Blueridge Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 (edited) A friend sent this to me today. :D (I want to add that I mean no disrespect to anyone who has a child in a public school...just something silly that brightened my day.) Memo: Top 10 Reasons to Criminalize Homeschooling In an effort to increase the public drumbeat for criminalizing homeschooling, a memo has been distributed containing the top 10 reasons why public schooling is better than homeschooling. Here is an excerpt from that memo: 1. Most parents were educated in the under funded public school system, and so are not smart enough to homeschool their own children. 2. Children who receive one-on-one homeschooling will learn more than others, giving them an unfair advantage in the marketplace. This is undemocratic. 3. How can children learn to defend themselves unless they have to fight off bullies on a daily basis? 4. Ridicule from other children is important to the socialization process. 5. Children in public schools can get more practice "Just Saying No" to drugs, cigarettes and alcohol. 6. Fluorescent lighting may have significant health benefits. 7. Publicly asking permission to go to the bathroom teaches young people their place in society. 8. The fashion industry depends upon the peer pressure that only public schools can generate. 9. Public schools foster cultural literacy, passing on important traditions like the singing of "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..." 10. Homeschooled children may not learn important office career skills, like how to sit still for six hours straight. Edited March 5, 2009 by Blueridge adding a disclaimer :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 :lol: -Robin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 :lol: Seriously, my diet coke almost came out my nose! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MBM Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Eh? I guess I just don't find humor at the expense of others all that funny. :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katrina Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Eh? I guess I just don't find humor at the expense of others all that funny. :confused: I don't think the humor is supposed actually supposed to be directed at kids in PS, but more at the reasons why people say homeschooling is bad. For example, people have said things like "How are homeschoolers supposed to get tough if they don't have to fight bullies at school." "Homeschool kids aren't socialized," etc. It's just saying that PS isn't the utopia that some make it out to be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracey in TX Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Hard to find the favorite rationale! :) "jingle bells...batman smells...robin laid an egg" Ah, maaaannn, that's going through my under-educated, former public school brain now. nanananana....take THAT!:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 ROFLOL!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gretchen in NJ Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 :smilielol5:Oh my! :smilielol5: That is funny!:smilielol5: :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyBlueLobsters Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 :tongue_smilie: :w00t: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoo Keeper Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I needed this list yesterday! I was at our family doctor and he was going on about how my children needed to be in public school--so that they can learn how to handle adversity and unpleasant circumstances; he even went on to share how his daughter has had trouble w/cyber bullying and that her misery and how she dealt with it all has made her better equipped for adult life!:confused: I like the man as doctor, but I am a bad parent because I am not exposing my children to bullying? Huh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Wait, we learned Jingle Bells, Batman smells as part of school anyway. :lol::lol::lol: #10 hits home for us. :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 beans, beans, good for your heart the more you eat, the more you.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 You mean I'm not supposed to have taught those jingles to my kids in homeschool? :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnnetteB Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 I needed this list yesterday! I was at our family doctor and he was going on about how my children needed to be in public school--so that they can learn how to handle adversity and unpleasant circumstances; he even went on to share how his daughter has had trouble w/cyber bullying and that her misery and how she dealt with it all has made her better equipped for adult life!:confused: I like the man as doctor, but I am a bad parent because I am not exposing my children to bullying? Huh? Wow, our doctors have thought that home education is a positive thing. My allergist in southern California actually said that home educating the children was going to benefit my asthma, chronic sinusitis and bronchitus by saving me from endless "bugs" brought home from school. Olivia's endocrinologist says that home education is a great thing for managing her type 1 diabetes. She says that schools sabotage efforts to manage blood sugars in many of her young patients. Your dr. sounds a bit like my mil touting the benefits of the "School of Hard Knocks." My older dc have managed to adapt to life outside our "hothouse" very well and she has softened a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gretchen in NJ Posted March 5, 2009 Share Posted March 5, 2009 Wait, we learned Jingle Bells, Batman smells as part of school anyway. :lol::lol::lol: #10 hits home for us. :lol::lol::lol: You mean I'm not supposed to have taught those jingles to my kids in homeschool? :001_huh: :smilielol5:Too funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julpost Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 :lol: I'll have to pass that one on~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 You mean I'm not supposed to have taught those jingles to my kids in homeschool? :001_huh: I guess I shouldn't have taught my children "I see London. I see France. I see (my own child's) underpants!" :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackie in NE Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 :lol::lol: Hard to find the favorite rationale! :) "jingle bells...batman smells...robin laid an egg" Ah, maaaannn, that's going through my under-educated, former public school brain now. nanananana....take THAT!:D :smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoo Keeper Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Wow, our doctors have thought that home education is a positive thing. My allergist in southern California actually said that home educating the children was going to benefit my asthma, chronic sinusitis and bronchitus by saving me from endless "bugs" brought home from school. Olivia's endocrinologist says that home education is a great thing for managing her type 1 diabetes. She says that schools sabotage efforts to manage blood sugars in many of her young patients. Your dr. sounds a bit like my mil touting the benefits of the "School of Hard Knocks." My older dc have managed to adapt to life outside our "hothouse" very well and she has softened a bit. Thanks for the positive note--maybe my doctor can soften too. Even if he doesn't, I'll do my best for my family and let him do his best for his