Talk to your child about drugs. Update in post 1.

[regentrude]

Update:

The family will withdraw life support this morning.

 

Drugs do not discriminate. Being a "good kid", having a loving stable home, being a good student, being an athlete - none of these are a guarantee. The scary truth is that once was once too much. I am sure none of the kids thought it could happen to them.

 

Telling his story in the hope that maybe it prevents one kid from doing the same is all we can do as we grieve with his family.

 

 

 

_____________________________________________________________________

18 years ago, in the dark ages of the internet, I joined one of the due date lists for pregnant women all due the same month. Many of us have met in real life, we are still keeping in touch daily through facebook, and have been a source of friendship and support to one another while we were raising our children.

 

Now one of the 17 y/o "babies" - a college freshman -  is in the hospital. He had taken several recreational drugs, which caused a heart attack. He's in induced hypothermia to try to control his brain swelling,and it is unknown at this point what his outcome will be.

 

This is an absolute shock, heartbreaking and devastating. Hug your kids and talk to them yet once more about drugs. And keep the family in your thoughts.

[JudoMom]

18 years ago, in the dark ages of the internet, I joined one of the due date lists for pregnant women all due the same month. Many of us have met in real life, we are still keeping in touch daily through facebook, and have been a source of friendship and support to one another while we were raising our children.

 

Now one of the 17 y/o "babies" - a college freshman -  is in the hospital. He had taken several recreational drugs, which caused a heart attack. He's in induced hypothermia to try to control his brain swelling,and it is unknown at this point what his outcome will be.

 

This is an absolute shock, heartbreaking and devastating. Hug your kids and talk to them yet once more about drugs. And keep the family in your thoughts.

 

Wow, I'm so sorry.  That's very sad.  Thanks for the reminder.

[elegantlion]

:grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

Thank you for the reminder, I hate that updates have to come like this.  

[maize]

Oh, I am so sorry to hear this, I hope he recovers and thank you for the reminder.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Whenever I talk to my kids about drugs, alcohol, sex,. . . they say "so what happened to someone on your board"?  

[trulycrabby]

That is heartbreaking, regentrude. I am so sorry, and will keep this family in my thoughts. :grouphug:

[creekland]

This is definitely heartbreaking.

 

We've talked with ours and shown them plenty of examples throughout the years.  Then they fly away from the coop (even if still living at home or still in high school) and we parents all have to hold our breath for what seems like ages.

 

They are their own selves and we can merely watch and pray sometimes, but yes, I do feel it's important to talk about ALL issues out there in life in the hopes that they have gleaned some important info along the way.

 

Best wishes to your friend's son.

[FO4UR]

How scary and heartbreaking!

 

 

I send high hopes for your friend's ds. If it helps at all, my dd underwent an induced hypothermia cooling protocol b/c of brain trauma at birth. If done in time, that treatment is nothing short of miraculous! 

[GinaPagnato]

:crying:

 

What a nightmare. I'm so sorry for your friend and her boy.

[Chris in VA]

Sorry to hear that.

 

I think what steams me about current recreational drugs is the misinformation that they are "ok." Ecstacy, for example, is seen as completely safe by many, many kids. Kids who won't do anything else will still do Molly. No one seems to be telling them about the heart damage that shows up, damage that is strongly linked to Molly, but there's not enough research to get definite answers, just "we are seeing this damage (heart pain, mostly) in Molly users"--and other things researchers are just finding out.

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

The use of the adjective "recreational" seems to indicate that we don't take the use of drugs very seriously. It's subtle, I know, but I think using that adjective softens the reality that using drugs is a serious decision.

[ErinE]

Sorry to hear that.

 

I think what steams me about current recreational drugs is the misinformation that they are "ok." Ecstacy, for example, is seen as completely safe by many, many kids. Kids who won't do anything else will still do Molly. No one seems to be telling them about the heart damage that shows up, damage that is strongly linked to Molly, but there's not enough research to get definite answers, just "we are seeing this damage (heart pain, mostly) in Molly users"--and other things researchers are just finding out.

Not just that, but the kids don't know where this stuff is coming from. It's not okay to take candy from a stranger. Why would drugs be any better?

