What is your catch-all answer for everything?

[bairnmama]

"Does (insert name of whoever is crying) look like he/she's having fun? Then stop!"

 

"Is that yours?" Followed closely by, "Did you ask?"

[cin]

She's not here, leave a message! (in answer to the 1,000th 'mom' by 10:00 AM)

 

Oh, I <wore those, used it, read it> yesterday. In response to the 'where are my <shoes, pants, book, game>etc. They all know better. Especially for the shoes.

 

NO.

[silliness7]

Go lie down til you feel better/calm down.

 

When I'm out of sorts lying down always helps...falling asleep is bonus. :001_smile:

[MariannNOVA]

"Good Grief!"

[Truscifi]

"Do you need to go to the hospital? Then you're probably okay."

 

"No, standing in the doorway doesn't count as looking for it."

 

"I think we need some quiet time."

[Miss Marple]

I say it 400 times some days.

 

"Mom, do we have any milk?" Scan.

 

"where is the tape?" Scan

 

"Have you seen my book?" Scan

 

"I think we are out of butter." Scan

 

I am told that this is a difference in the genders, but as the only female in a house of four guys, I have just decided that if men are not good at scanning to find things, I am going to give the more practice. But no matter how much practice I give them, I swear someone asks me every hour, "Do we have any milk" even though I have kept the milk on the same side of the same shelf of the fridge for ..... 17 years. Longer than most of them have been alive. They just want me to look for them.

 

:iagree: I call it "testosterone blindness". And, like you, I'm the only female in a house of males.

[woolybear]

"Go find something to do!"

"Separate."

"Stop following your brother around."

"Leave him alone."

"Maybe."

[woolybear]

3. Don't look at me in that tone of voice.

 

:lol::lol:

[Danestress]

:iagree: I call it "testosterone blindness". And, like you, I'm the only female in a house of males.

 

Sometimes I feel like it's a bit of "testosterone induced conviction that my time is more important than yours." You know. They are just too busy and in demand to have to actually look for their own milk:) It's funny though, and they do tend to laugh about "scan."

[rwjx2khsmj]

"Don't touch your brother/sister unless you are hugging or kissing."

"The last time I wore __________, I put it in my closet."

"You get what you get and don't throw a fit."

[Twinmom]

"You are right...life isn't fair. Get over it."

"You will live, I promise."

"Go jump on the trampoline. I want to see at least 40 jumps!"

"Yes, I mean NOW!"

"I said no and I mean NO!"

"I love you, too, darling!" :D (I have a lovebird for a twin!)

 

Oh, and I almost forgot: "M stands for Mom, not maid!"

[Luckymama]

Drink some more water.

Well, where were you the last time you had/used <missing item>?

 

And depending on the situation:

Check the dictionary/thesaurus/Google.

[Diane in CO]

"Go find something to do!"

"Separate."

"Stop following your brother around."

"Leave him alone."

"Maybe."

 

 

Wow...this is me at my house with my two boys...word for word :D

[Joker]

The last few months its been "You're a goober". :tongue_smilie: I don't know why but when they bother me that's what I say. They laugh and move on.

[Ali in OR]

"You must be tired. You need to go to bed earlier tonight." (works for most any complaining/crying, etc.)

 

"Drink some water. You're probably dehydrated." (headaches, other physical woes)

[OrganicAnn]

Recently

 

"That's great, but what did I ask you to do?"

(for when I send DD into her room to do something and she does something totally different)

[Belacqua]

 

If I start throwing things at squirrels who get too close to my birdfeeder and responding to complaining by rubbing two fingers together and saying "This is the world's tiniest violin, playing just for you...", the metamorphosis will be complete.

 

Or hold two fingers about an inch apart and say, "You know what this is? It's 75 pounds of compressed WAAAHHH."

[OnTheBrink]

"If it meant that much to you, you wouldn't have left it on the floor/where the dog could get it/at church, etc."

 

"Where does it hurt? Oh, that's a million miles from your heart. You'll be fine."

 

"I'm sorry; you must be confused. I gave you a directive, not an opening line for a debate."

 

"What part of clean the catbox/pick up your dirty clothes/take the dog out was lost on you?"

 

And my most famous and well-loved response, "Save the drama for yo llama cuz yo momma don't wanna hear it." :D

[KJsMom]

Is it broken or bleeding? No, then you're fine.

What did your dad say?

Because I said so.

You better straighten up.

[k2bdeutmeyer]

"good grief" - I say that a LOT

 

"You're alright" - injuries

 

"I changed my name" - for the millionth "mom!" of the day

 

"do you really want to do this today?" - when they start with arguing/whining first thing in the morning

 

"maybe next time you'll think then" - when DD is upset about a punishment/consequence

 

"we'll see" - also typically pretty much means "no" according to DD

[Chelle in MO]

Blah.

