Im hosting a movie night for my neighborhood. The attendees are all women in their 30s-50s. Lots of us have only sons, so we are looking for girly movies (something my boys probably wouldn’t really want to watch). I was thinking My Best Friends Wedding. I haven’t seen it in forever and I just heard a song that reminded me of it. Or Father of the Bride? I haven’t watched many movies so I’m sure there are good ones I have never seen or heard of.

I love thinking about goals. Unfortunately I don’t always love accomplishing them. My April goals are pretty boring- spring clean the house, make sure we have enough food and medicine stocked for a week, and finish taxes.

Thank you for linking that!

Yes I think whatever it is is causing real suffering. I wonder if they have studied anything more with the mass psychogenic illness. Like were the incidents more likely within a week of a briefing. Was it in friend groups? I can understand that happening in Havana when people were hearing about it regularly. But several of them seem to be one random person in Vienna or Vietnam. The other weird thing to me is if it is the Russians why they would target a random diplomat’s wife doing laundry. And she has actual physical symptoms that required surgery so it isn’t psychogenic. Maybe hers is just a coincidence?

Has anyone read the new super long article about Havana syndrome/ anomalous health events? Or watched the 60 minutes episode? I don’t know what to think. I had pretty much decided there was nothing to it, because I don’t like to think of myself as a conspiracy type person and I believed the intelligence assessment and doctors who studied it. But this article did persuade me a little. The article didn’t address the scientific plausibility of such a weapon, which seems like a significant issue. Also, I would think most diplomats/CIA have worked on Russia stuff at some point in their careers, so the fact that everyone targeted had Russia in common wasn’t too convincing. I think the part that convinced me the most was the people promoting the article- they are knowledgeable and not prone to writing outlandish things. Has anyone else followed this story?

Have so much fun! You sound prepared. I usually make sure to have passport, phone, and charger and anything else I forget I can buy or borrow.

I associate “should have known what you were getting into” with my army reserve wife days. I hated when people said that to me- because I absolutely did not know what I was getting into. Dh was in the reserves and 9/11 hadnt happened at the beginning. I especially hated it when he deployed and I was pregnant and had ds2. Maybe I should have known, but I don’t think you can really understand the military until you have lived it. And those post 9/11 years used the reserves much more than had been used in any recent history. I don’t think anyone would really know what they are getting into marrying a royal.

Some of these I still need to learn! I have never sewn anything in my life. I also don’t really know much about a car- changing a tire or jumping it, but I do think I know the warning lights now (or at least how to google what it is). I have four boys between the ages of 12-17. They are all in a weird mix of very independent and helpless. My 3 older kids could be left home alone for a week and would manage fine as long as money was no issue (I’m sure they would Uber eats half of their meals). They can take care of themselves, but it wouldn’t be the way I would like. They all make their own haircut appointments, buy their own clothes, take public transport or ride their bike places, walk to the grocery store and make easy meals. My 14yr old and 15yr olds regularly babysit. I can’t think of the things they can’t do right now, but they regularly don’t know how to do simple things. ETA: my 14yr old just went to get his laundry out of the dryer and said they were still wet. I asked if he had cleaned out the vent because my clothes are always dry after the dryer cycle. He said he did then told me he pulled them out of the washer early (during the spin cycle) because he wanted to go to bed early. So I’m sure he put a full load of soaked clothes in the dryer. He has been doing his own laundry for 2 years. So he mostly has basic laundry skills but also still learning.

Great job to your dd! So interesting that his wife forgot about his diabetes. A couple of years ago my son collapsed on the baseball field. When I called 911 the operator asked if he had any known medical issues and I said no. She then went on to ask if he had allergies, epilepsy, diabetes. I am ashamed to admit I yelled “I said he has no medical condition quit asking me about medical conditions.” She kind of just ignored me and kept asking questions. I guess it makes sense that people may forget important things in an emergency. (My son was totally fine. It turned out he had gotten hit in the neck with a ball and I guess where it hit him caused his blood pressure to drop and he fainted.)

We just left Rome and witnessed 3 people get their wallets stolen (one guy got his back). I felt very safe there, but absolutely they have tons of pickpockets there. It is a real issue. All 3 times were at the termini metro station. My husband kept our money/ids in a crossbody bag under his clothes. I told my kids to keep their hand on their phones in the metro. Once when I was in the metro I had just gotten on and a police officer on the outside pointed to teen girls and gave me a gesture to keep an eye on them.

Aww. Very cute! I have a son turning 12 this weekend. My friend invited me to go to the zoo on February 28th of 2012 and I said no because I was worried the walking would send me into labor haha.

We are going around and around about this. Our top choice is Minneapolis, but we have to be in a big city. I think some other places in Minnesota and Michigan would be nice. Sometimes I look at the map of the US and just feel overwhelmed because the places I would want to live aren’t affordable. I asked this question awhile ago and some people did warn me that Minneapolis maybe isn’t too welcoming to newcomers. ETA: outside the US maybe Austria? I’ve only visited but I have several friends who lived there and it seems lovely. Or Portugal sounds nice too.

I’m just trying to organize our medicine drawer and then one area of the pantry. I have book club tonight and have to make dessert for that.

