********* Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 (edited) I'd also ask that you PLEASE not quote me, as I've been waffling back and forth about posting this, and very likely will delete it eventually. Edited February 1, 2012 by bethanyniez Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiana Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Bethany, I really thank you for posting this. It's not just abortion -- but when we're talking about any sin in general, we shouldn't assume that none of the group has done things which deeply trouble them -- you never know what your friends are going through. And if people are casually denigrating anyone who would even consider doing a specific thing that I also did -- well, I feel even less able to discuss it at all now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelBee Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 And many are married. When I heard that I starting crying. So many assume that it is young mothers, single and no support. It is simply untrue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 You are such a nice person for trying to help. If anyone needs additional help I understand Rachel's Vineyard Ministries is a wonderful program. Rachel's Vineyard is a ministry of Priests for Life. Rachel's Vineyard has a broadly Roman Catholic ethos with a Catholic mass celebrated as an integral part of the retreat, but also runs non-denominational retreats for non-Catholics Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 Bethany, I really thank you for posting this. It's not just abortion -- but when we're talking about any sin in general, we shouldn't assume that none of the group has done things which deeply trouble them -- you never know what your friends are going through. And if people are casually denigrating anyone who would even consider doing a specific thing that I also did -- well, I feel even less able to discuss it at all now. Very true, Kiana. We should be careful in our speech, for sure. And your bolded sentence is one of the main reasons Christian women who have had an abortion do NOT share about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 And many are married. When I heard that I starting crying. So many assume that it is young mothers, single and no support. It is simply untrue. Quite right. Looking up statistics in regards to just who the women are who have abortions can be eye-opening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Bethany, but when we're talking about any sin in general, we shouldn't assume that none of the group has done things which deeply trouble them -- you never know what your friends are going through. And if people are casually denigrating anyone who would even consider doing a specific thing that I also did -- well, I feel even less able to discuss it at all now. I had a close friend make a denigrating remark about young, pregnant, unmarried mothers. Something about how it would be a shame for said mother to keep her baby, and the child would be much better off having been put up for adoption. I smiled and mentioned that when I was pregnant with my oldest a family member thought the same too. My "mistake" is 14 now and God has created beauty from ashes. I was not annoyed with her, but I believe I challenged her thinking on the issue. She is now one of my closest friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I have experience with one of my friends confiding to me that she had an abortion when she was 18. She was about 35 when she told me. In hindsite I believe it was my compassionate comments (I know you all are thinking Scarlett? Compassionate?! ) that led her to be able to confide in me. It tormented her. I am so glad I didn't add to her guilt with hurtful comments before I knew. And ftr, my comments absolutely made it clear that I believe it to be a sin, but I did express deep compassion for a woman who had made that choice especially young girls who are strong armed into it by their parents. Turned out that was exactly what had happened to her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I was on the table with my oldest. On the table. He was one week over the limit. I was so tiny they miscalculated his age. So I completely know what it takes to get to that place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vanna Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 This is a great thread. I have a friend who suffered through an abortion. I see that the mothers as a much victims of this crime as the babies are. I have no reason to speak disparagingly about someone, Christian or otherwise, who's had one. They really have no idea what they've done. BTW, hope you all have seen Ray Comfort's 180 video on the subject of abortion -- enlightening!!! It's a bit longer than your average youtube, but worth every minute! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 THis was a topic at our Sanctity of Life service at church. While we are strongly against abortion, we want to be very supportive of the women (and men) that have been affected by this and be supportive of them. Our local crisis pregnancy center has some women on staff that had abortions themselves and now what to counsel/support other women who have been in the same position. I think that this is a very much needed area of ministry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I was on the table with my oldest. On the table. He was one week over the limit. I was so tiny they miscalculated his age. So I completely know what it takes to get to that place. (((Justamouse))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Speaking of men....my brother had a gf in his youth who had an abortion. I believe he was very traumatized by that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I learned how common this is years ago, when I was a very active member of a Christian attachment parenting community online. We all had the kind of closeness that made some of our members feel safe enough to tell us of their