PollyOR Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 In the eight years that we've homeschooled, I've been flexible and allowed other people to drop by for "a few minutes." Family members and church members know that we homeschool and yet they still ask to come visit during typical school hours. Honestly, it is visits from church members that bother me the most. I understand that they are trying to run errands while their children are in school. That is convenient for them, and like I said, I've been flexible. But, as my children are getting older, I'm feeling the need to set school hours and say no to these quick interruptions. I have done one positive thing to cut back on interruptions. I've given myself permission to not answer the phone during school. It drives one of my kids nuts that I won't answer the phone. I tell her that if they REALLY want to talk to me, they'll leave a message. They usually don't. So, do you have set school hours and how flexible are you when it comes to well meaning folks who want to come by during school hours? Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JWSJ Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 We're sometimes all over the place with HSing time. Generally, we start in the morning. In the last 2 years no one has ever dropped by during our school hours. (Now I feel strange about that last statement.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 We tend to kept strict hours. Of course, like pp, people don't drop by while we are schooling. Where we used to live, it was an issue as we had several friends that homeschooled and it was easy to speed up the day so we could get together. I probably wouldn't do that now. Honestly, homeschooling is my job. I wouldn't allow people to just come visit if I worked outside of the home, that would be rude, right? I used to allow phone calls from one of my homeschooling friends distract me from school. It was our first year and it created discipline problems. It made me realize that if I don't take my son's education seriously, how can I expect him to? :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 They don't get past the front door. I chat politely for a few minutes and then suggest I drop by sometime out of school hours. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm way too flexible, and we don't have people popping in! With 1-4 daytime activities each week, I've found it very difficult to set a strict schedule. 9 times out of 10, I do answer the phone b/c many of my family members have tight schedules and we touch base when we can or risk missing each other for another week or more. I've never been a scheduled person, but I need to make some changes. My kids seem to be handling it just fine, but I'm starting to go out of my mind! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TraceyS/FL Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I was wayyyy more flexible until Dec 28. The world changed that day around here - and GONE is my being flexible and "nice". It kicks up to the next level on Monday :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm not flexible, but I am polite at the door like Laura. Caller id screens my calls and in all honestly people understand if you tell them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athena1277 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I live far enough away from most friends (I live in the next town) that people stopping by is not a problem. My problem is with my in-laws who want to come by in the middle of the week and spend the night. This usually means we miss at least one day of school that week. They do this a lot (every 4-6 weeks) as they travel due to the mission work FIL does. I'm trying to set boundries, but it's hard. Do I tell them they can't come b/c of school? Then when would my kids see them? (btw, they aren't my fav people anyways, we think too differently, but dh feels obliged to let them come see the kids) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I probably get one a month, so it's not a big problem. If it was, I'd limit them. Just because it's convenient for them does not make it convenient for you. If they need to talk to you, I would say, "I will be available after 2:00" (or whatever times works for you). If they just need to drop something off, they could put it at your front or back door and you could get it at your leisure. This cuts down on unnecessary conversation. If they need to pick something up, you could leave it outside your door for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eleni Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Im WAY too flexible and need to get more strict with a schedule. I need a schedule. :glare: People don't ever pop over, but that is because we are on a small farm about 20 minutes away from anyone...so it isnt like someone is in the neighborhood and thinks "Hey, lets go bug Alana!" ;) However someone may call or email and say "Want to meet us at the park..museum..zoo..etc" and I will say yes. My main problem is that the kids and I find five million other things to be doing. The other day I did sit them down for school and they CHEERED!!! "YAY MATH! YAY WE ARE DOING SCHOOOOL" How pathetic is that???? :001_huh: On the plus side Im happy where they are academically and they are are very self motivated. :001_smile: but yeah, Im working on getting us onto that dread word....schedule. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 It sounds like you are wanting to move away from letting these well-meaning people interrupt you. You could start telling them, very nicely, very politely, very sincerely, that the kids are at an age where they need to really concentrate their subjects, as the depth of their studies has increased with age. Or something like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoughCollie Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am inflexible. I do not answer the door or the phone during school hours unless DH calls. I figure if someone drops by, they are taking the risk that we are not available. I don't care if they think we are home because, in my view, we are not -- we are at school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamrachelle Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsmommyx3 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 has a do not disturb sign that she hangs on her door during school hours. She said that