Family pictures are a reality check

[indigomama]

We just had some family pictures done, and while most of them turned out really well, I look awful. Since I had my kids, I have gained 70 pounds. I feel like I don't even know the person in the pictures.

 

I have tried to lose weight, here and there, but don't stick with it. I am an emotional eater, and I love sweets, and hate exercising. I've researched eating well, bought a ton of books, but now I need to actually do something. How do I do it?

 

Besides gaining weight, I'm always tired, often grumpy, and my cycles are abnormal.

 

Could someone outline/ baby-step for me, how to go about making changes and sticking to them? 

 

 

ETA: I serve my family mostly scratch, real foods, but then I go an eat crud on the side. 

[Stacia]

:grouphug:

 

Maybe the Whole30?

[Flowing Brook]

Have you had your thyroid checked? Often when you have a baby it changes your thyroid function.  Hugs I'm eighty pounds over weight and can't stand myself right now. 

[indigomama]

:grouphug:

 

Maybe the Whole30?

 

I have read their book and briefly tried it, and felt good, but didn't stay on it. I'll reread it, though. Thanks. 

[indigomama]

Have you had your thyroid checked? Often when you have a baby it changes your thyroid function.  Hugs I'm eighty pounds over weight and can't stand myself right now. 

 

Yes, it's been a couple of years, but the dr said everything looked normal. I do think starting with a complete physical would probably be a good idea. 

 

What else should I asked to get checked? I really like my doctor, but she doesn't suggest much.

[hornblower]

I'd suggest http://www.forksoverknives.com/

Load up pantry on snacks you might like instead of empty calorie ones.

I also had a trick of telling myself I could have the 'treat' AFTER I drank my green smoothie. After drinking 400-500 ml of green smoothie, sometimes I would be so full that I wouldn't want the treat at all, but sometimes I would. The difference would be I'd only have one small serving, instead of finishing the whole bag/platter/cake...  :D

There was a study that putting a mirror on the fridge helped.

I'd also post your photo on the fridge or cupboard door to remind you of what your goals are & just gently train yourself to think 'Is this choice consistent with my long term goals?' before putting something in your mouth.

 

[Flowing Brook]

Yes, it's been a couple of years, but the dr said everything looked normal. I do think starting with a complete physical would probably be a good idea. 

 

What else should I asked to get checked? I really like my doctor, but she doesn't suggest much.

 

Possibly a full blood panel. Hormones, a high level of estrogen can cause weight gain as well as sugar cravings. 

[indigomama]

I'd suggest http://www.forksoverknives.com/

 

Load up pantry on snacks you might like instead of empty calorie ones.

 

I also had a trick of telling myself I could have the 'treat' AFTER I drank my green smoothie. After drinking 400-500 ml of green smoothie, sometimes I would be so full that I wouldn't want the treat at all, but sometimes I would. The difference would be I'd only have one small serving, instead of finishing the whole bag/platter/cake...  :D

 

There was a study that putting a mirror on the fridge helped.

 

I'd also post your photo on the fridge or cupboard door to remind you of what your goals are & just gently train yourself to think 'Is this choice consistent with my long term goals?' before putting something in your mouth.

 

 

 

Hornblower, thank you. These are good tips. I haven't seen forks over knives, I'll go check it out.

[Jyhwkmama]

I'd suggest http://www.forksoverknives.com/

 

Load up pantry on snacks you might like instead of empty calorie ones.

 

I also had a trick of telling myself I could have the 'treat' AFTER I drank my green smoothie. After drinking 400-500 ml of green smoothie, sometimes I would be so full that I wouldn't want the treat at all, but sometimes I would. The difference would be I'd only have one small serving, instead of finishing the whole bag/platter/cake...  :D

 

There was a study that putting a mirror on the fridge helped.

 

I'd also post your photo on the fridge or cupboard door to remind you of what your goals are & just gently train yourself to think 'Is this choice consistent with my long term goals?' before putting something in your mouth.

