nursing in public and modesty

[Word Nerd]

On another forum, I was bothered by the notion expressed by a few women that nursing in public is only acceptable if the woman uses a blanket, Hooter Hider, or other cover-up. Just curious how prevalent this opinion is.

[Jorsay]

Speaking as a male, I feel more comfortable if they cover up.

[secular_mom]

None of my children ever appreciated any type of cover up. I was still able to nurse them discretely in public.

[KingM]

This is a man's perspective, but I am neither bothered nor titillated by a woman nursing. It is the most natural thing in the world and there should be no shame associated with it.

[mommaduck]

I have absolutely not problem nursing in public. Personally, I feel the same way about in church, but out of courtesy will seek out a quiet spot until I know what the feelings of others are. My child is easily distracted anyhow. Using a cover is impossible with my child.

 

Good blog post I found on the subject:

 

http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1502195/PIOG_Breastfeeding_Offensive

[mommaduck]

This is a man's perspective, but I am neither bothered nor titillated by a woman nursing. It is the most natural thing in the world and there should be no shame associated with it.

 

KingM, you are just awesome for that post...thank you!

[amy g.]

I think we have had this debate before.

[mommaduck]

I think we have had this debate before.

 

It's one of those yearly topics ;)

[Heather in OK]

It doesn't bother me at all if a woman nurses her baby in public, covered or not. Women should never be made to feel like they HAVE to cover themselves to breastfeed.

[JennC]

I absolutely disagree with that notion. I have nursed all 5 of my children where I sat when they were hungry. I have, of course, tried to to discreet, but that is not my priority.

Last night on O'Reilly I think he made an ignoramus of himself when he acted shocked that this was OK. "so we have to see that at the 7-11" mentality. Probably other things to be offended by at the 7-11.

OK, here's my beef - We have to see that 45 yo's crack while she wears too tight, too low pants - not to mention her tube top - around the mall. (no flames per swimsuit thread - it is said tongue-in-cheek) No one complains about that, but we have to have a law in some states ALLOWING BREASTFEEDING IN PUBLIC. The reason we NEED this law is ignorant people who have told nursing moms that they have to leave the establisment or nurse in the BATHROOM - gross. No one tells the flasher chicks that they must wear a sweater.

No one complains about breasts (or any other body parts) being uncovered - - -unless they are being used for their natural purpose of feeding babies.

[Georgiana Daniels]

On another forum, I was bothered by the notion expressed by a few women that nursing in public is only acceptable if the woman uses a blanket, Hooter Hider, or other cover-up. Just curious how prevalent this opinion is.

 

Hooter Hider? Oh my, never heard of those before. :001_huh:

 

Nothing wrong with feeding a baby in public. A kid's gotta eat! I personally preferred to be discreet with a blanket when I was nursing, but I realize that doesn't work for everyone. What I didn't like was when someone asked me exactly how long I planned to nurse my kid, as though my baby were way too old already.

[JennC]

Speaking as a male, I feel more comfortable if they cover up.

 

Speaking as a female mother of boys, I am more comfortable if the girls of this country would cover themselves modestly. But I teach my boys not to stare. "avert your eyes"

[HRAAB]

This is a man's perspective, but I am neither bothered nor titillated by a woman nursing. It is the most natural thing in the world and there should be no shame associated with it.

 

This is exactly my dh's perspective. Of course we're not bothered by children being fed by their mothers.

 

Janet

[amy g.]

I carry my license at all times.

 

http://www.dshs.state.tx.us/wichd/bf/pdf/13-06-10830.pdf

[Word Nerd]

Hooter Hider? Oh my, never heard of those before. :001_huh:

 

 

 

Yes, it's a real product!

[Georgiana Daniels]

Yes, it's a real product!

 

I learn something new every day!

[hornblower]

I'm an IBCLC and a retired LLL Leader; just stating my bias :D

 

I breastfed both mine for many years. And I raised them (ds & dd) to know what breasts are for.

 

The number of posters and anatomical drawings & textbooks around the house have immunized them against boobs. I can't imagine him staring because he wouldn't care. Or he'd give a thumbs up & start talking about how good it is blah, blah, blah.

 

I used to have little cards to hand out to moms breastfeeding in public. Now I just thumbs up & say 'good for you!'.

