Ann.without.an.e Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 Many people seem shocked that I would even consider allowing dd to go to a secular or non-conservative university. We are fairly conservative in our beliefs. Everyone I know will only allow their kids to go to college if it is to Liberty or Anderson, etc. We haven't even planned to look at those schools. We might visit Liberty if she gets National Merit since they give good aid for that, I think? Only because there aren't any schools close to us that provide good aid for finalists. Are any of you conservative and how important is it to your family that your student go to a conservative Christian school? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are what some consider conservative, but we consider moderate. United Methodist. But, many of the Christians in this area are very conservative. Currently, a friend and I have taken some "eyebrows" and stern looks from peers for our children's college choices. DD went to U of Michigan, Ds is very likely to land there, and if not there, Alma, which has a Scottish Presbyterian background but is only loosely affiliated and all inclusive, her DD is going to Northern Michigan in Marquette, and she and hubby are graduates of Michigan State. I am a graduate of a very liberal college. When she and her husband were in college, both of their sets of parents attended a very conservative Wesleyan church and received flack for allowing their kids to attend a secular U. For us, we figure that we tried to raise them in our faith traditions, did the best we could, lived our faith on our sleeves, and now as adults it's up to them. My husband is a graduate of a conservative Christian LAC and well, he'll tell you that just because the kids go there, that doesn't mean they live it or believe it. There are plenty of them making decisions that would make their parents' hair stand on end. That's how it is. We are generally against the types of religious institutions that put so many rules in place, that adults are infantilized and disrespected. That said, most of the kids from our church do either attend a secular community college and commute from home or go to very highly controlled colleges like Pensacola, Kentucky Mountain Bible College, Cornerstone, Indiana Wesleyan, etc. The unfortunate thing is that except for the ones that land at Pensacola or KMBC which have very low tuition, room and board, these kids are up to their eyeballs in debt when they get out and many resent their parents for pushing them to attend there when they could have gone to a secular college for far less dollars and debt. Additionally, some of these schools are low in accreditations that count, and that hurts them in their career path. To each their own...there are a lot of options out there, and it is unfortunate that some people feel the need to judge others in the matter, but it certainly does happen. I entirely ignore the local naysayers, LOL! So does my friend, and so did her parents as well as mine. Shoot, my folks were told I was headed straight to hell by way of college for letting me attend my highly ranked music school. They just raised an eyebrow, shook their heads, and walked away from the conversation. You don't have to defend your child's college choices to them. I do admit though that it is annoying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8filltheheart Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are a very religious family. Our kids go to secular universities. They go into fields that are dominated by secular thinking. They work with people who live completely secular lives. They are close friends with people who do not have any faith. We have raised our family to live completely in this world. That is what we are called to do. We also raise them to not be of this world bc that is life's purpose. They live quietly embracing truth and exemplify that truth by the way they choose to live. By adulthood, and yes, I believe 18 is adulthood, either faith is theirs in their core or it isn't. It is going to take living, one way or the other, for them to decide where they want to walk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted January 25, 2015 Author Share Posted January 25, 2015 The unfortunate thing is that except for the ones that land at Pensacola or KMBC which have very low tuition, room and board, these kids are up to their eyeballs in debt when they get out and many resent their parents for pushing them to attend there when they could have gone to a secular college for far less dollars and debt. Additionally, some of these schools are low in accreditations that count, and that hurts them in their career path. This is why we are mainly avoiding the private conservative schools. High price tag and very little aid. We just can't do that and do not think it wise for dd to go into such debt. My brother was offered zero aid for Liberty and a full ride at NCSU. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I would also suggest looking at the campus faith communities. In some cases, a school that is non-denominational or of a denomination not your own may well have less of a supportive faith community for your particular branch of Christianity than a secular school that has an on-campus ministry and a campus house. Liberty, for example, is a school that can be quite a hostile environment if you're not the "Right kind" of Christian. