Do your teens work? Did you work as a teen? what do they do? what did you do?

[Wheres Toto]

My oldest worked at her dance studio while in high school, then for Target after her first year of college until this past June.  She worked at a camp all summer and now works at a small boutique.

 

I babysat, worked at a few other retail jobs, then Kmart from Junior year in high school through college breaks for the first couple years.  Then I started regular full time office jobs and have worked except for 8 years home with the younger kids.

[bettyandbob]

Everyone keeps saying kids had drivers licenses before and drove themselves to work. In the 70s and early 80s my siblings did get out licenses, but we didn't have cars. We all found work we could walk, take public transit, or bike to. We lived in what was then an exurb so transit wasn't great, but we figured it out. We also earned good grades and participated in school sports. So, finding balance could be done. I think the big thing was we all figured out how to get jobs, manage time and transportation without our parents' involvement. This was big in personal development.

 

Our parents also did not tell us what to do with the money. We bought our own clothing, sports equipment and saved for college. None of us decided to spend the money on cigarettes despite the fact that our parents didn't control our money (weird concept suggested by a pp).

 

I think it is very individual what a family and child can handle. I've had to approach my older DC very differently. I let dd manage everything herself mostly from the start. Working has not interfered with grades nor has she had to cut back on ballet (30 hours/week summer, 15 hours/week school). With ds we factored in a lot of 2E issues to determine what was best.

 

I think high level sports or big volunteer commitments can teach some of the same things, but not all. That doesn't mean a child will miss something essential by not working. It's really how you handle other things in parenting that fills in gaps. Volunteering and sports also provide opportunities that working may not. So, its really about the child using the opportunities available to the best advantage.

[J-rap]

With the awful pink tunic uniform?  LOL.  Me too.  

 

And same with the rest.  No one didn't work, at least in the summer, and most, year=round.  AND we all got our driver's licenses the minute we could.  THAT is different today.

 

Oh funny!  It must've been the pink tunic, though I can't remember!  I remember being so messy, and having to wash my uniform often -- ha.  My favorite flavor was Praline Pecan.  :D

 

[Hkpiano]

I had a paper route from ages 11-14, then I started babysitting and teaching beginning flute lessons. At age 16, I started working at McDonald's, where I worked for 2 1/2 years. It was a terrible, terrible place for me to work. I was a very naive homeschooled pastor's daughter with super strict parents, and I was very impressionable. My coworkers and managers there were not good people for me to look up to, and I ended up in a relationship with one manager (10 years older than me and an alcoholic). I didn't go to college because of him (passing up a full-ride scholarship based on my flute playing and my SAT scores). I eventually pulled my life back together several years later, but I still haven't completed college and I deeply regret the choices made in that period of my life.

 

Because of my experience, I will encourage my kids to get jobs in high school, but not in fast food and similar caliber jobs, knowing now what an unhealthy environment it can be. I know not all kids will be as easily influenced as I was, but I can't help but feel there must have been other places I could have worked that would not have been such a negative influence.

 

Edited for clarity.

[Sara in AZ]

I worked for my dad at his insurance agency filing and such from the time I was about 10 until the summer before college when I was his secretary for 3 months. I also babysat, taught piano lessons, and accompanied for a voice teacher and others. I also had a weekly gig cleaning and laundering for my grandpa for a few years. I think he honestly thought he was training me to be a good maid!

 

My oldest is barely 13, and we are trying to brainstorm ways for her to earn money besides doing work for us. She has several expensive trips coming up we'd like her to contribute to. I'd love for my children to be able to make money in their teen years doing something they are good at and enjoy as I did with my music. Working on the motivation aspect with my young teen...

 

Lots of great ideas in this thread!

[Sara in AZ]

DP

[Peaceful Isle]

I worked as a teen. From ages 13- 16 I babysat. At 17-23 I worked at a convenient store, bakery, and fast food. Much of that time I was full time in college. At 23 I started my first teaching job at a private school. :)

 

My oldest babysits.