[Timbers6]

Yep will do.

I wk in a busy ER (pretty rural, though) and recently an 18 yr old boy died from bath salts.

So sorry.

[mommybee]

Whenever I talk to my kids about drugs, alcohol, sex,. . . they say "so what happened to someone on your board"?

Me too......I guess I've been here too long.....it's become a part of my life.

[maize]

Yep will do.

I wk in a busy ER (pretty rural, though) and recently an 18 yr old boy died from bath salts.

So sorry.

Bath salts? Do you mean Epsom salt or something else? What was he doing with them? Is there some sort of bath salt that is used as a drug?

 

The whole world of drugs is very foreign to me.

[regentrude]

Bath salts? Do you mean Epsom salt or something else? What was he doing with them? Is there some sort of bath salt that is used as a drug?

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bath_salts_%28drug%29

 

It's not actual bath salts.

 

[Annie G]

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's son.  I hope he pulls out of this. 

I remember those due date lists- I joined one 'Babies born July 92' on Prodigy, the month dd was born.  Our group became very close, though we kind of splintered when the kids hit middle school. 

 

A friend of our youngest two kids- an AWESOME kid, very involved in theater and his church, well loved by everyone...got involved with some drugs ( I think perhaps the term is recreational because it was an occasional thing- like at a couple of parties)  and something went horribly wrong and he ended up in a coma. After five weeks, he passed away, a little more than a week ago. It was awful. It still is. I feel for his parents, who knew nothing about the boy doing any drugs and having to face it this way. 

[Joanne]

The reason the accurate and authentic use of the term "recreational" is important is because humans HAVE been using drugs recreationally since the beginning of time. The majority of teens will at least try drugs/alcohol before they are 20.

 

And there are millions of people who use alcohol and/ or marijuana recreationally and not abusively.

 

And it is important that people know that kids don't start because of low self esteem or even peer pressure or lack of assertiveness. They try because the potential of fun and the romance of mystery outweighs their perception of the risks.

 

BTW, please please please beg your kids to never ever even try Kush, spice, c2 or synthetic.

[naturemom]

I hope he makes a full recovery.

Thanks for the reminder, regentrude.

[Only me]

This is so heart breaking. I will definitely keep them in my thoughts and prayers. This is also a good reminder to have an ongoing dialogue with my kids even though they are getting older.

 

I've also tried to get my kids to understand that while someone may not have a bad reaction to drugs someone else might and that it can happen the first time.

 

Even with alcohol this is true. What may cause someone to barely feel loopy can cause someone else to become drunk or sick (depending On several factors: size, gender, metabolism)

 

Even those vapor cigarettes make me nervous. My kids have no interest in any of that but it is so common in school. I've heard of bad reactions with that too.

[Arcadia]

Whenever I talk to my kids about drugs, alcohol, sex,. . . they say "so what happened to someone on your board"?

Ecstasy was a common drug pass around freely in discotheques/nightclubs a few decades ago and it's still around now.

 

News of kids getting hospitalized for laced brownies given to them by schoolmates still appear now and then.

[maize]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bath_salts_%28drug%29

 

It's not actual bath salts.

 

I thought there must be some meaning I was missing...

[Melissa in Australia]

The reason the accurate and authentic use of the term "recreational" is important is because humans HAVE been using drugs recreationally since the beginning of time. The majority of teens will at least try drugs/alcohol before they are 20.

 

And there are millions of people who use alcohol and/ or marijuana recreationally and not abusively.

 

And it is important that people know that kids don't start because of low self esteem or even peer pressure or lack of assertiveness. They try because the potential of fun and the romance of mystery outweighs their perception of the risks.

 

BTW, please please please beg your kids to never ever even try Kush, spice, c2 or synthetic.