 

 

 

I wholeheartedly agree. Watching FOK changed my life.

[musicianmom]

I was you in June. I lost nearly 30 pounds doing whole-30 "lite," eating almost exclusively from the "Well-Fed" cookbooks. Cycles are better than they were, and it doesn't hurt to take the stairs anymore. I have another 35-40 pounds left to lose.

[fraidycat]

I wholeheartedly agree. Watching FOK changed my life.

Mine too. Tried it for a week, then went Paleo. LOL

[indigomama]

I was you in June. I lost nearly 30 pounds doing whole-30 "lite," eating almost exclusively from the "Well-Fed" cookbooks. Cycles are better than they were, and it doesn't hurt to take the stairs anymore. I have another 35-40 pounds left to lose.

 

That's great, musicianmom! Any tips for sticking with it? 

[myfunnybunch]

I agree with the poster who suggested a  thyroid check.

 

And pick ONE thing to change. We changed our diet a little at a time. Our first step was to stop buying soda. Then we made a commitment to having one green food on the table (and eating it) at every meal. Then walking after dinner. And so on. Sometimes a huge lifestyle change can be overwhelming if you try to do it all at once.

 

Cat

[Peaceful Isle]

I agree with the poster who suggested a thyroid check.

 

And pick ONE thing to change. We changed our diet a little at a time. Our first step was to stop buying soda. Then we made a commitment to having one green food on the table (and eating it) at every meal. Then walking after dinner. And so on. Sometimes a huge lifestyle change can be overwhelming if you try to do it all at once.

 

Cat

Great advice.

[JustEm]

Start small!  Change one thing at a time until it becomes a habit.  My first thing to change was only drinking water.  Many people can just stop drinking soda and be fine but I would just replace soda with juice and still not focus on getting the water I needed.  I went a long time with only drinking water (and one cup of coffee a day)  now most other drinks are too sweet for me so I can drink them but I water them down.  Soda I only have on rare occasions.  

 

My next step was to start exercising.  I do a cardio kickboxing class at my dh's work.  But when I don't feel like going to that or need something less strenuous I do Walk Away the Pounds.  The great thing about it is she encourages you to stop when you need to at the end of each mile. So if that day I only want to do a mile I only do a mile.  If I want to do 4 I do 4. 

 

After that I made sure that we had veggies at every meal but potatoes and corn do not count as a veggie.  It eventually turned into a green veggie at every meal.

 

I then made a rule that cereal is not allowed in the house.  It is just not a healthy breakfast so if its not there I won't eat it.  I get much more protein at the start of my day ever since implementing this rule.  Since my kids are young there was no fight over this since they have never had cereal in the house on a regular basis.

 

All those baby steps and more got me from 190 lbs to 135 lbs in a few years.  I'm not currently at 135 lb because of back to back pregnancies that have messed with me quite emotionally (miscarriage during the 2nd trimester, followed by pregnancy in which I was still depressed over the miscarriage and ate horribly because of it, and currently pregnant before losing the weight from my last 2 pregnancies.)  But after this pregnancy these are the steps that will get me back down to where I need to be.

[indigomama]

Start small!  Change one thing at a time until it becomes a habit.  My first thing to change was only drinking water.  Many people can just stop drinking soda and be fine but I would just replace soda with juice and still not focus on getting the water I needed.  I went a long time with only drinking water (and one cup of coffee a day)  now most other drinks are too sweet for me so I can drink them but I water them down.  Soda I only have on rare occasions.  

Clipped to shorten...

Those were great practical tips. I get rid of soda (I don't allow kids to drink it, but I do), then replace with juice, then just go back to soda. I love tea, but load it with milk and sugar. I can put these changes into place.

 

And with exercise, I often get bogged down with, " I can't complete the whole video, or the whole circuit, so why bother at all". Giving myself the grace to just do something, and not have to complete it, is better than doing nothing at all. Thanks you for responding!

