If profanity bothers you, why does it? If not, why not?

[3littlekeets]

Why do you think that some words get censored by social convention and cause upset, when others don't (e.g. "Sh!+" bothers but "poop" doesn't?) The referent is the same thing, but we decide one is vulgar and the other is not. I hear "educated people can avoid them," but WHY should they? Who decided that certain words were taboo, and why do we actually get so upset by them?

 

I'm not talking about words used to insult, such as calling someone a B!+C*, but using the words in animated discourse.

 

Would love to hear your thoughts....

[Mrs Mungo]

Particularly taboo words bother me, but most curse words do not really bother me. Some words in the vulgar/crude but not swearing category also bother me.

[Gwenhwyfar]

none of it really bothers me... they're just words. a bunch of letters shoved together, y'know?

[Peela]

Profanity doesn't actually bother me much, and i think it can be used to express oneself at times in a way that is more challenging with less colourful language. But when people use a lot of profanity, to me it is often a sign of low socioeconomic status, perhaps lack of education, because it is a poor way to communicate one's feelings to use a lot, and it does portray one as rather illiterate in some way. But I have never had much of a problem with normal speech being peppered with ocasional swear words.

Dh went through a phase a few months back where a friend who is a Franciscan monk mentioned to him that he swears a lot. Dh decided to stop swearing so much and he has, which has probably been better for the kids.

[Tutor]

Cursing doesn't bother me, but the lack of thought and purpose behind most cursing does... as does the lack of thought or purpose behind any speech. I often hear curse words used as filler (like using "uh" or "um" or "like") or simply to shock or to fit in.

 

I try not to swear in front of people I know it will offend, but I have been known to let it fly when I am particularly upset or when I feel a certain profanity is the best word for a particular situation. In the first instance, however, it is often a sign to me that I am losing control, and I will try to calm myself down and regain my composure. I also find that I curse more freely in front of my dh because I am usually feeling very raw and vulnerable in those instances.

 

ETA: One of the reasons I assigned Taylor Mali's poem

to my girls this year was so that we could discuss the use of profanity in speech and writing. (Warning - link contains profanity, obviously ;)) Edited September 19, 2010 by Tutor

[IsabelC]

Does profanity bother me? Yes and no.

 

I don't agree with the whole idea of words being taboo, and I'm not particularly sensitive to particular words. You can talk like the proverbial sailor and that's fine with me.

 

However, people being disrespectful to others bothers me, regardless of the language used. Thus while I'm fine with somebody saying "Oh, expletive!" when they stub their toe, I might not want to be called "You expletive expletive".

 

With the children, that's how we present the topic. We have a rule that putdowns aren't allowed in any form, and we also ask them to try and be considerate of other people's feelings, which includes not saying certain words in front of their grandmother.

 

Also, I personally don't use very much coarse language. Why bother to say things that will be offensive to some people when there is such a rich variety of other things that you can say instead?

[Night Elf]

I'm not bothered by curse words because they're just the same thing as saying gosh darnit or rats. I do hate hearing people, usually young people (20s and lower) use curse words in a ridiculously large number, like every 3rd word. Cursing shouldn't be such a big part of conversation.

[Corraleno]

Profanity directed at inanimate objects or at the general situation doesn't bother me, but profanity directed at another person sometimes does (e.g. calling a woman a b* or a c*). I once worked with a guy who only seemed to have a single adjective, adverb, and verb in his vocabulary, and they all began with "f" (and now that I think of it, f'er seemed to be his only pronoun as well). That did get tiresome after a while!

 

Jackie

[Miss Sherry]

In general, I think that using profanity shows a disrespect for one's self and others. But like many other habits it can easily be picked up simply by being around others practicing it whether the one using it has a general attitude of disrespect or not.

 

Copied and linked below is an article on the subject for those who respect the Bible and would like to read an article written from a christian perspective.

Christians and Profanity. What Does the Bible Say ?

“What’s the big deal about profanity?” It’s a question I sometimes hear from young people who consider profanity a normal part of modern communication. Indeed, some Christian leaders in supposedly “cutting-edge” ministries use profanity in their presentations in an attempt to relate to the street language many unsaved people use.

