Can ya'll help me revise my makeup policy?

[Dmmetler]

I have had a very, very liberal makeup policy since coming back in fall of 2020. Basically, I don't want your kid anywhere near me if they're sick or anyone in your family is. I set up my schedule on an online sign up and you can sign up for lessons in any open slot, plus I have partial weeks open for just makeups, so there are ample opportunities. 
 

This semester, I have three parents who regularly no show and then sign up for a makeup. Sometimes they give an excuse, usually "sorry, work ran late"-after the fact.  I've had a lot of kids showing up with "allergies"-which led to me losing my voice for a week when I caught someone's "allergies", so I don't feel like makeups are being used for their desired purpose. 
 

I don't want to incentivize coming sick. And I understand that you may not be able to call in sick 24 hours in advance. But I am definitely feeling taken advantage of, and I want to tighten up the policy next year. 

[TheReader]

Can you instill a limit to how many make-ups are allowed w/o prior notice? Something like "each student is allowed (2? 3? 4?) make-up sessions per semester, regardless of notice, because I'd rather not get sick and pass those germs on! Once that limit has been reached, make-ups may only be scheduled with permission from the instructor &/or in cases where 24 hr notice was given prior to the missed class. It disrupts the instructors time and schedule to have last-minute no-shows, so after the (1st? 2nd? 3rd?) no-show without *any* prior notice (1 hr minimum), students will need to pay for the missed class as well as the make-up class." 

Something like that, anyway. Sounds like a conundrum, for sure!

[maize]

Maybe offer two sick day make-ups for everyone per term, and explain that more may be requested for extenuating circumstances such as extended sickness. 

You might want a separate policy for planned absences such as for a family holiday or other planned-in-advance event. Maybe 1-2 planned-in-advance absence makeups and 2 sick day makeups?

I assume you are already making it clear that you really take sickness seriously out of necessity.

[regentrude]

If they are sick, they know before the lesson. For a makeup, they must notify you ahead of time, perhaps the morning of. No shows without prior notice don't get makeups.

[QueenCat]

Ugh... I was expecting a question about you trying to figure out where & when you do not wear cosmetics.

Edited April 18 by QueenCat
typo

[MercyA]

22 minutes ago, QueenCat said:

Ugh... I was expecting a question about you trying to figure out when & when you do not wear cosmetics.

Same. 🙂 

Dmmetler, you are a very kind person and I'm sorry people have been taking advantage of that. Love the suggestions you've received so far.

[Harriet Vane]

44 minutes ago, regentrude said:

If they are sick, they know before the lesson. For a makeup, they must notify you ahead of time, perhaps the morning of. No shows without prior notice don't get makeups.

I taught online for almost a decade. My policy was that I offer fourteen sessions per semester. If you miss, too bad. If I miss, I will make sure to offer a make up session so that you get your fourteen sessions. 

In reality, if people approached me ahead of time, I was often willing to reschedule. I almost always accommodated people's vacations, for example. If someone was really sick and they told me ahead of time, I might offer to schedule a make up session. But that was never, ever a written policy--it was a kindness I chose to extend to parents who contacted me ahead of time. 

[maize]

55 minutes ago, Harriet Vane said:

I taught online for almost a decade. My policy was that I offer fourteen sessions per semester. If you miss, too bad. If I miss, I will make sure to offer a make up session so that you get your fourteen sessions. 

In reality, if people approached me ahead of time, I was often willing to reschedule. I almost always accommodated people's vacations, for example. If someone was really sick and they told me ahead of time, I might offer to schedule a make up session. But that was never, ever a written policy--it was a kindness I chose to extend to parents who contacted me ahead of time. 

I think the challenge in this case is that OP has health challenges and really needs to avoid getting sick. A generous makeup policy is meant to encourage students not to come for a lesson if they are at all sick.

Edited April 17 by maize

[kbutton]

2 hours ago, TheReader said:

Can you instill a limit to how many make-ups are allowed w/o prior notice? Something like "each student is allowed (2? 3? 4?) make-up sessions per semester, regardless of notice, because I'd rather not get sick and pass those germs on! Once that limit has been reached, make-ups may only be scheduled with permission from the instructor &/or in cases where 24 hr notice was given prior to the missed class. It disrupts the instructors time and schedule to have last-minute no-shows, so after the (1st? 2nd? 3rd?) no-show without *any* prior notice (1 hr minimum), students will need to pay for the missed class as well as the make-up class." 

Something like that, anyway. Sounds like a conundrum, for sure!

I like this with some kind of understanding about how vacations work.

For super flaky parents…my son had a guitar teacher that will take established students on a whim, but they get scheduled last. So, if you had lessons but needed to quit or are busy, and you want a brush up lesson once a month or whatever, he would take you as his schedule allows. If you are willing to do something like that, I don’t know if that would help with families that need flexibility but are abusing the policy rather than discussing that, but I mention it just because I’ve seen it done.

