MedicMom Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Where do you find friends? We won't be doing a co-op. We are homeschooling specifically because DS7 cannot handle a classroom situation. However, he's become very social, and is worried about making friends this year. There are no park days. Everyone in our area is involved in a co-op and only co-op. I will be working most evenings, and he has no interest in sports/martial arts/clubs. There aren't many here anyway. He does like lego club at the library, but it's evening and once a month. His dad or grandma will likely take him, but I need more than once a Month. His sensory issues make him hate socks, which eliminates a lot of the play places in the area. Going back to school is not an option this year. I'm getting worried, to be honest. I was homeschooled all my life, but there were no co-ops back then. There were park days, gym classes, and homeschool support group get togethers...it was just a different world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Cub Scouts? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrapbookbuzz Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 I have no insight. We don't do co-ops right now, either, but only because we're involved with theater and taekwondo. I pray you find something that works for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Can you start a drop in park day or sports day? Do any co-ops allow you to do just one class. That, and lunch, might be enough. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Are you sure the co-ops are only co-ops and not also support groups? Our support group offers a lot of things, and only part of the group does the co-op. Lots of people don't attend co-op but still do field trips and park days and such. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 I actually had to start a park day. But that worked great. Don't be afraid to try and get something going on your local homeschool groups and boards. I personally think co-ops are kind of a waste for younger kids in many cases. One day a week isn't enough time to buid a routine and teachers don't have classroom management skills. It's like herding cats. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HomeAgain Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 We are not doing a co-op. They just won't work for us right now. We have found other options: -single classes -sports -scouts -MOPS has a MomsNext program in some areas for mothers of older children. Ours had a homeschool room for kids during the meeting.-mom support groups. I plan on hosting Moms' Night In once a month here this year and let the kids play while we talk. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Most of the friends of my kids are neighbors or from church. We also randomly met a family at the library a few years ago and have become good friends with them. I will say only my oldest (9) has a strong need/desire for close friends. My younger two kids have fun with whoever they are around at the time but don't seem to need that one best friend. It does take effort on my part to get the kids together with their friends. As far as activities, we have tried several and my kids have fun while there but they haven't made any actual friends except when I made the effort. I took the time to get the phone number and then set up a time to get together. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyroo Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 One of the main reasons we are YMCA members is for the KidZone. We tend to go in the after-school hours (between nap/rest time and dinner for us) so that all of my kids can play with peers. I can drop them all off and swim, workout, or just read in the quiet chapel. Or I can drop off a couple of the kids and take some of them swimming with me. My kids aren't really developing life-long friendships there, but they are interacting with kids their ages and getting to know some of the same kids week to week. Wendy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 We don't do coops. Instead I run a bowling league for us, family martial arts and other activities. Those keep us busy enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicMom Posted August 18, 2017 Author Share Posted August 18, 2017 No YMCA/YWCA. All but one co-op is Classical Conversations. The other co-op is faith based and I can't sign their statement of faith. CC won't allow you to just take one class. His sensory issues are the main problem here, I think, besides the rural nature of where we live. He hates noise, hates bright sun and sports are a double hate(noise, chaos, sun is too bright...) Aaagh. Why does it have to be so hard???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinivanMom Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Church, scouts, musical ensembles, sports, and dance. For sports and dance, it has required long-term commitment for those friendships to grow (staying in the same league or dance school for years as the kids grow up). Just a single season or class hasn't been enough to build relationships. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 No YMCA/YWCA. All but one co-op is Classical Conversations. The other co-op is faith based and I can't sign their statement of faith. CC won't allow you to just take one class. His sensory issues are the main problem here, I think, besides the rural nature of where we live. He hates noise, hates bright sun and sports are a double hate(noise, chaos, sun is too bright...) Aaagh. Why does it have to be so hard???? How close are you to a library or other place you could use a room? Maybe start a "club" in one of his interests. Maybe a lego club 2x a month where kids bring their creations to show off and admire other creations. Have everyone bring their own legos to build while there. You could even make a theme each meeting of build something that represents that theme. Just a suggestion- If you start one, I highly recommend having each family sign a contract on behavior and rules. I have been burned one too many times with parents who just wanted a baby sitter or just not want to parent. This piece of paper save sanity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeachyDoodle Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 We have struggled with this too, although we aren't dealing with any sensory issues. But we are rural, at least enough that there's no neighborhood kids to play with. We also, until recently, did not have a church, and that seems to be where everyone around here (kids and adults) make friends. We haven't been at the new church long enough to forge any relationships, but it's 30 minutes away anyhow. We have tried to focus on helping our kids build one-on-one friendships with just one or two kids. Neither of ours is terribly social, and they don't particularly care for large groups or loud environments. And IME it has been hard for them to form relationships with other kids as part of classes or teams. So it has worked well for us to seek out a family with a child or children close in age/gender/interests to our own and invite them over to visit or to do an activity with us. Mind you, this