Any of you have a "missing" period of time in your life?

[the4Rs]

I honestly cannot remember my 4th grade year of school. I know who my teacher was. I remember going to my first day and after that I remember nothing of that school year. My next memories are from 5th grade. I have many memories from 2nd and 3rd grade and many from 5th on but nothing from 4th grade. Does that seem weird to you? I'm not "upset" about it but sometimes I wonder why I don't remember that school year at all.

 

Do any of you have missing periods of time in your life? Does it bother you?

 

Edited to add: I have a few memories of my homelife during my 4th grade year but school wise, nothing. The memories I have of homelife weren't the greatest so maybe I've blocked a lot from that year but they weren't horrific either so it would seem weird.

[twoforjoy]

I don't think it sounds weird. Unless I'm weird. ;) I had a really boring, conventionally happy childhood, and my memory is really spotty. In fact, my memory of most of my life is pretty spotty, even in my college years and twenties. I can remember certain nights during my junior year of high school almost moment-by-moment, for example, but I could not tell you who my English teacher was that year or anything I read in that class.

 

For me, I think it's that I have a tendency to not be in the moment. Most of the time I'm either planning, daydreaming, or worrying. My brain is just somewhere else.

[Stayseeliz]

I have NO memories of 2nd grade at all! NONE! Always thought that was strange..

[rwjx2khsmj]

I have a terrible memory when it comes to the past. I had a pretty normal childhood but if you want to know anything specific about it you'd be better off asking my sister. She remembers everything.

 

I do remember some things really well but most things are just gone. Truly, I'm suspicious of people that can remember all the details of a random day twenty years ago. I think they just make it all up.

 

My life now is riddled with examples of poor memory. I can remember some things really clearly but others are a blur. I walk into rooms and have to pause to figure out why I'm there. I tell myself it's because I'm distracted or trying to do more than one thing at a time. The dc know that my memory is like a sieve and they take advantage of it by saying, "Don't you remember when you told me I could..." Well, no, I don't remember a thing.

 

Just last week my mom and I were talking about my wedding cake. I couldn't remember what flavor it was other than not all chocolate (what I wanted) or almond (which I hate). She thought it was one layer of chocolate and one of vanilla. I thought it was marble. I think she was right. Granted it was 22 years ago and I only got one bite but it seems like something I should remember.

 

Dh takes advantage of my poor memory during arguments because he twists and turns my words or my intent. It makes it very hard to win an argument when I can't remember what I said five minutes ago much less what my point was.

[the4Rs]

My memory can be spotty and I don't remember every day of my life except for 4th grade but an entire school year is a LONG time to not have any memories, especially for a kid like me who loved school.

[Julie Smith]

Yup. But that's normal for me :tongue_smilie:

[swellmomma]

I only have very few memories from before 5th grade. Not just school but home life too. There is a few things I remember but most of my memories from before age 10 or so are from remembering the stories my families tells of my time younger.

[Murphy101]

I don't remember a single thing from third or fourth grade.

Nothing. I have commented on it IRL that I think it weird for me.

Not a single thing from those years, not even who my teachers' names were.

I remember a lot of first grade and second grade. I remember the teachers, who I sat next to in class, the arrangement of the classroom, dodge ball, that the steak fingers were disgusting, but tolerable if dipped in the applesauce.

Then nothing. Not even a glimpse. No teacher face or name, nada.

Until fifth grade, which I remember very well again. I remember the teachers, the rooms, the classmates, that I had a blue trapper keeper.

 

But third and fourth grade? Gone. Entirely it seems.

 

*I* think it is weird.

 

And no. Afaik, there is no unusual trauma to explain it.

 

ETA: I say grade, but I remember nothing of those years. Not my birthdays, Christmas, nothing.

[Sputterduck]

I have time missing from my marriage. That was due to extreme conditions, though. I remember my whole childhood. I even remember being in diapers even though I potty trained at 18 months.

[DawnM]

I have people from my middle school in the States asking to be my friend on FB and acting like they remember me well.

 

I have NO CLUE who they are! :tongue_smilie: But they are friends of friends who I do remember during that time period, so I guess they were there with me in school.

 

Dawn

[The Girls' Mom]

I have very spotty memories of my childhood. Probably half of those are things I heard second-hand. I even have spotty memories of parts of my adulthood. (The two years after my twins were born being the worst!)

 

My dh, on the other hand, has excellent childhood memories, and they go back to before he could talk. Crazy.

 

He definitely had a pretty good/normal childhood. I did not. I wonder if that has anything to do with it?