[kristi26]

I didn't really read the other replies but have you tried introducing just ONE positive change at a time?  Like don't snack after 7pm (for example) and JUST stick to that for a week or two until you feel comfortable.  Then drink lots of water AND don't snack after 7pm...and so on...

[BigMamaBird]

I can't lose weight unless I watch what I eat AND exercise.  If I don't do both I just spin my wheels.  Start out small, aim for a nice 30 minute walk every day.  Maybe a family walk after dinner.  Or take up geocaching, my Dh lost 30 lbs. the summer we started because we were out every day, hiking through the woods looking for caches.  Anything you can do as a family is great.

[indigomama]

I didn't really read the other replies but have you tried introducing just ONE positive change at a time?  Like don't snack after 7pm (for example) and JUST stick to that for a week or two until you feel comfortable.  Then drink lots of water AND don't snack after 7pm...and so on...

 

I guess it's an issue of gratification. I don't see any difference with just one small change, and get discouraged. I know, I probably sound juvenile or difficult. I'm just trying to think through why other times, things didn't work for me. 

 

But thank you for the advice.

[musicianmom]

That's great, musicianmom! Any tips for sticking with it?

Pigheadedness, obsessiveness, and a daily weigh-in (right after going to the bathroom in the morning, before eating or drinking anything).

[Laura Corin]

I guess it's an issue of gratification. I don't see any difference with just one small change, and get discouraged. I know, I probably sound juvenile or difficult. I'm just trying to think through why other times, things didn't work for me. 

 

But thank you for the advice.

 

If snacks are a problem, you might consider the No S diet, also known as 'eating like grandma used to'.  You eat three good-sized meals a day (no calorie counting, no foods to avoid) but no snacks, seconds or sweets from Monday to Friday.  Then on Saturday, Sunday and special days (birthdays, etc.) you give yourself some treats.  It's very simple and reduces the urge to be snacking all the time, reintroducing the idea that it's okay to feel a bit hungry.

 

L

[fairfarmhand]

Buy a pair of pants that is ONE size smaller than you are now. Or just a fuzz tight. Hang them on your closet door. Try them on every day. 

 

See if your dh will do the grocery shopping for you. If he's a list shopper, that might help, If he's impulsive about buying junk it won't help you!

 

Don't buy it if you don't want to eat it.

 

I have to give myself permission for ONE treat goodie per day. So one fabulous chocolate. One small piece of pie, whatever. It's saved for after supper. And I can only indulge if I've been very good that day with eating and have excercised.

[GinaPagnato]

I lsot 45 pounds and have managed to keep it off. Here's what I did:

 

1) Drink tons of water. 96 ounces per day. No soda, no juices. Just two cups of coffee per day (little cream and sugar), and lots of water. I would give myself goals like finishing a water bottle before coming home from an activity, or before having lunch.

2) Religiously watching portion size and calorie intake. It's amazing how many little things I would snack on during the day, sort of unknowingly. I never ate too much at one sitting, but every bite, lick, and taste adds up.

3) Eat lots of veggies, and limit breads and pasta. I don't eliminate a particular food group (except meat, beause I'm vegetarian), but I limit many.

4) No eating after 6:30 pm. I go to bed hungry sometimes, and it's okay. Really!

5) Chew gum when I'm feeling munchy.

6) Vigorous exercise 6 days a week. I had to work up to it, but now it's just what I do.

7) Buy cute clothes every once in a while in smaller sizes and get rid of bigger sizes. If I spend $$, then I'm committed!

 

I am menopausal, and have a thyroid condition that I've been on medication for for the past 20 years or so. Yes, both of those make weight-loss more difficult, but it's doable. You just have to want it badly enough to sacrifice here and there, and get back on the wagon when you fall off.

 

Good luck!

Good luck!

