S/O from Colleen's thread...gratitude and jealousy

[Heather in Neverland]

I read all 9 pages or so of Colleen's thread regarding other people's beautiful homes and one of the posters mentioned that we all have something in our lives that someone else wishes they had even though they have good things in their life too. So I thought it would be interesting to do a little "gratitude and jealousy" poll to put things in perspective. :D

 

What are you a little bit (or a lot) jealous of that you've read about on these boards?

 

What do you have that you are truly grateful for that others might wish they had?

 

I'll go first:

 

I am jealous of all of you with lots of children. Desperately jealous. We have one bio child who is labeled "a miracle" as in it is a miracle we ever got pregnant. We scraped, and saved and cashed in a 401K to adopt our second son from Korea. I would LOVE more children...I truly ache for them...but unless God grants us another miracle (biological or financial) it ain't happening and my biological clock is ticking....and I HATE when people tell me I should be grateful for the two I have. Of course, I am but it doesn't stop me from wanting more.

 

I am truly grateful for my job. My dh lost his job a few years ago and luckily I have career that is both rewarding to me and pays well with excellent benefits. Oh, and I am grateful for my dh who has not only adjusted to but actually enjoys being a SAHD and homeschooling the kids. Not many men would do that!

 

How about you?

[OnTheBrink]

I don't know if I'd call it outright jealousy, because I don't begrudge anyone this who has it in their lives, but I always feel a pang of wanting when I read about others' happy marriages and good husbands.

 

And, I have a fabulous church who takes good care of me and my kids. I always cringe when I read of people whose churches have hurt them or hear about people who have suffered at the hands of their church.

[FO4UR]

This sounds fun!

 

I am jealous of anyone who gets a shower daily and gets to "go potty" without company:lol:

 

I am truly grateful for my 2yo who wakes me up (at 6am) with smooches on the nose, my 3yo who sings songs just for me, and my 5yo who loves to learn.:001_smile:

[Heather in Neverland]

And, I have a fabulous church who takes good care of me and my kids. I always cringe when I read of people whose churches have hurt them or hear about people who have suffered at the hands of their church.

 

Oh yeah, that too. We had a wonderful church when we lived in NC but since we moved back to Michigan we have been floundering. I truly miss having a great church.

[LisaNY]

 

 

I am jealous of all of you with lots of children. Desperately jealous. We have one bio child who is labeled "a miracle" as in it is a miracle we ever got pregnant. We scraped, and saved and cashed in a 401K to adopt our second son from Korea. I would LOVE more children...I truly ache for them...but unless God grants us another miracle (biological or financial) it ain't happening and my biological clock is ticking....and I HATE when people tell me I should be grateful for the two I have. Of course, I am but it doesn't stop me from wanting more.

 

 

 

(((Heather)))

[Kelli in TN]

Geez. The hormones are flowing and I just had a major meltdown and everyone is tiptoeing around me right now as I have scared the bejeebies out of them.....but....keeping in mind that I am in a hormonal state right now and might repent of this in 48 hours......

 

 

I am jealous of moms whose husbands are truly sharing the parenting burden. Not moms who have 17 year old daughters who share the parenting burden, but husbands who share it. 17 year old daughters should not be coming to Mom's rescue.

 

I will probably delete this when my hormones settle down, but it feels kind of good to say it now.

[paula j]

Not really jealousy but some times I wish we had the extra finances to do things like travel, redo the house, buy new furniture.:glare:

 

On the other hand, I am truly blessed and no matter how bad the situation may seem, God sees me through it. Also He gave me the intelligence to think my way through most problems.:001_smile:

[sassenach]

I envy people who have stable finances. I don't so much envy their "stuff," but I do envy their lack of stress over money.

 

 

I'm thankful for a husband that works his butt off so I can stay home with our kids. I'm also thankful for a mom that is one of my best friends.

[Sue G in PA]

I've been in a perpertual state of jealousy recently. I am truly jealous of those who are financially comfortable w/ only their dh working to accomplish it. For us, it's getting worse each month and we are falling farther and farther behind. I'm jealous of people who can go on vacation anywhere they want...especially Disney where my kids have been begging to go. Ain't happening anytime soon. I'm jealous of the big, modern kitchens and large, spacious homes w/ beautiful gardens and lots of land. I'm jealous of people who seem to have it all together, can organize circles around me without thinking.

 

Okay, now for the grateful part. Hmmm...I am truly, 100% grateful for my beautiful, healthy children. I wouldn't trade them for the world. So many ache to have children and God has blessed us w/ 7 and maybe more. Why? I don't know b/c we certainly aren't the best parents in the world. I am grateful for my supportive family, my awesome neighbor who treats my kids like her own grandkids, the ability to homeschool and a husband who loves me. Most of all...I am grateful for you all. You just don't know how much this forum has meant to me recently.

