Ottakee Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 I just saw an ad for DOGGY daycare----meaning taking care of your dog for 9 hours a day and it was $7 per day MORE than we get for a foster child.........a child that we care for 24 hours a day (yes they do go to school though), clothe, feed, transport, entertain, and pay for things they need. Â Day care rates for a 9 hour day for a school age child is $30-40/day compared to the $17.24 a day the state pays for a foster child. Â Something is wrong here. Â Just my rant for the day. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Well, some foster parents actually DO foster for the money.  I had to live with one for a year as a teenager.  Believe me, you haven't had a sucky living situation until you've shared ten square feet of a freezing concrete bedroom in the basement with three other teenagers. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 11, 2015 Author Share Posted February 11, 2015 Well, some foster parents actually DO foster for the money.  I had to live with one for a year as a teenager.  Believe me, you haven't had a sucky living situation until you've shared ten square feet of a freezing concrete bedroom in the basement with three other teenagers. :glare: Sorry to hear that.  I know it wouldn't happen here now.  Our kids have to have 40 sq feet per child.  Actually in our house our fosters get their own bedroom and semi private bath and a play area to claim as their own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Sorry to hear that. Â I know it wouldn't happen here now. Â Our kids have to have 40 sq feet per child. Â Actually in our house our fosters get their own bedroom and semi private bath and a play area to claim as their own. Â Yeah, this was in a small town back in the nineties. Â The foster parents and the SWs were all friends and a lot of things were, let's say, overlooked. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 The franchise owner of the little gym my kids went to have a daughter who is a foster mum, single and no kids of her own. The owner say that's the lifestyle her daughter prefers  Rates vary quite a bit by states. I was looking at this 2012 report on the rates as I heard a much higher rate for California. Someone we know is fostering a single mom with a toddler.  http://www.childtrends.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Foster-Care-Payment-Rate-Report.pdf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elisabet1 Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 Yeah, this was in a small town back in the nineties. Â The foster parents and the SWs were all friends and a lot of things were, let's say, overlooked. Â I thought I was the only person on the board who had been in foster care. Â I heard from others about horrible situations they were in. Some foster parents are saints. But some are not and really do mistreat the foster kids.I was beyond lucky, and I knew it. Most teen foster kids I met had been in bad situations in their other foster homes. I still am in contact with my foster parents and foster sisters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 We have some very good local charities specifically for foster kids. Â I try to donate when I can. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 11, 2015 Share Posted February 11, 2015 I thought I was the only person on the board who had been in foster care. Â I heard from others about horrible situations they were in. Some foster parents are saints. But some are not and really do mistreat the foster kids.I was beyond lucky, and I knew it. Most teen foster kids I met had been in bad situations in their other foster homes. I still am in contact with my foster parents and foster sisters. Â There were definitely kids who had it worse than me, and those who had it better. Â We weren't physically abused or anything like that, but we were basically stored in a basement "bedroom" (which I think was actually a storage closet) until something needed to be cleaned or one of their bio kids needed someone to do their homework for them. Â The best part was that they even got extra money because it was supposed to be a "therapeutic" foster home that was extra gentle and helped us work out mental health issues and stuff. Â Yeah, right. Â Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Yep. It is pretty ridiculous what they expect fosterparents to pay for out of their own pockets. On top of that, In our state if you are related in the slightest to the child you get zero foster dollars. They say family should take care of family....for free. I am related to dd8 by a 16th. She is my half sisters daughter's, daughter. I am estranged from my family because I refuse to live in their craziness. That is why they asked me to take her because I wasn't really part of my family. But legally we share some distant blood so we get to foot the whole bill of raising someone else's child. Â We did some legal leg work and at least got a tanf grant for her so she gets between $240 and 300 a month. $8 to $10 a day for a heavily special needs child. If I weren't related to her, her special needs foster payment would be over $600 which is still less than it costs me to raise her. Â No wonder so few families step up to take in family foster kids. Your bound by the laws of the state and have foot the entire