What does your day REALLY look like?

[AnnaM]

I have always been a SAHM and we have always homeschooled. In the beginning I was very busy because I had young children that needed constant supervision. Now as they get older I find that I have more free time and I almost feel...guilty...My house stays clean, school gets done, lunch gets fixed, I cook dinner from scratch, and yet I seem to have several hours of free time each day. Am I not doing something right? I thought that as a SAHM I was supposed to be on my feet all day every day?

 

I am not saying what I do is easy, btw. Most of the time it is grunt work or emotionally draining work. Obviously that is mixed in with moments of immense joy and satisfaction, but most of the time the days are normal and routine.

[Carrie12345]

I sure as heck hope that's what it looks like when my youngest is more self sufficient!

[FairProspects]

Geez, I could only wish. I can't even get my oldest to do much independently.

 

ETA: And you have a Pre-K?!? How the heck do you do it?!?

[4everHis]

Yes. That is how my days have come to look now that I don't have anyone under age 5. It's a change I wasn't expecting and I think I need to now 're-think' the plan. What 'could' I be doing? Is it wrong to have down time? Do I 'do something' just to be doing something? I don't want busyness for the sake of busyness and yet I don't want to waste life either. Is that how you spell busyness??????

[justamouse]

Yes. That is how my days have come to look now that I don't have anyone under age 5. It's a change I wasn't expecting and I think I need to now 're-think' the plan. What 'could' I be doing? Is it wrong to have down time? Do I 'do something' just to be doing something? I don't want busyness for the sake of busyness and yet I don't want to waste life either. Is that how you spell busyness??????

 

:iagree:

 

I fill that free time with ....lazing around here, painting, reading, sewing, knitting.

 

After those years in boot camp with all my littles and no sleep? Te payoff is this time I have. In turn, my life is enriched and I pass theta on to them.

[MSNative]

I have always been a SAHM and we have always homeschooled. In the beginning I was very busy because I had young children that needed constant supervision. Now as they get older I find that I have more free time and I almost feel...guilty...My house stays clean, school gets done, lunch gets fixed, I cook dinner from scratch, and yet I seem to have several hours of free time each day. Am I not doing something right? I thought that as a SAHM I was supposed to be on my feet all day every day?

 

I am not saying what I do is easy, btw. Most of the time it is grunt work or emotionally draining work. Obviously that is mixed in with moments of immense joy and satisfaction, but most of the time the days are normal and routine.

 

My youngest is 5 so I understand what you are saying about less time on home maintenance work. Now, I'm teaching more - fitness, writing, foreign lang. and technology classes. They keep me pretty busy. I also like to garden and that can take as much time as I possibly would want. Oh, and my full time chauffeuring kids to activities job - almost forgot that one. Plus, we have a age gap in the kids and my older ones are starting to get into more challenging work that is taking more time for discussion and research for all of us. I think that there is a sweet spot after the kids get self-sufficient and before their work gets more challenging where you can find some extra time. Enjoy it.

 

Oh, we also volunteer at a place locally that welcomes kids - a hard thing to find. That has been great for us. Wish more places could have kids help out.

[AnnaM]

I think that there is a sweet spot after the kids get self-sufficient and before their work gets more challenging where you can find some extra time. Enjoy it.

 

This is kind of what I was wondering what happening right now. I suppose that just like the non-stop baby and toddler years that this season will pass all too quickly and that I should be enjoying rather than questioning it!

[Tarreymere]

It worked out like that for me too. Things just seem to go so smoothly once you get the youngest to that magic age.

 

 

Until I had a couple grandkids move in and now it isn't quite as organized around here. One grandchild goes back to his home in September, the other I have until next summer.

[Zebra]

ENJOY the down time!

 

I only have one and life has gotten easier as she's gotten older. But, I had huge family issues going on for years, and major family medical problems so it was like I had far more children :lol:. Anyway, after that crazy time that almost killed me, I now SAVOR and enjoy any down time I get.

 

Don't feel guilty. You do far more than your fair share when you have little ones, and just remember the you know what can hit the fan at any time in life! Grab time when you can, you've earned it.

 

I think as mothers of young kids sometimes we get so used to being crazy busy all the time that it feels weird when we aren't. But I don't think most of life is meant to be lived at a hectic pace.

[Kaleidoscope]

I'm thinking maybe I am doing something wrong as my youngest will be 8 soon and I still feel swamped.

[Jenny in Florida]

ETA: And you have a Pre-K?!? How the heck do you do it?!?

 

I don't know if it's just me, but I actually found those early years a little easier. School in those days was maybe an hour or so a day. My kids didn't go much of anywhere or have any kind of social calendar.

 

For me, life got much busier when my kids got to be nine and 10-ish. At that point, we were doing much more schoolwork together, trying to make time for field trips, going to dance and theatre classes, participating in homeschool group activities, etc. That's when I started having trouble making time to make dinner and do laundry.

 

Even now that mine are both teens, my days are pretty full. I feed everyone and do most of the laundry and all of the shopping (for food and everything else, too) and cleaning and cooking (except for lunches). I drive both kids different places every day, some of which are too far away to make it practical to come home. So, I spend a fair amount of time waiting around or running errands while they are in classes and rehearsals. I write a lot of my own curricula and lesson plans. I research books and materials. I devote time to finding the very best possible prices on school stuff. I mow the lawn. I bake most of our bread. I run lines with whichever kid needs help. I maintain my son's resume and take both kids' headshots. I walk with my dog. I try to make time to read.

 

It's not really a problem I've had thus far.

[FairProspects]

I'm thinking maybe I am doing something wrong as my youngest will be 8 soon and I still feel swamped.

 

Me too, but my youngest is only 5.5. One of the reasons we don't have more kids is that I have never gotten to the point where I don't feel swamped with my 2. I'm wondering if personality/difficulty level is one of the issues in play here.

[Excelsior! Academy]

My day seems a bit busier than yours. What ages of children do you have?

[fairfarmhand]

my youngest is 4. All my kids can go to the shower and come out clean. I only have to make one sandwich at lunch besides mine, and everyone but my youngest can pour their own drinks, etc.

 

I got a milk cow this year and my garden is the best I have ever had. I've wanted to do these things for years, but never figured out how to fit them all in. I also do a bit of part time writing for money.

 

I can read for fun, but I don't clean as much as I thought I would at this point because I am tired from all my outdoor work.

 

oddly, my house was cleaner when I had infants because I worried about them putting stuff in their mouths, licking the toilets, and getting sick.

[Kaleidoscope]

I don't know if it's just me, but I actually found those early years a little easier. School in those days was maybe an hour or so a day. My kids didn't go much of anywhere or have any kind of social calendar.

 

For me, life got much busier when my kids got to be nine and 10-ish.

 

Then maybe I'm not nuts to feel overwhelmed with 8, 8, 9, 11, and 11.

 

Some days are slow but most days are insanity.

 

When my 9 and 11 year olds were doing pre-K thru 2nd grade school was easy but I had toddlers who were difficult, sickly, and demanding so that offset any easy time then.