 

subtlety encouraging drug use again. I don't think you realize how often you do this

[EndOfOrdinary]

The issues now are that you cannot talk about "drugs." You have to talk about substances: Bath salts, Trippin' on Tussin (as in Robitussin), buying Ritalin and Aderal to get through tests, doing Whip-It's...very few of the things that many kids start with are "drugs" in the sense of X, Heroin, PCP, Cocaine,g Meth. Mollie is rampant around here, but kids don't start with it. They start with Fedrin (Sudafed) and Ritalin. I think large amounts of parents discuss drugs to mean pot or acid. That is not a kid's world anymore. I can easily see how many youth view over the counter meds, frequently prescribed meds, and standard household items as somehow not dangerous. Hell, the Choking Game doesn't even involve substances. It has nothing to do with recreational and everything to do with the fact very few parents even know what is used to get high.

 

As someone who has worked with and whose husband still works with troubled youth, I would be grateful if my son smoked pot. The other stuff is terrifying.

 

Good luck to your friend's family regentrude. Hopefully the boy will be able to one day chock this up to being young and dumb, not dead and reckless.

[creekland]

And it is important that people know that kids don't start because of low self esteem or even peer pressure or lack of assertiveness. They try because the potential of fun and the romance of mystery outweighs their perception of the risks.

 

 

In my world (public high school), peer pressure is a big part of it.  It's peers who are telling others what they are "missing" as well as how the adults are "wrong" about the dangers.  Then too it's peers who are the suppliers.

 

By 20 I can agree that a majority have tried something, esp if you include alcohol.  We just purposely went to Canada with middle son so he could legally have a drink with us.  Part of what we teach as parents is social drinking - while still showing how that's different from going out and getting drunk.  To us, the latter is a huge waste of time, brain cells, and money.

 

However, I'm not at all convinced the majority have tried drugs of the types talked about in this thread - at any age - and those who do are pretty much all brought there via peers (or family) in my world.  I seriously can't think of a single example where a teen decided to go find something totally on their own with no peer involvement.

 

Youngest goes to a "druggie" college (one that ranks high on the recreational use of marijuana on Princeton Review's list).  He's seen students there try it for the first time, but he also mentioned it was peers who led the others there.  If I'm to believe him (no reason not to), my guy is not interested.  He may stay that way or may not, but if he changes, I can guarantee it's due to peers.

 

Middle is an RA at his college.  Not long ago he spent a night in the ER with one of his freshmen who had gone to a concert with drugs all around.  That young man isn't interested in the "thrill" any longer!  Middle son has never had any interest - nor have his close friends.

 

Some opt to never allow their kids to go away to school due to that kind of peer pressure.  It's been around since the beginning of time.  We've taught ours all about it.  What they choose to do with their lives is 100% up to them.  We see more opportunity and good in college than fear of the bad, and so far, it's been that way for us and our kids.

[Joanne]

subtlety encouraging drug use again. I don't think you realize how often you do this

I don't encourage drug use. Drug or alcohol use is the onset mechanism for disease in predisposed brains.

 

But a "don't ever try" policy is a fail and it patronizes teens who see and witness actual recreation use all the time in the adults around them.

 

My IOP is filled with DARE graduates, Christians, other religious conservatives.

[Ipsey]

subtlety encouraging drug use again. I don't think you realize how often you do this

 

 

How in the world was she encouraging drug use?

 

Joanne said:

 

>>The reason the accurate and authentic use of the term "recreational" is important is because humans HAVE been using drugs recreationally since the beginning of time. The majority of teens will at least try drugs/alcohol before they are 20.<<

 

This is a fact. How does this encourage any one to do anything? 

 

>>And there are millions of people who use alcohol and/ or marijuana recreationally and not abusively.<<

 

This is a fact. How does this encourage anyone to do anything?

 

>>And it is important that people know that kids don't start because of low self esteem or even peer pressure or lack of assertiveness. They try because the potential of fun and the romance of mystery outweighs their perception of the risks.<<

 

This is a simple fact. How does this encourage anyone to do anything.

 

>>BTW, please please please beg your kids to never ever even try Kush, spice, c2 or synthetic.<<

 

I will do that. 

 

This sort of "facts are encouragement" nonsense stifles information and education of children which DOES in fact encourage risky behaviors. Ignoring basic facts and sticking one's head in the sand is far more dangerous than educating people and recognizing reality.

[creekland]

It is not a fact.