[Joker]

I also want to point out that I think school and academics are a lot different today than when I was in school and able to work. Both of mine are in school from 7:30am-3pm, which means they are out of the house from 6:50am-3:30pm. Oldest, a sophomore, is slammed with homework. She's had two hours of homework each night for the last two nights for only one class (AP World History). When you add in her other homework, showering, exercising (she needs due to anxiety), eating, and sleeping there is no time for a job during the week. There are none around here I know of that allow Saturdays only. So, volunteering makes the most sense. 

 

When I was in high school, I was able to work and participate in sports. I never had as much homework to do as both of mine do today. Dh had the same experience in a school on the other side of the country.

[Sarah CB]

I do think there are benefits to having paid jobs before college.  There are things we learn as employees and members of work teams that are different from volunteering or sports or pursuing individual goals.  These realities inform our school work and social interactions as well as prepare us for future work.  Of course it is just one of many good things kids can choose to do, and nobody can do it all.  I probably would not discourage it if my kid wanted to do it, though.

 

What things are only learned through paid employment?  

 

Ds volunteered at the hospital bistro.  He was expected to "work" there 4 hours per week.  He had to serve customers, prepare food, handle cash, etc.  I'm not sure how his experience volunteering in the bistro would be any different from someone working for money in a bistro???   

 

He also volunteered at a retirement home.  He had to bring fresh water to all the residents on his floor, wash the dishes, help residents to the dining hall and help feed the residents.  We had friends whose daughters worked in a retirement home as servers in the dining hall - again, not sure how their experience being paid for their work differed greatly from what ds did voluntarily?  

 

Besides the teamwork he has learned through his various volunteer positions, there's also the whole focus on teamwork as a member of a small musical ensemble and as a member of the youth orchestra.  One of the greatest lessons that will directly apply to a career later is that work doesn't end when you leave the building.  As a musician, ds can't just put in his time at rehearsal and then show up to the performance and get on stage.  He has to be independently responsible for putting in hours of practice on his own - without his "boss" checking in on him, without punching a time card, without any oversight.  The kind of work ethic this is teaching him will help him go far in whatever it is he pursues professionally.  

 

I definitely see the value in teens working.  However, I also think there are teens who will gain more value from spending their time on other pursuits.  

[Chris in VA]

Dd sets up the tables at church for our bell choir. Her pay goes into her mission trip account. She is also the weekend sexton, which means she locks the church and outbuildings on Sat and Sun. That $ is her own. Shes saving for a phone (we don't pay for that).

 

My boys would occasionally help an elderly family friend with his vending machine route, but other than that they didn't work while in high school.

 

I babysat.

[lllll]

nm

[kewb]

Back in the day I babysat.

Both my kids became lifeguards at age 15 and started working summers.

My daughter has done some babysitting.

They have both done some volunteer work.

[sassenach]

So far the oldest has done a ton of nannying and had a short stint at a food establishment. Ds13 has started umpiring little league games during the season. He made over $200 last year, which was pretty sweet for a 12yo. He plans on life guarding in the future.

[Bluegoat]

Oh, I know the laws have changed.  But so have kids' attitudes.  Many of the parents I know (myself included) had to force their kids to get their licenses at 17 or 18.  It's odd.  And it was *exceedingly* frustrating to me, because I could see the social doors closing on my kid as he delayed getting his license.  :0/  

 

The thing that I thought was most hilarious is that so many of the kids I knew had NO CLUE how to get from point A to point B once they were driving themselves.  They had had their noses in their smartphones while Mom drove for all those years.  One gal (very smart blah blah blah) had gone to the same school every day since Kindergarten but got lost the first day she drove there alone.  I thought I'd never stop laughing.  Well, I will...because I hope she will be able to drive me around when I am old and decrepit and can't find MY way anymore.  LOL

 

This attitude to driving is something that demographers have noticed - it is particularly associated with millenials, but it seems to apply generally to the generations that have been abandoning suburbs for cities.

