What is your favorite response to...

[nicholsonhomeschool]

"you home school? I just couldn't do it!"

 

With one child in a school program and one at home, I get a lot of this and sometimes I just run out of creative responses. any help?

[Hot Lava Mama]

"Then maybe you shouldn't!

[Hedgehog]

Depends how I'm feeling, and who's asked; it will vary from "Oh, I'm sure you could" to "Oh, right!" It's a bit of a non-starter, really; what exactly are they wanting me to say? You know?!

 

I very occasionally want to say (but don't) "No.. you couldn't. Please don't consider it." :lol:

[Capt_Uhura]

I just smile and change the subject.

[nicholsonhomeschool]

"It's a bit of a non-starter, really; what exactly are they wanting me to say? You know?!

 

I very occasionally want to say (but don't) "No.. you couldn't. Please don't consider it." :lol:"

 

Exactly my feelings! My husband tried to convince me that it is a compliment, but it really doesn't feel like it. Anyways, I REALLY appreciate your responses! I'm quite exhausted with defending myself, but it sounds like we all get this...

[Caraway]

When annoyed I go with "Yeah, it's not for everyone."

[5Wizards]

I usually just don't say anything. Occasionally I might say something along the lines of, "We all have to do what works best for our families." I really don't know what I'm supposed to say after a comment like that.

[daisybeetle]

let's see how it ends. hah..

[kewb]

I usually say "You never really know what you are capable of until you are in a situation." Then I smile and change the subject.

[JoyfulMama]

When annoyed I go with "Yeah, it's not for everyone."

 

:iagree:I use that one, or "It works for us." And then, pass the bean dip. :D

[MorganClassicalPrep]

Depends on my mood, and the attitude of the person saying it. I often get people telling me they couldn't do it, meaning they really couldn't handle the responsibility of educating their children. If I'm in a good mood, I say (very graciously) "Well, it really isn't for everyone".

 

If I'm in a bad mood, or someone says it meaning they couldn't handle being around their children all the time I say something along the lines of "Probably not". lol. I try to avoid saying that... but sometimes it just slips out... :glare:

[farmwife]

I very occasionally want to say (but don't) "No.. you couldn't. Please don't consider it." :lol:

 

:lol::lol::lol:

So, so funny!

[In the Rain]

"We love it!"

 

I'm not confrontational, and I figure most people mean well. I may be thinking all of the great responses in my head, but I say something nice. :001_smile:

[5LittleMonkeys]

Sometimes I say, "Well, it takes a great deal of patience, organization, determination and you have to like being around your children everyday. Some days it is very hard but for the most part it is a blessing."

 

If they persist and continue to say how they could never do it then I follow with, "Well, then you have made the best choice for your children by putting them in ps."

[Mommy22alyns]

This is usually my response: :001_huh:

 

 

I can just never think fast enough on my feet. Actually, a very dear family friend said, "I just don't see how you have the patience" when we were there at Thanksgiving and I had no response at all. None. I sat there like a log until someone else distracted her!

[Jen+4dc]

My stock answer is, "You'd be surprised what you can do when it's what is best for your own kids." Then I smile and change the subject.:D

[redsquirrel]

If I am feeling particularly surreal I say, "Yeah, me neither" and just keep walking. I love it when I do that. I highly suggest trying it at least once.

 

Mostly I just smile and say "it's not a job, it's an adventure!"

[nukeswife]

I usually say something along the lines of "Well it's not for everyone" but one time in a situation at a store where a woman I didn't know approached us out of nowhere and started with "What school do they go to, ours isn't off today" and then even after politely saying "We homeschool" she just kept following us and going on and on with little remarks that were supposed to be jabs my oldest son just couldn't "smile and wave" anymore and said "My mom is great at it, but SOME people would NEVER be able to pull it off"

 

Yes it was rude, but no more so than the woman following us making her rude comments.

[NanceXToo]

I'd just shrug, smile, and say "We love it!"

[Mosaicmind]

I use this on anyone who gives me any questions or comments anymore:

 

http://www.secular-homeschooling.com/001/bitter_homeschooler.html

[LizzyBee]

I usually say something like, "You could do it if your kids needed you to. I never thought I'd homeschool, either!"

[nicholsonhomeschool]

I love all of your replies! And the "Bitter Homeschooler's Wish List" had me laughing out loud. Thank you for the cameraderie -- now I'm prepared for the next poor soul who asks...

[rwjx2khsmj]

My response is usually, "You could if you believed that it was best for your children." Really, how do you argue with that?!

[johnandtinagilbert]

I always say, "It's not for everyone. At least in my job, I expect everyone to act like children b/c they are. I don't have the patience to work with a bunch of adults who act like children. They'd drive me crazy.":lol:

[LazyDazy]

"you home school? I just couldn't do it!"

 

 

"Well no, not with that attitude." *big smile*

 

Yes, I'm a bit of a snot when people continually question my ability to make good decisions for my children. I would try to say this in my most encouraging voice though.

[MerryAtHope]

I like to say, "I wasn't sure I could either, but you learn as you go." The moms who have said this to me really feel like they couldn't do it--and one who has said it to me now homeschools! Don't burn bridges & realize that the person probably just feels inadequate.

 

Merry :-)

[IsabelC]

Normally when I get that comment it's just a throw away line and they're not really all that interested, so I just say "Oh, we really enjoy it", or - if I'm feeling generous - "parenting is a big job however you educate, isn't it".

[Alphabetika]

I've actually said, "That's okay. You don't have to."

 

After all, it's true, right?

[Swirl]

Usually, I just say that it's not for everyone. But I've been known to say, "Well, we must have different priorities."