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I would also suggest looking at the campus faith communities. In some cases, a school that is non-denominational or of a denomination not your own may well have less of a supportive faith community for your particular branch of Christianity than a secular school that has an on-campus ministry and a campus house. Liberty, for example, is a school that can be quite a hostile environment if you're not the "Right kind" of Christian. This is very true! If ds attends U of MI, he has TONS of options for Bible Studies, Christian service ministries, etc., and he doesn't have ONLY one faith tradition or statement of faith that must be adhered to on campus. He is applying for the Christian leadership scholarships at Alma. If he earns it, he will lead an ecumenical Bible study - very open and inclusive - meet with the chaplain regularly, and be involved in a community service project with the other leaders and the chaplain as well as recruited students. But again, one does not have to claim an uber specific interpretation of scripture or church tradition other than fully believing in Jesus in order to participate. At my husband's college, he was not "the right kind" which he did not find out until after he enrolled, and so was rather lonely as no other options for worship, Bible study, or faith expression existed on campus. And 8FilltheHeart hit the nail on the head, we raise ours to be in the world and about their Father's business and our interpretation of that is this means not being exclusionary, and living as salt and light. No judgment on those that see it differently, it is just simply the choice we've made for our family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are pretty conservative but I think we are also practical. The college should fit the student's goals. If a Christian college is the best fit for my kid, great, but if not... that won't be our highest priority in choosing a school. We have ties with RUF (Reformed University Fellowship) and, all other things being equal, might point our kids to school at which they have a presence. But most schools have some sort of fellowship opportunities. I don't run into too many people who feel kids must go to Christian colleges. Most of the people at my church, including the pastor and elders, have kids in secular institutions. This Sunday morning I dropped my kid off at the county fire academy (a secular institution) for an introductory course in fire service. He was sent there by the fire company where he's starting volunteering. Some people would be aghast at him being in a class on Sunday. But today is the day the class is offered. (Just to be clear, I don't expect any flack over it at church when people ask where he is. If anything the response will be like "yeah, good for him.") Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 For context--We are fairly conservative with our theology. Although the church we attend right now is non-denominational, it is in line with our former church, which was Evangelical Free. Our theology is more on the conservative end of the spectrum, but we know many people who are more conservative than us. (Although, as a side note, I find that many issues people consider to be theological are actually cultural. In other words, choices of clothing, for example, are often deemed as more or less modest based entirely on the culture of that people group (and accepted "style") rather than actual physical coverage of the body. But I digress.) As for colleges: I attended a large public university. My friends from my private, Christian high school were all worried about the pressures I might face from antagonistic atheist professors or rampant drinking/partying. However, I was not as concerned partially because I was confident in my beliefs, partially because I had attended public schools prior to high school, and partially because I was feeling just a tiny bit cloistered and suffocated by the religious sub-culture my senior year. (Let me be clear--I had a fabulous experience in my high school and loved it there. But, at the end, though I was happy to choose to live according to my beliefs, I was also a little frustrated by some nuances of the sub-culture.) While I did encounter those things (just a few antagonistic atheist professors or drinking/partying) as well as other things that were antithetical to my personal faith, the key to thriving as a Christian was to have the support of a campus Christian group. In my case, I chose to be a part of InterVarsity Christian Fellowship. It was a really healthy mix. I lived in a normal dorm and went to classes and had many friends outside of IVCF, but I also had lots of Christian friends and events to help keep me active and centered in my faith. (I should also say--I only encountered a handful of antagonistic professors. Most of my profs or TAs were neutral or focused on teaching the material, and some were scrupulously honest in presenting religious themes. I was an English major, so faith came up quite a bit when the text we were studying referenced religious or biblical themes/symbolism. Most of the time, the discussion was totally fine and respectful.) (As for drinking/partying, I didn't really encounter pressure to drink. I was offered drinks, but always asked for a Coke and it was fine. My husband was a member of a fraternity and he lived in the fraternity house for 3 1/2 years and was not pressured to drink. As a freshman he made it clear that he preferred not to, and his brothers respected that. I know others have had different experiences, but our experience living as Christians in a secular university was positive.) We asked our daughter to evaluate both public and private schools, and she applied to an equal number of each. In looking at private schools, we have been really careful to sniff out the prevailing subculture, because, as another poster mentioned, private schools are prone to homogeneity. If you are not the "right kind" of Christian, your sojourn in some places can be lonely and painful. In looking at public schools, a major factor to consider has been where she would find support for her faith. For example, Purdue has been a really appealing choice because it has several thriving campus Christian groups. At every campus we have visited, we have attended at least one meeting of a campus Christian group (like IVCF or Navigators, etc.). The bottom line, for us, has been that Jesus called us to go out into the world. The early apostles were out there, talking to everyone, not cloistered in a Christian commune. If our own daughter chooses a private school (and there is one in particular that has a program that seems tailor-made to her specific interests), then she will do so knowing that it would be unhealthy for her to allow herself to be cloistered up with only Christians all the time. She would have to make choices for her summers and perhaps for her activities that will keep her from digging too deeply in the religious subculture. Conversely, if she chooses a public school, then she will do knowing that she has to make it a priority to set up a support system for her faith. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bugs Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are of the same mindset as many of the pp's. It just so happens that my daughter wants to go to a Christian college, but she has also applied to one state university. I MAY try to steer her away from certain secular colleges (really-not that many), but the choice is up to her. My nephew went to a state university and stayed in a Christian house on campus (I forgot what it is called but it is like a fraternity - there is the equivalent female house as well). He's still a good kid :laugh: . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 My niece is moderate to conservative in her religious beliefs. She's had no trouble at all finding like minded students at Chapel Hill. Despite their reputation of being a very liberal university (at least liberal for this area), there are apparently also plenty of Christian organizations and clubs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gratia271 Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 Many people seem shocked that I would even consider allowing dd to go to a secular or non-conservative university. We are fairly conservative in our beliefs. Everyone I know will only allow their kids to go to college if it is to Liberty or Anderson, etc. We haven't even planned to look at those schools. We might visit Liberty if she gets National Merit since they give good aid for that, I think? Only because there aren't any schools close to us that provide good aid for finalists. Are any of you conservative and how important is it to your family that your student go to a conservative Christian school? . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are a very religious family. Our kids go to secular universities. They go into fields that are dominated by secular thinking. They work with people who live completely secular lives. They are close friends with people who do not have any faith. We have raised our family to live completely in this world. That is what we are called to do. We also raise them to not be of this world bc that is life's purpose. They live quietly embracing truth and exemplify that truth by the way they choose to live. By adulthood, and yes, I believe 18 is adulthood, either faith is theirs in their core or it isn't. It is going to take living, one way or the other, for them to decide where they want to walk. This is my philosophy, as well. My college girl is in her second year at a very large, public, secular university. ETA: She was not homeschooled but attended a Christian private school K-12. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I'm from a very conservative background and generally still lean that way. My younger siblings all attended small Christian colleges (not Liberty). I think at least one of them would no longer self-identify as Christian and is definitely more liberal in religious and political beliefs than I am. I attended a very large state university. I attended campus fellowships occasionally, but I am not much of a group gathering sort of person in general; I didn't participate in much other campus life social stuff either. The thing about secular and large schools is that there's a little bit of everything available. Our campus had thriving groups for many religions, many interests, many things. They do big, in the good and the bad. Just like I found my niche in my academic department, I found a thriving campus church group that I enjoyed when I did attend. What I did notice is that most of the students who attended and were active in that group were really on fire for it and for God. I don't know what the climate is like at small Christian colleges with things like mandatory chapel attendance, but the kids who were really involved in campus ministry were really wholeheartedly and genuinely interested, really wanted to be attending, were really able to support other students in growing their faith. My one sibling's school had rules about males and females in each other's dorm rooms. He told me about kids who used to sneak around those rules. My dorm had no rules about that; we had males on the floor below ours (although thankfully, not co-ed bathrooms). Even friends' male or female only dorms didn't have restrictions about visiting hours or closed doors, just who could be in the halls unaccompanied. Sure, there were kids sleeping around, but the ones who weren't, weren't not because of rules designed to prohibit that, but because they chose not to. I would have no problem sending my Christian kid to a similar school. It would depend on the kid, though, and what I felt that kid needed. A very open and large school like that wouldn't necessarily find you a niche; you had to do it yourself, and a kid who needed more guidance might have some trouble in multiple ways and might benefit from a smaller school with more boundaries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I am not conservative, but attend a state university and wanted to share my experience. The culture of the city in which I attend is that Christianity is the prevailing religion, some very conservative, some not. The campus reflects that in the personal lives of students and teachers. There are active campus ministries. Two comments I've heard already this semester, both from history professors. 