 

I wonder what easy will look like. Dh talks all the time about me going to work as soon as the kids graduate. I know we will need me to but I can't stand thinking about it... he's just sure though at some point I'll become bored and will look forward to working.

Edited July 18, 2012 by Kaleidoscope

[fairfarmhand]

Me too, but my youngest is only 5.5. One of the reasons we don't have more kids is that I have never gotten to the point where I don't feel swamped with my 2. I'm wondering if personality/difficulty level is one of the issues in play here.

yes, my oldest wears me out more than the other 3 combined. She is very intense (see the difficult child thread). When she goes off to camp or spends the night someplace, life here is just so much....smoother???? maybe

[jujsky]

I'm thinking maybe I am doing something wrong as my youngest will be 8 soon and I still feel swamped.

 

I'm in the same boat. I feel totally swamped and overwhelmed. It seems like either school gets done or the house gets clean -- either that, or both are done half-a$$ed. Meals? Lunch is whatever we have that can be thrown together and eaten quickly, and dinner (at least during the school year) is usually whatever I can throw together fast. Maybe it's because the kids are in a lot of activities so I have to factor in running around? Maybe it's because we have 5 pets and the house never seems clean? Seriously, you people should see the floor I vacuumed less than 24 hours ago -- it looks like a furry creature exploded fur all over the place. Maybe it's because my oldest has some SN and it takes so much of my energy to keep him on track and focused? IDK. Reading this thread about all these moms who have all this free time and are bored is making me depressed though! I must be doing something wrong because that's the polar opposite of my experience.

 

Edited to add: If any of you bored moms would like to come over and give me a hand cleaning or cart my kids to an activity or two, I am happy to help you out in the boredom department ;)

Edited July 18, 2012 by jujsky

[FairProspects]

my youngest is 4. All my kids can go to the shower and come out clean. I only have to make one sandwich at lunch besides mine, and everyone but my youngest can pour their own drinks, etc.

 

 

Wow, my oldest can't even shower alone or make himself any food. There are some fine motor delays and SN though. I'm with Jujusky, it's kind of depressing realizing how much time and energy my kids are taking compared to other kids their age.

[I.Dup.]

Mine are all young (my oldest being 10) and I have tons of free time. Really, the only thing I can do with that free time is get online because it's so easy to pop on and off. I have to do work during naptimes or after they are in bed. I actually need to fully concentrate then. :tongue_smilie:

 

I worry how busy things will get as they get older. One reason we aren't busy now is because we do no regular activities outside of the house (yet). Other than trips we take as a family. We don't do a homeschool co-op or anything. I like it that way. :D I can't imagine how busy I will be running 6 kids around to various activities. :(

[missmoe]

I have almost 5 teenagers (the last two kids are less than a month away their 13th birthday) and I also have free time throughout the day. I'm thinking about going back to school to fill some of that time.

[mlktwins]

I have 7 year old twins. They are finally at the age where they are more self-sufficient and need me less. They entertain each other. I do math and LA with them separately so that takes some extra time. I could easily keep up with the house cleaning once I get the last few rooms of my house purged and in order. I am having a hard time getting motivated to finish things up though and then I feel overwhelmed, guilty and swamped. Once I get to that point though, I see me having some time to do the things I enjoy -- reading, photography, and finally getting to the boys' scrapbooks.

 

OP and the other moms who are at the point where you have some free time, enjoy every minute and take the time for you without guilt. You have earned it!!!! I can't wait until I get there!!!

[greenvneck]

Reading this thread about all these moms who have all this free time and are bored is making me depressed though! I must be doing something wrong because that's the polar opposite of my experience.

 

:iagree: My kids are in a lot of activities so I spend a LOT of time driving and then waiting, I make almost all meals from scratch, which is a chunk of time every day (everything needs to be vegetarian, dairy-free, and gluten-free, so not much available off the shelves that is both cheap + easy), and just the general upkeep of our house takes a couple hours a day in itself. I wish I knew the secret! :confused:

[Elinor Everywhere]

My kids are 14 now, and we're starting high school this fall. I thin Rhetoric TOG will take more teaching time than I've had the past couple of years, but the rest should go fairly smoothly.

 

Once my kids could stay home alone, my world opened back up. I now play tennis 4 mornings a week and have lunch out with friends about once a week. I also can zip out for hair cuts or other appointments without having to tow the kids along. I spend a lot of time driving my dd all over the place, but I still have free time. Nice. :D

[Hilltop]

I'm thinking maybe I am doing something wrong as my youngest will be 8 soon and I still feel swamped.

 

:iagree:

 

My twins are 7 and I feel swamped too. What am I doing wrong?

[fraidycat]

How do you do it? My house was cleaner and less messy when my kids were younger. The older they get, the harder they get to deal with around here.

[marbel]

Reading this thread about all these moms who have all this free time and are bored is making me depressed though! I must be doing something wrong because that's the polar opposite of my experience.

 

No, no no! ;)

 

Come on, Ladies!

 

Everyone's home and family are different. There are big houses and little houses; kids who are very independent and kids who are not so much yet. People whose kids can walk to the library and the park and their friends' houses on their own, and people who have to drive their kids everywhere.

 

People have varying amounts of energy and need for sleep. People make different sorts of meals, some very easy and some complex.

 

People have different ideas of what a clean house looks like.

 

I think threads like this are fun because I like to read about other peoples' lives. Sometimes I get ideas from them. It's good to look at our lives, reassessing our habits and how we spend our time.

 

But don't take a heaping portion of guilt and self-criticism because someone's life looks different from yours!

 

Please? ;)

[Gentlemommy]

Alarm goes of at 5:50, 6, and I ignore it both times. The point is I'll get up and have an hour to drink coffee check emails, ect. before the kids get up.

At about 7 toddler starts calling from her room. Drag myself out of bed to get her.

Make coffee, start making breakfast for toddler.

Nurse her, change her. By that time dd7 is up.

I'm trying to drink my coffee but its cold now.

Put coffee in microwave, ask dd7 what she wants to eat.

She doesn't know yet.

I tell her we should start her therapy, since middle dd is still sleeping.

Toddler starts whining about something.

Deal with her, get dd started on VT.

Try desperately to keep toddler quiet and still because dd can't concentrate.

Toddler spills my coffee.

Stop therapy, clean up coffee, strap toddler to high chair and give her food.

Start therapy with dd7.

Dd4 walks out.

I snuggle her while still trying to do therapy and keep both little dd's quiet.

Toddler throws her plate at the dog.

Stop therapy to clean up the plate and food off the floor. Decide dog should eat, send dd4 to feed her (in the garage)

Start therapy AGAIN. Dd7 now decides she's hungry.

She asks for baked beans, which we don't have. I offer cereal. No go. She knows how to warm up a can of beans and add syrup. So while she does that I check on the dogs food, it's all over the garage floor because toddler found it and played in it. Sweep it up, throw it into the food dish and take toddler to change her diaper.

