low-rise pants and young girls

[CalicoKat]

I don't intentionally give my dd low-rise pants. In fact, all of her jeans/pants are actually the classic cut -- snaps/buttons near the belly button region. But she manages to wear her pants all on the hips area which is problematic because when she bends overs, sits down, etc too much of her backend is revealed. I've coached her on this before, paid extra attention to the pants I buy her, and today I had to tell her that I'd gotten feedback from another homeschool mom that it was troubling and I needed to fix it.

 

I don't know how to fix it. Other than making her wear dresses continually which isn't her preference.

 

Thoughs or suggestions?

[rwjx2khsmj]

Well our standard comment to this is:

 

"Crack kills"

 

:lol::lol:

That may not have been the type of help you were looking for.

[OHGrandma]

Insist she wear a belt and keep it snug?

[OnTheBrink]

Can you show her pictures of other girls with the problem, so she gets an idea of what she looks like with her hiney showing?

[CalicoKat]

Well our standard comment to this is:

 

"Crack kills"

 

:lol::lol:

That may not have been the type of help you were looking for.

that's just too close to the truth to be funny right now. Give me a couple weeks after I get this solved then I'll laugh I'm sure. :001_huh:

[rwjx2khsmj]

that's just too close to the truth to be funny right now. Give me a couple weeks after I get this solved then I'll laugh I'm sure. :001_huh:

 

:grouphug:

We use it more as a warning/notification that pants are slipping too low. Kind of a family short hand. I can say it very quietly and my children immediately know what needs to be done.

 

I also bought long tank tops for my dd so that she can put them on under any shorter shirts as a second layer, just in case of slippage.

[AK_Mom4]

I will second the long tank tops. My older DD who is almost 16 wears jeans every day and it is difficult to find ones that come high enough, so she wears a long tank top most days under her shirts or sweatshirts. It's a great solution to the crack problem.

[Big Buckin' Longhorn]

Can she wear longer tunic style tops that cover beyond the waist and crack area?

 

That's what I have to do because I don't want anything near by behind or belly showing, but all the jeans in my size seem to be low rise :confused:, which makes no sense to me because I am NOT a small woman.

 

Anyway, I just wear longer tops so that I'm sufficiently covered to my satisfaction.

[OHGrandma]

Could also go with a bodysuit, http://www.amazon.com/100-Stretch-Nylon-Bodysuit/dp/B0000A4FJL .

[pqr]

You answered your question. Make her wear dresses, until such a time as she can properly wear jeans.

[abreakfromlife]

just get long tank tops to wear underneath. If she's being purposefully rebellious and trying to show her crack, then maybe dresses would be appropriate....but I know that as a conservative adult, I have jean problems and just wear long shirts underneath to take care of it. If she's not purposefully trying to show skin, it seems mean to make her wear dresses if she doesn't want to.

[CalicoKat]

just get long tank tops to wear underneath. If she's being purposefully rebellious and trying to show her crack, then maybe dresses would be appropriate....but I know that as a conservative adult, I have jean problems and just wear long shirts underneath to take care of it. If she's not purposefully trying to show skin, it seems mean to make her wear dresses if she doesn't want to.

no not purposefully rebellious.

 

Where do you buy these long tank tops?

[helena]

Maybe you can shift the focus from pants to tops?

You don't have to wear a dress to get a little length, here are some tops that my daughter likes, (she prefers her pants and legging to sit a little lower).

http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=6292&vid=1&pid=708585

http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?searchCID=25781&pid=683631&scid=683631022&vid=-1

sometimes the short dresses look cute with skinny jeans, my daughter has been living in this one all week:http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=7072&vid=1&pid=708598&scid=708598002

 

http://www.naartjie.com/detail.aspx?ID=2188

you can also layer a shorter/regular length top over a long tank top, or do a light cardigan over a top my 10 yo uses this one:http://www.target.com/Girls-Mossimo-Supply-Long-Sleeve-Sweater/dp/B002FVUQ60/ref=br_1_13?ie=UTF8&frombrowse=1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=15993461&node=15993461&searchRank=salesrank&searchPage=1&searchSize=30&id=Girls%20Mossimo%20Supply%20Long-Sleeve%20Sweater

