What makes someone a risk-taker? What makes someone afraid of taking chances?

[Heather in Neverland]

So obviously, dh and I sometimes do things others think are "crazy"...like move to Malaysia on little more than a whim. Yes, we had what-if moments, etc. but overall it was a pretty easy decision for us. I try to approach most things in life with a "Why not?" attitude. It was a good opportunity for me and my dh and our kids so even though it was on the other side of the world, we thought, "What the heck...let's give it a try!"

 

My mother, OTOH, is the polar opposite. I swear that woman is afraid of her own shadow. She does not like change of any kind. She wants the familiar...even if the familiar is a crappy situation...at least it is familiar. So an unknown situation that COULD turn out great is a no-no but a terrible situation that is well-known is better.

 

That makes NO SENSE to me. at. all.

 

I am not saying it is necessarily wrong...it just doesn't make sense in MY mind. And likewise, my mother can NOT comprehend why I would do something like this. She thinks I am nuts.

 

My brother and his wife are now in a similar situation...an opportunity to do something "big", something a little crazy but with the possibility of being an amazing life experience. He is totally on board. His wife is a no-go. She is like my mom. He is like me. Obviously, this is a problem.

 

So it just got me to thinking...why are some people willing to do things "out of the norm" and others are not? Is it DNA? If so then how are my brother and I so different from my mom and our other brother (who is like my mom)?

 

What makes some people look at change or new opportunities as "exciting" and others look at it with fear?

[Night Elf]

Personality? Sensitivity? Fear of failure? Fear of unknown? Contentment?

 

I'm in between you and your mom. I'm not afraid of everything but I am definitely highly resistant to major changes. I went out of our country one time and that was more than enough for me. If DH ever asked about moving, I would rather separate than go with him. I have no interest in even vacationing outside the U.S. I have no desire to travel at all, really, not even in the United States. We go to Wisconsin to visit inlaws once a year. I get sick to my stomach for a week before we make the drive and I'm usually car sick for a while when we start off. When we're there, all I can think about is getting back home. I'm a homebody and I'm perfectly content. I'm just not an adventurous person.

 

I remember when you moved. It freaked me out. :tongue_smilie:

[unsinkable]

brain chemistry

[Heather in Neverland]

Personality? Sensitivity? Fear of failure? Fear of unknown? Contentment?

 

I'm in between you and your mom. I'm not afraid of everything but I am definitely highly resistant to major changes. I went out of our country one time and that was more than enough for me. If DH ever asked about moving, I would rather separate than go with him. I have no interest in even vacationing outside the U.S. I have no desire to travel at all, really, not even in the United States. We go to Wisconsin to visit inlaws once a year. I get sick to my stomach for a week before we make the drive and I'm usually car sick for a while when we start off. When we're there, all I can think about is getting back home. I'm a homebody and I'm perfectly content. I'm just not an adventurous person.

 

I remember when you moved. It freaked me out. :tongue_smilie:

 

Thank you for sharing this. I really do want to understand the other side's view on this...I am trying to be more sympathetic to my mom's thoughts on this and I want to give good advice to my brother (who also cannot comprehend why his wife is so adamantly opposed to a new adventure)...

 

I laughed because as much as my move "freaked you out"...the idea of only living in one place my whole life and never going anywhere or trying something new and exciting freaks ME out! :tongue_smilie: Seriously. The idea of moving back to my home town and living there until I die gives me a panic attack!

 

If you don't mind, can you tell me what it was about living abroad that was so awful that you would never try it again? What it is about change that freaks you out? Because I really, truly want to "get it".

[dirty ethel rackham]

I have to say I am on the low-risk tolerance side of the equation. While there I things I hate about living here, it is HOME. I have roots here. Moving away would feel like I left behind a body part or a kid. I am attached to the people here and the surroundings. While there are things I want to change about my home, I don't want drastic changes because, then, it wouldn't be HOME. I like traveling and visiting, but I want to go back HOME when I am done.

 

Even job changes were very difficult for me. My first job out of college was an adventure but I lived at home until I could find a roommate to share expenses with. Other people I knew accepted jobs across the country from their home state, but I just couldn't leave my family - no matter how disfunctional we were. My aunt tried to convince me to start over out in CA, but I just couldn't pick up and go where I hardly knew anyone. I was sad when my parents sold the house I grew up in and moved into a condo. I fully agreed with their reasoning, but their condo didn't feel the same to me. When it became clear that I had hit the ceiling at the job I was in, I knew I needed a change (other people I trained getting promoted ahead of me, other people getting credit for my accomplishments,) it felt like I cut off my right arm to leave. My job was my social life - I had many friends there. The only thing that was constant when I left was that I had met my future dh.

