not doing sports?

[mamabear2three]

My ODD just turned 5. She is extremely active, loves playing princess, dancing to music, playing outside, riding her bike, swinging, etc. We as a family are a bit strapped financially - my husband works two jobs so that we can afford for me to stay home with our three kids, (ages 5, 2 and 3 months). His first job is a music teacher in a public elementary school. He got his first raise in 5 years this year. his second job is part time at a retail store - working two nights a week and every Saturday.

 

One of ODD's friends takes ballet and while ODD has never asked to do that (we couldn't afford it right now anyways) my mom mentioned to me that she was considering paying for it for her. I talked to her about it a few days ago then today when I talked to her again, she brought it back up, saying that she thinks that DD is more of a soccer type of girl, and that soccer is cheaper anyways so we could pay for it ourselves.

 

I told her that I didn't care about the ballet but that I wasn't going to do soccer right now because it's not fair to DD to never be able to have her dad at a game, since the games are all on Saturdays. (not to mention the fact that my parents are on their boat every Saturday and so I would be alone, taking all the kids to the games without any help, which I am sure I could do, but i don't want to right now.)

 

My mom started immediately saying that I am wrong to say that, lots of jobs have dad's working on Saturday and that I can't keep her out of sports forever because dad works on Saturdays. I responded that Dad won't be working the second job forever - we need to bridge a $600 gap, whether paying off debts or in raises. She just kept saying that it's wrong to not put her in sports because dad works on Saturday... I finally told her that I wouldn't be doing anything for at least a year, and I would think about it again after a year. Then I changed the subject, but she obviously was still not happy.

 

Is that unreasonable of me? I grew up doing soccer, baseball, swimming and lacrosse but my dad was at all my games, and I have precious memories of my dad always being there. I just don't get what my mom's deal is, especially since my DD is only 5!

[Cindy in FL.]

She's still very young. I don't think that there is any reason for her to have to be in sports right now. There will be plenty of time for that later. You need to do what is best for your family.

 

When things like this have come up in our lives, I gently let the person know that we spend time discussing/thinking/praying about decisions before making them. I hope that they will respect that and give us the benefit of the doubt, but if they don't agree that's fine with me. I also make it clear that it is no longer up for discussion if they push it.

[lovinmyboys]

I definitely do not think a 5yo needs to play sports. I can also completely understand your not wanting to drag everyone there by yourself. However, I don't think a child needs their father there to make it a valuable activity. My DH hardly ever goes to my kids games (though he would like to). I have to chase a 1yr old and 3yr old around so I rarely watch the games either. I guess that has never factored into my decisions regarding activities.

 

My mom also put me in lots of activities and she does suggest to me often that she wants my kids to have those opportunities. She has paid for a few activities for them as well. At least in our case, she really is trying to help. When I don't want to do the activity I just tell her that it won't work right now and I will let her know if something changes.

 

Don't feel pressure that your dd needs any activity right now. She doesn't. But, if your only reason for not doing it is that her dad won't get to watch, then I personally don't think that should stop you.

[Parrothead]

As a mom with a kid who sucked at sports, I say your mom is nuts. I grew up not playing sports and turned out okay. Definitely not a sports family here.

 

Dd does dance, and I run and do yoga and tai chi. I see my activities as exercise, not sports.

[fairfarmhand]

2 of my dd;s did gymnastics for a few years but currently, there's no sports happening here.

 

Dh never did sports other than the backyard variety.

 

It is FINE that your family doesn't do sports.

 

It is FINE that you don;t want to be the only one dragging all of the kids to ball games on Saturday.

 

Your mama needs to mind her own business, if she's wanting to pressure you into sports.

 

If she's just trying to be helpful, thank her and tell her no, it won't work for the family.