[kitten18]

I don't think it sounds weird. Unless I'm weird. ;) I had a really boring, conventionally happy childhood, and my memory is really spotty. In fact, my memory of most of my life is pretty spotty, even in my college years and twenties. I can remember certain nights during my junior year of high school almost moment-by-moment, for example, but I could not tell you who my English teacher was that year or anything I read in that class.

 

For me, I think it's that I have a tendency to not be in the moment. Most of the time I'm either planning, daydreaming, or worrying. My brain is just somewhere else.

Wow, I am exactly the same!

[Sherri in MI]

My memories of childhood are very random. I think that's pretty normal. Some people remember a lot - others not so much. We each remember different kinds of things.

 

My memory (including old memories) varies from day to day depending on my stress level & how much sleep I've gotten.

[Bang!Zoom!]

I have time missing from my marriage. That was due to extreme conditions, though. I remember my whole childhood. I even remember being in diapers even though I potty trained at 18 months.

 

Same here.

 

Sometimes I have to call my sister to ask her about "what was I doing about July or so in 1998?"- because I have no record of it all all.

 

The mind is so powerful about this sort of thing. If I didn't know it for myself, I would doubt it was real. It can happen though.

[elise1mds]

I'm missing parts of my life, but they're all from post-puberty. There are several missing months from high school, the first three months of my son's life, and a few months in 2006 that are just GONE. The rest of my life I have a pretty good handle on.

[Tap]

I only have about 10 memories of my childhood before age 10. :confused:

[Mothersweets]

I have a terrible memory when it comes to the past. I had a pretty normal childhood but if you want to know anything specific about it you'd be better off asking my sister. She remembers everything.

 

I do remember some things really well but most things are just gone. Truly, I'm suspicious of people that can remember all the details of a random day twenty years ago. I think they just make it all up.

 

My life now is riddled with examples of poor memory. I can remember some things really clearly but others are a blur. I walk into rooms and have to pause to figure out why I'm there. I tell myself it's because I'm distracted or trying to do more than one thing at a time. The dc know that my memory is like a sieve and they take advantage of it by saying, "Don't you remember when you told me I could..." Well, no, I don't remember a thing.

 

Just last week my mom and I were talking about my wedding cake. I couldn't remember what flavor it was other than not all chocolate (what I wanted) or almond (which I hate). She thought it was one layer of chocolate and one of vanilla. I thought it was marble. I think she was right. Granted it was 22 years ago and I only got one bite but it seems like something I should remember.

 

Dh takes advantage of my poor memory during arguments because he twists and turns my words or my intent. It makes it very hard to win an argument when I can't remember what I said five minutes ago much less what my point was.

 

Wow, I could have written this (except for the wedding cake part)!

 

Although, I think some of my memory failure comes from not enough sleep. I have a child that I have to check on during the night so I normally only have 2-3 hours of sleep at a time.

[Food4Thought]

My childhood memories are spotty at best. I remember I got a C in science in 5th grade. And the 6th grade teacher made cinnamon rock candy that I remember so clearly I'm determined to duplicate the recipe (but haven't succeeded yet, after half a dozen tries).

 

Otherwise, there's not much. Memory is such a strange thing. I have extremely clear memories from days when I was a toddler, but other days, even special days, are often nonexistent when I try to access them.

[Laura Corin]

I really don't remember much from childhood. It was a very long time ago, however.

 

Laura

[PhotoGal]

Wow, I didn't realize that other people remembered so much!

 

I remember my preschool and kindergarten teachers' names, but no more names until 5th grade. I barely remember 1st through 4th grades at all and what memories I have I wouldn't be able to tell you what year it was. I think 5th only stands out because we moved that year. So I definitely have memories of "the old house" but I don't know how old I was for any of them.

 

I remember a few high school teacher names, but not middle school or even college. I don't remember much about middle school other than being embarrassed in gym class when we had swimming and on the bus ride home. I don't have any clue what I learned those years!

[delaney]

I think middle school(thankfully) is my least remembered years. I really had a rough time socially, which is not like me at all, and I guess I just choose not to remember it, lol;)

[Rhonda in TX]

I have NO memories of 2nd grade at all! NONE! Always thought that was strange..

 

Same here. I even look at pictures of my 2nd grade teacher and think, "Who was SHE??" I remember K, 1st, 3rd, 4th, 5th. Middle school is kind of a blur, but I do remember some from each grade. 9th and up is clear. It was only a few years ago that I realized I remember nothing from second grade. Strange.

[RoughCollie]

I don't have many memories of childhood, not like people who can remember almost everything. The sameness of the days may have something to do with it. IOW, I remember out of the ordinary events more than the dailiness of life. Even now, unless I have an anchor memory for each day, they all blend together.