Edited July 15, 2010 by Chelle in MO
Same as always--I'm a dork

[Jean in Newcastle]

"Your mom is not available. Please leave a message at the beep." They roll their eyes but they will leave me alone!

 

"Pick up _________" (the latest thing they just tossed on the floor.)

[StephanieZ]

Maybe I'm starting to sound like my mom.:001_huh:

My two answers that seem to cover 99% of my childrens' traumas are

 

1. Go get a drink of water.

2. Go to the bathroom.

 

What do you say that covers it all? :001_smile:

 

& #3. Go take a bath.

[Chelle in MO]

:iagree: I call it "testosterone blindness". And, like you, I'm the only female in a house of males.

 

Only female here, too. We call it male vision. It's an amazing thing. I usually stand at the pantry or frig or by the cabinet under the sink and say, "Seriously? You can't find it? You're kidding me." Then, miraculously, the item APPEARS RIGHT BEFORE THEIR VERY EYES. Amazing, I tell you. :glare:

[Chelle in MO]

"Good Grief!"

 

I say that A LOT! And my dh ALWAYS replies, "Is there really such a thing as GOOD grief? Then I roll my eyes at him. It plays out daily.

[Tina]

I've shown my husband how guys look for things. Stand in the doorway, take a sweep of the room with your eyes, and say, "I can't find it." I'm assuming that's most guys? :lol:

[Chelle in MO]

I've shown my husband how guys look for things. Stand in the doorway, take a sweep of the room with your eyes, and say, "I can't find it." I'm assuming that's most guys? :lol:

 

That is IT, Tina! Some in this house will actually look through the air for something that couldn't possibly be hanging there. :001_huh:

[Danestress]

DH comes in every late from work. I have supper set aside for him. I suggest he might like a salad. I am busy but the salad is right there. He finds it. "Do we have any dressing?" What he's really asking is, "Could you come over here and read each dressing option to me so that I don't have to bend over. Bending over smacks of effort. Could you do it?" I didn't. He found the dressing in 3 seconds.

Edited July 15, 2010 by Danestress

[Sugarfoot]

"Sometimes that happens."

 

Seems to take the trauma/drama out of just about any situation around here. Lately, I say this A LOT...

[flobee76]

Oh my goodness... :lol: I am laughing so hard over here! Mine are:

 

 

1. Are you bleeding? Did you break a bone? Then... you're fine.
   
2. Just GO OUTSIDE and PLAY!
   
3. Drink your water!
   
4. What's in your mouth?!
   

 

[bairnmama]

"I'm sorry; you must be confused. I gave you a directive, not an opening line for a debate."

 

 

 

I LOVE this! I might have to steal it and use it with my dd. Now that she's 9 it seems like every request is open to debate. :glare:

[Alphabetika]

Maybe I'm starting to sound like my mom.:001_huh:

My two answers that seem to cover 99% of my childrens' traumas are

 

1. Go get a drink of water.

2. Go to the bathroom.

 

What do you say that covers it all? :001_smile:

 

I'm with you on the first one! It's become like a joke in our house. If you're tired, have a headache, your stomach hurts, you feel cranky and you can't figure out why.....what will Mom say? "How much water have you had today?" And, believe me, it's never enough!;)

[Alphabetika]

I ate it. (when they ask where something is)

 

 

DH's answer for this is always, "In your left nostril."

[Alphabetika]

Take an Ibuprofen.

 

All my kids are plagued with head aches. DAILY!!! They've been to the Dr. They take thier vitamines and alergy pills. It must be genetic. DH is the same. What can I do anymore. If you have a headache, go take an Ibuprofen. That's all I can say at this point. :confused:

 

(No, they don't take it daily, I'm watching, don't worry.)

 

How much water have they had? :lol:

 

ETA: I hadn't read the whole thread when I posted this, and now I see someone beat me to this answer. I put the ROFL face up there, but it really is true - hydration has cured many a headache around here!

[Alphabetika]

Look it up.

 

 

Oh my goodness. This was my dad's answer for everything, too. And it worked. We do it. I can still hear him saying it, and he died in 2006.

 

Hey, we're in Orange County, too!

[Alphabetika]

Oh my goodness... :lol: I am laughing so hard over here! Mine are:

 

 

1. Are you bleeding? Did you break a bone? Then... you're fine.

2. Just GO OUTSIDE and PLAY!

3. Drink your water!

4. What's in your mouth?!

 

 

 

:lol::lol:#4 is my new most-used expression because I have a baby who eats EVERYTHING! I see her walking towards me with an odd set to her jaw and drool pouring down her chin, I say, "Charlotte, what's in your mouth?" She gives me a little drooly grin and tries to run the other way.....

[Momma2Many66]

"Leave your brother alone, no, I said, leave. your. brother. alone."

 

"Because I said so, that's why."