[Heather in Neverland]

Geez. The hormones are flowing and I just had a major meltdown and everyone is tiptoeing around me right now as I have scared the bejeebies out of them.....but....keeping in mind that I am in a hormonal state right now and might repent of this in 48 hours......

 

 

I am jealous of moms whose husbands are truly sharing the parenting burden. Not moms who have 17 year old daughters who share the parenting burden, but husbands who share it. 17 year old daughters should not be coming to Mom's rescue.

 

I will probably delete this when my hormones settle down, but it feels kind of good to say it now.

 

VENT AWAY!!!! Your hormones are safe here....:grouphug::grouphug:

[Jenny in Florida]

I'm always envious (as opposed to jealous) of the folks here who have warm and enriching relationships with extended family. I'm pretty much permanently estranged from my own "family of origin," which wasn't all that warm and enriching to begin with. And my husband's family has fallen apart since my mother-in-law passed away a few years ago. So, not only do I not have a mother to love and support me, but my kids have no meaningful relationships with grandparents or aunts and uncles or cousins or any of that stuff. And I hate it, because I grew up feeling so alone, and now, despite my best efforts, they're repeating that story.

 

I'm envious of people, including many here, who seem to have places or communities in which they feel they "belong" : churches, homeschool groups, co-ops, friends, etc. I'm one of those who just doesn't seem to fit anywhere. I belong to a religious denomination that is both too small and too diverse in its belief and practice to feel terribly cohesive, have kids that make it impossible to fit into a homeschool group or co-op, have no hobbies or interests (that I have the time and energy to pursue) than lend themselves to socializing in groups, and, in recent years, I've seen the few long-term friendships I tried so hard to maintain fall away.

 

Mostly, right now, I'm feeling very envious of women who know how to ask for (demand?) the support and validation they need from their mates and families. It's not a talent or skill I've yet mastered.

 

Now, as for gratitude: I'm grateful every day that my "family of origin" is not currently causing chaos and pain in the lives of my real family (meaning my husband and kids and me). We went through enough trauma with them over a period of several years that I never take for granted one single day--no matter how otherwise stressful or difficult--that doesn't involve returning to that period of my life.

 

And, in addition to all the mundane things like a roof over my head and a husband who works hard to provide for us and enough financial breathing room to not count my pennies too carefully to cover our basic needs and many of our wants, I'm incredibly grateful for my two amazing, challenging, breath-taking, strong, talented, healthy, funny, occasionally-crazy-making children.

[dragons in the flower bed]

What are you a little bit (or a lot) jealous of that you've read about on these boards?

 

I feel jealous of the lack of flakiness some of you exhibit. I wish I could remember where I left my head at least half of the time. The kid in my sig line who I call the absent-minded professor? He comes by it naturally: he has his mom's head, always in the clouds (but the intelligence part comes from his dad). I would happily actually give my left arm if by doing so I could gain the ability to remember an appointment, everything I need to bring to the appointment, and how to get there. Or the name of someone I see at least twice a month. Or the last few words of the sentence I was about to say.

 

What do you have that you are truly grateful for that others might wish they had?

 

 

That others here wish they had? I'm not sure there is anything. Others in general? Every single day I'm grateful for hot, clean water on tap, and for a full size refrigerator that works. I lived without both of those for a couple of years.

[Dawn E]

I am somewhat envious of the moms who seem to be able to do it all--homeschool very well while keeping a clean house and feeding healthy foods to their families. Of course, people could be lying, but I do think there are some very accomplished teachers with great organizational skills and healthy habits here.

 

I am very grateful for my wonderful husband and his fantastic family. My in-laws are very dear to me and the boards help me realize that that is not terribly common.

[WTMindy]

How about you?

 

Good idea!!! I'm also jealous of large families. I would love to have a huge "quiver", but dh is a 2 kid kinda dad! God has given me great contentment and it allows me to do other things, but if I had my druthers......

 

I am so grateful for my relationship with my parents and my in-laws!!! We live close by all of our family and they are my favorite people in the world. WHen I read about how many people have problems with inlaws or parents I am even more grateful!!!

[Chris in CA]

I really envy those here whose lives are settled, not just owning a house, but dh's job is set, future is planned, etc. My dh is still looking for a new job, we are not settled in the least, I'm going back to school, we rent, everything seems to be up in the air right now. I have a best friend IRL who used to tell me that she envied me because her life was all planned out and there were no new adventures, etc. Well after watching us go through the last few years - she doesn't say that anymore :001_smile:

 

What I am blessed with is a dh I adore and adores me after almost 16 years, who is also very sexy ;) Two dds that I love to be with and miss when they aren't around - which is saying something since they are 13 and 11. Living where people vacation, good health and a church that feels like home - finally .