[Clemsondana]

My kids have done private lessons for sports and music, and dealing with flaky no-show parents has been a challenge - one coach said that it was the push that finally got him to retire.  Our music teacher has 'studio rules' that sound pretty draconian - you pay whether you come or not, cancel by a certain time that day, must make-up within certain time period, etc.  But, she only enforces it on flaky parents.  She never charges when we go on vacation during the school year or have to miss for some reason, she'll do a zoom lesson if kid is sick but not too sick to play, etc.  But, other than summer when everything is flexible, we only cancel/reschedule something 1-2 times a year, if that.  We've taken for 10 years and probably haven't had to adjust a non-summer lesson a dozen times.  And we've moved times and days when she needs to reschedule, too.  

[Wheres Toto]

It sounds to me like your bigger issue is kids showing up sick.  I would add to the policy that if your kid shows up and is showing any signs of illness - "including x, y, or z" - you will cancel the lesson immediately and a makeup will not be offered.   Maybe start off with something about it being very important to not send kids to their lesson sick.   Maybe offer a zoom lesson if they are unsure or the kid isn't too sick, but that when in doubt, they should stay home.   If lessons are cancelled at least x hours prior to the lesson, a makeup class can be scheduled.  

[lauraw4321]

Our piano teacher offers zoom lessons as a way to combat showing up sick. I think it works well. We’ve used it when things are a bit on the fence. She also charges the same amount regardless of whether you make all of your lessons. She does help parents connect with each other to switch. We’ve missed more than I would like this year due to other activities but I know that’s on us, so it’s fair to me. 

[maize]

12 hours ago, Clemsondana said:

My kids have done private lessons for sports and music, and dealing with flaky no-show parents has been a challenge - one coach said that it was the push that finally got him to retire.  Our music teacher has 'studio rules' that sound pretty draconian - you pay whether you come or not, cancel by a certain time that day, must make-up within certain time period, etc.  But, she only enforces it on flaky parents.  She never charges when we go on vacation during the school year or have to miss for some reason, she'll do a zoom lesson if kid is sick but not too sick to play, etc.  But, other than summer when everything is flexible, we only cancel/reschedule something 1-2 times a year, if that.  We've taken for 10 years and probably haven't had to adjust a non-summer lesson a dozen times.  And we've moved times and days when she needs to reschedule, too.  

Charging the same whether kids show up or not is in my experience the rule not the exception for most private music studios-- there's a set monthly fee, paid in advance, that reserves your lesson time every week--meaning the teacher can't schedule another student in that slot and you are paying for the teacher's reserved time whether you use it or not. That's not a draconian policy, it's industry standard in professional music teacher circles. 

Makes perfect sense too. 

[Harriet Vane]

1 hour ago, Wheres Toto said:

It sounds to me like your bigger issue is kids showing up sick.  I would add to the policy that if your kid shows up and is showing any signs of illness - "including x, y, or z" - you will cancel the lesson immediately and a makeup will not be offered.   Maybe start off with something about it being very important to not send kids to their lesson sick.   Maybe offer a zoom lesson if they are unsure or the kid isn't too sick, but that when in doubt, they should stay home.   If lessons are cancelled at least x hours prior to the lesson, a makeup class can be scheduled.  

This seems the most sensible to me. 

[Faith-manor]

When I had an active music studio, my policy was that lessons were paid for a month at a time, and then unless it was an emergency, no notice flake outs did not get a make up lesson, and if a child came to me with symptoms of being sick, the parent would have to take them home, no make up. I did not allow drop and run. Parents had to stay in the waiting room or in their cars. If they did not observe the policy, there was a three strikes and out penalty that kicked in. Flaky parents could petition to restart lessons but only if they were willing to pay tuition a semester at a time after that. I was VERY kind to people who had emergencies, disabled children - one of my students had a sibling with cancer so I always refunded money when medical appointments made it impossible to make lessons that week because I knew who important it was for the student to continue with lessons if possible just for a sense of normalcy. I also had a policy that if parents talked about their financial arrangements with me, there would be some reckoning. I always offered 3 scholarships per semester, and it wasn't anyone else's business who got them.

It was all spelled out in a business contract that outlined parent responsibilities, instructor responsibilities, and student responsibility. This was signed before they could take the first lesson. I had a waiting list of 30 students hoping to get a spot at one point, so it was common knowledge that if the parent was flaky, they might end up out of the studio because there were plenty of kids waiting in the wings.

I didn't like being hard nosed. But what so found out was that if I wasn't, I would just be taken advantage of all the time by a certain subset of parents, and their children wouldn't make progress because the role model of lack of priority of lessons over just another anything else. "Susie got invited to a play date so we forgot." Nope. Bye bye.

[ScoutTN]

4 hours ago, Wheres Toto said:

It sounds to me like your bigger issue is kids showing up sick.  I would add to the policy that if your kid shows up and is showing any signs of illness - "including x, y, or z" - you will cancel the lesson immediately and a makeup will not be offered.   Maybe start off with something about it being very important to not send kids to their lesson sick.   Maybe offer a zoom lesson if they are unsure or the kid isn't too sick, but that when in doubt, they should stay home.   If lessons are cancelled at least x hours prior to the lesson, a makeup class can be scheduled.  

