Can I just say that I'm disgusted with how quickly girls grow up these days...

[LibraryLover]

Sure, it was fiction, but their ages were based in the reality of the times. I am reading a book right now titled, "The Time Traveler's Guide to the Middle Ages," which is why I was thinking about this. The population dropped by roughly half between 1300 and 1400, mainly due to disease. Half of the people die before agetwenty. Half of all of those who live to adulthood die before they reach age fifty. Roughly half of the population is under 21. Only 5% of the population is over 65. Medieval men are in their prime at twenty, mature at thirty and growing old by forty. People can serve on juries at twelve in some places. They start working at age 7. They can marry at age 14. They are required (if needed) to serve in the army at 15. At 16-20 many young noblemen are military battalion commanders. Today, battalion commanders are very young battalion commanders if they are 40. Chaucer has a famous quote calling a woman at thirty just, "winter forage."

 

Even more recently? My grandfather was picking cotton at 7.

 

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

 

 

Spartans, anyone?

[Mrs Mungo]

Spartans, anyone?

 

You have made me so happy by giving me an excuse to offer up this hilarious video:

 

Athenian/Spartan Wife Swap

[IsabelC]

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

 

Yes, for sure! (And many of us wait until Winter Forage age and then lament that we can't get pregnant.)

[LibraryLover]

You have made me so happy by giving me an excuse to offer up this hilarious video:

 

Athenian/Spartan Wife Swap

 

 

That one is fab! I love Horrible Histories.:tongue_smilie:

[ChocolateReignRemix]

You have made me so happy by giving me an excuse to offer up this hilarious video:

 

Athenian/Spartan Wife Swap

 

 

 

"You are going to a funeral...the rabbit's." :lol:

[MrsBasil]

You have made me so happy by giving me an excuse to offer up this hilarious video:

 

Athenian/Spartan Wife Swap

 

 

:lol: Thank you for that!

 

 

On topic, I've got nothing other than a vague feeling that some modern kids usually try to push the envelope of maturity in ways that would disturb adults and, because of social media and teens not having a great grasp of privacy controls or why they might want to use them, we're just seeing more of it.

 

There are probably lots of kids who don't act this way though.

[theYoungerMrsWarde]

You have made me so happy by giving me an excuse to offer up this hilarious video:

 

Athenian/Spartan Wife Swap

 

:lol::lol::smilielol5:

[Soror]

Sure, it was fiction, but their ages were based in the reality of the times. I am reading a book right now titled, "The Time Traveler's Guide to the Middle Ages," which is why I was thinking about this. The population dropped by roughly half between 1300 and 1400, mainly due to disease. Half of the people die before agetwenty. Half of all of those who live to adulthood die before they reach age fifty. Roughly half of the population is under 21. Only 5% of the population is over 65. Medieval men are in their prime at twenty, mature at thirty and growing old by forty. People can serve on juries at twelve in some places. They start working at age 7. They can marry at age 14. They are required (if needed) to serve in the army at 15. At 16-20 many young noblemen are military battalion commanders. Today, battalion commanders are very young battalion commanders if they are 40. Chaucer has a famous quote calling a woman at thirty just, "winter forage."

 

Even more recently? My grandfather was picking cotton at 7.

 

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

Interesting and true.

 

I don't agree with the actions in the OP and would be horrified if my daughters did such a thing. However, I had a boyfriend in K and there were little kisses here and there. I was not unusual in that regard. I was a good kid.

 

My dd5 already talks about getting married and such. She started asking me what happens when a girl wants to marry a guy, does she introduce herself. We don't have broadcast tv and she watches things like PBS and such on netflix. She hasn't done any outside activities and is always with me when we are out. Her hs friend age 6 is similarly inclined. She doesn't however know about boyfriends or girlfriends though. I think she thinks you find someone you like and then you get married or such and doesn't realize the details and all. She still makes comments here and there about marrying ds.

[Bear23]

I have cousin's daughter who does similar stuff. It still amazes me how we both have daughters the same age and how totally different their behaviors are.

okay this time I just looked at the links and that is so G rated compared to my cousin's daughter's Facebook page. not that I would allow it but this isn't as bad as I thought

ETA: Although there is no nudity on the links that I posted, the is some suggestive language on a few. Please click at your own risk.

