Dh and I need to lose a lot of weight...

[stansclan89]

Like a 100 lbs or so each.  We obviously haven't eaten the way we should in the past and have no regular exercise habits in place.  I have thought about getting a gym membership, but wouldn't know how to even use it appropriately except maybe the treadmill.  What are all your suggestions for starting a diet and exercise program?  Any books?  Or something else?

[Jean in Newcastle]

Come on over to Sparkpeople.com!  I think this link will get you to our Well-Trained Sparks team, a private team of WTM boardies. http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=8627  

Sparkpeople has places to track food intake, exercise, lots of advice and accountability.  

[Lanny]

You and your DH need to be VERY careful about beginning an exercise program. One of my childhood friends who was always very obese took off that much weight, with a combination of diet and exercise, many years ago. It is very hard for him to keep that weight off.

 

Many years ago, my wife and I went to a gym owned by a famous trainer of Professional Soccer (football in most of the world) players. Their rules required that everyone be examined by their Sports Medicine doctor before beginning an exercise program and their trainers had a B.S. Degree in Physical Education or something related to Sports. 

 

Everyone had their individual regimen. I remember very clearly a woman who was extremely obese and how extremely careful they were with her just walking and how they monitored her.

 

The best thing for you and your DH would be an exercise program run by a local hospital that is supervised by their doctors and where they can set you up with what exercises to do, what machines to use (my wife and I were not permitted to use any machines for approximately the first 6 months we were members of that gym), etc.

 

If you were to just go into a gym where you are not carefully supervised, by someone who is well trained (not someone who worked in McDonalds the week before) you could do severe damage to your body. It could be life threatening.

 

I applaud you and encourage you and your DH with your exercise program and diet. Good luck!

[Slache]

I've lost over 100 pounds.

 

Buy a water bottle and drink nothing but water. No exception.

No snack food. If you snack on fruits and veggies you will increase your fruit and veggie intake while decreasing your garbage intake simultaneously.

Get the free lose it app.

Go on a short hike every. single. day.

I highly recommend the new P90 program from beachbody. Its less than $100. You will get better results and spend less money on a good in home fitness programs than a gym membership.

I also highly recommend Hydroxycut SX7.

Feel free to pm me at any time. I will answer any questions you have honestly.

[Slache]

Here's an old thread of mine with more information. I'm very grateful to have been so overweight because I couldn't just diet for 6 months, I had to actually change my life. I'm a completely different person and my children have reaped the benefit. It was a lot of work, but it was the best decision I ever made. I'm healthier and happier in ways you couldn't possibly imagine.

[Anne]

I agree with Lanny that a medical consultation would be a great idea.  Pending that, review your diet.  What are the biggest areas you need to address?  Pick one to work on.  Maybe it's less sugar or eating more vegetables or drinking more water.  Personally, I can't address a whole raft of changes at once - I need to work on one thing at a time.

 

Exercise - probably walking is a good place for you to start.  Pick a time when you could reasonably expect to be able to exercise most days of the week.  Walk for five minutes.  Increase your time slowly.  Initially, you just want to build a habit.

 

Good luck - Change is hard - but it's worth it!!

 

Anne

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Laura Corin]

I would recommend tracking your food and exercise for a week or two before making changes.  Sparkpeople is good for that.  It will give you an idea of where you are and what your problem foods/times of day are.

[Joanne]

Research shows diet is more than 90% of successful weight loss. Exercise and movement is important for *health*, stamina, and endurance but not very impactful in terms of losing weight.

 

Many obese people find that even then the numbers suggest they should be losing, "it" does not work because of metabolic resistence. This often prohibits success from an eat less/move more paradigm. It that is the case, low/lowered carb can be helpful.

[Evergreen State Sue]

Having your dh on board with you so you can change your eating and exercise habits together is such a blessing.  My dh and I have been on this journey for almost 4 months.  My recommendation is to start with your eating plan first.  Once you see some of your pounds come off, and you feel better, it will give you encouragement to keep going.  What has worked well for us is reducing/eliminating sugar and grains.  As far a exercise is concerned, years ago we joined a gym.  I spent many months paying for a membership I didn't use.  I personally didn't like having to drive someplace to exercise on equipment that other sweaty people had used.  My husband and I weren't able to coordinate our schedules so we didn't go together.  Perhaps if I had someone that went with me, I would have had a better experience.  I learned that just paying for new shoes every 6 months and walking in my neighborhood was great exercise.  You might be different, and that's ok.  It's best to know what you are willing to do on a regular basis.  I wish you well on your journey!