 

I guess I am saying that some people plant their roots deeply and others don't. Due to some poorly written ethics rules in our state, my husband would have to move fairly far away in order to change jobs. The thought of leaving my community behind makes me sick to my stomach. I don't do well starting over. As I have gotten older, I have become more introverted so making new friends is difficult for me. I mourn when people move away. For many a period of years, it seemed that everyone I got close to moved away and I hated to invest in new relationships, only to have them end. When I found our homeschooling community, I felt like I had come home. They feel more like family than my own family does.

 

Does this help?

[Night Elf]

If you don't mind, can you tell me what it was about living abroad that was so awful that you would never try it again? What it is about change that freaks you out? Because I really, truly want to "get it".

 

Oh I didn't live abroad, we vacationed on a cruise that went to the Carribean (leeward islands I think). So it was pretty mild. I had no interaction with the people that lived there outside of buying a couple of tshirts on St. Maarten. :tongue_smilie:

 

I just have no desire to learn another language, customs, money, food, or to be away from what I consider to be my home.

 

I don't think I can really explain it. It's just feelings that are very strong. Since you love the adventure so much, imagine someone holding you down in one spot. You said you could have a panic attack. So that's what someone feels like on the other side of the fence, or at least I do. I'm sorry for your brother and his wife disagreeing on such a huge issue. I do understand disagreement though. DH and I disagree on another child and since we can't agree, we didn't do it. He fixed it permanently. I'll always hold a resentment and major regret about that, but there isn't anything I could do or can do about it. We had to really work on our marriage for a while though. There were trust issues that reared their ugly heads.

 

Anyway, I just like home. I like comfort, safety, and stability. I'd equally freak out if DH got a job in another state and wanted to move. Egads! But we've talked about it because of layoffs a couple of years ago and agreed that it would have to be under the most dire circumstances. I shudder when I think about it.

[Mejane]

I think it's inborn.

 

I have two brothers raised by the same parents. One is extremely cautious and responsible; the other is a nut who'll try anything from extreme sports to drugs. Seriously. That he made it to 45 is a puzzle to all of us.

[ktgrok]

I think that if you have experienced small failures and come out the other side it makes you more willing to take risks, because you trust yourself to be able to handle any problems. People who take risks are trusting that nothing bad will happen, they are just trusting that they are strong enough to handle whatever bad does happen, if it happens.

 

I think people that have never experienced failure are more afraid of it.

Does that make sense?

[ktgrok]

I have to say I am on the low-risk tolerance side of the equation. While there I things I hate about living here, it is HOME. I have roots here. Moving away would feel like I left behind a body part or a kid. I am attached to the people here and the surroundings. While there are things I want to change about my home, I don't want drastic changes because, then, it wouldn't be HOME. I like traveling and visiting, but I want to go back HOME when I am done.

 

Even job changes were very difficult for me. My first job out of college was an adventure but I lived at home until I could find a roommate to share expenses with. Other people I knew accepted jobs across the country from their home state, but I just couldn't leave my family - no matter how disfunctional we were. My aunt tried to convince me to start over out in CA, but I just couldn't pick up and go where I hardly knew anyone. I was sad when my parents sold the house I grew up in and moved into a condo. I fully agreed with their reasoning, but their condo didn't feel the same to me. When it became clear that I had hit the ceiling at the job I was in, I knew I needed a change (other people I trained getting promoted ahead of me, other people getting credit for my accomplishments,) it felt like I cut off my right arm to leave. My job was my social life - I had many friends there. The only thing that was constant when I left was that I had met my future dh.

 

I guess I am saying that some people plant their roots deeply and others don't. Due to some poorly written ethics rules in our state, my husband would have to move fairly far away in order to change jobs. The thought of leaving my community behind makes me sick to my stomach. I don't do well starting over. As I have gotten older, I have become more introverted so making new friends is difficult for me. I mourn when people move away. For many a period of years, it seemed that everyone I got close to moved away and I hated to invest in new relationships, only to have them end. When I found our homeschooling community, I felt like I had come home. They feel more like family than my own family does.

 

Does this help?

 

I think there is a difference between risk taking or not, and someone that just likes home. I like home. I like having roots. But I also take risks, just in other areas.

[Chris in VA]

I think it's partly nature, partly nurture, like so many other personality characteristics.

