Regarding the "sub boards" of this board. Warning: Secular content

[LaxMom]

:001_huh:

 

I'm so conflicted.

 

I grew up in the South, where we were raised to use copious amounts of Cream of Whatever soup. Recently, I have been doubting my dependence on Cream of Whatever soup and experimenting with stepping away from the Campbells. It's so confusing to be confronted with such diversity.

 

 

 

I have faced the same crisis of faith... I'll PM you. :D

[MamaSheep]

No, I just replaced the letters to indicate that it would be whispered in proper company.

 

Like when my grandmother wished to share unpleasant news, e.g. "Do you remember Charlie L? {whisper} cancer" or "I just ran into Martha at the market... {whisper} Divorce" Also, there is a certain lip-pursing sequence associated, for the true believers.

 

You're not a real Crock Potter, if you don't get that.

 

Thank you for enlightening me. I am a relatively new Crock Potter, so I am still learning all the proper conventions.

[MamaSheep]

Would it be heresy to say that I think there is much truth and usefulness in all methods of cookery, even though I believe Crock Potting to be superior? For example, many methods of cooking use the very same ingredient preparation techniques as Crock Potting and I can't help but think that they've at least got that part right, even if they then choose to put the ingredients in an oven, or even a microwave.

[Avila]

Would it be heresy to say that I think there is much truth and usefulness in all methods of cookery, even though I believe Crock Potting to be superior? For example, many methods of cooking use the very same ingredient preparation techniques as Crock Potting and I can't help but think that they've at least got that part right, even if they then choose to put the ingredients in an oven, or even a microwave.

 

Gasping! A microwave? The very fast track to F_t C_mp?

 

No! I'll stick with my sacred texts of the manual and Crock Pot recipes and continue with my un-burnt Crock Pot offerings, thank you very much.

[Twinmom]

:smilielol5: This is absolutely the funniest thing I have read all week! THANK YOU, thank you, thank you ladies for helping me lighten up! I really needed that today.

 

 

 

Oh, and BTW, I am a six qt, black colored-only Crock pot gal myself. I consider anything lower in size or with any of those fancy colors to be completely a waste of time, even to warm up wieners! We have a big family as ordained by our cult, thus we use the only proper and right Crock pot size as decreed by our group...extra large! Also, I cannot believe that an intelligent group of ladies like yourselves would indulge in such a base activity as warming wieners in a Crock pot. Everyone in decent society knows that the only way to warm up a wiener properly is in a pot of water on your own stove...or maybe a microwave in a pinch, but certainly only your OWN microwave, not another's!

 

:D

[Rich with Kids]

So how about the men? Do they crock? Does size matter to them?

[MamaSheep]

So how about the men? Do they crock? Does size matter to them?

Men? Are they allowed in the kitchen?

[DarlaS]

So how about the men? Do they crock?

 

Probably not. You know they are pretty much all about instant gratification right? :D

[Rich with Kids]

Men? Are they allowed in the kitchen?

 

Depends on the size of their crock. :D

[LaxMom]

Would it be heresy to say that I think there is much truth and usefulness in all methods of cookery, even though I believe Crock Potting to be superior? For example, many methods of cooking use the very same ingredient preparation techniques as Crock Potting and I can't help but think that they've at least got that part right, even if they then choose to put the ingredients in an oven, or even a microwave.

 

They may appear to employ the same techniques, and some methods even predate Crock Potting by thousands of years, but they were all just to prepare the world for the Rival Arrival.

 

And I agree with Shelly - even casual microwave dabbling is a ticket straight to F_t C_mp.

[Jean in Newcastle]

The Ten Commandments of Crock-Pottery

 

1. Thou shalt have no other slow-cookers before you.

 

2. Thou shalt not make an image of your Crock-Pot for it is copyrighted in the land.

 

3. Thou shalt not take the name of a Crock Pot lightly or pronounce the words "Microwave" or "Stove Top".

 

4. Thou shalt use your Crock Pot 6 days a week but on the 7th day you are permitted to call out for pizza.

 

5. Honor your Crock Pot dealer that your warranty may be prolonged.

 

6. Thou shalt not skewer weiners.

 

7. Thou shalt not look longingly at other brands.

 

8. Thou shalt not steal Crock-Pot recipes esp. those that use Cream of Whatever soup.

 

9. Thou shalt not praise your neighbor's slow cooking insincerely.

 

10. Thou shalt not covet your neighbor's Crock-Pot (and don't even think about it if it is another brand of slow cooker).

 

From the "Jean in Newcastle" version

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

So how about the men? Do they crock? Does size matter to them?