 

I've given up on the pants that come up higher, once my kids were used to the lower ones, they think the high ones feel horrible. That's fine, but they have to compensate with a longer shirt. Absolutely not ok to see a girl, teen, womans bottom pouring out of her pants (in my opinion :))

[abreakfromlife]

I get mine at Target, Wet Seal, and Forever 21 - the last two have a lot of odd clothing choices, LOL, but they have cheap shirts - but Target usually has theirs for 6 or 7 bucks. They have longer long-sleeve shirts, too, so even when I wear t-shirts, I usually have them over a long-sleeve shirt.

[elegantlion]

no not purposefully rebellious.

 

Where do you buy these long tank tops?

 

Old Navy used to have some. I noticed at Kohls the other day that some jeans with a higher rise in the back. I can't remember the brand however.

[abreakfromlife]

long, lean tanks

[fivetails]

I don't intentionally give my dd low-rise pants. In fact, all of her jeans/pants are actually the classic cut -- snaps/buttons near the belly button region. But she manages to wear her pants all on the hips area which is problematic because when she bends overs, sits down, etc too much of her backend is revealed. I've coached her on this before, paid extra attention to the pants I buy her, and today I had to tell her that I'd gotten feedback from another homeschool mom that it was troubling and I needed to fix it.

 

I don't know how to fix it. Other than making her wear dresses continually which isn't her preference.

 

Thoughs or suggestions?

 

Longish tops. They're very in style here right now - they remind me of baby doll dresses, except they're shirts.. know what I mean?

 

Long tank tops underneath so they hang out & cover that area - it also looks quite cute most of the time, layered look.

 

How old is she, by the way?

 

It's prolly not intentional - ie, she's not thinking "ooo, how can I make these jeans low-rise" ....... ;)

 

I wonder if she's like me - I don't wear jeans, but all of my skirts sit down on my hip bones because I can't STAND anything up around my belly. Seriously. It's crazy uncomfortable and drives me nuts... [My tops/sweaters/etc are long, so there's no skin showing]

[bluemongoose]

My DD also has this problem (as do I) and also both of my DS. We are the flat butt family, so they tend to slide down. We also try to do the long shirt thing as even the higher rise jeans slide down for us and really are less comfy anyway.

 

My DD does wear a lot of dresses with leggings as she gets frustrated with her pants slipping....but it sounds like that probably wont work for your DDs taste.

[fivetails]

feedback from another homeschool mom that it was troubling and I needed to fix it.

 

I get the feeling that maybe this other mother wasn't as... respectful... as she could have been?

 

[looking also at your reply to rwjx2khsmj]

[Starr]

Some pants have to have a belt. Also when trying them on have her squat down and lean forward and see how they fit. I think it would help if the first long tank was tucked in but my dd looks at me funny. I tell her that we wore these clothes in the olden days so I do have experience. The" been there, wore that ",has become a joke at our house. You could also put a little elastic in the back. This will be an ongoing challenge. We're rooting for you.

[helena]

It seems like longer shirts or dresses with pant are the easier way to go, but I did find this:

 

http://littlebirdiesecrets.blogspot.com/2009/07/hip-cover-up-for-girls.html

[clarkacademy]

I notice it tends to happen less when my dd bends at the knee instead of picking stuff up bent at the waist. That is better all around because she is very picky about who is looking at her where. It is more safer to pick things up that way anyway. Other than that just go with the longer undershirts that everyone has stated. I also think it is kinda rude that someone pointed that out to you unless your daughter was doing some type of behavior that was not very good. With my smart mouth I would laughed and said oh gee thanks for letting me know that you enjoy looking at my childs behind I will be sure to watch that. Just me though and I am a smart mouth. Good luck. The clothes today make it hard for a young girl to be proper in my opinion so I know how u feel.