bill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Here the base rate is very low, but if you have a high needs child the amount goes up . I know a foster family that makes sure the children have high needs by only providing the bare minimum to survive and no stimulation at all.. resulting in children with serious delays, who are assessed as high needs, adding up to more income for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Here the base rate is very low, but if you have a high needs child the amount goes up . I know a foster family that makes sure the children have high needs by only providing the bare minimum to survive and no stimulation at all.. resulting in children with serious delays, who are assessed as high needs, adding up to more income for them. We received an emergency placement of a child who had been in a situation like this. It is despicable to take a perfectly healthy newborn, place him in a crib, prop up his bottles, never cuddle or hold him, or help him to develop normally. The little guy we had was two weeks away from his first birthday. He could not sit up, roll over, grasp anything, or pull his hand out if it was tucked under his leg. He weighed about 23 lbs and was completely dead weight. We were not able to keep him long-term, but within the two months he was with us, he learned how to sit up, and was gaining in overall muscle tone. Â I hope you have reported these people for child abuse/neglect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 12, 2015 Author Share Posted February 12, 2015 Here the base rate is very low, but if you have a high needs child the amount goes up . I know a foster family that makes sure the children have high needs by only providing the bare minimum to survive and no stimulation at all.. resulting in children with serious delays, who are assessed as high needs, adding up to more income for them. They have that here too in Michigan but more needs, means more care, more driving, more appointments, etc.  Our foster boy is a great kid but 3 days a week now he has appointments in another city.  We live in one, he goes to school in a second, and appointments in a 3rd so each trip (since I have to get him from school to make appointment times) is about 45 miles plus my time driving and waiting.  We try very hard to treat our foster kids the same as our bio kids (taking into age/development, etc. into consideration).  He is signed up to go to a YMCA lock in, hoping to do summer camp, signed up for a track/mentoring program at school, etc.  I just find it sad that doggy day care pays more than foster care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawthorne44 Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 I don't really know that you can compare the two though.  Doggy day care is an extreme luxury item.  As a luxury item it will naturally be more expensive.  The same way pool toys are more expensive than bath toys.  Wedding stuff is more expensive than non-wedding version of the same stuff.  What I remember, though, was when my BF went to Australia for 3 weeks.  She mentioned offhand before the trip how much she would be spending on hotels.  I'd known how much the dog boarding place was charging her per day, and I did some math.  Yes, the dog boarding was going to cost more than her hotels.  You might think she was staying in rat traps, but she wasn't.  That was the only boarding place that would take a dog for that long.  The others automatically considered a dog abandoned after two weeks, regardless of the reservation.  The pet boarding place was a hoity-toity one, and charged hoity-toity prices.   I get what you are saying, though.    Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 I know every state (and sometimes agency) varies. Â We can't foster non-relatives due to space (were told we could possibly get a waiver for relatives) but I've run the numbers and know it would definitely cost us money to foster. Â It *might* cover the very basic of the basics, but that's not how our household operates, that's not how we raise our kids, and it's NOT how I would want to care for children who are already lacking in the most essential area of child/personhood. Â The money issue is awful. Â My mother works for an agency and spends a lot of her own time and money to try to give the kids and foster parents special events and opportunities, and she's constantly seeking grants, writing proposals, and hounding donors. Â I wish there were more people like her. Â ETA: By "special", I mean "normal" by most standards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer132 Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Here the base rate is very low, but if you have a high needs child the amount goes up . I know a foster family that makes sure the children have high needs by only providing the bare minimum to survive and no stimulation at all.. resulting in children with serious delays, who are assessed as high needs, adding up to more income for them. I really don't understand how this goes on. When we fostered, we had SW in our home at LEAST twice a month, plus therapists twice a week, plus many doctor visits and at least weekly supervised visits with bios. It always baffles me how foster parents can get away with neglect or abuse when the state is almost living in your home with you!?