 

As a group they just don't seem to really be interested in cars - they don't particularly see them as a sign of any real achievement or that a nice car reflects on their social status, and they don't seem to particularly enjoy driving. 

 

A lot of it seems to be tied up in the desire to live in communities where work and shops and such are closer.  I suspect awareness of environmental issues may be part of it, and the cost of maintaining and insuring - they can in many ways tie you down as much as they can give freedom.  They may associate cars with long commutes.

 

My husband thinks part of it is that cars are not all that fun to drive - city driving tends to be tedious and in North America the cars are almost all automatics.

 

[Bluegoat]

What things are only learned through paid employment?  

 

Ds volunteered at the hospital bistro.  He was expected to "work" there 4 hours per week.  He had to serve customers, prepare food, handle cash, etc.  I'm not sure how his experience volunteering in the bistro would be any different from someone working for money in a bistro???   

 

He also volunteered at a retirement home.  He had to bring fresh water to all the residents on his floor, wash the dishes, help residents to the dining hall and help feed the residents.  We had friends whose daughters worked in a retirement home as servers in the dining hall - again, not sure how their experience being paid for their work differed greatly from what ds did voluntarily?  

 

Besides the teamwork he has learned through his various volunteer positions, there's also the whole focus on teamwork as a member of a small musical ensemble and as a member of the youth orchestra.  One of the greatest lessons that will directly apply to a career later is that work doesn't end when you leave the building.  As a musician, ds can't just put in his time at rehearsal and then show up to the performance and get on stage.  He has to be independently responsible for putting in hours of practice on his own - without his "boss" checking in on him, without punching a time card, without any oversight.  The kind of work ethic this is teaching him will help him go far in whatever it is he pursues professionally.  

 

I definitely see the value in teens working.  However, I also think there are teens who will gain more value from spending their time on other pursuits.  

 

I think one of the most important might be the sense of self-sufficiency.  A bit like the difference, for a toddler, between having someone dress you and dressing yourself.  Developmentally, teens are at a point when they are wanting to establish themselves as adults, capable of self-care, and that isn't just about being competent at tasks, it is maybe even more about a sense that you are providing for yourself.  Contribution to the community through volunteer work can help, but i think even that is not quite the same as actually earning part of your own keep, even if it is just spending money.

 

Even better might be actually doing work that is important to the financial stability of the family as a whole, but that is usually only available to kids whose parents are farmers or small business owners.  But kids that I know that have had that opportunity seem to have a kind of maturity that is quite unusual in teens, and it seems often even in young adults in their 20s.

 

[Guest]

Yes, my teens have worked and I also worked when I was a teen.

 

DD did babysitting and dog walking, and also did pretty regular volunteer work at a cat shelter. The summer she was 16, she worked at a shake and smoothie booth at the mall. The summer before she left for college, she only did dog walking gigs and volunteer work.

 

DS worked this past summer for DH in construction. This was absolutely great for him, on so many levels. One, it helped him bond with his dad. Two, it takes a lot of physical strength and toughness to do some of that work. Three, he learned a lot of useful handyman skills, and he also gets to see and hear how his father interacts with others for business. There are a lot of people skills to be learned there.

 

I worked at a retail clothing store when I turned sixteen. Before that, I had done some pet sitting or baby sitting, but not much. My older sister was in greater demand and I only got her occassional overflow. ;) I also did yard work for a friend of my parents when I was 13/14. When I was seventeen, I worked as a relief receptionist at a hair salon, just Tuesday night and Saturday. That was a very good gig, actually. I wish I would have kept that job longer but I quit because it got to be a drag working every weekend.

 

I do think it is very valuable for kids to work, to learn handy skills and gain experience in working with people. There is also something to be said for doing meaningful volunteer work as well.