1. The professor said to leave your politics at the door and pick them up on the way out. I know from other things he's said, he most likely falls in the conservative christian role. 2. When you examine history (we were talking about the Ancient Israelites) you have to be willing to look at it from the secular academic perspective. The faith-based perspective is what you leave at the door and pick up on the way out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbgrace Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I attended a Christian school for my freshman year. They dropped my major, so I transferred to a large state University for the rest of my education. I quickly hooked up with a faith community (Intervarsity) there. I loved it, and was fed more spiritually in this environment. I remember feeling that those who decided to involve themselves in a Christian groups in a secular environment were, generally, truly serious about their faith. I do think there were more temptations due to freedom/lack of oversight on the secular campus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara H Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I'm enjoying reading this thread. I appreciate the thoughtful and respectful discussion. The last time I checked our state university has over 20 religious organizations. Several of the Christian organizations are really active. One has over 500 student members and they have events throughout the year. There are students who build a lot of their campus life around involvement in the religious organization. Of course you have no guarantee that your student will want this kind of involvement, but you also have no guarantee of that as a small Christian school because adults have free will and you can't dictate faith. What you can know is if your student wants to be heavily involved in a faith based organization there are plenty of opportunities to do so in college no matter what college they attend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creekland Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 I consider us to be conservative Christians - not in dress or culture types of deals, but definitely in (most) beliefs. Both hubby and I went to a state U. Our faith was challenged there - definitely - but I feel faith ought to be challenged to be "real." (Real is in quotes because I'm not sure it's the word I want, but I can't think of anything better.) We enjoyed our time in Christian organizations and enjoyed our time with secular (and Christian) friends. Oldest WANTED a Christian college - found one he liked - went there and enjoyed himself. He even met his wife there. Middle would have been open to a Christian college, but found what he liked in a secular school. He's doing well and has kept his faith. Youngest has opted for a small secular school. He doesn't have as many close friends who share his faith as what he would like, but he has no desire to transfer elsewhere (I asked). Our kids all know that we will accept them whether they continue to follow our faith or not. It's their choice - not ours. Our job was to raise them knowing why we believe what we believe. I like to think we've done that. We let our kids pick where they wanted to go - but honestly - I also discouraged places like Pensacola. There are way too many rules there for MY preference. Christianity isn't rules. It's love of the God who created us and a lifestyle that includes a relationship with Him. Love doesn't have rules except for Love God and Love your neighbor. Pharisees had rules. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are a very religious family. Our kids go to secular universities. They go into fields that are dominated by secular thinking. They work with people who live completely secular lives. They are close friends with people who do not have any faith. We have raised our family to live completely in this world. That is what we are called to do. We also raise them to not be of this world bc that is life's purpose. They live quietly embracing truth and exemplify that truth by the way they choose to live. By adulthood, and yes, I believe 18 is adulthood, either faith is theirs in their core or it isn't. It is going to take living, one way or the other, for them to decide where they want to walk. You did a fantastic job articulating this, thank you very much! :hurray: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted January 25, 2015 Author Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are a very religious family. Our kids go to secular universities. They go into fields that are dominated by secular thinking. They work with people who live completely secular lives. They are close friends with people who do not have any faith. We have raised our family to live completely in this world. That is what we are called to do. We also raise them to not be of this world bc that is life's purpose. They live quietly embracing truth and exemplify that truth by the way they choose to live. By adulthood, and yes, I believe 18 is adulthood, either faith is theirs in their core or it isn't. It is going to take living, one way or the other, for them to decide where they want to walk. Thank you. You articulated how we feel in a way that I cannot. Honestly, my dd doesn't want a Christian school for some of the same reasons. We probably won't even look at Liberty or Baylor unless she gets National Merit finalist and no great financial aid other places. She has said "if they require me to take Bible classes then I would prefer not to go there". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann.without.an.e Posted January 25, 2015 Author Share Posted January 25, 2015 I remember feeling that those who decided to involve themselves in a Christian groups in a secular environment were, generally, truly serious about their faith. I do think there were more temptations due to freedom/lack of oversight on the secular campus. Exactly what we have been thinking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 As someone from a country of 7 universities all state run I find the whole concept odd. Here you select by major and location nothing else. However we have a school of theology in our city because students found studying for ministry in an extremely secular environment was too hard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest2 Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 Love this thread. With oldest, academically, he needed a good enough school to ensure admission to grad school if he chose. The religious schools that he was considering had tiny classes ( 3-6 people) and he wanted a more broad Economics background. He also wanted there to be the option of worshiping and spending time with fellow believers of his faith. So while we knew he was headed to a larger probably state school, he only found two universities that he liked. Thankfully one was in out home state and he was admitted. Public Universities can have both a supportive faith component as well as quite a lot of living your faith in the world opportunities. He really enjoys meeting people from all over with all types of beliefs. I think a hostile environment would be a different thing and wouldn't have wanted my son at some of those places. FYI for him , some of the super conservative religious schools probably would have been some of those places. I went to a Christian high school and am very familiar with the expectations that people have. Often kids went to my school because parents(mistakenly) thought it would shape the kids up. It didn't for the most part. People still make their own choices. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Girls' Mom Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 We are fairly conservative Baptists. None of our kids will go to a Christian university, most likely. IMO, people that assume that going to a Christian university will shield them from secular behavior and beliefs have blinders on. Honestly, my kids have to grow up, live, and work in a secular world. Their choice of going to a secular University doesn't faze me. I've done my part in raising them in a Christian home. If that didn't take by 17-19 years old, then there isn't much left to be done on my part anyway. ETA....I'm responding in the assumption that the people the OP is talking about are thinking that they are accomplishing something more Christian or protective by only considering Christian schools and not even looking at other schools. There is nothing WRONG with going to one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted January 25, 2015 Share Posted January 25, 2015 Yes, I've run into that and have several friends who considered only Christian universities. One told me that I would "lose" my kids if I didn't do that. Even in my teaching at a local community college, there are kids who start there and plan to transfer to a Christian university to finish their degrees. It would be nice to say "let them decide," but we can't afford $35,000-50,000/year either, and that's a lot of debt for them to take on (our goal is less than $30,000 total if that). Also I was in scientific research and government program management for many years, and sat on many hiring committees. I know what kinds of discussions occur behind closed doors when someone presents a degree from a conservative Christian school to a secular employer. It isn't right, but they are considered lightweights by some individuals. Even if their other qualifications are good otherwise, there are employers that will find a reason to put their resume aside. Discrimination is a very real concern. Most of the hiring committees I was on had scoring sheets, and if enough individuals scored them down on their academic preparation, that was that. It disturbed me because only the conservative Protestant schools were viewed that way. The Catholic and Mormon schools weren't looked down upon. That said, I wouldn't send mine to a resident school where I hadn't checked out the Christian campus ministry groups and nearby church. At it has turned out, my oldest wants to start locally and explore a few different majors, so we don't have to worry about that yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kareni Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 I attended a Southern Baptist University as an undergraduate though I did not belong to any organized religion. It was a dry campus though dancing was permitted. There was a big drinking population on campus. Two of my best friends there were gay; they are still good friends. Drugs were quite available. All this to say that conservative universities may not be as conservative as one might think. Regards, Kareni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sebastian (a lady) Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 When we visited WVU I was struck by the number of churches and ministry groups with buildings right on the edge of campus. In several cases the university had expanded around them so that they were as close to dorms as campus buildings. One thought is that being in a setting where you attend a community church may put you in more situations with a wide age spread. It really helped me to be around some long married couples when I was in college. A few were stand ins for my parents when I needed older counsel. And it was nice to hang with other families who had kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathy in Richmond Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 Add me to the list of parents who have sent their very committed Christian kids to two very secular universities. By the time they're 18, they are either going to continue in their faith or not of their own accord. Both of mine found like-minded friends at school. Granted, they weren't in the majority by any means. At my son's school, all of the dorm floors have kids from