[GinaPagnato]

Pigheadedness, obsessiveness, and a daily weigh-in (right after going to the bathroom in the morning, before eating or drinking anything).

 

:iagree: :iagree:

 

This, too.

 

I weighed myself twice a week when losing, and now about 3 times per week in maintenance. I know that I have to see the cold, hard truth in quantifiable terms because it's way too easy for me to disregard a slightly tight pair of pants, lol!

[JustEm]

Those were great practical tips. I get rid of soda (I don't allow kids to drink it, but I do), then replace with juice, then just go back to soda. I love tea, but load it with milk and sugar. I can put these changes into place.

 

And with exercise, I often get bogged down with, " I can't complete the whole video, or the whole circuit, so why bother at all". Giving myself the grace to just do something, and not have to complete it, is better than doing nothing at all. Thanks you for responding!

 

 

Leslie Sansone, the woman who instructs the walk away the pounds videos is wonderful at helping you not beat yourself up over not being able to do it all.  She encourages you to at least continue to walk if you need a break from the other stuff (side steps, kick backs, small kicks, etc.)  But it never feels like you've failed if you don't do it all or everything they do.  Check to see if your library has any of them and give them a try.

[Rebel Yell]

:grouphug:  to the OP!  And so glad you got the family photo done anyway. If I got sucked into out space by aliens tonight, I don't think anybody could find a picture of me from the past 5 years or so... I need to update ours now... thanks for the inspiration!

[Prairie~Phlox]

Myfitnesspal.com is great for tracking.

[unsinkable]

I know the *oh, gosh, I look like THAT* reaction to pictures of myself.

 

My best advice is a healthy first meal with lots of protein. Veggies, veggies, veggies. Some good fat, and protein. So like a broccoli omelet.

[Aurelia]

For exercise, my mantra is "Five minutes is better than no minutes." I don't always have time to do a whole video, or walk 4 miles after dinner or whatever, but if I can make myself do just 5 minutes, then I'm still ahead of where I'd be if I didn't do anything at all. And usually that 5 minutes turns in to 15-30, because I'm on a roll and don't want to stop. It also helps me to do videos with segments, like Ballet Beautiful, because I can do one segment, go do something else if I need to, and come back and do the next (or go on my merry way, if that's all I have time for). I also have to have personal rules like eating protein for breakfast, with no sweets until lunch (including soda) or I'm STARVING later and make bad food choices. I've lost 30 lbs so far, and hope to lose at least another 15. 

 

[imagine.more]

I am in the exact same boat! I haven't gained a ton but definitely am at least 10lbs over my ideal and mostly i'm just woefully out of shape. I didn't realize how bad it had gotten until we had family pictures done 2 weeks ago and I wanted to cry looking at every single one of myself :( (note: the picture in my profile is from 4 years ago and my face looked thinner then at 7 months pregnant than it does now not pregnant, ugh! 

[AmandaVT]

I had some weight loss success earlier this year and have plateaued - need to get back to it. What helped me start to see a slow steady loss: 

 

1. My Dr. told me to shoot for under 20lbs a year for a loss. She said that slow and steady losing is more a key to long term weight loss than trying to lose quick. And it's less daunting to think about losing a couple of lbs a month. For some reason, changing my thinking helped me. 

 

2. My son needs an afternoon snack. I do not. :-)  I will however have a cup of coffee with frothed up almond milk and cinnamon to make a homemade latte. 

 

3. I start lunch and dinner with a salad. Starting with a salad helps fill me up and gets some good greens and veggies in. I eat less of the main meal when I do this. 

 

4. Cauliflower! When I make pasta, I make half the box and saute a bag of frozen cauliflower while the pasta is cooking. I love pasta, but cutting it with yummy cauliflower is delicious and cuts down on calories. Also makes great rice when you grate it. 

 

5. I have a treat every night after dinner. Something small - under 150 calories, but it helps me to feel not too deprived. 

