If your child wanted to study/be something when they are older

[pooh bear]

nm

[Impish]

No.

 

First of all, I would not uproot my entire family for the benefit of one child. Second, I would especially not do it if it meant that my spouse wouldn't be with us. I consider my husband to be more important to the well being and development of our children than any opportunity could be.

 

Now, I could see an extended (ie a month) visit being possible, but not a move.

[wapiti]

No, but especially no when it would mean separation from your spouse. Absolutely not.

 

It seems to me that the type of studying involved would be at the college level, and it would be easier for him to attend college there than for the entire family to move. Moreover, he could study archeology in the US and still travel to England for the purpose of doing archeological work. The work and the study are two separate things, as far as I know.

 

Alternatively, it would be less expensive for the family to take a big trip rather than to move. Moving is expensive.

 

Add in the fact that you would have to work, and I fail to see how the idea makes any sense at all (how much vacation time would you have to take him to historical sites, and how is that a better plan than taking a trip from the US?)

Edited September 26, 2011 by wapiti

[catz]

In a word, no I would not. I wouldn't break up our family unit and move away from my husband. You may be giving your child some great educational opportunities, but you will be depriving him of a father while he's still quite young. Long distance is very hard on a relationship. I wouldn't necessarily move JUST for educational opportunities either. And I am someone who would absolutely hate living in Florida (no offense Floridians), and would LOVE to live in Europe (my husband may take an assignment overseas at some point).

 

I might start making the moves for ALL of to be able to go in a couple years if that works for the whole family. Maybe start googling for local archeologists and opportunities to see if you can find some digs/sites for him to explore locally. Has he been on a dig? Some dig sites do take volunteers. Can you visit the UK and see family and go to some dig sites and take in some theater in the mean time? Considering doing college overseas is a great idea.

[Farrar]

If your dh could join you, I'd consider it. And I would consider a half-year or other prolonged family trip or the like for the future since you have roots there.

 

But generally no. There's archaeology happening everywhere. I can't imagine there's not worthwhile archaeology to be done in St. Augustine, for example.

[katilac]

No, for all the reasons others have stated, plus the incredible pressure it would put on the child to not change his mind.

 

Lengthy visits would certainly be an option, though, considering that you have family there.

[Starr]

He can "Go Viking" in college if he's still interested. I don't see why he would need to be there now to enter an archeology program. It's a great start to be learning latin and greek. I really don't see how being away from his dad would benefit your family. I do understand your desire to live somewhere with more opportunities. :) I would keep your family together and maximize vacation opportunities.

[Kate CA]

No.

 

First of all, I would not uproot my entire family for the benefit of one child. Second, I would especially not do it if it meant that my spouse wouldn't be with us. I consider my husband to be more important to the well being and development of our children than any opportunity could be.

 

Now, I could see an extended (ie a month) visit being possible, but not a move.

 

I 100% agree. To the OP: there is NO WAY I would even consider it. That is what the college years are for.

[Tap]

No.

 

First of all, I would not uproot my entire family for the benefit of one child. Second, I would especially not do it if it meant that my spouse wouldn't be with us. I consider my husband to be more important to the well being and development of our children than any opportunity could be.

 

Now, I could see an extended (ie a month) visit being possible, but not a move.

 

 

:iagree:

 

That being said, I did relocate my family to a larger city that had a large variety of colleges. We moved when the kids were little specifically so they would have more opprotunities to follow interests and to have the option of staying home during the college years.

Edited September 26, 2011 by Tap, tap, tap

[Sputterduck]

For archaeology at 11, no. Some dreams must be started young to compete at all. That is not one of them.

[Rosie_0801]

Not a chance! (And I'd dearly love to spend some time in the UK myself!)

 

If he wants to do archaeology, he can learn the skills by participating in local digs. He can save his pennies and study hard to create the opportunity to study abroad in college. Not even the most enthusiastic of kids is entitled to their dream job straight away. Great if it happens, but for most it is a journey. If he is so interested in Vikings, he can spend the years until college learning Old Norse.