Dd7 is settled with her beans, so I decide I'll read her history to her while she eats. Pour myself another cup of coffee and chug down half in one sip, scalding my tongue and throat.

I get one page read and dd4 wants breakfast. I get her eggs made, and now toddler decides she is hungry again too.

I make HER some eggs and we all sit.

By now dd7 is finished and I decide she can read aloud to us. She starts, but keeps getting distracted by her sisters who have decided to replicate a Ringling Bros. circus act during breakfast. The dog has ignored her own food because there is so much falling under the table.

I declare breakfast over and clean up the dishes, wipe table and sweep the floor.

Toddler needs to be changed again and I send the two bigs to get theirs day clothes on.

It is 8:30. I am. Utterly exhausted, frustrated, and kids are running around wildly.

By the time we all get dressed and ready its 9, and we have to leave to go somewhere-

Monday-VT

Tuesday-coop/farm camp

Wednesday-standing play date

Thursday-farm camp

Friday-daddy's day off so we plan for family stuff

Saturday-errands

Sunday-church

We get home after lunchtime in time for toddler to nap. It would be ideal todo school then, but we are ALL in need of a break by then. big girls watch a movie while toddler naps. When their movie is done, I do school with them. Dd7 can only focus on seat work for about 1/2 hour at a time, so I try to get two sessions in per day. Then she will read aloud to me at least 3x for ten minutes. That hour only covers the three R's right now. We have 1/2 of VT daily. When she graduates from VT, we will use that time for history lessons.

After nap it's just as busy.

 

 

Lather, rinse repeat every hour of the day until 9 pm, when they are all in bed and I collapse into bed and veg reading WTM.:tongue_smilie:

Edited July 19, 2012 by Gentlemommy

[CourtneyBrooke]

If you have free time in your day, you can:

 

1) Enjoy it!

 

2) Involve your children in helping someone else: Visit a nursing home or bake cookies for shut-ins/take care of your neighbor's child when she is overwhelmed/Volunteer at the homeless shelter/See if your local church needs anything/Weed for the elderly/ etc etc

 

3) Go back to school/take up a hobby

 

For me, I have two paid part-time jobs, I volunteer at my church in numerous ways AND I went back to school. Plus my children and I are involved in many of the above-listed activities. So, no, I don't have any spare time, and if I did, I'd refer to #1 :laugh:

[Jenny in Florida]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.)

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

Edited July 19, 2012 by Jenny in Florida

[Mom in High Heels]

Now that Indy can read my days are much easier. Of course I've still got a toddler to deal with, but like Indy, Han Solo is pretty laid back most of the time and will entertain himself for long stretches.

 

Right now we're on summer break and Indy goes to day camp, so my days are cake! I get up around 8, get HS up, make Indy breakfast (sometime he makes his own) and then walk him to camp, come home and play with HS for a while, we eat breakfast at 9:30 and he naps from 10-12. When he gets up we play for a bit, he eats a snack, we might go for a walk or run errands. When we get home, I let him play independently (he's good for 30-45 minutes on his own) and the he eats lunch at 2:30 (he's doing that right now while I type-I'm at the table with him) and naps from 3-5. When he gets up, we go get Indy, walk home and Indy and HS play while I make dinner. We eat, I bathe HS, give him a cup of milk and he's in bed by 7. Indy and I sometimes play a game or he watches cartoons in my bedroom while I watch TV in the living room (though sometimes we watch together) and he goes to bed at 9. I clean the house and do laundry while HS is sleeping, but that doesn't take too long depending how on top of things I've been and the rest of the time I read, watch TV, surf the web or nap. Cake.

 

When we start school again in a few weeks, things will change for me, but HS's schedule is the same. Here's a rough schedule of our day:

 

8am-get up, get HS up, make Indy b'fast, give HS a cup of milk and play for a little while.

9am-get Indy started on school while HS plays

9:30-eat b'fast with HS (I don't like eating early in the day) while Indy does independent work, then put HS down for a nap.

10-shower and get myself together

10:30-noon-work with Indy on school work that requires my input and direction

noon-get HS up, eat lunch, feed HS a snack and play with him for a while

1pm-get Indy started on independent work while HS plays. If Indy finishes he's free until HS goes down for a nap.

2:30-feed HS lunch and put him down for a nap

3-4(ish)-read with Indy, so any work he needs help with

4-5-whatever

5-get HS up, play for a while then Indy plays with him while I make dinner

6-dinner

6:30-bathe HS and give him a cup of milk (we sit in his room while he drinks)

7-HS is down for the night, and Indy and I might do something like a game or watch TV

8:30-Indy goes to bed

 

And that's it. They're still pretty easy, but I'm sure things will change when HS gives up one of his naps. I'm not looking forward to that.

 

My boys are really content to spend time on their own though and have never been clingy or required my attention every second they're awake. I'm very, very lucky in this regard.

 

 

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house? I do, but usually on the weekend.

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.) Our bills are all autopay.

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them? We have 2 dogs. Indy takes them out in the morning, at lunch and in the evening, and I take them out before bed.

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day? Breakfast is easy-toast, sausage, etc, lunch is sandwiches and dinner is whatever I cook

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.? We don't have a lawn, but when we did, we hired someone, Indy takes out the garbage and recycling, I take my car in and James Bond takes his car in, I do my laundry and Han Solo's, Indy does his own, as does James Bond, and I do the majority of the regular housework.

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?) A bit of both. I take one Sunday afternoon every 8 weeks to plan out the next 8 weeks and use my summer break to decide what we're using for next year and gather everything up

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.) Indy's passion right now is Star Wars and Indiana Jones and playing with his friends. We play games (frequently SW or IJ based) and travel as much as possible.

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own? I help out with Indy's scout troop when I can or if they really need help. I also do some stuff with our FRG (Family Readiness Group-it's a military thing) and am a member of our Community Spouses' Club. Granted, much of what the CSC does is have luncheons and events, which benefit the local community, but still, I do stuff with them. I did more before HS was born by volunteering at events, but not so much now.

 

 

Edited July 19, 2012 by Mom in High Heels

[Jenny in Florida]

Lather, rinse repeat every hour of the day until 9 pm, when they are all in bed and I collapse into bed and veg reading WTM.:tongue_smilie:

 

It does sound like you have your hands full!

 

Here's my schedule today, a typical day for me this summer:

 

6:15 - Alarm goes off, and I get up, get dressed and go for a walk with the dog.

7:15 - I wake my son and start his breakfast.

7:20 - I feed the dog and the cats and give all three fresh water.

7: 30 - I pack his lunch for his volunteer shift at the theatre.

8:00 - I clean up his breakfast, empty the dishwasher from last night, rinse breakfast dishes.

8:01 - I try to squeeze in a shower before we have to leave.

8:15 - I drive my son to the theatre.

8:30 - Home again, I make my coffee and drink the first cup of the day while checking the boards and news headlines.

8:45 - I start a load of laundry. If we need bread, I get that going, too.

9:00 - My daughter gets up. (She does a lot of theatre and keeps late hours.) I make and clean up after her breakfast and check in with her about scheduling and life in general.