[Ali in OR]

You definitely don't need to be doing sports at age 5, especially if your daughter is active in other ways. My youngest is very athletic--naturally likes to run and do everything. I feel it's important to give her lots of opportunity to be active (soccer, ballet, running 5ks). But she didn't start soccer until age 7, almost 8. She took to it naturally and is on a club team now. So she didn't miss anything by not starting at age 5. Since you grew up doing soccer, you could get her a little size 3 soccer ball and teach her to pass with you in the backyard, or dribble through cones, kick it against the garage, etc. Soccer is definitely a cheaper sport than ballet. And I would agree that Dad doesn't always have to be there. If she eventually likes soccer and does club, there will be Sunday games too. Oh, and scholarships are available at least in our club. I actually enjoy going to soccer games--they're fun and not too long. Lots of younger sibs run around and play.

[amsunshine]

Isn't the soccer at 5 years old really just "bumble bee" soccer anyway? I agree it's a bit early to start thinking about pushing sports. On the other hand, swimming lessons might be a good idea (if you haven't done it already) -- just because swimming is an important life skill. But again, totally not a necessity to push swimming as a sport at 5. Also, ballet at 5 is really not necessary either. Sure, the classes are fun, but at that age, the only classes available are "pre-ballet" classes. The girls might do some gentle stretching and skipping around to music--no actual ballet instruction will start until around 6 or 7 yrs.

[LibraryLover]

The only reason to do soccer at 5 is for the adorable factor. Same for dance, One of my daughters didn't dance, and my youngest only started at age 10. When I see the little ones skipping on the stage in their sweet little tutus, I get a pang of wishing we'd started early. (Although at 10, my dd went into ballet with intention and attention to detail and progressed very quickly. Maybe if we had started younger, she wouldn't have worked so hard? I don't know.)

 

If a child is really active and wants to play, it's fine, and at that age, the parents are still chill. It's very friendly. I always enjoyed those Sat morns on the town field. It's possible your dh could attend some practices at times, maybe between showings etc? I didn't go to every practice. Sometimes dh went, and sometimes I went, and sometimes we went together. Our youngest was a steamroller on the field; our most competitive child. She was a lot of fun to watch. Super cute, too. lol

 

I don't think it's 'necessary' at 5.

 

I agree with the suggestion of swimming lessons. That's an important skill to develop, although you don't need classes.

[mamabear2three]

Thanks ladies - I think I would like for her to get experience playing a team sport, but this is just not a time in my life that I feel adding the stress of having to do it alone would help anything. I think I would rather wait until she is a little older, then she could be able to take more responsibility for it as well.

[Arcadia]

My boys are slightly older and sports seems to be another codename for socialization here. I get asked sometimes if they are in cub soccer or other team sports. My kids are interested in golf and bowling, not much of socialization aspect there.

[jennynd]

 

Yeah I once talked to a guy who coached little kids through soccer and he said it was a lot like herding cats. hehe

 

:lol:

 

DD5 had her 1st game couple weeks ago. DH said half of the kids were standing there crying and half hr later, only half of the kids left

[Georgiana Daniels]

There's no absolute NEED for a kid to start a sport at 5, but....if your daughter WANTS to, I'd find a way to do it.

 

My hubby works 60-80 hours a week and often has to miss the kids' meets, tournaments, etc., but would never suggest the kids not do their activity for that reason. It's a great way for kids to make friends, get some fresh air, discover an activity they love and get some exercise. There are good reasons for kids to start sports early :) If, however, the whole idea of playing a sport is only because grandma wants her to, then I'd put it off until you feel more comfortable. You know what's best for your family.

[Mom in High Heels]

We are not sporty people at all. AT ALL. James Bond likes to play the occasional game of basketball or flag football at PT, but nothing formal. Indy sucks at group sports and I am NOT into sports in any way shape or form. Indy wants to take fencing when we move, but that's not a team sport. I don't see a problem with your dd not being in sports. And remember, she's your child, not your mother's.