 

But then we've also gone to topless beach resorts etc & we're not bothered by nudity. The overt sexualization portrayed in pop culture - yes; nudity - no.

[farmmom4him]

I have a feeling you are asking about a post I made on another forum. ;o)

 

If you are, here is a bit more information on the situation.

 

Our family went to a water park. We had all six of our children with us and our baby girl was hungry. I wore my nursing tankini--with swim skirt--top is two layers like a nursing top. ;o)

 

I sat down to feed her wrapped a towel around my shoulders that draped down across my chest. I was nursing her, she choked a bit and I sat her up, but am almost positive that I stayed covered, or if I didn't it was only for a split second. Anyhow, I noticed that a gal who was with a baby, was staring me down. I went back to nursing baby girl, when a life guard came over and told me I couldn't do "that" here, and I needed to go nurse in the bathroom. :glare:

 

I said "nurse"

 

"Yes"

 

"Umm, do you realize it is illegal for you to ask me to do that"

 

"no"

 

"Well, it is"

 

"She said that I needed to go on and get in there because people thought it was gross."

 

"I looked around me, and said what about these people with their swim suit straps untied and the front hanging down and barely covering their ni**les?"

 

"They don't want tan lines"

 

"well, she doesn't want to eat in the bathroom where people poop and the toilet sprays it around 15 ft. We will go in there, when everyone eating and drinking out here comes in there to eat and drink in there with us"

 

"I think you and your family should leave now"

 

"I think you should get the manager, I will be here waiting"

 

Manager never showed up, baby finished, and then we packed up and left. When I got home, I called and talked to the manager, and they have a no bfing rule. I explained and stated the law, and emailed it to the recreation commission, the city leaders, and the water park. We will see what happens.

 

When I nurse in public, I try to wear clothing that keeps me covered, and I lay something near baby's face to help keep me covered. With my babies, I have found that a blanket is less discreet as they kick, fuss and yank off the breast to get away from it.

 

How can a mom not nurse pool side, but people can walk around with very little on? I mean there was a gal there and her top only has strings and about a 2.5-3 inch triangle covering her. It did not cover all of her "B" at all. :glare:

[Word Nerd]

I say other because while it doesn't bother me, I know it bothers a lot of people, and that bothers me. LOL It is the reason I didn't BF at all. I didn't want to be a prisoner in my own home. I didn't want to worry that someone might be offended. I didn't want people to insist I stick a blanket over my child's head. Who wants to eat with a blanket over their head (in 90 degree weather)? I guess I'm thoroughly disgusted by the fact this has to be discussed.

 

It really bothers me that it bothers people, too. It seems like such a non-issue to me, but I'm trying to understand where others who don't see it like I do are coming from.

[LibraryLover]

I wanted to tell Barbara Walters, 'How about you read a flight mag, or maybe look out the window".

Edited July 30, 2009 by LibraryLover

[Radish4ever]

I have no problem with women (including myself) feeding their babies in public. It's usually stressful and potentially mortifying enough without having to worry about others glaring at you for doing something completely appropriate and neccesary for your child.

I'm just as comfortable with someone whipping out a bottle as I am with someone attaching their child to their breast to feed them.

 

It's pretty rare for a woman to blatantly act inappropriately in feeding their child....we don't want you looking at our goods any more than you wanna see 'em ;)

[Loupelou]

I carry my license at all times.

 

http://www.dshs.state.tx.us/wichd/bf/pdf/13-06-10830.pdf

 

:lol::lol:Thanks!

[KingM]

I wonder if more women than men are bothered by another woman breastfeeding. That would be an interesting thing to find out.

 

That would be interesting. There have been times when I've shown up with you three year-old at story hour and a woman will suddenly grow more modest with her breastfeeding. This doesn't bother me, but neither do Vermont's more relaxed types bother me either. Whatever makes the mother and her baby most comfortable is fine with me.

 

I will note that when I've traveled in Latin America, women make no effort to prevent others from seeing their exposed breast while breast feeding. It can be a crowded bus and she will simply open her shirt and feed her baby. This culture is otherwise very conservative in dress and behavior, yet neither the mother, nor the other passengers think of this as being in any way immodest.

 

I admire that in their culture and wonder if the media in our culture has oversexualized the female breast, turned it into a much bigger deal than it should be.