experiences. My life was forever changed by their testimonies. I was so thankful they were able to find spiritual healing and a belief in God after being in such a dark place. I learned that abortion always breaks at least two hearts, but one of those hearts might find some rest and peace if we'll just reach out and love as Jesus taught us to love. I learned to love women as much as I love unborn babies. Love has to be like that, or it isn't love at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I was on the table with my oldest. On the table. He was one week over the limit. I was so tiny they miscalculated his age. So I completely know what it takes to get to that place. :grouphug: I love you. I'm so glad you are on these boards, every day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I've had two people confide in me. One was a non-church going relative, but would identify as Christian. Another was a non-Christian, but had been on the church bus with me every week growing up. One was single and the other was, at the time, unmarried but pressured by her now husband to abort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 This is a great thread. I have a friend who suffered through an abortion. I see that the mothers as a much victims of this crime as the babies are. I have no reason to speak disparagingly about someone, Christian or otherwise, who's had one. They really have no idea what they've done. BTW, hope you all have seen Ray Comfort's 180 video on the subject of abortion -- enlightening!!! It's a bit longer than your average youtube, but worth every minute! While I think that vida is amazing, it's s not really healing to women who suffer in silence. It is more of a tool to get people to change this minds on the law. But if you've hadonedo not click through. On kindlesorry for typos. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 :grouphug: I love you. I'm so glad you are on these boards, every day. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 While I think that vida is amazing, it's s not really healing to women who suffer in silence. It is more of a tool to get people to change this minds on the law. But if you've hadonedo not click through. On kindlesorry for typos. I strongly agree with Justamouse. I fully support Way of the Master and what they do through their ministry, including the 180 Movie. However, the 180 movie is NOT healing for women who have had an abortion. That's not it's purpose. It's purpose is great, however. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denise in Florida Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I learned how common this is years ago, when I was a very active member of a Christian attachment parenting community online. We all had the kind of closeness that made some of our members feel safe enough to tell us of their experiences. My life was forever changed by their testimonies. I was so thankful they were able to find spiritual healing and a belief in God after being in such a dark place. I learned that abortion always breaks at least two hearts, but one of those hearts might find some rest and peace if we'll just reach out and love as Jesus taught us to love. I learned to love women as much as I love unborn babies. Love has to be like that, or it isn't love at all. :iagree: (bolded part) (bolding mine) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mo2 Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I was on the table with my oldest. On the table. He was one week over the limit. I was so tiny they miscalculated his age. So I completely know what it takes to get to that place. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Great thread Bethany. Can I add though, that it's not only Christian women who had an abortion before they became Christians - some choose this path while they already self-identify as a Christian. I learned close-up how heartbroken a mother can be making this decision. :crying: (not me, and I still think it's wrong - but now I have understanding, compassion, and love.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 This is not exactly on topic (my very own spin-off post!!) but 1) (This is not my story, so I'm protecting names.) My only sibling is an adopted sibling, a child conceived in one of the situations that most people say would be an "allowable" reason to have an abortion. My sibling's birth mother chose to carry the baby to term and then give the baby up for adoption. How I and my family have been blessed to have this sibling and the courageous woman who carried and bore that baby, all those many years ago, in our family. In the last ten years, we have come to know her and her later-born children, and they are extended family now, too. Truly, God has restored and healed the hole in her heart, and He gave my sibling's children an extra, loving "grandparent" in the process. Woo, hoo! 2) On a sad note, even when a young couple chooses to carry a child to term, marry, and raise the child, the church often stigmatizes them and makes it know that the circumstances make them a second-class citizen. I've had friends tell me that even their younger children have been stigmatized for an older child's indiscretion. I was floored. How pitiful we are! God help us to see with love and not with judgement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 Great thread Bethany. Can I add though, that it's not only Christian women who had an abortion before they became Christians - some choose this path while they already self-identify as a Christian. I learned close-up how heartbroken a mother can be making this decision. :crying: (not me, and I still think it's wrong - but now I have understanding, compassion, and love.) I completely agree, and did not mean to imply that women could not/do not identify as Christian *when* they have an abortion. Which is why I added the statistic that 65% of women identify as protestant or Catholic WHEN they have an abortion. And your last paragraph is exactly the reason I began this thread. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Statistics show that 40% of US women have had an abortion. What you say WRT how we should be treating others is absolutely on-target. I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virg Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Thank you so much for sharing this. I can be outspoken and I will be very careful of this in the future. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 What you say WRT how we should be treating others is absolutely on-target. I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. Really? I didn't know that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelBee Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I was on the table with my oldest. On the table. He was one week over the limit. I was so tiny they miscalculated his age. So I completely know what it takes to get to that place.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beatusduo Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 There is a ministry that addresses the issue of crisis pregnancy. I am part of a parish that supports the Gabriel Project and I am actively involved. If you Google Gabriel project you can find a parish that supports the program. http://www.clevelandcatholiccharities.org/prolife/Articles/Gabriel_Project%20Insert%20v2.pdf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
livetoread Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I've had a fair number of women confide in me, some when I worked as a therapist, and some for whatever reason. I think that Christian women are less likely to confide in those who think it is wrong no matter what, and in those who expect the emotional toll to be large. It is quite true that some women deeply regret having an abortion and they struggle with the aftermath. However, it is also quite true that many women don't. They see it as the best choice they could have made under difficult circumstances and they move on. They might wish they hadn't gotten to that point, but they recognize once there, abortion was the best option. And yes, that's true of Christian women too. This is very difficult for those who see abortion as wrong no matter what to hear. They are able to be loving and compassionate to those who deeply regret what they did, but don't know what to do with those who aren't so regretful. I understand why, but I also understand why women who aren't tormented (and there are a lot) wouldn't be confiding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amber in SJ Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I wonder about the statistics as well. My medical records show that I have had three "spontaneous abortions." I know many women who have had miscarriages so that may account for the high numbers. Amber in SJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. I've wondered this too, since I had a d and c after miscarriage. I have also wondered if all of the medical statistics about cancers, etc apply to me since I had a d and c Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ocelotmom Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 (edited) And many are married. When I heard that I starting crying. So many assume that it is young mothers, single and no support. It is simply untrue. Yes. Many women getting abortions are women who already have kids. Who know exactly what pregnancy and childraising involves, and exactly what resources are available (or not) to their families. Who don't have a societally accepted option for celibacy (I doubt most of the men saying "just keep your legs closed" would accept that from their own wives). My third likely would have been aborted if I hadn't had my husband's wholehearted enthusiasm about the pregnancy. I had to ask him for a dollar to go to the dollar store to get a pregnancy test because we were so broke that I rarely even had pocket change. I was in clinicals in my last semester of nursing school at the time, and every day I'd walk out, nauseous and exhausted, past the abortion protestors offering "alternatives" and wondering what the hell they really had to offer me. I was legitimately worried about the survival of my already existing family. Prayers, attending parenting classes in exchange for diapers and baby clothing, or a free ultrasound was certainly not the sort of help my family needed. I have very mixed feelings about abortion. I think it's a decision that is made during a time when it is very hard to think rationally and with a long-term view. I think it's a decision a lot of women would not make if we had better societal safety nets and less stigma. So, I'm undecided how I feel about it from a moral standpoint... but have absolutely nothing but compassion for women who find themselves facing that decision. I know several women who have either had abortions or have said that they would have one if they became pregnant again. Every one of them has a heartbreaking and understandable reason for it, for which support aimed towards young single women would be utterly inappropriate. Edited January 31, 2012 by ocelotmom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lauranc Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Speaking of men....my brother had a gf in his youth who had an abortion. I believe he was very traumatized by that. :iagree: Absolutely agree that it can be very traumatizing for men too. I have a similar 'story' to what you mentioned, and I know he was just devastated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. I have wondered that too. I had a missed miscarriage years ago and went through a D&E, which was then listed on the hospital bills as an abortion, which seems to me inaccurate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Veritaserum Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 What you say WRT how we should be treating others is absolutely on-target. I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. Yes, I wondered this as well. Also, termination for medical reasons (fatal condition for the baby or life-threatening pregnancy for the mother) are also technically abortions, but they are a different category from abortions done due to poor timing/finances, rape, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 One thing to keep in mind is the demographics of those who get abortions. Blacks and Hispanics have a disproportionately high share of abortions in this country, and whites & Asians have disproportionately low shares. So it's misleading to suggest that 40% of the female friends of any given woman would be expected to have had an abortion. If most of the women in her social circle are black or Hispanic, then the percentage is likely higher than 40%. If most of them are white or Asian, then the percentage is likely lower than 40%. The only women I know who are open about having had one or more abortions are now Pro-Life activists, and most of them are black. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chicagoshannon Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 What you say WRT how we should be treating others is absolutely on-target. I just was wondering what these statistics include... because a routine d&c after IUFD would be included as an abortion for statistical purposes (depending upon how the information is gathered), as well as possibly a miscarriage (spontaneous abortion, but has been lumped with all for some statistical purposes). Sometimes these statistics are difficult to read as absolute. I was thinking the same thing. 99% of the time miscarriages and d&c is included in abortion statistics. I would like to know if that 65% statistic is foe elective abortions. I'm sure that Christians have elective abortions but I doubt that the number is that high. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 :iagree: Absolutely agree that it can be very traumatizing for men too. I have a similar 'story' to what you mentioned, and I know he was just devastated. I have a similar story also. My son's girlfriend. Though he begged and pleaded and I couldn't understand him through his tears, she did it anyway. He even brought her here so I could talk to her, tell her that we were completely supportive and would help. Hecried for days. I cried for days too. I still don't think he's over it. So men become the walking wounded, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I have a similar story also. My son's girlfriend. Though he begged and pleaded and I couldn't understand him through his tears, she did it anyway. He even brought her here so I could talk to her, tell her that we were completely supportive and would help. Hecried for days. I cried for days too. I still don't think he's over it. So men become the walking wounded, too. :( That breaks my heart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truscifi Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 This is a great thread. I have a friend who suffered through an abortion. I see that the mothers as a much victims of this crime as the babies are. I have no reason to speak disparagingly about someone, Christian or otherwise, who's had one. They really have no idea what they've done. BTW, hope you all have seen Ray Comfort's 180 video on the subject of abortion -- enlightening!!! It's a bit longer than your average youtube, but worth every minute! I think the point of this thread is that they do in fact know what they've done and many are very conflicted about it, and feel deep grief, but still decide it is the best (or only) option for them at that time. A friend had one years ago due to a serious health condition that, while it would not have prevented her from having a healthy baby, she felt it would have prevented her from being a good mother and providing for that baby. It was heartbreaking for her and her husband. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaners Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 One thing to keep in mind is the demographics of those who get abortions. Blacks and Hispanics have a disproportionately high share of abortions in this country, and whites & Asians have disproportionately low shares. So it's misleading to suggest that 40% of the female friends of any given woman would be expected to have had an abortion. If most of the women in her social circle are black or Hispanic, then the percentage is likely higher than 40%. If most of them are white or Asian, then the percentage is likely lower than 40%. The only women I know who are open about having had one or more abortions are now Pro-Life activists, and most of them are black. Neither of the women who have told me that they have had more than one abortion is black or hispanic. One is white and the other is Asian. Obviously it isn't statistically significant, but that's what I've seen among my friends. Neither of them are activists, but one of them did tell me she would ask me if my husband and I would adopt if she had another pregnancy. I'd be very interested to see what the statistics are for the age today of women who have had abortions. I am on the younger end of mothers here. When I was in college, I never saw or heard abortion discussed with any associated stigma. It was just made out to be an acceptable option if you happened to get pregnant. I'm not sure how that compares to the experience of others, but it does make me wonder if it is more frequent in my age range or just discussed more openly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Neither of the women who have told me that they have had more than one abortion is black or hispanic. One is white and the other is Asian. Obviously it isn't statistically significant, but that's what I've seen among my friends. Neither of them are activists, but one of them did tell me she would ask me if my husband and I would adopt if she had another pregnancy. I'd be very interested to see what the statistics are for the age today of women who have had abortions. I am on the younger end of mothers here. When I was in college, I never saw or heard abortion discussed with any associated stigma. It was just made out to be an acceptable option if you happened to get pregnant. I'm not sure how that compares to the experience of others, but it does make me wonder if it is more frequent in my age range or just discussed more openly. I just read a book that said that Asian-Americans have a pretty high abortion rate in the US, higher than whites--IIRC the number was 35%. I do not recall the figure for whites. (The book focused on sex selection--the practice of aborting girl babies because a boy is desired. It's pretty common in Asia, on the rise in Eastern Europe, and persists in pockets in the US/other places, which is why the statistic was included.