Contraceptive Question

[LittleIzumi]

I'm sorry, I thought you were saying that there is no Biblically-approved birth control.

 

No, just that the argument about messing with God's design doesn't make sense to me personally when the goal is 100% lack of conception forever. That radical of a change to our body functions only comes with actual design changes. ;)

[TranquilMind]

I'm curious how he thinks it is more unethical then something temporary?

 

ETA: From my POV, a permanent solution is more ethical then many of the temp options.

 

Yes, I am not following the logic there. You either do or you do not believe birth control is ethically acceptable. If you do, what difference does it make if you do it "for awhile", which could be the rest of your child bearing years, or permanently by a vasectomy?

[stripe]

Yes, I am not following the logic there. You either do or you do not believe birth control is ethically acceptable. If you do, what difference does it make if you do it "for awhile", which could be the rest of your child bearing years, or permanently by a vasectomy?

 

Because one could change.

[Carrie12345]

Don't you need a uterus to get pregnant? What am I missing?

 

 

 

:iagree: THIS. Do your research. Don't just go to the person you usually see because it's convenient. IUDs work amazingly well . . .better than ANY other non-permanent solution, but they must be properly placed. I went to a separate Dr. just for this on the recommendation of my midwife, regular gyn, and a female friend who is a doctor. It's important.

 

I've never heard of anyone having an IUD in place for years and then getting pregnant. The stories are generally of people getting pregnant very soon after getting an IUD. Device failure and improper 'installation' are two different matters.

 

Mine was in for a full year when it failed, in perfect position. Pregnancy was ectopic, and did nearly kill me, even with close watch from multiple doctors.

 

I have zero issues with ectopic "abortions", but I do think those who do should carefully consider the fact that rare IUD failures DO tend to be ectopic.

[PrincessMommy]

I wouldn't pressure either, but it is frustrating because my need is so much lower, and it seems every option seems to fall to something I have to do that I am not comfortable with except condoms, but those aren't his favorite. We do both agree that having another baby is out of the question, so this leaves him frustrated with the frequency because we are both so cautious. I end up taking the blame, though. He is more comfortable with me being sterilized, though but not completely.

 

i have not read all the responses but will since this is something I'm dealing with too. We went through exactly this. Condoms were not working for my husband (sorry TMI). I was also having problems with my period and wanted to avoid a hysterectomy so we went with the pill. But, after nearly 10yrs I'm so tired of being on the pill. I know it has effected me negatively, especially during menopause.

 

Back in the day we did discuss him getting a vasectomy. I let him decide since it was his body.... but you are absolutely right.... Now it means that all this falls on me to take care of. I regret not pressuring him more into getting the vasectomy.

[amy g.]

I wanted my husband to get a vasectomy after having our third baby. He agreed that it was fair and the best choice, but did not want to do it, because he was not convinced that I would not change my mind.

 

We used NFP for 8 years with great success until I did change my mind and decided that we needed more children. How glad I was that we had done nothing to diminish our chances of conceiving.

 

After having 2 more, I again decided I was through, and wished for some birth control option that would not have unwanted side effects, but could find nothing that really meets our needs.

 

After this years' accidental pregnancy and miscarriage, I've decided that I really do not want to limit God's plan for our family. I'm 46 so I doubt I will have another baby, but if I do, I will be quite happy about it.

 

My point is that you both either believe birth control is fine, or believe in not using birth control. I can see being open to barrier methods, but not methods which might inhibit the implantation of a fertilized egg.

 

If my husband did not want a vasectomy because it interferes with God's design, but wanted ME to find birth control that would obviously have some

degree of Effect on my body and God's design for me, I really do not think I would be willing to sleep with him at all.

 

I really do not see any logic to his position at all.

 

I'm not saying, at all, that you need to have more children, but if you both feel done, he needs to take responsibility for that decision and quit dumping it on you.

 

He is really being quite selfish.