Yes!

[ScoutTN]

My tutoring center bills for the coming month on the 15th, and they have a strict cancellation policy. Tutors are able to add some grace, but have the strict policy to keep flaky people from taking advantage.

Their sick policy is not as good. Yeah, I have a bad cold right now that I got from a student’s “allergies”. 

[prairiewindmomma]

2 hours ago, Faith-manor said:

When I had an active music studio, my policy was that lessons were paid for a month at a time, and then unless it was an emergency, no notice flake outs did not get a make up lesson, and if a child came to me with symptoms of being sick, the parent would have to take them home, no make up. I did not allow drop and run. Parents had to stay in the waiting room or in their cars. If they did not observe the policy, there was a three strikes and out penalty that kicked in. Flaky parents could petition to restart lessons but only if they were willing to pay tuition a semester at a time after that. I was VERY kind to people who had emergencies, disabled children - one of my students had a sibling with cancer so I always refunded money when medical appointments made it impossible to make lessons that week because I knew who important it was for the student to continue with lessons if possible just for a sense of normalcy. I also had a policy that if parents talked about their financial arrangements with me, there would be some reckoning. I always offered 3 scholarships per semester, and it wasn't anyone else's business who got them.

It was all spelled out in a business contract that outlined parent responsibilities, instructor responsibilities, and student responsibility. This was signed before they could take the first lesson. I had a waiting list of 30 students hoping to get a spot at one point, so it was common knowledge that if the parent was flaky, they might end up out of the studio because there were plenty of kids waiting in the wings.

I didn't like being hard nosed. But what so found out was that if I wasn't, I would just be taken advantage of all the time by a certain subset of parents, and their children wouldn't make progress because the role model of lack of priority of lessons over just another anything else. "Susie got invited to a play date so we forgot." Nope. Bye bye.

This.

Not having strict boundaries = a notable subsection of the populace will not respect you or your time. 

 

[kirstenhill]

I think a stricter no-show/cancellation policy with virtual lessons for sick kids would be a great option if you were able to offer that.   Every now and then a kid might be so sick they can't even do their lesson virtually, but I feel like a lot of the time when I've had to skip a lesson for a sick kid it was more for a runny nose or a low-grade fever that was mostly under control (i.e. the kid could still do stuff, it just hadn't been 24 hrs since it was higher) or even a kid who threw up a couple hours ago but is feeling better now.   It is easier though, I have to say, to feel like I can send my guitar student to a lesson mildly sick b/c he can wear a mask.  Not so much for my flute student.   😄 

Make-up lessons are great but at least for my family they are so hard to schedule...we are packed with different things on different days, and I would much rather just get it over with virtually.  But I'd even be fine skipping a lesson and still paying for it every now and then, which maybe most families wouldn't be ok with.  I have a certain amount budgeted per month for lessons, and if I have a sick kid and we miss a lesson...the money is already allocated, it's just to me "one of those things" that happens.   But I am probably in the minority - the teachers seem to usually encourage finding a make up time.

 

Edited April 18 by kirstenhill

[kbutton]

It’s interesting to me how many of you are or have instructors with draconian policies who make exceptions.

We were late to start music lessons because I took all the posted draconian rules and gospel and figured we’d hate the experience. ETA: “as gospel”

We are exactly the people that need some flexibility but do not abuse it, but it would never occur to me to bother calling a studio that posted strict rules, so that colors my earlier feedback.

Eventually we found the right teacher, but it was via friendship. My kids NEEDED music lessons but rigid policies wouldn’t have worked.

And side note…we did speech therapy with a provider that had fairly predatory practices, but it was the only place offering this kind of therapy; it was rigid beyond rigidity, and she did a lot of unethical stuff with employees. Many finally left. We were not allowed to have holidays and vacations at all. We were expected to be there 52 weeks per year for years at a time (multiple kids for multiple appointments per week). We had to build in ways to flake for sanity’s sake (and we still hardly ever missed). We liberally took snow days because this was really the only excuse they found acceptable other than illness, and we didn’t get sick (and we only used snow days a couple of times—liberal means I could drive safely in the weather but I knew many local people could not, so I played the safety card). So, rigidity can bite both ways. If they had allowed a week off now and then, they could’ve filled some of those slots instead of having last minute cancellations—they ALWAYS had people wanting to get extra sessions in. 

 

 

Edited April 18 by kbutton

[lewelma]

Ever since covid, I have a strict don't-come-if-you-are-sick policy.  And guess what, I quit getting sick all the time.  If a kid is sick, I make up the lessons online at the same time slot (either with them at school or at home but both online away from me). If they show up sick, or with 'allergies', I make a stink about it, and then we both wear masks and I open all the windows and we put jackets on.  They don't usually do it a second time. I make space for 1 very sick, cancels-all-the-time student each year (migraines, leukemia, etc), but I only can do this for 1 student because it is just too hard to have constant moving around kids.  I know you are in music, so clearly not as easy as for me in math, but my older boy does online music lessons, so I know it can work, just not as good. 