9:30 - I start work on the day's school planning tasks. This summer, I am pre-watching 22 American history-themed films and writing background essays and discussion questions for each one. I'm assembling a lab manual for chemistry and coordinating materials and resources for several other subjects.

10:00 - 1:45 - I do laundry, prep assorted foods (breads, beans, etc.), do whatever chores need to get done (lawn, bills, trash, grocery shopping), while continuing to work on school planning.

1:45 - I drive my daughter to her voice lesson, then go collect my son from his volunteer shift.

2:15 - I bring my son home and decide what's for dinner. I go ahead and start anything that will take any significant amount of time.

2:45 - I leave to pick up my daughter from her voice lesson.

3:15 - Home again, and I get back to work on whatever the day's tasks are. (See above.)

4:30 - Dinner prep begins for real. I continue working on school prep or bills or whatever in between steps.

5:30 - 6:45 - I serve dinner whenever my husband gets home and has had a chance to breathe. I clean up after dinner and do the dishes. I set aside left-overs and package them for my husband to take for lunch at work.

6:45 - I drive my daughter to rehearsal.

7:15 - I spend some time with my husband and son, watching TV, chatting.

9:15 - I leave to collect my daughter from rehearsal.

10:15 - Home.

Edited July 19, 2012 by Jenny in Florida

[Night Elf]

Now as they get older I find that I have more free time and I almost feel...guilty...My house stays clean, school gets done, lunch gets fixed, I cook dinner from scratch, and yet I seem to have several hours of free time each day. Am I not doing something right? I thought that as a SAHM I was supposed to be on my feet all day every day?

 

You're doing more than me! I have 3 teens. My housework could be improved and I don't cook lunch or dinner. We graze for breakfast and lunch, then DH cooks dinner.

 

Life is just totally different compared to how it was when the kids were young. I have way too much free time and find myself bored. I hang out on this board, read books, play PC games, play Wii games and once in a while I watch tv. I would love to find another hobby but I haven't been successful. I tried crochet but it was very frustrating. I don't think my fingers are nimble enough.

[Night Elf]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?DH and I usually do it together. We go once a week, but sometimes one or the other of us needs to make a quick trip in between.

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)DH does it most of the time, but it doesn't take long. I'd say it takes about 30 minutes.

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?We have 2 dogs and 1 cat. Well, the cat lives downstairs with dd20 but the rest of us go down and visit the cat and take care of her when dd20 is out. As for the dogs, there just isn't much maintenance. We feed them twice a day and let them out into the fenced in backyard multiple times during the day. On nice days, they are in and out all day. But opening/closing the door is just not maintenance, you know? I take them to have their nails trimmed every 3 weeks.

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day? DH does all of the cooking. I hate to cook and he kind of likes it. Our meals are very simple, usually one meat, potatoes or rice, and one canned vegetable. There are a couple of things he might fix that are a little more complicated, but for the most part, he is in the kitchen for about 30 minutes. He cooks meat in the crockpot a lot so there is little prep time needed at dinner time.

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?DH does all outside work. Mostly it's mowing the lawn as we don't have anything that needs to be maintained. Our little flower/plant garden bed has hastas and hydrangeas. The garbage is just placed into the can throughout the week, and rolled up the driveway once a week for pickup. We take cars in for servicing together. Our mechanic is about one mile from the house so getting cars there is no big deal. The dishwasher is handled throughout the day. We put things in as needed and only run it at night. DH empties it in the morning when he wakes up. We all help with the laundry. DH will usually start it and both of us will flip it and pull it out. The kids grab their stuff to fold. I fold towels and sheets. Both dd's actually do their own laundry.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)That has changed big time once the kids hit high school. We use an online accredited school and it's very similar to a public high school. They offer a 36-week schedule that I use to break into daily work. Dd14 finished her last class in May and will be going to public high school next month. I'm only working with ds16 now and he only has 4 classes at a time because it's all he can handle. We work no more than 5 hours a day. We usually work from 1:00pm to 5:00pm. If there is anything left, we do it after dinner.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.) This is why we're not busy. My kids don't have activities. Well, dd14 goes to a drama class one day a week, but DH and I take turns driving her there and picking her up. Otherwise she's on the computer talking to friends or listening to music and either drawing or messing with origami. Ds16 spends a great deal of time reading various things online. He likes history and science articles. He also plays video games, although that has slowed down because his OCD is interfering with his enjoyment of the games.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

Absolutely none. Back when I went to church, I was a Sunday School teacher, helped with kids choir and was an AWANA leader. But when we moved, I stopped going to church and now my faith is such that church isn't appealing anymore. There just isn't anything we know about doing.

 

And that is why I have so much free time. I'm just not as active as many of the moms here. We're truly homebodies.

[Jenny in Florida]

Here are my answers to my own questions, by the way:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

 

I do. I used to on weekends, but my family complained that I wasn't around to spend time with them. So, now I go during the week.

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

 

I do. My husband used to handle this, back when we could afford to just pay everything at the same time. Once we reached a point at which judgements had to be made and things had to be paid at different times during the month, I took over. A few things -- car insurance, both car payments -- are set to autopay, but everything else has to be paid manually.

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?

 

We have two cats and a dog. I feed all of them, walk the dog, clean the cat box, buy their food and treats and manage vet appointments.

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

 

Breakfast is from scratch except for the hash brown patties both of my kids love. Lunch is DIY. Dinner is usually from scratch or close to it. We're a vegetarian/vegan household and on a budget. So, packaged and prepared foods don't feature much in our meal plan.

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

 

My husband takes his car for service. My son brings in the garbage and recycling cans. My daughter does her own laundry. Otherwise, I do the rest.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)

 

I buy a couple of planned things or curricula a year, sometimes. But I rarely use them alone or as planned. Otherwise, I assemble materials buying used, finding freebies online and gathering books from PaperbackSwap and BookMooch and write my own plans.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.)

 

Both of my kids are into theatre. My daughter is in the process of making it a career. My son also dances, belongs to the church youth group and volunteers all over town. He's in the process of planning a movie with a friend. He sings with a pretty serious choir.

 

I drive, volunteer, help schedule auditions, help find monologues and audition songs, take photos for their headshots.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

 

Over the years, I've spent more hours than I care to count being "backstage mom" for various productions for both kids. I've taught Sunday school and coordinated activities for teens at church including helping them plan and run fundraisers and drives for various causes. I served on the Children's Religious Education committee at our church until last summer. I've ushered with my daughter at local theatres. I've run clubs for homeschool groups. I've sold tickets and concessions for youth theatre productions. I've made costumes. I do various jobs for the choir, including assisting with vestments, driving for out-of-town concerts, selling CDs during events, etc.

 

At the moment, my responsibilities in these areas are light, because most activities are on break for the summer. However, I am helping my daughter plan the theatre class she will be running for my son's co-op in the fall.

 

My daugher will run the aforementioned theatre classes. She volunteered this year for a local theatre festival, running activities for kids and managing assorted venues.