[debbielong]

My favorite reply to that one is similar to those above: You would, if you thought it was in your children's best interest.

 

I have to say, though, that I receive far fewer negative or questionable comments these days, compared to when I started homeschooling seven years ago. Actually , I get far fewer questions, now that I think about it. And when people do ask, they generally finish off with - I think that's great!

 

Interesting...

[Tarreymere]

"Well no, not with that attitude." *big smile*

 

Yes, I'm a bit of a snot when people continually question my ability to make good decisions for my children. I would try to say this in my most encouraging voice though.

 

:lol:

[grace'smom]

I was in the store recently and a cashier asked me if my daughter was out of school that day. I said we homeschool and she said "Oh, I can usually recognize the homeschoolers but she doesn't act like one. They have a certain demeanor. I can almost always tell who they are..." I just said "well, she's pretty much always acted the way she does now."

 

I couldn't tell whether she was trying to say that homeschoolers are wierd or my daughter was misbehaving or what. I did not know whether she was saying something positive or negative and I was too flabbergasted to ask for clarification.

[Stacy in NJ]

:001_smile:

 

"you home school? I just couldn't do it!"

 

With one child in a school program and one at home, I get a lot of this and sometimes I just run out of creative responses. any help?

[Violet Crown]

My first response is

 

"Everyone does what's right for their own families."

 

9 times out of 10 that's the right response, because "I could never do that" usually seems to mean "I'm totally uninterested in homeschooling my children but I suspect that you think I'm shortchanging them by having them in school."

 

But sometimes it really means "I have no clue what homeschooling involves and it seems very intimidating." If there's a followup response that suggests that that's what the interlocutor means, I go with

 

"Homeschooling is like any other job; it looks hard from the outside, but when you're past the learning curve and actually doing it, it's not."

 

I've been surprised how many people feel enlightened by that second answer. Seeing it as a job with a learning curve, and not as some special parenting skill that they suspect they might not have, seems to help a lot of people be more comfortable with the idea that they could do it if they wanted to, but aren't under any pressure (from me) to choose it.

[DragonFaerie]

I usually just say "I never thought I could either but now we love it."

[Veritaserum]

My stock answer is, "You'd be surprised what you can do when it's what is best for your own kids." Then I smile and change the subject.:D

 

Ooh! I like that! Usually I say something like, "Well, it's not for everyone, but it works for us."

[Haiku]

"you home school? I just couldn't do it!"

 

 

"Well, we have a lot of fun with it." *big smile*

 

Tara

[Zoo Keeper]

I like to say, "I wasn't sure I could either, but you learn as you go." The moms who have said this to me really feel like they couldn't do it--and one who has said it to me now homeschools! Don't burn bridges & realize that the person probably just feels inadequate.

 

Merry :-)

 

 

I usually say something very similiar, "The kids are learning a lot, and so am I..." With a smile. Folks seem to think that I am either a big idiot or a saint. I don't care which opinion they choose. The children and I are fine either way.

[Carol in Cal.]

If it's someone who really wants to know, I say something like, "Well, it sounds harder than it is. I have a lot of help!" or "It's like nursing. You think you can't do it, and then you try it for a day or two and pretty soon you're in the groove wondering why you ever worried about it." Someone who is a really good friend with good will might hear, "Wow, here's what I know--if I can do it, you certainly can! But, hey, you don't have to! The homeschooling police are not on patrol!"

 

Most of the time, though, I say something like either, "Wow, it's just working out great for our family!" in a really smiley way, or, "I'll bet you're doing the very best thing for your specific family, just like we are!"

[TheAutumnOak]

"you home school? I just couldn't do it!"

 

With one child in a school program and one at home, I get a lot of this and sometimes I just run out of creative responses. any help?

 

I just smile and don't really say anything...Most people are just commenting and don't really want to hear anything more...

 

If one of my friends seriously asks me, then I will discuss it with them by asking them why they feel like they couldn't...Then we start from there based on their answers...

[Faithr]

I usually say, "If I can do it, anybody can do it!"

[Vida Winter]

I don't say anything. It's usually a statement that doesn't require a response.

[love2read]

I respond "Why not?" and go from there.

[sagira]

When annoyed I go with "Yeah, it's not for everyone."

 

This. And then I add, whatever works for your family. Homeschooling is working for us.

[dcjlkplus3]

"well, it definately has its challenges, but we'd probably dealing with a lot of the same challenges if they were at school."

 

ETA:

"well, it is a challenge, but its worth it for us"

Edited December 18, 2010 by dcjlkplus3
edited to add

[tricia]

Can't and Couldn't never could do anything!

[texasmama]

"It's not for everybody, but it works for us!":001_smile:

[Sunshine State Sue]

I often get people telling me they couldn't do it, meaning they really couldn't handle the responsibility of educating their children.

:iagree:

 

I used to say:

It's a lot of work, but I find it very rewarding.

 

Now that puberty has surfaced/emerged/exploded (can't find the right word), I say:

It's a lot of work.

 

:blink::scared:

 

:leaving:

[Dolphin]

I am still new to this, so I usually say that my kids and I are learning together, and we really like being together.

 

However....

 

Another mom told me this one, I tried it once and I think it will be coming out more and more often as the shocked look was great. Before they get to that, when they ask why my ds is not in school. I kept a straight face and said "Oh, we quit, I don't believe in school" and walked away. It was great, she was being a nosy parker in a rude way and nothing I said would have been good, so I had fun!

[Cindyz]

"It's definitely best if you have a good attitude about it and truly enjoy it."

 

Basically what I'm saying is if you WANT to do it and if it's something you think you would enjoy, then you can do it. It's probably best that those who think they couldn't do it, don't. :glare: