Life Insurance for YOU.

[BlsdMama]

So many of us have life insurance on working spouses but please consider life insurance on you.

 

This is a pretty dark and dreary post, but really consider it.

 

This medical thing is on a downhill slide and we have always carried a small policy on me through DH's work.  (We maxed out the policy on him through his work.)  We meant to increase it and last year around open enrollment, we called to see what the cost would be through USAA and it was *very* reasonable because I am young and healthy.  So we took out an additional policy because if anything ever happened, he will have to continue to work, will still have small children, etc., etc., etc.

I'm glad we did.  Even if all of this now medical stuff comes to something less serious, it is a big relief right now. 

I would urge you, if you're young and healthy, go grab a policy.  This health thing changes at the drop of a hat. At the time we did it, we had no idea what was in store for this year or the possibilities of being truly ill.

 

I would also urge you to look at something called  an accelerated benefit rider.  I had never heard of such a thing until I read about it last week and it is really a rider to consider.  This allows you to withdraw a portion to help with expenses if you are terminally ill.

I know DH also has a long term disability policy just in case. I would assume SAHM are not eligible for such a thing.  If anyone knows, speak now. :)

 

[Guest]

Good job. I totally agree. We did this umpteen (more than 30 years ago) and we have borrowed against the policy at necessity. And if we spend every last dime we have, our son will have an inheritance. And I don't have to fret about that.

 

And in the meantime it was a help to know we could have paid off the house and not had to have enormous changes to our lives. And seeing my friends who have lost spouses in their 40s and 50s -- omgoodness -- not having to freak out and change your whole life is an enormous benefit when your world has been shattered.

[Carol in Cal.]

OP, I missed the backstory but it sounds serious.  I will be praying for you.

[Joules]

[ETA: This is heartfelt and important so I want to leave it for a while, but probably TMI.  Please don't quote the personal details]

Yes, please, please listen to Kelly.  If you can't afford all of the options, just go for as much 30-year term as you can get.  I was already having some health problems when we bought mine when ds was a baby, so it was more expensive.  We decided on 20 year term (I've got 1 1/2 years left).  This year with the autoimmune attacking the heart and lungs, I'm feeling like a washing machine that is going to expire right after the warranty runs out, so I wish I'd gotten 30.  It would be nice to know dh could pay off the house and ds could finish through grad school without money worries, particularly since I haven't been able to work the past few years like we thought.

 

You can't imagine how much it will cost for your spouse to replace everything you do for free.  Even if your life insurance only covers a year of that, it gives a spouse a chance to catch their bearings and maybe take some time off with the kids to help with the kids.  For most people, it's torture to lose a spouse and have to go back to work in a couple of weeks, because you need the money.  I've just seen it happen to too many families in the past 10 years.

 

Also, to add, I'm considering getting ds a 30 year term policy next time we do financial stuff.  Though my health problems mostly seem to be through the female line, I can see how devastating it might be for a young man to not be able to get insurance for his family, if he suddenly develops a long term illness.

Edited March 6, 2017 by Joules

[Guest]

Yeah, we have one. It isn't massive but it would more than suffice on the monetary side for him if I die. Insurance is a tool for managing financial risk and mom dying is a financial risk of some magnitude, just like dad dying. I urge people to grab policies when they're young and healthy as well.

[Ottakee]

We actually have more on me than On dh. We maxed out his work policies but also have private ones since jobs can change so often now.

[Penguin]

I have one that I have been paying on since the 1980s. It isn't the greatest, because the premium increases as I age but it isn't over-the-top expensive either. On the upside, it never expires.

 

I'n debating letting it go after our youngest graduates high school (2019), and replacing it with a long term care policy.

 

I am in my 50s and have been witnessing peers panic over the cost of care for their parents. My mom took out her long term care policy in her 50s, and I am grateful.

[madteaparty]

Great thread.

I would love to hear from anyone that has bought a private (I.e non employer) long term disability insurance and ballpark what they are paying for it. Last I checked, it was stupid expensive and I decided to go back to work extremely part time by way of "insurance".

[FaithManor]

I agree wholeheartedly. I had a pregnancy that was the kind that isn't particularly survivable. My husband would have had three other small children to care for, and that meant needing to pay for private schools because the local ones just are so poor. Additionally, due to the hours he works, probably after school care, a housekeeper, and potentially even a nanny. That's very expensive. I had a friend once say her husband would be okay because they had a $10,000 policy through their bank on her. I nearly fell over. $10,000 wouldn't pay for day care for three kids for one year.

 

We keep a quarter million on me through his work. Of course I came through and now we have only one child left, a current junior so only two semesters and what is left of this one before I am done with the intensive mothering thing. But at least it was there to help him if something had happened.

[mom2scouts]

Yes, good advice! Although my husband has been the working spouse since we started having our kids a billion years ago, he realized that I should have at least a small life insurance policy. 

[SKL]

I took one out (separate from work) long before I had kids, to cover my share of the house mortgage and help my parents should I die.  After the house was paid off, I just kept paying it.  It's like $40/month and quite worth it for the peace of mind.  The premium adjusts upward every 5 years or so, but it's based on age, not medical condition.

Edited March 6, 2017 by SKL

[SKL]

I would also suggest that working spouses take out insurance separate from work, as the work-funded insurance can go poof with little warning.

[BlsdMama]

I would also suggest that working spouses take out insurance separate from work, as the work-funded insurance can go poof with little warning.

 

Yes, I wish we had done this.  DH is trying to lose some weight now so that we can.  He has almost a million through work as a perk but we looked at adding through USAA and his is expensive because of weight and blood pressure.  I wish we had just gone out at 30 and bought 30 year term. 

 

 

[mommyoffive]

Good job. I totally agree. We did this umpteen (more than 30 years ago) and we have borrowed against the policy at necessity. And if we spend every last dime we have, our son will have an inheritance. And I don't have to fret about that.

 

And in the meantime it was a help to know we could have paid off the house and not had to have enormous changes to our lives. And seeing my friends who have lost spouses in their 40s and 50s -- omgoodness -- not having to freak out and change your whole life is an enormous benefit when your world has been shattered.

 

 

Do you have term or whole life?

[mommyoffive]

I read this article lately.

 

https://www.wsj.com/articles/the-latest-gamble-in-life-insurance-sell-it-online-1484217026

 

 

 

 

 

[mommyoffive]

So SAHMs lets chat

 

 

How much insurance policy do you have? 

 

How did you come up with the number? 

 

How many years did you get? 

 

 

[kbutton]

DH's first employer actually bought individual term policies for their employees, and you could keep them when you left. They were based on exactly the same things as they would be if you bought them on your own. They did a disability policy as well. Because he was young, they are very inexpensive. We had to add policies later because they weren't as much as our financial adviser recommended. We found that other group plans for disability and life insurance were much more expensive (in our case) than getting individual policies. 

 

Get multiple quotes through at least one broker. Don't work with a broker if you get a bad feel. The company that issued the policy my DH had through that first job was really sound, but we did NOT like the agent. He was kind of bossy. IIRC, he did a lot of "well, I am a financial adviser, and I have different recommendations" stuff in a not helpful way (vs. an informative, second-opinion kind of way). The other broker we worked with was super nice.

 

My insurance ended up being cheaper through a company that doesn't specialize in life insurance, which was a big shock since I am overweight, and they don't always have the most competitive rates for life insurance.

 

DH's was better through a completely different company. 

 

We used the same broker for both. That broker helped us with the disability insurance, but he did so by bringing in a colleague that specialized in disability insurance to be sure we had all our bases covered. Disability insurance is very different and weird. Ask about the various riders and what they mean. It's way more complicated than the life insurance.

 

Expect to feel like crap during the process because the questions are seriously intrusive. That said, the people asking them can be nice or they can act like it's a criminal investigation. I complained about the one that acted like it was a criminal investigation, and that I was trying to lie. Our broker was horrified and relayed that information to the company. (See, get a nice broker!) The person they sent out to do the physical was nice, and the broker made sure I got someone nice, professional, and tactful after the questioning experience I had.

 

[Sammish]

I can't remember exactly how much our policy on me is, but we had this talk a few years back. We figured that if something happened to me, kiddo would end up in private school plus afterschool care at the minimum, so it'd need to cover that. 

 

On a related depressing note, we also have a small insurance policy on DS, just enough to basically cover funeral expenses. If the unimaginable were to happen, the last thing we'd want to be thinking about is money. 

[Guest]

Do you have term or whole life?

We have a product that had BOTH... I will see if my dh can explain this to me AGAIN. It is with Northwestern Mutual. I don't know if they sell it anymore.

 

We've made some dumb investments in our day but this is not one of them. We were just talking about this the other day.

[Guest]

I can't remember exactly how much our policy on me is, but we had this talk a few years back. We figured that if something happened to me, kiddo would end up in private school plus afterschool care at the minimum, so it'd need to cover that.

 

On a related depressing note, we also have a small insurance policy on DS, just enough to basically cover funeral expenses. If the unimaginable were to happen, the last thing we'd want to be thinking about is money.

This isn't dumb. My parents did the same thing. I still get a $4.00 dividend each year and when I die my son will get a whole thousand dollars. Haha. But my parents were not wealthy enough to absorb the cost of unexpected funeral expense so they insured it.

 

Come to think of it, even 60 years later and considering inflation, this would still cover my funeral expense (except the plot which we already bought).

[Liz CA]

We've had one on me as well for twenty + years. This is a good reminder OP. I hope your health improves and you get some answers - nobody will be cashing in your policy any time soon!

[MedicMom]

$750,000 between the policy we bought when we had our first child and the small policy I have at work. I was in my late 20s and in great health so we pay something like $26 a month for it. We wanted to make sure all my student loan debt was covered, the house, and enough for day care and other expenses--or in the event we both passed, we wanted to cover day care as well as partial college so grandparents didn't need to struggle.

