My visit to the Catholic church....was not good....

[Tammy]

I want to first say....that I hope not to offend any Catholics here (or anyone else)....but....I did NOT like my experience there AT ALL.

 

I felt it was very impersonal using a projector to read the sermon (which had no focus)....and you can't even SEE the person who is actually reading it....although I couldn't understand anything he said since he had a thick Spanish accent.

 

At one point a person stood up at the front and read something from the Bible....again....no real focus on the 'message'. He never even looked at the parishioners....just read the piece...then sat down.

 

After 45 minutes of this stuff.....I had to get up and leave. I felt no reason to continue....I didn't get a THING out of it.

 

It also didn't seem like a 'community' of followers....

 

I think I would be more comfortable in a non-denominational church?

.

[asta]

I want to first say....that I hope not to offend any Catholics here (or anyone else)....but....I did NOT like my experience there AT ALL.

 

I felt it was very impersonal using a projector to read the sermon (which had no focus)....and you can't even SEE the person who is actually reading it....although I couldn't understand anything he said since he had a thick Spanish accent.

 

At one point a person stood up at the front and read something from the Bible....again....no real focus on the 'message'. He never even looked at the parishioners....just read the piece...then sat down.

 

After 45 minutes of this stuff.....I had to get up and leave. I felt no reason to continue....I didn't get a THING out of it.

 

It also didn't seem like a 'community' of followers....

 

I think I would be more comfortable in a non-denominational church?

.

 

Where on earth was this? I have never heard of such of thing.

 

 

a

[NoPlaceLikeHome]

I think you will find different services in different catholic churches. I have never experienced what you did in a catholic church at all. In fact, the services were quite nice:)

[Mrs Mungo]

Tammy, not all Catholic churches are going to be like that. I'm not Catholic but I've been to Catholic services that were lovely.

 

There are loads of different types of churches, even within a particular denomination. If you are seeking, check out a wide variety of churches. I hope you find something that is a good fit for you. :grouphug:

[aggieamy]

Where on earth was this? I have never heard of such of thing.

 

 

a

 

Ditto. In my 28 years of attending mass I've never heard of such a thing. I'd try another church in your area because that doesn't sound right.

[Renee in NC]

Where on earth was this? I have never heard of such of thing.

 

 

a

 

Me neither. I am so sorry that you had such a bad experience. I've never been in a Catholic Church that had a projector!

[Avila]

Me neither! Sorry that you had that experience. You wouldn't have at my parish, but I doubt you want to come to Illinois next week, do you? ;)

 

Different parishes have different styles of worhip. The readings and liturgical cycles will be the same, but the "flavors" can be quite different. Some parishes have better music than others, and some priests are more gifted as homilists.

 

Maybe you would want to try another parish before you write us off? ;)

 

OTOH, not everybody responds to liturgy or worship in the same way. Catholic Mass isn't really focused on what the worshipper gets from it but giving God worship in the way we think he has instructed us to do so. Sometimes I get a lot out of it, and sometimes I am only there out of obedience and out of wanting to give to God instead.

[mcconnellboys]

You could potentially find services such as this in any church of any denomination. I've been to many Catholic services as well as services of many Protestant denominations, but never to one such as this. While you might like a non-denominational service, you might also find other denominational services you would like.

[JenC3]

Again that just sounds like a bad service/church. Please do not think that reflects Catholics or the Mass. It would be like all Southern Baptist services including people who speak in tongues, etc. The Mass is an amazing prayar that Catholics say together so if you walk into even a wonderful service you may feel a bit left out if you d not pick up a missilette and follow along.

[elizabeth]

I have never been to a Catholic church with a projector. Did you observe the liturgy? What many call the constant stand up ,sit down, kneeling etc. The liturgy of the word and responsorial psalms where everyone repeats the portion of the psalms together? Did they have a processional with the palms for Palm Sunday ? I cannot imagine a Catholic service like that and I have been to many, many masses all over the country.

