What is your definition of living "comfortable"?

[rafiki]

.

[OnTheBrink]

For me, it's being able to choose frugality instead of being forced into it, if that makes sense. It's being able to pay the bills without having to skimp on something else, it's being able to feed the family well, participate in recreation that we enjoy and still be able to give a little.

[PariSarah]

Having choices.

 

I think that sums it up nicely.

 

If I were to add anything, it would also be: Not living in fear. Fear of the future, fear of the neighbors, fear of a disaster. Yes, I'm aware that something in the "act of God" category could happen--some wild rare disease, a Katrina-like natural disaster, a comet crashing into the moon. Fine. I'm not safe from everything. But that's not really a day-to-day worry of mine, and in general, I don't have to deal with daily, real fear. I feel like whatever disasters may befall me will probably be ones that I can survive.

[Jennifer in NH]

 

For us living comfortable is: not having to worry about being able to pay that months bills, not having to plan ahead for little things like sneakers, not carrying debt on our shoulders (other then the house), knowing we are doing our best to save for retirement, having an emergency fund to fall back on when the car breaks down.

 

Other then that I love our simple life of very little tv, lots of books, playing in the back yard, going for walks, exploring area parks and trails.

 

That just about sums it up!:001_smile:

[Amy in NH]

We have expenses that are just about exactly what you listed, same old cars, same costs, for a family of 6. We have no cable/satellite TV, no cell phones, no credit cards. Living comfortably would mean exactly what you said, and we just don't. I am always juggling the bills, sometimes I lay awake nights thinking about how I can make it work "this month". We can't afford to put away 15% into the 401K, although we do put in something because it really doesn't make a difference in our bottom line take home income. I have to schedule haircuts and winter boots for when the next student loan check is coming - and in a couple of years it won't be coming and we'll have to start repaying (so that will be my "credit card"). Yikes!

 

I also love our simple life. I just wish it were a tiny bit easier to afford.

[Quiver0f10]

For me, it's being able to choose frugality instead of being forced into it, if that makes sense. It's being able to pay the bills without having to skimp on something else, it's being able to feed the family well, participate in recreation that we enjoy and still be able to give a little.

 

 

What she said! :iagree:

[Emmy]

Thanks Sarah!

 

Here's what I posted in the other thread:

 

To me comfortable is about being able to make choices. Comfortable does not equal buying anything you could want, spending $200 a weekend on fluff trips to Target and Lowes and eating out 4 times a week. Comfortable is having enough to pay the bills and then some extra that you can choose - do I want to eat out or would I rather use that money to buy a couple books? Do I want to sign suzie q up for dance class or would we rather take an overnight trip as a family with that money? Etc. Having choices = comfortable to me.

 

As to what that number is....well I think it varies highly depending on where you live and what kind of house you feel is necessary.

[*anj*]

My answer is similar to others.

To my mind, "comfortable" means:

 

• the ability to pay monthly bills
  
• the ability to save money for emergencies (loss of job, health crisis, etc.) and for children's education
  
• being able to help others in their time of need
  
• putting money aside for retirement, making the most of any matching funds offered from employers
  
• being able to save money for a few nice things such as vacations, occasional nice dinners out, etc.
  
• as others have said, being able to choose frugality rather than having it thrust upon them

I think that you get "comfortable" by learning to live within a budget. I do realize that there are some people who simply do not earn enough money. If that's your situation, then the first step to becoming "comfortable" would be to find a way to increase your take home pay. But I think that there are a lot of people who do make enough to reach these comfort goals, if only they learned to manage their money better. I know from whence I speak on this account.

[Antonia]

The thread below really surprised me. Our basic bills for our family of 5, including mortgage in an area that has a 3.7% tax rate, gas for an 11 year old SUV & 6 y/o mini van, and groceries come out to $3,000 a month. We have lived in 3 states and always been around that number for set bills and that is the high end figuring gas/electric running $325 per month. That is 36,000 a year after taxes.

 

We contribute 15% into IRA's/401K's that is not included in that number.

