Nakia Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It must be awful to have your dear baby die then have to turn around and give a media interview. Those poor people. Yes! I cannot imagine. It was hard enough for me to tell my friends and family. It is just heartbreaking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Tara~ Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 That's pretty much up to them to decide, not us. It really was a crummy feeling when someone judged me for being pregnant because they didn't feel I was up to it. It doesn't matter if it is baby #3 or baby #20. And I'm not sure how that is sad for the baby but not for the family. Thank you, that's just what I was thinking. I knew there would be backlash of that sort "she's too old, her body can't take it...see?" So sad. Those comments. And very sad for their loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeeBeaks Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It's a lot harder to carry to term as a woman ages. Sometimes it's not so much about getting pregnant as it is staying pregnant when you're in you mid to late 40s. She must have waited to announce the pregnancy --so it must be a rough mid term loss. That's very sad. I have heard this too. Not due to how many pregnancies but just age. Several older ladies mention more miscarriages near the end of their childbearing years (40s). I wish her the very best (and more pregnancies if that is their wish and God's will), and prayers for their family at this time. I too have had miscarriages (one at 9 weeks and one at 11 weeks). Heartbreaking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldberry Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 So sad under any circumstances. And even more so if you had to worry about people blaming you for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elizabeth Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I do not hear anyone blaming her for the loss of her pregnancy. Stating that it was ill advised medically is not "blaming" but stating a fact. That is different from blaming . When you choose to disregard medical advice and go ahead because of a belief that you have for which there is no scientifically based reason there might be adverse consequences to either party. She was asked about the risk to her as a mother with recurrent preeclampsia and was taciturn in her reply. She is well aware of the risks yet chooses to do exactly that which could kill her or the unborn child. It is her right to do so and I defend that right. It is also my right to see her actions as ill advised and based on what I see as irrational beliefs. That does not mean I do not feel for her and her lovely family, I do. One of my dearest friends had to deliver a baby at 7 months as she was dying, the baby had only a brain stem and difficult choices had to be made. I would like to see compassion and respect for the choices women make when faced with that scenario as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I do not hear anyone blaming her for the loss of her pregnancy. Stating that it was ill advised medically is not "blaming" but stating a fact. That is different from blaming . When you choose to disregard medical advice and go ahead because of a belief that you have for which there is no scientifically based reason there might be adverse consequences to either party. :iagree: I've always liked the Duggars. I watch their show. But I was worried when I saw she was pregnant again. I felt so bad that Josie had to suffer through so much. I know she was advised not to get pregnant again due to her pre-eclampsia which, if I remember right, nearly took her life the first time she had it, and that's why she had to deliver sooner with Josie. That poor baby suffered.. They were fully aware of the risks. I'm sad that they feel sad, I'm sorry for their loss, but I feel more sad for the baby. I'm entitled to my thoughts and opinion. I lost a baby. It was so heart wrenching. Who ever said you never get over that loss is right. I remember being warned to allow myself time to heal to make the environment more healthy for the baby, making my possibility of carrying to term greater. I took that advice. Had I not taken it and miscarried again, I would have to take some responsibility for that knowing that I was advised not to do that. You don't have to agree with me. But I feel more sorry for that baby and I hope it didn't suffer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It's a lot harder to carry to term as a woman ages. Sometimes it's not so much about getting pregnant as it is staying pregnant when you're in you mid to late 40s. She must have waited to announce the pregnancy --so it must be a rough mid term loss. That's very sad. She announced the pregnancy this season on 19 Kids and Counting. Jim Bob was taking a family photo at the staircase and then after a 1-2-3 count he and Michele announced they were having another baby. To which the kids looked suprised and happy. I am very sorry to hear what happened. I was wondering about the older one gets the eggs that are left, how viable are they or how fragile they get over time for fertility purposes? Makes me sad even more for her as I know she wants another baby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I am so sad for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink Fairy Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Have the Duggars shared Michelle's reproductive health in detail? I had no idea it was public knowledge that her doctors recommended she shouldn't have any more children. Or is that just assumed? :bigear: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXMary2 Posted December 9, 2011 Author Share Posted December 9, 2011 Have the Duggars shared Michelle's reproductive health in detail? I had no idea it was public knowledge that her doctors recommended she shouldn't have any more children. Or is that just assumed? :bigear: I think it is just assumed. There have been plenty of doctors (not her doctors!) that have said she shouldn't, but I didn't see anything from her doctor saying she shouldn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I think it is just assumed. There have been plenty of doctors (not her doctors!) that have said she shouldn't, but I didn't see anything from her doctor saying she shouldn't. wasn't it said, in one of their earlier episodes, that she's likely to get preeclampsia again, and that, coupled with age, put her at an extreme high risk of getting it again? I'm almost certain that was said in one of the episodes. It is known that women who get preeclampsia are at a higher risk of getting it again, AND older women are at a higher risk........ I know Michelle has spoken to this but I don't remember exactly what she said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Tragic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Have the Duggars shared Michelle's reproductive health in detail? I had no idea it was public knowledge that her doctors recommended she shouldn't have any more children. Or is that just assumed? :bigear: I beleive they interviewed on Today show and People magazine both saying the doctor said no more pregnancies, but they decided to give it another try. She acknowledged she was under the care of a high risk doctor and a C-section was expected. http://moms.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/11/07/8684372-20-kids-and-counting-michelle-duggar-announces-shes-pregnant-again http://news-briefs.ew.com/2011/11/08/jim-bob-michelle-duggar-pregnant-baby-announcement/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 (edited) wasn't it said, in one of their earlier episodes, that she's likely to get preeclampsia again, and that, coupled with age, put her at an extreme high risk of getting it again? I'm almost certain that was said in one of the episodes. It is known that women who get preeclampsia are at a higher risk of getting it again, AND older women are at a higher risk........ I know Michelle has spoken to this but I don't remember exactly what she said. That was mentioned in one of the episodes and the reason why she was under the care of a high risk doctor recently. Her doctor seems to be very supportive of their decisions and prays with them too. Edited December 9, 2011 by tex-mex Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXMary2 Posted December 9, 2011 Author Share Posted December 9, 2011 I beleive they interviewed on Today show and People magazine both saying the doctor said no more pregnancies, but they decided to give it another try. She acknowledged she was under the care of a high risk doctor and a C-section was expected. http://moms.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/11/07/8684372-20-kids-and-counting-michelle-duggar-announces-shes-pregnant-again http://news-briefs.ew.com/2011/11/08/jim-bob-michelle-duggar-pregnant-baby-announcement/ OK- then I stand corrected. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I was wondering about the older one gets the eggs that are left, how viable are they or how fragile they get over time for fertility purposes? Makes me sad even more for her as I know she wants another baby. Yes, losing a pregnancy in the 40s is much more common. The eggs are more likely to have defects for one thing. It is very sad. I've always thought it was amazing that she had not miscarried more along the way, just in terms of odds. Most women I know with 4 or more children have had at least one miscarriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
butterflymommy Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I had a second trimester loss at age 37 (conceived when I was 36). I asked the dr if I was just too old and if i should stop trying-- she said to stop trying after age 40 if I wanted to avoid miscarriages. So I guess the odds shoot way up after 40 that you'll miscarry. The DS risk is very high at her age, I think close to 50% (?) -- maybe the baby had DS, just wild speculation here-- and didn't/ couldn't make it. I'll admit, I was worried seeing her do that long trip while pregnant. I wish she had stayed home taking it easy. I know it may not have made a difference, but what harm does it do to take it super easy for 9 months? I'm not saying this to blame, just that I felt sad and worried seeing her expending so much energy during the europe/ israel tour. She didn't look well to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I beleive they interviewed on Today show and People magazine both saying the doctor said no more pregnancies, but they decided to give it another try. She acknowledged she was under the care of a high risk doctor and a C-section was expected. http://moms.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/11/07/8684372-20-kids-and-counting-michelle-duggar-announces-shes-pregnant-again http://news-briefs.ew.com/2011/11/08/jim-bob-michelle-duggar-pregnant-baby-announcement/ Actually, those links say that the doctor gave them the green light. The special diet mentioned is probably the brewer diet or something like it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 (edited) It is very sad. I've always thought it was amazing that she had not miscarried more along the way, just in terms of odds. Most women I know with 4 or more children have had at least one miscarriage. ITA. So sad. My mother miscarried at age 42. I had two in a row prior to my children's births. One was at week 14. It's a very hard experience, but I believe Michelle's faith will be a solace to her. Since she lives her life in anticipation of eternity, this baby was born straight into the arms of God in her (also my) view. Edited December 9, 2011 by SnowWhite Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Actually, those links say that the doctor gave them the green light. The special diet mentioned is probably the brewer diet or something like it. Yes, the local