[twoxcell]

Isn't the soccer at 5 years old really just "bumble bee" soccer anyway? I agree it's a bit early to start thinking about pushing sports. On the other hand, swimming lessons might be a good idea (if you haven't done it already) -- just because swimming is an important life skill. But again, totally not a necessity to push swimming as a sport at 5. Also, ballet at 5 is really not necessary either. Sure, the classes are fun, but at that age, the only classes available are "pre-ballet" classes. The girls might do some gentle stretching and skipping around to music--no actual ballet instruction will start until around 6 or 7 yrs.

:iagree:

I would look into summer swim lessons. Also around here real soccer starts at Kindergarten age and they play REAL games. The Y offers soccer for 3-5 year olds but it is mostly for the parents I think. Most of the kids stand around(well mine did anyways :lol: ).

[Arcadia]

Actually bowling can be quite social.

My hubby and I used to hang out at bowling alleys with our friends. However my kids are more interested in getting a strike than the social aspect at the moment. Kind of like the way they play billards, more for getting the ball in than socialising.

[Luanne]

I'm sorry, but I don't understand the push these days to get kids involved in so many activities (sports included) at the ages of 4 and 5. I'm not saying they shouldn't be involved in anything, but kids have little time to just be kids and not be going here and there all the time. I loved my childhood. I did play sports, but not until I was about 9 and then only one activity at a time.

[Ellie]

My ODD just turned 5. She is extremely active, loves playing princess, dancing to music, playing outside, riding her bike, swinging, etc. We as a family are a bit strapped financially - my husband works two jobs so that we can afford for me to stay home with our three kids, (ages 5, 2 and 3 months). His first job is a music teacher in a public elementary school. He got his first raise in 5 years this year. his second job is part time at a retail store - working two nights a week and every Saturday.

 

One of ODD's friends takes ballet and while ODD has never asked to do that (we couldn't afford it right now anyways) my mom mentioned to me that she was considering paying for it for her. I talked to her about it a few days ago then today when I talked to her again, she brought it back up, saying that she thinks that DD is more of a soccer type of girl, and that soccer is cheaper anyways so we could pay for it ourselves.

 

I told her that I didn't care about the ballet but that I wasn't going to do soccer right now because it's not fair to DD to never be able to have her dad at a game, since the games are all on Saturdays. (not to mention the fact that my parents are on their boat every Saturday and so I would be alone, taking all the kids to the games without any help, which I am sure I could do, but i don't want to right now.)

 

My mom started immediately saying that I am wrong to say that, lots of jobs have dad's working on Saturday and that I can't keep her out of sports forever because dad works on Saturdays. I responded that Dad won't be working the second job forever - we need to bridge a $600 gap, whether paying off debts or in raises. She just kept saying that it's wrong to not put her in sports because dad works on Saturday... I finally told her that I wouldn't be doing anything for at least a year, and I would think about it again after a year. Then I changed the subject, but she obviously was still not happy.

 

Is that unreasonable of me? I grew up doing soccer, baseball, swimming and lacrosse but my dad was at all my games, and I have precious memories of my dad always being there. I just don't get what my mom's deal is, especially since my DD is only 5!

 

 

ITA with your mother. Yes, it is unreasonable of you.

 

If you think your dd would enjoy soccer, let her do soccer. If not, don't. Surely your dd will have other precious memories of her father.

[xixstar]

The two younger children sound reason enough to skip it. And that is because my oldest played soccer competitively and the hours on the side of the field for practice and games with an infant and toddler were kinda awful. Didn't enjoy it and hated games that I attended alone with the little ones. Atleast then it was for a 14yo that did want to play, not a younger child just looking for an activity.

[Murphy101]

As far as I'm concerned if she is under 10, it's not worth it unless there's some health reason to force her into a more active whatever. I put my oldests in soccer and such at that age and now won't with my youngers. There's no point to it or long term benefit that I can see from my limited experience.

[Joanne]

Having done the bulk of stuff with my 3 closely spaced kids alone, I don't agree with your reasons.

 

But they are yours and you are entitled to them.