 

My son is in the midst of his second summer as a junior counselor for the day camps at a local theatre. During the school year, he volunteers two Saturdays a month at the science museum. He helps build sets and so other tech-y things whenever a theatre will let him do so.

Edited July 19, 2012 by Jenny in Florida

[-M-]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.)

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

My husband.

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

I do. For me, it’s a simple chore that takes about fifteen minutes twice a month. The bigger project was completed a couple of years ago, when I read, researched, planned, and finally created our current budget.

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them? We have two cats, a “super senior” longhair male cat and a young shorthair female cat. My daughters care for them. Miss M-mv(i) grooms them daily – combing their coats, brushing their teeth – and feeds them. Miss M-mv(ii) washes their bowls, empties their litter boxes, and tidies the cats’ bathroom. (Yes, the cats have their own bathroom. Heh, heh, heh.) Mr. M-mv empties, scrubs, and refills the litter boxes every weekend, while Miss M-mv(ii) washes the floor of that bathroom (as well as the toilet and vanity).

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

Generally, one – the midday meal. Breakfast is simple – fruit, yogurt, nuts, juice, cereal, milk, toast, etc. If we have eggs and/or oatmeal for second breakfast, I do make that, but that’s no big deal, really. Mr. M-mv generally makes dinner, which is usually a light meal in our family. He also makes most of the meals we eat at home on the weekends.

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

There are no hard rules about the "division of labor" at our house, but it generally sorts out as I describe below. (Note that any of us will jump in to do something that needs doing. There is little to no "But that's so-and-so's chore!")

 

YARDS: I mow; Mr. M-mv trims; the Misses weed and help me with the watering and bird-feeding. We had a monthly service until April, but they drove. Me. BONKERS!

GARBAGE: Miss M-mv(ii) collects the trash from inside the house and puts it in the receptacle in the garage. Each morning, Mr. M-mv takes that and the recyclables to the large bins outside, and on the night before trash collection, he and the Misses roll the bins to the curb.

CARS: I arrange the service appointments, and Mr. M-mv drops off the vehicle on his way to work and picks it up on his way home. (The dealer provides a loaner vehicle.)

DISHWASHER: We all load. Miss M-mv(ii) empties.

LAUNDRY: Everyone sorts, I wash, Miss M-mv(i) dries and folds. (She also takes care of dust-mopping the floors and vacuuming the area rugs daily.) We have one load daily, except on Saturday, when there are three loads.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)

For the most part, I have always planned my own.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.)

MUSIC: They each study piano – a weekly two- to three-hour lesson (with a theory component) and daily practice of at least 90 minutes. Miss M-mv(i) recently took up violin – a weekly 30-minute lesson and 30 to 45 minutes of daily practice. Miss M-mv(ii) has been taking guitar for more than a year – a weekly 30-minute lesson and 45 minutes or more of daily practice. (She often practices in the evening with her father, too.) Now that swim season has ended, Miss M-mv(ii) would also like to resume her weekly voice lesson (one hour).

SWIMMING: During the summer swim season (May to July), they have daily morning practice and seven meets. During the winter season (September to March), they will now have daily evening practice and meets at least two weekends per month.

ARCHERY: One class per week and practice as often as we can. Mr. M-mv practices with us on weekends.

HORSEBACK RIDING: Lessons once or twice a week, depending on the schedule. (Riding went on hold just after summer swim season began. We're in search of a new instructor now that the season is concluding.) They also like to do an afternoon at the barn working with the horses.

ART: They used to take classes at the local college, but the program has since become somewhat diminished. They do spend much of their “free” time drawing, painting, etc.

 

The girls do not yet drive, so I suppose I support them by driving them to their lessons and classes. I think I best support them by designing a study schedule that accommodates the hours needed not only for lessons and classes but also for practice. After all, they are practicing music for no less than 2.25 hours daily, often more.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

The Misses were volunteer coaches for each of the past two winter swim seasons, which meant that they worked with the less experienced swimmers in the practice before theirs. They will likely set that aside this year as they plan to pursue a volunteer gig at a local therapeutic riding facility. Mr. M-mv helps set up and take down home meets during the winter swim season and serves as a timer during both swim seasons. Last year, we also served as the volunteer coordinators. We're unsure what this year will bring -- the team is undergoing many changes; there will be more meets, longer practices, different demands, etc.

Edited July 19, 2012 by Mental multivitamin

[fairfarmhand]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?I do, but I usually shop in one huge trip at the first of the month. I pick up produce throughout the month, and that market is 5 min. from home. I can leave the kids here and run down there to get stuff real quick. I don't have to buy milk or meat because we produce that here on the farm.

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.) DH and I sit down once a month and do them together. Cash for groceries, so balancing the checkbook is simpler.

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?lots of animals here, but not all are pets. My 14 yo. cares for the chickens each morning. She and my 10 yo also care for the horses. 10 yo. feeds and waters the cats and dogs. I care for my milk cow and dh generally feeds the beef cows. I take care of cows water. WE HAVE NO INDOOR ANIMALS BECAUSE IT'S TOO HARD TO KEEP THE HOUSE CLEAN. :)

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day? Breakfast is usually cereal or instant oatmeal for the kids and I fry myself an egg. Once or twice a week, I'll make pancakes or muffins. Saturdays, I cook a big breakfast. Lunch is sandwiches or leftovers. I cook supper every night from scratch.

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.? My dh, oldest dd and I all cut grass. Between the 3 of us it is a 2 hour task. I take in the cars for oil changes, dh does the other stuff like tires, repairs, etc. Dh hauls trash off to the dumpster about 3 times a week. Kids take turns emptying the dishwasher. I wash dry and fold my clothes, my dh's and my youngest son's. dd 3 folds and puts away her clothes and I wash and dry. Oldest 2 are on their own.

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?) Mostly open and go stuff.

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.) oldest does piano, once a week one afternoon for 30 minutes. She practices every day. Second and third dd's take gymnastics, but that is right down the road from here, 5 min. away. Class lasts one hour once a week. Oldest 2 girls ride horses too. We all do 4H. This takes the most time, since oldest does lots of activities and horseclub. This is a 25 minute drive from the house in the late afternoon early evening usually for about 2 hours, most of the time once a week

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?I help with the 4H club once a month at the meetings. My dh teaches Sunday School, and we are all very active in our church. We attend 3 times a week.

Here is my daily routine.

 

7 am. alarm.

I get up, get dressed and go to the barn where Blossom, my milk cow is put up. I milk her, feed the calf and turn her and the calf out to eat some of the grass that is growing around the edges of the garden. They can't be left unattended here or they will eat the garden, so while they are dining, I pull weeds and pick stuff. After about 20 minutes, I turn Blossom and the calf into the big field and feed the meat steers some grain.