 

For us living comfortable is: not having to worry about being able to pay that months bills, not having to plan ahead for little things like sneakers, not carrying debt on our shoulders (other then the house), knowing we are doing our best to save for retirement, having an emergency fund to fall back on when the car breaks down - ironically it's in the garage today and I'm not stressed.

 

Other then that I love our simple life of very little tv, lots of books, playing in the back yard, going for walks, exploring area parks and trails.

 

Hope this doesn't sound snarky, but I live on about twice what you do to maintain about the same lifestyle. That's how much we *need* here in CT for an average house, one car (dh has a company car), food, heating, insurance, savings, etc. The $3000/month you live on is only slightly more than my mortgage payment. Again, hope this doesn't sound snarky. I am just trying to illustrate that where one lives is the real determining factor.

[LizzyBee]

For me, comfortable means:

 

Having a home that is heated and cooled

Having decent clothes to wear

Having two cars (public transportation is not available where we live)

Having 2 square meals per day (I am not a breakfast person)

Not having to worry about how to pay for the above

 

We live in an affluent area where many people scorn our lifestyle, size of our home, etc. But I think we're living better than just comfortably because:

 

We can afford (although it's a stretch) horseback riding lessons for our teen

I have a van on which the trunk and passenger side door open with the touch of a button

When we need (or think we need) something at the grocery store, we can go get it

For the most part I can buy the curriculum I think is best for our children

 

I could list more but I'll stop there.

[Jenny in Florida]

. . .I think it's being able to cover the basics and to choose a few luxuries without going into debt.

 

So, I like it when we can:

 

• pay the rent on our modest home,
  
• buy a reasonable amount of groceries each week (even if it's mostly generics and things that are on sale),
  
• clothe my family respectably,
  
• pay the medical bills for ourselves and our pets,
  
• make the payment on the economy car we bought used four years ago,
  
• do basic maintenance on both cars (the other is older and paid for),
  
• put gas in the car to get us where we need to go,
  
• pay for our entertainment (cable, internet) without giving up necessities,
  
• get our kids access to appropriate educational and enrichment activities,
  
• buy books,
  
• support charities and cultural institutions we value,
  
• still have enough financial breathing room to do some fun things, too.

Please understand right up front that I am aware there are lots of people who consider themselves "comfortable" without some of these things. And, personally, there are a few I could live without or cut back on, if the rest of my family (and specifically my husband) would cooperate. But, given my family and my personal situation, that's "comfort" for me.

 

Notice the things that aren't on this list. No vacations. Not a lot of restaurant meals. No fancy clothing. No manicures or salon trips. We don't own a home or drive a vehicle as nice or as large as most of our friends. My children don't attend private schools. I can't remember the last time I had brunch with a friend. The only video gaming system we own is the one my husband bought for himself with bonus money about 5 years ago, and I can't remember the last time he bought or even rented a new game for it. We don't have credit cards. Our only debt is the last year or so of our one car payment and the PLUS loan we took this year to cover our daughter's college tuition.

 

So, sure, we're not talking subsistence, but we're not living high on the hog, here, either. And, although my husband makes what objectively looks like a very nice salary, the truth is that, after covering the items listed above and our daughter's tuition payments and living expenses, there's not much left over.

 

Last month, my car needed $800 worth of repairs, and it meant we had to do a lot of scrimping elsewhere.

 

I'm not complaining. I've lived through much, much leaner times in my life, and I am absolutely aware of exactly how lucky we are. But we're just about comfortable.

[Tutor]

My answer is similar to others.

To my mind, "comfortable" means:

• the ability to pay monthly bills

• the ability to save money for emergencies (loss of job, health crisis, etc.) and for children's education

• being able to help others in their time of need

• putting money aside for retirement, making the most of any matching funds offered from employers

• being able to save money for a few nice things such as vacations, occasional nice dinners out, etc.

• as others have said, being able to choose frugality rather than having it thrust upon them

I think that you get "comfortable" by learning to live within a budget. I do realize that there are some people who simply do not earn enough money. If that's your situation, then the first step to becoming "comfortable" would be to find a way to increase your take home pay. But I think that there are a lot of people who do make enough to reach these comfort goals, if only they learned to manage their money better. I know from whence I speak on this account.

 

I would generally agree with this. I would define "having enough for medical emergencies" as having a major medical plan with enough in savings to meet the deductible and pay for any normal, annual visits.

 

I definitely agree to having enough to help others, but I wouldn't want so much that it wasn't a sacrifice to give it. I think the sacrifice is often a necessary part of the gift.

 

We are currently making about $10-15,000 less per year now than when we lived up north, but our standard of living is only slightly less than it was when we made more, and that's because we had health insurance with our last job and do not here. Scarily, we live on a PhD stipend and random, part-time income gleaned from many different places and we are making slightly more than the average per capita income for our state ETA: this hovers around the national poverty line). Seeing the poverty here has made us very sad yet appreciative of what we do have. Despite the poverty, though, we are surrounded by some of the most generous people we have ever met. It is amazing.

[PariSarah]

Again, hope this doesn't sound snarky. I am just trying to illustrate that where one lives is the real determining factor.

 

As I said in another thread, what is "average" in some towns is artificially inflated by exporting the poor to other towns. If I were to tell you what income level I would need to live in an "average" house in Beverly Hills, you would likely (and rightly) tell me that I had stretched the meaning of needs and averages to their breaking point.

 

I do understand that *basic safety* costs more in some areas than in others, and that my house transplanted into your town would be far more expensive than it is here. But that means that me and my neighbors wouldn't be living there anymore. They'd live two or three towns away, and take the bus in. In other words, it really does take more money to live "comfortably" in your area, but living in your area is already a choice to live at a certain level, KWIM?

 

I appreciate how you've been adding perspective to these threads--I hope you don't take my comments as a criticism.

[Jenny in Atl]

Being able to pay for food, medical needs, basic stuff with cash. And yes, choice, to take a small vacation, to not fear the car dying or getting sick. Just small stuff.

[KidsHappen]

Our fixed expenses are:

 

Mortgage (on the cheaper end of the scale where I live)

 

Student Loans (we had a 30 yr loan and my dh wouldn't be able to make as much as he does without his degree)

 

Car Payment (one car bought used, we could get a cheaper car but with dh gone all the time, I really need something dependable)

 

Family support (not legally required but we feel morally required)

 

Electric

 

Cell phones (not technically required but I feel safer with them)

 

Internet

 

Gas (home heating)

 

Geico (car insurance)

 

Water

 

Phone

 

Citi Bank (to pay for mom's funeral)

 

Medical care not covered by insurance

 

Life insurance

 

Home Owner's Dues

 

 

 

This is all from net pay. This leaves us $2000 a month to cover:

 

Groceries

 

Household supplies (cleaning supplies, shampoo, cat food, etc)

 

Gasoline

 

Dry Cleaning

 

 

This pretty much takes up all of the expendable money. I know that some people would consider that a lot of money to cover those items but it doesn't seem like it to me. We spend about $300 on household items, about the same on gasoline, about $100 on dry cleaning so that leaves $1300 for groceries. I have to fight to keep it under that. I feed six people lots of fruits and vegtables, organic dairy, (not cheap) and I don't bake my own breads. My family is vegetarians so they need to fill up on other stuff. I probably spend more on food than I could but to tell you the truth I just don't have the time and energy to work more at it. This does not leave any money for:

 

Clothing

 

Books

 

Curriculum

 

Dining Out

 

Holiday

 

Movies

 

Hair Cuts

 

Vacations (we have never taken a vacation)

 

Children's activities

 

Emergencies

 

 

When and if we get these things, they come out of bonus money we get once a year.

 

 

Now I am not complaining. I think that we live very comfortably but certainly not luxuriously. And the only possible way that we could live on less would be to sell car (then we would be upside down) and get cheaper car, sell house (in today's market?) and move to cheaper place (how would we get the money to move), pay off loan for mom's funeral (which we plan to do as soon as possible) and pay off student loans (we are working on it). I could give up cell (my dh couldn't because of work) and internet but I consider those my luxuries.