[elegantlion]

Jealous of people with secure financial positions. Ours has been all over the board but has never felt secure.:glare:

 

Grateful for having a dh who trusts his beloved son's education totally to me. He never questions how much money I need even when finances are tight. He never questions whether I am doing a good job or not.

[LG Gone Wild]

who have kids that are ahead scholastically and that seem to have this whole hs thing/schedule down. I am constantly behind and hitting obstacles.

 

I am glad I have a dh who only insists on affections (ahem) and clean and pressed clothes to wear for work. I am free to be my own person.

[DarcyM]

I'll play.

 

I am envious of those of you who have perfectly healthy kids, who only see your child's pediatrician once-a-year instead of a team of -ologists, weekly therapies, the guilt of your child's early birth, his massive brain bleed and the fact his life is forever different because of his birth. I envy those of you who go where you want to go, any time of year, never considering the contagiousness or illnesses of people who are there.

 

I envy those of you get really big and pregnant in your third trimesters and give birth to whopping 7+ pounders who come out screaming and pink. I would love to feel confident about having more babies. But I'll never put another child through the NICU again. So my 3 are all we'll have. We're so lucky to have all 3.

 

I am grateful for the husband that most women dream about... who loves me, provides for us, is a strong daddy and a good man. He built us a beautiful home, works his tail off, and has made our life comfortable and secure. I am so thankful for 3 beautiful boys.

 

Great thread.

[Chris in CA]

((((Darcy)))) - your post truly makes me grateful, thanks for the reminder

[JenneinCA]

Envious of:

People who got to choose how many children to have

People whose kids are normal

People who can get anywhere without a map and directions

People who enjoy driving a car

People who feel like they belong someplace

 

 

Gratitude for:

Health

Air conditioning

My husband's job, that he really likes and pays the bills

My parents, who are close enough to help but far enough away too

My husband, who loves me no matter what

My kids, who also love me no matter what

[Sarah CB]

I'm jealous of people who grow their own vegetables, or grind their own wheat. People who can peaches or pickles. People who make jam and people who make syrup. I'm jealous of anyone who has matching spice containers - especially if said containers are also labelled and alphabetized (not pointing any fingers or anything :)). I'm jealous of people who cook from Nourishing Traditions (my copy has sat on my shelf since Christmas; unused). I'm jealous of people who make their own baby food - not because they ran out of baby food and had to frantically find something they could mash up and feed to their baby - I mean people who purposely make baby food and then freeze it in nice little ice cube trays. I'm jealous of anyone who runs their home purposefully rather than randomly and a little erratically.

 

And I'm thankful for my in-laws. They're all lovely and loveable and they don't cause any trouble at all. And I'm very thankful that I have children over 5. I love the 2 year old and everything, but boy kids become useful when they can scrub toilets and scoop dog poo.

[Sparkle]

Excellent thread!

 

I am jealous of other people's large houses. I'm also jealous of people who can afford extras for their kids, like camp and dance lessons. However, I know that our financial situation is due to a lot of stupid decisions on my part in the past, so I don't have any reason to complain or look for pity.

 

I'm jealous of people who still have living parents and grandparents. I'm jealous of families whose in-laws actually enjoy spending time with their grandchildren and doing things with them.

 

I'm a little jealous of moms who have jobs. I loved having my part-time job, but it interfered with our lives too much, so dh made me give it up.

 

What I'm grateful for: My dh's job. He has an excellent, secure job with a good salary and very good benefits, and I'm beyond thankful for it. Of course, I'm grateful for dh, too, and the fact that even though I weigh as much as a moose, he's still attracted to me.

 

My faith and my awesome little church. I'm also grateful that my conversion to a different religion didn't cause problems between me and dh.

 

My friends. I don't have a lot of friends but the ones I have are the best.

 

My children. I have 4 terrific kids, all healthy, cute, and more or less intelligent :)

 

My haves totally outweigh my have-nots, but it's great to see this all down in black and white, and see what other people wish for and are thankful for.

[Vida Winter]

That I am very grateful for my dh being an excellent provider and heck of a cute guy who knows how to get things done. He's the hardest worker I've ever known. I'm grateful for my family, extremely grateful. I love my dh and dc with all my heart.

 

As far as what I'm jealous of, I have to say two things. One; I wish my daughters would get along. I hear of other families (and have seen this too) where the siblings are nice to each other. I know I have 5 years between each child and that makes it interesting; but being an only child myself I just don't understand sibling rivalry.