 

The kids that I know start because they are looking for stress relief.  Many are peer pressured into their first drink....they are at a friends house, and they find attitudes have changed...the parents are supplying. They are looked at as children if they dont consume. There is NO mystery.  My son needs both hands to count the number of middle and high school classmates who were put on homebound instruction while they were in treatment after they came to school at 7:15 in the a.m. drunk or high numerous times. He's seen the effects, he's seen the illness. He's got two acquaintances (children who were in every class with him) that already have premature aging of the skin due to the amount they consumed starting in fifth grade. He's got two neighbors who started dealing in middle school. They are both in state prison now. He has a dead friend...high on mj while running a rec vehicle. No mystery at all. What is a mystery is the reason that adults walk around saying it is safe, without telling the children what the effects on their brain and body will be, long term, or that they will be serving substantial prison time if there is collateral damage in the form of deaths.

 

They can be looking for fun, belonging, or stress relief.  Other than adding some of that, I'm completely with you with what I've seen IRL.  I've made sure my guys have seen it too.

[maize]

I don't encourage drug use. Drug or alcohol use is the onset mechanism for disease in predisposed brains.

 

But a "don't ever try" policy is a fail and it patronizes teens who see and witness actual recreation use all the time in the adults around them.

 

My IOP is filled with DARE graduates, Christians, other religious conservatives.

 

There are also a lot of kids out there who have taken "don't ever try" to heart. Drugs were plenty common when I was in high school in Europe in the 90's (though not today's drugs, which leave me unfortunately scratching my head in confusion). I never tried, and I was not the only one.

 

The fact that you see the fails doesn't mean there are no successes. I imagine the successes cross your radar less frequently...

 

ETA: I never tried alcohol either, though the vast majority of my peers drank regularly (it was perfectly legal where we were...) My parents and my church were a major influence in my life, and I embraced their values wholeheartedly.

[kroe1]

Working in an ER, I have a very jaded opinion about chemical alteration of the brain in any form. There is no magic chemical that only alters the brain. There is no magic chemical that does not permanently alter something, somewhere although this may be dose dependent initially. Calling something recreational only means somebody got lucky in the short term.

 

But, as parents we can preach until we are blue, yet, until we clean out our own medicine cabinets, refrigerators, shirt pockets, etc. then how can we expect teens to do otherwise? Our society condones chemical alteration in many forms and the tolerance grows daily, both individually and politically. And when the medical community is pushing most of the chemicals, I do not see outcomes like Regentrudes' friend getting any better.

 

Even we old geezers watched our parents serve alcohol at a dinner party. Now we are caring for those old "social" drinkers with vascular disease and dementia, Really cannot understand why we cannot even have a good time with friends without some form of brain alteration, I sure wish someone had taught that to my alcoholic demented mother-in-law who lives with me. (And she was not a heavy drinker.).

[Joanne]

What is a mystery is the reason that adults walk around saying it is safe, without telling the children what the effects on their brain and body will be, long term, or that they will be serving substantial prison time if there is collateral damage in the form of deaths.

Adults tell kids this all the time; informally as suggested by this thread and formally in school programs.

[Joanne]

There are also a lot of kids out there who have taken "don't ever try" to heart. Drugs were plenty common when I was in high school in Europe in the 90's (though not today's drugs, which leave me unfortunately scratching my head in confusion). I never tried, and I was not the only one.

 

The fact that you see the fails doesn't mean there are no successes. I imagine the successes cross your radar less frequently...

 

ETA: I never tried alcohol either, though the vast majority of my peers drank regularly (it was perfectly legal where we were...) My parents and my church were a major influence in my life, and I embraced their values wholeheartedly.

No, you have an inaccurate understanding of my perception. The don't ever policy is a fail practically and functionally.

 

But I don't consider (especially older) teens experimenting a "fail".

 

The majority of people end up not having a problem. Many who over consume during college year ages and mature into no or reasonable use. Those are people who don't have a diseased brain but enjoy the effects in context of partying peers. Early on, this masks the habits and patterns of those developing disease.

[creekland]

The majority of people end up not having a problem. Many who over consume during college year ages and mature into no or reasonable use. Those are people who don't have a diseased brain but enjoy the effects in context of partying peers. Early on, this masks the habits and patterns of those developing disease.