 

 

I know other people do it on less but I really don't know how. I know that we used to do it on less but once again, I don't know how. Housing expense was a huge part of it and I fed many fewer people. We weren't paying student loans or family support yet and didn't have the loan. We also probably spent less on utilities, gasoline and household expenses.

[melissel]

That just about sums it up!:001_smile:

 

ITA, Michele, your definition about sums it up for me too. We have older cars, don't buy electronics or big toys or books (outside of quality used ones for the kids), don't go out for expensive meals etc. I would consider comfortable to be--all the basics covered, and then a little extra for emergencies or sneakers or the occasional birthday surprise or small luxuries (like my Clinique facial scrub, which I might be starting to consider a necessity, actually--stupid pimples!).

[Colleen]

As I said in another thread, what is "average" in some towns is artificially inflated by exporting the poor to other towns.

 

That's the sticky wicket. The people who are more well-to-do tend to congregate in one area and that in and of itself artificially increases the "norm"...

[Colleen]

Comfortable, to me, is being able to meet my here-and-now basic needs, and have some say in how those needs are met. I'm talking about housing, food, clothing. Being able to pay the bills. Having little-to-no-debt (other than a home mortgage; I do consider that exceptional compared to, say, going into debt to buy groceries). If I'm sitting at home, using a computer to interact with the rest of the world, that's beyond comfortable. If I have an array of choices at my disposal, that's beyond comfortable, imo. If I've got money to spend to entertain myself, that's beyond comfortable. If I can save for the future, that's beyond comfortable. So in light of that, I am beyond comfortable.

[melissel]

Comfortable, to me, is being able to meet my here-and-now basic needs, and have some say in how those needs are met. I'm talking about housing, food, clothing. Being able to pay the bills. Having little-to-no-debt (other than a home mortgage; I do consider that exceptional compared to, say, going into debt to buy groceries). If I'm sitting at home, using a computer to interact with the rest of the world, that's beyond comfortable. If I have an array of choices at my disposal, that's beyond comfortable, imo. If I've got money to spend to entertain myself, that's beyond comfortable. If I can save for the future, that's beyond comfortable. So in light of that, I am beyond comfortable.

 

See, to me, what you're describing is the difference between financially secure and financially comfortable. IMO, there's a margin between the two where my broadband and cable, organic groceries, and occasional pizza deliveries fall. I could indeed survive without those things, but I wouldn't be particularly happy, and I'd feel deprived, which would mean that I wasn't comfortable.

[Plaid Dad]

We are on the bottom rung of the income poll. For us, comfortable would mean having enough to get off various types of government assistance, pay for food and health insurance, have savings in the bank, and ideally, be debt-free. It would not necessarily include things like a second car, yearly vacations, or owning a home.

[Tracey in TX]

This is a really good back-up thread to determine 'comfort' definition.

 

For our family to live comfortably we prefer (but not require):

*savings (retirement, college, 6 months living expenses, etc)

*pay monthly bills (mortgage, food, health, etc)

*sports/activities per child (gymnastics,golf, and select soccer are expensive)

*slush fund (not savings)

 

We choose to drive used cars, have old (sometimes dilapidated) furniture, and not the coolest clothes. It's preference. Rather put money in savings or travel. We've lived frugally before, and would prefer to make sacrifices to not do so again. (ie DH is gone very often) It's more of a lifestyle choice.

 

Good question.

[tmkclscroggins]

For me, comfortable is liike what many others responded:

 

having enough to cover the bills, having health and life insurance, and some savings. My husband makes what would appear to be a nice salary but we don't have much extra. We don't carry credit card debt . We don't have much debt other than the mortgage and my car. My husband drives an 8 year old truck that is paid for and he will continue to drive it until it dies. We do spend a lot on our kids and their activities but not nearly what a lot of people we know do. We don't do vacations or much entertainment. We don't go out to restaurants much anymore. We may see an occasional movie - but usually wait until it is at the $1.00 movies.