 

Rosie

[blessedmom4god]

No.

 

First of all, I would not uproot my entire family for the benefit of one child. Second, I would especially not do it if it meant that my spouse wouldn't be with us. I consider my husband to be more important to the well being and development of our children than any opportunity could be.

 

Now, I could see an extended (ie a month) visit being possible, but not a move.

 

:iagree:

[FaithManor]

I would not be able to put academic development pre-college ahead of relationship. These are the formative years, when the ties that bind are formed. The relationship with dad is worth more than the experience.

 

But, yes, I'd definitely look at ways to vacation there in an academic vein and possibly, when the child is old enough, I would consider having him spend his summers with the relatives if they have appropriate situations and are amenable. Otherwise, I would keep the family intact.

 

Archaeology happens all over the world. Going into his undergrade studies, his knowledge needs to be wider before it become narrower. So, volunteering at a local dig, museum, etc. during high school would be very appropriate. Let him read and study all he wants on the viking culture and history, but knowing that he'll not be able to specialize until grad-school, it's not important enough to break-up the family for a long period.

 

Faith

[GinaPagnato]

As you know, there are many immigrants who come to the US for educational purposes for their children. Very often, one parent will uproot with the child/children and travel here while the other parent stays behind to work. This has been the case for many families that I grew up with.

 

However, these were immigrants who were coming *to* the US because their country was either seriously lacking in political and economic stability, or there was truly NO way their child could receive a decent education if they remained in their country of origin. That is not the case with the US. There are opportunities for your ds to explore his interest, be it camps, trips, internships, etc. which would not necessitate the break up of your family unit.

 

There are archeological digs that happen abroad every summer, though he would likely have to wait until high school to participate in many of them. There are vacations back to see your family which you could structure at a time that something really interesting is going on. Lots of options, but I wouldn't take a son away from his father right as he's at the cusp of adolescence. No way, no how.

[StephanieZ]

No way, Jose.

 

Unless I really didn't like my husband, and unless I also thought my husband wasn't good for my kid(s). In that case, I'd pack. :)

 

I *would* delightedly plan long trips. Take 4-8 week trips every year or two. Save your pennies (work some if you need to), shop for cheap tix, stay with family or in hostels, or whatever.

 

I sacrifice a lot to pursue my dc's interests - $, time, etc. Dh can never relocate during the kids' growing up years b/c we own a business. Even though there are limitations around here for my dc's interests, we make do. I drive far. I plan trips. I would NEVER separate the family. Never. Never. Never.

[Running the race]

No, absolutely not.

 

Taking an extended vacation sounds like a good idea in the future.

[mazakaal]

I wouldn't do it at 11yo. That's still so young. Let him develop his interests in archaeology there in Florida (I know there are digs there, even if they are non-Viking) and plan some trips to the UK over the summers if you can. You can then send him over on his own to live with your family and do his A-levels. If he couldn't stay with family for that, then I would consider moving over for his 2 years of A-level work if that was still the direction that he wanted to go with his life. Then I'd move back to dh.

[Lily_Grace]

No, I wouldn't move based on the whims of a child. Vacation, yes. Find ways in our area to show them related topics, yes. Move for something that may change a year later? Heck no. My son wants to be a pilot. We have nowhere here he can take flight lessons. HOWEVER, he is spending this time learning about flight through science, talking to pilots/astronauts that come through the area, researching future schooling..If he was into Viking archaeology/anthropology we still wouldn't move. We'd research what archaeologists do, spend more time at the museum, give him digging tools, research the peoples who lived in our area..he could move on to Vikings as an adult.

 

It's almost a running joke around here, but any time The Kid starts complaining about not getting to do X or go to Y the spiel comes out: It took dad and I 18 years to get out of our home states and see what was out there. It's not gonna hurt you to wait until you're an adult to see the other half of the WORLD you haven't been to yet!

[LucyStoner]

I am with the others. No. Dad is too important and college would be the time for the most growth in this anyways.

 

Since you are English, can he go to college there?