 

The majority who get behind a wheel while under the influence make it home ok.

 

The majority who text and drive don't hit anyone or anything.

 

I still take a "don't ever" approach with those issues too as the "what ifs" are incredibly bad.

 

We make an exception with alcohol as I see some benefits to that with limited use - never getting a buzz type of use - plus it's so common socially around the world.

 

But I see no need to inhale anything.

 

Heck, I rarely take over the counter or prescription drugs either.  I have to really be convinced of their need.

 

I see many successes to be honest.

 

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

 

I've been pondering about peer-pressure all morning.

 

I've never smoked pot or drank and this was before DARE. I was raised just above poverty level and recall older people in my neighborhood openly smoking blunts (mid 70's) and as a teen, I saw my upper-middle-class friends smoking from a bong right under their parent's noses at parties. These kids were cheerleaders, class officers, and athletes. I was pretty shocked. That experience has made me cynical of the illusion that kids from "good neighborhoods" are "good" kids. The biggest drug dealer in my school was the son of navy officers and lived in the gated community. He was a clean-cut dude and I'm not sure he even used himself. His sister would come to class stoned and it was laughed off. I have shared these stories with my teens and they have shared similar experiences with me.

 

I'm not sure why I never tried it. Maybe because I never thought stoned people weren't that interesting? I knew it was illegal, but I'm not sure that had anything to do with it. I don't recall ever feeling peer-pressure as a teen. I could never fit it with the popular kids because of my social-economic status, so I didn't try. I was really my own person and did my own thing without feeling bad about it. I'm still that way and I think my kids are as well. It has served me well as I've encountered negativity about my unconventional educational and free-range child-rearing choices. I just don't take the judgement of other people seriously. Kind of arrogant on my part, but again, it has served me well.

[PrincessMommy]

18 years ago, in the dark ages of the internet, I joined one of the due date lists for pregnant women all due the same month. Many of us have met in real life, we are still keeping in touch daily through facebook, and have been a source of friendship and support to one another while we were raising our children.

 

Now one of the 17 y/o "babies" - a college freshman -  is in the hospital. He had taken several recreational drugs, which caused a heart attack. He's in induced hypothermia to try to control his brain swelling,and it is unknown at this point what his outcome will be.

 

This is an absolute shock, heartbreaking and devastating. Hug your kids and talk to them yet once more about drugs. And keep the family in your thoughts.

 

I see the thread has descended into a bit of a "discussion" :rolleyes:  but I'm wondering if there is an update?  What a horrible thing for everyone. 

[Ipsey]

I suppose I was unclear here.

 

I don't think that all kids try because they are looking for something fun and interesting to do, but that certainly is a part of it for some kids.

I don't think that all kids start because they're pressured into it.

 

I know kids who are alone when they try drugs because they're curious about how it feels and have heard that it is fun.

 

It appeared to me that Joanne was simply saying that some kids try because of curiosity and eagerness to feel something different--not that EVERYONE came at it from this direction.

 

I never did any sort of drug or alcohol.  The first drink I ever had was wine when living in France as a legal 20 year old.  

 

I just never wanted to try it. I knew about the dangers, but I also knew that many of the kids I knew did do drugs, including alcohol, and I just did otherwise.  I don't know why I was never really pressured to do it, even when I, rarely, went to a kegger. I just drank pop.  

 

All of the kids that did pot and alcohol? Most are fine and functioning and healthy adults.  

 

Teaching kids that as one of my baptist friends says, "the mouth of a beer bottle is the gateway to hell" is belied by what our teens see all the time. 

 

I'd rather teach my children about the very serious dangers of drugs and alcohol to developing brains, and the various effects of different drugs (cocaine?  much worse than pot!) than pretend it's all the same and that the kids smoking pot today will be the crack whores of tomorrow.

 

I do hope my kids NEVER do illegal drugs. I don't want my kids to be alcoholics (and if they choose to be teetotalers like me, all the better!) but I think education and honesty is better than hyperbole and knee-jerk hysteria.