 

I certainly don't think a 5 year old "needs" sports. But I do believe that kids growing up in 2013 western culture need to participate in some organized activities throughout childhood.

 

[twoxcell]

As far as I'm concerned if she is under 10, it's not worth it unless there's some health reason to force her into a more active whatever. I put my oldests in soccer and such at that age and now won't with my youngers. There's no point to it or long term benefit that I can see from my limited experience.

 

The benefits would be exercise, fun, skill building, and learning to work together as a team.

[Spy Car]

I think it is a great idea to have a 5 year old on a soccer team, if you can manage it. If you simply can't it is understandable, but not ideal IMO.

 

Kids getting out and getting exercise and having fun meeting a bunch of other kids is a good thing, no matter how much anti-athleticism is promoted on this forum. And playing with and meeting new kids on teams is good thing too despite the "socialization" arguments one hears here.

 

If you are too strapped, you are too strapped. But....

 

Bill

[Murphy101]

Meh. Every single one of my kids has managed to get more than enough exercise, fun, skill building, and team work without sports. Sports wasn't necessary at all to make that happen.

 

If the kid just really loves it and wants to do it then I might if it worked out time and $ wise for the family. Because it doesn't have to be a need for a parent to do something for their kid.

[Pawz4me]

Perhaps I missed it, but I didn't see anything in your original post about what your daughter wants.

 

To me that should be the priority. Not what mom and/or grandma wants.

 

If she wants to play soccer, then I don't see why dad not being there would make any difference. 'Cause it really should be about *her* learning/playing the sport. Not about the parent. Sure it's great for parents to be at their kids' sports events as much as possible, but I've never personally known any child whose enjoyment of a sport hinged on their parents being present for every single game.

 

And if she doesn't want to play soccer that's fine, too. I'm not a believer in forcing kids to participate in team sports simply because the parent thinks it's beneficial. That's not fair to the kid or to the team.

[VeritasMama]

My husband travels about 50% of the time for work, all over the country. His paycheck is much higher than it would be if he had a more traditional 9-5 job, and we need the money. I also have 3 children in baseball this spring and summer, another ds also plays soccer in the fall and another ds also plays basketball in the winter. I am at a lot of games all by myself with the other kids, which includes two toddlers. This fall I am going to put my very active soon to be 3 year old into dance lessons, I know she would love it. I am also expecting number 7 this July.

 

I'm not saying everyone should be like me, if you really aren't in a place where you can handle it, then that is okay. I am no saint and I'm not the most patient person, but like homeschooling it is hard but you make it work for the sake of your kids. I'm sure that if this were really important to your daughter, you would find a way to do it.

 

I don't think kids NEED to be active in sports for parents to be doing a good job. I have ds who is a 2nd grader who has no interest in organized sports, he just is not the type of kid to enjoy team activities. I have never pushed him. He goes to a homeschool physical fitness class at one of the local family fitness centers, and he is an outdoorsy kid who loves to ride his bike, climb trees, and just play outside, so I know he gets enough activity. He also loves going to his brothers sporting events and playing with the siblings of the other kids on the team, it is a lot of fun for him.

 

My point is it isn't necessary to put your dd in a sport, especially at the age of 5. My kids only participate if they are interested. But I don't think you should let your husband being gone on Saturdays stand in the way if your child is really interested in sports.

[Georgiana Daniels]

I'm sorry, but I don't understand the push these days to get kids involved in so many activities (sports included) at the ages of 4 and 5. I'm not saying they shouldn't be involved in anything, but kids have little time to just be kids and not be going here and there all the time. I loved my childhood. I did play sports, but not until I was about 9 and then only one activity at a time.

 

There are tons of great reasons to get kids involved in activities--fun, learning, play, exercise...the list goes on. As to being involved in sports young, I used to agree with people who said there's no reason to start young, but my view has totally changed now that we've been involved in sports.

