Bashed on FB for schooling my own kids!

[angela in ohio]

I'm probably going to regret posting this, but you did ask...

 

It's POSSIBLE (and I really don't know) that she felt hurt if you worded your response in the conversation the way it's typed here: the "I LIKE being with my children" part. As a working mom myself, I am sometimes sensitive when I feel as though stay-at-home parents are implying that my working means I must not love my kids as much as they love theirs. I am sure that is not at all what you meant, but I've talked with some people (both here and IRL) who really do feel that way. If you put the emphasis on "LIKE" in that particular way and she was feeling a little sensitive already, she may have misunderstood you and thought you were implying that parents who LIKE their kids ought to stay home with them and/or home school them. That misunderstanding may have bugged her until it spilled over into her rude post on Facebook.

 

I could be totally wrong about this, it's just a guess from someone who obviously knows nothing about your situation.

 

I agree. When I read the OP, the first thing I thought is that I never lead with putting down the schools and claiming to like my dc more. Those are the reasons I think in my head, but don't say to anyone but other homeschoolers. ;) I still think she handled it badly, though, and would have un-friended her immediately.

 

:iagree:especially with the bolded part. FB gets very few visits from me because of this. I do have some "friends" who use it positively and those I enjoy when I do visit.

 

"Because nice matters" :001_smile:

 

I agree. I unfriended everyone but my family members and a few select actual friends, because I got tired of seeing grown women act like mean high school girls, trying to one-up each other and make each other feel bad.

[brendag]

I'm about the least confrontational person around, but I would definitely have had to send a private message to that "friend". That kind of passive-aggressive BS is just pathetic. I would want to confront the issue head on, especially because it sounds like this is someone you see in person occasionally. Also, if I didn't deal with it on some level, I'd boil over.

 

:iagree:

[arghmatey]

People can be so silly.

 

She sounds like an antagonistic drama lover since she KNOWS you would see her negative comments about a lifestyle choice to which she knows you subscribe. I would unsubscribe to her feed or unfriend her.

 

If she mentions anything such as, "Did you see such and such on my FB?" you can politely and honestly respond, "I did not."

[mrs.m]

Thanks to all of you, even posters after this. I'm so glad we have such an awesome network of people to lean on and learn from. I'm feeling better already!!! I WILL have to decide what to do with this person from a FB standpoint, and I DO know I will see her again and there will be questions and conflict, but I think that cat is already out of the bag so who cares??

 

 

Block (or unsubscribe) or unfriend her. It is not worth your time to be in the middle of this drama!

 

Don't regret posting this. It's good stuff to chew on. When she asked me why I would want to homeschool, part of the conversation turned to the fact that she can't wait to get her kids out of the house so she can have her relax time, and that I'm nuts for not wanting to do the same. That, along with the looks and then drilling me about what curriculum I use (remember, she used to teach), just put me over the edge and I probably did put more gusto into the word "like" than I normally would have. I am NOT a confrontational person and to be honest, I'm surprised that I stood up for my choices the way I did. She's known me almost seven years and maybe the forcefulness of my reply really took her off guard and did put her on the defensive. I'll have to really think about this because if I'm wrong about something, I do like to apologize. But I'm still not happy with the person that said moms who homeschool need to have their heads examined. :glare:

 

I started saying "homeschooling works well for our family." I don't give out more details because they either feel insecure and that I'm judging them for their choices OR it gives them more ammo for a debate. I'm not sending my children back to school anymore that they are willing to homeschool. There are some people who are genuinely curious about our life and I will discuss it with them. That's fair. But if it starts out in snark, I don't even go there!!!

 

BUT I don't think that you need to apologize either. You didn't directly insult her and she needs to grow up.

[iamrachelle]

You can't fix stupid. Unfriend.

 

:lol:

 

:iagree:

 

That is all. :D

[dragons in the flower bed]

Yeah that. I love a good FB scrap:D

 

Me too. There's a sturdy FB community of WTM'ers -- friend some of us and we'll overload your page (if we can't see hers) with pro-homeschooling stuff!

[Happy]

The easiest thing to do is hide her. You don't have to see her posts, but you are still 'friends' on FB.

 

On the other hand, I'm an ornery, passive-agressive soul myself. I'd probably start a pro homeschooling campaign on my FB status updates. Great quotes about homeschooling, quotes from homeschoolers, your thoughts on not being cookie cutter, pro-life long learner updates...

 

It could be fun...:D And would still solve your problems because she would unfriend you pretty fast.