 

I cannot remember much about 4th grade. I remember riding the bus and that the classroom floors were wood. That is it. Oh, and back then, the boys would walk the girls home from the bus stop, and carry their books for them. No one had backpacks or book straps. Teachers, students, schoolwork ... I have zero memory of that.

 

I attended 9 different schools through high school and sometimes I think I would remember more if I'd been in the same school system all along, because I would have seen the same teachers and students year after year. My kids lived in the same place from birth until 2 years ago. They knew a lot of kids from age 5 on. It was really neat for me to see a teenager and remember what s/he was like in K or first grade. That continuity, I think, helps build memories, for me.

 

If I had attended my high school reunions, I would not have recognized anyone, and would have remembered only the very unusual last names.

 

My sister remembers everything. Or so she claims. I have my doubts about her memories when they cast me in a less than perfect big sister light. :)

Edited September 19, 2011 by RoughCollie

[twoforjoy]

My memories of childhood are very random. I think that's pretty normal. Some people remember a lot - others not so much. We each remember different kinds of things.

 

My DH has an insanely good memory for movies he's watched. He can remember pretty much the entire plot and most of the details of every movie he's ever seen, even ones he only watched once and when he was a little kid. I think it's very strange. He thinks it's weird that I don't remember half of what happened in movies I saw last year. (Sometimes I don't even remember I watched them!) But I tend to be knitting or doing something else during movies, so maybe I'm just not paying close enough attention.

[elegantlion]

I have a good memory. I can remember movies, TV shows, etc. I can remember falling down the basement stairs when I was about two. I have a lot of memories of a house we moved from when I was 3.

 

I however have some blank spots. I remember three things from first grade, not much from home life about age 8. I had to call my mother to ask my first grade teacher's name because it was driving me crazy.

[SeekingSimplicity]

My memories of dd2 as a baby are really bad, but I think it's because I didn't sleep for a long time. I was a zombie the first 2 years of her life. Dh has almost no childhood memories, but that has to do with his being in coma.

[Jenny in Florida]

My family moved from Los Angeles to a suburb when I was just a few weeks into second grade. So, I have some isolated memories "before the move," like burning my hand on the iron after my mother told me not to go near it and then hiding the resulting blister because I was afraid she'd be mad. I remember the earthquake in 1972. I remember visiting a school for gifted kids that I loved but where my parents opted not to enroll me. I remember sitting in the car outside my father's office while my mother went in to talk to him about something and pulling a paperback of "The Diary of a Mad Housewife" out of the glove compartment and starting to read it because I was bored. I have scattered memories of what we then called nursery school, and I remember doing that experiment where you float an egg by adding salt to the water in first or second grade. That sort of thing.

 

I have lots of memories of second grade: my teacher's name (Mrs. Grader, believe it or not) and what she looked like, meeting some of my friends after the move, playing tetherball, trying to walk across the playground during a strong Santa Anna wind, sitting in a circle for reading group, etc.

 

I have similar memories from fourth grade onward. However, I don't remember third grade at all.

 

I've often thought it was a little odd.

[SailorMom]

Mine is very spotty.

Both DH and close friends of mine that I've had since middle school will remember things that I should remember, and don't!

Truly, until about the age of 18, there are rather large gaps. It's odd, because I remember some things so clearly from when I was very young.

[kewb]

There are many things I do not remember from childhood. The only 2 things I could tell you about 4th grade would be my teacher's name and the boy I had a gigantic crush on. Oh, wait, and I remember how she always stabbed my cheek with her fingernail so I would have a dimple that matched the one on the other side.

[unsinkable]

 

I do remember some things really well but most things are just gone. Truly, I'm suspicious of people that can remember all the details of a random day twenty years ago. I think they just make it all up.

 

 

 

 

:confused: But why would people make it up?

[Jenny in Florida]

My DH has an insanely good memory for movies he's watched. He can remember pretty much the entire plot and most of the details of every movie he's ever seen, even ones he only watched once and when he was a little kid. I think it's very strange. He thinks it's weird that I don't remember half of what happened in movies I saw last year. (Sometimes I don't even remember I watched them!) But I tend to be knitting or doing something else during movies, so maybe I'm just not paying close enough attention.

 

My husband forgets he's even seen many movies. He'll get something from his Netflix queue, and I'll ask why he ordered that one. He won't remember seeing it. He often asks me if he liked it.

 

While I don't remember details about plot sometimes, I do remember which films I've seen and whether I liked them.

[melissel]

This thread is making me feel so much better!

 

I don't think it sounds weird. Unless I'm weird. ;) I had a really boring, conventionally happy childhood, and my memory is really spotty. In fact, my memory of most of my life is pretty spotty, even in my college years and twenties. I can remember certain nights during my junior year of high school almost moment-by-moment, for example, but I could not tell you who my English teacher was that year or anything I read in that class.