 

Again, I think a woman should feed her baby in the way that makes her most comfortable, so I don't think covering the baby or even retiring to a private space is in any way inappropriate. Commenting on a woman's choice in the matter, a la the O'Reilly comment above, however, is beyond the pale.

[nmoira]

I used to have little cards to hand out to moms breastfeeding in public. Now I just thumbs up & say 'good for you!'

DD the Younger (weaned just this month) does it for me. She'll walk up to a nursing mom, beaming, and say "Your baby loves boo boo."

 

Edited to add: The "boo boo" part was her idea not mine. Not sure why... but I just need to say that. :)

[patchfire]

I have a feeling you are asking about a post I made on another forum. ;o)

 

If you are, here is a bit more information on the situation.

 

Our family went to a water park. We had all six of our children with us and our baby girl was hungry. I wore my nursing tankini--with swim skirt--top is two layers like a nursing top. ;o)

 

I am *Really* curious where you were and who owned the water park. A good friend of mine got asked to go to the "nursing room" at a water park locally, complained, and then the same week, a lifeguard did it to a friend of hers! My friend doesn't back down :D and got some results @ the local park, but I am curious now.

 

There's a whole rash of this. Sigh.

[KingM]

...

"She said that I needed to go on and get in there because people thought it was gross."

 

...

 

"well, she doesn't want to eat in the bathroom where people poop and the toilet sprays it around 15 ft. We will go in there, when everyone eating and drinking out here comes in there to eat and drink in there with us"

 

"I think you and your family should leave now"

 

 

Wow, just wow. Big thumbs up for standing your ground.

[Word Nerd]

Wow. There was a similar situation as yours at a lake in our area a few years ago. A female park ranger who was unfamiliar with our state's bfing laws actually ticketed a woman for indecent exposure for breastfeeding on the beach, even though she had a towel covering her and was also under an umbrella. The ticket was voided, but still.

 

I have a feeling you are asking about a post I made on another forum. ;o)

 

If you are, here is a bit more information on the situation.

 

Our family went to a water park. We had all six of our children with us and our baby girl was hungry. I wore my nursing tankini--with swim skirt--top is two layers like a nursing top. ;o)

 

I sat down to feed her wrapped a towel around my shoulders that draped down across my chest. I was nursing her, she choked a bit and I sat her up, but am almost positive that I stayed covered, or if I didn't it was only for a split second. Anyhow, I noticed that a gal who was with a baby, was staring me down. I went back to nursing baby girl, when a life guard came over and told me I couldn't do "that" here, and I needed to go nurse in the bathroom. :glare:

 

I said "nurse"

 

"Yes"

 

"Umm, do you realize it is illegal for you to ask me to do that"

 

"no"

 

"Well, it is"

 

"She said that I needed to go on and get in there because people thought it was gross."

 

"I looked around me, and said what about these people with their swim suit straps untied and the front hanging down and barely covering their ni**les?"

 

"They don't want tan lines"

 

"well, she doesn't want to eat in the bathroom where people poop and the toilet sprays it around 15 ft. We will go in there, when everyone eating and drinking out here comes in there to eat and drink in there with us"

 

"I think you and your family should leave now"

 

"I think you should get the manager, I will be here waiting"

 

Manager never showed up, baby finished, and then we packed up and left. When I got home, I called and talked to the manager, and they have a no bfing rule. I explained and stated the law, and emailed it to the recreation commission, the city leaders, and the water park. We will see what happens.

 

When I nurse in public, I try to wear clothing that keeps me covered, and I lay something near baby's face to help keep me covered. With my babies, I have found that a blanket is less discreet as they kick, fuss and yank off the breast to get away from it.

 

How can a mom not nurse pool side, but people can walk around with very little on? I mean there was a gal there and her top only has strings and about a 2.5-3 inch triangle covering her. It did not cover all of her "B" at all. :glare:

[Hillary in KS]

I always used a cover-up when nursing in public, out of consideration for others.

 

Nursing is natural and normal, however it was (and is) more important for me to be thoughtful of others than to make a point or a statement.

[JennC]

That would be interesting. There have been times when I've shown up with you three year-old at story hour and a woman will suddenly grow more modest with her breastfeeding. This doesn't bother me, but neither do Vermont's more relaxed types bother me either. Whatever makes the mother and her baby most comfortable is fine with me.