[applethyme]

When I first started exercising I started with Walk Away the Pounds.  It was easy and cheep and something I could do in the privacy of my home.  I would start the video and do as much as I could, increasing the time by a couple of minutes each day. 

[redsquirrel]

As someone who has lost a lot of weight, I can tell you it is a marathon, not a sprint. This is a long game.  Make changes one at a time. Maybe just start eating breakfast? Make one or two healthy changes a week. Start small, with things you can live with and then you will have more courage to make bigger changes as you go on.

 

Don't spend money on a bunch of stuff right now. The biggest changes I made didn't cost much. Honestly the best thing I ever bought was a small kitchen scale and a good set of measuring cups and spoons. The scale was less than 25$ and it was the best investment I have ever made in my health. I weigh my food and track the calories and log it. That is the most important thing I do.

 

Yes, I exercise on a regular basis, yes I eat a very healthy diet...but weighing my food and writing it down (or using my phone app) has been HUGE.

 

Youtube has TONS of free exercise videos. Or you can just walk. Walking is free.  For right now, just make the space in your life for exercise. Find a way to get 30 mins in a day..then bump it up to 45 and then 60. It might not be 60 every day. But find the time even if it is just walking. You can branch out into other things eventually, but just find the time. Try early, try late, try in the middle of the day. Exercise with your husband!  My dh and I love to workout together. It gets cold here and we have spend many a cold winter night doing yoga or P90X or whatever we could find at the library. Just find the time and then worry about what you will do.

 

But remember...long game. Keep your eye on a year or two down the road

[Annie G]

You might want to do some thinking about what might work for you vs what won't. For instance, some people do best when they just cold turkey start a diet and are super strict from day one. For dh and me, that is a disaster. We do better working on one component at a time. (We occasionally find ourselves needing to get back on track, say after a vacation or holiday season or stressful illness).    So our routine is to get breakfast totally under control, eliminate snacks, get dinner under control, and then focus on lunch. It works well for us because lunch is not usually an issue for us, breakfast is easy to get back on track with, etc.      

 

As for exercise, we each have a fitbit and ask each other every day at lunch, end of workday, and at bedtime how many steps we have. We pretend to be competitive but we're not- we're just trying to encourage each other.  Dh has been super busy and super stressed at work and our gym is closed for renovation. It's cold outside. So today we went to Walmart and did laps inside the store while talking. That works well for us to get in a bunch of steps.   Again, it works for US but you have to find what works for you. I love to cycle when the weather is good but that's only 5-6 months a year. So I tried putting my bike on a trainer and it's awful. Dh, on the other hand, prefers to ride on a trainer than on a trail. 

 

So sure, listen to what everyone does, but find something that YOU think you can stick with.   Tweaking your diet, drinking water only, and walking a LOT are great ways to get started. 

 

Hope you have success! We're rooting for you!

[Seasider]

So much good insight already! I will just add that low impact exercise is going to be the best start for you. Walk, walk, walk. Also, if you are comfortable in the water, I recommend you consider water exercising as it helps prevent impact injury to the joints. You could start by just walking back and forth across the pool in water waist high. Progress to what you're comfortable with, perhaps eventually organized classes.

 

It's good you and dh are in it together. Best wishes to you!

[Joyofsixreboot]

Health, health, health!! M.D. Appt, gentle walking. I second the walking videos because when I started exercising i didn't want people to watch me. Simple changes are easiest. Look into the No S diet- basically no seconds, no snacks, no sweets. Nothing strange or undo able. KISS - you know an apple is better than Apple pie, cottage cheese over cream cheese. Slow and steady. Not exciting but doable and sustainable.

[Nemom]

Can you afford of a couple of these: https://www.fitbit.com/zip

 

Would help you to see how many steps you are taking each day and the online apps would be track a bunch of other stuff for you.

[ErinE]

You've had great advice in this thread, but I wanted to add: make small goals. I read once that 10% of your current body weight is a reasonable goal. It's how I lost my excess weight many years ago. I didn't aim for the total goal all at once. I lost it in 10% chunks over a long time.