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alessandra Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Well, some foster parents actually DO foster for the money. I had to live with one for a year as a teenager. Believe me, you haven't had a sucky living situation until you've shared ten square feet of a freezing concrete bedroom in the basement with three other teenagers. :glare: I'm sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plink Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Mergath, your story hurts my heart. Â I hate that there are evil people out there who treat child-rearing as a moneymaking scheme. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Mergath, your story hurts my heart. I hate that there are evil people out there who treat child-rearing as a moneymaking scheme. Thankfully I was only there for a year. I know other kids who were there for half their childhoods, though. It was heartbreaking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 They have that here too in Michigan but more needs, means more care, more driving, more appointments, etc.  Our foster boy is a great kid but 3 days a week now he has appointments in another city.  We live in one, he goes to school in a second, and appointments in a 3rd so each trip (since I have to get him from school to make appointment times) is about 45 miles plus my time driving and waiting.  We try very hard to treat our foster kids the same as our bio kids (taking into age/development, etc. into consideration).  He is signed up to go to a YMCA lock in, hoping to do summer camp, signed up for a track/mentoring program at school, etc.  I just find it sad that doggy day care pays more than foster care. This is the saddest part for me.  Even our caseworker told me that foster kids who are placed due to neglect, need more of everything than a non-foster.  They are in the system for a multitude of reasons and they are behind in many ways.  Or there are kids like our daughter, who was taken at birth, but is drug affected, so she will never have a normal functioning brain.  But they give the families so little financial resources to get them the help they need.  They need extensive services.  They need extensive time invested into them. The need extra help in school. They need protection.  They need protecting from. They need basic needs met. They need clothes to fit in the right social groups. They need luxuries. They need sports. They need family vacations. They need an advocate to fight with the state over thing like insurance, therapy, and medications. .....The need is just so great!  Then they expect families to sign up to be foster parents.  The bill boards in our area all say something about 'you don't have to be perfect to be a foster parent'.  Ok, but what do you need to be?  I would say above all Tenacious is the word I would use first.... then Intelligent,  Compassionate, Forgiving, a Warrior, and a Superhero.  Because being a foster parent is all about caring for a child and then fighting like hell to get them what they need to survive in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Yeah, this was in a small town back in the nineties.  The foster parents and the SWs were all friends and a lot of things were, let's say, overlooked.  My niece was in a place like this at 15yo.  It was horrible how she was treated.  She was in a foster home that specialized in pregnant teens.  They had separate cupboards for their food and were told once it ran out, they were out of luck until more money came in.  They slept in beds that were stacked on top of each other that were not bunk beds.  They would slip apart and fall periodically. They were only allowed to do laundry one day a week.  All the girls, only had one day to share...the rest of the week was for the family. Etc.  They were not treated with respect and they definitely were not cared for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015  ...SNIP....   On top of that, In our state if you are related in the slightest to the child you get zero foster dollars. They say family should take care of family....for free.   ...SNIP....  No wonder so few families step up to take in family foster kids. Your bound by the laws of the state and have foot the entire bill.  Yes. We don't receive any moneys for raising our nieces and nephews. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 12, 2015 Author Share Posted February 12, 2015 This is the saddest part for me.  Even our caseworker told me that foster kids who are placed due to neglect, need more of everything than a non-foster.  They are in the system for a multitude of reasons and they are behind in many ways.  Or there are kids like our daughter, who was taken at birth, but is drug affected, so she will never have a normal functioning brain.  But they give the families so little financial resources to get them the help they need.  They need extensive services.  They need extensive time invested into them. The need extra help in school. They need protection.  They need protecting from. They need basic needs met. They need clothes to fit in the right social groups. They need luxuries. They need sports. They need family vacations. They need an advocate to fight with the state over thing like insurance, therapy, and medications. .....The need is just so great!  Then they expect families to sign up to be foster parents.  