 

The thing is, when we all were growing up, you didn't need to start young. A kid could go out for a sport in 7th/8th grade and be fine. Competitive even. Go on to scholarships. But that's no longer the case. Because everyone is starting younger and younger, often by the time a kid reaches middle school, they simply can't compete. Certainly they can't if they wait until high school. And then it's REALLY no fun.

 

I'm not saying it's right, and I'm not saying there aren't exceptions to the above, but this has been my observation (and the observation of many coaches I know.)

[BarbecueMom]

 

 

:lol:

 

DD5 had her 1st game couple weeks ago. DH said half of the kids were standing there crying and half hr later, only half of the kids left

 

DS "played" soccer last fall, and out of 80 or so kids aged 4-6, he was the only one I ever saw crying and refusing to play. He wanted to try again this spring, but he just completely shuts down so we stopped going. It's a shame, because some of these games were really fun to watch! Maybe our league was just an anomaly, because all the other kids seemed to have fun.

 

At almost five, he can finally handle story time at the library, as long as he sits away from the other kids. He gets upset at every other organized activity involving other children. Playground or water park? Makes friends fine. Girl Scouts selling cookies? Tries to flirt his way into a free sample. Mommy and Me swim classes? Screaming and flailing. I don't get it.

[twoxcell]

Meh. Every single one of my kids has managed to get more than enough exercise, fun, skill building, and team work without sports. Sports wasn't necessary at all to make that happen.

 

If the kid just really loves it and wants to do it then I might if it worked out time and $ wise for the family. Because it doesn't have to be a need for a parent to do something for their kid.

That's great that your kids have learned those skills. ;) Some people and their kids choose to learn said skills through team sports. To each their own I suppose, but to say that there is no point for any child under 10 to play organized sports is just silly. I never said doing sports was a necessity.

[mamabear2three]

There's no absolute NEED for a kid to start a sport at 5, but....if your daughter WANTS to, I'd find a way to do it.

 

 

My daughter doesn't ask to do anything other than "can we get together wtih so and so?" so I am busy with lots of play dates for her. Whenever we find ourselves somewhere with other children, she is making friends. One time she asked me after leaving the play place at the mall if we could have lunch the next day with her new friend!

 

She has never asked to do soccer, or any sport, and whenever I try to teach her one (her other grandparents thought she should learn baseball at age 4 :lol: ) she gets all excited then fizzles in about 20 minutes (if she lasts that long) and never asks to do it again. she seems to enjoy running for the sake of running more than even riding her bike!

 

We will be doing a weekly coop starting in the fall and we get free tuition at a local day camp where my husband works during the summer and we allow her to go every other week all summer (so 4 weeks of camp).

 

She knows her friend takes ballet and she doesn't even ask to do that - she even has her own tutu and ballet slippers and will put them on and dance in front of a mirrored closet door we have in our dining room, but I'm not even sure she'd like the concept of someone telling her what to do for dance, it's just fun play.

 

If she were to start asking me to do something then yes, the situation would be significantly different and I would make it happen, but this is more my mom telling me she should do something that I don't want to deal with than my daughter asking to do something.

[twoxcell]

My daughter doesn't ask to do anything other than "can we get together wtih so and so?" so I am busy with lots of play dates for her. Whenever we find ourselves somewhere with other children, she is making friends. One time she asked me after leaving the play place at the mall if we could have lunch the next day with her new friend!

 

She has never asked to do soccer, or any sport, and whenever I try to teach her one (her other grandparents thought she should learn baseball at age 4 :lol: ) she gets all excited then fizzles in about 20 minutes (if she lasts that long) and never asks to do it again. she seems to enjoy running for the sake of running more than even riding her bike!

 

We will be doing a weekly coop starting in the fall and we get free tuition at a local day camp where my husband works during the summer and we allow her to go every other week all summer (so 4 weeks of camp).

 

She knows her friend takes ballet and she doesn't even ask to do that - she even has her own tutu and ballet slippers and will put them on and dance in front of a mirrored closet door we have in our dining room, but I'm not even sure she'd like the concept of someone telling her what to do for dance, it's just fun play.