freshman up to senior years. My son lucked into a floor of 12 kids where one of the seniors was holding a weekly Bible study, which ds joined. Later, that same kid became a friend in California, where they both had jobs. My daughter found a very vibrant Catholic community on her campus. Her friend circle includes many kids of all faiths (or none), but like my son, she came out at the other end of her 4 years still strong in her beliefs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 My four older kids have attended/are attending a large public university. They have all found like-minded friends, and have been involved in a local church where they built relationships with people of all ages. None have lost their faith, but have grown strong. One was in a rather serious relationship that concerned us, but later broke up and married someone we felt much more peaceful about. Yes, there are risks. There are also risks for students who go to a Christian campus and are disappointed with those who pretend to follow Christ but do not. Sometimes there are habits our kids have picked up that I was not crazy about, but nothing of great importance. They have mentioned they are glad they are where they are--people don't have any outside reason to fake their beliefs, so tend to be genuine if they are building relationships with serious believers. I would not say it is for everybody, by any means, but our children have done well, and will be well-prepared to enter into the secular workforce without being blown away by how others live and believe. We also tried to prepare them well before they went. It is not the end-all, but a nice side-effect is no debt at graduation, which our other options would not have provided. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muttichen Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 We are very conservative Christians and we have chosen to send our kids to send our kids to the best schools they could get into so that they would be best prepared to impact the world for Christ. Dh and I both attended a secular college and we found that our faith was strengthened there. There weren't a lot of Christians, but the ones who were there were very serious and close. One thing we did was have our kids email the Christian fellowship at each school they were accepted to before they went to the prefrosh visiting days. They asked to be assigned a Christian student to room with. That way they already had connections before they went. So far, by God's grace, they have all come through with their faith strong. One thing that surprised me is what a strong, visible presence the Christian groups have at schools where you might not expect it. Check this out: http://www.christianunion.org/cu-today/18-christian-union/388-god-is-on-the-move-at-princeton. This video is several years old and is only referencing one of Princeton's several large Christian fellowships. Altogether, my daughter tells me there are around 500 students involved in weekly Bible studies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 We are conservative Christian, in a denomination not known for that. Our oldest is at NCSU. The summer after her freshman year she questioned if she was a Christian or not. She took Christian off her label on Twitter. Personally, I was there. I saw her grow up. I saw the decisions she made and how she made them. I saw her heart on her sleeve for a friend. Once she and I talked about it, I pointed all these things out to her. Fall of sophomore year she started attending church with friends. She didn't go to the big campus ministry anymore, she found a smaller one that fit better with what she believes. She is in Germany for a semester and she is on the look-out for a church there. She doesn't like the church we as a family go to. But she doesn't have to. I don't want to be denomination locked. I want to be Christ locked. She is making her faith her own. And isn't that what we as parents want for our kids? I'm saying all this to try and reassure you. Just because they go to a non-conservative uni and they walk away, that doesn't mean they stay away from their faith. They may come back stronger in their faith anyway. (Not saying she did. But her faith is her own now. She tested it, she tried it, she passed in her own mind.) ETA: spelling mistake Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 I will add that, at some point, a child growing into adulthood must decide whether or not to do as Cheryl's daughter has, and own their faith. It can be a crisis point, and can be a pretty anxious time as a parent watching. Yet, I feel that it is vital for their faith to be well-grounded and strong. The crisis point may be obvious or it may be quiet. I have encouraged our children to please please please not make any major (or stupid ;) ) decisions when they are in a confused and 'processing' place, though of course, faith is always in process to some degree. Hope this makes sense. :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Marple Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 We are a very religious family. Our kids go to secular universities. They go into fields that are dominated by secular thinking. They work with people who live completely secular lives. They are close friends with people who do not have any faith. We have raised our family to live completely in this world. That is what we are called to do. We also raise them to not be of this world bc that is life's purpose. They live quietly embracing truth and exemplify that truth by the way they choose to live. By adulthood, and yes, I believe 18 is adulthood, either faith is theirs in their core or it isn't. It is going to take living, one way or the other, for them to decide where they want to walk. Although I already liked this post, I just wanted to give it a second airing :) Completely agree with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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