The bill boards in our area all say something about 'you don't have to be perfect to be a foster parent'.  Ok, but what do you need to be?  I would say above all Tenacious is the word I would use first.... then Intelligent,  Compassionate, Forgiving, a Warrior, and a Superhero.  Because being a foster parent is all about caring for a child and then fighting like hell to get them what they need to survive in the world. This is so true.  Foster kids need EXTRA as they are in foster care for a reason---abuse, neglect, drug/alcohol exposure, etc.  We would love to take our foster son on our vacation out of state if he is still here but it would take about his entire monthly stipend just for the airline ticket.  Then we would need to rent a bigger car to seat 6, stay in hotels that allow for 6 in a room, etc. along with his meals, activities, etc.  The plan now is for me to take just the girls and dh to stay home with the boys.  We do plan on taking him along on an instate camping vacation earlier in the summer.  A sad commentary is that in the neighboring county, there is MORE money to rehab pit bulls than there is for helping foster kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 We have thought of doing foster care, but we don't have the space that they "require". We would provide a loving home but since they "require" the foster children to have their own rooms we just can't do it. That just sucks that you don't get a stripend for family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Family placements here can get money to assist of they go through the hoops to be licensed. The standards to be licensed ate at a higher bar than relative placements. Â My mom fell into the category of "not doing it for the money but couldn't have done it without." She referred to foster parents who did it for money as "rack and stack" foster parents. They'd take as many as they could, and keep them to rigid schedules, early bedrooms, and as medicated as possible. Vacations did not include the foster kids (they'd get respite care). Â Mom had more than one girl who either was rejected by a previous long-term placement as "too much trouble" to adopt or keep once puberty hit, or who she was able to get on much lower doses of psych meds and have them do well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 I'm so sorry about your foster situations. Â Just a comment re dogs--I made more walking dogs than I do teaching preschool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 We have thought of doing foster care, but we don't have the space that they "require". We would provide a loving home but since they "require" the foster children to have their own rooms we just can't do it. That just sucks that you don't get a stripend for family. They "require" it now so kids don't have to live the way I did when I was in a foster home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 They "require" it now so kids don't have to live the way I did when I was in a foster home.I understand why they have to have it that way. It just kind of stinks that dh and I are unable to foster a child that could very easily share a room with our girls in an emergeny situation. Our girls room is as big as our master bedroom :) and right now dd2 doesn't even sleep in there though there is a twin size bed for her in there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 This just all makes me so sad. I have taught so many foster children in an inner city school, and I was familiar with the foster parent who did for the money. So sad, so very sad. I still pray for those children 20 years later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 They "require" it now so kids don't have to live the way I did when I was in a foster home. There is a reasonable middle ground between "each child gets their own room" and "stacked in the basement like cord wood." Â How about designating a number of square feet a room needs to be to house two or three children, and put a cap on the number of children that can be fostered, with a more flexible rule for sibling groups? Â It's rules like "each foster child must have their own room" that can make placing sibling groups together nearly impossible, not to mention shutting most average size families in average size homes out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMamaBird Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Â Â A sad commentary is that in the neighboring county, there is MORE money to rehab pit bulls than there is for helping foster kids. Â That makes my heart hurt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaners Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Ugh. That money assumption. People ask us all.the.time how much money we get to take care of our kids with special needs. They weren't in the foster system (international adoption) so the answer is - nothing. Extra tactless individuals go on to question why we did it then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 There is a reasonable middle ground between "each child gets their own room" and "stacked in the basement like cord wood."  How about designating a number of square feet a room needs to be to house two or three children, and put a cap on the number of children that can be fostered, with a more flexible rule for sibling groups?  