 

Also, when I was 11 I was quite convinced I would become a nun. 20 years, a happy marriage, 2 kids and a career in non-profit management have disproved that belief. I know few people whose life goals don't change when they are a tween and teen.

 

I would consider extended vacations there, even consider sending him alone for most of a summer if there is a family member that would facilitate getting him around.

[Crimson Wife]

Not unless I had a child who was offered a well-paying job in Hollywood or Broadway or something along those lines.

[Susan in TN]

:iagree: with the others.

 

If you are of a praying sort, keep this in your prayers over the next few years. If this is what God has planned for your child, then pray that He will make the appropriate arrangements clear to you. There may be many opportunities for study abroad and exchange student programs when he is in high school and college. Until then, let him explore his interests through whatever means are available.

 

Who knows - a family or "partial family" trip for a month or two may be possible in the future.

[Slojo's Homeschool]

I don't know -- 11 years old is pretty young. It is entirely possibly -- and I'd say probable -- that he will change is mind between now and his 20's. It also might put a lot of pressure on him since the family moved "for him." If the passion is that strong, he will have it when he is older and when it will be much easier from him to pursue it fully. I don't know much about archaelogy, but I would imagine that an 11-year-old might have a hard time being able to just independently pursue and obtain permits for digs and would have a hard time joining a team of university-aged and professional archaelogical teams. So even if you were to move, I would think that one consideration would be the level of access to sites that he'd have before entering university anyway.

 

I think there is much he can learn about archaelogy where you live: the methodology itself I imagine takes years to learn to do well -- and that can be learned anywhere human cultures have existed; a deep study of famous archaelogists; deep study of Norse culture and language. All of that could take him well through late adolescence. You could set up a series of projects in which he would compare his experiences in Florida to ones he might have in England, and keep a running journal on it. That he would have had any archaelogical experience at all going into college will be impressive in and of itself, and it may be a benefit to him to be able to say that he has studied archaelogy in a different context (in this case Florida which I would imagine has a rich history of First Peoples and cultures to learn from). There is something to be learned from keeping some breadth to and openness about one's interests and experiences, even while you are pursuing passions. This is especially true when you are at the beginning of adolescence.

 

You can always spend summers going to England - much more feasible for staying together as a family. When he is an adult, he will appreciate that all adults have to make decisions about pursuing passions and balancing those with keeping the human relationships strong. Staying with one's family/keeping a family intact at age 11 may be the far more valuable lesson for him (and will probably make him a better, more balanced archaelogist in the future).

 

Now if you want to move for other, broader reasons - because the move would be good for the whole family whether he continues to pursue his interest or not, then that's a whole other consideration entirely.

 

Enjoy helping him navigate his deep passions. It's great to see young people have them in a culture that discourages young people to be engaged in anything very deeply.

[lailasmum]

No, Plan a long holiday when he is older, if he is still interested. I think most places you would want to visit could be done in a long holiday. Realistically he could do most of that research wherever you are. I live in a town that was destroyed by Vikings but there is nothing to look at on the ground, I think It is quite likely that he would get more out of a well planned trip and maybe University over here if there was a course with a specialism.

[YLVD]

I'm going to go against the grain and say yes, I probably would. But, only if it wasn't too long of an extended time away from the spouse. I think that the opportunity would be so enriching to the child. It also wouldn't be indefinitely. I'd put some time limits on it.

 

I only have one child though.

[Pretty in Pink]

I am English, and all of my family is still in the UK. Would you, knowing that dh would not be able to join you for a long while, consider moving to the UK, so that ds could pursue his interests? I would still home-educate, but would have to work. As I would be close to family, they would be able to watch ds whilst I was at work.

 

No. We are all of the understanding that we do whatever we need to do within reasonable means to stay together as a family. Maybe we are coming at this from a different angle because we are a military family and have endured countless forced seperations over the years; however, we would not willingly break up our family unit for an extended period of time unless there were severe, extenuating circumstances.

 

I'm not opposed to moving so that the kid can study what he likes. I *like* to move. I can think of worse reasons to move, that's for sure. I just wouldn't split up the family to make it happen.