[Nestof3]

Honestly, he ends up not being selfish in this because he admits that since he is the one who has hesitations about this, and because we are both adamant about not having another baby, we end up either being creative, abstinent, or using barrier at the absolute safest time (about 1x month). This is harder on him because I am okay with creative :lol:, but he just sees it as a cross to bear because it's his hesitation that is causing the difficulty. He knows he would be happier with a permanent solution, and he keeps revisiting it, but he is still worried that going in and changing the body physically may be wrong. I don't get the logic either -- to me, preventing it in any manner is the same.

 

I wanted my husband to get a vasectomy after having our third baby. He agreed that it was fair and the best choice, but did not want to do it, because he was not convinced that I would not change my mind.

 

We used NFP for 8 years with great success until I did change my mind and decided that we needed more children. How glad I was that we had done nothing to diminish our chances of conceiving.

 

After having 2 more, I again decided I was through, and wished for some birth control option that would not have unwanted side effects, but could find nothing that really meets our needs.

 

After this years' accidental pregnancy and miscarriage, I've decided that I really do not want to limit God's plan for our family. I'm 46 so I doubt I will have another baby, but if I do, I will be quite happy about it.

 

My point is that you both either believe birth control is fine, or believe in not using birth control. I can see being open to barrier methods, but not methods which might inhibit the implantation of a fertilized egg.

 

If my husband did not want a vasectomy because it interferes with God's design, but wanted ME to find birth control that would obviously have some

degree of Effect on my body and God's design for me, I really do not think I would be willing to sleep with him at all.

 

I really do not see any logic to his position at all.

 

I'm not saying, at all, that you need to have more children, but if you both feel done, he needs to take responsibility for that decision and quit dumping it on you.

 

He is really being quite selfish.

[tomandlorih]

Not to be a downer here.. but if you are truly done, as in, we absolutely cannot have another, something permanent is the only way to go. All other methods can and do fail all the time(even when used correctly and faithfully).

 

Yup, been up since 4:30 with mine.. lol

 

Had my tubes tied with the C-section!

[Nestof3]

We did NFP for years as well, before my thyroid caused an irregular cycle. We were younger and even considered having another. Getting pregnant would not have been a negative thing in our lives then. I actually took a couple tests because my cycle got wonky, and it was sort of an exciting thing. The last time, we were absolutely fearful. My husband didn't let on how he was feeling, but when we found out I was not pregnant (and it was practically impossible that I was, but with irregularity comes craziness :lol:), he admitted his feelings. I share them.

 

Perhaps if I were married to someone younger with a job not physically demanding I would feel somewhat better about it. I don't know. I too feel like I cannot do this again, though. I began parenting before even getting married, and it was a very difficult family blending that took its toll on me. Our boys have issues that make them very exhausting. Every day is truly exhausting -- my youngest is very needy (anger issues, focusing issues), and our middle son's Asperger tendencies are draining.

[Catwoman]

He knows he would be happier with a permanent solution, and he keeps revisiting it, but he is still worried that going in and changing the body physically may be wrong. I don't get the logic either -- to me, preventing it in any manner is the same.

 

So you're saying that you're sure he's not just being a Big Chicken about it? :D

 

I only say this because I had a friend whose dh used the same "God wouldn't want me to do it," excuse for years, until she finally said, "No snippy, no nookie." (Well, OK, she might have phrased it differently, but that was the general idea.) He had the vasectomy.

 

And once it was over, he sheepishly admitted that a huge part of his hesitation was the fear of somebody messing around "down there" with a sharp knife.

[tomandlorih]

Honestly, he ends up not being selfish in this because he admits that since he is the one who has hesitations about this, and because we are both adamant about not having another baby, we end up either being creative, abstinent, or using barrier at the absolute safest time (about 1x month). This is harder on him because I am okay with creative :lol:, but he just sees it as a cross to bear because it's his hesitation that is causing the difficulty. He knows he would be happier with a permanent solution, and he keeps revisiting it, but he is still worried that going in and changing the body physically may be wrong. I don't get the logic either -- to me, preventing it in any manner is the same.

 

Oh, well.. looks like you'll be safe enough with that. lol It sounds like he's getting there and will get there when he's ready.. Sorry for the strain in the meantime though..