 

6. Potatoes. I roast a bag of the smaller (but not fingerling) potatoes up in the beginning of the week. If I'm feeling snackish and hungry, I ask myself if I want to warm up a potato for a snack. The smaller ones are 100calories or less and are nice and filling. If I'm not up for one, I don't need to eat anything because I'm just wanting to munch rather than actually hungry. If I do, then it's 100 calories that has a lot of good nutrition. 

 

7. I don't drink anything other than coffee, unsweetened iced tea (in the summer), seltzer and water. Occasionally hot tea. I try not to drink my calories. 

 

 

 

[Acadie]

Have you tried stevia in your tea?  It has a slight bitterness and doesn't taste good in everything, but for tea, coffee and lemonade it works for me.  It's a naturally sweet herb, so it's not creepy chemicals like artificial sugar substitutes.  This would reduce calories and help nip a sugar addiction in the bud.

 

I get the powder that doesn't have any fillers in it, so you use a teensy spoonful (the spoon comes in the jar, it's so small).

 

Amy

 

 

[Aurelia]

Another thing I heard recently is if you feel like you want to eat something, ask yourself "Do I want an apple?" If the answer is yes, you're likely hungry. If it's no, it's munchies. I think the key is to have apples on hand, though.  :laugh:  Also, I've made a conscious effort to stop buying junk food. Occasionally I'll get a small bag of chips or cookies, but it's not a regular grocery staple. It's harder to eat junk if it's not there and you have to actually get in the car and go somewhere to get it.

[Mommy22alyns]

In response to some trauma, about 4 years ago, I ended up gaining 80 lbs in a year.  I refused to get in a picture until now.  At the beginning of this year, I started eating 1200 calories a day.  It didn't matter what, but obviously you have to be smart about it to not be ravenously hungry.  I've lost 45 lbs and I've gone from a size 12 in January to a size 4 now. (I was at a high of 214 in August 2011, size 16-18.  I lost a little weight without trying and weighed 187 in July  2012. I spent 6 weeks modifying my diet and exercising and got down to 167 or so.  I stopped the diet and exercise and gained some of it back.  In Jan. 2014 I started at 175.)  I use My Fitness Pal to keep track.  If anyone wants to friend me, my name  there is the same as it is here.  :)

 

BTW, I hate exercising too, and I've lost every pound without exercise.

 

Me now:

 

[indigomama]

I had some weight loss success earlier this year and have plateaued - need to get back to it. What helped me start to see a slow steady loss: 

 

1. My Dr. told me to shoot for under 20lbs a year for a loss. She said that slow and steady losing is more a key to long term weight loss than trying to lose quick. And it's less daunting to think about losing a couple of lbs a month. For some reason, changing my thinking helped me. 

 

2. My son needs an afternoon snack. I do not. :-)  I will however have a cup of coffee with frothed up almond milk and cinnamon to make a homemade latte. 

 

3. I start lunch and dinner with a salad. Starting with a salad helps fill me up and gets some good greens and veggies in. I eat less of the main meal when I do this. 

 

4. Cauliflower! When I make pasta, I make half the box and saute a bag of frozen cauliflower while the pasta is cooking. I love pasta, but cutting it with yummy cauliflower is delicious and cuts down on calories. Also makes great rice when you grate it. 

 

5. I have a treat every night after dinner. Something small - under 150 calories, but it helps me to feel not too deprived. 

 

6. Potatoes. I roast a bag of the smaller (but not fingerling) potatoes up in the beginning of the week. If I'm feeling snackish and hungry, I ask myself if I want to warm up a potato for a snack. The smaller ones are 100calories or less and are nice and filling. If I'm not up for one, I don't need to eat anything because I'm just wanting to munch rather than actually hungry. If I do, then it's 100 calories that has a lot of good nutrition. 

 

7. I don't drink anything other than coffee, unsweetened iced tea (in the summer), seltzer and water. Occasionally hot tea. I try not to drink my calories. 