The goal is to say you canNOT come sick (no exceptions), but then to make the make-up option not great, so they only use it if they are actually sick. If a kid is *really* sick, I will organize with the kid directly to make-up when they are better. 

In contrast, I have flexible policy for school trips/sports/work/medical appointments.  If you give me 3 days notice, I will switch you into an open slot.  The kids work directly with me by text to do this. Some kids move a lot, others never.  But if they all give me 3 days notice, then I know about open slots.  

Edited April 18 by lewelma

[prairiewindmomma]

Rigidity isn't necessarily around "having to be there".  I pay for the time slot whether I use it or not.  I'm paying for their availability. So, maybe we "miss" a week because dd had a medical appointment---but that instructor had scheduled their life to be there, and still has all of their prep and administrative stuff to do regardless of whether my kid could be there or not. I respect their time and expertise, and I pay for it. We just aren't always there to take advantage of that.  Life happens.  If they offered me a makeup, great, but I don't expect that (and I don't receive it, fwiw). 

Speech therapy is a bit different because it's billed to a third party, generally.  You physically have to be there. We did years of therapy---and the policy your speech therapist had seems absolutely ridiculous.  It's no wonder people left. FWIW, as far as medical versus activities go---I generally have a policy that I try to schedule all medical for certain days and leave at least two days a week open for "life". The only times we haven't been able to do that have been during radiation and daily chemo, which, understandably, you've got to be there every dang day. Even then, we picked a time slot where we could fit in a bit of life around it. Medical is what keeps life going....but a few "life" activities have always been prioritized over medical in terms of time slots. 

[kbutton]

5 minutes ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Rigidity isn't necessarily around "having to be there".  I pay for the time slot whether I use it or not.  I'm paying for their availability. So, maybe we "miss" a week because dd had a medical appointment---but that instructor had scheduled their life to be there, and still has all of their prep and administrative stuff to do regardless of whether my kid could be there or not. I respect their time and expertise, and I pay for it. We just aren't always there to take advantage of that.  Life happens.  If they offered me a makeup, great, but I don't expect that (and I don't receive it, fwiw). 

Speech therapy is a bit different because it's billed to a third party, generally.  You physically have to be there. We did years of therapy---and the policy your speech therapist had seems absolutely ridiculous.  It's no wonder people left. FWIW, as far as medical versus activities go---I generally have a policy that I try to schedule all medical for certain days and leave at least two days a week open for "life". The only times we haven't been able to do that have been during radiation and daily chemo, which, understandably, you've got to be there every dang day. Even then, we picked a time slot where we could fit in a bit of life around it. Medical is what keeps life going....but a few "life" activities have always been prioritized over medical in terms of time slots. 

I understand that people are paying for a slot, but a lack of flexibility denies entire groups of people who do have life come up. We have the whole gamut of stuff, and I don’t have a spouse that can flex because his job is all over the map. FWIW, the most prestigious and busy studio either of our kids had lessons with was very flexible; I was stunned. There was always another kid (or adult) who could take your spot if you gave notice; you just realized your missed lesson went to the bottom of the priority box for rescheduling. Easy peasy. 

A lack of flexibility means that low-income, single parent (or functionally single parent, medically challenged people are cut out of things that enrich life (and I would argue promote healing and brain development); the same people who get harranged about balance: we are THAT family that always gets blamed for any way in which we’re not typical while simultaneously being told, “I really don’t know how you do what you do.” It defies logic. But we are not flaky except socially, and that has more to do with the pressure of trying to host with a chaotic life and a lot about a functionally absent HoH who hasn’t figured out how to be a team member when home, to be frank. 

(Side note: I have lots of scheduling policies to protect sanity. What you do is not even always possible for us, and that’s fine—we find our own way. We have medical providers that are restricted to specific offices, days, times, and our complex medical kid has three rare conditions, two of which are unrelated to each other. His health system has some “clinic” days where they try to combine appointments into one block of time and one location, but he rarely needs that specific block—the issues he has are outside those specialties and times even when those clinics are meant to cover his main diagnosis. We are ALWAYS special like that. We are always the exception to the rule.)

My point was more that when a studio is advertised as draconian, we don’t even try, but it sounds like we should’ve felt free to since we aren’t flaky. I know that dmmetler attracts families who are more like us. If that is her bread and butter, it sounds like it’s not only about policy but about communicating the right things to the right families—if a studio tightened up a policy and didn’t speak to me individually, I would feel like our family would have to quit. I would have to have a long-term relationship to not feel like I was being targeted. I have good reading comprehension, and I would assume that people mean what they say, or they wouldn’t bother to put it in writing.

But I am from a small town where people have relationships all over the place (life is messy). This business of expecting strangers to say one thing (in writing no less) and do another is…not sure of the word, but it seems illogical. A draconian policy posted on a website says, “We take people for whom the sun shines every day, and their poo smells like roses, and on the rare occasion they have a problem, money covers it. All others need not apply. Especially those for whom lesson money is a loving and sacrificial investment.” 