people got the hint and stopped coming over during school hours. It says PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB...WORK IN PROGRESS. I will be available after 3:00pm. I thought it was a pretty cute idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Poop happens - must deal with the poop when it happens. If not dealt with immediately more and more severe consequences will present themselves immediately such as items to to scrubbed, objects to wash, piles to keep the dog from eating. Similarily unfed children will not be subdued until they're fed. The longer we delay feeding their inner beast the larger it becomes. Critial mass arrives when Ma looses her cool and piles everyone into the van for a carbohydrate feast at a local fast food joint. Then the budget is blown. . . . The snow ball affect is huge here. Deal with it or you will pay dearly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am inflexible with my mornings now, which I never was before, but flexible with my afternoons. I used to be completely flexible but then we never got anything done. With afternoons being flexible, usually we are already done school, but if not we at least have covered a lot in the am and I am not as worried about it. For example, on Monday afternoon I am taking my 7 month old baby nephew for the afternoon so my sister can do a substitute teaching gig at her place of employment(so much for her mat leave). I couldn't do that without being flexible, and I am uber excited to have him join us. I think I have found a good balance now to be rigid and guard our mornings, and be more flexible with the afternoon. That said I still do not say yes to everything, I am trying to limit our time away from home in general otherwise we would be on the go 7 days a week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenschooler Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 Zero flexibility. We'd never get anything done, otherwise. No one just 'pops by' my house, either. Most people I know are plenty busy themselves during the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetTN Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I screen all phone calls and just don't answer the door during school time. I tried being polite and answering the door, but some friends just don't get it. I have explained how disruptive it can be, but they just agree with me and act like I'm talking about everyone except them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm the exact opposite and would love to have interruptions. Very few people call us or stop by and, if they did, we'd have no problems with the interruption. We have no real schedule with school. We do it...whenever...and have no problems with dropping what's planned for a park day, field trip, or play date. As it is, we are too far ahead of schedule already this year and I'm finding myself having to order most of next year's curriculum this month so my kids have something to do for school (we are required to meet a minimum number of school hours each week through June). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen in PA Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am very flexible, but we haven't encountered many problems. We live too far from most of our friends to have people dropping in, and I screen phone calls. When I do answer the phone and get chatting, it's usually with my mother, who does not seem to understand that we have to stay somewhat on schedule with school, so that can be a problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
battlemaiden Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 has a do not disturb sign that she hangs on her door during school hours. She said that people got the hint and stopped coming over during school hours. It says PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB...WORK IN PROGRESS. I will be available after 3:00pm. I thought it was a pretty cute idea. This is what I do. We *do* have frequent doorbell ringers in our neighborhood- adults and children. I have to switch the sign up occassionally because they get used to seeing it and start ignoring the sign. I have also had friends from other neighborhoods (other military wives) who were in the area try to stop by. We live close to a Walmart. They almost always call first and when I don't answer the phone they usually get the hint. If they come over anyways, it only takes a quick look at the dining room table to realize it isn't a good time.;) Sometimes I feel it is important to set aside work for a particular visitor. I don't have a set rule- I sort of go with my gut. It then becomes a lesson in hospitality for the children---they need to learn that sort of schooling too. But I try to make this a rare event. Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am flexible but do not answer the door or phone during school hours unless it is someone I need to talk to or see. Generally, it works out well. Even my MIL knows to call in the afternoon when she wants to see the boys. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am less flexible than I used to be. It seems to "count" more than, say, Kindergarten. We have a number of outside commitments as well, and I've figured out our weekly schedule to keep those times "blocked out" for regular school work. And then I laminated it and put it on the back door. (Really, so the 3rd grader doesn't go through the "gee, we have piano today, must mean no school work" thing.) People don't usually stop in, but they do call. I generally ignore the phone and call the person back when it's more convenient for me to do so. We have caller-id. They don't have to leave a message, I just call back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest janainaz Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm flexible, but within reason. My ds8 has to get his work done - we do year-round school, 4 days per week. I answer the phone SOMETIMES. But, I am balancing a 4 year old and my son doing school. When my ds4 starts an actual curriculum, I will have to make sure school is our priority during the day. Right now, I am still flexible in taking a break to go to the park because my little guy needs my time, too. I am always open to visitors, I don't get many. So, whenever there is an opportunity to nurture relationships, the door is wide open. Our society makes education and schooling top priority. It IS important and we all know