 

Two; I wish my dh were on board with our religious life. I teach Sunday School and try my darndest to educate the kids to know Christ. But my dh (who attended 12 yrs of Catholic school) is an atheist, probably an agnostic at best. It breaks my heart to not be able to "do" anything about this except trust in the Lord and pray for him. If I say anything it will turn him off. I need to be a living example and trust Christ to do what is necessary. I have learned from this that I need to be very gentle in my religious education or else my dc will turn away from it as my dh has.

[Amy in Orlando]

WOW - this thread is making me think a lot! First of all (((Kelli))) like someone said, your hormones are safe with us!

 

What am I jealous of? Really not that much - depends on my mood. I do envy those of you who truly don't worry about money. I don't begrudge the fact that you have more money than I might, but I'd love to reach a point where I didn't worry about it all the time. But, I wonder if I'm just the sort of person that might worry all the time????

 

Some days, I'm really envious of the different lives you all lead - I'd love to live somewhere with seasons; I'd love to live on a ranch (if the animals could be convinced to be fed late at night and not early in the morning lol); I'd love to live in a city ... you know what I mean ... I'd love to do something that's not my life some days.

 

Some days, I envy those of you who truly enjoy cooking for your families. I try, but I just don't. I do cook, but it's not something that gets me excited.

 

When I feel this way, I often think back to a Christmas when we had NOTHING. NOTHING. Someone asked my oldest son (I think he was about three) what he wanted for Christmas. I cringed, we couldn't afford anything. He looked at me and said "I don't know. What don't we have, Mom?" And he was right. Still is. We have everything we "need." The rest is gravy. And I feel very lucky that all of my kids still have that same kind of attitude. They love gifts and surprises, but they don't really ask for anything without giving it a LOT of thought.

 

What am I grateful for? Aside from the basics (health, water, electricity, food ...) I'm grateful to live in a home where we all truly like each other (most of the time - hormones come in to play more and more these days :lol:).

 

My youngest son's best friend lives across the street. He was adopted when he was three. Until he moved into their house we were friendly with our neighbors, but never more than a wave or a quick "can I borrow this" kind of thing. After they adopted their son, we got to know them and count them among our very best friends. The thing that always strikes me is how this boy's mom describes how they felt before they adopted their son. They had tried all the infertility stuff before adoption and I have an inkling from other friends how stressful that can be.

 

This woman said the thing that kept them going with the treatments and then pursuing adoption was that every time she was outside she heard laughter coming from my house. I had never thought about this EVER. I never considered how much fun we generally have - even when I am stressed out about money or health issues or whatever.

 

Her telling me that was one of the best gifts one person could give to another. I now appreciate when we all crack up or, like during our recent house remodel, when something goes horribly wrong how someone turns it around. I mean, really ... how lucky am I that someone pointed this simple thing out to me?

 

And now, I get the same kick when I'm doing laundry (in our garage, so it's basically outside) or working in the yard and I get to hear this family laughing in their own house.

 

Good heavens, someone get me a tissue. I've never put this all into a complete thought or into writing.

[Vida Winter]

You've got me all sniffling too. Pass the tissues this way, please. What a beautiful post.

[gardenschooler]

I'm jealous of all of you runners, because WOW! You're fit and sleek and look at you go! I should be doing that! Someone unglue me from this seat, will you? Yell at me, smack me through the computer, something!

 

I'm thankful I have a peaceful life. It may not be that exciting, but it's calm. I like, no need that. Constancy, no chaos. Orderly and predictable, and for the most part, harmonious. Aaaaah. I like to enjoy the little things, and not having a lot of money doesn't bother me. I could be raking in big bucks if I wanted to (really? how?), but I'm happy in my little perch. I get to savor life, not having to work. I really, really appreciate that.

[WTMindy]

I'll play.

 

I am envious of those of you who have perfectly healthy kids, who only see your child's pediatrician once-a-year instead of a team of -ologists, weekly therapies, the guilt of your child's early birth, his massive brain bleed and the fact his life is forever different because of his birth. I envy those of you who go where you want to go, any time of year, never considering the contagiousness or illnesses of people who are there.

 

I envy those of you get really big and pregnant in your third trimesters and give birth to whopping 7+ pounders who come out screaming and pink. I would love to feel confident about having more babies. But I'll never put another child through the NICU again. So my 3 are all we'll have. We're so lucky to have all 3.

 

I am grateful for the husband that most women dream about... who loves me, provides for us, is a strong daddy and a good man. He built us a beautiful home, works his tail off, and has made our life comfortable and secure. I am so thankful for 3 beautiful boys.

 

Great thread.

 

:grouphug::grouphug:Big hugs, Darcy!!