 

 

[regentrude]

I see the thread has descended into a bit of a "discussion" :rolleyes:  but I'm wondering if there is an update?  What a horrible thing for everyone. 

 

Last night's update was not good. Brain activity was minimal. The situation is very serious. We are waiting for updates.

 

[Ipsey]

Last night's update was not good. Brain activity was minimal. The situation is very serious. We are waiting for updates.

 

I'm so sorry to hear that.

 

This thread has encouraged me to talk with my kids again about drugs.

[Just Kate]

I'm so sorry to hear that.

 

This thread has encouraged me to talk with my kids again about drugs.

 

I'm so sorry, as well. What a sad situation.

 

I know I probably need to start talking more specifically to my 10 year old (more than "drugs are bad"). Any thoughts on how specific at this age? He attends a small Christian school, and while I am not naive enough to think that all of the kids are angels there, I feel the same about his school friends as I did about his homeschool friends back when he was homeschooled (if that makes any sense). 

[maize]

Last night's update was not good. Brain activity was minimal. The situation is very serious. We are waiting for updates.

 

Oh, I am so sorry for him and his family :(

[elegantlion]

Last night's update was not good. Brain activity was minimal. The situation is very serious. We are waiting for updates.

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:

[PrincessMommy]

Last night's update was not good. Brain activity was minimal. The situation is very serious. We are waiting for updates.

 

I'm so sorry to hear this.  :grouphug:   prayers for everyone involved.

[MBM]

First of all, I am so sorry to hear about your friend's son, regentrude. Having a child in that situation must be one of the absolute worst things a parent can experience. So very frightening.

 

Regarding drugs, all addictive behaviors and substances involve the release of dopamine. Adolescents have an increase in the neural activity that utilizes dopamine. (Dopamine is a neurotransmitter, a chemical, that plays a key role in our drive for reward.) Some research also shows that adolescents actually have a low baseline level of dopamine but will have a greater release of it than other age groups when they do something exciting or new. The thrill causes them to feel the effects from the rush of dopamine. This isn't so bad because it drives teens to explore and discover, but it's something that should be understood and properly channelled. Knowing how this works is just as important as knowing what is happening with their bodies as they physically mature.

 

Another problem is impulsivity -- making a decision without taking a bit of time to reflect and be self aware -- which is controlled by regulatory fibers in the brain. In order to have good impulse control, these fibers need be connected and working together. An adolescent's brain is going through a massive process of restructuring. As they practice self control, they will connect the fibers. This is a mental exercise that takes conscious, consistent effort.

 

Teens also engage in hyperrational thinking, where they place a lot of weight on positive outcomes and not enough on negative outcomes. That means they don't acknowledge the potential harm all that clearly when making decisions. Hyperrational thinking is driven by their dopamine-reward system and is not necessarily impulsive; in fact, it is often well thought out. It's not unusual for teens to ponder these decisions for long periods of time. Downplaying the harm pushes them to try new and dangerous things. They're moving beyond the boundaries. Later, in emotionally healthy adolescents, hyperrationality develops into gist thinking which gives weight to both the pros and cons and also uses intuition when making decisions.

 

If you are worried about addiction, read Dan Siegel's book Brainstorm, especially the chapter titled "Dopamine, Decisions, and the Drive for Reward."

 

Additionally, like Joanne said, some people are much more likely to become addicted than others. This has to do with the way their neural circuits were formed by experiences and sometimes just by their biology. These are usually individuals who experienced a lot of trauma when they were young. Sexual abuse is especially insidious but trauma can be neglect, divorce, violence, beatings, etc. The less trauma experienced, the healthier the brain wires itself. The Adverse Childhood Experiences Study (ACEs) explains this in more detail.

 

The good news is that caregivers can do things to help prevent kids from using. For those who've experienced a lot of trauma, help them heal. Linda Lantieri and others have devised ways to do this. Education is important, too. Make an effort to learn what drugs can do and then teach your children. Someone on these forums once mentioned a book that explains what drugs do to the body. I'll try to find the name of the book. It doesn't condone drug use but explains what happens.