 

There's definitely the "I had a positive experience with risk, and my parents (or others) modeled positive attitudes toward risk, so I don't think it's that scary" kinda thingy, and vice versa. I do think some fears are learned and taught, mostly at the subconscious level.

 

But there's also the brain chemistry thingy, where there might be a higher sensorial need for the adrenaline rush that comes from risky behaviors, however they are defined for that individual. And I'm sure there's other chemistry stuff I don't know about...

 

Both factors can influence each other, too.

 

Complicated, like all things human...:D

[Parrothead]

I think it has a lot to do with personality - just how someone is made.

 

I view moving as the next great adventure. If we were able to move to another country for any length of time I'd jump at it. But that is the extent of my adventurousness. I'm not thrill seeking into bungie jumping or cliff diving. I don't even like roller coasters. But I was born with wanderlust in my veins.

[Night Elf]

I forgot to include my idea of other adventures besides leaving home. I don't like venturing around to see what is where. I do it out of necessity only. I could never go bungee jumping, skydiving, bicycling or hiking long trails. Some of the decision is fear and some is just lack of interest.

 

I don't even like when I start new jobs. I've been successful at every job I've held, with my supervisors always praising me for being such a good employee. But I still fear starting new jobs. It's a fear of the unknown I suppose. I know I won't fail at any job I choose to take but it's meeting new people and learning new routines that are scary.

[mamato3 all-boy boys]

I had a little freak out this week. I'm so SICK of staying in my state for every. single. vacation. and I blew up at dh about it this week. It was instigated because one of my dearest friends is leaving in March for a 9 month RV trip across the US with her two kids and dh. I've wanted to do this since my oldest was 2. Now, I'm not jealous of her (well, OK maybe a little:tongue_smilie:), but it just brought up a lot of feelings that I've been slowing sharing with my husband over the past few years, and I guess I just finally exploded this week.

 

I LOVE traveling around for vacations -- heck, I'd travel around the world if finances were not option. I feel blessed that my parents "made" us take 2 week long driving trips all over the US, and want to bless my kids with that.

 

DH not so much. He grew up going to the same lake house for a week in the next state over for much of his childhood. His parents divorced when he was 12 and although he did a lot of traveling (as an itinerant physical therapist) in his mid-20s, not that we've got kids and such, he's pretty content to have the same sort of week-at-the-lake-in-our-own-state vacation. And that drives. me. crazy. (Lest you think I'm bashing him, I'm not.) We even met while he was traveling and did a fair share of traveling together before getting married and having kids. And we loved it.

 

Last year, we took the usual camping trip an hour from our house, but did take our two youngest to Philadelphia/ DC while our oldes was exploring DC with is boy scout troop. It was so much fun, and dh admitted that these sorts of trips (outside our state) would be fun.

 

He and I grew up very differently. I think the stability that he wants -- the predictability -- is still part of his coping mechanism from the traumatic divorce of his parents at a really vital stage in his own maturation process.

 

Me? Well, I grew up in the same city I was born in, lived in the same house since kindergarten, went to (a great) university in my home state, and finally broke free for graduate school. I loved the newness and exploration of all that I've done. (I was an itinerant speech therapist for a year and LOVED it).

 

Heck, I even like moving because I get to find new ways to arrange my kitchen. I have to move the furniture in my house at least once a year or I. go. crazy. There's probably a brain chemistry thing -- endorphins get released when I move furniture, etc. that I get a natural high on. For dh? not so much. It takes much more than moving the couch around to get his endorphins going. :lol:

 

So the upside is that dh agreed we could take outside New England vacations and he asked me where I wanted to go this year. Not one to shy away when the world (so to speak) is being offered to me: I said the Grand Canyon and New Mexico (where ds#1 was born and hasn't been back to since we left 10 years ago). He hasn't said "no" yet. :D

[RoundAbout]

I think brain chemistry plays a huge part, but upbringing as well. I grew up poor with parents who often made very dumb decisions about money so for me that is a huge security issue. I've lived abroad and traveled overseas extensively and that doesn't bother me a bit, but a lack of steady work or a low bank account balance would really trigger my panic button.

[DawnM]

It completely depends on WHAT the risk is....move to a 3rd world country? I would do it in a heartbeat, but that may be in part because I grew up in one and it is familiar to me. Travel is 2nd nature to me.

 

I also worked in an inner city high school with gang violence daily. People thought I was NUTS. I loved it and didn't even find it a risk, but everyone else seemed to think it was.

