ProudGrandma Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 So, I am trying to come up with an idea for my 95 year old father-in-law. He basically doesn't do anything anymore....he and (my MIL) are basically shut-in except for doctor's appointments and maybe church. He sleeps a lot. But we don't want to go visit with nothing in hand and we have gifts for my MIL. His daughter bought him several pairs of PJ's (he rarely gets dressed anymore....because he sleeps so much). We toyed with one of those digital picture frames, but they don't have wi-fi and realistically nobody will periodically reload it with new pictures. We looked at subscription boxes but there is nothing there for him....and they are expensive. He only read the paper (if that) and watches a few sports on TV...but only if the game is on when he is awake. We could get gift cards to restaurants as they still go out to eat...but we do that a lot as a "last resort" gift... Please help us. Just for frame of reference....we got a monthly flowered to be delivered to my MIL, as well as a few books to read and some puzzle books. So we aren't looking for huge things...just something. Thanks for your ideas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alicia64 Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 If he was into music: load an ipod-like thing up with headphones. Same if he was a big reader. I think something as nice as a really quality pillow or beautiful blanket would be awesome too. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Lap blanket Donut-shaped pillow Ottoman to prop up feet Nice plant Framed group photo Box of snacks Home-baked muffins for the freezer Lotion for dry hands New handkerchiefs (a lot of elderly seem to like using these or keeping one in the pocket) 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Also small photo album of all the people he loves 5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grace Hopper Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Does he have an organized place on the table next to his favorite chair for things like his glasses, phone, tv remote? 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BusyMom5 Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 I do think good food is one of the biggest obstacles for elderly, so I'd go with restaurant.gift cards and a small snack or homemade meal. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amoret Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Smartwool or other nice socks or slippers High quality, large bath towels Flannel shirts, which can be worn as over shirts if he gets cold 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WendyLady Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 A food snack basket either premade or personalized with his favorites is my go-to for my father in law. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 We got my grandmother a gift certificate for where she gets her hair cut. If he has a favorite barber (and has hair 😉), that might be an option. If he still shaves, maybe nice razors or an electric razor (or replacement blades). A box of favorite care items of some sort might be appreciated. And I agree that anytime you can get old people to eat real food, go for the means to make that happen, including restaurant gift cards. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Since he likes the paper, would he like a magazine subscription? Or another newspaper from a different source ? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 Watermelon That's what my FIL wanted at that stage. Just some fruit that tastes good to eat. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drama Llama Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 If one picture in a frame that never changes can be a gift, I don't see why a digital frame with a bunch of pictures that never change can't be a gift. I agree about favorite foods being a good gift. Blanket from his favorite sports team Since church seems important -- is there something there? My church always has some kind of "pay X and get your name on a brick!" or something going on. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Tick Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 10 minutes ago, Drama Llama said: If one picture in a frame that never changes can be a gift, I don't see why a digital frame with a bunch of pictures that never change can't be a gift. This reasoning makes sense to me. What's about a Lava Lamp? Peaceful to watch, quiet, could be a night light, adds a sense of whimsy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 (edited) My dad died last year at 94 and lived like they do. He liked pistachios, (a bag of mixed nuts with a nutcracker set?), chocolate covered cherries, Sodoku puzzle books, lottery tickets (one of us girls would cash them in for him). We also got the local newspaper, Readers Digest /Guideposts /(pick your favorite) magazine subscription so there'd be something in the mail besides bills. Coffee table books on a topic he loves. Mostly he liked spending time together. We played a lot of card games over the years! A favorite beverage?? And I know they'd share it, but fruit of the month boxes? Edited December 14, 2023 by Tina addition 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted December 14, 2023 Author Share Posted December 14, 2023 Just now, Tina said: My dad died last year at 94 and lived like they do. He liked pistachios, (a bag of mixed nuts with a nutcracker set?), chocolate covered cherries, Sodoku puzzle books, lottery tickets (one of us girls would cash them in for him). We also got the local newspaper, Readers Digest /Guideposts /(pick your favorite) magazine subscription so there'd be something in the mail besides bills. Coffee table books on a topic he loves. Mostly he liked spending time together. We played a lot of card games over the years! A favorite beverage?? so sorry to hear about your dad. I lost my dad 1 1/2 years ago and my father in law is probably not far behind. Thanks for these ideas. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frances Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 4 hours ago, PeterPan said: Watermelon That's what my FIL wanted at that stage. Just some fruit that tastes good to eat. Since you got monthly flower delivery for MIL, you could look at monthly fruit delivery for FIL. Harry and David is one company that does it. Everyone who we give pears to from there loves them. And they will replace any item that isn’t as good as it should be. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purpleowl Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 I was going to mention Harry & David pears - that's what we always gave DH's grandmother and she loved them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 My dad is 95 and is nearing the end but still fighting. He'd enjoy: new slippers, warm socks, food he could easily snack on throughout the day, a recent photo of people he loves in a frame that he can easily see. If he's in good enough health to read, my kids have yearly given my dad a subscription to this: https://www.famileo.com/famileo/en-US/ It's a monthly newsletter. Everyone who is in on it gets to upload a photo or two with a short caption every month to a site online. I think there's enough room for 24 or so photos with captions. One printed copy is then made and sent to the recipient. It's a nice quality paper with large photos. We did this throughout the pandemic with my dad, every month. It's become a little harder for him to enjoy it of late, but he really loved it for a few years. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookbard Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 The one gift my mother in law loved, really loved, was a book about herself through a company called Storyworth. They would email her a question once a month (and you could edit which questions so they are appropriate) and she would answer them. You can edit the response and add photos, and then they will print it out as a book. You get a pdf to check over before it prints, which is great so you can send it off to other relatives. I can't emphasise how much she loved it! She showed it off to everyone. Other than that, I vote for a lovely soft blanket. I would not get the digital frame. I've seen a number of elderly people get them and they just get pushed aside. Personally with my mother in law we tried not to get give too much 'stuff' as we knew it wouldn't be long before it got returned to us. She was in aged care at that point. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 actual food items. favorite cookies nuts candy snacks comfortable pillow/cushion/throw etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 A calendar that you make up at Shutterfly or such with family pictures. My dad would then write everyone's birthday, etc. on the calendar. They refer to a calendar for their appointments, too! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
almondbutterandjelly Posted December 15, 2023 Share Posted December 15, 2023 This year, the various family members are getting the following for my 82 year old father in assisted living: Monogrammed (with First initial and last name) bath towels, Monogrammed blanket, a world map to track the travels of relatives, and a state map with highways to discuss routes and locations of cities within driving distance, and a magnifying page to use with the state map. HTH 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whitestavern Posted December 16, 2023 Share Posted December 16, 2023 Have not read all the replies but perhaps Story Worth. https://welcome.storyworth.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrips Posted December 16, 2023 Share Posted December 16, 2023 (edited) My elderly dad always wanted candy and ice cream. I think a lot of food tastes bland as they age, so the sweets still tasted good. He also used to like those small handheld poker games or solitaire. 80s era simple electronics, just push a button. Edited December 16, 2023 by matrips Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted December 16, 2023 Share Posted December 16, 2023 My Dad is 96. He love oranges from my tree (not in season right now though), which are sweeter and more complex in flavor than the underripe navel oranges available in stores, and especially CDs of Big Band music. His favorites are Benny Goodman, Tommy Dorsey, and Jimmy Dorsey. Also DVDs of old movies from that era—White Christmas, The Tommy Dorsey Story, It’s a Wonderful Life, the older Miracle on 34th Street, and Casablanca. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted December 16, 2023 Author Share Posted December 16, 2023 You guys are great. Your ideas are keepers....many for my mom or my MIL too... this is what we decided on: a pair of "grandpa" socks and a "grandpa" t-shirt (world's best grandpa kind of thing) and then I am going to make a variety of snack mixes for him...some sweet and some savory. He doesn't have any doctor imposed diet...although my MIL doesn't want him to eat too many sweets (although he eats ice cream every night) lol. thanks again for all of your help!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted December 16, 2023 Share Posted December 16, 2023 waxed amarylis bulbs are great - they do not need water but just grow and bloom and make January and February less dreary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanabug Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 New house slippers One of those tools to help elderly put on their socks - My dad can hardly bend over to put socks on and this is something I want to get him. A magnifying glass - they make ones that are lighted as well as ones large enough for a whole page at once. My grandma loved hers! Gift certificates for a monthly pedicure, maybe in-home? Many elderly have a hard time maintaining foot health. Pajamas since he sleeps a lot Elderly are often cold, what about a heated throw blanket? A window bird feeder Large dot dominoes or deck of cards Graeter's ice cream - you can choose a gift box of 6 or so pints to be mailed directly. I did this for our neighbors one year and they loved it! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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