Choosing a mattress size for 10 year old?

[PeterPan]

Ds is 10 and sleeping on a hand-me-down latex mattress that is too firm (padding packed down, stiff) and would like a replacement. What I can't decide is the SIZE. He's at the 75th percentile for height and anticipated to be ~5'10" full grown. He's currently 4'8" (well 4' 8 3/4" , haha) and his sleeping style is curled. 

Does sleeping style change with age? He's always slept curled like this. I'm a total back sleeper, so for me a bed needs length. But with his curled style, he literally only uses about half the length of a twin right now. When we travel, he sleeps the same way on a hotel full/queen, enjoying the width but not using the length. My dh thinks sleeping style can change as kids age and that we should buy a mattress that will last for length and go twin XL. We got my dd a twin XL around this age and she LOVED it. I thought about bringing that over to his room, but I think it might be a bit worn at this point. The tag on it says 2012.

That brings up my next question. How long do mattresses last for kids? Assuming we keep it dry (no wetting, he has autism and uses pads), would it be normal for it to last 6 years? 8? 10? He's 10 and with his fall birthday and a probable grade reassignment coming, he's probably going to be home till at least 19, maybe close to 20. Would I get 10 years out of this mattress or more like 6-8? He's not heavy fwiw. So far he's typically 75th for height and 50th for weight, pretty consistently. 

Other factors? We have a small dog and he wants the dog to fit in bed with him better. The dog likes to have his own space and leaves as soon as he can because he has no space on ds' twin. Ds would like a bigger dog, which we don't have yet. I would see that definitely happen more around 14-16, when ds is mature enough to go to training. (Yeah, send my ds to dog training to improve his compliance! Haha) I'd love to make a move on that earlier, and it's possible we would. Ds REALLY WANTS a bigger dog, more stuffed animals, things like that in bed with him for sensory. Sleep and autism are kinda crunchy anyway. 

So in my mind, I was thinking a full or a full XL made sense. I don't think a queen is good in his room. It would just eat the space. I could rearrange the room and pull dd's twin XL in temporarily and see how it feels. Pain in the butt, but better than a mistake on buying a mattress.

Option 1: Buy a full. has room for dog and a curled ds, is less money than a full XL, will probably last till 18 for height and quality. I'd have to buy bedding, as I have almost nothing for a full. Or put queen sheets on and have them wiggle in every direction.

Option 2: Buy a twin XL. 

Option 3: Bring in dd's twin XL (used 5 years and she's a BIG GIRL, like 180 pounds, 5'9", and she was adult size for most of those years, it's broken in as she puts it) and replace it with a queen in her room. How many more years would that twin XL have? He doesn't use the length at all and it doesn't improve his width and it may be sagging a bit, need to check.

Option 4: Buy a full XL. This would be your one bed for 10 years solution. There are 2 configurations where a full XL works in his room, but it can work. A full XL is slightly custom (upcharge $80 from full size) but it gives you the length of a queen. He wouldn't use that length now, but he would probably with time, assuming a mattress like that lasts 8-10 years. Advantage is I have lots of queen size sheets already that I could use on it.

Option 5: Buy a box spring and topper. My dh thought this was crazy, but I was floating all ideas. My thought there was allowing for the wetting and assuming we'd replace it with something bigger in a year or two. But again, if a mattress will last 8-10, what's the point?

The wetting we deal with by having 4 layers on the bed at all times, so really the damage issue is fine. Dh's thought was that as the bed gets bigger the bed pads to keep it protected would get bigger. It's true on a queen it's really hard and takes a lot of padding. I use a square size that spans a twin (38X38ish) most of the time and I have a larger size (38X50 maybe?) that I use under his sheets before a full mattress barrier and a plastic barrier. So I would think on a full size I'd need to use a 38X50-something to span the width of it. Oh duh, that's probably what that thing was sized for. It does fit in my washer and wash fine, yes. It's just bigger. 

I don't know, do you see anything there? Any good advice?