 

Being comfortable means different things to different people. We've been at both ends of the spectrum. The worries when we had absolutely no money were always there.

 

I think there are struggles and worries, no matter where you are. There are just too many unknowns in the world. I do know that for us, the gas prices have cut into our budget drastically. The cost of groceries and other items is ridiculous.

 

This was a hard question to answer!

 

Melissa

[Cheryl in NM]

The thread below really surprised me. Our basic bills for our family of 5, including mortgage in an area that has a 3.7% tax rate, gas for an 11 year old SUV & 6 y/o mini van, and groceries come out to $3,000 a month. We have lived in 3 states and always been around that number for set bills and that is the high end figuring gas/electric running $325 per month. That is 36,000 a year after taxes.

 

We contribute 15% into IRA's/401K's that is not included in that number.

 

For us living comfortable is: not having to worry about being able to pay that months bills, not having to plan ahead for little things like sneakers, not carrying debt on our shoulders (other then the house), knowing we are doing our best to save for retirement, having an emergency fund to fall back on when the car breaks down - ironically it's in the garage today and I'm not stressed.

 

Other then that I love our simple life of very little tv, lots of books, playing in the back yard, going for walks, exploring area parks and trails.

 

This is EXACTLY what our family considers "comfortable" also. We just don't want to have to stress about money, but we don't need to be swimming in it either. We just want to live a simple life.:)

[Colleen]

IMO, there's a margin between the two where my broadband and cable, organic groceries, and occasional pizza deliveries fall. I could indeed survive without those things, but I wouldn't be particularly happy, and I'd feel deprived, which would mean that I wasn't comfortable.

 

Whereas I consider the things you listed luxuries. I just can not put deprivation on par with lack of cable, etc.

[melissel]

 

Whereas I consider the things you listed luxuries. I just can not put deprivation on par with lack of cable, etc.

 

Oh, I definitely agree that they're luxuries. So is air conditioning. But I would not be a very happy camper without it (and no one would want to live in a house with me and no air conditioning), which is where the comfort part comes in, in my mind.

[rafiki]

.

[Colleen]

Oh, I definitely agree that they're luxuries. So is air conditioning. But I would not be a very happy camper without it (and no one would want to live in a house with me and no air conditioning), which is where the comfort part comes in, in my mind.

 

Air conditioning, in some areas and for some people, is fairly essential. It would indeed be a deprivation for some folks to live in some environments without a means of cooling the air around them. So I can understand that. But I can't connect with feeling deprived because I can't have pizza delivery. That's different altogether. Imo, of course.

[Wendi]

I'd define comfortable as:

 

being able to buy the basics (mortgage and utilities, food and gas, basic clothes and household needs) without wondering where the $$ will come from

 

living in a neighborhood that feels safe

 

being able to build up savings to absorb unexpected medical bills, car repairs, loss of employment, etc.

 

being able to afford some entertainment and luxuries, although not extravagant (a restaurant meal once a month, an inexpensive vacation every few years)

 

saving for retirement, kids' college

 

Wendi

[Scarlett]

 

Air conditioning, in some areas and for some people, is fairly essential. It would indeed be a deprivation for some folks to live in some environments without a means of cooling the air around them. So I can understand that. But I can't connect with feeling deprived because I can't have pizza delivery. That's different altogether. Imo, of course.

 

 

 

Yes I'd much rather live w/o cable and pizza delivery than AC. It gets up to 100 many times where I live. And it is humid and gross. Even 90 is terrible. However, we never had it growing up and we survived. Things were different though. We slept with our windows open and a fan on us. On the hottest summer days we never dreamed of using the oven. We made sandwiches and went to the river until it cooled off at sundown.

 

So a lot of this 'comfort' is just what we get used to having. I could easily do without many many things I have if my life were set up just a bit different.

[Antonia]

As I said in another thread, what is "average" in some towns is artificially inflated by exporting the poor to other towns. If I were to tell you what income level I would need to live in an "average" house in Beverly Hills, you would likely (and rightly) tell me that I had stretched the meaning of needs and averages to their breaking point.