What is profanity? The word profane literally means “outside the temple.” The term originally identified people or things that were secular as opposed to religious. The proliferation of profanity in American culture indicates secularization and an attack on Christian values. Media ratings of movies, music and videos continue to use language as a criterion, but standards of censorship on public airwaves are clearly eroding.

Profanity is used for shock value in expressing anger and humor. The words often are associated with sexuality and filth. Names of the Deity are used to bring additional potency and irreverence to the expressions. It is worth noting in our politically correct culture that the blasphemous use of the names of God and Jesus Christ are not regarded as “hate speech.”

The Bible recognizes the power of words. God spoke His creation into existence, and the gift of speech is one aspect of man’s creation in the image of God (Gen. 2:19-20). In the revelation of God’s law, words as well as actions are assigned moral values. Lying, blasphemy, taking the Lord’s name in vain, and cursing are examples of sinful speech forbidden in the Mosaic Law.

The New Testament also commands believers to be pure in speech by controlling their tongues: “With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men who are made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things should not be this way” (James 3:9-10). Christians should honor the purpose of speech by using our mouths to praise God and leading others to obey the Lord through faith in Jesus Christ. Every word we speak should be “gracious” and “seasoned with salt” (Col. 4:6). We should always ask, “What would Jesus say?”

Christians are called upon to live differently and to act differently than the world of unbelievers. I do not need to speak profanity to win a cursing unbeliever anymore than I need to drink alcohol to win an alcoholic. The words of Scripture have all the potency and power we need to reach the heart of the lost.

“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable to You, LORD, my rock and my Redeemer” (Psalm 19:14).

By Hal Lane.

http://erlc.com/article/christians-and-profanity-what-does-the-bible-say/

Edited September 19, 2010 by Miss Sherry
forgot to include title

[cjbeach]

I do hate hearing people, usually young people (20s and lower) use curse words in a ridiculously large number, like every 3rd word. Cursing shouldn't be such a big part of conversation.

Drives.me.nuts.

I hear this a lot. I'm not sure if it is because my dh is from Jersey;) but oh boy, his family (including my MIL) curse more than any family I've encountered. They're bright people but yuck! Enough already, buy a thesaurus.

When you're really angry, yes...sometimes certain words just fit your passion at the moment, but to roll it off of your tongue as your only adjective, verb, noun, and interjection is harsh. I can't listen to it.

[Oops, duplicate account :/]

A wise older woman once counseled me to overlook the swear word(s) and just focus on what the person is really trying to communicate. That's what I done ever since. :001_wub:

[Britomart]

I differentiate between profanity and vulgarity. Profanity tends to bother me, but vulgarity doesn't bother me as often.

 

Profanity would be taking religious words and sentiments and using them flippantly. In many cases, it's hearing the name of someone I love being used as an equivalent of "oh sh**", and I don't think anyone would like hearing the name of a loved one used that way.

 

Vulgarity is, I think, often inappropriate, because who wants to be reminded publicly of excrement and/or sex at, say, the dinner table? But sometimes it's appropriate - if you just had something very painful happen (drop a heavy box on your toe, say), well, the previously mentioned "oh, sh**" seems about right. Stubbing your toe makes you about as happy as dog poop makes you, so why not say so? :)

 

I do like people saying what they mean though, so I wish more people would use vulgarity only thoughtfully, only when they really mean it. If you use it all the time, it stops meaning anything at all.

[Britomart]

A wise older woman once counseled me to overlook the swear word(s) and just focus on what the person is really trying to communicate. That's what I done ever since. :001_wub:

 

Oh, I really like this. I have my opinions on it (see above), but this is a great reminder to focus on the person, not the method of communication. Especially when they might not know any better, or might be in great distress. If someone's in distress, it's not a time to scold about profanity.