[Annie G]

You've had great advice in this thread, but I wanted to add: make small goals. I read once that 10% of your current body weight is a reasonable goal. It's how I lost my excess weight many years ago. I didn't aim for the total goal all at once. I lost it in 10% chunks over a long time.

 

 

That's such good advice.  It keeps from feeling like you'll never 'get there' and allows you to celebrate little successes. That's SO important for me and dh. 

[Incognito]

For me, losing weight went well when I found a few really healthy foods I liked a lot and made them the core of what I ate every day.  Then I was satisfied physically and mentally with the food.  That and dropping the evening TV time snacking.  

 

Once you are in the habit of more veggies and less carbs you don't crave them (if craving is a thing for you).  For me, when I have carbs I crave them.  When I am "off" them for a while, I don't sit around constantly wishing I were eating some sugary food (which then doesn't satisfy so I want to eat more and more).

 

HTH

 

 

[milovany]

Wait until really physically hungry to eat (tummy growl, empty feeling -- not just "it's time to eat" or "I'm bored so I'll eat" etc.), and then eat just until satisfied, not stuffed/full.  Lather, rinse, repeat. Wait until you're hungry again to eat; hunger can be your friend.  I love feeling hungry! You can't go into what some call "starvation mode" approaching it this way because you're eating every day.  Maybe not a lot, but you're eating what your body is calling for. Choose healthful foods as much as possible, but don't be too consumed with it, either. 

 

As for exercise, just walk.  Just start walking a little bit at a time even if just around the block once.  It will increase over time.  I disagree that this has to be a major medical event.  Eventually consider a gym membership if you want to.  I belong to a gym where they do a lot of personal coaching and I see that it works well for some people.  I prefer just going to classes and doing my own thing. 

 

As said above, weight loss is more about lowering the calories in, not trying to burn calories you've already eaten.  The easiest calories to burn are the ones you haven't eaten yet! 

[MeghansMom]

I would suggest strength training along with the good advice on this thread.

 

Checking with your doctor first of course.

 

Muscle takes up less room than fat, helps you burn more calories even when you are not exercising

and gives you more energy and stamina.

 

It does not need to be anything complicated either.

A couple of dumbells and/or resistance bands, etc.

If you have a gym membership, the strength machines.

[Sunshine State Sue]

Eat to Live by Dr Joel Fuhrman

 

I love his approach because the goal is to to get the most nutrition for the fewest calories.

 

ETA:  This is one of my favorite quotes (pg 135):

Since heavier people have more stored fat on their body, they do not benefit from a higher intake of dietary fat the same way thin individuals do.  As the overweight lose wieght, they are already on a high-fat diet, consuming their stored body fat.

I thought about that especially when I buckled my belt a little tighter.

[kubiac]

I was just coming here to suggest Furhman's Eat to Live. It's been very powerful for me.

 

Another food book that I found helpful for transitioning my food thinking was Superfoods Rx by Dr. Steven Pratt. 

 

You can't outrun a bad diet.

 

Weight loss>>

Food: 75 percent

Exercise: 25 percent

 

[FO4UR]

I had baby #4 almost 2 years ago now, and I'm 15lbs from my happy weight.  I've gradually lost 40lbs in the last 2 yrs.

 

 

Make the painless changes first.

 

Drink water and lots of it.  Buy yourself and your dh some snazzy water bottles if it makes it more pleasant.

 

Switch from sugar to Stevia.

 

If you drink soda, stop it.  Switch to coffee/tea and sweeten with Stevia if you need a sweet drink.

 

Prioritize your carbs.  If you are dying for a snickers bar, have a snickers bar.  Skip the bread/pasta to make up for those carbs. 

 

Make your carbs come with fiber.  I'm not carb-free, but my carbs are going to work for me or they are goners.  Fiber.

 

Keep plenty of healthy fats around.  A handful of almonds with a sprinkling of chocolate chips can curb that craving for the snickers bar. 

 

Fat-load, calorie-load in the morning. I have a big bowl of oatmeal (sweetened with Stevia), made with milk and coconut oil almost every morning.  I also have 2 eggs loaded with cheese & olive oil.  I munch on fruit through the day. I have a large, late lunch - high protein.  If I'm going to have anymore carbs for the day, it's at lunch.  I go nearly carb-free after 4pm.  Evenings, I only eat meat/veggies. 