 

"Stop looking at him"

 

And when I hear "Mom" every 5 minutes, "I'm going to change my name"

Edited July 15, 2010 by Momma2Many66

[Cammie]

We'll see (in an attempt to dely discussion on something)

 

Get away from each other!

 

It it was a snake it would have bit you (when they are looking for something that was right in front of their face!)

 

I have a maid...you don't (trying to keep my children unspoiled while living in India is not easy!)

 

This is NOT a restaurant

 

Are you going to take me to college (to pick up after you, brush your teeth, pack your bags, etc.etc.)

[woolybear]

Wow...this is me at my house with my two boys...word for word :D

 

 

Hmm......I've got two boys too.:ohmy:

[woolybear]

I've just thought of a few more:

 

"You are grating on my every last nerve!!!"

"That is NOT a good way to start the day."

"I just want peace....."

"Could I just relax for a bit, PLEASE??"

"Don't ask me to do things for you that you can do for yourself." (Usually said to someone asking for a cup of water.)

"My head's going to blow up." (I actually say this one a lot, but it's cracking me up reading it now.)

[chickenpatty]

"We'll see." I say this a million times everyday. That and "No." :D

[EKS]

Maybe I'm starting to sound like my mom.:001_huh:

My two answers that seem to cover 99% of my childrens' traumas are

 

1. Go get a drink of water.

2. Go to the bathroom.

 

What do you say that covers it all? :001_smile:

 

For trauma, yes, though I would add:

 

3. It will feel better in a minute.

 

For a neutral all around response to my children's statements I also have:

 

1. Mmmmm.

2. Thank you for the information.

[Mimm]

"I didn't wear it, I didn't take it off. So I'm not going to look for it."

 

Often said with:

"It has a place. Why isn't it in it's place?"

 

Also there's the classic:

"If it was so important to you, why was it on the floor where [bad thing] could have happened to it?"

 

For various aches and pains:

"Go lay down and rest."

 

For tattling:

"Do you want me to solve this?" (The right answer is, no. Trust me, you won't be happy with my solutions.)

[Cinder]

These are my sayings:

 

"Maybe you just need a glass of water."

"You probably need to eat some protein."

"When someone gets hurt, I won't be sad."

"Time for bed!" (when dd gets cranky)

"This is NOT a restaurant."

"This is NOT a hotel."

"Did you ask Dad? What did he say?"

 

That last one actually became very necessary as dh travels a lot for work and is gone half the time. My dc had gotten so used to asking me for things that even when dh was home, they'd come and ask me--even if they were just with dh. It's gotten better over the years, but sometimes they still come to me. Like the other night with ds2.

 

Ds2: Mom can we stay up and watch a movie?

 

Me: Did you ask Dad? (Ds2: Yes) What did he say?

 

Ds2: He said it was fine with him.

 

Me: Then why are you asking me?

 

Ds2: Just to make sure.

 

Me: Did Dad say it was fine with him if it was fine with Mom?

 

Ds2: No.

 

Me: Then why are you asking me? If Dad says it's fine with him, then it's fine.

 

 

Cinder

[Tap]

"The answer is probably yes, but let me think about it for a minute" (usually in response to me driving them somewhere/sleep over etc)

 

"Suck it up and deal with it" typically when they hurt themselves doing something stupid or when I have warned them already

 

"Shake it off" for a fall

 

"Did you eat?" "Did you drink something?" DD11 forgets and since she spends 1/2 her time across the street at the neighbors, I don't always know what she has or hasn't had.

[iquilt]

We can't control everything.

[kym]

Oh, yes, I forgot this one,

"Mom is currently unavailable. Please try again later."

[Diane in CO]

Hmm......I've got two boys too.:ohmy:

 

Mine are 9 & 7... I wonder if we say the same things because our boys are around the same age and are pushing the same buttons :D

[KJsMom]

Oh, I almost forgot.

You'll be fine, suck it up.

Why is this on the floor again?!?

Go pick up your dirty clothes in the bathroom. (Every Single Day)

Are you finished eating? Why is your plate still on the table?

No, super glue can't fix that. This one most often lately.

[Cinder]

I say it 400 times some days.

 

"Mom, do we have any milk?" Scan.

 

"where is the tape?" Scan

 

"Have you seen my book?" Scan

 

"I think we are out of butter." Scan

 

I am told that this is a difference in the genders, but as the only female in a house of four guys, I have just decided that if men are not good at scanning to find things, I am going to give the more practice. But no matter how much practice I give them, I swear someone asks me every hour, "Do we have any milk" even though I have kept the milk on the same side of the same shelf of the fridge for ..... 17 years. Longer than most of them have been alive. They just want me to look for them.

 

Oh, this reminds me of one of my mom's sayings: "Bend down and LOOK!"

 

I've used it enough times that if dh can't find something he'll say, "I'm bending down and looking and I still can't find it!" :lol:

 

Cinder