[Dobela]

If you know she is wearing a paor of pants that are revealing, take her in them to a store with a 3 way mirror. Then have her bend, sit, and all that so she can see exactly what is happening. I had to do that with my son before he really understood what I was saying.

[Old Dominion Heather]

Question: How old is your daughter?

[Renee in NC]

I get the feeling that maybe this other mother wasn't as... respectful... as she could have been?

 

[looking also at your reply to rwjx2khsmj]

 

I missed this part in the first reading.

 

:grouphug:

[redheadeddaughter]

Just thought I'd mention that some body types find it really hard to fit into the modern jeans (any brand). I have an insanely long torso and no matter what rise level I pick, if it is in my size, it tends to show something if I am bending over (the waist bags or whatever). I had a terrible problem when I was helping out in the nursery for a while and constantly bending over. I was also very self-conscious about it. The only two things that help (and I have to think about it when I'm getting dressed) are long tank tops (and I mean really really long tunic style tank tops that she can ruche up a bit for a gathered effect and then pull down really long if she is going to be sitting cross-legged or something, and Belts (which I find uncomfortable after 2 c-sections).

I mention the long-torso thing b/c it isn't always a question of a girl intentional wanting to draw attention to herself or wanting to be immodest...

 

Also... I love dresses but haven't seen any other mom in a dress 'round these parts in a few years (apart from weddings and easter). We live in Cali and everyone wears jeans all the time (even for church). Sometimes I like to wear dresses OVER jeans though and that can be stylish and modest at the same time if you do it right. :)

[funschooler5]

I feel your pain!! Dd 12 and ds 9 both have this problem, and I have had someone comment on it to me (as if I didn't know about it already...I'm sure there are people out there that think my kids' last name is "pull your pants up" because I repeat it so much!) Dd is overweight and ds is skinny, so pants don't fit them. We've tried all combinations of jeans, stretch pants, belts, no belts, plus size, slim, regular sizes...nothing works! I just buy them giant shirts, and even then they still manage to show their behinds every once in awhile. I've never tried the long tank top thing, though....I will try that, but My dd especially is tall, and I don't know if there are any shirts long enough.

[CalicoKat]

I get the feeling that maybe this other mother wasn't as... respectful... as she could have been?

 

[looking also at your reply to rwjx2khsmj]

I'm not sure how she could have approached this differently or more politely. It IS a problem. It's just discouraging to try and "fix" something isn't an easy fix. And I'm really tired today.

[CalicoKat]

Question: How old is your daughter?

she's days from being 11.

[Barb_]

It sounds as if her pants aren't fitting her well. If you are buying her waist-high pants in the little girl section and she is beginning to grow hips, it could be that parts of the pants are too wide and others too narrow. What if you were to head to Gap or Old Navy or Gymboree and look for jeans with hidden elastic adjustable waists? I buy the hip-high jeans for my kids because they find them more comfortable, but without the adjustable waist, the pants would slide right off of them. They are all way skinny around the hip area. It's possible that a well-cut mid-rise (below the navel) might be more modest for your daughter than the waist high pants that she can't keep up.

 

Barb

[Old Dominion Heather]

In that case, I think that the other mom needs to mind her own business. Get your daughter some cute belts and some long tank-tops and don't worry about it anymore.

 

I think the other mom was completely out of line to talk to you about it at all. If it was a problem, she could have just whispered to your daughter to pull down her shirt. She was just looking for somethig to be catty about, I think. It would be different if you had asked for her opinion.

[Mrs Mungo]

In that case, I think that the other mom needs to mind her own business. Get your daughter some cute belts and some long tank-tops and don't worry about it anymore.

 

I think the other mom was completely out of line to talk to you about it at all. If it was a problem, she could have just whispered to your daughter to pull down her shirt. She was just looking for somethig to be catty about, I think. It would be different if you had asked for her opinion.

 

:iagree: She's 10 for crying out loud, it's not like she's purposely showing off her thong, sheesh.