 

The big thing to remember is...don't let her get to you. She has some issue with this that you don't know about. It's her problem.

[3RingCircus]

I agree. When I read the OP, the first thing I thought is that I never lead with putting down the schools and claiming to like my dc more. Those are the reasons I think in my head, but don't say to anyone but other homeschoolers. ;) I still think she handled it badly, though, and would have un-friended her immediately.

 

 

 

I know. I just pushed back a little more than normal when she started to slam my choices. As I said, normally I wouldn't have said anything but I really felt attacked for no reason. We were actually talking about going to our local health club and doing yoga at 10am on MWF, and that was when I said that only Mondays would work for me since my kids were in school that day. She asked me why they're not in school all the other days (she KNOWS I homeschool) so when I told her why, she gets this ugly look on her face and starts asking all of these questions. Why would you even want to do that? I can't WAIT to get my kids out of the house. Are you using public school curriculum? I've never even heard of Shurley Grammar!!! Why aren't you using Saxon???? The questions just wouldn't stop!!! And then at the end of the conversation she says, in front of everyone, "I don't know why you do it. People that homeschool just don't think logically." That was when I told her my reasons. It was almost as if she wanted to demean me in front of all of the other women, so yeah, I guess I got a little fed up and fired back. But why, WHY do that???? She's always been a very strong personality type and I've never been that comfortable with her to begin with, but since she's a good friend of my aunt there are times when I have to be around her. I'm feeling much better today though. Thanks for all of the support! There are times in life when we experience conflict. It can't be avoided and I guess it's a good time to model how to handle the real world for your kids.

Edited October 6, 2011 by 3RingCircus

[3RingCircus]

I am SO going to find you WTM'ers on FB!!!! However, my school day starts in five so I'll need to do it later. :001_smile:

Edited October 6, 2011 by 3RingCircus

[CarolfromIL]

I agree. When I read the OP, the first thing I thought is that I never lead with putting down the schools and claiming to like my dc more. Those are the reasons I think in my head, but don't say to anyone but other homeschoolers. ;) I still think she handled it badly, though, and would have un-friended her immediately.

 

 

 

I know. I just pushed back a little more than normal when she started to slam my choices. As I said, normally I wouldn't have said anything but I really felt attacked for no reason. We were actually talking about going to our local health club and doing yoga at 10am on MWF, and that was when I said that only Mondays would work for me since my kids were in school that day. She asked me why they're not in school all the other days (she KNOWS I homeschool) so when I told her why, she gets this ugly look on her face and starts asking all of these questions. Why would you even want to do that? I can't WAIT to get my kids out of the house. Are you using public school curriculum? I've never even heard of Shurley Grammar!!! Why aren't you using Saxon???? The questions just wouldn't stop!!! And then at the end of the conversation she says, in front of everyone, "I don't know why you do it. People that homeschool just don't think logically." That was when I told her my reasons. It was almost as if she wanted to demean me in front of all of the other women, so yeah, I guess I got a little fed up and fired back. But why, WHY do that???? She's always been a very strong personality type and I've never been that comfortable with her to begin with, but since she's a good friend of my aunt there are times when I have to be around her. I'm feeling much better today though. Thanks for all of the support! There are times in life when we experience conflict. It can't be avoided and I guess it's a good time to model how to handle the real world for your kids.

_________________________

Tracy

 

DS10

DD 7

DD 6

 

 

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

[HistoryMom]

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

3RingCircus, this isn't true. You're good. :)

Edited October 6, 2011 by HistoryMom

[Harriet Vane]

 

 

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

I've been on these boards for many years and I've never maintained a blog. I also started posting without any formal intro many years ago. Furthermore, I don't think anyone on this board expects to be deferred to merely because of being a regular.

 

3ring--welcome to the discussion here. :)

[3RingCircus]