 

Well, I have to tell you, my dh was very anti-Crock when we first got married. He remained anti-Crock even after the children started arriving. I tried not to nag him about how good the Crock was or how it could change our family. Upon the advice of a wise friend, I simply began using the Crock quietly. Once he saw how dinnertime was changed, and how the Crock had made preparation time easier he began to be more open to the Crock. After a while, he even admitted there were a few Crock meals he saw value in.

 

Now, many years later, he is a Crock believer. He will even Crock independently and has discovered new and creative ways to use the Crock. Our family life has definately improved. There are times when we forget the Crock, but I know it is always there, under the cupboard, waiting to make dinnertime easy. Then one of us will take out the Crock and we'll remember how wonderful it is.

 

Oh, and one more thing...now that he is a full Crock believer, he refuses to buy the cream of whatever soup. From time to time I do, but he chastises me and reminds me of how the Crock must remain pure.

[secular_mom]

Thanks ladies. Best thread I've read all week.

 

 

And I love my crock pot....West Bend here.....

 

West Bend Girls

[DarlaS]

They may appear to employ the same techniques, and some methods even predate Crock Potting by thousands of years, but they were all just to prepare the world for the Rival Arrival.

 

So that ancient summer ritual of gathering around the open flame of the back-yard grill is really an anti-crockpot heathen-ish practice? Uh oh... :leaving:

 

I'm afraid I've been outed! :D

[Stacia]

Men? Are they allowed in the kitchen?

 

As a kitchen agnostic, I'm ambivalent about the existence of a kitchen. (Hence, I'm not a crock-potter, or any kind of potter for that matter...). Dh, otoh, is a strict kitchen adherent of the orthodox from-scratch branch (which does shun crock-pottery). Our family seems to be dividing along gender lines too: ds is leaning toward kitchen from-scratch orthodoxy, whild dd is more of a kitchen agnostic like me.

[MamaSheep]

As a kitchen agnostic, I'm ambivalent about the existence of a kitchen. (Hence, I'm not a crock-potter, or any kind of potter for that matter...). Dh, otoh, is a strict kitchen adherent of the orthodox from-scratch branch (which does shun crock-pottery). Our family seems to be dividing along gender lines too: ds is leaning toward kitchen from-scratch orthodoxy, whild dd is more of a kitchen agnostic like me.

 

Well, you should just inform your dh that Crock Pottery is just a modernized version of ancient orthodox techniques of slow-cooking. It just substitutes electricity for hot coals. Otherwise, it's practically the same thing.

[LaxMom]

The Ten Commandments of Crock-Pottery

 

1. Thou shalt have no other slow-cookers before you.

 

2. Thou shalt not make an image of your Crock-Pot for it is copyrighted in the land.

 

3. Thou shalt not take the name of a Crock Pot lightly or pronounce the words "Microwave" or "Stove Top".

 

4. Thou shalt use your Crock Pot 6 days a week but on the 7th day you are permitted to call out for pizza.

 

5. Honor your Crock Pot dealer that your warranty may be prolonged.

 

6. Thou shalt not skewer weiners.

 

7. Thou shalt not look longingly at other brands.

 

8. Thou shalt not steal Crock-Pot recipes esp. those that use Cream of Whatever soup.

 

9. Thou shalt not praise your neighbor's slow cooking insincerely.

 

10. Thou shalt not covet your neighbor's Crock-Pot (and don't even think about it if it is another brand of slow cooker).

 

From the "Jean in Newcastle" version

 

I think the JiNV has corrupted the meaning of the original Porkuguese texts. The version I have reads: Number Six: Thou shalt not pierce the sausage.

 

It would be interesting to back to the original 1970 text and have it directly translated, wouldn't it?

[LaxMom]

So that ancient summer ritual of gathering around the open flame of the back-yard grill is really an anti-crockpot heathen-ish practice?

 

Well, you should just inform your dh that Crock Pottery is just a modernized version of ancient orthodox techniques of slow-cooking. It just substitutes electricity for hot coals. Otherwise, it's practically the same thing.

 

Yes, exactly. And if anyone is in need of further convincing, there is information of the rightness of the Crock Pot here. Scroll down.

[DarlaS]

And if anyone is in need of further convincing, there is information of the rightness of the Crock Pot here. Scroll down.

 

I do feel the need to point out that the Crock Pot on that site really looks more like a stock pot. They're just going to confuse people. :D

Edited April 15, 2009 by darlasowders

[LaxMom]

Ladies, I am so sad. I'm hoping you'll warm your crocks for me. I just realized I have been led astray. I don't know how it happened, but I just looked down and realized that, not only did I totally miss listening to Marketplace...