[HRAAB]

I almost want to ask if it was really a Catholic Church, as in Roman Catholic Church??? In 49 years of attending Mass every week, in many different states across the country, I have never, ever experienced anything like this. The Catholic Church is a liturgical church, there is certain way things are done, an order.

 

What you described is bizarre.

 

I wouldn't like it either and would probably walk out.

[nova147]

While I agree that your experience was atypical, I would highly recommend reading or talking with someone about the Mass before attending again. It's not complicated, but it's outside of what we normally experience, so some explanation can be very helpful. There is a "Catholicism for Dummies" book out there. But I'm sure someone could link you to a good online guide to the Mass. Or try to find a children's guide at a bookstore or library. They are good for a walkthrough of what's going on. And definitely try a different parish.

[3littlekeets]

Say What? Never heard of using a projector either. Sounds like an anomaly to me, sorry.

[Mejane]

I, too, have been to services that just felt like the parishoners were going through the motions. I think what is most beautiful about the Catholic church - the rituals and responses, etc. - can feel lifeless if the congregation is not really internalizing them. I've also been to amazing, uplifting services. Agree with the others - seek out some other parishes.

[Impish]

I don't think I've been to a Catholic service (beyond private baptisms, where it was only the invited present) since my eldest was 4. (He's turning 18 this year). At the end of the service, the priest stood at the door, shaking hands with ppl as they were leaving. The priest looked at me and my son, making no move to shake my extended hand, and inquired where my husband was. I told him I wasn't married. He told me, while glaring at my son, that I needed to atone for my sins. I was puzzled, and asked him what he was talking about. He pointed at my son, and told me I needed to beg forgiveness for having him out of wedlock.

 

I didn't handle that too well. :o I snapped that my son was a BLESSING from God, and that I certainly wasn't going to ask forgiveness for a blessing God had given me!!

 

Yes, I realize that it was that particular priest...but I haven't been back...and is part of the reason I avoid organized religion altogether.

[LauraGB]

I've been to about a million Catholic masses and I've never encountered what you describe. I'm sorry if that was your introduction. Has the church been around a while? Was it maybe some sort of new fusion-type church? Possibly try to find a Roman Catholic church (look for the really old cathedrals and go there ;)). The masses are steeped in ceremony and symbolism - absolutely beautiful to behold and not at all what you experienced! (and all that from a former Catholic!)

[WishboneDawn]

I want to first say....that I hope not to offend any Catholics here (or anyone else)....but....I did NOT like my experience there AT ALL.

 

I felt it was very impersonal using a projector to read the sermon (which had no focus)....and you can't even SEE the person who is actually reading it....although I couldn't understand anything he said since he had a thick Spanish accent.

 

At one point a person stood up at the front and read something from the Bible....again....no real focus on the 'message'. He never even looked at the parishioners....just read the piece...then sat down.

 

After 45 minutes of this stuff.....I had to get up and leave. I felt no reason to continue....I didn't get a THING out of it.

 

It also didn't seem like a 'community' of followers....

 

I think I would be more comfortable in a non-denominational church?

.

 

It's really important to remember that even within denominations individual church communities can vary widely in terms of practices and character. Heck, the two churches that are in my (Anglican) parish and are both serviced by the same minister but are still extremely different in terms of the people and the practice of the services.

 

The church you went to sounds like it's not for you. But if there's some appeal in the RC church for you then try a different church. Churches aren't standardized franchises, they're very often reflections of the immediate community the serve, regardless of the denomination.

[Caroline]

It's Palm Sunday. Is it possible that the service was much more crowded than normal and therefore things were a little off? I know at some of the large churches around here, there are overflow rooms are crowded Sundays where the service is viewed over closed circuit tv.

[Night Elf]

Again that just sounds like a bad service/church.

 

:iagree: I hope no one ever gives up trying a specific denomination based on the experience at one church, and I'm not a religious person. There are guest pastors at some churches and I've heard a few at my former churches to cringe at the idea new people might have been in that service and basing their entire experience on that one dude.