 

However, if DH wanted to quit his job tomorrow and start his own business, THAT would scare the snot out of me....when it comes to money and risk I am NOT a risk taker!

 

I also would not choose to skydive, hang-glide, bungie jump, or partake in any other height related risks! ;)

[Carol in Cal.]

Most people take risks in some areas and not in others. I think that there are always tradeoffs to risks. For me, I would consider it very risky to be bored all the time, as that would make me miserable. So when I was young, the idea of being a secretary was literally a horror to me--the idea filled me with panic. It was very motivating to get an education that would enable me to always have an interesting job.

 

The idea that every single decision I made would effect the rest of my life was pretty horrifying, too. But that's the reality of corporate life until the mid-80's. My dad worked for the same company for 40 years. Most of the people I knew did the same. When I graduated from college, I interviewed around and picked a company that was so big that it felt like I was working for 10 different companies. I figured that being able to move around in that company would give me the best of both worlds--a good career that had security, and also enough variety to keep me interested and not (horrors) bored. I planned to move from site to site until I was about 40, thoroughly getting to know varied areas of the US. And I hoped to land an overseas assignment at some point.

 

Although this didn't work out like I planned, I did get 7 overseas business trips during my career, and I worked at two different sites in this country and visited many others. It was very satisfying, and never boring! But that was mostly before I had a child. Once I did, my priorities changed and I didn't want to travel anymore. Thankfully I had gotten that out of my system by then pretty much.

 

A lot depends on your career path. In education and government, there is a lot of economic value in staying in one field and one area and building seniority and pension benefits. In tech and management and marketing, there is a lot of economic value in jumping from one company to another. So what is risky in one career is actually the opposite in another.

[Jeannie in NJ]

when I graduated from college, I headed out to Hollywood to work in movies, which I did for about 5 years. I greatly enjoyed this but then moved on to the next phase of my life.

When I was 5 , my family moved to Venezuela and lived there for a couple of years. There was a civil revolution going on there (late 1950's) so we went to Cuba and were there when Castro was taking over. I know I was only a small child but the point is that this was all mostly my mother's choices. SHe had some adventures in her life. She once (as a young adult) packed up and moved to Los Vegas, just because she had always wanted to. She worked on the movie Ocean's 11 (the orginal one with Frank Sinatra and the rat pack). She had a great time.

 

So I guess I got some of a little bit of adventure from my mom.

[the4Rs]

I am like you Heather and my husband is like your mom.

 

It is so hard. Of course when I married him I should have seen the warning signs. I was living on my own he was still living with parents. I had lived all over the US growing up he lived within 200 miles of where he was born his whole life. I like to just pick up and go do something on any given day. He wants it all planned out well in advance and for all contingencies.

 

When we pack to go somewhere he over packs for twice the length of our stay "just in case" while I figure I'll find a laundromat for my stuff if necessary where ever we are.

 

A lot of it is how we were brought up. My husband's family always said "home and family is the most important." They never traveled and were NOT and are still not spontaneous. My family was like "where can the road take you" mentality.

 

I see good and bad in both situations actually. My side was fun and has great memories of doing all kinds of amazing things but my family was so spontaneous and go, go, go our family dynamics fell apart, parents divorced, and my family is now strung out all over the US with rarely time for each other but boy do we do some pretty neat things.

 

My husband's side has no memories of doing anything crazy or adventurous yet his parents stayed married and family is important to them.

 

I once asked hubs if he would live overseas and he said NEVER. I was bummed out by that. I'd love the experience for longer than a few months on a mission trip.

[Murphy101]

I think there is a difference between risk taking or not, and someone that just likes home. I like home. I like having roots. But I also take risks, just in other areas.

 

This.

 

For example, I would love traveling all over. But I would never just sell my home and just go. I like the knowledge of a secure home base, even if it is rented out while I am gone.

 

I do not handle financial risk very well. HATE debt. Experience has taught me it just isn't worth it. Makes me physically I'll to contemplate.

 

But I have gone cliff diving and so forth tho.

 

And most people would think having children on a low income, especially 10 of them, is for sure a big risk in several ways.

[joannqn]

I think I'm in the middle. I'm a risk taker with some things and completely not a risk taker on other things.

 

I've white water rafted and was disappointed when we couldn't go over the waterfall. We were suppose to but there was a kayaking event at the bottom of the falls that day so we had to rope around it. I've always wanted to do more extreme rafting than most public places are allowed to do. I've also been mountain climbing and rappelling, and while my behavior on the side of the rock was embarrassing, I also loved it and would do it again. I've always wanted to bungee jump and try skydiving.