 

If she were to start asking me to do something then yes, the situation would be significantly different and I would make it happen, but this is more my mom telling me she should do something that I don't want to deal with than my daughter asking to do something.

If she isn't interested then I wouldn't worry about it right now. She may never ask but may still enjoy it if you try it later on. I do not force my kids to play sports. I do require swim lessons because I consider that a life skill and a safety issue.

[J-rap]

Your daughter is only 5, and if she isn't interested in organized sports, why push it? I'd concentrate on keeping her happily active, doing things outside, riding her bike, playing at the park... you know, just fun childhood playing! It sounds like she's doing that already.

 

At some point (when she's a little older) you might want to expose her to a few things if she shows even just a little interest -- swimming or softball or whatever (or soccer :)). Sometimes kids don't know if they like a sport unless they try it.

 

Some of my kids enjoyed organized sports, and some didn't. We did try and expose them to different sports at one point or another, such as swimming, tennis, hockey, and soccer... but not at age 5. We always walked and hiked and rode bikes as a family though, so they did have that in them. By the time they were 18 or 19, even the ones who weren't involved in organized sports eventually got into working out or running on their own, just to keep fit and feel healthy.

 

One thing though -- one of my daughters has told me that she does wish I had at least taught she (or found someone else to teach she) basic skills of softball, volleyball, etc. At a lot of social functions a casual game of volleyball, for example, might be formed, but because my daughter never really learned the skills, she doesn't feel comfortable playing.

 

Also I wanted to add, I don't think it's a big deal if your husband can't be at the Saturday games if your daughter does choose to play eventually. I know some parents are always at every single game, but others aren't. We were not able to go to all the games and meets, but our children knew we supported them in spirit. :)

[mamabear2three]

I am looking at swimming lessons this summer also, I forgot to mention, because I agree with those of you who mention it's a life skill that's important for her to learn.

[Spy Car]

How is having a 5 year old playing soccer "pushing it?"

 

Thousands upon thousands of 5 year olds play soccer every year. It is hardly unusual.

 

Bill

[Luanne]

She is 5. If she doesn't want to play soccer right now, she shouldn't be forced to.

[twoxcell]

I am looking at swimming lessons this summer also, I forgot to mention, because I agree with those of you who mention it's a life skill that's important for her to learn.

I think this will be perfect. I start all of my kids in swim lessons at 4 regardless of interest. :)

 

How is having a 5 year old playing soccer "pushing it?"

 

Thousands upon thousands of 5 year olds play soccer every year. It is hardly unusual.

I agree with this too. Unless she is completely against the idea I think it is fine to sign her up for soccer even if she doesn't ask. Spring season is already underway so you would have to wait until fall or next spring anyways so revisit the idea then. ;)

[twoxcell]

She is 5. If she doesn't want to play soccer right now, she shouldn't be forced to.

She said she has never asked, she did not say she didn't want to. There is a big difference between not asking and being totally against it. Some kids don't ask but they still like it when they try it. I don't think it is necessary to FORCE a 5 year old to play sports but it is fine to expose them to things they haven't considered.

[Spy Car]

She is 5. If she doesn't want to play soccer right now, she shouldn't be forced to.

 

Huh????

 

Bill

[Kathryn]

If her father not being there for HER were your only reason, I'd say to think about it some more. But, with you having to handle a 2yo and 3mo on your own there and having financial concerns, I think you can definitely wait a year or two. Or maybe mom can pay AND take her? But then, I agree with John Rosemond on the whole young children and adult-organized sports thing.

[LMV]

I think there is a lot more to this than your husband's work schedule.

 

-If you can't manage soccer right now and also manage to meet her little siblings needs then I think it is fine to say we just can't do this right now. Why don't we re-evaluate next season, year, etc.