[Jennifer132]

I don't have teens yet. But I started working for my dad when I was 12, assembling/testing/bagging parts for his electronic company. At 13 I started baby sitting. At 16 I got a job at Forever 21 (teen clothing store). And then my senior year (17), I worked at a preschool as a teacher's aide.

 

One of the reasons I started working at 16 was that I let my friend drive my car around the parking lot, and he crashed it and busted the window out of the back. My parents made me go to work to pay for the window (I didn't get the window replaced until I had earned enough money to do so, so I was literally driving around without a window for a bit there).

[shage]

Oldest has worked for a contractor part time since age 13, plus seasonal work in retail and repairing bicycles. Second child babysits and tutors, would like to work retail but needs to be 16 to have much of a chance. Current 13 year old works sporadically for a contractor and has a swim teaching gig.

[busymama7]

My kids have had a hard time finding jobs as so many won't hire under 18. My oldest is on an lds mission now but he filled vending machines for a neighbors business and also did office assisting for a friends business part time. My next one works in fast food but she only got the job because of someone we know. My 3rd just got a job apprenticing in a music repair shop working on instruments. This is a huge blessing and is in part because he is homeschooled and can work the hours when they are there to train him. He really wanted to do this and we made friends with the local family owned shop and eventually they hired him even though he is only 15. I could see him doing this as a full time job as an adult but if not it is a means to and end and a great trade to have. He also will be starting to tune pianos on the side.

[Matryoshka]

When I was a teen, I worked first babysitting, then picking apple drops in an orchard for cider, then my first 'real' job (as in, I got a paycheck with witholding) was at Friendly Ice Cream as a waitress when I was about 15?  Or I may have just turned 16 - not sure exactly when I started.  I know it was junior year, and I turned 16 in Feb of junior year.  My senior year I worked at a fabric store.

 

One of my twins got a job last year (her junior year) working at a store that mostly did online orders, so she mostly packed boxes for shipment; she worked Sundays from 12-5.  She's currently not working, though.  Her twin sister got her first job this year (she's 17), at Chipotle; she works about 10 hours on Sat. and Sunday.  She's using a bunch of the money to take a trip to the Netherlands and Germany over winter break (most of her classes are at the CC).  She'll just have to bring a computer and keep up with her online math class.

 

It is weird how many places won't let you work until you're 18 now, though.  Many places they asked had that restriction.  The most bizarro is Jo-Ann Fabrics.  Apparently you have to be 18 to work there because you have to use... scissors.  We can't let those high school kids near the scissors!  Who knows what might happen!!  And yet I managed not to cut off any fingers when I worked at a similar store in high school...

 

 

[busymama7]

When I was a teen, I worked first babysitting, then picking apple drops in an orchard for cider, then my first 'real' job (as in, I got a paycheck with witholding) was at Friendly Ice Cream as a waitress when I was about 15? Or I may have just turned 16 - not sure exactly when I started. I know it was junior year, and I turned 16 in Feb of junior year. My senior year I worked at a fabric store.

 

One of my twins got a job last year (her junior year) working at a store that mostly did online orders, so she mostly packed boxes for shipment; she worked Sundays from 12-5. She's currently not working, though. Her twin sister got her first job this year (she's 17), at Chipotle; she works about 10 hours on Sat. and Sunday. She's using a bunch of the money to take a trip to the Netherlands and Germany over winter break (most of her classes are at the CC). She'll just have to bring a computer and keep up with her online math class.

 

It is weird how many places won't let you work until you're 18 now, though. Many places they asked had that restriction. The most bizarro is Jo-Ann Fabrics. Apparently you have to be 18 to work there because you have to use... scissors. We can't let those high school kids near the scissors! Who knows what might happen!! And yet I managed not to cut off any fingers when I worked at a similar store in high school...

I cut fabric as a teen too and live to tell about with all my fingers. ;). and my aforementioned son uses a torch of all things in the repair shop :) he has had a couple burns and got stabbed through the finger with a flute spring. But hey he's learning important lessons! I think in general our society is babying teens way too much.