 

In the past year or so I've noticed that my 11 year old niece has had a few boyfriends. They post lovey-dovey messages to each other all over Facebook. They change their relationship status to married (changing their last names accordingly). They go on vacation together. They spend the night in each others houses. They post inappropriate images of themselves posing suggestively in bikinis. They post things like this, and this, and this, and this, and this.... and well.. you get the picture.

 

 

:confused: I'm really confused. Am I an old fuddy-duddy? I just think 11 is way way too young for this sort of behavior? Am I crazy? My daughter is 9. This sort of thing makes me want to lock her in a closet somewhere.

 

Maybe I'm just old or something. When I was 11 I still played with Barbie.

Edited August 24, 2012 by Navywife2chief

[Michelle My Bell]

Isn't this part of the reason we homeschool? Seriously, I have never seen anything like that on my girls facebook pages. Not from them or the people that have as friends.

[Michelle My Bell]

Sure, it was fiction, but their ages were based in the reality of the times. I am reading a book right now titled, "The Time Traveler's Guide to the Middle Ages," which is why I was thinking about this. The population dropped by roughly half between 1300 and 1400, mainly due to disease. Half of the people die before agetwenty. Half of all of those who live to adulthood die before they reach age fifty. Roughly half of the population is under 21. Only 5% of the population is over 65. Medieval men are in their prime at twenty, mature at thirty and growing old by forty. People can serve on juries at twelve in some places. They start working at age 7. They can marry at age 14. They are required (if needed) to serve in the army at 15. At 16-20 many young noblemen are military battalion commanders. Today, battalion commanders are very young battalion commanders if they are 40. Chaucer has a famous quote calling a woman at thirty just, "winter forage."

 

Even more recently? My grandfather was picking cotton at 7.

 

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

 

I completely disagree. Things were bad in the past, that doesn't make them the way things should be.

[Joyofsixreboot]

"You are going to a funeral...the rabbit's." :lol:

 

Bwhaha:lol:

 

As for the original point.... Kids push limits. Parents are supposed to notice and redirect. It's not what I want my 8yo ( or even 13 yo) acting like but it doesn't surprise me.

[Night Elf]

:iagree: I am 41 and I was the "pastor" at those weddings (since I was the preacher's daughter and all!) Now I don't remember any physical stuff going on in elementary school but we did have "boyfriend/girlfriend" talk and weddings!

 

I have a scrapbook from when I was 12 yrs. old and I wrote poems about having babies with my boyfriend. At least I can say I didn't do more than kissing but I did have my first real kiss when I was 12 and that was in 1980. By 8th grade (age 13?), we were writing Mr. and Mrs. on our jeans instead of just on paper. I don't remember my mom saying anything about it.

 

Oh and when I had a break up with my boyfriend at 12, I would walk by his house holding a boom box blasting out Blondie's Call Me. :D

[Parrothead]

 

By the tine she was 15, her wisdom teeth were coming in, and the dentist blamed the hormones in the milk. That a kid her age shouldn't even be forming them yet.

 

 

I find this interesting and off topic. Dd is almost 13. At her last dental check up in July the dentist said she would not have wisdom teeth because there was nothing there being formed yet.

 

I suppose she is not out of the woods yet.

[Parrothead]

DD has had a small crush on her friends' older brother for a couple years now. But he doesn't even know she exists outside of being M and R's friend. She has just in the last few months taken an interest in her appearance. This did not even coincide with the beginning of the crush.

 

I think a lot of the stuff talked about in this thread is a sign of the unhealthy culture in institutional schools.

 

I have a friend who pulled her dd out of PS at age 7 (second grade) partially because of the boy crazy atmosphere there. This was a small school in the middle of nowhere.

[angela in ohio]

I think there is a lot of difference between the boyfriend/girlfriend, pretend marrying, etc. and the overly sexualized behavior. I think they are two different topics, and I think the latter is the one that has escalated at an alarming rate. I don't know that it is anything new (anyone watch Saturday Night Fever? :glare:) when women are only sexual objects to young men, but I think girls embracing it at such a high rate is new. I think many girls are yearning for male attention anyway they can get it, and I think the media's influence accounts for probably 75% of it, too.

[JenC3]

Yep. where I was from it was 14/15, but still WAY too early IMO. We believe in courtship so dating for my dd will be a bit different. Obviously she will have more control if/when she leaves our house before marriage, but we talk openingly now about protecting her and helping her choose a good mate. I ws NOT protected or guarded in any way. I was superficially punished for bad behavior and it was a short-lived punishment at best.