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I'd be very interested to see what the statistics are for the age today of women who have had abortions. I am on the younger end of mothers here. When I was in college, I never saw or heard abortion discussed with any associated stigma. It was just made out to be an acceptable option if you happened to get pregnant. I'm not sure how that compares to the experience of others, but it does make me wonder if it is more frequent in my age range or just discussed more openly. I've personally noticed the opposite. The women in my mom's generation (Baby Boomers who came of age in the late '60's or early '70's) tend to be far more in favor of legalized abortion-on-demand while the ones my age (tail end of Gen X) or younger tend to be much more Pro-Life. Even of the ones who are in favor of keeping the current laws on abortion, most are still personally opposed to abortion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 Thank you for having the courage to step forward and make such a kind offer. It's quite a sobering thought to consider those statistics. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stages Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I know a woman who has had two abortions- the first was when she was 17 for the typical reasons (family disowning, disinterested father, etc.) This happened in the mid-seventies, I believe. The second was much more complicated. She had a young daughter and was going through a divorce when she got pregnant. At that time, in that state, she would not be able to divorce while pregnant. Her husband was extremely physically abusive, and the environment was not a safe place for her daughter. She had been having an affair, and was quite certain the baby was the other man's. If it had come out that she was pregnant with another man's child, it would be very likely that her husband would get custody of her oldest daughter. It is also very likely her husband would have caused great harm to both of them. She did what she felt was necessary to protect herself and her daughter. I know this woman still struggles with the guilt, some twenty seven years later. Fifteen years ago, she became a Christian, and though she knows God forgives her, she can't forgive herself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimson Wife Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I just read a book that said that Asian-Americans have a pretty high abortion rate in the US, higher than whites--IIRC the number was 35%. I do not recall the figure for whites. (The book focused on sex selection--the practice of aborting girl babies because a boy is desired. It's pretty common in Asia, on the rise in Eastern Europe, and persists in pockets in the US/other places, which is why the statistic was included.) Asians are lumped into the "other" category in the abortion statistics, which collectively make up 7% of all abortions vs. 8% of the population aged 15-44. Sex selection may or may not be a serious problem (I don't have any actual data on that), but Asians have a much lower rate of teen pregnancies (it's less than half the overall U.S. average). So it does not appear that they are overrepresented among those having abortions the way that blacks and Hispanics are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted January 31, 2012 Author Share Posted January 31, 2012 Ladies, I realize there are many factors in the statistics, including race, age, income level, medical procedures that are not the 'typical' abortion. I was in no way trying to mislead or 'overstate' the situation. It's just the statistics I have. My point was, we all very likely have one, if not several, good friends who have been through this, and we also likely have no idea. As far as the 'they have no idea what they've done' statement by a pp? That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about. Many do. Many really, really do have a deep, painful, excruciating idea exactly what they've done. You (general you) could not judge them any more harshly for it than they judge themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
staceyobu Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 I've wondered this too, since I had a d and c after miscarriage. I have also wondered if all of the medical statistics about cancers, etc apply to me since I had a d and c Some people don't realize that all miscarriages are technically abortions. They are considered spontaneous or missed abortions instead of induced abortion. If you are put in the hospital with a miscarriage, your paperwork will say "abortion". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted January 31, 2012 Share Posted January 31, 2012 4 of my dearest friends had abortions. All were in different stages of life and had different reasons. One invited me to a memorial service for her unborn child, about 20 years after the abortion. It was the most moving and significant service. I can't imagine having to make such a decision--for me, it'd be gut-wrenching. I try not to compare "sins"--I'm better than you are because I've never...kind of thing. Even if you think abortion is ok, I don't know of a single person who would do it nonchalently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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