[Oops, duplicate account :/]

A wise older woman once counseled me to overlook the swear word(s) and just focus on what the person is really trying to communicate. That's what I done ever since. :001_wub:

 

"And above all things have fervent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8

[Britomart]

Why do you think that some words get censored by social convention and cause upset, when others don't (e.g. "Sh!+" bothers but "poop" doesn't?)

 

Okay, I know this is my third post but, I'm an English major and love this stuff.

 

fwiw, a lot of our vulgarities, in English, come from the Saxons, whereas a lot of our "nice" words come from the Normans. After William the Conquerer came through, the Saxons became the lower class, and their words also became "lower class". So you have the more refined "intestines" and the earthier "guts" (to pick a non-censored example).

 

That's not all of it, but it's part of it.

[Corraleno]

Why do you think that some words get censored by social convention and cause upset, when others don't (e.g. "Sh!+" bothers but "poop" doesn't?) The referent is the same thing, but we decide one is vulgar and the other is not.

This reminds me of something I once read about how biologists categorize excrement: "If it's on the ground, it's poop; if it's under the microscope, its scat; if it's running down the back of your neck, it's sh*t." :lol:

 

Jackie

[Miss Sherry]

The idea of profanity makes me think of a particular person who had the most extreme habit of using profanity and vulgarity that I have ever witnessed. He did not just curse, he expanded by saying all kinds of vulgar things. He was married, then divorced, by someone I know but haven't seen in many years.

 

You could say anything at all to him and he would come back with a vulgar comment. It was intolerable. It turned out that his profanity was a manifestation of a very disturbed mind.

Myself, and others, ended up being subpoened by the DA's office to be a character witness against him because he had sexually abused a child. This was not all that surprising, considering how little control he had over his speech, and how ugly and vulgar the things he was constantly saying were. Someone from the DA's office told me that his doctor had testified that he was a psychopath.

 

He ended up doing time in prison, but on unrelated charges. He was driving drunk and hit two teenagers who were stopped at a stop sign head on and killed them. He made the comment that they should not have been out driving. He didn't seem to care one bit that he had killed them. It was their fault for being on the road. Unbelievable.

 

This is an extreme example, I realize. However, nothing good whatsoever is communicated by profanity. If a person has an unhealthy mind the profanity will only become more and more dominant in their speech.

 

I do not think that everyone who uses profanity has a sick mind.I doubt there are many people who can honestly say they have never used a swear word. Using a swear word here and there is much different than the mindset of the person I have described here. But I think that people who have very sick minds will tend to be the one's to say the most vulgar and profane things.

Edited September 19, 2010 by Miss Sherry

[Tutor]

I differentiate between profanity and vulgarity. Profanity tends to bother me, but vulgarity doesn't bother me as often.

 

Profanity would be taking religious words and sentiments and using them flippantly. In many cases, it's hearing the name of someone I love being used as an equivalent of "oh sh**", and I don't think anyone would like hearing the name of a loved one used that way.

 

Vulgarity is, I think, often inappropriate, because who wants to be reminded publicly of excrement and/or sex at, say, the dinner table? But sometimes it's appropriate - if you just had something very painful happen (drop a heavy box on your toe, say), well, the previously mentioned "oh, sh**" seems about right. Stubbing your toe makes you about as happy as dog poop makes you, so why not say so? :)

 

I do like people saying what they mean though, so I wish more people would use vulgarity only thoughtfully, only when they really mean it. If you use it all the time, it stops meaning anything at all.

 

Thank you for your posts on this topic. Fascinating and thoughtful.

[Pretty in Pink]

Profanity doesn't really bother me. I grew up with up. When I'm hanging out with the homeschool group or at church I do not swear; when my siblings and I are up late playing poker we do swear quite a bit. Sometimes my dh and I swear when we are joking around.

[Oops, duplicate account :/]

The idea of profanity, makes me think of a particular person who had the most extreme habit of using profanity that I have ever witnessed. He did not just curse, he expanded by saying all kinds of vulgar things. He was married, then divorced, by someone I know but haven't seen in many years.

 

You could say anything at all to him and he would come back with a vulgar comment. It was intolerable. It turned out that his profanity was really a manifestation of a very disturbed mind.