 

I doubt my husband would leave his job for any amount of time and really would not need a replacement for my income, but we wanted to over insure just in case.

[Wheres Toto]

We have $400,000 on each of us.  We got it a few years ago, it's a 20 year term policy that will probably get us to both kids graduating college.  We chose the amount to pay off the house, and have additional money to live for a while.  Dh also has a policy at work that I think is 1 1/2 times his salary, but I'm not sure.

 

We are looking into if we can do an early renewal since Dh is 60 years old now, and will be 70 when it comes due.  We figure it might be a better rate now, then if we wait.

[MaryMak07]

We have 250,000 on me and 750,000 on DH.

 

Mine would easily cover private school/childcare expenses, and his would allow me to pay off the house and hopefully continue homeschooling for quite some time.

[MaryMak07]

Our policies are Term 80.

[forty-two]

So SAHMs lets chat:

 

How much insurance policy do you have?

 

How did you come up with the number?

 

How many years did you get?

We have 500K on me, for 30 years. I figured the number by calculating private school tuition for the kids and adding in a pad. It would be about 250K to pay for private schools for all three kids (or dh could use it for tutors to continue hs'ing, as his job is flexible and he could have the kids at work with him, or work from home much of the time). The rest is for college or child care or tuition hikes or whatever else comes up. Twenty years would actually be enough wrt covering child care and schooling (my youngest is 5yo), but I was young/healthy enough that 30 years was very affordable.

[maize]

Absolutely get insurance if you can.

 

I'd have to look at my policy but I think it is a 20 year term for about 250,000, with small child and spouse riders. My husband also has child and spouse riders on his policy so there's a bit more on me there.

Edited March 6, 2017 by maize

[TravelingChris]

We have life insurance on me through dh's work.  It is 50K which will pay for funeral and leave him with some more money.   It is enough for now since the kids are grown.  WE have both a work policy and individual policies out on my dh. 

[Guest]

I had life insurance on me via dh's work. They dropped me when I was diagnosed with a serious illness. At that point the children were teens, so it wasn't a biggie. Takeaway: get your insurance privately.

[SKL]

I have less than many of you, but my house is paid off and I have 401K money for my kids' education.  Some people say it isn't enough.  I'm not so sure.  They are past the age when they need constant direct supervision (they attend b&m school).  I think that even if they have to take some of my 401K to pay for expenses, they will still have a start on their college expenses - and one hopes that they would qualify for aid if they have no parents?

 

I should probably look into increasing the amount though, because the cost is pretty low.

[Anne in CA]

Yes, I have always been glad we took out good insurance on me when I was young and healthy. I am still healthy now, but it is good to know that dh would fine if I passed away. The restaurant would not be the same without me, he would need the money very much. 

[solascriptura]

I bought a 500k policy with a 20 year term. I wish I bought a 30 year though.

[solascriptura]

My hubby has 1mill plush work insurance.

[SamanthaCarter]

I'm the non-earning spouse. I have $250K term life with a locked in rate. 

Edited March 7, 2017 by SamanthaCarter

[SamanthaCarter]

I have less than many of you, but my house is paid off and I have 401K money for my kids' education.  Some people say it isn't enough.  I'm not so sure.  They are past the age when they need constant direct supervision (they attend b&m school).  I think that even if they have to take some of my 401K to pay for expenses, they will still have a start on their college expenses - and one hopes that they would qualify for aid if they have no parents?

 

I should probably look into increasing the amount though, because the cost is pretty low.

 

You might be fine. It's for security, not lottery winnings. 

[SamanthaCarter]

I have less than many of you, but my house is paid off and I have 401K money for my kids' education.  Some people say it isn't enough.  I'm not so sure.  They are past the age when they need constant direct supervision (they attend b&m school).  I think that even if they have to take some of my 401K to pay for expenses, they will still have a start on their college expenses - and one hopes that they would qualify for aid if they have no parents?

 

I should probably look into increasing the amount though, because the cost is pretty low.

 

You might be fine. It's for security, not lottery winnings. 

[shawthorne44]

I have a buddy that was a partner at one of the big consulting firms and his specialty was HR.  His theory from a purely mercenary view was that spouse policies were more important to the employer than employee policies.  At roughly the same time he had three employee with deaths.   One employee died, an employee's spouse died with a spouse policy and an employee's spouse died without a spouse policy.  For the last guy, he was basically worthless for a year.  He was dealing with grief, AND he also suddenly had to juggle childcare on his own.  His kids were grieving.  He rushed out and married someone.   The guy that had the spouse policy took some time off to grieve then got a nanny for a little over a year.  For the employee that died, they hired someone else. 

[Jaz]

Dh and I each have 250K term life/30 years we purchased when our first child was born. 

 

We picked up a 750K term life/20 years policy for dh so he could be a mostly homeschool dad.