[Laurie4b]

No--family relationships are too important.

 

He can pursue studies abroad when he is older IF he still wants to.

 

There are Viking settlements in North America.

 

There are archaeological digs all over North America-- google what's available in FL. It doesn't have to be Vikings for him to get a taste for archaeology.

[Jenny in Florida]

Within reason, yes, I would.

 

When my daughter first started getting really into theatre, things started happening very fast. My husband and I sat down and talked about how we would cope if she were to be offered a really wonderful opportunity like a national tour or a Broadway gig. We agreed without hesitation that we would do everything we could to open that door for her, even if it meant temporarily living apart.

 

In our case, it became unnecessary, because she took a break for a couple of years. But we would have done it for her in a heartbeat.

 

Interestingly, my daughter was also very interested in archaeology for several years. When she went off to college, she wasn't sure whether she would major in anthropology or something theatre related. What we found was that there simply weren't a lot of opportunities for kids to do "real" archaeology. She was an active member of the anthropological society and went on field trips with the group occasionally, but no one would let her do anything real until she was 14 or older.

 

Honestly, I think it was the fact that she couldn't really do anything with archaeology that turned her toward theatre, where kids can step in right away and decisions are made based on talent, not age.

 

I don't know that I would make a permanent move out of the country based on the interests of an 11-year-old kid. However, I would certainly move heaven and earth to make sure said kid got access to whatever opportunities I could manage on extended vacations.

[Beth in OH]

Like Jenny, I have a high schooler in the performing arts. Right now, we have been able to accommodate her development with boarding school. We are discussing whether that school still makes sense for her senior year, and part of the picture might include my getting an apartment close to a new school if boarding wasn't available. So my answer is yes.

 

BTW, dd has more than demonstrated that her interest is here to stay. She's invested hours over a long period of years working toward her goal.

Edited September 26, 2011 by Beth in OH

[Jenny in Florida]

Like Jenny, I have a high schooler in the performing arts. Right now, we have been able to accomodate her development with boarding school. We are discussing whether that school still makes sense for her senior year, and part of the picture might include my getting an apartment close to a new school if boarding wasn't available. So my answer is yes.

 

BTW, dd has more than demonstrated that her interest is here to stay. She's invested hours over a long period of years working toward her goal.

 

Yes, we discussed moving the whole family to New York at one point. My daughter was not happy in the early entrance program she was attending and really craved a more theatre-focused school. We strongly considered trying to get my husband a transfer so that we could move closer to the school she wanted to attend. (Residential would not have been an option for her, based on her age.)

 

Ultimately, we opted not to move forward with the plan, mostly because my son was devastated at the idea of leaving the city he considers home. And, finally, my daughter decided she wanted to graduate from the school she was attending.

 

But, we totally would have done it if we could have gotten my son on board before she changed her mind.

[elegantlion]

Will you adopt me? I wanted to be an archaeologist, no one took my interest seriously and I gave up. Still kind of ticked off about that one. ;)

 

No, I would not uproot my family for an interest like that, at this point. I would find ways to learn archaeology in your area. I would explore many sites and plan a vacation to areas where the Viking exhibits can be studied.

 

I would feed the interest from where you are. If it's still there when he reaches high school I would consider some study abroad opportunities, maybe summer or semester studies.

 

If you look at open courseware studies there might some on Vikings.

 

Here's a TTC course of Vikings. http://www.thegreatcourses.com/tgc/courses/course_detail.aspx?cid=3910

 

I would add literature and more historical study.

[higginszoo]

I wouldn't split up the family. We did move to make sure that we lived in a state with a wide variety of higher education options that would suit our dc's interests (our previous state didn't have that), so that when the time comes, they can take advantage of in-state tuition. There were a variety of states that met this criterion, and it was a strong factor in dh asking for a transfer. But the family unit and our relationship as a couple is more important to us than our children's career aspirations. The kids will grow up and pursue their passions ... we will do what we can until then to support them, to a point ... and that point falls far short of splitting the family up in any way.