Myself, and others, ended up being subpoened by the DA's office to be a character witness against him because he had sexually abused a child. This was not all that surprising, considering how little control he had over his speech, and how ugly and vulgar the things he was constantly saying were. Someone from the DA's office told me that his doctor had testified that he was a psychopath.

 

He ended up doing time in prison, but on unrelated charges. He was driving drunk and hit two teenagers who were stopped at a stop sign head on and killed them. He made the comment that they should not have been out driving. He didn't seem to care one bit that he had killed them. It was their fault for being on the road. Unbelievable.

 

This is an extreme example, I realize. However, nothing good whatsoever is communicated by profanity. If a person has an unhealthy mind the profanity will only become more and more dominant in their speech.

 

I do not think that everyone who uses profanity has a sick mind. But I do think that people who do have very sick minds will tend to be the one's to say the most vulgar and profane things.

 

Well my Grandma has spent her life serving her family and some pretty pathetic ppl she has met in her lifetime. She is the ideal of selflessnes to me. She has and would give you her last dollar.

 

a. She is not a Christian.

b. She would put a sailor to shame with her mouth. I mean shocking word choice.

 

Maybe why I'm so compassionate in this area is because *I* struggle not using profanity, and when I'm stressed especially. It is how I grow up and honestly...I don't know if I'll ever break this habit this side of heaven. I HATE it. I want to change. I'm better, but when I feel anger and frustration it's like these emotions are tied to a curse word adn they fly. Having children has helped and is sobering because I don't want them to grow up hearing and learning these from me. But still, I do it. Thank God for his grace and long suffering and love.

 

That's where I'm coming from anyways. All valid points though.

[Miss Sherry]

Well my Grandma has spent her life serving her family and some pretty pathetic ppl she has met in her lifetime. She is the ideal of selflessnes to me. She has and would give you her last dollar.

 

a. She is not a Christian.

b. She would put a sailor to shame with her mouth. I mean shocking word choice.

 

Maybe why I'm so compassionate in this area is because *I* struggle not using profanity, and when I'm stressed especially. It is how I grow up and honestly...I don't know if I'll ever break this habit this side of heaven. I HATE it. I want to change. I'm better, but when I feel anger and frustration it's like these emotions are tied to a curse word adn they fly. Having children has helped and is sobering because I don't want them to grow up hearing and learning these from me. But still, I do it. Thank God for his grace and long suffering and love.

 

That's where I'm coming from anyways. All valid points though.

I doubt you are telling the vulgar stories that he was always making up.He didn't stop at just using curse words thrown in with regular conversation. I don't think you understand the degree of vulgarity that this person used.I really cannot communicate the degree of vulgarity that this person used. Even after just hearing him speak I could not repeat a lot of the things he said because so much of it was so bizarre and strange and didn't even make sense. Believe me, no one was surprised when he was accused of sexual abuse or that he didn't care that he had killed two teenagers. In his case, the degree of profanity and vulgarity was a reflection of the way he treated people and how he didn't care. He was diagnosed as a psychopath and he certainly demonstrated that he truly was a psychopath. There was no shortage of people prepared to be character witnesses against him when the DA came calling.

I think that most people cannot say that they have never used a curse word, and once someone gets into the habit of cursing it can be very difficult to stop, but most people do not come anywhere close to being as vulgar and profane as that man was.

Edited September 19, 2010 by Miss Sherry

[Rosie_0801]

I think I swear too much, and dh thinks I hardly swear at all, so I'm not sure what sort of people he's spent life hanging around with. Most of the words I object to and don't use myself are turning body parts and certain acts into profanities and that makes me feel bad. There oughtn't be anything bad about those body parts or acts. Nothing that I do, or that is attached to me deserves to be labeled and spoken about with such degradation.

 

But I really do think that "ouch" just isn't strong enough for some situations, and some people are nastier than "meanie," so those words form a useful part of my vocabulary, even though I don't want to hear my kids saying them, :)

 

Rosie

[Jean in Newcastle]

I differentiate between profanity and vulgarity. Profanity tends to bother me, but vulgarity doesn't bother me as often.