 

 

Thanks for your insight. I do the same thing - if a man enters the previously all-female vicinity. Funny thing is - I've never had a dirty look or rude comment from a MAN (teens maybe, bless their hearts). As a matter of fact my dh would probably think "How great that she bfing her baby and want to sit right by her just to show solidarity with her :D Seriously.

 

 

But *women* can be so judgmental. Many of them either have issues with not breastfeeding themselves, or with appearances, in such a way that they truly disdain me for being so, I don't know, backwards? Like the way our culture looks at women who don't shave, or do their hair, or wear makeup. Maybe where others live it is women who dress comfortably in ugly, modest dresses, or *gasp* carry their babies in slings or backpacks.

I am not too concerned about protecting a society who has a problem with the natural.

Any unnatural behavior at all, we are supposed to be fine with - gay, lesbian, bi, poly, random, etc. - don't question their 'rights' and we must teach our children to tolerate them. But a woman feeding her baby in the natural way - disgusting and uncomfortable for some. 'we should at least have a clause in the bf rights law that says she must use a blanket or something' WHAT?? (actual opinion from national news)

[SonshineLearner]

If I had it to do again, I'd get a belly hugger that looks like a tube top...for your middle. I didn't try to show people, but the baby was eating and if they looked they looked. I mean, here in a society, where offended or not there are cross dressers that hang it all out (my son asked our local theatre guy, "are you a man or a woman?" when he was 4, and got " a little of both.") and genders together that I personally don't agree with...and someone is bothered by a little b**b?? I just think it's crazy. We can argue all day if same genders should be together,(or lots of other differences) and to be honest, it will never bring all of us to the same agreement. BUT, look at a woman's "br**st" and look at what comes out...we all know that it's milk...and it's what babies need to survive... SO, it just makes sense that hungry or insecure baby gets what they want:-)

[Tap]

I have a friend who used to totally bare both breasts (F sized) and nurse for 30-40 minutes. I know her well and she is a bit of an exhibitionist. I say 'as long as they are discreet' because I think of this as a non-discreet mom.

 

I love to see women nursing babies, I nursed mine, but I do think they should be discreet. I don't think they need to be covered with anything more than the moms shirt, but I don't want to see the unused breast languishing for 30-40 minutes. A couple of minutes of a totally bared chest...no problem. I also don't think they need to move from any public area.

Edited July 28, 2009 by Tap, tap, tap

[calandalsmom]

I have a friend who used to totally bare both breasts (F sized) and nurse for 30-40 minutes. I know her well and she is a bit of an exhibitionist. I say 'as long as they are discrete' because I think of this as a non-discrete mom.

 

I love to see women nursing babies, I nursed mine, but I do think they should be discrete. I don't think they need to be covered with anything more than the moms shirt, but I don't want to see the unused breast languishing for 30-40 minutes. A couple of minutes of a totally bared chest...no problem. I also don't think they need to move from any public area.

 

in ten years of continuous nursing and attending LLL as well as many play groups and so on I have never seen such a thing but if I did Id probably laugh my head off. That is bizarre!

[johnandtinagilbert]

We nursed long all dc and participated in activities to encourage bfing, but I will go against the grain here and say, in public, I have not problem with covering. By public I mean places filled with strangers.

 

1. I don't really want anyone looking at my br&@$ts. And people stare, like it or not.

 

2. Although I find them off base, it does offend some, so why not have a little modesty (no throwing vegetables at me, please).

 

At home, no need to cover. The Gilbert Gang all understands what those things are for. My kids had to be taught not to comment on bottles b/c they thought they were weird.

 

At a get together with close friends, only if I knew they would not be offended, no cover, but in public with strangers, I find no reason not to cover.

 

As for the water park...that's so ridiculous! As if you can't see most of the rest of their bodies. RIDICULOUS! Bravo for standing ground!

[Orthodox6]

Covering up while nursing is perfectly normal for public -- in U.S. culture. The mothers at our church nurse in the back of the church (in the narthex), and always drape a light cover over the baby. Let's not turn this into something "weird" or "inhibited", please, because it is not.

[PineFarmMom]

Wow. I'm so sorry that happened at the water park. That is just wrong!!

 

No, I don't have a problem with women breastfeeding in public. If I do it myself, I do cover up because that is what makes me comfortable. I don't really have a problem with those who don't, though.

[Pamela H in Texas]

I would do my best to be discreet and I think modesty is generally important. But I'm not uncomfy with nursing or anything that happens in relation to it.