[MrsMe]

I buy pants from Lands End to alleviate so many of these short rise pants.

 

But I would insist on long shirts and higher underwear (and not racey ones that people can see) and or like another pp mentioned dresses.

 

I saw a parent at our karate class who wore low rise pants and you could plainly see the Y of her g-string, red laced underwear. (sheesh). :ohmy: Then there's the mom's butt cracks I see. :ack2: Good grief, I could go my whole life without having to deal with that.

[Renee in NC]

In that case, I think that the other mom needs to mind her own business. Get your daughter some cute belts and some long tank-tops and don't worry about it anymore.

 

I think the other mom was completely out of line to talk to you about it at all. If it was a problem, she could have just whispered to your daughter to pull down her shirt. She was just looking for somethig to be catty about, I think. It would be different if you had asked for her opinion.

 

:iagree:

 

It is only a problem if someone wants to make it one. It served no other purpose than to upset you - it isn't like you didn't know!

[AngieW in Texas]

My oldest and youngest have this problem with all jeans except Canyon River Blues from Sears. They are both very hippy with slim waists. Canyon River Blues jeans fit them like they are tailor-made. All other jeans (even the jeans with adjustable waists) leave gaps at the back.

 

It's been very difficult since my oldest grew out of girl size 16, because Canyon River Blues don't come in junior sizes. She has made do with pants from Kohl's, but that only works because she prefers really long shirts.

[Nestof3]

This will happen to me as well if my shirts are not long enough.

[SonshineLearner]

You can insist/offer (whatever) that she wear a body shirt... (like a leotard with snaps at the cr+tch) or do something like.... http://www.thebellyhugger.com/pages/Sizeinfo.php My step daughter that lives with us half time... has this situation too... http://www.daz3d.com/i/shop/itemdetails?item=2772

 

:-)

[missmoe]

Target has house brand camisoles in the girls underwear dept that have worked well for my dds. They come in a three pack and are actually made from pretty fabrics. Long and perfect for layering.

[tex-mex]

I have only a son -- so here is a guess since I don't raise girls:

 

Perhaps the clothing company for tweens/teens no longer makes pants to be traditional "cut"? The pant buttoning over the belly button? Just a thought. :confused:

[StephanieZ]

I don't intentionally give my dd low-rise pants. In fact, all of her jeans/pants are actually the classic cut -- snaps/buttons near the belly button region. But she manages to wear her pants all on the hips area which is problematic because when she bends overs, sits down, etc too much of her backend is revealed. I've coached her on this before, paid extra attention to the pants I buy her, and today I had to tell her that I'd gotten feedback from another homeschool mom that it was troubling and I needed to fix it.

 

I don't know how to fix it. Other than making her wear dresses continually which isn't her preference.

 

Thoughs or suggestions?

 

Could you make her wear long tunic style tops? Or tucked in tops?

 

Or leggings and swing tops? The elastic in leggings might keep them up better?

 

FWIW, I only buy my kids pants at retail stores if the can try them on. One time at Old Navy, exactly zero of a dozen pairs did not show too much rear end! I find Land's End pants to be great, and I order them when they are on clearance. . . Target, Old Navy, etc are very much a crap shoot, so I only shop for pants there if dds are with me try them on. (Leggings or sweats are OK, tho.)

[nd293]

How old is dd? A lot of young girls don't have much in the way of hips, and it can be really difficult to get the pants to stay up. Dd9 also hates the feel of anything around her waist. Elasticated waists are better, as are the ones with adjustable elastic waistbands.

 

Otherwise, I tend to buy longer T-shirts / tunic top style tops for her.

[CalicoKat]

How old is dd? A lot of young girls don't have much in the way of hips, and it can be really difficult to get the pants to stay up. Dd9 also hates the feel of anything around her waist. Elasticated waists are better, as are the ones with adjustable elastic waistbands.

 

Otherwise, I tend to buy longer T-shirts / tunic top style tops for her.

My baby's got back. She's African American.