[Nestof3]

So you're saying that you're sure he's not just being a Big Chicken about it? :D

 

I only say this because I had a friend whose dh used the same "God wouldn't want me to do it," excuse for years, until she finally said, "No snippy, no nookie." (Well, OK, she might have phrased it differently, but that was the general idea.) He had the vasectomy.

 

And once it was over, he sheepishly admitted that a huge part of his hesitation was the fear of somebody messing around "down there" with a sharp knife.

 

Yes, I am sure. Quite sure. When I named the terms (barrier if we get it in within 2 days of my cycle or no intercourse), he just accepted it as something he would take. We don't even get one in a month.

 

He gets very concerned about some things Biblically. Years ago (in our early years of marital bliss), we were fellowshipping with people who said they had to stop meeting with us because we were living in sin. Because my husband was divorced, they said we were not really married but living in adultery. He read the Bible over and over regarding this, read articles on it, and read a recommendation that a man in this situation live elsewhere but provide for the new family he created. The articles were very persuasive. He was honestly contemplating living in the garage because he was so worried he was sinning. Finally, he denounced it, but he actually took it seriously because he said if it were true, he had to follow it.

 

(We have clearly spent too much time with wacky Christians. )

[Catwoman]

He gets very concerned about some things Biblically. Years ago (in our early years of marital bliss), we were fellowshipping with people who said they had to stop meeting with us because we were living in sin. Because my husband was divorced, they said we were not really married but living in adultery. He read the Bible over and over regarding this, read articles on it, and read a recommendation that a man in this situation live elsewhere but provide for the new family he created. The articles were very persuasive. He was honestly contemplating living in the garage because he was so worried he was sinning. Finally, he denounced it, but he actually took it seriously because he said if it were true, he had to follow it.

 

(We have clearly spent too much time with wacky Christians. )

 

I don't think my ideas are going to be of much help to you, because I have to be honest and tell you that I don't think I could even be married to a guy who would worry to that extent that he was sinning. It's just so far off my radar that I would spend half my time laughing at him and telling him he was a nut.

 

I'm fine with a lot of Christian stuff, but that whole "living in the garage" idea is way too extreme for me -- and even the idea that he was worried about it would be beyond what I could deal with.

 

I'm not saying that it's not OK to believe that stuff, because for all I know, it's absolutely true and I'm the clueless one, but I'm just saying that I couldn't relate to it at all.

 

I hope you're able to find a solution that works for both of you, but unless one of you has a permanent physical procedure done, no form of birth control will give you 100% protection, and because a V is a whole lot less invasive than a female procedure, it's a no-brainer which one should be chosen.

 

Sorry this is a tough decision for you guys -- and I'm especially sorry for your dh, if this is truly a religious issue for him. :grouphug:

[JumpyTheFrog]

(We have clearly spent too much time with wacky Christians. )

 

Maybe a good use of your time would be to spend time reading the opposing points of view of the wacky things you were taught. We left a mostly QF/patriarchal church two years ago and while we never fully bought into many of their beliefs, it still took a while to get rid of the nagging guilt of legalism.

 

We didn't have a problem with temporary contraception (like people there did), but we did believe permanent methods were wrong. Over time, we came to realize that the Bible really doesn't have anything to say about it, so it is an area of freedom for Christians. My pregnancies gave me lots of health problems that I still haven't recovered from, so ever having another baby was out. We also didn't want to spend 15-20 years waiting for menopause.

[Nestof3]

Maybe a good use of your time would be to spend time reading the opposing points of view of the wacky things you were taught. We left a mostly QF/patriarchal church two years ago and while we never fully bought into many of their beliefs, it still took a while to get rid of the nagging guilt of legalism.

 

We didn't have a problem with temporary contraception (like people there did), but we did believe permanent methods were wrong. Over time, we came to realize that the Bible really doesn't have anything to say about it, so it is an area of freedom for Christians. My pregnancies gave me lots of health problems that I still haven't recovered from, so ever having another baby was out. We also didn't want to spend 15-20 years waiting for menopause.