 

For me, I think it's that I have a tendency to not be in the moment. Most of the time I'm either planning, daydreaming, or worrying. My brain is just somewhere else.

 

Oh thank goodness! I really thought it was just me! I was honestly worried that something was really wrong with my brain. Not too long ago, I couldn't remember how DH and I came to be on our first sort-of date. I could remember how the evening wrapped up, but I had no recollection of where we'd been earlier that night and how we got there. That was kind of a big one to forget, and it scared me! But your explanation totally describes me as well, and makes complete sense. Whew!

 

I think I need to focus more on teaching the kids to be in the moment. I'm sad that my memory of my childhood is so spotty! I wonder if most people are like us and have spotty memories of their childhoods, or is most have stronger memories?

[posybuddy]

For me, I think it's that I have a tendency to not be in the moment. Most of the time I'm either planning, daydreaming, or worrying. My brain is just somewhere else.

 

I've come to this conclusion about myself, as well. My memory is so poor and I have huge gaps even up to the present. There are whole sections of my kids' lives that are just gone, which is devastating to me. I'm afraid I'm going to be a little old lady in a nursing home who has no recollection of her own life. :crying:

 

I have no idea how to train myself to be more in the present, especially when there's no time. It feels like a catch-22.

[melissel]

I've come to this conclusion about myself, as well. My memory is so poor and I have huge gaps even up to the present. There are whole sections of my kids' lives that are just gone, which is devastating to me. I'm afraid I'm going to be a little old lady in a nursing home who has no recollection of her own life. :crying:

 

I have no idea how to train myself to be more in the present, especially when there's no time. It feels like a catch-22.

 

Yep, I feel the same way about this too :( I've decided to start journaling--not just things that are happening now, but also things I remember from the past, because I worry those memories won't always be there! That and taking more pictures/videos. (Now if I could just find a camera that didn't need new batteries every 10 minutes :glare:)

[Murphy101]

I have been reading a book about what memory is and how it works. Moonwalking with einstein. It's a great read.

 

I'm guessing from what I've read in it that 3rd and 4th grade were monumentally boring for me and thus literally unmemorable.

Edited September 19, 2011 by Martha

[the4Rs]

Makes me feel better that I'm not that out of the ordinary. :) I too worry about my memory when I get older. My husband has excellent recall and it is maddening listening to him recount every little thing. I already told him I'll be the wifey with dementia or alzheimers. I asked him if he'd still love me then and he said "no" and I said "well that's good because I won't remember you anyway." :tongue_smilie:haha He loves to tease me.

[Trish]

Really? You're only missing ONE grade?

 

:lol:

[GinaPagnato]

I've come to this conclusion about myself, as well. My memory is so poor and I have huge gaps even up to the present. There are whole sections of my kids' lives that are just gone, which is devastating to me. I'm afraid I'm going to be a little old lady in a nursing home who has no recollection of her own life. :crying:

 

I have no idea how to train myself to be more in the present, especially when there's no time. It feels like a catch-22.

 

 

:iagree: This is me. Sometimes my dc will ask me about something in their younger years, and I can't remember. The worst is when ds asked me, "What was I like when I was a little kid?" :001_huh: I actually had to make some things up and speak very generically. "Oh, you were such a delight. Such a smart little boy.":o

 

So glad I'm not the only one. I was getting scared that there was something really wrong with me. Phew!

[twoforjoy]

:confused: But why would people make it up?

 

Human memory is a fascinating thing. If you ask a group of people who all witnessed the exact same event to recall it, even very shortly after the fact, they will have very different memories. It's also really easy to create "false memories" in people by telling them stories about things that didn't actually happen to them. I don't think people would make things up on purpose, most of the time, but I do think that it's very likely that many people have "memories" that include things they don't actually recall.

 

I do think that many of my childhood memories are a mix of what actually happened, stories I've been told about what happened, and other details I've added in for whatever reason. I do know that there's a lot of things I "remember" where I don't know if I'm recalling the actual event, recalling what others have told me about the event, recalling what I think happened based on pictures I've seen/things I've read of the event, or some combination of all of those.

 

I have what feels like a very clear memory of my aunt visiting me when I lived in my parents' first apartment. I would have been a year old at the time, though, maybe younger, so I doubt I really remember it. I think I just heard stories so many times about how she used to come over to visit all the time when we lived there, and I've seen pictures of the room, that it feels like a memory.

 

Memory is one of those subjects I just find so, so interesting.

Edited September 19, 2011 by twoforjoy