 

 

Make a hobby of cooking together, or cooking for each other.  Try new seasonings, new cooking techniques.  Splurge on some nice steaks rather than a restaurant meal.  Indulge yourselves with good foods that you enjoy.  You won't miss the junk.

 

 

I have come to a peace with my patterns of losing in a spurt, and maintaining for a long while before losing in another spurt. As long as I'm not gaining anything back, I refuse to be anxious about it. I am not able to exercise without little kids following me. It is what it is.  I stay active, but I don't stress about gym memberships and such...which I would love for the kid-free time, but I digress...

[violamama]

Come on over to Sparkpeople.com!  I think this link will get you to our Well-Trained Sparks team, a private team of WTM boardies. http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_individual.asp?gid=8627

Sparkpeople has places to track food intake, exercise, lots of advice and accountability.  

 

Jean, can you invite people specifically? I tried that link (I was lurking) and it says you have to be invited. My email is miriamenglish at the mail that is hot. I would really like to join. 

[Jean in Newcastle]

Let me try that.  (I'm a bit new to this part.)

[Jean in Newcastle]

Violamama - you need to join Sparkpeople.  It's free.  Then let me know your Sparkpeople user name and I can invite you.  You can let me know on this thread or by PM.  

[LucyStoner]

Www.gokaleo.com.

 

You can't diet out of this. It's about lifelong, permanent changes not rules or disordered eating dressed up as faddish diets.

 

Start small.

 

Find something active that you really enjoy and do that instead of walk on a treadmill. Unless of course you really love treadmills. Then have at it. For me that is hiking and biking and, see avatar, skating. While food choices are key, for me my food is much easier to keep to keep in balance when I am active and my body needs nutrition in a way it doesn't when I was less active.

[gardenmom5]

for starters - I'd cut sugar.  read labels. learn all the names of "hidden" sugar. cook from scratch.  (someone once gave me spaghetti sauce. it was disgustingly sweet - then I read the label.  wow, that's a lot of sugar.  I have, and do, make mine from scratch.  not only is it healthier - it's cheaper.)

honey, agave - and *especially* "fructose" (all those "no sugar" products - frequently use fructose) are s.u.g.a.r. - and many "low fat" products - add lots of sugar to make up the flavor.  I also avoid artificial sweetners - they often will make you crave more sweets than if you used only 'real' sugar.

 

walk.

 

I have used myfitnesspal to track diet/calories and exercise.

[hornblower]

consider Forks Over Knives http://www.forksoverknives.com/

[GinaPagnato]

All of the above advice is awesome! And, I'll just add, :hurray: :hurray: :hurray: Good for you guys for making the decision to take charge of your health! It may seem daunting, but if you do things gradually to change, it *IS* doable.

 

One helpful tip that worked for me was to really visualize how I wanted to look. Maybe an old picture of yourself from when you were at a healthier weight? I also used Pinterest for fitness and fashion inspiration to keep me motivated.

[gardenmom5]

oh - also, you want to do things that will build muscle.  walking/running on a treadmill doesn't.  muscle burns more calories per pound - even when you're asleep.

[MIch elle]

My sister lost 60 lbs and kept it off with Food Addicts in Recovery:  http://www.foodaddicts.org/   It's a low cost ($2-5/wk for meetings) highly structured support program with a specific low/medium carb food plan. 

[Joanne]

As someone who has lost a lot of weight, I can tell you it is a marathon, not a sprint. This is a long game.  Make changes one at a time. Maybe just start eating breakfast? Make one or two healthy changes a week. Start small, with things you can live with and then you will have more courage to make bigger changes as you go on.

 

 

 

Three resources that may help in this (very wise) regard: (two are weight loss specific, one is not)

 

Mini Habits by Stephen Guise

 

No Time to Lose Diet by Melina Jampolis

 

Four Day Win Dr. Beck

[Joyofsixreboot]

I just want to to add-there's one way to lose and it's different for everyone. What works for me won't necessarily work for you and vice versa. Some do low carb, some do vegan, some make little changes, some go cold turkey. It is easy to get caught up in rules and then feel like a failure if it doesn't work for you or you hop from great thing to great thing. Have a plan that you think will work for you, stick with it, assess the results and tweak but it's easy to hop around and get distracted. Know yourself and plan accordingly. I lost about 40 pounds 2 1/2 years ago but did it not following all the rules. I had to work out what made sense for my life and personality. Just don't give up. Success is never a straight line.