 

Profanity would be taking religious words and sentiments and using them flippantly. In many cases, it's hearing the name of someone I love being used as an equivalent of "oh sh**", and I don't think anyone would like hearing the name of a loved one used that way.

 

Vulgarity is, I think, often inappropriate, because who wants to be reminded publicly of excrement and/or sex at, say, the dinner table? But sometimes it's appropriate - if you just had something very painful happen (drop a heavy box on your toe, say), well, the previously mentioned "oh, sh**" seems about right. Stubbing your toe makes you about as happy as dog poop makes you, so why not say so? :)

 

I do like people saying what they mean though, so I wish more people would use vulgarity only thoughtfully, only when they really mean it. If you use it all the time, it stops meaning anything at all.

 

Hear! Hear! Well said.

[LaissezFaire]

I am not bothered by purposeful cursing. In other words sometimes an emotion is so intense or a situation is so bad that a curse word is about all that will do. But I really despise casual cursing when the curse word is every other word. It's so annoying.

[Miss Sherry]

none of it really bothers me... they're just words. a bunch of letters shoved together, y'know?

Are you serious, you really do not think that the heart, mind, and soul of human beings can be expressed in words ? Words can bring great healing or great pain to people. Words can change the course of nations and the world.

Perhaps you really are kidding ? ! ? !

[Melissa in Australia]

Swearing bothers me. I don't swear, and I find people respect that and try not to swear in front of me.

I have asked people to stop swearing so much. and also asked someone ( a close acquaintance, who I knew would not take it personally) if she was afraid of lightning with all her blasphemy. She thought it was hilarious, and has since refrained from blaspheming so much.

 

The reason I don't like swearing?

I think it shows a lack of self control.

[Miss Sherry]

Swearing bothers me. I don't swear, and I find people respect that and try not to swear in front of me.

I have asked people to stop swearing so much. and also asked someone ( a close acquaintance, who I knew would not take it personally) if she was afraid of lightning with all her blasphemy. She thought it was hilarious, and has since refrained from blaspheming so much.

 

The reason I don't like swearing?

I think it shows a lack of self control.

I agree. I also think it shows a lack of self control. I think that there are people who sincerely want to stop using curse words but have a difficult struggle with it. I've heard a few people say they were working on trying to stop cursing. I think using a lot of curse words and vulgarity is a sign of moral weakness. It takes some determination and strength to stop doing it.

But none of us is perfect and I would be surprised if anyone could get on here and say they have never once used a curse word.

[Snowfall]

Are you serious, you really do not think that the heart, mind, and soul of human beings can be expressed in words ? Words can bring great healing or great pain to people. Words can change the course of nations and the world.

Perhaps you really are kidding ? ! ? !

 

I can't speak for the poster you've quoted, but for myself, I can say what she said in all seriousness. She didn't say that words aren't expressive. She said that curse words are just a bunch of letters, like any other word. Calling someone names is one thing. Yelling out the "D*mn it!" when you stub your toe is another. When I stub my toe my heart, mind, and whatever soul there may be are thinking, "D*mn it!" whether that fits in with your personal religious beliefs or not. And I'm not kidding. ;)

[Miss Sherry]

I can't speak for the poster you've quoted, but for myself, I can say what she said in all seriousness. She didn't say that words aren't expressive. She said that curse words are just a bunch of letters, like any other word. Calling someone names is one thing. Yelling out the "D*mn it!" when you stub your toe is another. When I stub my toe my heart, mind, and whatever soul there may be are thinking, "D*mn it!" whether that fits in with your personal religious beliefs or not. And I'm not kidding. ;)

Your post is a little unclear to me. You said " I can't speak for the poster you've quoted" and then you go on to speak for her by saying "She didn't say that words aren't expressive. She said that curse words are just a bunch of letters, like any other word. " LOL

What she said was "none of it really bothers me... they're just words. a bunch of letters shoved together, y'know?"

 

_____________________________________________________________

I'm also unclear about this part of your post.