 

At 11 dd won't be on FB or texting or going anywhere unsupervised without me.

[trlt]

I think there is a lot of difference between the boyfriend/girlfriend, pretend marrying, etc. and the overly sexualized behavior. I think they are two different topics, and I think the latter is the one that has escalated at an alarming rate.

 

:iagree: I had elementary school crushes and pretended to get married when I was young but I had no clue what s*x was and I wasn't thinking that way at all.

 

I also agree with pp's that it is most likely the parent's fault that their children are like this (yes, I know there are exceptions). My niece is only 7 and my nephew is 5 and they are both way more "worldly" than my dd who is 5. Sadly, I can see why they are like they are because my sister encourages them both to act older than they are. She allows my niece to go on her (my sisters) facebook account and allows her to dress way older than she should. She also allows her to have friends that do the same (they already have facebook accounts and do not dress age appropriately). My bil is no help at all. They both allow the kids to watch inappropriate movies, tv shows, and play inappropriate video games (think Grand Theft Auto for a 3 year old). We were visiting my parents and my nephew brought GTA over to play. I thought it was a mistake so I said that I didn't think his parents would want him to play it and he told me that he does all the time. I called bil and sure enough they are allowed to play it and he was mad at me for calling! My point is, there are limits that kids should have and a lot of parents do not impose limits or even encourage behavior that is way older than the child. It is sad. My DH and I have already decided when we visit family we will not allow my dd to play with my niece and nephew unsupervised because we don't want to have dd introduced to things that she shouldn't be. It makes me sad because I don't want to have to worry about that but there has already been situations that have come up that I don't want to repeat.

[Mrs Mungo]

I completely disagree. Things were bad in the past, that doesn't make them the way things should be.

 

I am not longing for the "good old days." I like tv and the Internet and tampons and shorts and hair products. I am just saying that we are living in an unusual time. It is unusual from a historical perspective to have people who are basically 25-30 and still living as adolescents.

 

Child bearing becomes more risky and more difficult after 30 (it increases your breast cancer risks, among other things). But, more and more women are delaying child bearing and then sometimes are not fertile at that age. I don't think we (as a society) are being totally honest with ourselves about it.

 

DH and I married pretty young at 21 and 22. Our oldest dd was born when I was 23. It was young for my circles, but I would have had several kids by that age from a historical perspective. Saying this is not putting a judgment on today's society, it is just looking at facts.

 

Do I think we should start marrying our teenaged dds off to a man who is established in his life and career? No. I don't have any answers, only questions. ;)

 

I think many (not all!) young adults are sort of lost precisely because they aren't necessarily expected to set up household, get a decent paying job and all of that. What is a good answer? I don't know.

[mommaduck]

That's coming from 11 year olds?? :svengo:

 

Well, my dd's 14 and there is nothing remotely like that on her FB. If there were, I'd delete her account. End of story.

:iagree: However, if this were a different time and different place, she wouldn't have a boyfriend anyhow, she'd probably have a husband or soon have a husband. She's been taught what she needs to know for adulthood (yes, most fourteen year olds should know how to care for their hygiene, their home, and I even believe they should know how to care for other children...I did by fourteen also, other than cooking...my mother could not even cook, but I've made certain my children learn how to cook).

 

BTW, I met my husband when I was fifteen.

Edited August 24, 2012 by mommaduck

[Perry]

I am reading a book right now titled, "The Time Traveler's Guide to the Middle Ages," which is why I was thinking about this.

Sorry to hijack, but would this be appropriate for a 10th grader studying Middle Ages?

[mommaduck]

I think there is a lot of difference between the boyfriend/girlfriend, pretend marrying, etc. and the overly sexualized behavior. I think they are two different topics, and I think the latter is the one that has escalated at an alarming rate. I don't know that it is anything new (anyone watch Saturday Night Fever? :glare:) when women are only sexual objects to young men, but I think girls embracing it at such a high rate is new. I think many girls are yearning for male attention anyway they can get it, and I think the media's influence accounts for probably 75% of it, too.

Yes, there is a big difference.

[MiniBlondes]

I blame the parents. Period.

 

 

This is how I tend to feel about it as well. But I don't have a child that age yet. So I don't feel like I can cast a broad statement like that and have it be fair one.