[TN Mama]

Sorry you had a bad experience. I get pretty high anxiety when visiting a new church, especially one of a different denomination (if I've never been before). I like to know ahead of time exactly what to expect. :)

 

If you identify with the Catholic faith, probably it would be a good idea to attend a service at a different church before deciding to go to a different denomination. I've been to many services across many denominations and it's rare to find two that are exactly the same. Best of luck to you.

[Melinda in VT]

I left the church in which I had been raised when I was about 30 and stepped into the wide world of church seeking, where everything felt foreign.

 

Based on my experience, I encourage you not to assume that what you saw on a single Sunday in a single Catholic church represents a typical Catholic service. (It may not even represent a typical service for that church.)

 

I would definitely check out other churches (including other Catholic churches). If there are reasons that particular Catholic church is attractive to you, I'd give them another try on a different Sunday.

 

And there are a lot of church choices in between Catholic and non-denominational.

 

When I was church seeking, I used the religion section of the local paper (ours was in the Saturday paper) to get an idea of the churches in our area. Many of them ran ads with the sermon topics for the next day. That helped me focus on churches that might be a good fit for me.

[HRAAB]

Also, whenever I've attended other church services, I always took some time to familiarize myself with their beliefs and how their church services were usually conducted so I wasn't walking in blind, so to speak. I've been to many different churches, and I'm glad I've done that. Over the last few years I've been to Quaker meetings with a relative, and I'm very glad I was prepared for how they work because they are so very, very different from the liturgical church I'm used to.

 

Still, what the OP experienced is NOT a typical Catholic Mass but knowing the order of the liturgy and what the Mass is would make it more accessible and understandable, whether it's your cup of tea or not. Same for all other churches.

[unsinkable]

On Palm Sunday, the Gospel reading is the Passion which is very long. Also, it has 4 parts...and one part is the people's part so maybe it was put on a projector so the people could participate.

 

I don't know.

 

I think OP would sound very harsh if she were talking about any religion.

 

"This stuff" indeed.

[FaithManor]

I am sorry you had that experience. I am protestant (sort of Methodist but not quite) and yet have had some wonderfully uplifting experiences at Catholic Church services.

 

My best memories are of three days I spent at St. Meinrad's Monastery in Southern Indiana. (I was there for a series of lectures by one of the priests on Ancient/Medieval church music.) The singing was gorgeous, the scripture readings were lovely and definitely related to the preaching, and it was stirring to hear the monks quoting huge passages from the Book of Psalms and Proverbs from memory. The prayers were uplifting and it was amazing just how many individuals were remembered in prayer. For this protestant, it was a joyful experience.

 

I've also been to Mass and Vespers with Catholic friends of ours and again, was blessed. So, I hope that you won't let this experience lead you to stereotype all Catholic churches.

 

Could it be that their priest was out of town or there were numerous illnesses so lay individuals without much time to plan were in charge? Just a thought....our own church had a really "weird' Sunday morning a few years ago when the pastor and ALL of the deacons had the stomach flu. Most of the musicians were sick as well and so those that got the call at 11:00 p.m. on Saturday night were just scrambling to think of what to do to put on a service.

 

Faith

[happyhappyjoyjoy]

As some have mentioned, Palm Sunday is not a good time to get a first impression of a church. Many people that only come out 4 times a year show up. Also, I'm sending you a PM, because I'm familiar w/ many parts of FL and can direct you to some wonderful parishes that you can visit for a better experience. I'm going to crack up if I happen to have been to this parish you went to today.

[Matryoshka]

I felt it was very impersonal using a projector to read the sermon (which had no focus)....and you can't even SEE the person who is actually reading it....although I couldn't understand anything he said since he had a thick Spanish accent.

 

 

I'm not Catholic, but I went to a Catholic high school (lots of masses), and live in an area with a high Catholic population and have been to lots of masses with friends in different churches. I have never, ever heard of a projector being used. In fact, the only church service I've ever been to that has used a projector was a non-denominational church. I think they're fairly common in the mega-churches. Maybe this church was trying to be more "current"??