 

Here's the book, Buzzed: The Straight Facts About the Most Used and Abused Drugs from Alcohol to Ecstasy, which was recommended by raptor_dad in another thread:

http://www.amazon.com/Buzzed-Straight-Alcohol-Ecstasy-Edition/dp/0393329852

 

Understand what your teen is going through. They are all susceptible to some degree. Don't just think they're being crazy or immature. That's a copout. Take the time to educate yourself so that you can help them navigate their adolescence. (Adolescence, btw, is a transition period from childhood to adulthood that takes place from about ages 12 to 24.)

[Arcadia]

When a friend was in ICU for three months, another child was in ICU in coma for a year and made a full recovery. Miracles do happen.

[nansk]

BTW, please please please beg your kids to never ever even try Kush, spice, c2 or synthetic.

How does one even keep track of all these names? "Bath salts" sounds so innocuous! There will be a million new names by the time my dd is high school/college age. Where do I go to get educated on what these things look like and their latest names?

[Arcadia]

Any thoughts on how specific at this age? He attends a small Christian school.

Does his school have red ribbon week (drug awareness week)? My school district has and it is so gimmicky (K-8th grade) the things they do that week that kids just think the events are fun instead of learning anything. I don't know how the high school does it.

 

When I was a kid, a schoolboy sat not far from my front door and inhale the thinner for liquid paper. There were kids who inhale turpentine as well as kids who inhale super glue. A child was hospitalized for that.

 

My kids are aware a lot of common use substance can be abused but I don't think it quite sink in yet. I grew up in a drug neighborhood and the real life evidence all around me just sinks in.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Regentrude, I'm thinking of your friends and how that things might have a better turn for them.  How terribly sad.   :grouphug:

[TeacherZee]

Regentrude I will keep your friends in the light!

 

We have a real problem with spice here right now, and a big part of the problem is the ever changing nature of the drug. In order to be able to sell it online the actual substance changes subtle often and this means that even a kid who took it with "no ill effects" last week could be dead from it next week because it is slightly different.

 

I understand what Joanne is saying about the "just say no" approach not working. For me, I think part of the problem is that the "just say no" approach has a shaming aspect to it that can mean that teens ones they have tried it feel like what is the point of saying no now, I am already "dirty" (can't think of a better word here but dirty isn't exactly what I mean either).

[Just Kate]

Regentrude I will keep your friends in the light!

 

We have a real problem with spice here right now, and a big part of the problem is the ever changing nature of the drug. In order to be able to sell it online the actual substance changes subtle often and this means that even a kid who took it with "no ill effects" last week could be dead from it next week because it is slightly different.

 

I understand what Joanne is saying about the "just say no" approach not working. For me, I think part of the problem is that the "just say no" approach has a shaming aspect to it that can mean that teens ones they have tried it feel like what is the point of saying no now, I am already "dirty" (can't think of a better word here but dirty isn't exactly what I mean either).

 

I understand what you are saying. I came from a "just say no" family regarding drugs, sex, and everything in between. I sadly didn't listen to my parents at that time and I remember feeling like once I crossed that line, well, it was  already crossed so no need to stop now! So I get that "just say no" doesn't work. Unfortunately, I can't figure out what would have worked with me. (for what it's worth, I was a "good" kid - honors classes, hung out with other "good" kids, respected and loved my parents, etc. Not really sure why I felt the need to do some of what I did at that age).

[Annie G]

I'm so sorry, as well. What a sad situation.

 

I know I probably need to start talking more specifically to my 10 year old (more than "drugs are bad"). Any thoughts on how specific at this age? He attends a small Christian school, and while I am not naive enough to think that all of the kids are angels there, I feel the same about his school friends as I did about his homeschool friends back when he was homeschooled (if that makes any sense). 

 

 

One thing that kids that age often need to explicitly be taught is that just because Johnny has a ritalin prescription doesn't mean it's safe for YOU to take it. Sharing prescription drugs is becoming such a 'thing' and middle school (and older) kids think it's a safe way to 'be cool'.  It's also not ok to take OTC drugs without asking you first, though we did teach our girls that taking motrin for cramps was ok without calling us.   I think these are good places to start with a ten year old.