Well I'm definitely not a blogger, but I can certainly introduce myself. My name is Tracy and I live in Colorado with my husband of over thirteen years and my three children, my son, daughter #1, and daughter #2. My husband is my rock!! He's the one that brought up homeschooling and he is very passionate and supportive of the decision. Unfortunately, when I went through my tough time these past few days, he was out of town on business so my rock wasn't here to lean on and cry to. That's why I leaned on the forum! Ha Ha! I've been homeschooling all of my kids since they were in Kindergarten. I found TWTM a few years ago and instantly fell IN LOVE WITH IT!!! I don't do everything by the book, but I really like being given a guideline to follow. In addition to the kids learning here at home, they're also involved in a program at one of the local charter schools. The older two attend school one day a week where they're in a classroom setting with other homeschooled children, and they're taught LA along with spanish, art, and music. They love going to school and seeing all of their friends and their teacher, but they also love the fact that the rest of the time we're here at home. It's the perfect balance for us. My son is in 4th grade this year, my first daughter is in 2nd and my youngest daughter is in Kindergarten. She actually attends three mornings a week. She'll start attending one day per week when she gets into first grade next year. Let's see......what else? I've been lurking on this forum FOREVER so it's nice to finally get involved. It's just that you ladies have such amazing insight into things so I was always walking away with snippets on how to do things better here in my own home. Hopefully I can also give to this forum since I'm officially posting. Right now my kids are watching a documentary on the planets while I'm typing this, so I guess I'd better get into motion with our workday. That's pretty much it about me. If you have any questions, just ask. :001_smile:

[CarolfromIL]

Well I'm definitely not a blogger, but I can certainly introduce myself. My name is Tracy and I live in Colorado with my husband of over thirteen years and my three children, my son, daughter #1, and daughter #2. My husband is my rock!! He's the one that brought up homeschooling and he is very passionate and supportive of the decision. Unfortunately, when I went through my tough time these past few days, he was out of town on business so my rock wasn't here to lean on and cry to. That's why I leaned on the forum! Ha Ha! I've been homeschooling all of my kids since they were in Kindergarten. I found TWTM a few years ago and instantly fell IN LOVE WITH IT!!! I don't do everything by the book, but I really like being given a guideline to follow. In addition to the kids learning here at home, they're also involved in a program at one of the local charter schools. The older two attend school one day a week where they're in a classroom setting with other homeschooled children, and they're taught LA along with spanish, art, and music. They love going to school and seeing all of their friends and their teacher, but they also love the fact that the rest of the time we're here at home. It's the perfect balance for us. My son is in 4th grade this year, my first daughter is in 2nd and my youngest daughter is in Kindergarten. She actually attends three mornings a week. She'll start attending one day per week when she gets into first grade next year. Let's see......what else? I've been lurking on this forum FOREVER so it's nice to finally get involved. It's just that you ladies have such amazing insight into things so I was always walking away with snippets on how to do things better here in my own home. Hopefully I can also give to this forum since I'm officially posting. Right now my kids are watching a documentary on the planets while I'm typing this, so I guess I'd better get into motion with our workday. That's pretty much it about me. If you have any questions, just ask. :001_smile:

 

Thank you for the wonderful formal introduction! No questions.... lol :tongue_smilie:

[choirfarm]

 

 

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

:confused::confused::confused: UMMM.. i don't have a clue where you got this "information" I have done neither of those things and don't have a blog, nor will I ever.. Where did you come up with that????

 

Christine

[SailorMom]

Blog-schmog.:glare:

 

I don't see how anyone has time to write one, or how anyone has time to read anyone else's.

 

Nice to meet you 3Ring :001_smile:

[3RingCircus]

Nice to meet you gals too!!!:001_smile:

[angela in ohio]

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

Whaaaattt? I don't think so. :lol:

 

(One thing regulars do appreciate, though, is being quoted properly.)

[SKL]

Wait a minute - did you say she had to homeschool her kid through a difficult time? I think she is reacting to her own feelings of inadequacy and frustration. Yes, it was inappropriate to post it the way she did. She may not have realized that the comments would be so venomous.

 

Please try not to take it personally.

 

I've been known to say things like "why would anyone want to be with their kids 24/7 if they didn't have to." It's not that I look down on others who do, but the fact is that my family would not be happier if I did that - at least, not for a while until we got into a good rhythm. The statement is poorly worded, but that's a common thing to do. "Why would anyone" really means "I would rather not."

 

What I'd do is put a short and sweet comment under her post - something to the effect that as a homeschooling mom, you recognize that results may vary, but you're happy with yours. Then at least the commenters will realize that the person they are talking about is right there in the room, so to speak.

[Hedgehog]

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

 

I've obviously missed something. I don't find these expectations anywhere on here, on the initial registration process, or even on anything SWB has ever written. Where did you see it?