 

I agree with the others that you should perhaps try another Catholic parish. The Episcopalean church services are also fairly similar to Catholic services.

[Joaly]

If you haven't already, you may want to get a book or two that explains what is really happening at the Mass, so that it will be more meaningful to you.

 

Here are two that I highly recommend:

 

The How To Book of the Mass - this describes all of the parts of the Mass including the scriptural roots of each prayer. http://www.amazon.com/How-Book-Mass-Everything-Taught/dp/1931709327

 

 

The Lamb's Supper: The Mass as Heaven on Earth - this is written by a former Presbyterian minister who converted to Catholicism. His perspective may be very helpful to you. http://www.amazon.com/Lambs-Supper-Mass-Heaven-Earth/dp/0385496591/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269817089&sr=1-1

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

I go to a Catholic church and we do have a projector. However the homily is *never* on it. What we get on that projector are the lyrics so we can sing with the choir, and something the "répond" (I don't know the English words, but it's what the people have to say in answer to some prayers) if they're not the standard ones.

We have two priests and they alternate for the homily. One priest is fantastic, as he's really talking to the audience, and expecting answers. The other one does just a long monologue. And then the deacon does it once in a while, and he just reads from his text. They all have their style, and hum, one is definitely better than the others :)

 

I must say that all three are thought provoking though, they're just harder to listen to.

[Parrothead]

Are you absolutely sure it was mass on Palm Sunday? Did you get a palm frond?

 

There was one of the longest Gospel readings of the year today - the Passion of Christ. Was that read by several people? That would have come before the homily.

 

I can't imaging what you described.

 

Please, what every you do, do not judge the Catholic church on this one experience.

[Tammy]

that this church (and maybe all Catholic churches) are a bit too formal for my liking. Also....it was a pretty big church....not the small community of people I was wanting. I guess you never know what to expect without visiting?

 

We plan on trying out another church this Sunday...it is a Presbyterian church, much smaller than the Catholic church.

 

I was trying to find something somewhat close to my house.

 

I hope everyone knows how little I know about churches.....so maybe it was just me. I didn't feel comfortable there....and want a more 'friendly' kind of church....hence the smaller one....maybe?

 

.

[Tammy]

Sorry you were offended. I have NO religious background....and am just trying to find a suitable church for my son. I also plan to attend with him....so I am trying to find something we both like.

 

.

[Parrothead]

Sorry you were offended. I have NO religious background....and am just trying to find a suitable church for my son. I also plan to attend with him....so I am trying to find something we both like.

 

.

Check your pm's when you get a minute.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

that this church (and maybe all Catholic churches) are a bit too formal for my liking. .

 

That is quite possible. I do find it quite formal usually. I like it that way. You may not. And I won't be thinking less of you for it. :) Different people, different strokes.

[PollyOR]

I don't know.

 

I think OP would sound very harsh if she were talking about any religion.

 

"This stuff" indeed.

 

If I were the OP, I would feel discouraged by what you wrote.

 

Tammy, do I remember correctly that you are pagan?

[unsinkable]

Sorry you were offended. I have NO religious background....and am just trying to find a suitable church for my son. I also plan to attend with him....so I am trying to find something we both like.

 

.

 

It wasn't just the 2 words.

 

It was the whole post.

 

I think you could have substituted any religion and it would have been just as harsh.

[unsinkable]

If I were the OP, I would feel discouraged by what you wrote.

 

Tammy, do I remember correctly that you are pagan?

 

I stand by my words.

 

There are less harsh ways of saying what she had to say.

[Hedgehogs4]

I'm not even catholic and i'm going to say this does. not. sound. like. normal.

 

if you are looking for something liturgical, but not necessarily roman catholic, orthodox anglican churches may fit the bill for you.