By now it is quarter of 8. If I milked, I strain the milk, and have to clean the milker. This means that I will be back out at the barn for a few minutes and back to the house at 8. I make my dh's lunch and get him out the door, usually while pouring cereal and juice for my youngest. (While I've been out in the barn the kids are up, and getting started. The oldest 3 fix their own cereal or oatmeal. )

 

After dh is gone to work, I fry myself an egg. I'll eat this in front of the computer while checking e-mail and the WTM forums. I usually spend 30-40 minutes doing this. Then I go downstairs and make my bed, change out of my barn clothes, comb my hair and toss in a load of laundry. The laundry from yesterday is in the washer, so I switch it, and dump the dryer clothes in the basket. I fold that late at night while watching tv with dh.

 

At 9, we start school. My oldest works pretty independently, and only comes to me with questions. Each year is different, so I have no idea what this fall will be like, but last year, I'd get my oldest 2 started on independent work while I got my 2nd dd's teaching out of the way. Youngest son is great at playing alone and coloring (he is a wonderful kid. The easiest 4 yo I've ever had) Then I do read aloud time for my 2nd dd and middle dd. Youngest listens some too. Next, 3rd dd plays educational computer games while I work teaching 2nd dd's math, english, etc. Periodically, I get interrupted by oldest dd with questions. If it is a long question, I address it at 10:30 when we take a snack break or at lunch.

 

We work till lunch at 12, when we take a short break. Usually after lunch my 2nd dd has some science and history to do. By then 3rd dd is done. Oldest usually has some stuff to do. Most days we don't have to leave the house until 1:30-2. Generally, we are done with schoolwork by then. We only leave the house 1-2 afternoons a week, so I can clean and do my part time work for a couple hours, maybe from 3-4.

 

In the afternoon, I clean, write, and grade papers. I also try to squeeze in some exercise for about an hour. This fall, I expect the older girls to ride horses in the afternoons that we are home. I talk to and engage the kids with all I am doing.

 

Around 5, I do some "Daddy's coming home" cleaning. I know I enjoy coming home to a clean house, so I try to get dishes done, sweeping, picking up and vacuuming in the 45 minutes-1 hour before he comes home. I start food cooking while I am cleaning up. The kids help with clean-up too.

 

Dad's home 6-6:30. We eat, and I wash dishes. I enjoy the time in the kitchen alone when the kids and dad are doing stuff together. Around 7:30 we get outside and play or work or just check on farm stuff. At dusk, I put Blossom in the barn and feed the calf. Then I come in and shower.

 

Kids are in bed around 9, but during the schoolyear it will be around 8:30. Dh and I will watch TV together until bed around 10:30-11. Or we will piddle around on our computers.

 

I get alot done each day. The kids help out immensely. I did not do all that I do now when I had babies. In fact this is the first year that I have enjoyed gardening and had a milk cow. Otehr years I was too busy or tired to consider it. We spend time talking while working together. My oldest 2 do their own laundry, and my 2nd folds and puts away her own. This helps with my work substantially. It cuts my laundry chores in half.

 

Saturdays we do yard work or farm chores. We intentionally do not participate in activities that will consistently take us away from home on Saturdays because that is our farming day.

 

Sundays are for rest and worship. We go to church, come home, eat, nap and go back for evening worship.

 

This is the ideal day, but some days are crazier than others. If my intense oldest dd has a drama fit (they can last for hours), our whole day can get sidelined, or if we have a sick animal that can mess things up too. Sick kids, doctors appointments, etc. mess things up, but I try not to let that sidetrack up for more than a day or two.

 

It is much easier now to do much more that it was when I had babies and toddlers, although I clean less now than I did then. I'd rather work outside nowadays. I do keep the common areas of the house fairly clean and picked up, but I largely ignore the kids' rooms, as long as I can safely walk in there at night without killing myself. I do make them clean up on Saturday mornings, usually while I am cooking breakfast.

 

My kids are 14, 10, 7, and 4.

Edited July 19, 2012 by fairfarmhand

[-M-]

The OP asked, "What does your day really look like?"

 

Here's a fairly typical day from earlier this month:

 

4:30 a.m. My alarm. Make bed. Eat yogurt. Bike 9.28 miles.

 

5:15 a.m. My daughters’ alarm. Make beds. Complete a few daily house and pet chores with Dad. Eat bananas, yogurt, nuts, and juice.

 

6 a.m. Husband takes daughters to swim practice early so they can assist with pool set-up (lane lines, blocks, etc.) and heads to work. I groom, take care of a few daily house chores (setting up washer load and polishing furniture, for example), and use the time until they need to be picked up to read, correspond, write/work, and take care of online banking.

 

8 a.m. Pick up daughters.

 

8:15 a.m. They eat another breakfast – sandwiches and fruit – groom and practice violin (older) and guitar (younger). I read and write/work.

 

9 :30 a.m.-ish until 12:45 p.m.-ish. I teach the day’s math and lit lessons and participate in a Spanish program with them. (During summer swim season, we follow a reduced schedule.) I check in with each of them regarding their independent study projects.

 

1 p.m.-ish. Midday meal. Sometimes I cook, and sometimes I order in. On this day, I prepare shrimp burros – shrimp, onions, peppers, tomatoes quick-cooked in a pan with seasoning and olive oil and served in warm flour tortillas with spinach leaves, rice, and cheddar cheese, and we watch a science lecture from our series while we eat. In general, I clean as I cook, and my daughters tidy up anything that remains.

 

1:30-4:30 p.m. They take turns at the piano; whoever is not practicing works on studies and independent projects and/or art. I read, write/work, and attend to any necessary family or house chores. I grade their assignments as they are completed. They pack sandwiches, snacks, water, and everything else they need for swim meet and don team suits under jeans and t-shirts.

 

5 p.m. Archery class for the three of us.

 

5:30 p.m. My husband picks up the girls (and their bags!) from the archery range before class ends to bring them to the pool for warm-up. (We had only two such conflicts this season, thank goodness.) I finish class, take down all three bows, and drive to the pool to see two of their events and ensure that they have everything they need. My husband, who attends all of the meets, fulfills our family’s volunteer requirement by timing the second half of the meet. (Yes, during summer swim season, he leaves work early or works from home on meet days.)

 

7 p.m. I return home, shower, grade one remaining assignment, review the day’s Spanish lesson, and read. I also send several emails, proofread an article, and call my sister. My husband sends me regular meet updates, including short, funny videos.

 

9:30 p.m. They return from the meet, shower, chat, empty and refill swim bags, etc.

 

10:30 p.m. Bedtime. We usually try to get to bed by 9:15 during summer swim season, but on meet nights, that’s impossible.

 

My daughters are 14.5 and 16 now. For an idea of how our days flowed when they were younger and my son was still at home, check out these real-time "day in the life" posts: here and here.

[AnnaM]

I do have fairly compliant and easy going children. Not for anything I have done, but just because they come by it naturally. They play very well by themselves most of the day. School is rarely a real struggle if I am honest.

 

We also do not participate in a bunch of outside activities. We tried that once and besides the ginormous expense of having 3 kids in activities it stressed me out and it stressed the kids out. We are just happy being at home. We do go out about once a week with other homeschooling friends, but that is less than a mile from my house.