It's rules like "each foster child must have their own room" that can make placing sibling groups together nearly impossible, not to mention shutting most average size families in average size homes out. Every state has different rules. My state allows same gender kids to share rooms, they just have to have a certain square footage per room and have their own bed.  It isn't a huge number of sq footage, but I don't remember it exactly.  My kids rooms which are 10x13 were approved for my bio kid, plus one foster.    Some states  have more lenient rules for sibling groups or the case workers can file exemptions to allow for special circumstances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 I really don't understand how this goes on. When we fostered, we had SW in our home at LEAST twice a month, plus therapists twice a week, plus many doctor visits and at least weekly supervised visits with bios. It always baffles me how foster parents can get away with neglect or abuse when the state is almost living in your home with you!?! Our case workers came by very infrequently.  Maybe every 3 months or so? They never asked to see the bedroom, or to check on any other part of the home.  To be honest though, our house was 5 years old, in a nice subdivision, it is clean, organized and well decorated.  It is pretty obvious by the toys in the living room and by the child herself, that she was taken care or and nourished, so they openly said, that they didn't really feel that there was much to monitor. They knew our income at the time, so they knew that we were not caring for her for the couple hundred dollars a month that she was getting in a TANF grant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 If anyone is curious, here is a link to some of the rules regarding foster care home studies. Â Hint to navigate the article to find your state faster...Open the document and then use CNTL+F to open a search field. Â Type in your states name into the search field to see if it is listed in the article. Use the up/down arrows on the search tab to move through the article. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 There is a reasonable middle ground between "each child gets their own room" and "stacked in the basement like cord wood." Â How about designating a number of square feet a room needs to be to house two or three children, and put a cap on the number of children that can be fostered, with a more flexible rule for sibling groups? Â It's rules like "each foster child must have their own room" that can make placing sibling groups together nearly impossible, not to mention shutting most average size families in average size homes out. Â I've always assumed rules like that are to keep unrelated kids from rooming together. Â I would guess a lot of states have different rules for sibling groups. Â And I'm not saying each kid needs a master suite to his or herself, but I am glad there have been improvements in the laws (if not enforcement, sadly) since I was a kid. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 I really don't understand how this goes on. When we fostered, we had SW in our home at LEAST twice a month, plus therapists twice a week, plus many doctor visits and at least weekly supervised visits with bios. It always baffles me how foster parents can get away with neglect or abuse when the state is almost living in your home with you!?! there is not necessarily so much in your home happening here. Here I do a monthly report and email it in, plus a fortnightly phone call. The OT and speech therapist come every fortnight. they have never been in the house thought, they do their therapy on the veranda with the twins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 13, 2015 Author Share Posted February 13, 2015 We have thought of doing foster care, but we don't have the space that they "require". We would provide a loving home but since they "require" the foster children to have their own rooms we just can't do it. That just sucks that you don't get a stripend for family. In Michigan is is 40 sq feet per child so a 10x12 room could hold 3 kids. Â They don't have the MUST have their own room rule. Â That said, there is great value in having a foster child in their own room, esp. if they are school age. Â Sadly 80% of them have been sexually abused or overexposed and some of them will act this out on other kids.....not always even as a predator, but rather that is just what they are used to. Â Some can be very verbally and/or physically aggressive as well. Â They can also be very street wise and expose your children to things that you might not want them to know yet. Â We have had foster kids share bedrooms but most of the time they have their own room. Â We are licensed for 4 and could get a group license for 6 but we know that with our own 3, 1 or 2 is really all we can handle at a time and give them the attention and care they need. Â In Michigan, relatives can become licensed and get foster care payments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 In Michigan is is 40 sq feet per child so a 10x12 room could hold 3 kids. They don't have the MUST have their own room rule. Â That said, there is great value in having a foster child in their own room, esp. if they are school age. Sadly 80% of them have been sexually abused or overexposed and some of them will act this out on other kids.....not always even