 

Yes! I think unless you spent years in a QF patriarchal church for years, I think it's hard to understand how damaging some of the teaching is. We left nearly every Sunday frustrated on some level. The corporal punishment thoughts alone would freak most out.

[8circles]

Yes, I am sure. Quite sure. When I named the terms (barrier if we get it in within 2 days of my cycle or no intercourse), he just accepted it as something he would take. We don't even get one in a month.

 

He gets very concerned about some things Biblically. Years ago (in our early years of marital bliss), we were fellowshipping with people who said they had to stop meeting with us because we were living in sin. Because my husband was divorced, they said we were not really married but living in adultery. He read the Bible over and over regarding this, read articles on it, and read a recommendation that a man in this situation live elsewhere but provide for the new family he created. The articles were very persuasive. He was honestly contemplating living in the garage because he was so worried he was sinning. Finally, he denounced it, but he actually took it seriously because he said if it were true, he had to follow it.

 

(We have clearly spent too much time with wacky Christians. )

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:Dawn, my heart hurts for both of you. Your DH for still suffering from the false theology that is still haunting him & you for suffering as well as a result. I pray that he, & as a result you & your whole family, will be finally & ultimately delivered from the lies that you were told about God. Come Holy Spirit, Come. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Many prayers, Dawn.

[Bluegoat]

Honestly, he ends up not being selfish in this because he admits that since he is the one who has hesitations about this, and because we are both adamant about not having another baby, we end up either being creative, abstinent, or using barrier at the absolute safest time (about 1x month). This is harder on him because I am okay with creative :lol:, but he just sees it as a cross to bear because it's his hesitation that is causing the difficulty. He knows he would be happier with a permanent solution, and he keeps revisiting it, but he is still worried that going in and changing the body physically may be wrong. I don't get the logic either -- to me, preventing it in any manner is the same.

 

Well, one of the reasons some groups consider sterilization to be wrong in a different way (not necessarily worse) than other types of birth control is that they see it as mutilation of the body.

 

So they would see a barrier method as bad because it frustrates the purpose of the act. A hormonal method does that too and is also potentially abortive. And they would say that sterilization not only frustrates the act, but that it is taking a healthy part of the body that it is working the way it should and making it work improperly, essentially so you can have sex without the natural results.

 

So analogous to a person having some crazy surgery on their stomach not to fix an unfortunate problem, but so they could eat as much as they wanted without absorbing calories. (Not that such a thing is possible but you get the idea.)

 

Don't know if your husband has some idea like this in mind. If he does I'd say his issue should be with birth control at all though, not just sterilization.

[mchel210]

My husband went on a friday and had the procedure with no pain and was up by monday with no issues. He used a jock strap which eased all pain. Not sure if that helps...but if it is an issue of religion...that would be different. None are acceptable in the Catholic church...only abstinence, timing out the days and rhythm method. Im not willing to accept either. Im not against other medical procedures so I cant imagine not allowing this one...(just my view) I have no desire to start a new hormone after struggling so long with my thyroid. Neither one of us wants to risk having more children. Im just waiting for Grandchildren! It is wonderful not having to think about it EVER!

I imagine condoms are the easiest to use but you have to be consistent along with figuring out which days to avoid. I have never tried any of those rings...but I see many have hormones as well. I would be too scared to try spermicide alone for fear it would fail. And birth control pills are not an option. Either way...It is all private and no one needs to know what you decide on. So...maybe that will help with a choice.

Edited October 15, 2012 by mchel210

[Mommy22alyns]

Mirena IUD. I know they're controversial, but for me the hormones didn't go system-wide (I am also unable to take the pill), it stopped my period for years, and was effective.

[stripe]

Well, one of the reasons some groups consider sterilization to be wrong in a different way (not necessarily worse) than other types of birth control is that they see it as mutilation of the body.

 

So they would see a barrier method as bad because it frustrates the purpose of the act. A hormonal method does that too and is also potentially abortive.

