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My dad has esophageal cancer


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He is 79, has never smoked, but he has had GERD for a long time. It turned into Barrett's esophagus, and they found a tumor last month, partially in his stomach and partially in his esophagus. It's small and encapsulated, and nothing has spread beyond (as far as they can tell from the PET scan), but the doctors want to take out his entire esophagus, which is radical surgery. My parents are getting a second opinion closer to home next week, so we'll see. In any case, he does have to do at least six weeks of chemotherapy and radiation (daily), then some sort of surgery (esophagectomy or less radical removal of only the mass), and then six more weeks of chemo/radiation.

 

The girls and I got up early this morning to bake them a spice cake for their 49th Anniversary, we did a few hours of school, and then went for a visit to Pop Pop and Grammy's house (5 minutes away). My dad offered to make me an omelet, and I nearly cried. He used to make me omelets when I lived at home, but I haven't had one of his (perfect) omelets in years. I had just eaten, LOL, but felt certain that he was offering because he wanted to get it in... KWIM? So I said yes. It was a perfect omelet. :crying:

 

They are both going through things now as though "it might be the last" of whatever it is... Christmas, New Year's Day, the twins' 5th birthday, their anniversary... They don't come out and say it, but it's there.

 

I nearly died when they opened their anniversary card and my mom made such a fuss over it. The card had a photo of lilies-of-the-valley (tiny, white flowers) on the front, and these are my mother's favorite flowers. She read the card, then had my dad put on his glasses and look at it, then they read it again together, then they held each other and read it again.... It was that look they gave each other, I know they were thinking, "Will we reach our 50th? What will this year be for us?"

 

And I am just so sad!

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He is 79, has never smoked, but he has had GERD for a long time. It turned into Barrett's esophagus, and they found a tumor last month, partially in his stomach and partially in his esophagus. It's small and encapsulated, and nothing has spread beyond (as far as they can tell from the PET scan), but the doctors want to take out his entire esophagus, which is radical surgery. My parents are getting a second opinion closer to home next week, so we'll see. In any case, he does have to do at least six weeks of chemotherapy and radiation (daily), then some sort of surgery (esophagectomy or less radical removal of only the mass), and then six more weeks of chemo/radiation.

 

The girls and I got up early this morning to bake them a spice cake for their 49th Anniversary, we did a few hours of school, and then went for a visit to Pop Pop and Grammy's house (5 minutes away). My dad offered to make me an omelet, and I nearly cried. He used to make me omelets when I lived at home, but I haven't had one of his (perfect) omelets in years. I had just eaten, LOL, but felt certain that he was offering because he wanted to get it in... KWIM? So I said yes. It was a perfect omelet. :crying:

 

They are both going through things now as though "it might be the last" of whatever it is... Christmas, New Year's Day, the twins' 5th birthday, their anniversary... They don't come out and say it, but it's there.

 

I nearly died when they opened their anniversary card and my mom made such a fuss over it. The card had a photo of lilies-of-the-valley (tiny, white flowers) on the front, and these are my mother's favorite flowers. She read the card, then had my dad put on his glasses and look at it, then they read it again together, then they held each other and read it again.... It was that look they gave each other, I know they were thinking, "Will we reach our 50th? What will this year be for us?"

 

And I am just so sad!

 

Sahamamama:

 

Sorry to read this. I see from another recent post that you guys are Christians; and it's at times like this that your prayer resources and strength from the copies of the Bible that you guys will have, can be so helpful. Anyway, these days cancer treatments are often successful.

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He is 79, has never smoked, but he has had GERD for a long time. It turned into Barrett's esophagus, and they found a tumor last month, partially in his stomach and partially in his esophagus. It's small and encapsulated, and nothing has spread beyond (as far as they can tell from the PET scan), but the doctors want to take out his entire esophagus, which is radical surgery. My parents are getting a second opinion closer to home next week, so we'll see. In any case, he does have to do at least six weeks of chemotherapy and radiation (daily), then some sort of surgery (esophagectomy or less radical removal of only the mass), and then six more weeks of chemo/radiation.

 

The girls and I got up early this morning to bake them a spice cake for their 49th Anniversary, we did a few hours of school, and then went for a visit to Pop Pop and Grammy's house (5 minutes away). My dad offered to make me an omelet, and I nearly cried. He used to make me omelets when I lived at home, but I haven't had one of his (perfect) omelets in years. I had just eaten, LOL, but felt certain that he was offering because he wanted to get it in... KWIM? So I said yes. It was a perfect omelet. :crying:

 

They are both going through things now as though "it might be the last" of whatever it is... Christmas, New Year's Day, the twins' 5th birthday, their anniversary... They don't come out and say it, but it's there.

 

I nearly died when they opened their anniversary card and my mom made such a fuss over it. The card had a photo of lilies-of-the-valley (tiny, white flowers) on the front, and these are my mother's favorite flowers. She read the card, then had my dad put on his glasses and look at it, then they read it again together, then they held each other and read it again.... It was that look they gave each other, I know they were thinking, "Will we reach our 50th? What will this year be for us?"

 

And I am just so sad!