[gardenschooler]

 

This woman said the thing that kept them going with the treatments and then pursuing adoption was that every time she was outside she heard laughter coming from my house. I had never thought about this EVER. I never considered how much fun we generally have - even when I am stressed out about money or health issues or whatever.

 

Her telling me that was one of the best gifts one person could give to another. I now appreciate when we all crack up or, like during our recent house remodel, when something goes horribly wrong how someone turns it around. I mean, really ... how lucky am I that someone pointed this simple thing out to me?

 

And now, I get the same kick when I'm doing laundry (in our garage, so it's basically outside) or working in the yard and I get to hear this family laughing in their own house.

 

Good heavens, someone get me a tissue. I've never put this all into a complete thought or into writing.

 

Get me one, too. I have always envied that about your family - how much fun you seem to have together, how you just all seem to be in it together. We're all going in our separate directions, it seems, and I can't imagine what would happen if we tried to do a *project* together. I'd probably end up smashing something other than tiles.

 

But you're an inspiration to me, even though I can't really hear the laughter (well, I can, thanks to your home movies!).

 

Here's to laughing and working together. I think I'm going to come up with a simple project (maybe a garden path or something outside) and see if we *can* work together on something. I'll bet we can. We might even laugh once or twice, who knows.

 

You really do have a special family, Amy. :::sniff::: Now give me those tissues!

[CactusPair]

Envious of:

 

The energy so many of you have. I wish I could cook and clean and zip about the way others do.

 

A graduate degree. Achingly, crazy envious. Back in the day I had planned to get a Phd., but it's not gonna happen.

 

More babies. Good libraries. A family vacation.

 

Grateful for:

 

My continued ability to walk, drive, see, use my hands, think clearly and live almost painfree. Grateful isn't the word. Awestruck, euphoric.

 

A healthy, faithful husband who loves to cook and mostly follows my parenting lead. He respects my feline-ness, loves me for it, the nut.:)

 

2 healthy children--good and grubby, my little miracles, my treasures, my reason for being.

 

My modest house, my moled-up yard, my windows and not having to transfer and move again, knock on wood. Peace....

[Natalieclare]

I'm so very grateful that everyone in our family likes each other, likes even the one who has struggled with some extremely annoying tendencies. So grateful the siblings rose to the challenge to love someone challenging, to be part of that person's path to social success through support rather than pushing away in annoyance. I like my kids, I really enjoy their company; I was such a brat as a kid, I never expected to be rewarded with such grace and mercy!

 

I. seriously. covet. the organization and efficiency I see represented here. I want to harness all my energy that takes me to the left and to the right so I can go in one straight line forward for five minutes one day!

 

Oh and the other object of my jealousy is the articulation of so many posters. I am frequently unable to put my thoughts into words. Often I read with oh, such a frustrated longing to be able to express myself well. I think to myself, well, if only I could just call the boards!

 

And I am positively kiwi-colored over anyone who got to sleep through the night last night. If you have had an uninterrupted night's sleep, you'd better let praise be the first thing on your lips because you've been very blessed.

[battlemaiden]

Envious:

 

Of those who have a husband home every night. Have the ability to make decisions together, raise children together, and generally not feel the weight of all household matters alone.

 

Those who have family nearby. Being able to drop roots.

 

Thankful:

 

Oh my, so much.

 

A bulging squirmy belly. Healthy children.

 

My current geographical residence, the view out of my military-issue, unalterably cramped quarters.

 

A street full of friendly neighbors who would come to my aid if needed.

 

****Btw- I have let more people visit in my partially unpacked, crowded, cluttered, disorganized home in the last month than I could have ever imagined myself willing. My pride be darned! People are generally curious about what exists on the other side of our neighbor's front doors. It has humbled me and comforted me to see how relieved my new neighbors and friends are to see a "real" home with cluttered counters with 3x as many children's cups on the counter than children I have borne, cereal under the table, and dishes in the sink. I may be momentarily impressed by seeing photos of beautiful kitchens, but I am endeared and invariably allied to those who post it like it is-in its "lived in" state.****

 

Jo

[Julie in Monterey]

Wow! What an amazing thread!

 

I'm thankful for these boards and all of you. I've been away for a long time. Coming back on feels a bit like returning to an old group of friends. It's comforting to know that even though we don't have many home school friends that we are close to, I have this group. This collective group of souls that "get it", that share my experience. For all of the guidance, support, links, tips everything from people I've never met. Over the past 5 years I've learned so much from all of you. Like tonight, I've been urged to stop and reflect on what I'm thankful for. What a wonderful gift!

 

I'm thankful for my family's health. It's something I don't ever want to take for granted.