doctor who prays for them. I was referring to the NICU doctor who was Josie's doctor was the one who expressed caution. But I could not find the People Magazine link for that one. And I remember seeing it expressed on last season's episode too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Have the Duggars shared Michelle's reproductive health in detail? I had no idea it was public knowledge that her doctors recommended she shouldn't have any more children. Or is that just assumed? :bigear: I think was either in one of their books or on their show that they would "fire"or just change doctors when they were told no more. I kinda remember like around child 15ish that one of the doctors refused to handle her pregnancy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Yes, losing a pregnancy in the 40s is much more common. The eggs are more likely to have defects for one thing. It is very sad. I've always thought it was amazing that she had not miscarried more along the way, just in terms of odds. Most women I know with 4 or more children have had at least one miscarriage. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I lost a baby. It was so heart wrenching. Who ever said you never get over that loss is right. I agree. My baby was the one between my two oldest. It was also a 2nd trimester loss. A little girl. Her name is Kirsten. It was really weird as I could "see" her grow with my children until she was about 7 years old. When I picture her now, she's still 7 years old. I read some reasoning about that a few years ago. (Note: I experience a lot of things quite differently than other people. I can see, hear, taste, feel, smell things from a picture or vivid description. I kinda figure that is why she was so "real" to me.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 :crying: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sewingmama Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It must be awful to have your dear baby die then have to turn around and give a media interview. :iagree: This poor woman will be raked over the coals by the public blaming her for the babies death. M/C happen to healthy people all the time - nobody knows why. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astrid Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It must be awful to have your dear baby die then have to turn around and give a media interview. Those poor people. Yes, how utterly devastating. And you know, I bet there was a TLC camera crew there. The ultrasound revealing the sex of each baby has been a filmed episode for her past several pregnancies. So heart wrenching. astrid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myeightkiddies Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Yes, how utterly devastating. And you know, I bet there was a TLC camera crew there. The ultrasound revealing the sex of each baby has been a filmed episode for her past several pregnancies. So heart wrenching. astrid I was thinking the same thing. This is probably the reason for the public statement/interview. Since TLC was most likely there they knew the public would know soon, so they gave a statement instead of waiting to be hounded by the press. Hopefully, it will work, and camera crews won't be camped outside of their home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MariannNOVA Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 My heart goes out to them -- it's a huge loss and brings with it great sadness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 :crying: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pfamilygal Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 I feel badly for them. Miscarriages suck. Especially after you're past the "dangerous" trimester and have told everyone. They've had a pretty good run though. 17 pregnancies and 19 live births is enviable. I've had 11 pregnancies and 6 live births - at least I'm batting over .500 now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Laurie Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Praying for them. My own miscarriage 16 years ago was just at this time of year...crying through the holidays...so hard. :( Yes. I had a second trimester miscarriage right around now, the beginning of December, and I always feel a little sad this time of year. That was my second pregnancy and I was only 23, so I'm not sure age has anything to do with it. I feel terrible for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Yes, how utterly devastating. And you know, I bet there was a TLC camera crew there. The ultrasound revealing the sex of each baby has been a filmed episode for her past several pregnancies. So heart wrenching. astrid Ah, the ever present camera crew. I wonder if the funeral will be allowed to be private or aired as a special. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Whether or not we agree that Michelle should keep having more babies, I would think that most of us feel very badly for the Duggar family right now. Losing a baby is a tragedy, and Michelle was already quite far along, so she probably thought everything would be ok. Also, considering her amazing track record, the miscarriage was probably a tremendous shock to the entire family. I feel very sad for them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Whether or not we agree that Michelle should keep having more babies, I would think that most of us feel very badly for the Duggar family right now. Losing a baby is a tragedy, and Michelle was already quite far along, so she probably thought everything would be ok. Also, considering her amazing track record, the miscarriage was probably a tremendous shock to the entire family. I feel very sad for them. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 One good thing that comes from tragedy as well as threads like this is knowing you're not alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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