 

Moving, traveling, and even short term visiting are distressing to me, though. It used to be that I'd get really depressed being away from home once nightfall came. Even one night away from my own bed was difficult. DH and I spent a week in Rosarito, Mexico (not a resort town) visiting a friend of his when we were first married. I spent a good portion of the week in the fetal position, crying, with stomach cramps, and diarrhea. No, it wasn't the food or water; it was severe distress.

 

Since then I've been able to enjoy 3-4 days away from home, if I'm with people I enjoy being with doing things I enjoy doing. I'm usually more than ready to return home after the 3rd day, though. I have survived 5-7 days away from home...in a hotel, in Portland, busy doing fun things with the kids from the moment we wake to the moment we go to bed. I've found that being busy with no downtime helps be survive it.

 

Last year, DH did apply to your school with blessing. Part of me really wants these exciting adventures. I felt I could handle Malaysia, in part, because of how you've described the relationships there. Plus, I was being realistic on just how hard I thought the transition would be for me but was willing to live through it to give the kids the experience. I expected daily tears, upset stomach, diarrhea, and panic for the first several months.

[mommytobees]

With out doubt I think it is a matter of conditioning and your internal acceptance/ diversion of the stimulus.

 

I grew up in an abusive, risk-taking (on the part of my step-dad), and "why not" attitude household. I have no genetic connection to my step-dad (and I wouldn't want to anyway, he's an abusive explitive) but I take risks and leap just as he does. To some degree it is my aversion to be like him in any way at all, but in more ways it is my internal acceptance instilled in me at a very young age. Plus, it is my UNacceptance to resemble my mom in any way who is more like your mother.

 

We call me a nomad in my family, but I think it is more than just the desire to GO. I think it is the acceptance to do the unknown.

 

Kris, who had a hard time moving to an Asian country

[justamouse]

I think that if you have experienced small failures and come out the other side it makes you more willing to take risks, because you trust yourself to be able to handle any problems. People who take risks are trusting that nothing bad will happen, they are just trusting that they are strong enough to handle whatever bad does happen, if it happens.

 

I think people that have never experienced failure are more afraid of it.

Does that make sense?

 

 

THIS. Wow, a friend and I were having the same discussion.

 

You fall. You get up, dust yourself off and go, "Hey. That didn't kill me."

 

Next time, you jump further. And the next fall doesn't kill you, either. And-whoa, look at that. I got a raise.

 

This time, I'm gonna leap. Cause I know, that at the least, it won't kill me and I trust myself that I'll work out of the problems should they arise.

 

We've fallen MANY times before we hit it right.

[Daisy]

It is never the risk that stops me. It is the to-do list.

 

I just can't stand the thought of having to do 50 million things before vacation, moving, etc.

 

Changing the licenses.

Changing the addresses.

Trying to get the house ready to be sold.

Selling the house.

Trying to homeschool while selling the house.

The checking accounts.

Finding new doctors.

 

Blah, blah, blah. I HATE doing that all that STUFF.

[Laurie4b]

I agree. Basic brain chemistry impacts this a lot. Some people think people who take risks are crazy. People who take risks often have lower amounts of certain brain chemicals than people who don't take risks (Dopamine or serotonin--I forget which!) . Taking risks helps to increase those chemicals and makes them feel good. Other people feel fine without the extra stimulation. We need both types in society for the optimum equilibrium between change and stability.

[unsinkable]

I agree. Basic brain chemistry impacts this a lot. Some people think people who take risks are crazy. People who take risks often have lower amounts of certain brain chemicals than people who don't take risks (Dopamine or serotonin--I forget which!) . Taking risks helps to increase those chemicals and makes them feel good. Other people feel fine without the extra stimulation. We need both types in society for the optimum equilibrium between change and stability.

 

What a wonderfully respectful thing to write!

[KrissiK]

Personality? Sensitivity? Fear of failure? Fear of unknown? Contentment?