[JennC]

Covering up while nursing is perfectly normal for public -- in U.S. culture. The mothers at our church nurse in the back of the church (in the narthex), and always drape a light cover over the baby. Let's not turn this into something "weird" or "inhibited", please, because it is not.

 

I agree with you that cover up is not "weird" or "inhibited". I didn't mean to offend by saying that I didn't think it should be required. I guess for me, I tend to be very annoyed by the opinion that if you don't cover up, you are somehow deviant, or disrespectful, or rude, or repulsive, or . . .

There are many non-private places where I simply do what you do and find a quiet area and give my dc a restful drink.

I was really just referring to those times - amusement park watching 4 boys for instance, where that is not practical.

 

FTR - I never "let it all hang out" as one poster alluded to. That IMO is ridiculous and tacky - It's not about making a point - It is about feeding a baby, that's all.

[dirty ethel rackham]

I say other because while it doesn't bother me, I know it bothers a lot of people, and that bothers me. LOL It is the reason I didn't BF at all. I didn't want to be a prisoner in my own home. I didn't want to worry that someone might be offended. I didn't want people to insist I stick a blanket over my child's head. Who wants to eat with a blanket over their head (in 90 degree weather)? I guess I'm thoroughly disgusted by the fact this has to be discussed.

 

This is precisely what is wrong with our society ... that someone would chose NOT to breastfeed because of a wrongheaded, idiotic societal idea that using breasts for their natural, God-designed purpose is somehow more offensive than using them to sell cars and chicken wings. It pains me that a baby is deprived of the most appropriate food because of this ridiculous idea.

 

Several years ago, a mom was asked to cover up at our local swimming venue because she was discreetly nursing her baby. She pulled the "would you eat your lunch under a blanket in 90 degree weather?" card and reminded the park district police that she was abiding by the law. The officer continued to harass this mom, threatening a ticket and expulsion from the park. There was a big hullabaloo about this. Here is the letter to the editor I wrote about this:

 

 

 

I respectfully disagree with Naperville Park Board commissioner, XXXXXXX, regarding the nursing in public issue. She defended the actions of a park district police officer who threatened to give a ticket to a beach patron for nursing her child (Letter to the Editor, Naperville Sun, July 13, 2001). In her letter she stated, “Regardless of what one believes it is important to realize and appreciate other people’s sense of modesty. The police officer was simply trying to weigh this woman’s right with other Beach patrons’ sense of modesty.â€

 

 

 

This is not a modesty issue. It is a civil rights and public health issue. If this were about modesty, we would have a dress code specifying how much skin may be exposed by bathing attire. Typically, more skin is exposed by many swimsuits than while breastfeeding a baby. Also, as stated in the original article, breastfeeding is explicitly excluded from public indecency statutes. Mrs. XXXXXXX was not breaking any law. It is a baby’s civil right to be fed wherever he or she has a right to be.

 

 

 

From a public health standpoint, breastfeeding is important for the health of children. The government has set goals to improve breastfeeding rates in this country so that more babies are fed according to the guidelines set by the American Academy of Pediatrics. If we are to come anywhere close to meeting these goals, we need to make nursing mothers feel welcome to breastfeed their babies in public. One of the common obstacles to breastfeeding is the myth that it ties a mom down and keeps her from enjoying an active life outside the home. We need to change the perception that nursing is something best done behind closed doors. To help challenge that perception, as a nursing mother, I feel it is my civic duty to nurse in public … to be an agent of change.

 

 

 

I understand that, as commissioner, Mrs. xxxxxxx has a duty to the employees of the park district. She also has a duty to the patrons of park district facilities, young and old alike. As a civil servant, she has a duty to the greater good, that is, to help make breastfeeding welcome everywhere babies are.

 

 

 

(signature)

 

[Orthodox6]

Thanks ! I was worrying slightly that such a "drift" might evolve.

 

If I were at a friend's home, or at an all-women's gathering, I would feel fine with "somewhat exposed" nursing. I do draw the line at "exposed" nursing when boys and/or men are present, even young boys. That is where I have to insert modesty as a component. If I were travelling abroad, I would have to explain to my children that the concept of modesty can differ among cultures and religions.

