TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Perhaps it is just me, but I've seen several what I consider judgemental posts. Several of these carry the disclaimer "I'm just venting" as if to make them seem less judgemental. To me, venting is complaining about your mother in law bossing you around or your kids banging on the door constantly while you're trying to pee. Not knocking what someone is wearing at the pool or what a couple on tv does when shopping for a house. Is it semantics? Is there some other definition for venting? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OH_Homeschooler Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Ha, good question! I think "vent" can be code for "judgment" since no one thinks their own vents are judgmental. And honestly, I do find the thread about what to wear at a pool hurtful. That's my judgment, not a vent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Perhaps it is just me, but I've seen several what I consider judgemental posts. Several of these carry the disclaimer "I'm just venting" as if to make them seem less judgemental. To me, venting is complaining about your mother in law bossing you around or your kids banging on the door constantly while you're trying to pee. Not knocking what someone is wearing at the pool or what a couple on tv does when shopping for a house. Is it semantics? Is there some other definition for venting? IMNSHO, saying "I'm just venting" is a phrase some people use thinking that they are covering over what is really just a steaming pile of sanctimony. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ginevra Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 :lol: Good observation. I'm just venting, but my SIL looks better in her bikini than I do and she's had three kids, so I think she needs to go with a full-length "Swimming Costume" at next year's July 4th party, don't you agree? I'm just venting...:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 It's sort of like here in the south when people gossip and then say "Bless her heart". :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Sort of like the phrase, "with all due respect", huh? ;) One thinks one can get away with anything if it's prefaced, "with all due respect". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 IMNSHO, saying "I'm just venting" is a phrase some people use thinking that they are covering over what is really just a steaming pile of sanctimony. ITA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Author Share Posted July 6, 2009 Or what about - "Bless her heart..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Author Share Posted July 6, 2009 steaming pile of sanctimony. Ha haha hahahhahahha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loupelou Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 I suppose many of the posts can fall under the category of "venting" and/or "pet peeves". Complaining about your MIL is venting but isn't really a pet peeve, while expressing displeasure at the practice of wearing skimpy clothing to the pool falls under both. Both are judgment threads to some degree although I guess if it offends you just skip it (not saying this is your complaint at all). I guess everyone needs some feedback occasionally, listening ears, etc. This appears to be as good a place as any and no one seems reticent in expressing their opinions for or against.:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Author Share Posted July 6, 2009 Oops. I posted the same thing! Should have read through the replies first. Under your breath you can say "well bless her heart, she is a ding dong and posts before she reads" if you want to. I won't mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emmy Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 It's sort of like here in the south when people gossip and then say "Bless her heart". :D :smilielol5: I totally forgot about that phrase. Years ago I worked with a woman from the south that would use that phrase all the time and you just never knew what was going to follow it! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swimmermom3 Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 steaming pile of sanctimony.:lol::lol: Not that I'm being snarky...:001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtroad Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Any vent is a judgement (isn't it?)... you are ticked about something someone did that is NOT up to your standards or code of conduct... some things one person is comfortable with is really grossing the person next to them out... result... a vent of frustration, annoyance, or disgust. Once it is out of the system... they can move on.. haha. I don't read many... just the ones with unusual titles. I did read some of the mamas in bikinis.... some folks do need to revisit that issue... some are drop dead gorgeous. I would SCARE YOU! I wasn't offended. Judgement also lends to our sensitivities. Every opinioin or decision is a judgment. How far can I person express themselves without something bugging someone else? Not far. :chillpill:;) Just skip those titles... most surely, don't read all 4 pages before you exit... you might get addicted & want to continue! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Perhaps it is just me, but I've seen several what I consider judgemental posts. Several of these carry the disclaimer "I'm just venting" as if to make them seem less judgemental. To me, venting is complaining about your mother in law bossing you around or your kids banging on the door constantly while you're trying to pee. Not knocking what someone is wearing at the pool or what a couple on tv does when shopping for a house. Is it semantics? Is there some other definition for venting? -not sure how your post is less judgemental?:confused: Doesn't it kind of fall under the same category? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 Oops. I posted the same thing! Should have read through the replies first. Under your breath you can say "well bless her heart, she is a ding dong and posts before she reads" if you want to. I won't mind. Well I am from the South! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Author Share Posted July 6, 2009 -not sure how your post is less judgemental?:confused: Doesn't it kind of fall under the same category? Yes, I suppose it does in that I was judging people on the use of "I'm just venting" to soften the blow of judgement, but part of my post was genuine curiousity as to the term "vent". What is a vent and what is judgement? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nestof3 Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 What is wrong with judging whether something is right, beneficial, detrimental, negative, etc? I am free to disagree with the person, and others are free to disagree with me. Who cares? Why do people feel so threatened when others disagree with them? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 What is wrong with judging whether something is right, beneficial, detrimental, negative, etc? I am free to disagree with the person, and others are free to disagree with me. Who cares? Why do people feel so threatened when others disagree with them? I agree. I find it rather humorous when someone posts a vent or pet peeve and people jump all over it, with their own judgments of the OP for venting! The bikini thread comes to mind.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwinMominTX Posted July 6, 2009 Author Share Posted July 6, 2009 I guess my judgement was in the use of the words..."I'm just venting". It seems rather passive aggressive to me. Call a spade a spade. Call a judgement a judgement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaT Posted July 6, 2009 Share Posted July 6, 2009 It's kind of like my mil's opening phrase, "I don't mean to be ugly, but . . ." Of course she means to be ugly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 IMNSHO, saying "I'm just venting" is a phrase some people use thinking that they are covering over what is really just a steaming pile of sanctimony. :lol::lol::lol: YOu have such a way with words :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMe Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Perhaps it is just me, but I've seen several what I consider judgemental posts. Several of these carry the disclaimer "I'm just venting" as if to make them seem less judgemental. To me, venting is complaining about your mother in law bossing you around or your kids banging on the door constantly while you're trying to pee. Not knocking what someone is wearing at the pool or what a couple on tv does when shopping for a house. Is it semantics? Is there some other definition for venting? I certainly would assume that you're not being judgemental and speaking of my post I started: http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=111496 Since I know you're against being judgemental, I'm sure you're not talking about my post being judgemental. Unless of course you are being judgemental.:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrappyhappymama Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 What is wrong with judging whether something is right, beneficial, detrimental, negative, etc? I am free to disagree with the person, and others are free to disagree with me. Who cares? Why do people feel so threatened when others disagree with them? Yes, I agree here. So, sometimes folks venting about things that I feel are no big deal can be a little tedious. Yes, sometimes judgmental and even sanctimonious come to mind. It seems like the line is: it's venting if I agree and judgment if I don't. But honestly, I really tire of the idea that folks should only be judgmental about things that are commonly accepted and should only feel free to voice those judgments aloud if most people will agree with them. Why get worked up about someone's stricter code of morality or someone else's looser one? There's room enough on the board for diverse viewpoints I think, and sometimes (gasp!) I even find myself enlightened by someone's perspective that I would never have been likely to encounter otherwise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 I guess my judgement was in the use of the words..."I'm just venting". It seems rather passive aggressive to me. Call a spade a spade. Call a judgement a judgement. Well, "I'm just venting" is seen softer than "I hate..." which another thread discussed. As a child, I was taught that if I didn't have anything polite to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. I was taught to guard my tongue. The internet has brought about an anonymity that allows someone to speak from their thoughts without it truly passing their lips. And yes, I'm guilty of this as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 It's kind of like my mil's opening phrase, "I don't mean to be ugly, but . . ." Of course she means to be ugly. Yes, I've been around people who say "I don't mean to say anything bad, but..." or "I don't mean to sound snarky, but..." Then why say it? :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Is it semantics? Is there some other definition for venting? I think you are mixing up rant and vent. Vent is "I can't take it anymore" and rant is "This is so wrong/stupid/wasteful/etc I can't stand it anymore". Vents may have judgments, but rants, to me, always do. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marylou Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Well, "I'm just venting" is seen softer than "I hate..." which another thread discussed. As a child, I was taught that if I didn't have anything polite to say, I shouldn't say anything at all. I was taught to guard my tongue. The internet has brought about an anonymity that allows someone to speak from their thoughts without it truly passing their lips. And yes, I'm guilty of this as well. This nails it :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marylou Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Yes, I've been around people who say "I don't mean to say anything bad, but..." or "I don't mean to sound snarky, but..." Then why say it? :D You should be a forum moderator :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 IMNSHO, saying "I'm just venting" is a phrase some people use thinking that they are covering over what is really just a steaming pile of sanctimony. Oh, that is priceless!:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillary in KS Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Oh, that is priceless!:D Elaine, I am saddened to see your obvious enjoyment of steaming piles of sanctimony. I was hurt, at first, to learn of this. And then I realized that you simply are ignorant and do not know any better. And so - I forgive you. But, I'm still saddened. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Elaine, I am saddened to see your obvious enjoyment of steaming piles of sanctimony. I was hurt, at first, to learn of this. And then I realized that you simply are ignorant and do not know any better. And so - I forgive you. But, I'm still saddened. :D Bless your heart! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5kidsforME Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Elaine, I am saddened to see your obvious enjoyment of steaming piles of sanctimony. I was hurt, at first, to learn of this. And then I realized that you simply are ignorant and do not know any better. And so - I forgive you. But, I'm still saddened. :D :001_huh: No, you didn't.............no......:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillary in KS Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Bless your heart! :glare: :lol: Mrs. Mungo, that was great! I'm still laughing. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 :glare: :lol: Mrs. Mungo, that was great! I'm still laughing. :D When I first read the post that this was referencing...and thought..."Oh my gosh....is she serious?" And then I saw the smilies. Smilies...they make ALL the difference:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillary in KS Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 When I first read the post that this was referencing...and thought..."Oh my gosh....is she serious?" And then I saw the smilies. Smilies...they make ALL the difference:D :D They really do, don't they? :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle My Bell Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Isn't a vent something on a chicken's bum? :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgiana Daniels Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 I'm new, and reallllly enjoy the diversity of opinion on this board. Seriously, if we all thought the same then some of us wouldn't be necessary:tongue_smilie: All this to say: **True Confession Alert** I kinda like the vent threads ((ducking to avoid the tomatoes)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Isn't a vent something on a chicken's bum? :tongue_smilie: No, I believe those are what some restaurants call 'nuggets'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swimmermom3 Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 No, I believe those are what some restaurants call 'nuggets'. My youngest adores chicken nuggets. I am now seriously concerned about the boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathy in MD Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Isn't a vent something on a chicken's bum? :tongue_smilie: do you know what you've just done to all future vent posts? I don't think I'll ever be able to look at one the same way now. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 No, I believe those are what some restaurants call 'nuggets'. :smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 A vent is personal. Blowing off steam. The swimsuit thread was not a vent. A vent is accompanied by high blood pressure and a throbbing temple; a judgement with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. That is how you can tell the difference. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee in NC Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 What is wrong with judging whether something is right, beneficial, detrimental, negative, etc? I am free to disagree with the person, and others are free to disagree with me. Who cares? Why do people feel so threatened when others disagree with them? I think it is wrong when you go onto a message board and gossip about the things people you know in real life do that you don't agree with. It is one thing to disagree with someone that is actually here for you to disagree with, but a different story when they are not able to defend themselves, clarify their choices/positions, etc. I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me and the choices I make in life, but I would be hurt if someone I know IRL were to go on a message board and tell everyone (even if no identifying details are given) about my life and the things that I do that they don't agree with. "I think that xyz is wrong" is not a problem. "There are these people I know IRL who do xyz and these are the details of their lives and they are so wrong, don't you agree?" is a BIG problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 No, I believe those are what some restaurants call 'nuggets'. ACK!:ack2::ack2: Eww... that vision will never leave my head when I see chicken nuggets now. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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