 

Personally, I think it's the first four. I am a risk taker, in the sense of loving adventure and travel. When I had been out of college a couple of years and living on my own and teaching school I just up and decided to move to Sao Paulo, Brazil and teach at a missionary school. One morning, I did that. I'd dropped a little application at the ACSI (Association of Christian Schools International) Overseas Teaching Opporunities box at a teacher's convention one fall. It was just a whim and I didn't even think about it again until one morning in March I got a call from a school in Brazil (6:00am my time) wanting me to come teach there. I said, "Sure!" And I went that next fall. When I was single, I moved all over the place and did all sorts of things. Then I got married and DH is not a risk taker in any sense of the word. It's been tough because there are so many things I want to do, but DH doesn't and I don't want to nag him and I have pushed him on some minor issues during our marriage and it wasn't good at all. So, I guess I can just say I'm glad I married late and was able to indulge in that for a while!:D

 

I don't think people are risk takers in all areas of their lives, either. Even just reading these posts, people seem willing to take risks in one realm, but are quite timid in others. I mentioned that I was a risk taker in travel, etc. but I am not a risk taker in social situations. At all.

Edited January 13, 2011 by KrissiK

[justamouse]

I agree. Basic brain chemistry impacts this a lot. Some people think people who take risks are crazy. People who take risks often have lower amounts of certain brain chemicals than people who don't take risks (Dopamine or serotonin--I forget which!) . Taking risks helps to increase those chemicals and makes them feel good. Other people feel fine without the extra stimulation. We need both types in society for the optimum equilibrium between change and stability.

 

But do the brain chemicals change because of the behavior or does the behavior arise because of the chemicals? Chicken or the egg?

 

You have NEVER seen a person more risk averse than my Dh. Seriously-he is Adrian Monk. But, we also spent a year with no pay and started a company and I see people who think we were NUTS. Paid off, though. He also fell a few times before this take off, too.

[Audrey]

I think it's largely a personality issue. Some people enjoy the rush of trying something new, venturing into the unknown. Others can't handle it or are uncomfortable with it.

 

Generally, I am a very unadventurous person, but I have done some "crazy" things in life. I'm glad I did the crazy things, but I don't go looking for them. The opportunities just sort of "found" me and, like you, I said "Why not?"

[Peela]

Since we dont have much choice over our personality or our conditioning, I would say it's just that we are all different. I am a risk taker and so is dh- probably why we were attracted to each other. But we choose to be pretty stable for our kids as they seem to thrive more on our stability than our wildness. We are already dreaming what we might do when they no are no longer living with us and are independent- not so far away now.

I remember as a kid making a promise to myself not to live like I saw others living- just waiting for the next home improvement, the next small holiday, the next job promotion- I grew up literally wondering why people lived such small lives and why. I don't really know why- there probably isnt an answer- but I have lived my life differently- and for that, have very little to do with my family, although I love them.

[Heather in Neverland]

What awesome responses!!! They have really made me think about why it is that I take risks. Since I left home 15 years ago I have lived in 9 different homes and worked in 6 different jobs.

 

I don't get attached to homes or towns or jobs and while I do get attached to people it is only a select few. I also don't really "collect" anything and only keep a small amount of important "mementos".

 

I AM a very sentimental person but it plays out in terms of memories and not an attachment to things. Even my mom said "Aren't you sad to leave your house behind?' and I sincerely responded "No. It's just a house. I'll get another one."

 

As much as so many people would panic at the idea of selling their home and moving to a new place or starting a new job...I would panic if I didn't. Like MASSIVE claustrophobia would set in. I am ADDICTED to change. :D

 

I have this weird "fear"...like the minutes of my life are ticking away and I am not going to have time to do and see all the things I want to do and see. I know it sounds strange. :tongue_smilie: But it is real.

 

I could care less about bungee jumping, etc. But I am already thinking about what my next new adventure might be. I guess I am very lucky that my dh is happy to go along with my hair-brained ideas and my kids love adventure too.

 

But I found myself thinking this morning about what it would take for me to settle down and live in ONE place until I die...what would it take for me to live like that and be happy?

 

If you are NOT a risk-taker how would you answer that? What would it take for you to leave your familiarity and go to the unknown and be ok with it?

[6packofun]

One thing I notice about risk-takers is that they enjoy sharing about their risks with others, talking with pride about them. It's important to them to BE this way (and to be seen this way?) and they see it as a positive trait. The opposite is puzzling to them rather than simply being another way to be.

 

Others just don't have that need for change or (presumed) excitement or experiences that can only be topped by something more risky/exciting. So I think contentment for what one is doing and where one is at, IS part of the equation in the difference.

Edited January 14, 2011 by 6packofun
..m,

[Laurie4b]

But do the brain chemicals change because of the behavior or does the behavior arise because of the chemicals? Chicken or the egg?

 

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I can tell you that it was pretty clear with some of my kids from the get-go, but I agree, the environment and our choices can also affect brain chemistry. But I think "risk-taking" in general is a genetic trait.