 

[Faith-manor]

48 minutes ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Rigidity isn't necessarily around "having to be there".  I pay for the time slot whether I use it or not.  I'm paying for their availability. So, maybe we "miss" a week because dd had a medical appointment---but that instructor had scheduled their life to be there, and still has all of their prep and administrative stuff to do regardless of whether my kid could be there or not. I respect their time and expertise, and I pay for it. We just aren't always there to take advantage of that.  Life happens.  If they offered me a makeup, great, but I don't expect that (and I don't receive it, fwiw). 

Speech therapy is a bit different because it's billed to a third party, generally.  You physically have to be there. We did years of therapy---and the policy your speech therapist had seems absolutely ridiculous.  It's no wonder people left. FWIW, as far as medical versus activities go---I generally have a policy that I try to schedule all medical for certain days and leave at least two days a week open for "life". The only times we haven't been able to do that have been during radiation and daily chemo, which, understandably, you've got to be there every dang day. Even then, we picked a time slot where we could fit in a bit of life around it. Medical is what keeps life going....but a few "life" activities have always been prioritized over medical in terms of time slots. 

Right. Totally on point.

Kbutton,again, what was on paper was mostly to control the flaky people who want to sign their kids up for lessons, but will cancel whenever the notion takes them or bring sick kids. As I said in my post, when communicating privately with parents, I was kind, and when I had the time to be generous with make up lessons, I did that. The issue is if the official policy is not very explicit and a bit rigid, the subset of parents that will use and abuse the teacher is NOT small. Part and parcel of that is that music is not celebrated and prioritized or seen as worthy compared to sports or just about anything else. I know school sport coaches who are a FAR more rigid than I ever was and punished kids all the time, very harshly, for flakiness on the parent or student's part. I live in a sports culture that has no problem punishing kids for not showing up to practice with a temperature and puking on a 100 degree day. I know a lot of parents who subjected their kids to all kinds of insanity for sports or for social events, but wouldn't have had an ounce of respect for me and my studio schedule unless I forced it. 

To be honest, the single policy that did the most to control the issues was pre-paying a month or a semester at a time. If they pay for it, then they are more likely to be committed, and to communicate if a child has been sick or there is a family emergency or conflict with medical care or car that wouldn't start or whatever. And everyone was credited if school was canceled due to nasty winter roads. But knowing that they were paying to keep their time slot, made them more likely to show up and also carve out time for their child to practice. Learning to play and instrument or develop vocal skills require regular practice outside the lesson. Yet parents will often not consider this and their scheduling unless there is a financial penalty for failure to implement practice opportunities. Such is the way of this culture. My sister assures me this is not w concern in France where students and parents consider it a privilege to take private lessons, and music teachers are greatly respected.

I think that to paint those of us who spent hours and hours of time sitting around waiting for people to show up who don't, and think they shouldn't have to pay for our time as being nasty people who don't care for low income families is really unfair. My income was used to support our family, same as any other job. Why should I be treated that way? Who is entitled to treat someone else with so little respect? I had many not remotely well off families who took lessons from me, and took advantage of the multi-student discount. I had families who applied for and received the scholarship which was FREE instruction. Just because someone is low income doesn't also mean they get to disregard someone else or take a slot from another deserving student because they are not committed to the very thing they said they would commit to do. On top of which, private music instructors make less per hour than just about anyone else with a bachelor's degree. Sorry for expecting that my family should have some benefit for the hours I spent teaching instead of being with them.

This is no different than private school tuition. You still pay even if your kid misses school. No one can budget for a music studio if they can't count on the income, just like a school can't operate if it can't count on the budgeted income and the students by in large, being there to be taught. The attitude of parents that music teachers should have low expectations, low pay, maximum flexibility, and no respect is why many of us retired.

Personally, what I would really love is for communities to sponsor music instruction as much as they sponsor sports, and for schools to hire instrument specialists as part of their band and voice programs so that we didn't have to worry about contracting privately and all students have access.

Since that is never going to happen, then this is what is left.

And again, what was on paper was to discourage parents who would sign up on a whim, and then treat me like either a babysitting service (had dads who would try to sneakily drop off their other kids and not just their student so they could run off for forty five minutes by themselves) or never show, never call, or bring a feverish kid to my house. It is bad enough when a child does not know they are sick and pukes all over the piano. It is quite another when the parent picks them up from school, knows they are sick, and drops them and leaves. I shouldn't have had to even spell out a policy about not dropping and running, but such is life with so many selfish parents in the community. I made it know that they could call and talk if they ran into issues. More times than not, we worked it out. I honestly think the tough policy made parents call who would have otherwise just flaked.

[Clarita]

1 hour ago, kbutton said:

understand that people are paying for a slot, but a lack of flexibility denies entire groups of people who do have life come up. We have the whole gamut of stuff, and I don’t have a spouse that can flex because his job is all over the map. FWIW, the most prestigious and busy studio either of our kids had lessons with was very flexible; I was stunned. There was always another kid (or adult) who could take your spot if you gave notice; you just realized your missed lesson went to the bottom of the priority box for rescheduling. Easy peasy. 