 

However, some people are opposed to sterilization for practical (one's mind my change) and moral/religious reasons related to its permanence. Some of those same people would not oppose barrier methods. Some people do not believe life "begins at conception" or that preventing implantation=abortion. I can understand the concerns about permanent methods, and I think the imperfections of many temporary birth control methods frustrate the ones engaging in the act. ;)

[Nestof3]

Yes, I understand all these concerns people may have. I also have a concern that people deprived of intercourse in marriage can be quite unhappy and that having another child to raise when you already wish the ones you have were grown also plays into the decision-making.

 

I can think of little worse than a child growing up without love.

 

Well, one of the reasons some groups consider sterilization to be wrong in a different way (not necessarily worse) than other types of birth control is that they see it as mutilation of the body.

 

So they would see a barrier method as bad because it frustrates the purpose of the act. A hormonal method does that too and is also potentially abortive. And they would say that sterilization not only frustrates the act, but that it is taking a healthy part of the body that it is working the way it should and making it work improperly, essentially so you can have sex without the natural results.

 

So analogous to a person having some crazy surgery on their stomach not to fix an unfortunate problem, but so they could eat as much as they wanted without absorbing calories. (Not that such a thing is possible but you get the idea.)

 

Don't know if your husband has some idea like this in mind. If he does I'd say his issue should be with birth control at all though, not just sterilization.

[stripe]

Dawn, I am really starting to wonder what happened to that Ovaprene ring that was expected to come out in 2011. I finally found a picture of it. It looks like a ring (not unlike the nuvaring) but isn't empty on the middle. There is a mesh screen that apparently is implanted with something nonhormonal that is spermicidal. But it's flat, not domed like a diaphragm. I haven't found any more info on its release or whats going on. I am kind of intrigued by it.

[Lovedtodeath]

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:Dawn, my heart hurts for both of you. Your DH for still suffering from the false theology that is still haunting him & you for suffering as well as a result. I pray that he, & as a result you & your whole family, will be finally & ultimately delivered from the lies that you were told about God. Come Holy Spirit, Come. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Many prayers, Dawn.

I love you!!!! :001_tt1:

[Lovedtodeath]

I'm sorry, but I just don't believe God's design is for all women to conceive at all times, and I do not think tea's only purpose is conception. I believe God created the reproductive system, but I think people have to make choices regarding their family size based on many factors. With the age difference we have, my husband could be a father at 63, and I see no wisdom in that. I also only want to have children when I know I have what it takes to give them the best they deserve.

I believe that our bodies producing children beyond our capacity to care for them is a result of the fall.

 

In addition, teA is the way two become one, and this is not only when a child is produced, but due to other reasons.

[staceyobu]

I'm really thinkin an iud is the way to go. You can try mirena and see if you're okay with the lower hormone dose or just get the copper one. It's basically as effective as something permanent. But, it's not permanent.

[ereks mom]

IF (I know this is a big "if") used correctly, spermicides have a 94% effectiveness rate. Dh & I have used spermicides with 100% effectiveness for over 30 years. We have 2 children, both of whom were planned pregnancies.

[AnnaM]

Has anyone mentioned NFP? If you chart consistently it is very effective. We would abstain or use what we called the "pull and pray" (which was very effective for us) for a few days when I was ovulating and then go back to it after. It also gave me the benefit of knowing exactly when my AF was going to start. My two "surprise" pregnancies weren't planned exactly but we know that we had tEA during fertile times and knew it was possible so it was user error so to speak.

[goldberry]

My husband felt this way at first (that it bothered him from a faith standpoint).

 

I didn't understand it because I don't feel that way...but I respect his right to have strong feelings that don't always make sense regarding personal issues! I have enough of those myself and am always so grateful that he honors my feelings whether they make sense or not.

 

So, I didn't make a big deal out of it. After about 3-4 years, he came to me on his own and said after thinking/praying more he had changed his mind and was ready. Snip and done!

[AnnaM]

The thing is, wanting to have TeA without making babies IS messing with God's design. It's not like there are foolproof Biblical methods of effective birth control. To not get pregnant, you or he will have to have to physically stop conception, and if he truly wants NO chance of getting pregnant, barrier methods are not going to do that. Statistically there will still be a fair chance of getting pregnant. Plus it's easier to reverse it if he's snipped rather than you. Have you guys prayed about this choice?

