Years ago when I worked in a state hospital, the standard (cheap) treatment for foot and toenail fungus both was footbaths in strong black tea.

Based on recommendations here, I picked up (and finished) A Quaker Book of Wisdom. What a lovely read, like sitting down for the afternoon with tea and an elder relative or mentor and listening to them riff on life. I am familiar with Quaker belief and culture already, but enjoyed the reminder and the particular spin. The Quaker's have such great phrasing: Let your life speak, where way opens, that of God in every person. I have a child headed to a Quaker university in the fall and I am personally hoping to find a way to attend a nearby retreat center for a few days.

Life is too short not to be an embarrassment. 😆

I have a book related question that someone here might be able to help with. I am looking for a book which covers the neurology of adolescence to use in a human development class for high school students. I read The Teenage Brain: A Neuroscientist's Guide to Raising Adolescents and Young Adults. Loved the information. But the tone: Ouch. The author geared it to parents and I found it condescending. I am concerned the students will find it patronizing and respond with snark rather than learning the material. Anyone have a better suggestion?

High five, Kareni.

Martian goes hiking. Gets left bit by bit on trail. He's badass like that.

I work a part time job not traditionally thought to be family friendly but I have a measure of control over my hours and it's specialized enough to pay well. High hourly pay is the ultimate in family friendliness because you don't have to work many hours provided you manage not to get caught up in the rat race. My own experience has led.me to think much more broadly for my own daughter. If she enjoys the schooling and training, the investment may be worth it even for a part time career.

Interesting, regenetrude. Thanks for typing that out. At the time we lived in Norway we had an elderly family member living with us and it was not the cultural norm. Most elderly Norwegians lived independent of families with plans for long term care in care communities in place. It was considered strange to have an elderly person who planned to stay with the family forever. It is interesting to me the European concept of a professional. I am likely way over generalizing, but they seem to have specific training for jobs that here in the US would be more DIY. For example, my husband is an engineer but good with construction and he has done all kinds of construction that most Europeans would find strange. Even early childcare is professionalized in a way it is not in the US. (Licensing for day care in the US is typically more about health and safety, less about educational credentials of the teachers.) Except for house cleaning. Not a professional job. The lines between the two seem fairly arbitrary to me. Because I can think of many jobs of about the same skill level that are professionalized. Really, I think the issue is that with high labor costs, it's just not the norm.

It depends on the kind of law. I am not an attorney but work in legal world and know several women who have made it work. They are often self employed and avoid corporate work.

Question for regenetrude. I heard similar ideas when I lived in Norway. The idea being that people should do their own cooking, cleaning, laundry etc. Yet, they were quick to outsource elder care and care of disabled children because there were viable options not available here in the US. How does this jive? It's an interesting paradox where self care is prioritized but care for others is encouraged to be done by professionals. Not sure how this works in Germany?

I don't share this guilt at all (and yes I do scrub my own toilets). To me it is no different than eating out (someone has to wash those dishes!) or getting a pedicure. (I hate the thought of a pedicure and have never had one, but would scrubbing someone else's feet be inherently demeaning?) I can't think of much work that I would find inherently demeaning PROVIDED the worker is compensated fairly and provided safe working conditions. It is perfectly legitimate to choose to spend your time elsewhere. Otherwise we would all.be involved in large scale food production and knitting our own socks.

My perspective is that if you hire help and pay well, you are providing a job. :-D In some cultures, not providing the job would be selfish.

An investment account and a prenup?

Well, most parts of the US don't have a climate suitable for pomegranate and citrus. I try not to rub it in. I laughed at your potato growing story, btw. Growing potatoes is a big hairy deal in dh's Midwestern family. Planting must happen on St. Patrick's Day. And it must be above ground, covered in straw. You can then tell everybody you "made garden." Months later, one bag of seed potatoes yields one bag at harvest. I loved The Martian, but the potato growing part was not plausible. :-D

When we landscaped our yard, we focused on fruit and nut trees. Because California. I will say those have been more cost effective than most crops grown in the garden, especially pomegranate, Meyer lemon, pistachio, and cherry. I suspect asparagus would be cost effective as well, because it's another one you plant once.