Not every provider can do or schedule like that. For them if you don't show up they don't have money. I want my lesson providers to also have a steady income. 

The answer is as you say for the community to have some sort of community enrichment classes. Some providers do volunteer their time to do just that for the community but I think it's a bit unreasonable to ask them to do it for their job (the way by which they provide for their own families).

[kbutton]

1 hour ago, Faith-manor said:

I think that to paint those of us who spent hours and hours of time sitting around waiting for people to show up who don't, and think they shouldn't have to pay for our time as being nasty people who don't care for low income families is really unfair. My income was used to support our family, same as any other job. Why should I be treated that way? Who is entitled to treat someone else with so little respect?

I painted a written policy as sending a message, not that the teachers actually are this way. The policy is the first vehicle for communication that is often encountered by a parent before they pick up a phone and call a teacher. It’s basically “don’t even call us if you are ever going to be sick or go on vacation.”

I have nothing positive to say about sports culture—we refused to participate in that.

10 minutes ago, Clarita said:

Not every provider can do or schedule like that. For them if you don't show up they don't have money. I want my lesson providers to also have a steady income. 

It’s fine that some can’t, but I heard a strain somewhere in the thread about waiting lists and how people know they will lose their spot if they flake. The people I knew with waiting lists happened to be flexible. I found it ironic.

Of course I think that people in the arts should live on ramen and wear holey shoes. /s

In the end, the main music teacher we had was a friend, and we sent business her way. Sometimes we flexed for her.

 

[Dmmetler]

A majority of my students are under 10, have special needs, or both. Zoom lessons require a parent actively participating on the other side, and a LOT of set up on both sides so I we can see and hear each other.  And, the reason they come to me is that I can give their kids what they need-which requires me to be able to go on and off the piano, jump, dance, sing, pull additional resources, use props, etc. And because I do have a lot of young families and families with special needs kids, well, things come up. 

 

 

Here's what I'm thinking. Does this sound reasonable?

 

 

Your lesson day/time is reserved for you, and incorporates a significant amount of teacher preparation before class. In order to allow flexibility for student illness and other concerns, the following makeup policy is in place for ALL Singleton music classes.

1) Each private or small group student may do two makeup lessons per semester. Lessons missed due to illness or emergency must be requested as soon as possible and may not be approved if not requested before your scheduled lesson time.  Non-emergency rescheduling must be requested at least 72 hours before the scheduled lesson. Once a lesson is approved, you may sign up online for your desired time. No make up will be approved for a missed make up lessson, regardless of cause. Additional makeups may be approved on a case by case basis in situations such as severe illness. If your schedule no longer allows your regular lesson time, please contact the instructor to reschedule for the remainder of the semester. 

 

2) All makeups must be completed by the end of the semester. No credits will be carried over for missed sessions to the following semester without written approval from instructor and the center director. The semester end date will be extended if the center is closed or if the instructor has to cancel class for any reason. 

 

3) No student is to attend when ill. The instructor has chronic medical issues and minor conditions such as colds can become very serious. Students with respiratory symptoms, regardless of cause,  must wear a mask while in the lesson room (masks will be provided), and may not participate in woodwind components of music exploration classes. Students who attend who are symptomatic and do not mask when requested will be removed from the lesson room and be unable to attend, and no make up is permitted. If this occurs more than once, the student will be removed from the roll and a credit issued for remaining classes on your Singleton account. The student will not be able to register for music lessons or classes in subsequent semesters. 

 

 

 

 

[KungFuPanda]

I know a lot of teachers who use a punchcard system. Generally they sell a group of six lessons and you have 8 weeks to use them before the card expires. This does not work if it’s open ended. 
 

If a mother was honest and said “My kids aren’t sick but my husband is,” I’d work with her and extend her expiration date a week. Otherwise, be a hard ass. You know it’s the same people over and over who take advantage. 
 

Your policy can be no runny noses period. If it’s allergies, maybe require a note from the allergist or the parents can figure out how to treat it. 

[Clemsondana]

9 hours ago, maize said:

Charging the same whether kids show up or not is in my experience the rule not the exception for most private music studios-- there's a set monthly fee, paid in advance, that reserves your lesson time every week--meaning the teacher can't schedule another student in that slot and you are paying for the teacher's reserved time whether you use it or not. That's not a draconian policy, it's industry standard in professional music teacher circles. 

Makes perfect sense too. 

Our teacher is more casual - she charges by the lesson, so that if she plans to not have one the first week of May so that she can go to her kids field day at school or whatever then she can.  We aren't guaranteed a certain number of lessons each month.  At least 1-2 times each year she reschedules or cancels for something like this.  Some months have 4 lessons, others just 2. She takes off 2 weeks after school lets out each May, and 3 weeks at Christmas.  Her schedule aligns well with what local schools and sports are doing so I have no complaints.  On the first of each month, she tells us how many lessons that month will have and we pay per lesson.  In our case, on the rare occasion that we have a conflict, she applies the money as a credit to the next month even though her policy, which is harshly worded, says she doesn't.  I'd also be fine with something less flexible - we do other activities that are pay by the month.  But, then she'd lose her flexibility too.  I think its just reciprocity it for always being willing to switch days or times if we can help her out. She also teaches out of her home, so having a 30 min block of time isn't the waste that it is for someone renting space.  