[Matryoshka]

I cut fabric as a teen too and live to tell about with all my fingers. ;). and my aforementioned son uses a torch of all things in the repair shop :) he has had a couple burns and got stabbed through the finger with a flute spring. But hey he's learning important lessons! I think in general our society is babying teens way too much.

 

When we went in to Jo-Ann's to ask about a job, we did mention that she was currently interning at a living history museum where she worked a lot with sharp knives and routinely cooked and dyed wool over large open flames.  But no, scissors still too dangerous...

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

 

 

My teen volunteers weekly at local nursing home and does yard work for his grandparents. Currently he doesn't have a traditional paying job.

 

 

I worked at a dance club for teens, university food service, fast food, and retail.

 

 

Jobs for teens are harder to come by here now.

[ssque]

I think it's best to get teens either working outside doing landscaping for the exercise. Or have them be a waiter/ waitress. This either helps keep them in shape or gets them speaking with other people and learning conversation skills.

[Joker]

I think it's best to get teens either working outside doing landscaping for the exercise. Or have them be a waiter/ waitress. This either helps keep them in shape or gets them speaking with other people and learning conversation skills.

 

 

Or they can work out at the gym regularly (and be active in their daily lives) and volunteer in positions that have them conversing with others. I honestly feel my dds are getting more out of volunteering than I ever did with working. My dds definitely have more contact and conversations with diverse groups of people while they volunteer than they would working in the local grocery store or fast food/restaurant place. 

[Ginadee12]

Or they can work out at the gym regularly (and be active in their daily lives) and volunteer in positions that have them conversing with others. I honestly feel my dds are getting more out of volunteering than I ever did with working. My dds definitely have more contact and conversations with diverse groups of people while they volunteer than they would working in the local grocery store or fast food/restaurant place. 

 

The gym is a great idea. It gets them involved with fitness at an early age and hopefully they stick to it.

[LucyStoner]

I worked in a daycare.  I babysat.  I tutored.  I worked the polls after I turned 16.  I once worked in an ice cream shop for like 5 minutes (I quit because I wasn't ok being hit on).  I got paid to provide childcare in the church nursery for choir practice and other evening events.  I sold a small 'zine.  I bought clothes at thrift shops and resold them at vintage shops.  I got stipends for various internships and committee work. In short, I did a lot.  My first on the books job where taxes were deducted was in 1992.  I was 12.  

 

When I was 17-19 I transitioned to:  PT nanny, housekeeper, childcare coordinator at the Y, legal assistant, ticket sales/box office for an arts organization, paid lobbying.  

[Lolly]

It is weird how many places won't let you work until you're 18 now, though.  Many places they asked had that restriction.  The most bizarro is Jo-Ann Fabrics.  Apparently you have to be 18 to work there because you have to use... scissors.  We can't let those high school kids near the scissors!  Who knows what might happen!!  And yet I managed not to cut off any fingers when I worked at a similar store in high school...

 

Very true. Dd22 applied to work at a little deli near our home when she was 17. Nope, it was illegal because they had a meat slicer. That rule made every person working there have to be at least 18. The guy had a younger person working there before that and was hit with a hefty fine even though that dc  ever touched the slicer (which is what he thought the rule was). The fine was higher than if he had had an underage person serving alcohol. It ended up putting him out of business.

[Joyofsixreboot]

I worked from about 10 starting with yard work, moving to babysitting and then waitressing and hospital cafeteria work. All my kids have followed a similar pattern. This summer 17 yo worked/works as a receptionist at a local elder care facility, 14 yo mowed about four yards and 11 yo sold cookies and stuffed animals at two farmer's markets. The 8 yo is a sluggard.

[Mrs. Y]

My dc work on the farm. They generally graduate from one job to another as they age out of them.

 

Then the older ones (early to late teens) make money buying, selling, fixing trucks, tractor, lawn mowers. (So, I guess you'd say they are self employed at home).