 

It's funny because, while I'm a Christian, I'm not a conservative one. In fact I'm pretty liberal. But over the past 6 months or so I've just noticed more and more of these sorts of things and they make me sick.

 

I struggle with this because I don't want to smother my children and make them go the opposite direction. I want them to be smart and make good decisions. Don't we all? I think this whole thing is about my own personal fears about parenthood. I just hope I don't let my children down.

 

By the way, my 9 year old is currently playing 'stuffed animal shopping mall' in her room with two 9 and 10 year old friends. :lol:

[Mrs Mungo]

Sorry to hijack, but would this be appropriate for a 10th grader studying Middle Ages?

 

Yes, I think so. That is why I bought it. ;)

[Dobela]

Originally Posted by angela in ohio

I think there is a lot of difference between the boyfriend/girlfriend, pretend marrying, etc. and the overly sexualized behavior. I think they are two different topics, and I think the latter is the one that has escalated at an alarming rate. I don't know that it is anything new (anyone watch Saturday Night Fever? :glare:) when women are only sexual objects to young men, but I think girls embracing it at such a high rate is new. I think many girls are yearning for male attention anyway they can get it, and I think the media's influence accounts for probably 75% of it, too.

 

I don't think media is the only, or even the main, issue. We are now looking at the second and third generation of latchkey, daycare, group raised children who have little contact with parents/family daily. Those raising the majority of our children have very little vested in their upbringing beyond a paycheck. Parents have little time to pass on morals and values when they only see the kids before 8 am and after 6 pm. Add to that high divorce rates, many women chosing to parent alone and never name a father... There are not as many men standing behind it all and saying, "Whoa, not on my dd." Girls are looking for male influence. But so are Boys. Parents are so busy that they, in general, do not monitor what is being shown to kids. They don't pay attention to what is there, or the impact. They aren't parents, they are friends, which is easier to do when you are not with them 24/7, and want their kids to be 'cute'.

 

To me, the sexy behavior of the kids is more a symptom of what else is wrong.

[justamouse]

Sure, it was fiction, but their ages were based in the reality of the times. I am reading a book right now titled, "The Time Traveler's Guide to the Middle Ages," which is why I was thinking about this. The population dropped by roughly half between 1300 and 1400, mainly due to disease. Half of the people die before agetwenty. Half of all of those who live to adulthood die before they reach age fifty. Roughly half of the population is under 21. Only 5% of the population is over 65. Medieval men are in their prime at twenty, mature at thirty and growing old by forty. People can serve on juries at twelve in some places. They start working at age 7. They can marry at age 14. They are required (if needed) to serve in the army at 15. At 16-20 many young noblemen are military battalion commanders. Today, battalion commanders are very young battalion commanders if they are 40. Chaucer has a famous quote calling a woman at thirty just, "winter forage."

 

Even more recently? My grandfather was picking cotton at 7.

 

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

 

Very true. I was listening to a lecture from The teaching company and they were quoting stats just like that.

 

And, women who are middle aged are slamming into the reality that their prime fertile years are over and they should have been having children in their 20s or younger. Bu that is very frowned upon in our society, for a multitude of reasons. We have screwed things up.

 

Frankly, I think my oldest daughter is going to be getting married right out of HS, and I couldn't pick a better guy for her myself, but I do worry about it. I *really* worry about it. He's older by 7 years, and has a great career, she's learning a valuable trade that's she'll be licensed in this year, and still wants to go onto college (she wants to work at our company in the lab and plans on biochem), and they have us-we will always be supportive and help, but I worry.

 

And, I feel that I'm allowing something that would be screeched at in society. But can we really afford to look down on such things?

[justamouse]

I think there is a lot of difference between the boyfriend/girlfriend, pretend marrying, etc. and the overly sexualized behavior. I think they are two different topics, and I think the latter is the one that has escalated at an alarming rate. I don't know that it is anything new (anyone watch Saturday Night Fever? :glare:) when women are only sexual objects to young men, but I think girls embracing it at such a high rate is new. I think many girls are yearning for male attention anyway they can get it, and I think the media's influence accounts for probably 75% of it, too.

 

 

 

An overlook at the Hegemonic society that utilizes the media as a tool to dictate gender expression. This sets into motion the subordination of womyn (sic) in our society and that value that they hold as individuals politically and socially.

IT's a bit graphic.