 

I'm thankful for being happier than I ever expected after 11 years of marriage..for my depth of my relationship with my husband. I'm thankful that my husband is such a silly, nurturing father. I"m so thankful that he loves his job and the fact he has one. I'm so so very grateful he is no longer in the military. On that note, I'm so so so so very grateful to those that are. What a sacrifice those families make.

 

I'm thankful for a home filled with joy and laughter...especially at dinner time. It's the highlight of our day, taking fellowship with one another.

 

I'm thankful for my two bright shining girls who still have those pure gut laughs that only children seem to have. I feel so lucky and honored to be able to educate them myself and spend the time that I have with them now while we are financially stable. Having them in my life, inspires me to become a better person...to be the mom they deserve.

 

I'm thankful for the love and community we have found here. Our community of friends are family to us.

 

I'm thankful for the beautiful (and ever evolving) home we live in that my husband and I have put our blood, sweat and tears into. We are sooo lucky (I've been reminded again today) to own our own home and in such a breathtaking place.

 

I'm thankful for 65 degree days most days (I grew up in ARK and AZ...both hot places).

 

I'm grateful that I have the tools to be an intentional parent, to have the knowledge and insight to try not to react to my children but to be purposeful with them.

 

Lastly, (My list is getting really long) I'm grateful for nature's beauty. It rejuvenates me, feeds me.

 

ENVY.....??? Easy breezy on this one..... order. I'm not organized. I strive for it, I crave it. It's not one of my natural abilities. I would get a C on a report card. It's the ease that some have with this that I envy. Perhaps that's my impression and it's not ease but more of a purposeful choice for those that have more order.

 

It would be wonderful to have our families closer. The kids enjoy their cousins, grandparents and aunties so much. Our lives would be richer.

 

Thanks everyone for sharing. These are intimate thoughts. I feel honored to be part of such a wonderful, open and trusting :grouphug:online community.

 

Goodnight!

 

Julie in Monterey

[Heather in Neverland]

Wow, I woke up this morning and checked this thread and the stories have truly brought tears to my eyes!

 

I read the posts and find myself thinking "oh yeah, I am grateful for that too" Or "oh yeah, I am jealous of that too".

 

What a wonderful, diverse group of women we have here! Thank you for sharing!!! Anyone else want to play?

[Guest Virginia Dawn]

I'm envious of those whose level of education exceeds mine. I've got an insatiable thirst and not enough time or money to fill it. I wish I had the desire and energy to excercise more and clean more. I also wish I had some of the social skills that many of you exhibit.

 

I'm grateful that I haven't lost my mind. I'm grateful for a dh who is a friend who let's me be me. I'm grateful that the members of family and extended family are all basically healthy. I'm grateful that my dd found a good husband. I'm grateful that I made it through parenting my hardest child first. I'm grateful for my 4 sweet boys who are great learners. I'm grateful we have food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a roof over our heads. And in a way, I'm very grateful I don't have everything I want, because there are still things to work for and dream about. I'm also grateful for the world of nature that has the power to relax, inspire and awe. I'm grateful for my church family that knows how to show love better than I do.

[LisaNY]

On hard days I long for the predictability of physical functioning that so many have... the gift of being able to get up each day and know what your body will let you do that day... of being able to actually schedule field trips and other outings... or *anything* in a day. I like to have things planned out - and I know my kids would like more predictable structure.

 

 

 

(((Eliana))), I did not realize that you deal with physical problems. I am sorry.

 

I know what you mean about appreciating the ability to get out of bed every day. That is one of the things I appreciate as well. My mother (who lives with us) has suffered with Rheumatoid Arthritis for most of her life, and all of mine. She's had a knee and shoulder replacement, and by the grace of G-d, her other joints are holding on. She's had countless other surgeries as well. I truly know what it means to appreciate having a "good day" where you can get up and have little to no pain.

[mysticamethyst]

This has got to be the most supportive group of people I have ever met(or not met).

 

I am grateful for my kids and my dh. Every day they amaze me. I am grateful for my house, it has issue after issue, but I am not renting anymore. I am grateful for my computer and ability to get online whenever I want without having to go to library.

 

I am green with jealousy about not being able to have my kids in anything extra. Not being able to have anymore children, I would love to have more but that is just not going to happen for us. Most of all I think I am jealous of the ability to put things into words. I can never seem to arrange my thoughts and type them out.

 

:grouphug:HUGS TO ALL OF YOU:grouphug:

[HFClassicalAcademy]

This is a great thread!

 

I am jealous of those with bigger homes and bigger families.

 

I have 4 kids and want more. I am scared to death that for some reason I won't be able to have more kids. It has never been a problem, but for some reason...I'm terrified that it won't happen again. I go through this fear after every child!

 

I do love our home, but I do envy those with larger spaces. It's the materialistic in me. To have more than 3 bedrooms, a flat backyard, etc. Eventually that will come.

 

I am thankful for...

 

My husband. For the love we have for each other that only seems to grow as each day passes. That we have a passion for each other. That he accepts me as I am. I'm thankful for how hard-working he is and how much of a wonderful father he is. I appreciate all the studying, sacrificing, and extra hours he has put in so that he can achieve his dream. I love that he trusts me with everything...our kids, money...everything. He is the best person I know, my best friend forever. He is my everything.

 

I am thankful for my kids. They are my miracles. I love being with them and teaching them. I love that they teach me new things all the time. They are the reason for which I was put on this earth.

 

I am thankful for financial stability and a secure future. I am thankful that my DH is in a professional career that will provide for us greatly. I am thankful that, unless (God forbid) something happen to him, he will always have a job. We always give thanks for the gift of this and his health that allows him to work.

 

Liz

[lynn]

I am jealous of those that cook from scratch daily.

 

I am thankful for my husband and kids. It makes me so sad to hear mothers say things like "I can't wait for school to start" or "I lined up a VBS for my kids to go to every week this summer to get them out of my hair". Now I have toddler to teens age range and there are days I can't handle it but I do and I would not trade it for anything because every night ends with a "Goodnight mom, I love you" no matter what the battles were during the day.

[Donna T.]

This is a beautiful thread! What a way to start this day. I think we should try to keep this one on-going.

 

I'm not prone to jealousy but I guess I do have a wee little bit of envy when I hear of extra space for school (like whole extra rooms for goodness sake!) and new babies. And, I have to admit, I am in awe of those of you who are really confident in your choices. I feel like Rose - I walk around with my head in the clouds. I have a hard time focusing on the mundane. Sometimes, I think my feet are so far off the ground that I should be flying. I spend way too much time flying by the seat of my pants. I am not very organized but I can't blame anyone for that except myself! I pray for once and for all relief for chronic back pain, more energy, and physical strength.

 

I'm grateful for the two children that the Lord God gave me (after seven long years of fertility issues) because I know He didn't have to do it. I'm very grateful for my husband. He is so solid and loyal. I'm thankful we share a common, simple faith. I'm thankful for our church, our home, our income (not extravagant but certainly more than we came into this old world with), our extended family (very small but strong), and most of all, I'm thankful for the Lord God who redeemed me.

 

Blessings, All!

[Renee in NC]

I envy people who have husbands who make a comfortable living. I don't want stuff, but it would be nice to have health insurance for our family and not to qualify for food stamps. If I am really envious, I wish I could get guitar lessons for my 10yo and therapies for my special needs 7yo.

 

I am grateful for my husband who loves me, loves our dc, and really is my best friend. I am grateful for the soon to be 7 dc that I have.

[sadiegirl]

Wow...I need to remember this thread when I am feeling a major case of "want-itis."

 

This is a great thread because it recognizes our need to vent but it also reminds us that we ALL have something that others wish for and we take for granted!!!

 

What I am jealous of is a network---a church for kids and us to be connected in, friends for my kids--a feeling of belonging in our community that I had when I was a kid.

 

I am thankful my kids have 4 living, healthy grandparents. I am thankful for my family's health...something that we take for granted I know. The ability to hear bird's sing in my yard, see fish flop and turtles swim in our lake, smell my flowers,touch a rock that my son found with a funny texture, feel the heat from a fire in our firepits and taste the warmth and goodness of a smore cooked on it!

[Kelli in TN]

Okay, I had a good night's sleep so I am ready to play right this morning.

 

Envy

Dad's who like doing things consistently with their kids (playing ball, doing projects, playing Chess, etc)

Families that have peace and laughter and joy on a regular basis

Families in which each child is of "normal" intelligence and emotionally healthy

Families who have goals and work together towards those goals (financial goals, etc)

People who got to go to college. It was never a real option for me but I wanted it so badly.

 

Grateful

we have all the we need and much of what we want in the way of material goods.

My dh adores me and says I'm "hot":lol::lol::lol::lol: in spite of the fact that I am about as wide as I am in tall.

My seventeen year old daughter.....I don't even know how to describe what kind of person she is, and if I try the tears come. She has exceeded my wildest dreams of what a teenager could be about.

My church loves me. My church loves my family. We matter to them.

My 20 year old loves me. She honestly loves me. I never thought she would.

My 22 year old is happily married, just bought a house. He's a real grownup now.

All of my children are physically healthy. Illness around here is a sort of a fluke.

And I try to never forget how beautiful are these words "No, Honey, the doctor looked at it and is sure it is benign." Benign is my favorite word.