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house? Both of us do but we do it on weekends

 

2. Who pays the bills? My DH takes care of this

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them? We have a cat. My DH took over cat duty when I was pg with my youngest and I never took it back, but that takes all of 5 minutes.

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day? I average 2 meals a day. Usually breakfast and dinner.

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.? That would be both of us. He usually does the "man" jobs like the lawn and I do the dishwasher, laundry and so on.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?) I am eclectic. I pick and choose and plan it all out.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? My girls would rather be at home painting and playing lego. We do Upward every now and then if they want. My son just wants to be where I am at this point.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own? My children are too young to do many volunteer activities right now. I just quit teaching Sunday School. I do not feel like I have to do these things just because I have free time. My focus is my children and my husband and I like it that way.

[Dory]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

I do. Every once in awhile I ask my hubby to pick something up for me, but it's the exception, not the rule.

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

I do. I sit down twice a month and make sure they all get paid. Usually I have a discussion with dh afterwards if there are any concerns about being off budget.

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?

My ds8 takes care of his own cat and is pet sitting a shih tzu right now. My dd7 takes care of her own dog except for grooming which I do. My dh takes care of exercising the dog that he considers his, and I take care of the other 3 as well as the other boarder (that includes my ds5's dog).

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

Usually I only cook 2 meals a week that aren't from scratch. I plan in those so that I have some down time when it comes to meal making. Otherwise, everything is from scratch around here.

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

I usually mow the lawn, the garbage and recycling is shared pretty much half/half. Taking care of the cars is normally dh's department, although if we are souping up the dune buggy or playing with an old care I'm always game to join in :D. Emptying the dishwasher is shared. Whoever is there, does it, although we are starting to get the kids to do it more often now. Laundry is my job, although the kids do a lot of that now too.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)

I have a mishmash of a few things around here. SOTW, FLL, MM and SP, AAS, RS Hebrew and Easy Hebrew, and I actually can't remember the rest of my material off the top of my head. I like to buy a couple things I like alright and pick and choose through them to make one good curriculum.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.)

My kids are, for the most part, young enough they don't have really intense hobbies. My ds5 LOVES his music and for that I drive an extra couple hours to make sure he's going to a piano teacher that's well suited to him. They are all involved in various different activities, but nothing big yet. My ds8 has always shown interest in all things mechanical, but as of yet, he's too young to do anything with it except play with his dad in the shop.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

Our church has teams that take turns with clean up and set up for events that are happening and I'm on one of the teams. I used to teach Sunday School, but not for a few years now. I have really pulled back a lot and am focusing on my own stuff.

 

 

I'm not one the women with extra time, but I thought I'd answer the questions anyway. I can't stand having extra time on my hands. With all the dogs, the horses, the cows, and the extra kids here though, I don't think I will ever be one of those women. I have to push just to have my time at the computer and usually I have it in spurts throughout the day. I just leave the computer on and check it every so often to see what's going on.

I hit the ground running at 6am. Check the cows, if one of them in lactating (neither is right now), I milk the cow. Check the horses, let all the dogs out of their beds. Come inside to make breakfast for the kidlets by 8am. 8:30 the extra 3 kids come in the door. Usually the kids are free to run and play in the mornings during the summer as it's not as hot then. I get any household chores done and if I'm making cheese or bread I get it started then. 11:30 I start in on making lunch. During lunch I read to the kids. After lunch the youngest goes down for a nap and the other 5 settle down for some school. By 2-2:30pm we're done with school and I head out to work with the dogs and horses for a bit if the weather is good and I chase the kids outside where I can see them. 4pm I head back in to start supper. Supper around here is at 5-6pm. The extra 3 kids leave right after supper. After supper I try and get two kids through the shower. They get a story and then head to bed. I head back outside to continue working with the animals. At 8 I milk if my dh isn't home, if he is home he takes care of it for the evening. At 9 I head back inside to finish up any household chores that are still needing to be done. Sit down for 30 minutes to unwind and then hit the hay.

 

I should add that usually I only sleep for a couple hours then I'm up and continuing to clean the house. Sometimes I'll head back to bed eventually for some more sleep, sometimes not, but a large chunk of my house cleaning is done in the middle of the night.

Edited July 21, 2012 by Dory

[Jenny in Florida]

I do not feel like I have to do these things just because I have free time. My focus is my children and my husband and I like it that way.

 

Oh, I don't think anyone is suggesting you have to do anything. I'm just curious about how moms have lots of free time. My hunch was that I don't have that free time because I do more stuff. And, so far, that seems to be mostly true.

 

This is in no way a judgement. I don't feel superior because I do more. I was honestly just curious.

[I.Dup.]

I do not feel like I have to do these things just because I have free time. My focus is my children and my husband and I like it that way.

 

I agree and I have my hands plenty full at home.

 

I do have more free time, but I don't see why we have to be grilled about it? I do think the "busier" people are in our society, the more of a superiority complex they have.

 

http://www.cnn.com/2012/07/17/opinion/pearlman-end-game-kids/index.html

 

I can't find the other article I was going to link on this, but it was about this very thing.

[AnnaM]

Oh, I don't think anyone is suggesting you have to do anything. I'm just curious about how moms have lots of free time. My hunch was that I don't have that free time because I do more stuff. And, so far, that seems to be mostly true.

 

This is in no way a judgement. I don't feel superior because I do more. I was honestly just curious.

 

 

Oh it wasn't taken that way at all. Sorry to have sounded so harsh :)

[Halcyon]

So, those of you who have all that free time, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to answer a few questions:

 

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

 

Both of us do. We alternate. He likes shopping in the big box stores and I hate it, so I generally do the Publix runs.

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.) DH does, except for one credit card bill. He takes them to his office and pays for them in peace and quiet. I was late one time paying a bill and he insisted on doing it himself and I guess I let him twist my arm. :tongue_smilie:

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them? We have two dogs and a cat. Mostly I do the feeding, but that's because one of the dogs is new and I am still watching him, his food intake etc. The kids will begin doing this in a couple of weeks.

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day? I cook mostly from scatch, but I also make sandwiches, oatmeal and such that doesn't take a lot of time. We get pizza or takeout once a week, and some days I make really simple dinners.

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.? I do almost all that but get help. I mow the lawn (I like to), we both take out garbage, or my kids do. The kids empty the dishwasher, wipe down the table after meals and clean their sinks. I do laundry, DH takes in the cars for service.

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?)Create my own using mostly classical resources. No boxed curriculum.

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.) Both kids will be doing inline hockey this fall, I generally take them to their practices and games. They have piano weekly, and both like to do a lot of crafts so there are multiple Michael's trips each month. Younger also does tap, but not sure if we will continue that. Oh, and I am going to be leading a World Geography coop in the fall, so that will keep us busy Monday afternoons!

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own?

RIght now, I just shop for the soup kitchen, but I hope we will all be volunteering at an animal shelter once the kids are older.

[ereks mom]

I don't know if it's just me, but I actually found those early years a little easier. School in those days was maybe an hour or so a day. My kids didn't go much of anywhere or have any kind of social calendar.

