Curious: what does "free time" look like for your school-aged kids?

[SKL]

I'm working balancing the goals of allowing free time for the kids to manage, and managing our collective time well.

 

My kids are going into 4th grade (they will turn 9 in October / January).

 

In 3rd grade, we had "Friday Fun Day" when they were theoretically free to do what they wanted after b&m school until dinner, then we went to a restaurant, and then watched a DVD together before bed.  For several reasons, that doesn't seem right for this year.  They need more free time and I want to use Fridays for some specific things.

 

So I decided that this year it will be "Sunday fun day."  We quit the activities we used to do on Sundays (except for early church and Sunday School), and they are old enough to be more independent outdoors as well as indoors.  I work on Sundays (at home), but I'd like to walk down to the park with them on Sundays, when I can fit it in.

 

Today is the first day of Sunday fun day.  Guess what they have been doing all day so far?  Sitting in front of their DVDs.  It is beautiful outside.  Normally we don't do a lot of screen time, but I choose their DVDs carefully and everything is OK for them to watch - but hours of DVDs wasn't what I had in mind.  :P  I don't want to be militant, but I need to set some parameters.  Like maybe a limit of 2 movies total (including anything I might watch with them in the evening).  Maybe I should also set a minimum for the amount of time they need to spend outside the house.  Just thinking out loud here.

 

What do your kids do on a totally free day?  What are your rules for free days?

[Arcadia]

My DS10 will read all day. My DS9 would play Legos. We still limit screen game time on free days.

[Dmmetler]

What I've noticed is that when my DD first has free time, she tends to head to the computer or TV. So, for example, we just got home after a pretty intense week at a conference, and she's spending a lot of time bonding with her neopets. After she's been on a regular routine for awhile, though, she relaxes and tends to spend more time on arts and crafts, legos, etc.

 

In general, if it's a totally free day, there are no rules other than the usual house ones (don't hurt anything or anyone, tell an adult before you leave the house and where you're going, get dressed, brush your hair....). There are days that all I want to do is binge-watch netflix, after all (and I usually do pick and binge-watch a series when we go to our summer schedule). I'd hate for someone to tell me that a day that I thought was free really means "Oh, you should paint that upstairs bathroom you've been meaning to get to for a year" or "you should read one of those heavy non-fiction books that you've started and put down 10 times because they're boring".

 

 

 

[Halcyon]

I would limit screens.

 

DS10 would crochet and read. DS13 would shoot hoops, play ping pong, read, draw and maybe cook, if he had the right ingredients.

[rebcoola]

I would re-frame it as Sunday fun day instead of free day have everyone brainstorm what they could do during the day at breakfast and than just say we'll finish the day off with a movie.  We actually have a Popcorn Movie night every Sunday we don't cook dinner just make tons of popcorn and put out some lunch meat and fruit..  

[Daria]

If your kids aren't used to more than a few hours of free time a week, then learning to manage larger blocks of it is a skill they haven't developed yet.  Nothing wrong with that, but this might be a good age to work on developing it.  

 

In my experience, some kids need help managing screen time during their free time, but it's really hard to say whether your kids will turn out to be in that category based on just one day.  I'd give them a few more weeks to see how it it shuffles out before I jumped to the conclusion that regulating their own screen time wasn't going to work.  

 

As for my kid, he's a teen so the lines between "free time" and other activities is blurrier.  If he's going to the gym because he's set a goal of losing weight, is that "free time" or "an activity"?  If he's at the cast and crew party for the show he just finished, is that "free time"?  

 

At this point, my son has certain requirements that I set (classes, homework, sleep, chores).  He also chooses to play a sport, work a part time job, be involved with the arts, do some additional training, and own a pet.   After these activities, which he chose freely, he has some time left over, which he divides pretty equally between video games and other media, and hanging out with his friends.  So, he's playing video games during pretty much all of his free time at home, but since that time is limited by activities that he chose, it doesn't bother me.  If he chose less activities, I'd probably set limits on screen time if he didn't start to self limit.

[MistyMountain]

I limit TV to certain times of the day and never had a lot of scheduled activities so my kids are good about entertaining themselves. This summer they spend most of their unscheduled time outside playing with neighbors. My ds likes to build with his Legos and my youngest likes to play with playmobile figures. My oldest makes her own play scenarios and practices gymnastics.

[KungFuPanda]

So, free-but-unplugged is what you really mean. Personally, I LOVE to plug in after a week of structure. I find it relaxing and freeing to binge-watch a series or surf the net. It would be coma-inducing to do it daily, but once a week for a few hours seems reasonable to me. I'd be sure to tell them before the day of. "We're unplugged between lunch and dinner today, but other than that you can do what you want."

[Wabi Sabi]

They play outside, ride bikes, watch Netflix, read, play Minecraft, Skype with friends, build with Legos, my daughter loves to build fairy houses outside, they play with the kids next door, and do arts and crafts. I don't put many limits on screen time during their free time, but if it's been hours and they've been glued to Netflix/Minecraft all day I will tell them that they need to take a break and find something else to do for a while. 