"When I stub my toe my heart, mind, and whatever soul there may be are thinking "D*mn it!" whether that fits in with your personal religious beliefs or not. And I'm not kidding. "

 

What are you not kidding about - that you disregard religious beliefs - that you need to express your tendency to say **** it - or what ?

Am I supposed to be shocked that you say **** it? Because believe me I am not. Like I said, I doubt there is anyone that can truthfully say they have never used a curse word.

 

There are of course, huge differences in the degree of cursing and vulgarity that people use. A **** it when you stub your toe is not a big deal in my mind.It's not a good thing but it's not horrible.Maybe you thought I would say it was horrible so you brought it up to shock me?LOL On the other end of the spectrum , which I do think is a huge deal, are people like the man I described above who use disgusting vulgarity and have such warped minds that not only are their words horrendously offensive but so are their actions. In that case , that person was a sexual abuser who had been diagnosed as a psychopath. His words were a reflection of his warped mind and so I found his speech to be very offensive and if I ever hear another person speaking as he did I will be very leary of that person.

Edited September 19, 2010 by Miss Sherry

[Mrs Mungo]

I am sorry, but all I can think of *now* is "you're so vain, you probably think this song is about you."

[Carrie12345]

I'm a fan of cursing in the "right" context. To me, it's like the difference between calling a sunset purdy and calling it magnificent. There are times I complain, and then there are times I b*!@h. There are crummy days and there are s#i!!y days. Sometimes I'm confused, and sometimes I don't know what the bleep is going on!

[Pamela H in Texas]

The word "you" in the following is not towards any particular person!

 

To me, it comes down to respecting the company you're in, esp in public. Unless something is a command from God, you should not do it if it steps on people's toes. My rights only go as far as to the next person's and yours only goes as far as the people who are in ear/eye shot of you.

 

I have a few reasons I feel it's not appropriate, but I'm not perfect either nor claim to be. However, I'm pretty protective of my kids (esp when they were younger as they are old enough to sigh and look away now). I don't want them hearing you saying curse words or substitutes. I don't want them to see you hitting or verbally berating your kid. Whatever. I think you have the "right" to do those things. I just don't think you have the right to subject US to those things.

 

In return, I will not subject you to anything offensive unless you consider something I consider Biblical to be offensive (for example, I'm not saluting the flag which I can understand may be offensive to you; but I'm much more concerned about offending God than you). But I will discipline my kids privately. I will use speech any preschooler can use. I will chew with my mouth shut :)

[....]

I was in the army for 7 years. Nothing bothers me. I have seen and heard everything at this point.

[Pam Wilhelm]

I was in the army for 7 years. Nothing bothers me. I have seen and heard everything at this point.

 

 

Same here....... I was Navy. Nothing bothers me.

 

I have told the kids that cursing is a less than honorable way to communicate....that given a few seconds of thought, we could certainly come up with a better way to express ourselves. However, there are times when little else will do.... but overall, cursing is done as a means of hurting someone else's feelings.... impressing a crowd.... or just thoughtless speech. It is better if we don't....but not the end of the world if we do.

[Caroline]

I'm a fan of cursing in the "right" context. To me, it's like the difference between calling a sunset purdy and calling it magnificent. There are times I complain, and then there are times I b*!@h. There are crummy days and there are s#i!!y days. Sometimes I'm confused, and sometimes I don't know what the bleep is going on!

 

:iagree:

 

And the post about the Saxons and the Normans was fascinating. Thanks! My son is doing Brit Lit this year, and part of the class is studying the history or Britain. We are immersed in the Saxons right now.

[Rebecca VA]

Vulgarity shocks me because it exposes the ugly side of a person. I don't *want* to hear unpleasant words any more than I want to see someone with sloppy, falling-down pants and too much cleavage. I want people to show me the better side of themselves. It doesn't take much to bite one's tongue and use a euphemism, or to say something pleasant instead of mouthing off.

 

We all have bad days and bad situations, but we can choose to lift ourselves above the mess. We don't have to wallow in vulgarity. The Apostle Paul suffered a great deal, but he chose to rejoice in his sufferings and bless others.