 

ETA i hadn't read your other post saying you knew very little about churches. we are members of an anglican church which is much less formal than roman catholic, but still retains the historical structure with the liturgy, etc. i agree with the PPs who said that the palm sunday liturgy is very different, very long...so do not lose heart! Keep looking.

 

also, by all means go to church on Easter Sunday, but if whatever church you go to seems to not be what you expect, do not lose heart. it is the "other" major holiday in the church calendar, christmas being the "other" bit day, so people come out of the woodwork to go to church. it's always a little different on easter.

Edited March 28, 2010 by Hedgehogs4

[Matryoshka]

that this church (and maybe all Catholic churches) are a bit too formal for my liking. Also....it was a pretty big church....not the small community of people I was wanting. I guess you never know what to expect without visiting?

 

I have to say that I never "got" that much out of all those Catholic masses I attended. I know a lot of people love the liturgical nature of them, but I didn't feel spiritually "fed", if that makes any sense. I think I always felt a bit like I should, but I didn't. Growing up, my family didn't attend church, except very briefly an Episcopalean one, which is fairly similar to Catholic, so I didn't really know what else was out there.

 

When we first started attending the church we belong to, it felt really odd, because it was so different - but now I really liked it, and do feel "fed" every week. Although the first time I went, it was "RE Sunday", where all the kids from RE present something, and there's no sermon. That was really odd -I actually didn't go back for a while. We tried a few other churches, and they didn't click, and when we went back to the first one, the pastor had changed and it was a more "normal" service for that church.

 

It's a very personal thing, what "clicks" for you. What exactly are you looking for in a church? There's such a wide range of people here, you might be able to get help getting pointed in a general direction of something that will work better for you. I fall way more on the liberal end of things; our church is UCC/UUA - yeah, we've got two denominations. :tongue_smilie:

Edited March 28, 2010 by matroyshka

[unsinkable]

How does this sound:

 

My visit to the Jewish temple....was not good....

 

I want to first say....that I hope not to offend any Jewish people here (or anyone else)....but....I did NOT like my experience there AT ALL.

 

I felt it was very impersonal using a projector to read the Torah (which had no focus)....and you can't even SEE the person who is actually reading it....although I couldn't understand anything he said since he had a thick Israeli accent.

 

At one point a person stood up at the front and read something from the Torah....again....no real focus on the 'message'. He never even looked at the parishioners....just read the piece...then sat down.

 

After 45 minutes of this stuff.....I had to get up and leave. I felt no reason to continue....I didn't get a THING out of it.

 

It also didn't seem like a 'community' of followers....

 

I think I would be more comfortable in a ________?

 

I have no background is Judaism, BTW.

 

It sounds harsh no matter what religion you are writing about.

[LG Gone Wild]

Sorry you were offended. I have NO religious background....and am just trying to find a suitable church for my son. I also plan to attend with him....so I am trying to find something we both like.

 

.

 

Well, instead of fruitlessly church shopping, what does your son want to do? A suitable church would be the one belonging to the denomination he identifies with, Catholic or not. If he picks a church that you don't particularly fancy or enjoy, well, it is only an hour to sit through and you can look forward to brunch afterward with your son. You wouldn't be there for conversion anyway, merely to partake in something important to your ds.

[milovany]

I disagree. It doesn't sound harsh to me in the least. It sounds like Tammy, who hasn't had a background that has included church attendance (but who has some interest now) wasn't really impressed with the service that she attended today. That's all -- neither the Jewish version or the Catholic version sounded harsh to me.

[PollyOR]

:thumbup1: BTW Tammy, I want to tell you how impressed I am that you are doing this for your son. Personally, I know it would put me way out of comfort zone if one my kids made this request.

[Hedgehogs4]

okay, really? nitpicking Tammy's words is not the way to make someone feel welcome. let it go. why is OP apologizing? it was her first experience going to church, and if this is her feeling, it's her feeling. Can't we just be supportive here and not flame her for trying to sort out what she experienced?