Edited October 6, 2011 by Hedgehog

[3RingCircus]

Yes, she did have to pull her son toward the last quarter of his 9th grade year so he could advance to 10th. I think it's awesome that she took that seriously and got involved, but I know that from her posts during that time, she hated doing it. Like I said earlier, I still don't know why she started the conversation with that kind of venom in the first place. It was just odd. I just wonder how many of her friends on FB do homeschool? She has over 300+ friends, so there has to be someone besides me that saw the backlash. I haven't looked at it for a few days. I don't dwell on it if I stay away. And I did unsubscribe to her posts instead of unfriending her. I guess no matter how much it hurt, I still feel bad about doing something back that would hurt her, you know? Well, back to history. Sometimes, teaching three kids feels like herding cats!!

[Slartibartfast]

I've never had a blog, I don't have much interest in blogging. I get tired of hearing myself talk.

[5LittleMonkeys]

 

 

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

((3RingCircus)) I know a couple have stated that this isn't true...I just want to add....THIS ISN'T TRUE. The majority of us are very supportive and welcoming of new people, introductions or not. We are however very wary of people who seem to want to stir up trouble. This is one of those pass the bean dip situations I spoke of earlier. ;) So glad to have you join us and looking forward to your future contributions to our community.:D

[3RingCircus]

I've always thought about starting a blog, but it would contain the same happenings: woke up, had coffee, hit the forums, taught school, cleaned, made dinner (maybe), watched Hoarders (the show I'm currently hooked on), tucked my kiddos in then went to bed myself. Pretty boring stuff!!! :tongue_smilie:

[3RingCircus]

Hey.....I'm a larvae now!!!! :D

[3RingCircus]

Thanks Aime!

[HSMom2One]

 

 

Hi 3 ring,

I see this was your first thread. A lot of us "newbies" (those under 1000 posts I think) are unaware of some board semi-requirements (or expectations): Most want a Formal introduction from you in the beginning, it helps to defer to most of the regulars because they want you to understand their personalities I think, and many regulars want you to maintain a blog. I have understood that these are not "rules" so much as expectations.

 

Hmmmm.....been here even longer than my username/id indicates and I've never heard of this before either. If it's been expected of me over the years, I've sure let everyone down.

 

Where in the world did you get this information anyway?

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[Georgiana Daniels]

"I have to homeschool my kids so that your kids will have someone to work for."

 

Just kidding. I wouldn't write that.

 

Most everything posted on Facebook is stupid. I have a lot of incredibly smart people in my feed on Facebook, and even among those people, nearly all that is posted is stupid. So it goes. That's Facebook. I'd ignore it.

 

 

:lol: I'm putting this in my arsenal of comebacks!

[Hen]

Welcome Tracy!

 

no, you don't need a blog- but we are all pretty nosy, uh-supportive, and we will pop over and visit if you start one.

 

the un-spoken rules don't have to do with post count or blogs, just about being sincere and not trying to stir up drama for drama's sake.:rolleyes:

 

You're good :001_smile:

[3RingCircus]

Welcome Tracy!

 

no, you don't need a blog- but we are all pretty nosy, uh-supportive, and we will pop over and visit if you start one.

 

the un-spoken rules don't have to do with post count or blogs, just about being sincere and not trying to stir up drama for drama's sake.:rolleyes:

 

You're good :001_smile:

 

Love the fact that you're nosy and supportive. As for the drama? Well, I personally try and stay away from it. The past few days with my aunt's friend was enough to last me a lifetime!!! And I LOVE these Smilies!!! :D

[Hen]

aunt's-friend-drama is actually ok, gives me something to be indignant about in my boring homeschool day. We are talking about board-drama, trying to make people here mad or saying something 90% of the people here will take offense to- just to stir drama.

 

feel free to spill your dirt here, we will try to help or at least let you vent :lurk5:

[3RingCircus]

aunt's-friend-drama is actually ok, gives me something to be indignant about in my boring homeschool day. We are talking about board-drama, trying to make people here mad or saying something 90% of the people here will take offense to- just to stir drama.

 

feel free to spill your dirt here, we will try to help or at least let you vent :lurk5:

 

Kind of trips me out that people would say something just to get the Hive buzzing, and not in a good way.