[hornblower]

I want to add that i think it's critical to not think of it as a diet. It's not something you do for a while. It's how you'll live for the rest of your life - which with healthy weight and exercise will hopefully be a long and active one.

[HollyDay]

I agree with others that a trip to the doctor might be  good place to start.  Get some labs run to see if there is any health issues that need to be addressed.  Lifestye change, not diet, is the key.  You need a healthy lifestyle that includes exercise, strength training, aerobics, flexibility, balance.  It is not easy.  I'm typing this to myself as much as I am to the OP.  

 

Some ideas to consider......Cut out the junk:  soda, including diet soda, and all diet drinks and chips.  An IRL GF lost 45 pounds by cutting out soda and chips first.  She then cut out salad dressing and mayonaise.  She started walking everyday. 

 

There are a lot of fad diets that come and go.  Most involve cutting out or greatly limiting a food group.  Others, such as Weight Watchers, focus more on calories.  Pick something you can live with long term.  You don't want to yo-yo.  Can you get a consult with a nutritionist? 

 

Plan ahead.  It is hard to make good choices when hungry. 

[stansclan89]

Thanks for all the advice.  I've been reading every word and will continue to as long as anyone is still interested enough to write it. We're still mulling over how to procede.

 

The things that we both seem to agree on so far are--

 

Neither of us wants to count calories. We seem to do pretty good with our eating habits about 50% of the time, so we just need to work on the other 50%. 

 

I think a big part of this is changing our snack foods to healthy ones.  We don't have many unhealthy ones that we buy on a regular basis. We don't drink sodas except when eating out (not often), don't have any sweets unless it is made from scratch (the kids make some, but I don't), and the only chips we have are plain corn chips. For me that would be not eating chips and salsa every time I get the munchies, for dh that would be not eating a sandwich with homemade bread between meals.  I think if I had a vegi tray available we would both use it, but it's not currently available and neither of us wants to cut up vegis every time we want something.

 

The rest of the food is in meal planning.  I really like what Slache was saying she does for eating--protein and fruit/vegis for breakfast, vegis for lunch, and a fairly regular dinner (for what we tend to eat, anyway).  That lets me make dinner for everyone just once.  I also read the thread you (Slache) linked to--I'm really impressed with what you have done.

 

For exercise, I would like to talk to someone that knows how to advise us on how to procede without hurting ourselves.   I was trying to do couch to 5k, but slower than they recommend (like 6 months to get there instead of 9 weeks).  I think I will still incorporate this but would like to do some sort of weight training also.  I'm not sure how to do weight training so will definitely need help there. 

 

I would like to join the gym in the small town where we live.  The gym (the only one) is locally owned by someone that has lost 100 lbs and has tried to hire people that can help with this sort of thing.  I think it will help to have an opportunity to do something out of the house that is just for me and that we are paying for so that I will feel guilty if I don't use it.  I have found that I actually like walking on treadmill while listening to podcasts.  They also have free classes if I want some variety. (Zumba, Yoga, Boot Camp, Spinning, etc.)  And they are only month-to-month (no contracts).

 

Dh, on the other hand, does not want to join a gym.  He would rather just do things at home in his pj's ;). Hopefully with us being accountable to each other, we will be able to keep it up even though we can't really do it together at the same time.

 

I guess we have decided on quite a bit ;).  A doctor visit probably wouldn't be a bad idea either, but we don't have a regular doctor...I hate finding a doctor.

[sweetstitches]

This is what is working for me:

 

1. I've been tracking everything I eat with The Fitness Pal app.

 

2. DH & I got each other fitbit charges (for Christmas, but I got mine early) and I try to keep increasing my steps every day.

 

3. I just did 2 challenges on diet better.com, and won (Yay!) and I've found it a good way to stay motivated. I'm signing up again.

 

4. I use doTERRA's Slim & Sassy, which really helps me control my appetite.

 

5. We recently bought a good quality mini-tramp, and I'm finding it easy to jump for just a few min. Here and there. Ours is good for up to 300 lbs.