-If she doesn't want to play soccer then I would not force her. However, I don't think playing soccer at five is necessarily too early depending on the child. We are allowing our three year old to play on a very informal 5 & under team this summer (mainly because our oldest will be volunteer coaching with this team and I want to give her the opportunity to play with her adored big sister who will be going off to college and the wonderful world of D1 soccer in the fall) but we are allowing not requiring and I think that is key.

-In an ideal world parents would make it to every sporting event, art show, class play, and recital. In reality sometimes life gets in the way of that. One of our daughters just finished up her L10 gymnastics season at JO Nationals this morning. My husband and my mom and stepfather were there cheering her on. I stayed home because physician staffing has gotten tight in the ED recently and I really needed to work Wednesday and yesterday and because my husband and accepted that bringing our four year old foster daughter to this meet would be a traumatic and miserable experience for her and we couldn't do that so someone had to stay home with her. My husband missed several of our oldest daughter's soccer tournaments during the period he was living out of state so her sister could attend a partial day program for PTSD and there have been other missed moments. Our kids know we love them, we support them and we do the best we can.

-If your core reason for saying no is that you feel it will be devastating for your daughter to play if dad isn't at every game I might encourage you to rethink that. I played soccer formally on a team from age six on through college. My dad made it to the games he could but he worked very hard and was in a profession where he sometimes had to go in to work on the weekends if there was a problem. He missed some soccer games as a result but I never doubted his love or support. Sometimes it was more fun to tell him about a game when he didn't know the ending.

[freesia]

I am in agreement with most folks.

 

If the primary reason for not doing this is your husband not being there, I wouldn't worry about that at all. My dh works Sundays and most of the time cannot make my sons games. He comes when he can. I couldn't make my daughter's volleyball game without a lot of stress today. I told her if it meant a lot to her, I would come. She said, no, that she didn't care one way or the other. Her dad was taking her. So, it may not matter to her at all. She will have other happy memories of her dad. Furthermore, honestly, it is unlikely she will remember whether he was at her games when she was five.

 

However, I found it stressful to do sports while watching littles. If it feels like too much, I'd wait a year and revisit the question.

[mamabear2three]

 

However, I found it stressful to do sports while watching littles. If it feels like too much, I'd wait a year and revisit the question.

 

 

I think this is what it actually boils down to. I just keep thinking that when my husband is with me, certain things are just a lot easier. I am quite adept at taking the whole gang someplace - but the idea of doing a sport, and everything that would go along with it right now, just feels like too much. But I am also still not getting a full night's sleep...

 

In all actuality, it's a mute point right now, as someone mentioned - this season is already in full swing so I will just wait and revisit next season. As the little ones grow it will get easier for me too.

[Forget-Me-Not]

Your kids are all VERY young. Don't stress about it. Things will probably change significantly in many ways in just a year or two. She will mature, her interests will change, all three will get easier, etc.

[LMD]

Um, you have a 3 month old?! Relax, your DD will not be scarred for life if she's not in organised sports by her 6th birthday. For whatever reason you want - you don't need to justify it. But then, we're not a sporty family (we do exercise together as a family regularly) so it would be waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down low on my priority list, and I know my DD would have hated it - just her personality.

[Dahliarw]

I HATED soccer as a kid because my parents put me in it when I was 5 and I just wasn't ready for it. I was incredibly shy, not at all athletic, etc. I hated it with a passion. I still don't enjoy it, but I can tolerate it. Had I started a few years later when I was ready, I might have liked it. (Ironically, I really wanted to go gymnastics, but parents wouldn't let me because of cost and the fact that my dad though leotards are not modest enough (though wearing a leo was not required)).

 

When I was 8 I started softball and LOVED it. I was older, had friends on the team, and was interested in it. I played through Jr. High. Then I got into cross country which I loved as well.

 

I think it really depends on the child. You can ask about things and follow her interests if you want her in an activity. The only "sport" or "activity" I force on my kids is swim lessons, and that's a safety issue for me more than anything. Once they can swim well enough, they can quit. No expectations of swim team or anything.