 

I agree with you that cover up is not "weird" or "inhibited". I didn't mean to offend by saying that I didn't think it should be required. I guess for me, I tend to be very annoyed by the opinion that if you don't cover up, you are somehow deviant, or disrespectful, or rude, or repulsive, or . . .

There are many non-private places where I simply do what you do and find a quiet area and give my dc a restful drink.

I was really just referring to those times - amusement park watching 4 boys for instance, where that is not practical.

 

FTR - I never "let it all hang out" as one poster alluded to. That IMO is ridiculous and tacky - It's not about making a point - It is about feeding a baby, that's all.

[MomLovesClassics]

A few years ago a female newscaster complained about a woman she sat beside on a plane breastfeeding her baby. I can't recall right off hand because it was a few years ago. It was very judgemental the things she said. Just because a woman breasfeeds, does not mean she should stay home all the time. Somewhere along the line bottle feeding became popular, and people forgot the natural way for babies to eat.

[KidsHappen]

I'm an IBCLC and a retired LLL Leader; just stating my bias :D

 

I breastfed both mine for many years. And I raised them (ds & dd) to know what breasts are for.

 

The number of posters and anatomical drawings & textbooks around the house have immunized them against boobs. I can't imagine him staring because he wouldn't care. Or he'd give a thumbs up & start talking about how good it is blah, blah, blah.

 

I used to have little cards to hand out to moms breastfeeding in public. Now I just thumbs up & say 'good for you!'.

 

But then we've also gone to topless beach resorts etc & we're not bothered by nudity. The overt sexualization portrayed in pop culture - yes; nudity - no.

 

I need some of those cards! I have never seen them but I do frequently go up to women that I notice breastfeeding, always discretely, in public and tell them, "Good for you!"

[JennC]

A few years ago a female newscaster complained about a woman she sat beside on a plane breastfeeding her baby. I can't recall right off hand because it was a few years ago. It was very judgemental the things she said. Just because a woman breasfeeds, does not mean she should stay home all the time. Somewhere along the line bottle feeding became popular, and people forgot the natural way for babies to eat.

 

 

For our family it is somewhat the opposite. My children have never been fed with a bottle and so the little ones are always very curious about that bottle. :001_huh:

(I have been blessed as a stay at home mom who feels naturally comfortable feeding my babies where ever we are. I have never had to leave them - could have, just didn't want to - with anyone where they would miss a meal.)

[Veritaserum]

I agree with you that cover up is not "weird" or "inhibited". I didn't mean to offend by saying that I didn't think it should be required. I guess for me, I tend to be very annoyed by the opinion that if you don't cover up, you are somehow deviant, or disrespectful, or rude, or repulsive, or . . .

There are many non-private places where I simply do what you do and find a quiet area and give my dc a restful drink.

I was really just referring to those times - amusement park watching 4 boys for instance, where that is not practical.

 

FTR - I never "let it all hang out" as one poster alluded to. That IMO is ridiculous and tacky - It's not about making a point - It is about feeding a baby, that's all.

 

:iagree: Some babies tolerate a light drape, others do not. A screaming, hungry baby is probably going to be more of a distraction than the 2 cm of skin you might see if you look closely. ;) I don't breastfeed in public for political reasons. I feed my baby when and where she is hungry.

 

My dh lived in Argentina for a couple of years and said it was shocking at first to see women nursing without any attempt to be discreet, but that he got used to it after awhile and didn't really notice it anymore. I'd love to see breastfeeding become such a normal thing here that people don't really notice it. :)

[ThatCyndiGirl]

My babies would never tolerate being covered.

 

 

I was very discreet. The kid's mouth/cheek came right up to the edge of my shirt. No problem.

 

 

If someone said something to me I would have offered them a blanket to eat under.

[dirty ethel rackham]

My dh lived in Argentina for a couple of years and said it was shocking at first to see women nursing without any attempt to be discreet, but that he got used to it after awhile and didn't really notice it anymore. I'd love to see breastfeeding become such a normal thing here that people don't really notice it. :)

:iagree: Exactly!!!!!

To tell you the truth, the fact that we put the words "breastfeeding" and "modesty" in the same sentence disturbs me.

[Word Nerd]

I've used a full cover, used only a T-shirt and my arm or a burp cloth to minimize skin exposure, or gone into a different room entirely while nursing before, depending on the situation. I think women should do whatever makes them and their babies comfortable, and in my experience, most women are naturally discreet (discrete means separate or distinct :)) about breastfeeding. We may have different personal standards for what is appropriate while nursing in public, but it's still primarily an issue of health, not modesty. I don't really see it as an issue of modesty at all, but I understand why others do.