 

Tell that to my uterus which has produced high risk dangerous pregnancies due to a severe uterine deformity. I don't believe for one moment that I am messing with God's plan for me by not playing fatalist and following the wisdom he has given me through doctors which have warned me that another pregnancy will almost certainly end in a ruptured uterus and a dead baby.

[GraciebytheBay]

I want to put in a plug for the diaphragm. :lol: (Couldn't resist!) Seriously, it is easy to use and completely hormone free. The only problem with a diaphragm is that you have to insert it, which interrupts things. This isn't that big of a deal, though. The link below says it is 94% effective when used correctly and every single time. I have read 97% in other places. It is also fairly inexpensive, as all you have to purchase is the spermicidal jelly. Much to dh's dismay, a tube lasts us a while. :rolleyes:

 

http://www.familyplanning.org/pdf/Facts_About_Diaphragms.pdf

[stripe]

I have read a diaphragm is more effective when used by older, married women who are motivated to use it. I suspect non-use is a significant problem, like most methods.

[bry's-gal]

NOT a condom! LOL!

 

We both were done having kids but hubby didn't want to get a V- said he wasn't ready for it. I agreed to wait until he was on board and we used condoms. Baby #3 is coming in March! And, yes, we did use them EVERY time the month we conceived!

[ktgrok]

Has anyone mentioned NFP? If you chart consistently it is very effective. We would abstain or use what we called the "pull and pray" (which was very effective for us) for a few days when I was ovulating and then go back to it after. It also gave me the benefit of knowing exactly when my AF was going to start. My two "surprise" pregnancies weren't planned exactly but we know that we had tEA during fertile times and knew it was possible so it was user error so to speak.

 

that was my feeling, before this new baby. But he was concieved 4 days before I ovulated, with NO cervical mucus (dry day), and the pull and pray technique.

[LittleIzumi]

Tell that to my uterus which has produced high risk dangerous pregnancies due to a severe uterine deformity. I don't believe for one moment that I am messing with God's plan for me by not playing fatalist and following the wisdom he has given me through doctors which have warned me that another pregnancy will almost certainly end in a ruptured uterus and a dead baby.

 

Man, I need to put a warning before that post people keep quoting. I am NOT quiverful. At all. Dh plans to get a V after our 4th baby. I was trying (and had to rephrase later because it apparently didn't come across, so if you kept reading the thread it would have been cleared up) that there is a logical disconnect in saying that sterilization is messing with God's design when ALL birth control is in some way messing with God's design. It's in a more permanent way, but from a religious perspective it's still changing God's design. If you believe it's God's design to have babies (so that sterilization would be "going against that," as was mentioned previously as an argument against sterilization only,) then so is any birth control. That's all. And NFP didn't work well for me as I conceived when I had no physical signs of ovulation and hadn't gotten AF back yet while still heavily nursing my current wee one. I wasn't temping, but I also have always had a period of months when I was infertile after getting AF back and this time, ha ha, not so much.

[Moxie]

I believe that our bodies producing children beyond our capacity to care for them is a result of the fall.

 

 

I don't think I can follow the theology on that one.

[Mrs Mungo]

Personally, I would worry that the lack of physical contact is creating more problems than it is solving. :(

[SonshineLearner]

 

LadyComp is a non invasive method with 99% accuracy, from their site. I've known someone who used it and it only failed when they decided to go ahead even though it said "not to".... The one for not ever having a baby is less than the one that tells you both ways. Basically it's a brain... and stores info :)

[Aspasia]

I'm all about the copper IUD. Nonhormonal, super reliable (yes, I know it's not perfect), and I didn't really notice that my periods were heavier.

[Nestof3]

Personally, I would worry that the lack of physical contact is creating more problems than it is solving. :(

 

:iagree:

[Joanne]

Copper IUD. 12 happy years with mine. I'll miss it. I'm overdue to remove it, but we're figuring out permanent options now.