 

I do understand that *basic safety* costs more in some areas than in others, and that my house transplanted into your town would be far more expensive than it is here. But that means that me and my neighbors wouldn't be living there anymore. They'd live two or three towns away, and take the bus in. In other words, it really does take more money to live "comfortably" in your area, but living in your area is already a choice to live at a certain level, KWIM?

 

I appreciate how you've been adding perspective to these threads--I hope you don't take my comments as a criticism.

 

 

No criticism taken! I understand what you are saying.

 

Just to clarify, though, the town in which we live is not considered to be one of the most "desirable" in CT. We purposely chose a small, farm-town because we liked the atmosphere and the fact that not everyone here lives in mansions and drives a hummer! Still, the prices are high by sheer virtue of the fact that it is CT, and we really don't have much choice about where we live. Dh's sales territory is NYC, and we are about as close as we can afford to be and about as far away as is feasible for him to drive.

[Susan in TX]

Comfortable to me is having enough money to pay the bills and meet basic needs. Not having to worry about how you are going to go to your cousin's wedding when you don't have money to buy a dress, and you don't have a dress hanging in your closet. It's not having to worry about how you are going to afford new shoes for your kids, especially the one with wide feet whose shoes cost $50, because you can't find a pair that fits at Wal-mart. It is having enough money to fix the car when it breaks down and not having to use one credit card to pay the monthly payment on another. That's comfortable.

 

Susan in TX

[Antonia]

Personally I have lived in the south, in the north, in between, in the country, and near a major city. You can typically shop around the area for houses and find communities that do not cost as much as the city. We have also passed on opportunities where the salary wasn't what we felt we needed to for us to be "comfortable" in that area or at least not enough to justify moving. We are not attached to a house or area. Home is what and where you make it.

 

Savings is not included in our set bill total, that is simply basics, mortgage, taxes, water, gas, food, etc.. not clothing, kids activities, special occasions, etc..

 

I agree with you to a certain extent, but not completely. As I wrote to Parisarah in another post, if your job is extremely specialized as is my dh's, there are only so many markets. We *must* live where we do because it is near my dh's sales territory, NYC. Any closer and it's more expensive; any further away, too far for him to drive.

[Jenny in Florida]

If I were to tell you what income level I would need to live in an "average" house in Beverly Hills, you would likely (and rightly) tell me that I had stretched the meaning of needs and averages to their breaking point. . . . In other words, it really does take more money to live "comfortably" in your area, but living in your area is already a choice to live at a certain level, KWIM?

 

Well, there's choice and then there's choice.

 

For example, my family does live in an area that is more expensive than some within "commuting distance" of my husband's job. There are lots of places that would put us closer that would be even pricier. For example, we are friendly with a family in which the dad works in the same general area as my husband. At the time they moved into their current home, they had their child in the public schools and it was, therefore, very important to them to make sure they moved into a neighborhood that was zoned for the specific school they wanted him to attend. They live less than a mile from us in a neighborhood very similar to ours and pay almost $4,000 more per year in rent.

 

I bite my toungue all the time to keep from telling them that it costs me only about one tenth of that amount to buy curriculum for mine. And the irony is that, after a year in that school district, they pulled him out to homeschool. They are now considering a private school for him for next year.

 

In our case, the reason we live where we do is because my husband has a chronic back problem that is aggravated by driving. He also cannot do much in the way of physical upkeep on the house. So, we pay a little extra to live in a well-maintained, newish house within a 15-minute commute to his office in order to make life physically more comfortable for him. It also saves us on medical bills. When we lived farther away from his job, he ended up in the ER or at least making the rounds of various doctors at least once or twice a year.

 

So, given the need to be in a certain geographic area--and my husband's need to feel his family is safe--this is what is necessary to keep us "comfortable."

 

Could I make due or even be "comfortable" with less? Me, personally? Yes. However, my husband would be miserable--physically, if we moved too far out, and emotionally, if he had to go around feeling insecure about having the kids and me out and about in our own neighborhood or had to live somewhere that had too many maintenance problems--and that would make me extremely UNcomfortable.