[annandatje]

Just had to share. I'm so hurt and angry. The other night a person that I know fairly well, asked me why in the world would I homeschool when I can send my kids to school, in front of a bunch of other ladies of course. I felt just a LITTLE attacked and responded with the fact that I love to teach, I think I can do a bit better than our public schools here, and I LIKE being with my children. I guess I touched a nerve because four days later, she puts a post on FB about moms that homeschool and she just doesn't understand the logic. This coming from a woman that had to pull her son from the 9th grade and homeschool him just so he would make it into tenth!!!! BTW, she used to be a teacher. Suddenly, post after post shows up in response to hers and someone said, "Anyone who homeschools should have their head examined. If you don't like your public school either change it, put them in private school, or move. Don't keep your kids from everything that school has to offer!" And yes, those are quotes so that is exactly what she said. Others were a little less cruel but most held the same message. I don't know these people, but it really cut to the core of who I am as a mother and a teacher and I haven't been able to shake the hurt. I wanted to respond with a lashing of my own but I know that would have only added fuel to the fire. I don't bash families who put their kids in school. I believe that we are NOT cookie cutter families and that what works for one family wouldn't work for another. Why can't other people see it the same way???? And heck, there may be a time when I DO put my kids into school, but that time isn't now and I think I should be supported instead of thrown to the wolves. I'm thinking of unfriending this person on FB, but she's friends with some of my other friends including my aunt, and even lives next door to her! It just puts me in a weird place. But I'm so MAD!! Thanks to anyone who puts up with this long post and understands. First time I've ever posted, BTW!! I guess this is what it took so there's a positive side to everything!

 

Can you get to a place where you can overlook those who disagree with your educational views? There will always be uninformed people eager to share their ignorance and biases with anyone who will (or won't) listen.

 

You are confident in your decisions. You could always cut the homeschool conversation short by saying something like, "Obviously we disagree on the effectiveness of homeschooling, and both of us are doing what we think is best for our children. I do not need you to endorse my choice but you do need to respect it. This is not a conversation we are going to have."

 

On a sharper note, you could say something like, "Homeschooling requires talent, dedication, and perserverance that many parents are lacking. It certainly is not for everyone."

[HSMom2One]

On a sharper note, you could say something like, "Homeschooling requires talent, dedication, and perserverance that many parents are lacking. It certainly is not for everyone."

 

I LOVE this comeback -- really LOVE it!!

Snarky, yes, but still a good one. :D :D

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[azmomx3]

Your so-called friend is a passive-aggressive twerp.

 

Unfriend.

:iagree: I'm new to homeschooling and actually pulled my kids from a private school that my husband is the president of! Yikes! I've been running through a mine field ever since. What I've learned to do is ignore the people who are lashing out at me for no apparent reason, I mean, they don't know why I pulled them, and they don't have to deal with the work or outcome...so what's it to them?!?! I just keep reminding myself that I know I'm doing what's best for my kids and that's that!! I'm refuse to subject myself to the rediculous high school style attacks people like that love to launch at us. Personally, I think that they feel a little convicted that they aren't quite as invested in their own children's future. Not that everyone who puts their kids in school isn't invested, but most of them wouldn't ever dream of pulling their kids from school because it would inconvenience them. Hey, I was looking forward to dropping two off and heading to the gym for a few hours every day this year too, but my kids needed me so here I am. You're a great Mom, keep fighting the fight for your kids futures and ignore the idiots on the side of the road!!!! :D

[azmomx3]

On a sharper note, you could say something like, "Homeschooling requires talent, dedication, and perserverance that many parents are lacking. It certainly is not for everyone."

 

Oh my gosh! I LOVE that!!! :lol:

[Hen]

AZMOMX3,

 

wow, you are ballsy! Wow, cyber hugs for what you must be going through. Intellectually we know that people don't have a standing to judge us, but it is still hard having disapproval directed at you like waves.

 

Yeah, I hear you- my plan was for my kids to go to our church's private school, and then I would go to the gym, clean, water paint/be creative, read, meet dh for lunch- looking like a fab trophy wife...and then the need to homeschool kind of hit us. Now there is no time for all that, and no money for all that!

 

keep your head up, every family needs to do what is best for their kids and the meanies are just ignorant or immature or both.

[3RingCircus]

I do not need you to endorse my choice but you do need to respect it.

 

Okay, I LOVE THIS!!!!

 

 

It IS hard when people think your choices are bad. And when it comes to choices for our kids?? Well, HELLO??? And I think I said this in a different post, but when someone looks down on my choice to homeschool, it cuts right to the core of who I am right now. I could care less if someone tells me that I'm an idiot for loving garlic because it's not something that I've devoted the rest of my life to on a personal and emotional level. I've made the decision to sacrifice alot of time and sanity to teach. And I'm wondering if maybe there's a part of me that's asking myself, "Well, AM I an idiot for doing this? AM I really ruining my kids by not sending them to school?" I have alot of friends whose kids go to school and they are happy, close knit families whose kids are doing well, so I'm really having to search myself and ask if my reaction to negative comments is because of my OWN insecurities??? Hang in there AZMOMx3!!! :grouphug:

[Pam Wilhelm]

I have unfriended my brother and his family from my FB account....for totally trying to trash me for homeschooling. The fight got mean, vile, and hateful. I will never speak to him again unless he apologizes.