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm so beside myself, I don't know if I can type the words

{ok, deep breath}

 

 

 

I forgot to make supper! :crying: So, please, if you're inclined toward Crock warming, please remember me. I'm going to go put the beans I have soaking in the Crock and see if I can find my way again.

[LisaNY]

Let's not open that can of worms, ok?

 

pssst!!! I think you may have just offended all the users of Cream of Whatever soup without realizing it. :leaving:

[MamaSheep]

This has been so entertaining...er...I mean uplifting. But I'm afraid that in observing Sister Angela's unforgivable folly I have realized it is time for me to go put my (previously assembled, homemade) frozen lasagna in the oven and get to work on some completely non-Crock Pot related household duties.

 

For the record I'd like to state in all seriousness that I'm glad we're able to laugh at ourselves a little, regardless of our religious persuasions and I hope that everyone understands that everything I contributed to the discussion was all meant in good fun and not as a slam against anyone else or their beliefs, religious or otherwise.

[LaxMom]

pssst!!! I think you may have just offended all the users of Cream of Whatever soup without realizing it. :leaving:

 

I think you are taking my comment out of context. I was clearly referring to the Great Utensil Debate. If the Cream of Whatever crowd are going to make the stretch to be offended by that, they will have to own their reaction. Or maybe they're looking for a reason to be offended.

[Audrey]

Every night is weiner heating night. **cue bad porn music**

 

 

Okay, now that crosses the line. I'm so deeply offended that you would s*xualize something as sacred as the weiners. Isn't the media doing enough damage to that?

[Audrey]

 

4. Thou shalt use your Crock Pot 6 days a week but on the 7th day you are permitted to call out for pizza.

 

 

 

 

Are you using one the those "new" translations of the Manual? Because the correct translation clearly states that we are COMMANDED on the 7th day to call out for pizza.

[ChristyB in TN]

:lol: I've missed you all.

[kalanamak]

Well, I refuse to give in to KC (kitchen correctness).

 

Wait, wait, at least 10% of us have NEVER crockpotted and we demand pressure cookers be equally represented. We are your sons and daughters, even if some of us as IN THE CLOSET (on the bottom shelf).

[Lovedtodeath]

Karen, I have a feeling the secular group may have Christians in it who prefer to use secular homeschooling materials because their beliefs are not mainstream. Just FYI.

 

So if I said I believe that the base, removable crock, and lid are each separate items that function together to meet a common goal, rather than believing that they are each different expressions of a single object ...would you all throw tomatoes at me?

You are free to believe that, but you must sign a form stating otherwise if you wish to join my Cooking support group. Because in order to support Cooking, we all must agree on these Crock Pot things. Edited April 15, 2009 by Lovedtodeath

[Katrina]

Are you using one the those "new" translations of the Manual? Because the correct translation clearly states that we are COMMANDED on the 7th day to call out for pizza.

 

I'm sorry you guys, but I think we have to realize that times have change. Things that might have been inapropriate in the past really have no basis in modern life. I'm sure that once upon a time it was considered a "sin" to not cook from your crock pot 6 days a week. Now, don't get me wrong, I have two crock pots that I love very much. One's round and one's oval, so I have no excuse not to cook whatever cut of meat I want, regardless of shape. I also have 3 different crock pot cookbooks, and numerous recipies collected on my computer. But there is always more than one path to the dinner table, and if I call for pizza tonight (which I had already intended on doing before I ever opened this thread), my crock pots will be very understanding, even if today is Wed and not the 7th day of the week. So please don't judge me, but I've got a phone call to make... ;)

Edited April 15, 2009 by Katrina

[Lovedtodeath]

 

I think you are taking my comment out of context. I was clearly referring to the Great Utensil Debate. If the Cream of Whatever crowd are going to make the stretch to be offended by that, they will have to own their reaction. Or maybe they're looking for a reason to be offended.

:lol:

[Jenny in Atl]

Can't we just make stew? :001_wub:

[Peela]

So how about the men? Do they crock? Does size matter to them?

 

My man is meatless, and a Microwave Man through and through. Hes not happy about the crock pot using so much power over so many hours. Hes not happy about the lamb I put in it. He feels the lamb should still be skipping around in the fields while he eats microwaved supermarket vegetarian lasagna.

He does have other redeeming features and so far the crock pot is winning his battle against it.

[newlifemom]

Can't we just make stew? :001_wub:

 

 

:lol:

[sleepy]

 

 

 

I feel so left out. I don't own a crock pot.