I decided to organize our medicines today and I am having trouble deciding what to do. Do you throw away expired medicine? It seems the consensus is that medicine works much longer than its expiration date. I have some from 2016 which I am embarrassed to admit has come with us for three moves. Which brings me to my next question, do you keep a fully stocked medicine cabinet or do you just go buy things when you need it? Im considering throwing everything away that expired in 2022 or earlier and then just stocking the stuff we use regularly (not replacing things that expired 8 years ago). But I feel like Covid made me want to always have stuff stocked.

3 of my brother in laws were there. One was very near the shooting. Thankfully they are all ok.

I agree with trying to talk to a nurse if you feel like you need to be seen. When my then 3yr old son broke his arm, the scheduler said they could see him in 3 weeks. I was like then there will be no point. So, she put me through to the nurse who was able to get him an appointment right away.

Ours is in 2027. Our older two kids will have graduated and our younger two will be 17 and 15, so in theory we could go away. We have not ever done a trip without the kids. Otoh, we will be paying for college for 4 kids over the next 10 years so we will probably do nothing.

It is one reason I kept my kids at the pediatrician as teenagers. I never had trouble getting a same day appointment there, but it was impossible at the primary care doc’s. I think they expect you to go to urgent care.

So thinking this through, I think there are a few categories: 1. People being rude. For some reason I don’t think I have really examined this. I have always just tried to be the better person and be kind. I think way back in the day if someone was rude to me, I assumed I had done something wrong so I would apologize or try to make it better. Then I think it morphed into “everyone is fighting a battle so choose kindness” which I think was a step in the right direction. But then it started eating at me because I honestly can’t remember a time that I ever stood up for myself or said anything back. And looking back, people have said/done some really rude things and I probably shouldn’t have ignored it. At some point, I think I got sick of the rudeness and instead of standing up for myself/possibly causing conflict, I moved across the ocean. 2. Harmful beliefs and behaviors. These things aren’t really rude, but are things that I could decide are dealbreakers and I could choose to limit contact over or speak up about 3. Things I disagree with are probably the things I need to just let go and change the conversation as long as the person is otherwise agreeable. These things I could be less judgmental about. 4. Not dealing with reality. This is hard for me, because it honestly feels hard to have a real relationship with someone who doesn’t live in the same world as me. I left a Bible study once because people were talking about the Covid vaccine having a chip from bill gates in it. They maybe do know a lot about the Bible, but how could I trust them? I try to have compassion for people who have fallen down the rabbit hole. I try to constantly guard against it because I’m sure it is easy to do. So maybe with this category I can be less judgmental but also not choose them as close friends or family. 5. If I am going to be different around my family, I will probably have to talk to my mom about it. My mom really is a great person and just wants everyone to be happy. Since I am generally pretty happy to please, I think she does rely on me to be the bigger person. I don’t think I have ever thought before whether that is fair or not.

Well, yes, if it weren’t for my mom there are several people in my family I probably wouldn’t talk to much other than sending a Christmas card and texting happy birthday or finding out what the kids want for Christmas, etc. But I really love my mom and her family getting along is very important to her. And I do want her to be happy. She has never done anything that bothers me other than pressuring me to “be the better person” in these relationships. My mom keeps all of her controversial opinions to herself and is always kind.

I agree. I don’t think it is actually a danger so it is something I let go.

@bolt. I love your list and it was very clarifying for me. For instance, I am absolutely not a believer in astrology, but I do have a good friend who is into it. I think the reasons I can handle that are because she is awesome in so many ways, she really likes her astrology, but doesn’t try to make me a believer, she doesn’t use it to do anything that I think is actually harmful.

Sorry I probably wasn’t really clear. The issues are with my family of origin. I was just thinking ahead to how I would handle it if my boys did things I thought were crazy. Like, for me, I know I wouldn’t handle it well if they didn’t vaccinate my grandchild at least for things like the measles. I would have a hard time if they only taught my grandchild the Bible. I certainly hope this never comes to pass, but I was just thinking I need to learn to handle people who do things differently than me now if that makes sense.

Ok these are some really good ideas. I sometimes just freeze when I am talking to them and I think some of it is that I do just think they are rude because they know my opinion on things and they purposefully bring these things up. It isn’t like I sit around and discuss gun rights. It makes me uncomfortable. I would really like to just do a lighthearted “oh you know I don’t believe that” and then change the subject. I like the idea of having conversation topics ahead of time so I don’t have to think of them on the spot. I also like the idea of being a little deaf. I don’t follow my dad on any social media and I think that has helped me have a better relationship with him because I don’t see all the crazy. Some of the stuff he would put on there would really hurt my feelings and now I don’t see it and he doesn’t say it to my face. And I like the idea of separating beliefs from behavior. And I think part of the problem is that they won’t budge on their beliefs, so keeping the relationship is really on me. Like they won’t leave their guns at home, so if I made that a requirement they would never come to my house-which maybe is fine? Except that it makes my mom upset and I love my mom. My mom would say family is more important than silly rules. ETA: haha I’m 41 years old and still don’t want to upset my mom

For the medical issue, they absolutely would give the child the medication if they believed the child had the condition (and they do give it when they don’t think they have been healed). I think they realize it is dangerous to not give it- their child has had to be admitted two times. The issue is that they keep believing that their child has been healed and the doctors just don’t believe in miracles so they can’t see it. So, when the child gets really sick, they take them in. Then they do the medicine for awhile, but then they will randomly go to a revival where the child is healed and then they quit giving the medicine. I really don’t actually know how they are allowed to do this, but I am confident that the doctors know they do. I think maybe because they do comply for awhile? eta: it is not diabetes but a different endocrine issue