[Mommy22alyns]

We tend to be plugged in, but when they're not it's reading, playing with various toys (LPS, Shopkins for YDD), or crafting for ODD.  Sometimes YDD will do different arts projects.

[SKL]

They were quite put out when I turned off the TV after the ... 5th DVD movie?  (They started before I woke up.)  It affects their attitude.  That is part of the reason I think I need to limit it.

 

I forced them to go outside, which quite offended them, but then I said they could play inside until it gets cooler.  They are now in great moods doing something mysterious in their bedroom.

[J-rap]

Our kids are older now, but we used to say no computer or screen time at all on Sundays, unless it was school-related.  Not because of any religious reasons;  we just wanted one day/week when they had to think of other things to do, and maybe instill different habits.  And, it was a day that usually the whole family was home, so we often did family activities.  Otherwise, if they were on their own:  reading, art projects, writing, board games, outside activities, yard work, going on a run/walk, practicing music, experimenting in the kitchen, etc.  Of course when they were younger still, then dolls, Legos, coloring, playing house, working on little skits together to perform later in the evening, things like that.

[regentrude]

At that age, every day was "free" after school. We did not have them enrolled in any organized activities besides piano lessons.

 

We spent several hours a day at the park playing. At home, the kids played with Playmobil, invented role play games with fantasy worlds, read books, wrote stories. In summer, we might occasionally go to the pool. On weekends, we spent one entire day hiking in the woods.

 

We allowed one film on DVD per day on Friday-Sunday (none Mo-Thurs, because there was too little time after school and too many other things I'd have them rather engage in), and computer game time was very limited. We are TV free.

[ScoutTN]

Mine play with lego, playmobil, or dolls, read, draw, or play outside. They ride bikes or scooters, play with neighbors, helpin ,y garden, swing or watch the birds at our feeder. Dd might do crafty things or write stories or letters. Ds might build with blocks and generally make his room into a fort. They often play board or card games, esp when it is unpleasant outside. They often ask to go to the park nearby, which has trails and a creek, but is across a major secondary road with no crosswalks, so I need to drive them. They have science kits and snap circuits and use those in streaks, then not at all for a while. This week they spent an entire afternoon playing with a couple of balloons.

 

We only do a movie once a week and they might watch an hour of tv 2x a week, WildKratts and Odd Squad, while I am making dinner. Screens are generally not a option for my kids in free time.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Free time is free time. They can do what they want.  Well ok, as long as it's not dangerous or illegal.  LOL

 

 

[poppy]

I think limiting screen time is entirely appropriate for 8 year olds.

[Critterfixer]

If the weather is good, the boys stay outside. They play at or in the creek, dig holes in the garden, play with the chickens, go hiking in the woods, ride bikes or swing on the front porch swing. 

If the weather is bad, they listen to audio-books, read, write, draw, make up stories, annoy the cats, brush the dogs, paint pictures, or bother me. :D

[Mergath]

My 7yo dd gets two cartoons (around forty-five minutes total) in the morning and half an hour of computer game time after lunch. Aside from that and when we do school, all her time is free time. She plays outside with neighborhood friends or by herself, reads, builds with blocks/legos/etc., draws, writes stories, and a million other things. I just tell her to go and play, and she does. We do stuff together too, of course. But I think she's a much healthier and happier kid with screen time limits.

[Rosie_0801]

The only screen in the house is my laptop, so there's no screen time without my cooperation.

 

Mostly dd reads, writes, does loom banding, crochet or hangs about outside singing and making grass dolls.

[Shellydon]

My kids play together outside, do crafty things, build legos, build K'nex, climb trees, take care of their plants in the garden, play with the dogs/cats and the like.  Screen is limited to about an hour a day, total.  No video games  in the house.

[lllll]

nm

[Closeacademy]

When they were younger, they would spend free time playing with toys and creating things with paper.

Now that they are older, free time is spent creating things with paper, drawing, reading, playing with animals and sometimes playing on their DS or watching Anime in Japanese.

[Jenny in Florida]

(I'm focusing on non-electronic activities, since that seems to be the focus of your question.)

 

At that age, my son read quite a bit. He also loved to build things and could keep himself occupied for hours with cardboard and duct tape. Add some PVC and/or a couple of pool noodles to cut up, and he was in heaven. He got his first sewing machine around that time because he had gotten interested in making costumes, especially costumes based on or inspired by favorite books. He was already dancing by that point, too, and enjoyed time alone in his room with a piece of plywood on the floor so he could practice tap steps. He was just starting to get into magic and liked to practice fancy card shuffles and sleights in front of a mirror. Plain old singing along with the radio or favorite CDs was always good for passing an hour or two at a time. 

 

I will say that, without any guidance, guidelines or prompting, he was capable of spending a whole day in front of a screen. But I found that, as long as we had some rules in place about how much of a day could involve electronics, he was perfectly happy to do a lot of other things.