Edited April 18 by Clemsondana

[Clemsondana]

4 hours ago, kbutton said:

It’s interesting to me how many of you are or have instructors with draconian policies who make exceptions.

We were late to start music lessons because I took all the posted draconian rules and gospel and figured we’d hate the experience. ETA: “as gospel”

We are exactly the people that need some flexibility but do not abuse it, but it would never occur to me to bother calling a studio that posted strict rules, so that colors my earlier feedback.

 

Our music teacher didn't start with a harsh policy - we got a new one after several years.  I read it and asked what had happened and she replied 'Y'all are fine'. Shed just had a bunch of flaky people all at once.  Neither she nor I would quibble over the cost of the single lesson that we cancel or reschedule each year, but for some families it was constant.  

[dirty ethel rackham]

On 4/17/2024 at 3:53 PM, QueenCat said:

Ugh... I was expecting a question about you trying to figure out where & when you do not wear cosmetics.

That was my first thought, too! 😄

[Dmmetler]

FWIW, 

 

I teach at parks and rec. The city provides the space, and city residents get a lower rate (out of city residents pay an additional charge, which goes directly to the city, not to me). Parents pay by the semester, although they can do a 3 installment plan through the office. It's a recreational program by design, and basically considered a supplement to the public schools, which has a pretty great music program in it's own right. They handle the money and some of the advertising (there is a catalog that goes out to every household twice a year, they have their own social media and website, and I'm who the school district refers anyone who wants piano to. I also teach music for the preschool program. 

 

So, I can't easily do punchcards or charge for single fill in lessons. 

 

It's been a mutually beneficial situation for the last 6 years-it's given me a transition away from homeschooling that I can build up gradually as I get more time. 

 

It's given them a very highly qualified teacher and, as word has gotten out, I pull a LOT of people in from outside the city limits-and it's become a big program. This semester I have 34 piano students and 19 homeschool group music students, plus the 6 preschool classes. 

Edited April 19 by Dmmetler

[KungFuPanda]

I’ve taught parks and rec before and there were no makeups. It made life easier and should not be expected for their rates. In fact, for my regular classes I don’t do make-ups unless I miss the class.  If a private student cancels within 24 hours I will reschedule them. If not, they just miss out. You might loose one or two people but most people get on board and it’s worth your peace of mind. 
 

It helps to make it clear that they are booking the time slot whether they show or not; kinda like concert tickets. Just explain that your schedule is tight and can’t absorb surprises. There is only one of you so they either have to pay a WHOLE lot more or just cope. 
 

ETA: if it’s been six years it might be time to give yourself a significant raise. You can’t necessarily control the rates, but you can reclaim some time and sanity. 

Edited April 19 by KungFuPanda

[Alice]

On 4/18/2024 at 2:01 PM, kbutton said:

It’s interesting to me how many of you are or have instructors with draconian policies who make exceptions.

 

 

 

Our first piano teacher it was a hard no exceptions policy. We paid by the month, regardless of how many lessons we made. If we told her in advance about something that we had she would try and schedule a make up but no promises. Reality for us was that it was usually easy as we were her only homeschooled students so we could come early. 

Ds has also taken drum and trumpet lessons. The drum lessons were similar in policy and difficult to reschedule a makeup. The trumpet lessons were pay each week, although the expectation was that you would go each week. We rarely missed except for illness so she didn't charge us when we did, I don't know if she had a different policy for people who missed more or for other reasons. 

Our current piano teacher is by Zoom, we've been with him a long time, pre-pandemic. When we started he came to our house and his policy was similar to the first one, pay by the month and if you miss he would try and schedule a makeup but no promises. He moved right at the same time as Covid. We first went virtual due to Covid and then it continued as he is now out of the area. Most of his students stayed with him. He tells me at the end of the month what I owe him and it's only for the lessons we made. We do attend most weeks and when we can't, I tell him well in advance (vacation or something like that). I have told him I'm fine with paying if we cancel late, which has happened one or two times, as I understand he has reserved that time for us. But he doesn't charge us. I think it's somewhat easier for him because he is at home and can transition to doing other work at that time fairly easily. Also, I think he knows it's rare for us and we've been with him for so long now that he is willing to be more flexible. 

23 hours ago, Dmmetler said:

A majority of my students are under 10, have special needs, or both. Zoom lessons require a parent actively participating on the other side, and a LOT of set up on both sides so I we can see and hear each other.  And, the reason they come to me is that I can give their kids what they need-which requires me to be able to go on and off the piano, jump, dance, sing, pull additional resources, use props, etc. And because I do have a lot of young families and families with special needs kids, well, things come up. 

 

 

Here's what I'm thinking. Does this sound reasonable?

 

 

Your lesson day/time is reserved for you, and incorporates a significant amount of teacher preparation before class. In order to allow flexibility for student illness and other concerns, the following makeup policy is in place for ALL Singleton music classes.