[grace'smom]

I went to mass today and we all received a long, detailed booklet that depicted the last moments of Jesus' life. The priest read most of it, but there were also other people reading (there was a person reading the words of Pilate, Herod, Simon, the thieves who were crucified alongside Jesus, and the church members read the part of the crowd, etc.). This took a good 10 or 15 minutes, and it was a very somber affair. I wonder if perhaps there was some semblance of this reading that was put on the projector at your church because they didn't want to print off all that paper. My booklet was four 8.5 x 11 pages, which I am sure was NOT cheap to print and I can understand if a church used a projector instead. But I am glad mine did because it's beautiful and I now I have it to keep.

 

In any case, we were actually instructed not to speak to anyone on our way outside the church. To me, hearing the way Jesus was treated in his last moments, it really is a very somber, sad mass to attend even though it begins in celebration with the palms. It was also packed beyond reason. There are usually plenty of seats available, but today I was packed into the back with my daughter on the floor even though I got there early.

 

So, if you attended a Catholic church today, you should know that the nature of Palm Sunday may have made the church seem different than usual. It may be that the Catholic church isn't for you, and that's just fine, but just know that it was an unusual mass today. :001_smile:

[Ibbygirl]

Tammy, are you in South Florida perchance?? My church has an AWESOME kid's ministry. They always have so much going on for the kids and they absolutely love it! There are also satellite branches in Boca, Plantation, Hollywood and the Keys if one of those is more convenient although Ft. Lauderdale is the "home" campus. http://www.calvaryftl.org

[michelle l]

I've been attending church my entire life, and one thing that has struck me recently is how difficult it is to feel comfortable in a church that I am visiting as opposed to my home church. It can be very awkward and uncomfortable to fully participate in a service when I'm not familiar with the church. I just can't quite settle in, and feel a bit nervous I guess, not knowing exactly what to expect. I can only imagine that feeling would be intensified if I had no church background whatsoever.

 

It can be hard to get an accurate impression of a church in one visit, and it's best to attend a few times unless you can just tell something isn't going to be a good fit. It sounds like you're already thinking you might feel more comfortable in a smaller church.

 

Best of luck. I hope you'll push through the discomfort and find a place that's right for you and your son to attend.

[Margo out of lurking]

How does this sound:

 

My visit to the Jewish temple....was not good....

 

:chillpill: I think you're being overly touchy here. I did substitute my church, and I would not have been offended. Tammy wasn't personally attacking you; I'm not sure why a different wording would have made you feel any better. It wouldn't have changed her opinion.

 

Tammy, it's great that you have an idea what you are looking for, and that you aren't easily discouraged. I am always a little nervous going to any new church. I'm praying for you to find the right one for you and your ds.

[Nakia]

I don't think the OP sounded harsh at all. I feel like Tammy was very respectful in her post, and she is obviously trying to find a church, so it seems to me we could all be supportive of her.

 

I really hope you find a place where you fit, Tammy. :grouphug::grouphug:

[Audrey]

Where on earth was this? I have never heard of such of thing.

 

 

a

 

 

I have Asta. The Catholic churches I've been to around here use projectors. Also, if you are an "outsider" they aren't necessarily the friendliest bunch. They tend to get offended if you don't know the whole stand-up-sit-down routine.

 

On the other hand, I did go to Catholic church once for a special service and it was a very different climate! Very friendly and helpful to newcomers. I think there are plenty of ... shall we say, "lackluster" churches in any denomination. It behooves one looking for a church to shop around and find a place where they feel they really belong.

 

To Tammy: good on you, girl, for doing this for your son!:thumbup: I'm sure you could find something suitable for you both, but it could take a while.

Edited March 29, 2010 by Audrey

[unsinkable]

I did try to help by saying perhaps the format was b/c of Palm Sunday.

 

It's fine if people disagree with me. But people see what they want to see.

 

I went to a Buddhist temple once for a service. I can honestly say I didn't understand a word of the chalisas that were being chanted b/c it was a foreign lang. (maybe Hindi?) but I never would have walked out before the service was over and then said I got nothing out of it.