 

This is me, with the Mirena. It's been 7? 8? more? years. I'm 46 and not having sex, so I need to have it removed.

[Joanne]

I want to put in a plug for the diaphragm. :lol: (Couldn't resist!) http://www.familyplanning.org/pdf/Facts_About_Diaphragms.pdf

 

:lol::tongue_smilie:

[stripe]

LadyComp is a non invasive method with 99% accuracy, from their site. I've known someone who used it and it only failed when they decided to go ahead even though it said "not to".... The one for not ever having a baby is less than the one that tells you both ways. Basically it's a brain... and stores info :)

 

That's interesting -- I didn't realize it had a database of info, because the author of Taking Charge of Your Fertility has a software program and you input cervical mucus and temp and any other signs you observe (like cervical position), but I really have no idea how it works, more like interpreting the "rules," but it sounds very different from LadyComp, which I didn't realize.

[Caroline]

Personally, I would worry that the lack of physical contact is creating more problems than it is solving. :(

 

:iagree:

[AnnaM]

Man, I need to put a warning before that post people keep quoting. I am NOT quiverful. At all. Dh plans to get a V after our 4th baby. I was trying (and had to rephrase later because it apparently didn't come across, so if you kept reading the thread it would have been cleared up) that there is a logical disconnect in saying that sterilization is messing with God's design when ALL birth control is in some way messing with God's design. It's in a more permanent way, but from a religious perspective it's still changing God's design. If you believe it's God's design to have babies (so that sterilization would be "going against that," as was mentioned previously as an argument against sterilization only,) then so is any birth control. That's all. And NFP didn't work well for me as I conceived when I had no physical signs of ovulation and hadn't gotten AF back yet while still heavily nursing my current wee one. I wasn't temping, but I also have always had a period of months when I was infertile after getting AF back and this time, ha ha, not so much.

 

:) I understand you now. This is touchy for me because I have had women tell me that if I really trusted God I would continue to allow him to "guide" my fertility knowing that it would probably kill either the baby, me or both. I mean really laid it on me hard.

 

I got pregnant with #2 just 3 weeks post partum. Seriously, I had not even finished with the after birth stuff (gross I know but I had been on bed rest from 17 weeks on so we were both pretty desperate for some tEA. I had no idea you could even ovulate while that was going on. Surprise!

Edited October 16, 2012 by AnnaM

[Dianne-TX]

It is hormonal, but a lower dose than oral. My understanding is it works for a lot of people that have trouble with oral contraceptives.

 

Diaphragms are not that effective. If you really don't want more kids, I'd be nervous about a diaphragm.

 

A copper iud would be my other recommendation, but I'm a bit leery because it can make your periods worse.

 

I'm living proof that a diaphragm doesn't always work! I always say that I was the 5% (or whatever the failure rate is now) that got by! :lol::lol:

[OneBusyMomma]

I personally do not recommend Mirena. I am dealing with a list a mile long of side effects from mine and am getting it removed this week.

 

Check out this blog:

http://lifeaftermirena.blogspot.com/2008/02/so-you-think-your-iud-is-causing.html

 

I know everyone has a different reaction to birth control but if you have issues with the pill I highly recommend doing a lot of researching before getting Mirena.

Edited October 16, 2012 by OneBusyMomma

[Mrs Mungo]

I'm living proof that a diaphragm doesn't always work! I always say that I was the 5% (or whatever the failure rate is now) that got by! :lol::lol:

 

Nothing is 100%. My mom got pregnant with an IUD. I got pregnant on Depo-Provera.

[Luckymama]

Personally, I would worry that the lack of physical contact is creating more problems than it is solving. :(

 

Dh's vas was the best gift he could have ever given me.

[Lovedtodeath]

DH has had problems since his vasectomy but still says it was worth it.

[Lovedtodeath]

 

:) I understand you now. This is touchy for me because I have had women tell me that if I really trusted God I would continue to allow him to "guide" my fertility knowing that it would probably kill either the baby, me or both.

"Do not put the Lord your God to the test."