[eagleynne]

Well, I'm 5' 10" and I sleep just fine in a regular length full size bed. Assuming he isn't going to be sharing with anyone/thing that is also the size of an adult human I shouldn't think you'd need an XL full bed. If it were me I'd probably go with a regular full size and get some new bedding, and maybe a waterproof fitted mattress cover for peace of mind. With a full he should have room for himself (curled or straight) and a largish furry friend. Most mattresses I've seen that were subjected to normal wear lasted 6-10 years. Just don't get a really cheap one. And don't get a euro top, you can't flip them and as soon as the pillow top gets mashed down they're hard and lumpy.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

I’d get a standard full size mattress, and a waterproof mattress pad. We happen to like Zinus, we ordered from amazon. We started with one and have been slowly replacing all our mattresses with these styles. 

 

[Pawz4me]

10 minutes ago, PinkyandtheBrains. said:

I’d get a standard full size mattress, and a waterproof mattress pad. We happen to like Zinus, we ordered from amazon. We started with one and have been slowly replacing all our mattresses with these styles. 

 

I bought Zinus mattresses for our adult sons this summer and so far both have been VERY happy with them. I think a standard full size makes the most sense.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

4 minutes ago, Pawz4me said:

I bought Zinus mattresses for our adult sons this summer and so far both have been VERY happy with them. I think a standard full size makes the most sense.

 

Our first one is about 3 years old, and still in excellent condition.  We rotate and flip often, just to make sure there is even wear.

We use waterproof washable mattress pads on all of them. I don’t remember the brand but I ordered them online as well. They aren’t plasticy, no crinkle noise like some waterproof options.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Oh and we have two people at around 5’10 sleeping on standard full size with no issue.

[PeterPan]

15 minutes ago, Pawz4me said:

I bought Zinus mattresses for our adult sons this summer and so far both have been VERY happy with them. I think a standard full size makes the most sense.

Are the Zinus mattresses y'all are talking about the iCoil? On amazon it says they're extra-firm. Is that what you ordered? Or you found a firm? Or you're using their foam, not the coil?

[ktgrok]

Standard full size. My 6ft tall DS has never had an XL bed, and my 6'2 ex husband never had an XL bed. A regular length is fine and sheets are easy to buy at walmart or whatever. 

The full size will leave room for a dog. 

[SKL]

I think that since your daughter is 5'9, she may as well keep her twin XL and so I'd buy son a twin XL.  I would do that rather than a queen, because it would leave more room free in the bedroom for other things.

I would expect a mattress to last as long as the kid wants to use it.  My last one I bought used and slept on it for about 25 years.  My kids are still using the ones I bought them 7 years ago and I have no plans to ever replace them.  (They can buy wider ones when they leave and marry.)

[Selkie]

We're a tall family (I'm the shorty at 5'10) and the only one of us who needs an XL bed is my ds20, who is 6'5.

[Pawz4me]

11 minutes ago, PeterPan said:

Are the Zinus mattresses y'all are talking about the iCoil? On amazon it says they're extra-firm. Is that what you ordered? Or you found a firm? Or you're using their foam, not the coil?

This is the one we bought (foam). I wanted to gift each of them a new mattress but didn't want to spend a ton because both will almost certainly be moving around a lot in the next few years and there's no telling how the mattresses will get moved and shoved and stored. I didn't want to invest $$$$ in a mattress and box spring only to have them ruined being shoved into a dirty UHaul. Plus I figured it would be easier to move one foam mattress than a mattress and a box spring. I was worried the mattresses would be cheap/flimsy, but they've far exceeded my expectations and the boys rave about them.

Edited November 27, 2018 by Pawz4me

[Myra]

I wish I had gone with full size mattresses all along - just skip the twinsized all together.  This would have allowed more snuggling and room for read alouds .... and room to spread out as they hit the teen years.

[Pen]

Full if you have room for it .  For width for dog ,  ds has twin and there’s not enough dog room. 