[Jenny in Atl]

I'm envious of those with...

healthy kids (no getting up a 2am to make sure your child is still alive)

skills to help make money for the family if needed (my fault and no one else's)

financial stability (don't want to be rich just comfortable)

the ability to spell and write out a correct sentence

warm loving extended families

the ability to travel

 

I'm grateful for...

my best friend (my DH) been with me for 25 years

my beautiful children

the wonderful animals that have shared a home with us, showing us a love of another sort

my determination to get up each morning and do it again, no matter what the day may bring.

the friends who have come and gone, and their lasting impact on who I am, and hope to become

[HRAAB]

Hmmm....

 

I'm jealous of those that have a strong support network whether it is extended family, friends, homeschool group, church. My parents are gone, I've wished my only sister would move to other side of the world, and when I found myself in a faith crisis, my friends disappeared. Our church community is huge and I just haven't connected with anyone there. Right now if I needed help with something, I don't have anyone to call. I would love to sit at my kitchen table with a pitcher of iced tea and a good girlfriend.

 

I'm very, very grateful for my husband. He works hard, manages our money wisely so I can stay home, puts up with me, my hormones plus those of our 5 daughters. He's my hero. My children are healthy. My older daughters still speak to us (parents) even though we made major mistakes with them; relationships are improving.

 

Janet

[Tracey in TX]

This is such a beautiful thread. Heather in NC, thanks for starting this!

 

envy:

family sit-down dinners

extended family peace and joy

organization

serenity

grandparents who want to be part of their grandchildren's lives

 

gratitude:

family who loves me unconditionally

laughter, hugs

DH who loves me (and drives me bonkers :))

DH makes good income..

which allows me to be a SAHM

5 fabulously healthy, happy, bright children (This is emotional, as we were told to expect CP, mental retardation for our triplets. One baby had severe brain bleed and is the very picture of the All American girl.)

freedom to express discontent, both in home and in our country

and the Lord above, who really makes this crazy life all worthwhile!

[Prairie~Phlox]

I'm envious of those that have decent health insurance and make use of it, not that we have anything wrong, but there's always that "what-if" I've come a long way with being at peace where we are financially.

 

I'm also envious of those of you that have more than one green square. I don't really post much, but seems like some of you just get reps for just being!

 

I'm thankful that I have three fairly healthy kids and I'm thankful that I don't long for more children and at peace with the number that we do have. I'm thankful we have a roof over our head and that I'm able to have a small garden and that I'm about a mile from the store.

 

~Phlox

[Sharon in SC]

Short and sweet due to time constraints: Source of envy (still on the note of kitchens) - cabinet doors! :-P; Source of gratitude: God's faithfulness!!!!!

[Nakia]

Heather,

You rock! But of course I already knew that from the FIAR board!

 

I am a little jealous of those who have a "school room". It would be nice not to have to remove the owl pellets and globe from the table before we eat dinner! :D

 

I have a list a mile long of things I am grateful for. Most importantly I am thankful for the gift of salvation that our Lord gave us through his son Jesus Christ. Also I am thankful for a husband who loves me like crazy, works hard and tucks all of us girls in bed every night. Also my beautiful daughters. Each of them is precious and have so many gifts and attributes. And they are healthy.

[laughing lioness]

What a joy to read the posts. I am touched by what has been said!

 

For me:

I am jealous of those with stable finances and those who live debt-free.

Those with extended family that love and care for them and those who experience community outside of their nuclear family.

Those whose dh have a job they love going to.

 

 

On the other hand:

I am crazily thankful for my dh. God-fearing, kind hearted, compassionate, passionate, irritatingly intellectual Viking of a man.

My children. After my salvation I count them as God's greatest gift to me. Every one of them are amazing, beautiful, talented, tender, smart, funny, innocent and Godly.

Our home and acerage.

My education and degrees. My dh's education and degrees. My children's education.

Living in America. Living in freedom. Living with women's rights. Living in a place with at least the hope of equality for men and women.

The ability to homeschool.

Books. Books. Books.

Being literate.

Having faith and knowing God.

Gardening.

Health.

[Caroline]

I wish I could home school my children. But I after school them, and it is working well. But I envy you all who spend your life teaching your own children.

 

I envy people who don't have to read every label to check for gluten. And I envy people who know they didn't poison their child for the first three years of her life. And I envy people who don't live in fear of juvenile diabetes every day. She doesn't have it yet, but her risk factors are high. ( And I didn't know I felt that way until right now.)

 

I am thankful for my children, wonderful husband, and extended family. I am thankful that, for the most part, my children are healthy. I love having financial stability. I am thankful for my dd's medical study that gave us the clues to celiac and will give us warning if she develops diabetes.

 

I just wanted to add that I am thankful for you all putting up with me even though I don't home school.