 

This is one of the reasons I worded my original post the way I did, drawing a distinction between "subsistence" or even "meeting basic needs" and "comfort." My definition of comfort does allow for a few luxuries and a certain amount of discretion.

 

For example, we have season tickets to both the ballet and one local theatre. Those are big luxuries for us, even though our ballet tickets are in the balcony and we get a discount because my son takes classes at their school and the theatre tickets are the "preview night" ones that cost about one-third of the regular season package.

 

And our son take a full slate of dance classes at a good school. He could live without them, but they are an important part of his life. Doing without them would make him very unhappy. It wouldn't be deprivation, for sure, but it wouldn't be comfortable.

 

Being able to do things like this without having to go without groceries is what makes us "comfortable." But I consider us only just a bit more than comfortable, because we do have to budget carefully in order to allow for them.

[rafiki]

.

[mcconnellboys]

You sound a lot like me. We're lucky not to have a mortgage or car loans, but we also drive old cars and do carry some debt rather than pull investments to pay all off as we go. We are pretty simple in our desires and I always feel that we have all we want/need in life.

[rafiki]

.

[lulubelle]

The location definitely matters and not only that but the quality of the job. We live in a town where the median home price is $800K! Yes, we are choosing to live here, and it isn't easy, but my husband has a 3 mile commute and really likes his job. It is almost impossible to have it all. We could have a bigger house or a cheaper house 30 min. or more away from his place of work, but we also made the choice that we would settle for less in a house and have more time together. He can come home if i need him easily or help out to take my son to a hs class at the aquarium. And, he can come to the recreation center in town and watch the kids activities from time to time. And, we also go and have lunch with him at work too.

[Danestress]

that you have all of your needs and a few of your wants.

 

I realize that what is a "need" and what is a "want" are culturally determined and could cause serious debate on the board (and serious internal debate in my own mind and heart).

 

But for me, "comfortable" means that if your child needs glasses, you buy glasses. If your child is sick, you can choose whether to go to the doctor - that it's not all about the money. Comfortable means that you can have two cars in working order if that's what you really want, that your children can do the occasional "extra" like music or art, even though that is a clear "want" and not a need. It means that you can buy decent food to feed your family, and once in a while you can buy a bottle of wine or have an inexpensive meal out. It means that you can choose if you would rather have cable or get the newspaper, or subscribe to a magazine or have netflix - you won't have all of them, but you can have the one that means the most to you. To me "comfortable" means that you budget for things like clothes, shoes, and car repairs with actual money and that if you are thrifty and disciplined, you don't have to go into debt for actual "needs" like medical care, food, gasoline to get to work, heating in winter.

[Tree House Academy]

Unfortunately, our monthly bills come to around $6650/month and it is still not "comfortable" with what dh makes.

 

For me, comfortable is all that has been stated, but also being able to afford the occasional luxury...not having to save for months on end for a flat screen TV, not having to save up to buy homeschool materials for next year.

 

However, I am probably a bit weird in my opinions. My dh and I have "fun money" we take out twice a month. My amount is $300 a month just for me, dh's amount is $620 a month, just for him. This money includes gas for our cars as well, so dh's is much higher considering the drive he makes to work. I guess it is nutty to say that I want to be able to go out and just buy a nice TV when I want it, but I get enough in cash every two months to buy a couple of them. Oh well...I am not talking about spending *my* money...I mean just having it laying around to spend when I wish.

 

I base my thought on my ex FIL who, when asked to borrow some money once, came up with 4K without batting an eyelash. My ex husband and I both looked at each other and said, "now THAT is how I want to live!"

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I agree with the poster above me. Comfort is not a matter of keeping our bellies full, a roof over our heads, etc. That is necessity. Comfort is being able to afford the extras without harm to the budget or having to make sacrifices of one thing to pay for another. That is comfort in MY opinion.