[ma23peas]

A fool and his money are soon parted, likewise a fool and his words are soon parted....

 

I have never heard a curse word that is honorable, respectful, or necessary....some of the greatest expressions of anger are more clearly stated by body language, silence than any tirade of expletives. If words were just words then why do we have R ratings for language? We censor based on respect and decency....I'm all about setting the standard higher than cowtowing to the lowest common denominator...why does anything offend anyone? Where will our tolerance take us to next?

 

Tara

[MorganClassicalPrep]

When I stub my toe my heart, mind, and whatever soul there may be are thinking, "D*mn it!" whether that fits in with your personal religious beliefs or not. And I'm not kidding. ;)

 

:lol:

 

I see someone already posted about the Saxons and the Normans. I actually had a college professor who would use certain words because, as she informed us, they designation of them as a curse word was just a method to put down certain groups of people. She was awesome. I don't think anyone who was in that class will forget how some words became "profanity"

 

Personally, I try not to curse, but mostly because I don't want my daughter to pick it up. I do think there are other ways of expressing ourselves in most situations, and I don't think it's appropriate for children. It doesn't bother me when other people do it, as long as there aren't children around.

[cathmom]

Profanity bothers me because it's vulgar. But it's not just profanity - other things that other people consider perfectly acceptable, I consider vulgar. For example, I don't allow my children to say "butt" - we say "bottom" here.

 

As for who decided that it was vulgar? I think it was me. :D

[3littlekeets]

Okay, I know this is my third post but, I'm an English major and love this stuff.

 

fwiw, a lot of our vulgarities, in English, come from the Saxons, whereas a lot of our "nice" words come from the Normans. After William the Conquerer came through, the Saxons became the lower class, and their words also became "lower class". So you have the more refined "intestines" and the earthier "guts" (to pick a non-censored example).

 

That's not all of it, but it's part of it.

 

 

Very interesting! Thank you :-). That is fascinating...

 

:lol:

 

I see someone already posted about the Saxons and the Normans. I actually had a college professor who would use certain words because, as she informed us, they designation of them as a curse word was just a method to put down certain groups of people. She was awesome. I don't think anyone who was in that class will forget how some words became "profanity"

 

Personally, I try not to curse, but mostly because I don't want my daughter to pick it up. I do think there are other ways of expressing ourselves in most situations, and I don't think it's appropriate for children. It doesn't bother me when other people do it, as long as there aren't children around.

 

 

Wowsa...hegemony at it most evil...just using someone's language choices to marginalize them. I need to do some more research on that (note to self!).

 

 

I differentiate between profanity and vulgarity. Profanity tends to bother me, but vulgarity doesn't bother me as often.

 

Profanity would be taking religious words and sentiments and using them flippantly. In many cases, it's hearing the name of someone I love being used as an equivalent of "oh sh**", and I don't think anyone would like hearing the name of a loved one used that way.

 

 

 

Vulgarity is, I think, often inappropriate, because who wants to be reminded publicly of excrement and/or sex at, say, the dinner table? But sometimes it's appropriate - if you just had something very painful happen (drop a heavy box on your toe, say), well, the previously mentioned "oh, sh**" seems about right. Stubbing your toe makes you about as happy as dog poop makes you, so why not say so? :)

 

I do like people saying what they mean though, so I wish more people would use vulgarity only thoughtfully, only when they really mean it. If you use it all the time, it stops meaning anything at all.

 

I like the explanation that you are giving here...it makes sense to me :001_smile:

Edited September 19, 2010 by 3littlekeets

[freethinkermama]

Why do you think that some words get censored by social convention and cause upset, when others don't (e.g. "Sh!+" bothers but "poop" doesn't?) The referent is the same thing, but we decide one is vulgar and the other is not. I hear "educated people can avoid them," but WHY should they? Who decided that certain words were taboo, and why do we actually get so upset by them?

 

I'm not talking about words used to insult, such as calling someone a B!+C*, but using the words in animated discourse.