 

:grouphug: Your post has put a big lump in my throat... I'm sorry for this sad news. :grouphug:

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He is 79, has never smoked, but he has had GERD for a long time. It turned into Barrett's esophagus, and they found a tumor last month, partially in his stomach and partially in his esophagus. It's small and encapsulated, and nothing has spread beyond (as far as they can tell from the PET scan), but the doctors want to take out his entire esophagus, which is radical surgery. My parents are getting a second opinion closer to home next week, so we'll see. In any case, he does have to do at least six weeks of chemotherapy and radiation (daily), then some sort of surgery (esophagectomy or less radical removal of only the mass), and then six more weeks of chemo/radiation.

 

The girls and I got up early this morning to bake them a spice cake for their 49th Anniversary, we did a few hours of school, and then went for a visit to Pop Pop and Grammy's house (5 minutes away). My dad offered to make me an omelet, and I nearly cried. He used to make me omelets when I lived at home, but I haven't had one of his (perfect) omelets in years. I had just eaten, LOL, but felt certain that he was offering because he wanted to get it in... KWIM? So I said yes. It was a perfect omelet. :crying:

 

They are both going through things now as though "it might be the last" of whatever it is... Christmas, New Year's Day, the twins' 5th birthday, their anniversary... They don't come out and say it, but it's there.

 

I nearly died when they opened their anniversary card and my mom made such a fuss over it. The card had a photo of lilies-of-the-valley (tiny, white flowers) on the front, and these are my mother's favorite flowers. She read the card, then had my dad put on his glasses and look at it, then they read it again together, then they held each other and read it again.... It was that look they gave each other, I know they were thinking, "Will we reach our 50th? What will this year be for us?"

 

And I am just so sad!

 

:grouphug: :grouphug:

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He is 79, has never smoked, but he has had GERD for a long time. It turned into Barrett's esophagus, and they found a tumor last month, partially in his stomach and partially in his esophagus. It's small and encapsulated, and nothing has spread beyond (as far as they can tell from the PET scan), but the doctors want to take out his entire esophagus, which is radical surgery. My parents are getting a second opinion closer to home next week, so we'll see. In any case, he does have to do at least six weeks of chemotherapy and radiation (daily), then some sort of surgery (esophagectomy or less radical removal of only the mass), and then six more weeks of chemo/radiation.

 

The girls and I got up early this morning to bake them a spice cake for their 49th Anniversary, we did a few hours of school, and then went for a visit to Pop Pop and Grammy's house (5 minutes away). My dad offered to make me an omelet, and I nearly cried. He used to make me omelets when I lived at home, but I haven't had one of his (perfect) omelets in years. I had just eaten, LOL, but felt certain that he was offering because he wanted to get it in... KWIM? So I said yes. It was a perfect omelet. :crying:

 

They are both going through things now as though "it might be the last" of whatever it is... Christmas, New Year's Day, the twins' 5th birthday, their anniversary... They don't come out and say it, but it's there.

 

I nearly died when they opened their anniversary card and my mom made such a fuss over it. The card had a photo of lilies-of-the-valley (tiny, white flowers) on the front, and these are my mother's favorite flowers. She read the card, then had my dad put on his glasses and look at it, then they read it again together, then they held each other and read it again.... It was that look they gave each other, I know they were thinking, "Will we reach our 50th? What will this year be for us?"

 

And I am just so sad!

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

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Thank you all for the empathy. Even though it's virtual, believe it or not, it helps.

 

I held all that grief in at their house today, because they seem to be at the point of just finding out what the road ahead will be for them. My husband and I have offered to do anything that we can to help them. We are trying to convince them that we are strong and resilient and can handle it, LOL, and here I am, falling apart. We do know that esophageal cancer is difficult to beat.

 

My parents were so intentional in how they read that card. At their house, I thought they were making a memory for themselves, but when I got home it dawned on me... they were deliberate about it to make a memory for me. They want me to remember this day, for the part of my life when they are gone.

 

Anyway, thanks for the encouragement, it is helpful and much needed.

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Hang in there. My dad just had this same thing happen last year. His tumor was blocking his esophagus almost 85% of the way, he could barely keep anything down. He had the esophagus removal surgery in Sept and is doing great. He's already back to eating regular food, whatever he wants. The biggest difference is that he can't eat as much at one time as he used to. I will be a rough road when he has to do the Chemo/radiation but don't lose hope.

 

I was devastated when my dad told me what he had, but was amazed at how well he did with all the treatments and surgery. I don't live near them due to having a husband in the military, but I talked to him often on the phone. He was just here for a visit and like I said it's amazing how well he's doing.

 

Just make sure to always keep positive, my dad insisted he was going to get better and kept a positive attitude the whole time and it helped a lot.

 

I will keep you in my thoughts.

 

ETA: just wanted to add that my dad is going to be 61 next month, but was in poor health before they found this. High cholesterol, obese, high blood pressure, etc. He's now more healthy than he's been in years. After the chemo/radiation they told him he didn't have to have the whole esophagus removed but that if he didn't he ran the risk of the cancer recurring, that is why he opted for the total removal.

Edited by nukeswife
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I'm so sorry. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

My father's esophageal cancer was not discovered until it had spread quite a ways in his body, but prior to that discovery the doctors were very upbeat about his possibility of recovery. I'll be praying for the best for your father.

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So sorry...:grouphug: My dad is 80, and whenever I visit he cooks me fried eggs, bacon, and white bread toast (breakfast of my childhood!) He knows I love it and always makes a special point to cook it for me.

 

I always wonder if this will be the last time he cooks me breakfast. :crying: Just make sure to enjoy it each time...

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