 

That being said, I have 3 kids. My oldest (8 now) was never really into sports. Enjoyed tee ball at 5, and played little league 2 more years, but it wasn't all that important to him though he wanted to do it. When he didn't want to do it this year we didnt' argue. He really enjoys gymnastics, so he does that, as well as flag football every so often.

 

Now my 5 yo LOVES LOVES LOVES sports. He's done tee ball and soccer and asks to play other sports. It's what he's into and loves. He'll even sit through a 3 1/2 hour MLB game or 90 minute pro soccer match, paying attention, keeping score, etc. My 8yo doesn't even do that! He's the one I have to limit to one sport at a time!

 

My 3yo is up in the air. Right now she loves gymnastics and is trying out for the select (pre-team) classes. But if she decides it's not her thing, I have no problem with her not stopping. She mainly started because she was climbing everything at home and swinging on the banister, so I wanted a safe place for her to climb, swing, etc.

 

They are all different. I think interest plays a huge role in readiness as well. I also believe you have to balance family and personal needs with what a child wants.

[Murphy101]

I actually agree with georgianna about how starting younger as created a competitive edge that starting later is hard to over come.

 

And a parent who is worried about that will likely not wait until later.

 

I'm not worried about it bc we could not care less if our kids ever play a sport. They play rec stuff once in a while and seem happy enough. They like golf. Play some football and soccer in the street or field. *shrug* seem happy enough to me.

 

I don't mind if other people put their kids in sports. Whatever they want. They have their own kids and I have mine.

 

I do mind the presumption that one must have kids in scouts and sports at age 5 and up.

[mamabear2three]

 

I do mind the presumption that one must have kids in scouts and sports at age 5 and up.

 

that's my mom. And I am the poster child for her b/c I parent very differently from my sil and am homeschooling and have taught my kids to eat healthy and to mind me... but I guess I am failing in the area of sports... :glare:

[LibraryLover]

I think it's easy to dismiss sports if you consider yourself an 'intellectual', but I do think activity is very important. I also respect activities which are community based. I want to see kids moving. If they don't like soccer, take family walks, go biking or hiking, but it's nice if there are others from your area sharing in that..

 

If you don't like town/city sports, provide something else; riding, dance, gymnastics. Something. I think our culture makes it too easy to be sedentary. I also think the hsing community typically rejects group sports. I don't think that's good. Take it kid by kid, need by need.

 

My boys loved town baseball, and my girls were very into riding for a time, although it never became a passion. I am very glad I exposed them to various activities.

[Spy Car]

I think it's easy to dismiss sports if you consider yourself an 'intellectual', but I do think activity is very important. I also respect activities which are community based. I want to see kids moving. If they don't like soccer, take family walks, go biking or hiking, but it's nice if there are others from your area sharing in that..

 

If you don't like town/city sports, provide something else; riding, dance, gymnastics. Something. I think our culture makes it too easy to be sedentary. I also think the hsing community typically rejects group sports. I don't think that's good. Take it kid by kid, need by need.

 

My boys loved town baseball, and my girls were very into riding for a time, although it never became a passion. I am very glad I exposed them to various activities.

 

 

Great post.

 

One addition I would make is that it has been the "classical ideal," from the time of the ancient Greek until now, to be both an intellectual and an athlete. As a community presumably devoted to "classical education" it strikes me as strange that so many don't see a well-trained body in the same light they view a well-trained mind.

 

Both are critical aspects to be cultivated from my perspective, and that is inline with classical tradition.

 

Bill

[Guest vickib662]

When my daughter was 5 and briefly in soccer, she mostly chased butterflies and picked dandelions. Soccer can wait!

[Karmiel]

Unless you're trying to get an elite gymnast or ice skater, sports can wait. Many kids prefer bicycles and climbing trees, and not all people are competitive. It's fine. Actually, I think it would be insane to break your budget for such an activity. Trees and rolling down hills are free ... unless you're in a desert. Good luck! Parental pressure is no joy.