family!;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 (edited) Eh? I guess I just don't find humor at the expense of others all that funny. :confused: The majority of humor is at the expense of others. The favourite ha-ha I learned here, I use. When someone wonders how my son will cope with difficult people, I actually reply "Obviously, you don't know my husband very well." It shuts them up immediately. Edited March 6, 2009 by kalanamak Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I like the man as doctor, but I am a bad parent because I am not exposing my children to bullying? Huh? Just remember what scarification a doc goes through in life. It takes a certain type to accept it and cope with it. Personally, I think a summer job as low man on the totem pole at a truckstop diner is plenty of abuse for one teenager to last a lifetime. Ask me how I know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 You mean I'm not supposed to have taught those jingles to my kids in homeschool? :001_huh: I skipped the jingles - the neighbors taught them those as soon as they learned them. Instead, I decided to teach the dc literary terms, such as "alliteration." Of course, we all know the best example of alliteration is "Great green gobs of greasy, grimy...." Then, we had to do a historical study of the song, and we discovered that what we thought was an entire song is actually the chorus to the old favorite "Blood on the Saddle." Ah, yes. My dc are educated in the important things that will make them able to fit in with their ps peers, plus they learn the history. Isn't homeschooling grand? :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeannie in NJ Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the school the teachers were shooting a cool game of pool When what to my wondering eyes should appear but Mr. (insert any teacher's name) with a 6 pack of beer and I can't remember the rest of it lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 :smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoughCollie Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Hey, I thought teaching them to sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..." was part of music class. That, and the song that has "the worms crawl in the worms crawl out, the worms play pinochle on your snout". I actually researched the words to the latter song on the internet to make sure I could teach the DC all the verses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 ...To the tune of the whistling song from "Bridge over the River Kwai"... :D:D:D Comet, it makes your mouth turn green. Comet, it tastes like gasoline. Comet, it makes you v*mit. So drink some Comet, and v*mit, today. ...and I went to a Christian school all 12 years-- learned in first grade on the bus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Altogether now! Row, row, row your boat Gently down the stream. Throw your teacher overboard, And listen to her scream. (I prefer the above tune to "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" for obvious reasons.);) -Robin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyJoy Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Hey, I thought teaching them to sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..." was part of music class. That, and the song that has "the worms crawl in the worms crawl out, the worms play pinochle on your snout". I actually researched the words to the latter song on the internet to make sure I could teach the DC all the verses. My dad taught me "The worms crawl in..." when I was about 6. It came back to bite him when I was 12 however, because for his 40th birthday I wrote this to the same tune: Your 40th birthday now is here. Your hair will slowly disappear. You're getting fat, you're getting old. Your teeth are turning a yellowish-gold. The TV is more interesting. You raise your eyebrows when you sing. You've got a gut you can't suck in. Forty is the end. (maniacal laughter) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyJoy Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Altogether now! Row, row, row your boat Gently down the stream. Throw your teacher overboard, And listen to her scream. (I prefer the above tune to "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" for obvious reasons.);) -Robin Don't forget Deck the halls with gasoline Fa la la la la, la la la la. Light a match and watch it gleam. Fa la la la la, la la la la. Burn the school right down to ashes. Fa la la, fa la la, la la la. Aren't you glad I play with matches? Fa la la la la, la la, la la. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 In days of old when knights were bold and toilets not invented they dropped their load by the side of the road and walked away contented. My oldest learned that one is preschool. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I must have lead a sheltered life. Half of these ditties I've never heard before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 In days of old when knights were bold and toilets not invented they dropped their load by the side of the road and walked away contented. My oldest learned that one is preschool. :lol: That has me :lol: I taught my kids this one: Trick or treat, smell my feet Give me something good to eat. If you don't, I don't care, I'll pull down your underwear. :blushing: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Katia Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 Ok, this is what dh taught all our dc: 'Twas in the middle of the night When two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, Drew their swords and shot each other. A deaf policeman heard the noise And came and arrested those two dead boys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snickerdoodle Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 (On top of Old Smokey) On top of spaghetti, All covered with cheese, I lost my poor meatball, When somebody sneezed. It rolled off the table, And on to the floor, And then my poor meatball, Rolled out the front door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted March 6, 2009 Share Posted March 6, 2009 I declare this thread officially hijacked! (Apologies to the OP.) Ok, this is what dh taught all our dc: 'Twas in the middle of the night When two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, Drew their swords and shot each other. A deaf policeman heard the noise And came and arrested those two dead boys. Oh, you forgot the last 2 lines: And if you don't believe this lie is true, Go ask the blind man. He saw it too! -Robin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iquilt Posted March 7, 2009 Share Posted March 7, 2009 My MIL taught my kiddos On Top of Old Smokie! For the record, she thinks I'm ruining them by homeschooling them and by having more than 2 kids :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JWSJ Posted March 7, 2009 Share Posted March 7, 2009 Memo: Top 10 Reasons to Criminalize Homeschooling Except for #6, I've actually had people give these as legit reasons to me. Scary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kessepha Posted March 7, 2009 Share Posted March 7, 2009 I declare this thread officially hijacked! (Apologies to the OP.) Oh, you forgot the last 2 lines: And if you don't believe this lie is true, Go ask the blind man. He saw it too! -Robin Yup. My dad taught us that one... although he began it with "one bright sunny day in the middle of the night" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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