Kari C in SC Posted May 16, 2015 Author Share Posted May 16, 2015 Oh honey, I remember your original post. No one can take his place but I'm glad you're finding comfort in the memories you made with him! Is that his picture? What a nice looking boy! Hugs to you, Kari! Yes, that is him when he was on a road trip I'm Alaska. Thank you. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kari C in SC Posted May 16, 2015 Author Share Posted May 16, 2015 Kari, thank you so much for sharing this part of you, this story that no mom should have be a part of her tapestry. I do not think you were cowardly for not viewing your son's injuries. These are decisions we never expect to have to make. There were decisions when my baby girl died that I questioned; my older children, who were then five and three, never saw Lydia. I did not have them come to the hospital to see their dead baby sister. Was I wrong? I don't know, but this was not what I wanted them to picture when they thought about the sister they never got to know. I don't know if it was best, but I wanted to protect my living kids from as much of the horror as I could and that was what I chose. (((Hugs))) that hole will never go away, but I pray that you may fill it up with little bits of joy until you can see Timmy again. I have run out of likes for the day. Thank you for sharing. You know exactly how questioning everything becomes a part of us. My mom always says you do the best you can and that is all you can do. I feel like I can finally think more this way now. It has been baby steps. To everyone that shared kind words, thank you. I find writing to be healing, but then I also have run away from it. I am trying to stop running so much and just live. I feel like I am finally making a bit of progress. Your kindness is appreciated more than anything I could write! 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 I'm so very, very sorry. My heart goes out to you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 I have no words, I am so sorry. I remember when the accident happened and I appreciate you updating us now and then on how you are doing. :grouphug: :grouphug: 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 I remember the day you first posted about this. Thank you for sharing more of your story and I pray for continued healing for you and your family. May Timmy's life and memory bring joy to you and everyone who knew him! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 (((((Hugs))))) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 That is a powerful, brave blog post. It was overwhelming to read, but I am so glad to have been able to read it. Sending you many healing thoughts. It is good for all of us to get shaken up out of our petty concerns, and posts like this certainly make the important priorities clear. :grouphug: 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Another Lynn Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 :grouphug: Kari, I remember. And I think of Timmy every time I see you here. :grouphug: 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onceuponatime Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 Hugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: I remember too. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 I didn't read your blog entry until this morning. I sobbed the entire way through. I am so sorry for your pain. And I think you are very very brave in every way. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoPlaceLikeHome Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I remember that day and how heartbreaking it was. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isabella Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 I've been thinking of you recently, knowing the anniversary of your son's passing was coming up in May. Many hugs for you and your family. Thank you for your amazingly honest blog post. I wept reading it, because your raw grief came flowing through your words in a powerful way. I'm glad you have some joy in your life again, too, in spite of the empty hole Timmy left. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merry gardens Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 Prayers and condolences for you. Your blog touched me deeply. My oldest baby is a soldier. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie in VA Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 Tears and hugs. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: And more tears. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2scouts Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 :crying: ((hugs)) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idnib Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 :crying: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 I also remember. So much love to you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StaceyinLA Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 The blog post was so raw and honest; it had me in tears. I am glad you are able to have joy in your lives (and I love your daughter's tattoo). You're in my thoughts and prayers. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 Kari, Did you finally determine who the girl was to Tim? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 I remember too, Kari. Your post was beautiful. Love to your family! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kari C in SC Posted May 20, 2015 Author Share Posted May 20, 2015 Kari, Did you finally determine who the girl was to Tim? Yes, we did learn more about her from his friends and fellow soldiers. She was a just turned 18 year old girl that they had met while on an Easter weekend road trip from Fairbanks to Anchorage. She was coming up for the weekend to hang out with a mutual friend. She had just gotten her permit 2 weeks prior to the accident and was driving a car that was not registered to her, nor did she have insurance. She had been pulled over for speeding earlier that week and ticketed for driving without a license and insurance. The night of the accident she was pulled over for speeding again. She called my son and another soldier. They went to meet her and the office released her with my son driving. About 25 minutes later, they stopped at a scenic overlook and took a selfie. I assume she went back to the drivers seat because 20 minutes later she was doing 85 in a 55 when she came up on a car that had just entered the roadway she tried to correct and went head on into the semi killing them both. The officer that released her was brought to the scene. It is my understanding that according to Alaska law, her car should have been impounded with each of the citations, but Alaska doesn't enforce it. Would of, should of, could of doesn't matter at the end of the day. Thanks again for all the kind words. I really do appreciate all of them! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 Yes, we did learn more about her from his friends and fellow soldiers. She was a just turned 18 year old girl that they had met while on an Easter weekend road trip from Fairbanks to Anchorage. She was coming up for the weekend to hang out with a mutual friend. She had just gotten her permit 2 weeks prior to the accident and was driving a car that was not registered to her, nor did she have insurance. She had been pulled over for speeding earlier that week and ticketed for driving without a license and insurance. The night of the accident she was pulled over for speeding again. She called my son and another soldier. They went to meet her and the office released her with my son driving. About 25 minutes later, they stopped at a scenic overlook and took a selfie. I assume she went back to the drivers seat because 20 minutes later she was doing 85 in a 55 when she came up on a car that had just entered the roadway she tried to correct and went head on into the semi killing them both. The officer that released her was brought to the scene. It is my understanding that according to Alaska law, her car should have been impounded with each of the citations, but Alaska doesn't enforce it. Would of, should of, could of doesn't matter at the end of the day. Thanks again for all the kind words. I really do appreciate all of them! Oh wow. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
readwithem Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 Hugs to you and your family. We aren't meant to bury our children. I remember your story vividly. I loved reading your blog and I love that you bought houses for your children. I have a warm fuzzy feeling just thinking about them living close to you. And that's amazing that you've had the same tenants for four years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 Yes, we did learn more about her from his friends and fellow soldiers. She was a just turned 18 year old girl that they had met while on an Easter weekend road trip from Fairbanks to Anchorage. She was coming up for the weekend to hang out with a mutual friend. She had just gotten her permit 2 weeks prior to the accident and was driving a car that was not registered to her, nor did she have insurance. She had been pulled over for speeding earlier that week and ticketed for driving without a license and insurance. The night of the accident she was pulled over for speeding again. She called my son and another soldier. They went to meet her and the office released her with my son driving. About 25 minutes later, they stopped at a scenic overlook and took a selfie. I assume she went back to the drivers seat because 20 minutes later she was doing 85 in a 55 when she came up on a car that had just entered the roadway she tried to correct and went head on into the semi killing them both. The officer that released her was brought to the scene. It is my understanding that according to Alaska law, her car should have been impounded with each of the citations, but Alaska doesn't enforce it. Would of, should of, could of doesn't matter at the end of the day. Thanks again for all the kind words. I really do appreciate all of them! Kari, my heart breaks reading this. I knew the girl was young and inexperienced from previous posts, but I did not know she was "getting away with" breaking so many rules. Not to turn this into my soapbox, but this is one reason I am in favor of kids getting their licenses and driving experience as early as allowable, and driving extensively with parental supervision before they start driving alone. (((More hugs)))) because it just adds to the senselessness. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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