 

HEre's a great blog post by Penelope Trunk, "Get Pregnant by 25 if you want a High Powered Career"

Edited August 24, 2012 by justamouse

[kewb]

I don't think media is the only, or even the main, issue. We are now looking at the second and third generation of latchkey, daycare, group raised children who have little contact with parents/family daily. Those raising the majority of our children have very little vested in their upbringing beyond a paycheck. Parents have little time to pass on morals and values when they only see the kids before 8 am and after 6 pm. Add to that high divorce rates, many women chosing to parent alone and never name a father... There are not as many men standing behind it all and saying, "Whoa, not on my dd." Girls are looking for male influence. But so are Boys. Parents are so busy that they, in general, do not monitor what is being shown to kids. They don't pay attention to what is there, or the impact. They aren't parents, they are friends, which is easier to do when you are not with them 24/7, and want their kids to be 'cute'.

 

To me, the sexy behavior of the kids is more a symptom of what else is wrong.

 

 

Wow. That is one tarred with a broad brush paragraph. I am sure there is a portion of the population that meets what you wrote but there are also plenty of 2 parent home families with a sahm that has little interest in parenting their children. Parenting is tough and demanding but many people do it successfully working full time, staying at home, single, divorced, never been married, etc. I even have friends whose kids go to school and their kids are lovely, polite, smart individuals.

 

To be honest the things the original poster linked are not so different from the things my girlsfriends and I said and wrote to each other when I was 11-13. We thought we were all that and a bag of chips. We talked a big game. The difference is that it was private amongst my girlfriends. There was no facebook, no tumblr, etc. We had privacy. What is lacking in todays kids in the understanding that the internet is forever. Even if you take it down 5 minutes later someone has seen it and itis out there. They do not value privacy or understand why you want it. Everything is out there. They are open books. This is where parenting comes in. Parents who are teaching their kids to look towards the future and value keeping private what should be private.

[Mrs Mungo]

Very true. I was listening to a lecture from The teaching company and they were quoting stats just like that.

 

And, women who are middle aged are slamming into the reality that their prime fertile years are over and they should have been having children in their 20s or younger. Bu that is very frowned upon in our society, for a multitude of reasons. We have screwed things up.

 

Frankly, I think my oldest daughter is going to be getting married right out of HS, and I couldn't pick a better guy for her myself, but I do worry about it. I *really* worry about it. He's older by 7 years, and has a great career, she's learning a valuable trade that's she'll be licensed in this year, and still wants to go onto college (she wants to work at our company in the lab and plans on biochem), and they have us-we will always be supportive and help, but I worry.

 

And, I feel that I'm allowing something that would be screeched at in society. But can we really afford to look down on such things?

 

Right. I think women, in particular, are stuck between a rock and a hard place. We tell them that they have choices, but there is a pretty big stigma for young moms. We tell them that they have choices, but not every choice is going to be an eternally viable one.

 

Now, this has little to do with the 9-11 year old issue. My kids weren't on Facebook at that age and even now my girls' facebooks are mostly filled with sci-fi and nerdy/geeky references. One of eldest dd's male friends posted a video of Jasmine and Aladdin singing in Latin with a suggestion that they try it, if they see each other again (they are both military kids). That's about as racy as it gets.

 

I also agree with kewb that it is the level of privacy that is more different than the behaviors.

Edited August 24, 2012 by Mrs Mungo

[Jpoy85]

I think it has to do with parenting.

[J-rap]

One of them main reasons we have homeschooled. We were pretty strict but our children never even knew it! :)

[lea_lpz]

I did similarly when I was 11. Not that I'm recommending it; just saying it's not a "these days" issue IMO. There was no FB when I was 11, but we told jokes that would have been similar to those FB posts and wrote, "Danielle loves Stephen 4ever!!!" and other stupidity on our folders.

 

:iagree:

 

Me, too! But I had very lax parents, we had stopped going to church for years, and they never set any standards for me about dating or remaining pure for marriage. So, I hope my dd is more level headed at that age.

 

In fact, I remember that last link written down in notes passed to each other in junior high. {sigh} it's no wonder teens / Tweens get in over their heads. Look out how they psyche up their relationships with this crap!

Edited August 24, 2012 by lea_lpz

[lea_lpz]

11yo girls should all be given ponies. Then they won't have time or energy for this boy nonsense. Caring for a pony can eat up a whole weekend, not to mention schoolnights.