 

My 17 yods works off farm building pole barns. 19 yodd works at a bakery plus for us here in our business.

[Lady Florida.]

I worked starting when I was a senior in high school (16), first at a movie theater then later in the fabric department of a regional discount store. Some of my friends worked, some didn't. I haven't seen any difference in us as adults (between those who worked and those who didn't). I worked in high school and while I was living at home going to community college. Once I transferred to a university and lived away from home, I didn't work again until after I graduated.

 

Dh had a newspaper route (something no longer available to kids) when he was 12 years old. Later during his high school years, he worked in a grocery store then a department store.

 

Ds had a summer job in 2014. He has been trying ever since that one ended to get another job, either temporary or long term. He'll take whatever he can get, but he can't get anything. For now his "job" is being a senior and taking dual enrollment classes, but I really want him to learn how to balance school and work. If only there were jobs available for young people in my city, he could get that experience. 

[Jenny in Florida]

My daughter worked the front desk at a couple of dance studios. The first one was an informal, unpaid "internship," that gave her experiences and free dance classes. From there, she transitioned to a regular paid position at a different school, where she also taught acting classes for kids. As soon as she turned 18, she got a job as a character performer at a local resort. 

 

My son has done some paying performance gigs over the last few years. Last summer, he taught a few classes at his "home base" dance studio. Nowadays, he's working part-time in the prop and costume shop at his college. Next year, when he'll be 18, he's considering applying to be an RA in his dorm.

[Scarlett]

This attitude to driving is something that demographers have noticed - it is particularly associated with millenials, but it seems to apply generally to the generations that have been abandoning suburbs for cities.

 

As a group they just don't seem to really be interested in cars - they don't particularly see them as a sign of any real achievement or that a nice car reflects on their social status, and they don't seem to particularly enjoy driving.

 

A lot of it seems to be tied up in the desire to live in communities where work and shops and such are closer. I suspect awareness of environmental issues may be part of it, and the cost of maintaining and insuring - they can in many ways tie you down as much as they can give freedom. They may associate cars with long commutes.

 

My husband thinks part of it is that cars are not all that fun to drive - city driving tends to be tedious and in North America the cars are almost all automatics.

 

I began noticing this attitude when my ds was quite young. Sure enough as he got closer to permit age he was all meh about it. I was having none of that nonsense. I bought the drivers Ed course and told him it was to be completed by the time he turned 15 1/2 ( the age he could,get his permit). He did work on it and the longer he worked on it the more excited he got. The day he turned 15 1/2 he was totally stressed because he felt h couldn't pass the test. I told him not to worry he could delay it for a week or so. Oh no. He was by then DETERMINED to get his permit on 15 1/2 day.

 

So a little prodding goes a long way.

[Bluegoat]

I began noticing this attitude when my ds was quite young. Sure enough as he got closer to permit age he was all meh about it. I was having none of that nonsense. I bought the drivers Ed course and told him it was to be completed by the time he turned 15 1/2 ( the age he could,get his permit). He did work on it and the longer he worked on it the more excited he got. The day he turned 15 1/2 he was totally stressed because he felt h couldn't pass the test. I told him not to worry he could delay it for a week or so. Oh no. He was by then DETERMINED to get his permit on 15 1/2 day.

 

So a little prodding goes a long way.

 

I might encourage my kids to learn because it frees up my time, but I don't really care otherwise if they are excited by driving.  If they are largely self-sufficient for transportation, which i suppose will largely depend on where we live, they don't ever have to learn to drive as far as I am concerned.

[Scarlett]

I might encourage my kids to learn because it frees up my time, but I don't really care otherwise if they are excited by driving. If they are largely self-sufficient for transportation, which i suppose will largely depend on where we live, they don't ever have to learn to drive as far as I am concerned.

Right. Rural OK sort of demands one learns to drive. Not only that I view driving as a life skill.