Edited February 10, 2009 by Tree House Academy

[6packofun]

Exactly!! Well put. :iagree:

[Lovedtodeath]

Well, I have had medical bills averaging $800 a month for at least 10 years, so that affects my estimate. Even when I have insurance, natural remedies have always worked better and are not covered, or medical treatments are somehow turned down by my insurance company.

 

My groceries average $900 a month if you count toiletries, etc.

[fivetails]

Comfortable, to me, would mean not having to worry about $$$ -- I can't put a specific amount on that, or list things, because that stuff changes...it's just easiest to say "not having to worry" about the dollars. :)

[Carrie12345]

I agree with you to a certain extent, but not completely. As I wrote to Parisarah in another post, if your job is extremely specialized as is my dh's, there are only so many markets. We *must* live where we do because it is near my dh's sales territory, NYC. Any closer and it's more expensive; any further away, too far for him to drive.

 

Come to the Poconos! ;)

My dh's territory is NYC, too. The commute is awful though. We're looking forward to paying more to move back to NJ... where we're more comfortable. :D

[HRAAB]

For me, it's being able to choose frugality instead of being forced into it, if that makes sense. It's being able to pay the bills without having to skimp on something else, it's being able to feed the family well, participate in recreation that we enjoy and still be able to give a little.

 

Perfect description. Being able to practice voluntary simplicity. We live very comfortably based on the above description, however, some people might think we live like paupers. But that is our choice.

 

Janet

[StaceyinLA]

To me, being truly comfortable would be having the ability to do most of the things I WANT versus just being satisfied covering my needs. Comfortable would mean we could afford a vacation with having to sacrifice other things. Comfortable would mean that we could clothes shop when there is a massive sale going on versus having to wait on that "extra check" (you know how you get paid 5 times/month some months if you're on a weekly salary?). Comfortable would mean not ever having to worry about buying extra gas if I wanted to make spontaneous trips to my nieces house 2 hours away.

 

I would have to say that we are, for the most part, comfortable. Our income is right around $4500/month (net) and our bills don't usually total over $3200.00. We have a 5 bedroom house on 5 acres. It's nice (not Southern Living nice, but nice). Dh has a brand new work truck that is paid for by his company and all his gas is paid so that is worth $600 or so bucks/month. We have no car payments and no debt other than our house.

 

Our grocery budget isn't huge. I'd LOVE to be able to purchase every bit of my groceries at Whole Foods without a second thought. THAT would be comfortable to me - not having to worry about what garbage was in my food or reading labels.

 

We all have cell phones (but we no longer have a land line). My 3 driving kids have cars (they also have jobs and pay insurance/gas for their own cars). Two of them were given to us. My kids all have gadgets (iPods, digital cameras, their own computers, etc). It's not always the latest and greatest, and we often buy used or refurbished, but we have not been able to commit to various lessons and classes for each one over the years so we have bought those things for them.

 

We can usually take one short beach trip a year, though we did do Disney last year (I worked a summer project with the kids to raise the money), and it looks like we'll make a trip this year thanks to my part-time job, but there are SO many places I'd love to go and things I'd love to do.

 

We almost always have some type of medical/dental bill come up. With older cars and an older house there are almost always repairs popping up. We are able to pay things with cash and not use credit.

 

I know I am blessed. I have friends that have much more than us, but many have much more debt as well. I have friends with much less that struggle daily. We do give whenever possible and try to help people who need it as often as we can. I tend to do things for the kids of the families I know are struggling when I get the chance.

 

I guess I'm just saying that, though I am content and thankful for what we have, comfortable (in my opinion) would be a whole 'nuther level that we may never achieve.

 

And I'm sorry for rambling...

[Moni]

I don't live as comfortably as the half of you, but I'm still "comfortable

enough.

 

;)

 

:seeya:

[Kari C in SC]

For me, it's being able to choose frugality instead of being forced into it, if that makes sense. It's being able to pay the bills without having to skimp on something else, it's being able to feed the family well, participate in recreation that we enjoy and still be able to give a little.

 

:iagree:

 

Unfortunately, until we sell our other house - we are not there.

[newbie]

Living comfortable, is not mortgage and no bills.