 

:iagree:

 

Hitting the like button for this!

[Guest]

11yo girls should all be given ponies. Then they won't have time or energy for this boy nonsense. Caring for a pony can eat up a whole weekend, not to mention schoolnights.

 

:lol: There is clearly some truth to this. This is why my dh and his brother were given horses and 4H steers!

 

Errr...have you read Romeo and Juliet? I agree that 9-11 is very young for that sort of thing today. But, the truth is, kids generally grow up much more slowly than in the past.

 

:iagree:

 

We have delayed adulthood and lament that young adults get pregnant at the time of life that nature intended. OR lament that they don't grow up and take responsibility when they have never been expected to do it before. It is *now* that is sort of the weird time, really. That is all.

 

I completely agree with this! I have thought for years that we, as a society, put kids between a rock and a hard place because we delay adulthood far beyond biological adulthood. We simultaneously hope they won't get pregnant in their teens and hope they will get their act together before their mid-twenties. We don't want teenage mothers but we don't want x-box-playing basement-dwellers, either. We blab about retaining their innocence through high school and maybe through college, but then we expect them to flip the switch and become self-sufficient grown-ups. (All "we" meaning society in general. And with the caveat that I am doing this too!)

 

:iagree:

 

Me, too! But I had very lax parents, we had stopped going to church for years, and they never set any standards for me about dating or remaining pure for marriage. So, I hope my dd is more level headed at that age.

 

I just wanted to point out that my parents never stopped our church-going, but they were still lax with no standards. Among teens, s*xual activity was as rampant within the church as anywhere outside it.

 

I realize that there are exceptions, but IMO, most 11yo's who post things like the OP linked are a lot like dogs that chase cars. They put up a great show but aren't all that sure what they will do with the car when they finally catch one.

 

 

:iagree: The "panties" post does certainly raise one's eyebrows and I would make my dd delete it if it were on her page, BUT I don't think an 11yo "sharing" something like that means they certainly get it from an experiential point of view. Even the "kissing" post - I can imagine when I was 11, had there been FB, I would have thought nothing of that post. Everybody was kissing or was posturing that they were kissing. As far as "married" or using the boy's last name or saying "I love you" - this is very equivalent to things I and my friends were doing at 11, or even younger. I remember a "boyfriend" I had when I was 11 - we marked a date on the calendar 7 years away when we could get married. We used to sigh and say, "Seven years..." like we were Romeo and Juliet. It's so silly now! I wouldn't want to see some of that stuff showing up on dd's wall, but I'm also saying that talking like this does not mean stuff is actually going on. I would consider it only in light of other things I knew about the family and child.

[4kidlets4me]

I really think it's in how you parent. Parents don't want to say NO to anything these days.

[BearWallowSchool]

I didn't read the responses but this is the #1 reason I'm not sending my daughter to public school! :crying:

[Rebel Yell]

Oh and when I had a break up with my boyfriend at 12, I would walk by his house holding a boom box blasting out Blondie's Call Me. :D

 

:hurray:

 

I'm guessing it didn't end as well as John Cusack's boom box scene in Say Anything? :D

[ChrissySC]

Hmmm, mine doesn't even have an fb page ... so there. :) Not until 14.

 

I think it is not the kids that grow up, but rather the lack of the parents involvement and age appropriate prohibition and correction.

[I.Dup.]

One of the many reasons that I'm homeschooling my kids, is to keep them away from things like this and hopefully help them hold on to their childhood. By the time I was 13 I was fully s*exually active and sneaking out to parties. I don't want that lifestyle for my kids. Things like that on facebook I don't see as innocent. Many of them looked relatively harmless, but the one with the panties was disturbing for a child to have passed around. And the message it sends to the boys is downright scary.

 

I think that is absolutely disgusting and no way will my kids be on FB until they are of the minimum age and I will be ALL over those pages. :lol::lol:

 

Since you know your nieces are underage, have you considered reporting them?

 

I was briefly FB friends with my brother's stepson. He was a cute kid but no way should he have been on FB. He was 10. I considered it awhile but then unfriended him. It made me uncomfortable seeing him around, even though I think he was primarily there to FV. It was just wrong. At 10, he should have been bike riding outside. :(

 

I blame the parents. Period.