why. But, life itself is more precious and people matter more. I don't mean in the sense of interruptions or others not respecting that we ARE doing "school", but if my son has an opportunity to see a friend and play, or, if I have a friend in need - people are first. School will get done. I talk on the phone before 9am. During the day, I very often let the phone ring unless it's my dh. There are not enough hours in the day to give all I want to my boys. I've gone through zone-out periods where I find myself on this computer and it sucks away hours of my life where I could be doing something more productive. So, I've been putting a hault on that as well and limiting my cyber-world time. It's a balance and life is unpredictable. Each day is different and I like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamaof2andtwins Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I am not very flexible at all. I don't like to be forced into morning appointments or other such things. I do not answer the phone typically while we are doing school. We, generally, do not have interruptions, but they do occur every now and again. Jennie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dayle in Guatemala Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 We homeschool in the mornings and if it trickles into the afternoons, so be it, but, I'm not too flexible when it comes to our schedule. It's too disrupting and hard to keep focused. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nukeswife Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm one of those that doesn't live near family and we tend to not have friends that would just stop by. We move so much we just don't make friends like that. My mom used to call me during school time but then I told her at one of her visits that we try to get school done during 1100-1500, so she doesn't call then anymore, unless it's an emergency and I know if it is becasue she calls the house phone instead of my cell phone. My dad only calls my cell and not very often so I usually just call him back because he'll leave a message. If my brother calls I will answer because he rents our old house and if he's calling it's something about the house. He always keeps thing short and too the point so I don't mind. As for visitors at the door, I usually don't get any, and if someone knocks it's a delivery or someone that can't read or doesn't know what "NO SOLICITATION" means. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 If you have friends who you actually love, drop by to see you...I'd consider myself loved. I mean, you are fortunate. Perhaps I'm just anti-friendly, but I would jump up and down if people, especially with kids my kids' ages, dropped by to say, "Hi." I'm not talking about dropping by for me to watch their kids, but a "I'm in the neighborhood" I grew up where you knock instead of ring the doorbell...and family stays with you when coming by your area. They also help you wash the dishes after dinner and such.....Not come for maid service. I envy some of you who are talking about friends and neighbors being bothersome. Maybe you make better cookies than me! Carrie:-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 We aren't very flexible here either. If it's prearranged that's one thing but drop bys don't really happen around here. We have the most momentum and energy in the morning here so I try to take full advantage of that and school in the morning. Afternoons are much more flexible and I'll put off activities if need be. I thrive with a schedule as do my boys. I'm pretty good at explaining to family members that while we do have flexibility to help with doctors appts. and family needs that our schooling hours should be uninterupted. So far, not to many problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I do answer the phone b/c many of my family members have tight schedules and we touch base when we can or risk missing each other for another week or more. This is why I love email and text messaging. The message will sit there and wait until myself or the other person is able to answer it. Not to mention that reading is more convenient than listening when there's a toddler yahooing around the house! :) Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jolash Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 has a do not disturb sign that she hangs on her door during school hours. She said that people got the hint and stopped coming over during school hours. It says PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB...WORK IN PROGRESS. I will be available after 3:00pm. I thought it was a pretty cute idea. :iagree: That's what I've done and it's cut down on the number of knocking/doorbell ringing interruptions. And since setting up a dedicated school room, we can shut the door and we don't even hear the phone ringing. I've found that as ds has gotten older, the fewer outside distractions the better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 In the earlier years I was completely flexible. We were able to work it out, so I didn't stress too badly about it. However, an ongoing family drama (close relative with a brain tumor) intruded too much on school time. Also, dd was getting older and her workload was getting heavier. When I added in schooling my ds I had to become completely inflexible and rigid about school. Now I screen my calls carefully and absolutely do NOT make outside plans during our school time. This has been good for our family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookmomma Posted January 10, 2009 Share Posted January 10, 2009 I'm pretty flexible. Life happens. I do try to stick to homeschooling during the day as long as no one stops by. I ignore phone calls; everyone knows I'll call back when I'm not busy. Other than that, I try to remember that even ps has interruptions--all day long. I also really like that homeschooling can happen whenever and wherever it needs to. We have been through all sorts of ups and downs this past year. Our house was for sale so often we had two hours warning to clean house and get the heck out. The kids helped, and we took our work with us. Then we had to move...that pretty much stopped schooling in its tracks. But now we're on a good schedule again. I like that there are no interruptions, we get so much more done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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