Yes, berries! Berries are usually worth it.

I am in CA and can purchase high quality produce year round. Where I save money is herbs: cilantro, basil, Thai basil, lemon grass, epazote, etc. No need for great dirt. No need for expensive seed--they take off on their own, mostly, from previous years.

I laughed at this. Um, yeah. I met dh when out to lunch in a strange city with a cousin and her then fiancé's friends. Within hours of meeting, he circled back to pick me up for a date. This was pre cellphone days, which meant he had to go through the motel switchboard to track me down. We did wait 2.5 years to marry, living in separate states. But it is astonishing how little we mapped out. Because, eh. We were in love. Everything else was details.

This is an excellent point. Jurisdiction matters. In the several states I have worked professionally, CPS doesn't have the authority to investigate either educational neglect or truancy as a stand alone complaint. Generally that goes to the truancy officer or law enforcement with CPS only pulled in if the situation is verified and then not rectified.

I have not read all the replies. I am in CA and am a mandated reporter as well. However, educational neglect does not fall under mandated reporting statutes in my state. Meaning, if I were to encounter this family in a professional setting, I could not break confidentiality in order to report. I suppose a lay person or friend could call CPS, but it doesn't fall under the state CPS mandate unless there is other abuse or severe physical neglect. People tend to think that law says xyz because it should, but that's not the case.

If it makes you feel any better, I unthinkingly brought my then 9 year old daughter along to an appointment with a surgeon for a much younger brother who needed a surgery for a severe functional defect in his nether regions. It was 75 minutes of diagrams, photos, and very blunt conversation. Oy. Mother of the year. She thinks it's hilarious. Now. At the time she left with her eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

AFAIK all the men drafted in my family served as conscientious objectors. Same with my husband's family. There were quite a few: grandfather, great uncle, uncle, father-in-law, husband's uncle. The common CO jobs during WWII and Vietnam were in state psych hospitals or large medical centers. We have taught our children that if a draft is in place, don't run away. Serve in accordance with your conscience. Of course, their conscience is ultimately up to them.

I did a Judy Blume Fudge-fest with my younger kids a few months back. It felt...decadent? Pure fun.

I've been missing for a few weeks, waylaid by a job change, end of year homeschooling busyness, a graduating senior, and general exhaustion. But. This weekend I have slept plenty and my schedule is looking much lighter and more manageable for the next few months. Relief. Life is not meant to be lived that quickly. As far as what I have been reading... With my younger kids, we read Carry On Mr. Bowditch for school, followed by several books about the Lewis and Clark Expedition. We are currently reading Little House in the Big Woods, half heartedly, and The Birchbark House, with a little more gusto. My own personal reading has been focused on medical nonfiction. I finished Inheritance, about the interplay between genes and life. For me it was a much needed updating to my genetic knowledge, and timely because we are starting to have our kids tested for specific clotting disorders. (First child tested, my daughter, was positive for one but not other.) I enjoyed Cure: A Journey Into the Science of Mind and Body by Jo Marchant. I highly recommend to anyone interested in the latest mind-body research and particularly how it applies to chronic pain, anxiety and depression, autoimmune disorders, chronic stress, etc. Marchant has a nice, steady, approachable writing style. I am currently reading The Teenage Brain and Being Mortal to possibly use in a Human Development psych class I am considering teaching to high school homeschoolers. I taught AP psych to homeschoolers last year and it was a wonderful experience.

I hate hate hate to shop and have almost no fashion sense. An acquaintance suggested Christopher & Banks when I needed an inexpensive professional wardrobe. So I took my clothing budget, went to the store and found a sales clerk probably 20 years old than me who was very stylishly dressed. Normally having a clerk help me freaks me out too but maybe because she was older??? IDK. I tried on strictly for fit and comfort and let her say thumbs up or down for style. I am still happy with those clothes. I am tall so this particular store might not work for you, but the general concept might.