[Tracy in Ky]

My dd (almost 10) wears a lot of Lands' End dresses with leggings (buy them on sale). They are soft and comfortable.

 

For a very casual look, we have found that athletic pants work pretty well; they don't seem to be cut as low (buy them at Target). The good thing is that many of the shirts for girls now are very long, probably because of the layering craze going on.

 

It is hard to find pants that are cut to stay up. I can't even buy blue jeans for myself right now. They look too gross on me! lol. I'm waiting for the styles to change.

 

If we disapprove of something that our daughter wants to wear, we just tell her she can't wear it and then explain why. Until she is old enough and wise enough to make the decisions for herself (that we approve of), we do it for her. That's just the way it is. We still do the same for ds15 at times. Dd got a nightgown for Christmas from a family member. It has a logo and picture on the front which is exactly the opposite of the image we want her to have of herself, so we told her that we didn't want her to wear it and explained why. Then we told her that we would go to the store and pick out a more appropriate one. (Then she asked if she could just have the money instead :lol: )

 

It really comes down to picking your battles carefully. For us modesty is a very high priority--both in training our daughter how to dress and training our son to consider messages teen girls are sending in the way they dress. As he considers what kind of girl to choose for a wife, the way she dresses is huge. We explain to him that the kind of girl that at first catches the eye--provocatively and scantily dressed--is likely not the kind of godly girl that he wants to choose for a wife.

 

I said more than I intended, but there it is. :D

 

Hugs,

Tracy

[LauraGB]

My dd used to have that problem. And she's very curvy. The jeans at Gap were the only ones we could find that stayed stylish and fit well. You might give it a try.

 

I am not curvy and I have to wear a belt. I wear them on my hips, too; its just more comfortable to me, and I'm short waisted, so higher just looks goofy. My jeans get stretchier and looser during the day and without a belt, its hard to avoid the inevitable.

[CalicoKat]

My dd (almost 10) wears a lot of Lands' End dresses with leggings (buy them on sale). They are soft and comfortable.

 

For a very casual look, we have found that athletic pants work pretty well; they don't seem to be cut as low (buy them at Target). The good thing is that many of the shirts for girls now are very long, probably because of the layering craze going on.

 

It is hard to find pants that are cut to stay up. I can't even buy blue jeans for myself right now. They look too gross on me! lol. I'm waiting for the styles to change.

 

If we disapprove of something that our daughter wants to wear, we just tell her she can't wear it and then explain why. Until she is old enough and wise enough to make the decisions for herself (that we approve of), we do it for her. That's just the way it is. We still do the same for ds15 at times. Dd got a nightgown for Christmas from a family member. It has a logo and picture on the front which is exactly the opposite of the image we want her to have of herself, so we told her that we didn't want her to wear it and explained why. Then we told her that we would go to the store and pick out a more appropriate one. (Then she asked if she could just have the money instead :lol: )

 

It really comes down to picking your battles carefully. For us modesty is a very high priority--both in training our daughter how to dress and training our son to consider messages teen girls are sending in the way they dress. As he considers what kind of girl to choose for a wife, the way she dresses is huge. We explain to him that the kind of girl that at first catches the eye--provocatively and scantily dressed--is likely not the kind of godly girl that he wants to choose for a wife.

 

I said more than I intended, but there it is. :D

 

Hugs,

Tracy

We've always emphasized modesty here too. I was very thankful when pedal-pushers, knee-length shorts came back into style. But cutting off holey blue jeans and edging them with cute lace and trim has always worked. It started the day dh asked me not to pick out a wedding dress that was strapless or low cut. He said that he didn't want leacherous old men staring at his bride.

 

I think that's what bothered me more than anything when this lady came up to me. I spend a ton of time on the kids clothes making sure they're modest and well, this was a huge failure for me.

[ConnieB]

I will second the long tank tops. My older DD who is almost 16 wears jeans every day and it is difficult to find ones that come high enough, so she wears a long tank top most days under her shirts or sweatshirts. It's a great solution to the crack problem.

 

Where do you find long tops?