Edited July 28, 2009 by WordGirl

[Word Nerd]

Very well said! [standing ovation smilie]

 

This is precisely what is wrong with our society ... that someone would chose NOT to breastfeed because of a wrongheaded, idiotic societal idea that using breasts for their natural, God-designed purpose is somehow more offensive than using them to sell cars and chicken wings. It pains me that a baby is deprived of the most appropriate food because of this ridiculous idea.

 

Several years ago, a mom was asked to cover up at our local swimming venue because she was discreetly nursing her baby. She pulled the "would you eat your lunch under a blanket in 90 degree weather?" card and reminded the park district police that she was abiding by the law. The officer continued to harass this mom, threatening a ticket and expulsion from the park. There was a big hullabaloo about this. Here is the letter to the editor I wrote about this:

 

 

 

I respectfully disagree with Naperville Park Board commissioner, XXXXXXX, regarding the nursing in public issue. She defended the actions of a park district police officer who threatened to give a ticket to a beach patron for nursing her child (Letter to the Editor, Naperville Sun, July 13, 2001). In her letter she stated, “Regardless of what one believes it is important to realize and appreciate other people’s sense of modesty. The police officer was simply trying to weigh this woman’s right with other Beach patrons’ sense of modesty.â€

 

 

 

This is not a modesty issue. It is a civil rights and public health issue. If this were about modesty, we would have a dress code specifying how much skin may be exposed by bathing attire. Typically, more skin is exposed by many swimsuits than while breastfeeding a baby. Also, as stated in the original article, breastfeeding is explicitly excluded from public indecency statutes. Mrs. XXXXXXX was not breaking any law. It is a baby’s civil right to be fed wherever he or she has a right to be.

 

 

 

From a public health standpoint, breastfeeding is important for the health of children. The government has set goals to improve breastfeeding rates in this country so that more babies are fed according to the guidelines set by the American Academy of Pediatrics. If we are to come anywhere close to meeting these goals, we need to make nursing mothers feel welcome to breastfeed their babies in public. One of the common obstacles to breastfeeding is the myth that it ties a mom down and keeps her from enjoying an active life outside the home. We need to change the perception that nursing is something best done behind closed doors. To help challenge that perception, as a nursing mother, I feel it is my civic duty to nurse in public … to be an agent of change.

 

 

 

I understand that, as commissioner, Mrs. xxxxxxx has a duty to the employees of the park district. She also has a duty to the patrons of park district facilities, young and old alike. As a civil servant, she has a duty to the greater good, that is, to help make breastfeeding welcome everywhere babies are.

 

 

 

(signature)

 

[Orthodox6]

Sorry to read this. That's the kind of remark I was hoping would not come up in this useful discussion.

 

If someone said something to me I would have offered them a blanket to eat under.

Edited July 28, 2009 by Orthodox6

[Leah]

Sorry to read this. That's the kind of remark I was hoping would not come up in this useful discussion.

 

I don't take this to mean that it is wrong to use a blanket, but that it is out of line for others to make a woman feel like she NEEDS a blanket. I don't see why it is ok for someone to walk up to a woman breastfeeding and ask her to use a blanket...

[joannqn]

I'm just beginning my 7th year of breastfeeding, though it has been a while since I've needed to nurse in public.

 

This issue really bothers me. I've always nursed whenever and wherever I needed to. I never use a cover up but do try to make sure my shirt is pulled down but I don't make a big deal out of it. Cover ups fall down. Cover ups make it harder to latch the baby on because you can't easily see what you are doing. Cover ups can be hot. Cover ups are often less discrete because it can make the baby fuss....a lot.

 

I refuse to use a specific cover or blanket. My oldest was, and still is, very heat sensitive. She had to wear light clothing, even in the winter. One cool evening, I put her in a onesie and outfit to go to a church function. Within 10 minutes, she was fussy and covered in heat rash. My current newborn is living in a onesie only...anything more causes her temperature to go above 100 degrees. So, I can't use a cover, even if I wanted to.

 

Personally, I think this country needs to get over it. Those other countries who don't bat an eye over a mom feeding her baby have it right.