 

:iagree:

 

Mrs. Mungo, what do you think should be done in this situations? And does childbearing after 30 really increase breast cancer risk? Or only if you start having children after 30? :confused:

[Dory]

I had a thought run through my head this morning (yes shocking for mornings for me). I was wondering, is the show of hormones really them growing up? Or is it the exact opposite?

There have always been the overly hormonal, early maturing girls out there. I'm wondering if they were actually pushed to truly 'grow up' if their behaviour would be more controlled an appropriate. The fact that everything is so sexualized and rude seems to me to be more of a symptom of people not requiring their children to grow up at a healthy rate and instead pretending that there is no need to teach them how to behave for their age.

I still think it is a sign of poor parenting.

[5knights3maidens]

posted wrong place.

Edited August 24, 2012 by 5knights3maidens
posted wrong

[justamouse]

I really think it's in how you parent. Parents don't want to say NO to anything these days.

 

To say it's all in the parenting means that society is not at all responsible.

 

It's not either/or.

[I.Dup.]

I do believe it is mostly the parenting. 90%. Society wouldn't have such an impact if parents were more diligently doing their job. A really good book on this is "Hold On To Your Kids"

[justamouse]

I do believe it is mostly the parenting. 90%. Society wouldn't have such an impact if parents were more diligently doing their job. A really good book on this is "Hold On To Your Kids"

 

Watch the video I posted. They prove that the media goes against what we as parents want, because they know in the end, it will make them money.

 

We are also parenting on the cusp of an incredible time in history. We are the first generation of parents dealing with mass media-media thats in every area of life. This is no tube TV, or radio. Unwittingly, we let the horse out of the barn, and are wondering how to get it back in without squelching freedom.

[woolybear]

I just want to say that this is not a sign of "how quickly girls grow up these days." It is merely play acting (going through the motions of "acting grown up".) I think they are still as mature at age 11 as girls in generations before. They are just following cultural standards without real understanding or emotion behind it. Ugh. I think it's even worse. It would be better if they actually understood what they are putting out there, but I don't think they do. Just my .02 cents.

[Mrs Mungo]

Mrs. Mungo, what do you think should be done in this situations?

 

Would I let my kids sneak out of the house? No, I check on them. Do my kids have stuff like this on their Facebook? No, they are friends with my and half of my friends and family. Did I let my kids have a Facebook before they were 13? Nope, I didn't, my youngest still doesn't have a Facebook, no, not even for games. What would I do in those situations? I don't know because I haven't experienced any of them with my kids.

 

And does childbearing after 30 really increase breast cancer risk? Or only if you start having children after 30? :confused:

 

My understanding is that it's both. Mostly the latter, but the former to some degree. At least, I know that one of my best friends has a dad who is an oncologist, and he actually yelled at her when she got pregnant the third time, because she was 31.

 

Breastfeeding lowers your risk, especially if you nurse over 1 1/2 years or so. Drinking raises your risk. Being overweight increases your risk. Physical activity lowers your risk. There are a lot risk factors that you cannot control and some that you can.

[Mom2OandE]

Yeah that is NOT ok. That's why my kids won't have FB pages until they are much much older and I'm sure they know how to handle themselves.

[I.Dup.]

Watch the video I posted. They prove that the media goes against what we as parents want, because they know in the end, it will make them money.

 

We are also parenting on the cusp of an incredible time in history. We are the first generation of parents dealing with mass media-media thats in every area of life. This is no tube TV, or radio. Unwittingly, we let the horse out of the barn, and are wondering how to get it back in without squelching freedom.

 

Just watched it. Very convincing indeed. It is depressing, the outlook of things. I wish knowing what we know now as a society, we could go back.

[Mommy22alyns]

11yo girls should all be given ponies. Then they won't have time or energy for this boy nonsense. Caring for a pony can eat up a whole weekend, not to mention schoolnights.

 

I like this! I think gymnastics will work as well for Rebecca. Now for Sylvia...

[Audrey]

I can't comment on the facebook aspect of it because no one in this household does facebook. But... I would give almost anything to have been allowed to stay a child a few years more. I am actively encouraging my son to enjoy his childhood, while still trying to maintain the balance in encouraging his normal maturation. It is a dangerous thing to flirt with adult-ness as a child.

 

If I had a daughter, I think I might be even more diligent. Throwing away one's childhood is sad, but more so when someone rips it away from you when you weren't suspecting it.