 

Thank you, those are some great practical things I can implement. I think that's what I really need help with, making those small changes, that ultimately will bring big change.

[indigomama]

In response to some trauma, about 4 years ago, I ended up gaining 80 lbs in a year.  I refused to get in a picture until now.  At the beginning of this year, I started eating 1200 calories a day.  It didn't matter what, but obviously you have to be smart about it to not be ravenously hungry.  I've lost 45 lbs and I've gone from a size 12 in January to a size 4 now. (I was at a high of 214 in August 2011, size 16-18.  I lost a little weight without trying and weighed 187 in July  2012. I spent 6 weeks modifying my diet and exercising and got down to 167 or so.  I stopped the diet and exercise and gained some of it back.  In Jan. 2014 I started at 175.)  I use My Fitness Pal to keep track.  If anyone wants to friend me, my name  there is the same as it is here.   :)

 

BTW, I hate exercising too, and I've lost every pound without exercise.

 

Me now:

 

 

 

You look fantastic! And I am at your high in 2011, which is higher than I've been ever in my life, including 5 pregnancies. It gives me hope. A few of you mentioned my fitness pal, I will check that out as well. I think I am way underestimating, the calories I consume. 

[ChristyB in TN]

I wholeheartedly agree with everything Hornblower said and I can't recommend Forks Over Knives emphatically enough! I would add Fat Sick and Nearly Dead, it's fantastic. I struggle with my weight, I have my whole life. I have to run every day to keep weight off and to keep the voices in my head quiet. ;) If I start eating potatoes, bread and pasta I simply put weight on quickly. I have to stay away from cold cereals and most processed foods and I never touch dairy products or my seasonal allergies kick in and I end up with pneumonia. I stopped eating meat a few years ago to see if I would feel more energetic and I do. Being vegan does not help me keep weight off, it just suits me somehow and I feel so much better. I hope you find what works for you, you deserve to feel beautiful.

[ChristyB in TN]

Another thing I heard recently is if you feel like you want to eat something, ask yourself "Do I want an apple?" If the answer is yes, you're likely hungry. If it's no, it's munchies. I think the key is to have apples on hand, though. :laugh: Also, I've made a conscious effort to stop buying junk food. Occasionally I'll get a small bag of chips or cookies, but it's not a regular grocery staple. It's harder to eat junk if it's not there and you have to actually get in the car and go somewhere to get it.

I love that advice! I keep a bowl of apples on my desk and on the reception desk in the lobby at work. It is surprising how quickly they get gobbled up! I am going to start using you question, too.

[SeaConquest]

I would see an endocrinologist to rule out insulin resistance and PCOS, especially if you have long, irregular cycles.

[Mommy22alyns]

You look fantastic! And I am at your high in 2011, which is higher than I've been ever in my life, including 5 pregnancies. It gives me hope. A few of you mentioned my fitness pal, I will check that out as well. I think I am way underestimating, the calories I consume. 

 

 

Thank you so much!  I never weighed more than 170 with both pregnancies, even including a month  of bedrest with Sylvia.  Now I'm actually smaller than before I had them.  

 

It's really a wakeup call when you start tracking.  And then after a while, you're wondering why you thought you needed so much food in the first place!  

[indigomama]

I would see an endocrinologist to rule out insulin resistance and PCOS, especially if you have long, irregular cycles.

 

I saw an endo when I was 18/19 because I had really wacky cycles even back then. He said, I had PCOS, but since I wasn't thinking about getting pregnant and my weight was ok (then) there wasn't anything to do. 

 

I need to find a new one to see.

[VeteranMom]

:grouphug: I fully identify with what you are saying.  I weighed 125 when I got married and am 187 now.  I don't recognize myself in pictures anymore.  I was recently diagnosed with PCOS and pre-diabetes.  Have you had a physical exam and blood work lately?  Might be good to investigate.

[musicianmom]

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Edited May 23, 2022 by musicianmom