homeschool Wierdo" just this month! My son, after many years of piano, started taking organ lessons. His teacher, a young man earning his PhD in organ, was homeschooled so that he could pursue his music. He had an organ in his basement as a child.

 

So, via craigslist, we found a 50 yo full size church organ for $150, it took

my dh and his friend about 8 hours to retrieve it from a small town up north, and 6 friends to get it down the stairs.

 

This was the moment I knew we were serious homeschoolers.

[MistyJ]

I would recommend reading (re-reading) Walden by Thoreau. I recently re-read it since we've become homeschoolers, and it was very affirming.

[Crissy]

I think eating my placenta was the pinnacle of my weirdness.

 

 

:001_huh:

 

I thought all the good homeschoolers stashed it in the freezer for 12 years, then buried it.

 

You ate it?!

[Jayne J]

Misty3--I just pulled it off my shelf (Walden that is). I haven't read it in a few years. Thanks for the reminder of a great book!

 

Crissy--my midwife offered me a recipe for placenta soup. Yup. I graciously declined. But hey, if you are ever in need of a recipe for 12 year old frozen placenta, send me a message and I'll get if from her...:D

 

I was glad to see this thread revived. I find it fascinating all the different, seemingly contradictory ways we are all weird together. For reasons of faith, conviction, idealism, or just plain ornery-ness we are all here in the same place--Weirdsville. :lol:

[tricia]

I too have always been a bit different. But I enjoy it as I see it as a challenge. I have been homeschooling for 23 years, have 12 kids so I have gotten a lot of experiences to broadcast my "weirdness." However, as time has gone on I am finding that I'm not so weird after all. That there really are all kinds of "weirdos" just like me in the world. (Thanks internet, now I don't feel so alone) Now, I KNOW I am not the only who......has lots of babies, homebirths, grinds my wheat, bakes my bread, juices my carrots, brews kombucha, drinks kefir lemonade, avoids the almighty doctor, (every chance I get), and what else? Hmmm. Maybe I've shared enough weirdness about myself for the time being.:bigear:

[tricia]

:001_huh:

 

I thought all the good homeschoolers stashed it in the freezer for 12 years, then buried it.

 

You ate it?!

 

I thought I was weird having hubby deal with my placenta by wrapping it in a years worth of newspaper and discarding it into the trash. My midwife did suggest we "use" it for nutritional purposes but we declined. However, we were thoughtful and offered it to her!!:bigear:

[Strawberry Queen]

Okay to add to the weirdness scale....

 

I have fantasies of living off the grid. You know making do with your own power-solar, wind, whatever.:001_smile:

 

I could so go down that road but ......there's the cost.

 

I am definitely an individual. I extended BF my kids anywhere and everywhere but I spanked their little hands and bottoms so I didn't quite fit in with the LLL crowd.

 

I've always made my own bread, have done jam, and have canned periodically. I make my own yogurt, have done the laundry soap thing (but it didn't work that well for me, maybe I need a new recipe).

 

I often fantasize about telling the fashion industry to shove it and let me be weird. But then I get a little too normal and go back. sigh :lol: I could so do the sew your own clothes thing but am a little too scared that we would be really weird and that my kids would be thought of as the strange ones. hee hee.

 

My favourite thrifty reading is the tightwad gazette and I desperately want to get the 2nd and 3rd volume. (my library got rid of them from the catalogue:-(. I'd even consider dumpster diving if there was something really good in there. :D

 

Yup. There are no two ways about it. I'm a strange homeschooler and I'm only likely to get weirder. Bring it on. :party:

[Dawn in OH]

You are not alone.

 

I spent years during my childhood trying so hard to be "normal" and "like everyone else". I can't believe all the time I wasted on something so stupid.

 

We get "weirder" every day by popular (I refuse to call them normal) societies standards. And that's just fine with me now.