1) Each private or small group student may do two makeup lessons per semester. Lessons missed due to illness or emergency must be requested as soon as possible and may not be approved if not requested before your scheduled lesson time.  Non-emergency rescheduling must be requested at least 72 hours before the scheduled lesson. Once a lesson is approved, you may sign up online for your desired time. No make up will be approved for a missed make up lessson, regardless of cause. Additional makeups may be approved on a case by case basis in situations such as severe illness. If your schedule no longer allows your regular lesson time, please contact the instructor to reschedule for the remainder of the semester. 

 

2) All makeups must be completed by the end of the semester. No credits will be carried over for missed sessions to the following semester without written approval from instructor and the center director. The semester end date will be extended if the center is closed or if the instructor has to cancel class for any reason. 

 

3) No student is to attend when ill. The instructor has chronic medical issues and minor conditions such as colds can become very serious. Students with respiratory symptoms, regardless of cause,  must wear a mask while in the lesson room (masks will be provided), and may not participate in woodwind components of music exploration classes. Students who attend who are symptomatic and do not mask when requested will be removed from the lesson room and be unable to attend, and no make up is permitted. If this occurs more than once, the student will be removed from the roll and a credit issued for remaining classes on your Singleton account. The student will not be able to register for music lessons or classes in subsequent semesters. 

 

 

 

 

I think that sounds very reasonable. 

[katilac]

I can't imagine people asking for make-up lessons from a parks and rec program! That would most definitely not happen here. 

Others may not have this level of scheduling flexibility, but this is what I finally did, and it saved my sanity.

All my classes were a set length and paid in advance. All of my tutoring (after an initial session) was for a set length, paid in advance. By set length, I mean 8 classes were scheduled, or they paid for 8 tutoring sessions in advance versus a monthly thing.

For classes, all dates were given in advance, with big notations for when we were skipping a week for a holiday or such. I would advertise it as, say, a 10-week class at X amount (with X amount being what I wanted for a 12-week class) but with two make-up classes scheduled at the end for anyone who was sick or whatever. Same day, same time, so they could go ahead and pencil it in if they wanted to.  If we did something crazy fun like playing experimenting with dry ice or fake snow, I always planned to repeat it in a makeup session, lol. Near the end of the class, either a kid or a parent would inevitably ask if they could come to those sessions even if they hadn't missed, and I would ponder briefly and agree (and of course tell everyone). I didn't care, I was going to be there anyway. All of the actual make-ups were usually handled in class 11, so class 12 tended to be very fun and social in a 'last day of school' kind of way. 

Same for tutoring blocks: you bought 8 blocks, and then I would hold two at the same day and time at the end for makeups. You could do them after as well, but very much at my convenience. If they had something time-sensitive scheduled, like an ACT test, I would definitely try to accommodate that (and I priced those sessions at a level where I didn't mind doing that, lol). I did not go ahead and have those sessions for tutoring, though, I just held the two times open. 

The upside for the parents was that they were making one small commitment at a time, and they could decide at the end of their block if they wanted to buy another block right then, or take a break, or never see me again. 

On 4/17/2024 at 3:53 PM, QueenCat said:

Ugh... I was expecting a question about you trying to figure out where & when you do not wear cosmetics.

I swear, my brain went, what?? Your daughter is in college, she can make her own decisions about makeup 😅

On 4/17/2024 at 3:33 PM, regentrude said:

If they are sick, they know before the lesson. For a makeup, they must notify you ahead of time, perhaps the morning of. No shows without prior notice don't get makeups.

Neither of your kids gave you the great experience of being fine one minute, and puking as they walked out of the door the next minute? Lucky, lol. 

My kids definitely had sicknesses come on fast, but it's just something that happens. Maybe we'd still get a make-up, maybe not. It's not something that happens often enough to constantly be missing things (if it does, that kid needs a doctor). 

On 4/18/2024 at 12:29 PM, prairiewindmomma said:

Not having strict boundaries = a notable subsection of the populace will not respect you or your time. 

Sadly true, and many of them are shameless.

On 4/18/2024 at 1:01 PM, kbutton said:

It’s interesting to me how many of you are or have instructors with draconian policies who make exceptions.

We were late to start music lessons because I took all the posted draconian rules and gospel and figured we’d hate the experience. ETA: “as gospel”

We are exactly the people that need some flexibility but do not abuse it, but it would never occur to me to bother calling a studio that posted strict rules, so that colors my earlier feedback.

Eventually we found the right teacher, but it was via friendship. My kids NEEDED music lessons but rigid policies wouldn’t have worked.

 It's because that's what works. Some places absolutely are that strict. And you have to remember that the people offering the classes and lessons also have lots of stuff come up in life, and constant make-ups can really complicate things. 

Friendships are a great way to find or establish more flexible or unusual arrangements. Teachers don't have a sorting hat that puts the strangers who need some flexibility but won't abuse it into a special category so they can recognize them, and the sad fact is that a whole lot of people are willing to lie and take advantage.