[Arcadia]

DS12 curls and straighten throughout the night so his legs (mid-calf to feet) either dangles or lands on the bedroom carpet as his twin mattress is on the floor. So I would go for a XL if I am buying him a replacement. He is about 5’7” after one round of growth spurt and is slowing reaching my husband’s height of 5’10”.

DS13 is around 140lbs and his spring mattress needs to be replaced soon. He turns often while sleeping though and he reads in bed. DS13 curls up because he doesn’t like his feet dangling so he would straighten, feels his feet unsupported and curl up again. He naps fully stretched diagonally on our queen size bed. 

[moonflower]

We stayed in a VRBO this summer that had beds so comfortable I took off the sheets and mattress cover so I could find out the name brand of the mattress.  It was a Zinus, this exact one: (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00Q7EPPDA/ref=twister_B07792YVXM?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&pldnSite=1)

 

I measured.

[Arctic Bunny]

My DH is over 6’ and had a regular twin bed until he was 20. He managed just fine.

[sassenach]

We got a full for my son. He's 6'2" now and appreciates the room. My 6'4" brother slept in a twin until he was an adult, so it can be done, but if you have the option of sizing up now, why not?

 

[Storygirl]

I think I'm the only one to say this so far, but I would move the XL twin that you have over for your son and buy a queen for your daughter's room. It sounds like she doesn't like her mattress any more any way, so it might be nice for her to have a better one when she comes home to visit from college.

Because of the wetting, I'd go ahead and use a mattress that you don't have to invest money in, and then in a couple of years (hopefully!!) when everything is staying dry, buy whatever you think is best at that point.

I personally let my son outgrow his nighttime wetting while keeping him on a very old mattress.

[Storygirl]

Oh, and I very rarely replace mattresses. Almost never. I don't plan to replace my kids' mattresses, unless they become uncomfortable, even though some of them are probably going on 15 years old. So one that was purchased in 2012 sounds newish to me!!

Some people probably think it's gross to keep mattresses that long, but I hate to get rid of things that are still useful.

[prairiewindmomma]

14 minutes ago, Storygirl said:

I think I'm the only one to say this so far, but I would move the XL twin that you have over for your son and buy a queen for your daughter's room. It sounds like she doesn't like her mattress any more any way, so it might be nice for her to have a better one when she comes home to visit from college.

Because of the wetting, I'd go ahead and use a mattress that you don't have to invest money in, and then in a couple of years (hopefully!!) when everything is staying dry, buy whatever you think is best at that point.

I personally let my son outgrow his nighttime wetting while keeping him on a very old mattress.

I would do this also. Odds are she will marry in the next decade; having a queen already on hand would be convenient for her or any guests you have at the house.

I don't entirely buy in to the 7 years = new mattress theory that manufacturer's try to sell us. I've had mattresses wear out at the 5 year mark; I've had others that were fine at the 15 year mark. It's all dependent on the quality and design of the mattress, how often it's rotated, and how much destruction has been rained down upon it during its use.

[Condessa]

Well this has been educational.  I never knew that mattresses supposedly need to be replaced after 7 years, or that people routinely use full-sized mattresses for use by a single person.  I used a twin until I was married (at home, in the dorms, and in my college apartment).  Then we used a full-size mattress for the first five years of our marriage.  

[mumto2]

We bought a full size standard length for my son at about that age partly to reduce the chances of falling out of bed because he was a super active sleeper and rolled onto the floor constantly.  When we took the mattress off the floor we bought a larger matress in hopes that we could keep him on the bed.  It worked pretty well.  Now he is 6’4” and glad we bought it because of his length.  He doesn’t fall out of bed any longer. 😉

I think both options work well.....upgrade dd to a queen and give him her twin xl for a couple years to see how it works out is a perfectly acceptable plan.  If you want him to have the dog and more stuffed friends in bed then get the full.  I think this is a situation where the decision is yours.