 

There are some people we just don't need in our lives.... ones that are so venom filled top the list.

 

I'm sorry this happened to you....there is no call for it. Shake the dust from your feet and move on.

 

:001_smile:

[Garga]

Wait a minute? WTMers are following each other on Facebook?! How did that happen and why haven't I heard of it before now?!

 

(Maybe I need to have a blog to get WTM FB friend requests....)

[kiana]

Wait a minute? WTMers are following each other on Facebook?! How did that happen and why haven't I heard of it before now?!

 

(Maybe I need to have a blog to get WTM FB friend requests....)

 

Clearly you're a troll or you'd have WTM people on your facebook.

 

(just kidding)

[Lizzie in Ma]

 

I've been on these boards for many years and I've never maintained a blog. I also started posting without any formal intro many years ago. Furthermore, I don't think anyone on this board expects to be deferred to merely because of being a regular.

 

3ring--welcome to the discussion here. :)

 

What she said. :iagree:

(even though I now have a blog, I didn't when I started coming here 11 years ago)

[silliness7]

Just had to share. I'm so hurt and angry. The other night a person that I know fairly well, asked me why in the world would I homeschool when I can send my kids to school, in front of a bunch of other ladies of course. I felt just a LITTLE attacked and responded with the fact that I love to teach, I think I can do a bit better than our public schools here, and I LIKE being with my children. I guess I touched a nerve because four days later, she puts a post on FB about moms that homeschool and she just doesn't understand the logic. This coming from a woman that had to pull her son from the 9th grade and homeschool him just so he would make it into tenth!!!! BTW, she used to be a teacher. Suddenly, post after post shows up in response to hers and someone said, "Anyone who homeschools should have their head examined. If you don't like your public school either change it, put them in private school, or move. Don't keep your kids from everything that school has to offer!" And yes, those are quotes so that is exactly what she said. Others were a little less cruel but most held the same message. I don't know these people, but it really cut to the core of who I am as a mother and a teacher and I haven't been able to shake the hurt. I wanted to respond with a lashing of my own but I know that would have only added fuel to the fire. I don't bash families who put their kids in school. I believe that we are NOT cookie cutter families and that what works for one family wouldn't work for another. Why can't other people see it the same way???? And heck, there may be a time when I DO put my kids into school, but that time isn't now and I think I should be supported instead of thrown to the wolves. I'm thinking of unfriending this person on FB, but she's friends with some of my other friends including my aunt, and even lives next door to her! It just puts me in a weird place. But I'm so MAD!! Thanks to anyone who puts up with this long post and understands. First time I've ever posted, BTW!! I guess this is what it took so there's a positive side to everything! :tongue_smilie:

_______________________________

 

Tracy

 

DS 10

DD 7

DD 6

 

 

 

Definitely unfriend.

[SweetMissMagnolia]

:grouphug: :iagree: I just wouldn't bother with a response....

[msk]

I agree. When I read the OP, the first thing I thought is that I never lead with putting down the schools and claiming to like my dc more. Those are the reasons I think in my head, but don't say to anyone but other homeschoolers. ;)

 

Thank you for not leading with those things-- I wish more people thought that way! I often wonder if people realize how easily the "I do it because I LOVE my kids" line that seems to be tossed around so readily can come across as "Well, I obviously love my kids way more than you love yours" if it's said in the wrong way or at the wrong time. It's one thing to say this in an open fight with someone who's not a "friend" and obviously set out to provoke and attack you (like the person who Facebook-bullied OP), but in any other context it's the verbal equivalent of spitting in someone's face.

 

I can't imagine a way in which a conversation (or a relationship) could go well after that. "You obviously don't love your kids much" is the worst thing I can imagine saying to a parent, no matter how it's dressed up.

[mommaduck]

Your so-called friend is a passive-aggressive twerp.

 

Unfriend.

:iagree:

[Ginevra]

Wait a minute? WTMers are following each other on Facebook?! How did that happen and why haven't I heard of it before now?!

 

(Maybe I need to have a blog to get WTM FB friend requests....)

 

Yeah, too true! I would be fine with adding some WTMers to my FB if they be so inclined.