as a predator, but rather that is just what they are used to. Some can be very verbally and/or physically aggressive as well. They can also be very street wise and expose your children to things that you might not want them to know yet. Â We have had foster kids share bedrooms but most of the time they have their own room. We are licensed for 4 and could get a group license for 6 but we know that with our own 3, 1 or 2 is really all we can handle at a time and give them the attention and care they need. Â In Michigan, relatives can become licensed and get foster care payments. Hmmm I was told that we couldn't foster because we don't have rooms for each child (then again this lady had an issue with me). We were going to be licensed for relative care (my brother's 3) and respite care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 13, 2015 Author Share Posted February 13, 2015 Hmmm I was told that we couldn't foster because we don't have rooms for each child (then again this lady had an issue with me). We were going to be licensed for relative care (my brother's 3) and respite care. I would call another local agency and ask about licensing rules. Â Some workers (rare) can make things more difficult than they need to be. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea_lpz Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 We received an emergency placement of a child who had been in a situation like this. It is despicable to take a perfectly healthy newborn, place him in a crib, prop up his bottles, never cuddle or hold him, or help him to develop normally. The little guy we had was two weeks away from his first birthday. He could not sit up, roll over, grasp anything, or pull his hand out if it was tucked under his leg. He weighed about 23 lbs and was completely dead weight. We were not able to keep him long-term, but within the two months he was with us, he learned how to sit up, and was gaining in overall muscle tone. Â I hope you have reported these people for child abuse/neglect. Oh no that's heart breaking :(. I think this thread will make me too sad! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea_lpz Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 In Ca it's 2 to a room max with children over 5 needing to be of same gender. That would put us out of being able to foster. We have a 3 bedroom with 2 to a room right now, lol, but if we had a bigger place I would consider it! Right now my 7 year old daughter and 10 month old share a room and my 5 year old and 10 year old stepson who we have every other weekend and about half our breaks. Â Honestly our place would be too small though so I would be hesitant to do it anyhow.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 :grouphug:Â Mergath, my heart hurts for what you and the others went through. Â Â One of my dearest friends was in foster care for 10 years. Â She suffered countless moves, and a final foster mom who kicked her out the day after she graduated from high school. Â The foster mother was matter of fact about needing a placement that came with an income; my friend said she provided food and shelter but that was it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 here sibling groups can share a room, but non-related children have to have their own room. I think that is a perfectly reasonable rule. Â The twins share a room. In fact they become very stressed if they are out of each other's sight for more than 10 minutes, and have to be constantly reassured that their brother is still sleeping ( or whatever) and hasn't gone anywhere Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 The lady who looked after my kids when they were little had a foster child at one point. She said the quarterly grant she got from the government (NZ) for clothing was more than she spent on her own kids for a year. Also tgd foster mothers of infants I have met got free milk and nappies and a grant for cots, prams etc that was more than they had been able to spend on their own kids. Â Of course the kids aren't always easy, it can be a heartbreaking experience and it takes a much stronger person than I am to do a good job. Also I think the foster child has to be 3 years younger than your youngest which can be a bit hard on the youngest child. Â I don't know anyone who has gone into it with other than pure motives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 15, 2015 Author Share Posted February 15, 2015 The lady who looked after my kids when they were little had a foster child at one point. She said the quarterly grant she got from the government (NZ) for clothing was more than she spent on her own kids for a year. Also tgd foster mothers of infants I have met got free milk and nappies and a grant for cots, prams etc that was more than they had been able to spend on their own kids. Â Of course the kids aren't always easy, it can be a heartbreaking experience and it takes a much stronger person than I am to do a good job. Also I think the foster child has to be 3 years younger than your youngest which can be a bit hard on the youngest child. Â I don't know anyone who has gone into it with other than pure motives. Sounds like NZ really helps out their foster parents. Â We might get an initial clothing allowance of $150-200 for the child but they come with NOTHING. Â Our current one didnt' even have shoes that fit when he came. Â I have gotten kids with just a wet diaper on---not even a T shirt. Â And then rules state everything you buy them must be brand new.........and depending on their funding source you might get a vochure to Target which you must spend all in one day..........all of which makes it very hard to bargain shop. Â We then do get $107 twice a year for clothing which does help. Â Kids under 5 can get WIC which covers some very basic foods and baby formula but no help for diapers, car seats, cribs, etc. Â In our area foster parents are good with sharing what they have and there are a few churches that have sharing closets where you can go and borrow bigger items and can get some used clothes for free. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 Sounds like NZ really helps out their foster parents. Â We might get an initial clothing allowance of $150-200 for the child but they come with NOTHING. Our current one didnt' even have shoes that fit when he came. I have gotten kids with just a wet diaper on---not even a T shirt. And then rules state everything you buy them must be brand new.........and depending on their funding source you might get a vochure to Target which you must spend all in one day..........all of which makes it very hard to bargain shop. Â We then do get $107 twice a year for clothing which does help. Â Kids under 5 can get WIC which covers some very basic foods and baby formula but no help for diapers, car seats, cribs, etc. Â In our area foster parents are good with sharing what they have and there are a few churches that have sharing closets where you can go and borrow bigger items and can get some used clothes for free. Is it everything you buy them, or just everything you buy them with the voucher? Because I think it's good that they have to be purchased some new things, but rules that exclude treating them the same as ones own kids (so able to wear hands me downs, etc.) Seems unreasonable. Â I do think that there should be consideration of a child's background and history taken into account in the living arrangements for placement. Some kids need their own space. Others would be fine sharing a room with a foster sib. Â Social workers with agendas are not cool. I'd get a second source on it if I thought a social worker was blowing smoke where the sun don't shine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 I just saw an ad for DOGGY daycare----meaning taking care of your dog for 9 hours a day and it was $7 per day MORE than we get for a foster child.........a child that we care for 24 hours a day (yes they do go to school though), clothe, feed, transport, entertain, and pay for things they need.  Day care rates for a 9 hour day for a school age child is $30-40/day compared to the $17.24 a day the state pays for a foster child.  Something is wrong here.  Just my rant for the day. Well, that is disgusting, that dog-watching is more important than kid rearing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 Well, that is disgusting, that dog-watching is more important than kid rearing. But it's not specifically saying that dog watching is more important than kid rearing.  It's saying that dog owners (at least one that use such services) have more disposable income.  Perhaps you should open a doggy daycare and use those funds to help foster kids!  (This is directed to anyone and no one, not specifically at TM).  Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 But it's not specifically saying that dog watching is more important than kid rearing.  It's saying that dog owners (at least one that use such services) have more disposable income.  Perhaps you should open a doggy daycare and use those funds to help foster kids!  (This is directed to anyone and no one, not specifically at TM).  Yeah, you are barking up the wrong tree here (not a dog lover)....pun intended.  I do think dogs get treated better than many kids, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted February 16, 2015 Author Share Posted February 16, 2015 Is it everything you buy them, or just everything you buy them with the voucher? Because I think it's good that they have to be purchased some new things, but rules that exclude treating them the same as ones own kids (so able to wear hands me downs, etc.) Seems unreasonable. Â I do think that there should be consideration of a child's background and history taken into account in the living arrangements for placement. Some kids need their own space. Others would be fine sharing a room with a foster sib. Â Social workers with agendas are not cool. I'd get a second source on it if I thought a social worker was blowing smoke where the sun don't shine. They can wear hand me downs, thrift store clothing, etc. but we must buy new clothing when using their clothing money. Â It makes it harder as it is winter so you need boots, snow pants, winter coat, hat and gloves for cold weather so that can take up a huge chunk when it must all be new. Â We have some great thrift stores around here though and I can fill in a lot with stuff for $1-2 item for nice items.......like $1 polo brand dress pants or name brand hoodie. Â I agree that you do have to take into consideration the background when deciding if they should share a room or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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