[ktgrok]

I don't see the point of giving him the older, less comfortable mattress to sleep on every night while putting a brand new queen mattress ( more expensive than a full) in her room, for no one to sleep on except when she visits. Buy a full (cheaper) and give it to the person who actually lives there full time. 

[prairiewindmomma]

Is it less comfortable? We only know that it has been used for five years. I know dd prefers my five year old mattress to her two year old mattress. 

What does your Ds think of it?

[PeterPan]

1 hour ago, mumto2 said:

I think both options work well.....upgrade dd to a queen and give him her twin xl for a couple years to see how it works out is a perfectly acceptable plan.  If you want him to have the dog and more stuffed friends in bed then get the full.  I think this is a situation where the decision is yours.

Yup, that's what I finally decided, that it was just a bed, a decision, and that I could choose something and if it was wrong go oh well. We went with the full and he LOVES it. The dog fits so nicely with him and it doesn't cram his room. 

6 hours ago, Storygirl said:

I think I'm the only one to say this so far, but I would move the XL twin that you have over for your son and buy a queen for your daughter's room. It sounds like she doesn't like her mattress any more any way, so it might be nice for her to have a better one when she comes home to visit from college.

Because of the wetting, I'd go ahead and use a mattress that you don't have to invest money in, and then in a couple of years (hopefully!!) when everything is staying dry, buy whatever you think is best at that point.

I personally let my son outgrow his nighttime wetting while keeping him on a very old mattress.

Hehe, glad I didn't read this before I told dh what the Hive had said! LOL I told him that 20 women had written me and that they had ALL said they would buy the full, that they ALL put their ds on full, hehehehe. He bowed to the wisdom of the women and shut up.

Ok, you can think this is crazy, but my ds has already been on an old bed. The mattress he was sleeping on was my dd's when she was 2 and sleeping on a trundle beside us. So it's already like 17 years old. It's holding up, not saggy or anything, but it's just not comfortable. And I sort of wanted to get in his head and give him the feeling of something really different, like civilization and pleasure and comfort. Remember, his bedding was soaked every night for years, even with night pants. All he got was a blanket and fitted sheet, because I had to wash the bedding every single day. So now his bed (so long as he wears night pants) is dry, and I thought it would be a nice change for him to have sheets and a blanket and a comforter and actually feel kind of normal instead of like some wanderer sleeping on the concrete with a tarp. I think that's really how he felt, kind of punished. And he was SO happy with his new bedding. And I hadn't meant for it to be like a punishment. When he was little, it made sense just to use a fitted sheet and a blanket. But now it just didn't. He really needed some more creature comforts and normalcy. 

1 hour ago, Ktgrok said:

I don't see the point of giving him the older, less comfortable mattress to sleep on every night while putting a brand new queen mattress ( more expensive than a full) in her room, for no one to sleep on except when she visits. Buy a full (cheaper) and give it to the person who actually lives there full time. 

Yup. That's what I did. So ds got his full, the broken in twin is still in dd's room. If anyone else were to need that room (I'm 42, so the window on that is quickly closing), then I have it. I want to put a queen in there, but I think I'll wait till it becomes very obvious there won't be another person needing that room. And then I have the normal debates, like bed vs. sleeper sofa, lol. 

Well thanks ladies, I very, very, very much appreciate it! When he heard the score here dh totally bowed to the wisdom of the women. Ds loves his new full bed. 

[KidsHappen]

I would buy him a full but you also need to take into consideration that he is a side sleeper. Side sleepers need softer, less firm mattress. Firm mattresses cause painful pressure points at the hips and shoulders for side sleepers. You can find reviews for the best mattresses for side sleepers on youtube. You could also look for best bargain mattresses for side sleepers if price is a concern. Most reasonably priced foam mattresses last five or six years. Even high quality mattresses are supposed to be replaced every eight years due to dust, mites, dander and such. If you bought you dd a mattress in 2012 it is really reaching the end of it's useful life. I would also consider replacing it with a Linus if you can afford it so that she has a comfy mattress until she leaves home and then it will last for quiet awhile for her to sleep in when she comes home to visit.