 

Would love to hear your thoughts....

 

My father uses profanity quite liberally, in situations where it makes no sense at all, AFAIC :) But, I know it's a habit with him so. . . .

 

I don't mind hearing it if I understand it has a meaning and use. If I slam my finger in the door, I might say something vulgar (ok, I almost certainly will), but folks must have a way to express feelings, and not all feelings are pleasant. I rarely use vulgarity or profanity of any sort, but when I feel it's appropriate I will.

 

OTOH, I know families who disallow any sort of exclamation "drat" "darn" "rats" "blast" because they're all just "cover-ups" for "bad words". To them, saying these euphemisms is just as bad as saying an actual "bad word." Frankly, I worry for these people. There is no way to verbally express displeasure, shock, frustration, etc. That's not healthy.

 

T.

[TXMomof4]

A year ago cursing would have really bothered me. All of my friends and people I was with on a regular basis were church friends and it just wasn't part of their regular vocabulary.

 

Since dh joined the army full time I have been exposed to more cursing than I would have thought possible. It's kind of funny though - hearing it from the men doesn't really shock me or bother me too much unless it's the f-bomb every other word. Women cursing still makes me flinch though. I don't know why, but even a female soldier cursing makes my skin crawl. Analyze that!

[Tammy]

I agree!

 

.

[Jenny in Atl]

Not bothered by it, but over use shows a lack of creativity of one's vocabulary.

[nmoira]

Not bothered by it, but over use shows a lack of creativity of one's vocabulary.

This.

 

Profanity is not a necessary component of demeaning or hateful speech. Truly horrific things can be said with smiles and sweet language.

[Gwenhwyfar]

none of it really bothers me... they're just words. a bunch of letters shoved together, y'know?

 

Are you serious, you really do not think that the heart, mind, and soul of human beings can be expressed in words ? Words can bring great healing or great pain to people. Words can change the course of nations and the world.

Perhaps you really are kidding ? ! ? !

 

yeah i just totally made that up to annoy you ! ! ! :w00t:

 

 

the question was "If profanity bothers you, why does it? If not, why not?" ...and i answered it.

[nmoira]

Profanity bothers me because it's vulgar. But it's not just profanity - other things that other people consider perfectly acceptable, I consider vulgar. For example, I don't allow my children to say "butt" - we say "bottom" here.

Well, I revel in our vulgarity... especially when it's creative. But there's a time and a place to set it aside.

 

Our favourite family epithet is Pynchon! One day we were making a list of things daddy couldn't say while navigating out of the TJ's parking lot (always something of a death-defying act). DD the Elder let loose with a couple of the usual suspects, and my little chimed in with, "Pynchon" because of Daddy's frustration at getting bogged down in Against the Day while I was whipping through Kristin Lavransdatter (it was something of a family joke at the time, and DH had been playing it up). Well, Pynchon! stuck, though we have several epithets that would meet with something less than approval from some here.

[Jenny in Atl]

This.

 

Profanity is not a necessary component of demeaning or hateful speech. Truly horrific things can be said with smiles and sweet language.

 

Very true indeed!

[cin]

I don't like profanity and vulgarity, and to an extent, it's probably cultural or learned. But I agree that it shows a total lack of creativity, and a total misuse of words.

 

The *F* word is my favorite. I mean, taking it at it's true definition, soemthing to do with making Tea. Can books be *F*in? Can a table?

 

Now though, it has become a noun, verb and adjective and adverb. One can make a whole sentence around the word. *F* the *F*ing *F*ers. Creativity at it's best.

[Miss Sherry]

Okay, I know this is my third post but, I'm an English major and love this stuff.

 

fwiw, a lot of our vulgarities, in English, come from the Saxons, whereas a lot of our "nice" words come from the Normans. After William the Conquerer came through, the Saxons became the lower class, and their words also became "lower class". So you have the more refined "intestines" and the earthier "guts" (to pick a non-censored example).

 

That's not all of it, but it's part of it.

Thanks for posting this. I've never heard this before and it's very interesting. It does explain some things.