is a lot of extra work for ME, and I am very introverted and generally uncomfortable doing it. But it has been worth it to see dd12 especially start to develop close friendships. And dh and I have gotten at least one pair of great couple friends out of it as well. It's a process but it's worked better than anything else for us. We still do activities -- variously: golf team, Girl Scouts, Cub Scouts, group violin lessons, YMCA Kid's Club and kid's fitness classes -- which gets them some social interaction. But if those environments are uncomfortable for your child (and they are uncomfortable for mine, especially ds), it might be better to look for one-on-one opportunities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Random Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 (edited) We don't have YMCA, either. We've found friends outside of homeschool-type activities. If the right opportunity doesn't exist for your son right now, can you create it? Here are some activities in my area, that might spark an idea for you: -mountain biking -music lessons -invite people over for board games or any other activity your son likes to do -Scouting -Lego clubs-could be something as simple as issuing a Lego Challenge for everyone to complete -Drama -Hiking (you could just invite everyone to meet at a trailhead at a specified date/time) We used to live in a very rural setting and had to drive an hour each way for things like guitar lessons. Edited August 18, 2017 by Random Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 When my ds was in first and I wasn't joining a co-op for a variety of reasons, I did a science class out of my house. I posted on a local homeschool listserv (that ds is now 22 so this was a while ago). 2 boys were interested. I started with just doing science experiments once a week. The boys would do experiements with me for 30-45 minutes and then play for another hour. This was low key and worked great for my quirky ds. The boys who came had their own quirks too. One of the moms is still my good friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Extra curricular stuff mostly (drama, dance, choir, etc.). If you are so inclined, why not start your own park day? I bet others would join you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Governess Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Besides legos, what does he enjoy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 4H Cloverbud group might be an option. They usually meet once or twice a month with fun, low key activities and projects. Ask the library if they have any reading clubs for children in his age range. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyGF Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Cub Scouts? My son's Scout troop has a kid who has sensory issues. His parent usually stays with him and he wears hearing protection the entire time, but it seems to be working for him. Emily Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicMom Posted August 18, 2017 Author Share Posted August 18, 2017 Besides legos, what does he enjoy? Minecraft and science experiments. There's a lovely sciencenter 40 minutes away, but they don't have anything for homeschoolers. I'm thinking homeschool activities because they generally meet during the day, which is easier for us with my work schedule. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idnib Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 (edited) What about neighbors? My kids' closest friends are neighbors whose kids go to the local public school. Can you do a Lego thing at your home for homeschoolers every month or so? Edited August 18, 2017 by idnib Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 Church, neighborhood, and afterschool activities that invited a mix of homeschoolers and regular schoolers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MistyMountain Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 4H Swimming Scouts start your own First Lego League Choir Rocket club Drama Start a park day or a gym day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loowit Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 We did a co-op for a couple years when my kids were younger and they never really made any friends at it. The cost and time it took up led me to quit. DD is in a homeschool art school one day a week. She has made friends there, but none that she really hangs out with outside of school/study sessions. We tried a lot of different things, some they found friends and others they didn't. Soccer was not really helpful in making friends, but they did get physical activity. Dance for DD, she made a few friends, but since most of the time they are in class, not forming social bonds, it was also not a big way to make friends. Middle kid was on a Lego robotics team for a few years, but never made many friends there either. Scouting and church have been much better social outlets. These activities are more oriented to provided social interactions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 I agree you may have to do something yourself. If he is protective of his Lego maybe science would be better. The paper recycling from the free Mr Q life science was fun and low cost for a trial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheres Toto Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 4H Cloverbud group might be an option. They usually meet once or twice a month with fun, low key activities and projects. Ask the library if they have any reading clubs for children in his age range. I agree. I started a 4-H Club when I was looking for activities for my kids. In particular my Aspie, SPD, very quirky son. I felt better having him in an activity that I ran because instructors usually either love him and think he's hilarious, or just can NOT deal with him at all. It makes us very particular about what we sign him up for, even though he's much better now that he's turning 12. My first club was a Cloverbud club where we explored different things each month. If you go to the link in my signature and hit the 4-H Cloverbud tag you can see some of what we did. It was great for younger kids, not overly strenuous. We met twice a month - one meeting held at our library and one field trip. Now Dh and I run a 4-H STEM club. The kids also do TKD at a dojo known for being good with "quirky" kids, and yoga at the Y. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted August 18, 2017 Share Posted August 18, 2017 We have never joined a co-op. My kids make friends at church and swim team as well as at neighborhood events. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted August 19, 2017 Share Posted August 19, 2017 Minecraft and science experiments. There's a lovely sciencenter 40 minutes away, but they don't have anything for homeschoolers. I'm thinking homeschool activities because they generally meet during the day, which is easier for us with my work schedule. Could you organise some kind of Minecraft hour get together? I've seen it done in schools, I don't know how hard it would be to set up at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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