[PeterPan]

5 minutes ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Is it less comfortable? We only know that it has been used for five years. I know dd prefers my five year old mattress to her two year old mattress. 

What does your Ds think of it?

Ok, this is my personal assessment... I went in and checked it because I really thought it was an economical option just to wait till after the holiday and move it over. The area where her core lay is slightly depressed, enough that I think it's not ideal to put a younger, lighter growing body there. The mattress man years ago had emphasized the importance of proper support for a growing body. He said adults like soft beds but kids actually need them firm and supportive because they're growing. 

So I figured while broken in and curving with her was appropriate at 19, that maybe for a 10 yo the new level of support would be better. And the twin XL wouldn't give him room for the dog, which was actually REALLY important to him. So we'd be messing up my dd's ability to have a bed she's used to when she comes home and not really resolving ds' major request for more room for the dog. And that might sound silly, but this is a boy who fights sleep big time. If a bigger bed and a dog in the bed will get him IN BED, it's worth the money.

[PeterPan]

3 minutes ago, KidsHappen said:

I would buy him a full but you also need to take into consideration that he is a side sleeper. Side sleepers need softer, less firm mattress. Firm mattresses cause painful pressure points at the hips and shoulders for side sleepers. You can find reviews for the best mattresses for side sleepers on youtube. You could also look for best bargain mattresses for side sleepers if price is a concern. Most reasonably priced foam mattresses last five or six years. Even high quality mattresses are supposed to be replaced every eight years due to dust, mites, dander and such. If you bought you dd a mattress in 2012 it is really reaching the end of it's useful life. I would also consider replacing it with a Linus if you can afford it so that she has a comfy mattress until she leaves home and then it will last for quiet awhile for her to sleep in when she comes home to visit.

Ooo, that's interesting information! I sleep flat on my back, utterly flat, except when I'm pregnant (and then it's very disruptive, mercy). So you're right, I'm not very intuitive on what side sleepers need. My dh is a side sleeper, and you're right his side looks a FRIGHT. I'm like don't you DARE rotate that mattress my way, lol. We have a king and I think when we replace it we need to go with the two pieces for the mattress so he can have his his own way and replace it easily. The gap would be annoying, but it would just make more sense.

And yeah, putting something nicer into dd's room is now on the list. I just sorta blew my wad on this one, lol. The mail order ones are definitely interesting though.

[Terabith]

I'm a side sleeper, but I really like a VERY firm mattress.  My very favorite bed is the guest bed at my mother in law's.  It's a twin and they don't make it anymore, but I find it SOOOO comfy and sleep amazingly on it, but it is much firmer than most.  But I actually loved our mattress on the floor for ten years thing.  

[PeterPan]

4 hours ago, Terabith said:

I'm a side sleeper, but I really like a VERY firm mattress.  My very favorite bed is the guest bed at my mother in law's.  It's a twin and they don't make it anymore, but I find it SOOOO comfy and sleep amazingly on it, but it is much firmer than most.  But I actually loved our mattress on the floor for ten years thing.  

Oh yeah, I can sleep on the floor, on the wood deck when I lay out, etc. I seem to have the constitution for it, lol.

[Terabith]

1 hour ago, PeterPan said:

Oh yeah, I can sleep on the floor, on the wood deck when I lay out, etc. I seem to have the constitution for it, lol.

Yeah, I have no problem sleeping on carpeted floors at all.  I find straight up hardwood floors a bit hard though.  

[J-rap]

I'd go for the standard full as well.  Those can also evolve into a guest bed for a young couple, if necessary.  We have small rooms in our house and can really only fit a queen size mattress in the master room (our room).  Our ds's full sized bed has now worked for my dd and her dh and my ds and his dw when they visit.  It's not ideal (a queen would be better!), but it works.