[sleepy]

Heated weiners are the best weiners.

 

Oh, so now we're off on a wiener tangent, huh? Well, you just better not mention kilts, or I'm outta here, baby! :tongue_smilie:

[LaxMom]

Oh, so now we're off on a wiener tangent, huh? Well, you just better not mention kilts, or I'm outta here, baby! :tongue_smilie:

 

Kilts! Madam! Go forth and acquire a Crock! I shall say Kilts to you again if you do not appease us.

 

(Sometimes, I feel like my whole life has been written by the Monty Python crew.)

[Avila]

 

 

 

I feel so left out. I don't own a crock pot.

 

Would it help if we try to convert you? If you would just buy the Crock Pot and read the manual, I am sure you would come to the same conclusion.

 

ETA: I don't even want to attempt the question of why you don't ALREADY own a Crock Pot. Didn't you have a wedding shower? ;)

Edited April 16, 2009 by Asenik

[littlebug42]

Thanks Ladies for the laughs. I haven't laughed out loud like this in a while.

 

BTW- the only way to crock-pot is with a removable crock. I accept no other reality.

[Mama Bear]

{I am finding this thread's absurdity sanity saving today, as well... has everyone else's kids developed a weird, infuriating, collective personality disorder, or am I just lucky?}

 

You are both lucky and cursed. And sooo not alone. Thanks for the goofiness and the sanity, carefully cloaked in crock-pot punditry. :D :lol:

[Carol in Cal.]

Oh, so now we're off on a wiener tangent, huh? Well, you just better not mention kilts, or I'm outta here, baby! :tongue_smilie:

 

Worn traditionally? Or not?

 

Inquiring minds want to know!

[KidsHappen]

Every night is weiner heating night. **cue bad porn music**

 

Ok, I was already giggling but this just pushed me right over the edge and now I am laughing out loud. :lol:

[KidsHappen]

I think we should be specifying which Cream soup here. I mean, I can't be hanging around people using Cream of Mushroom when I am a Cream of Chicken purist. And with the Crockpot, size matters, ladies.

 

Well, my big crockpot has been relagated to the garage for contaminating me (oh, the shame). Now I only use the tiny pot for non-food crocking. Can I still play?

[KidsHappen]

{I am finding this thread's absurdity sanity saving today, as well... has everyone else's kids developed a weird, infuriating, collective personality disorder, or am I just lucky?}

 

Hear ye, hear ye on the sanity saving. :)

[LaxMom]

You are both lucky and cursed. And sooo not alone. Thanks for the goofiness and the sanity, carefully cloaked in crock-pot punditry. :D :lol:

 

Man. You are NOT kidding. There is baaaaaaaad personality mojo at Chez Crazy today. One of the 4 year olds broke a window in their bedroom earlier. (we will ignore, for the moment, that the 8 year old claims he was "just walking by" - not possible - and "hit it with his elbow" - not unless his elbow was about a foot above his head, he didn't...) I just answered a business call (thankfully, another homeschooler) and, in the midst of that, found him IN. MY. DRYER! With the other 4 year old standing lookout.

 

Luckily, I, too, have a small, round Crock, which is perfect for mulled wine. Which I think may be necessary, if the children are not going to be tied up in the closet.

[LaxMom]

Well, my big crockpot has been relagated to the garage for contaminating me (oh, the shame). Now I only use the tiny pot for non-food crocking. Can I still play?

Yes, of course. You clearly just need to be re-educated. :D

[sleepy]

Kilts! Madam! Go forth and acquire a Crock! I shall say Kilts to you again if you do not appease us.

 

(Sometimes, I feel like my whole life has been written by the Monty Python crew.)

 

Ack! You could have ordered me to acquire a shrubbery. I have plenty of those lying about. :D

[sleepy]

Worn traditionally? Or not?

 

Inquiring minds want to know!

 

Ahem. Traditional is the only way to go.

 

[Lovedtodeath]

Ahem. Traditional is the only way to go.

 

:smilielol5:

[MamaSheep]

 

http://www.utilikilts.com/ And that's all I have to say about that.

[Mekanamom]

Wait, wait, at least 10% of us have NEVER crockpotted and we demand pressure cookers be equally represented. We are your sons and daughters, even if some of us as IN THE CLOSET (on the bottom shelf).

 

...And along those lines, we should all strive to be a little more open minded and realize that crock pots, pressure cookers, and rice steamers can actually coexist quite peacefully:

 

Fagor 3-in-1 Electric Multi-Cooker; pressure cooker, slow cooker and rice cooker