 

For me, life got much busier when my kids got to be nine and 10-ish. At that point, we were doing much more schoolwork together, trying to make time for field trips, going to dance and theatre classes, participating in homeschool group activities, etc. That's when I started having trouble making time to make dinner and do laundry.

 

Even now that mine are both teens, my days are pretty full. I feed everyone and do most of the laundry and all of the shopping (for food and everything else, too) and cleaning and cooking (except for lunches). I drive both kids different places every day, some of which are too far away to make it practical to come home. So, I spend a fair amount of time waiting around or running errands while they are in classes and rehearsals. I write a lot of my own curricula and lesson plans. I research books and materials. I devote time to finding the very best possible prices on school stuff. I mow the lawn. I bake most of our bread. I run lines with whichever kid needs help. I maintain my son's resume and take both kids' headshots. I walk with my dog. I try to make time to read.

 

It's not really a problem I've had thus far.

 

Sounds a lot like me. Except that I don't mow the lawn. But I have a flower garden that needs a little attention now & then.

[Jenny in Florida]

I do have more free time, but I don't see why we have to be grilled about it? I do think the "busier" people are in our society, the more of a superiority complex they have.

 

I truly apologize if anyone felt "grilled." That was not at all my intention is asking my qeuestions.

 

Here's how I see this conversation:

 

1. OP asks if other moms have noticed they have more time on their hands once kids reach a certain age.

2. A few folks agree, even mentioning that they are bored and lonely sometimes.

3. A few others admit that we don't seem to have any extra time and wonder what we're doing differently? Are we doing something "wrong?"

4. I post a few questions that occur to me and ask if folks who find they have all the time would mind answering.

5. Some folks get offended and feel like they are being grilled or judged.

 

For the record, I have no "superiority complex" at all. If you knew me in person, you'd think that was a really funny idea.

 

I was trying to understand.

 

I completely respect and admire families who make choices that are right for themselves and stick to them. I was trying to get a picture of what choices these families are making that provide them with a different kind of life from my own.

 

Again, I apologize if anything I said was offensive.

[Dory]

I truly apologize if anyone felt "grilled." That was not at all my intention is asking my qeuestions.

 

Here's how I see this conversation:

 

1. OP asks if other moms have noticed they have more time on their hands once kids reach a certain age.

2. A few folks agree, even mentioning that they are bored and lonely sometimes.

3. A few others admit that we don't seem to have any extra time and wonder what we're doing differently? Are we doing something "wrong?"

4. I post a few questions that occur to me and ask if folks who find they have all the time would mind answering.

5. Some folks get offended and feel like they are being grilled or judged.

 

For the record, I have no "superiority complex" at all. If you knew me in person, you'd think that was a really funny idea.

 

I was trying to understand.

 

I completely respect and admire families who make choices that are right for themselves and stick to them. I was trying to get a picture of what choices these families are making that provide them with a different kind of life from my own.

 

Again, I apologize if anything I said was offensive.

 

I thought your train of thought was fairly logical. I was thinking along the same lines and didn't feel grilled in the least.

[MiniBlondes]

1. Who does the grocery shopping in your house?

Me. I plan meals and coupon and I'm OCD over the groceries. :lol:

 

2. Who pays the bills? (I don't mean who makes the money, but who actually sits down and pays them.)

DH does.

 

3. Do you (or your children) have pets? If so, who takes care of them?

Oldest DD feeds/waters the hermit crabs. We share the cats because none of us enjoy cleaning the cat box. We also share the dog. I take care of the fish.

 

4. How many meals do you cook from scratch each day?

I rarely make breakfast from scratch. Lunch is always something simple like a sandwich and fruit. I make dinner from scratch about 6 nights a week. But I never hesitate to utilize my crock pot. I LOVE that thing!

 

5. Who handles chores like mowing the lawn, taking out garbage and recycling, taking cars in for service, emptying in the dishwasher, laundry, etc.?

Mowing the lawn and taking out garbage are DH's only real 'house chores'. The girls share the recycling, laundry, and dishwasher. I will occasionally do laundry and dishwasher too.

 

6. What kind of curriculum do you use? (Do you buy a package or plan your own?) Mostly Sonlight. This is our first year.

 

7. What are your kids' passions, interests, hobbies? And how do you support those? (Not financially, but in terms of time, etc.) This is hard for us. DD9 is in Allstar Cheerleading and I feel like she is in the gym CONSTANTLY. We are there so often that DD7 often naps over there. I'm there usually 3-4 days a week for 1-3 hours each time. Depending on how long DD9 will be in the gym, sometimes I will just drop her off. Competition seasons is Nov-April and those are worse because we're gone out of town (and out of state) every other weekend. DD7 takes Tae Kwon Do and she's there 2 hours per week. We make this work by scheduling both DD7's classes back to back on the same day.

 

8. What kind of volunteer work do you and your kids do? Do you teach Sunday school or co-op classes or assist with your kids' activities? Do you do volunteer work of your own? We volunteer at the homeless shelter twice a month, our family cleans the church facility once a month, and I teach Sunday School for the preschool class.

 

:willy_nilly: I think I need a nap just after typing that.

[Mommyfaithe]

I work full time from a home office....so, even though my kids are older....my life is crazy, my laundry is piled, they eat food faster than I can stock it up. There are girlfriends an boyfriends over....play dates....emergency phone calls....

It's just nuts. I am never, ever, ever bored.....sigh. I really wish I could be once in a while......

[Jenny in Florida]

http://www.cnn.com/2012/07/17/opinion/pearlman-end-game-kids/index.html

 

I'm trying to understand how posting an article titled "Parents, why are you pushing your kids?" is less judgemental than asking questions about how other moms spend their days . . .

 

Look, I didn't have a lot of activities growing up, either. And I was bored and unhappy. Nevertheless, when my kids were little, I never imagined maintaining the kind of schedule we do now. It's not something we did intentionally. We have no "end game." We do what we do because it makes our kids happy. Period. That's it.

 

I'm not trying to keep up with the Joneses. I'm not worried about accumulating lines on either child's academic resume. I'm not trying to steal their childhoods. In fact, one of the many reasons we decided to homeschool was to protect childhood, to allow them to be kids for as long as they wanted.

 

Because we homeschool, my kids have had the freedom to spend countless hours playing in the yard, attending park days with friends and coming home filthy and tired, reading books, playing with the pets, being so bored they have to come up with creative ways to entertain themselves. I think all of that is precious and healthy.

 

But they still have energy and the drive to do more.

 

We don't pressure our kids to be successful. We're proud of the accomplishments they earn, supportive of their efforts. But we're very clear about the fact that any accomplisments are theirs, not ours. I'm not trying to "accomplish" anything other that be the mom my kids need me to be.

[EmeraldGirl]

My days are still very full, but without littles that need constant supervision, I am able to take a break and do my own thing when I want to. Everyone pitches in here and we are like a well-oiled machine that runs when it needs to and stops and plays too.