How are you going to handle the holidays this year? Covid talk

[Not_a_Number]

Not sure what we're going to do. I'm not at all convinced we're about done with the Delta surge, given how things went in highly vaccinated Israel. 

However, if the in-laws have boosters and the kids are vaccinated, then we'll probably get together as normal. 

[skimomma]

9 hours ago, TechWife said:

But for half of the U.S. it is not cold during the holidays - that's why they are making the recommendation. They aren't ignorant but are making recommendations for ventilation in a pandemic. In all honesty, they'd probably rather us stay away from each other for another few months, but since they know people won't do that, here we go making the best of a bad situation. If you don't want to use a fan, don't.  For some people, it may be the thing that helps them see family.

I get that.  And understand the intent.  But the flippant, "just run a fan" rubs me the wrong way.  When people are grappling with a second Christmas with isolated family members being alone again, it just stings.  I live in a very harsh climate and we have maintained socializing by being outside despite the weather.  Our fire pits and snow pants have never seen so much action.  Anyone who lives in a climate where they can open a window and run a fan can (and should) meet outdoors with risky mixed company anyway assuming everyone is healthy and hearty enough to do so.  But this does not work for our elderly and fragile family members.  

I am not really arguing anything here, just that advice like this can feel a little hurtful and dismissive.

In our case, we will celebrate Halloween with friends outdoors.  I handed out candy last year, outdoors and masked, and will do so again this year.  Thanksgiving is still up in the air.  We plan to visit our families in person at their locations but we have one person in assisted living that may or may not be allowing in-person visitors or pick-ups and another side of the family that includes a family of anti-vaxxers/maskers.  We cannot call that one until we know the status of boosters, local surges in infection, and AL rules.  I cannot even think about Christmas yet.  We will be winter camping, outdoors (obviously), for NYE with friends.

[TheReader]

Halloween I will do like normal -- I sit outside in the driveway, with a big bowl of candy to pass out. I will be masked in some kind of mask/face shield (will build my costume around being able to do this) and will drop treats into kids bags, like normal. 

Thanksgiving is up in the air; it's our year to do things with my mom, but after her post today dredged up old hurts, I have zero desire (less than that) to have a formal holiday just us and her. Blah. If I get over that, she and we are all vaccinated, so it would be fine to have her over indoors for a meal. Technically my sister and her kids would be invited, but they've started doing their Thanksgiving on their own (adult kids) instead, so I'm assuming they'll do that this year as well. If she mentions wanting to join us for ours w/Mom (which I doubt), we'll move things outside as my sister is not vaccinated (all her kids are, but not sure about their significant others). 

We're having a pre-Thanksgiving get-together with my inlaws, and all of the eligible folks are vaccinated (all but the too-young niece), so we'll probably do that inside (well, MIL may still want to be outside, we'll leave it up to her), but we've done outdoor gatherings with them and it goes well. We've got our "Covid safe meal with people" routine down pretty well by now. 

Christmas......no idea. MIL will, I think, want to gather. We may use this year to shift it to either our house or SIL's house, where we have more room to spread out since the niece isn't vaccinated and hasn't had Covid yet. MIL's had her booster and is the only one at high risk, so we'll let her decide on that. 

I'm still debating whether I do, or don't, go to Quilt Festival this year. They are requiring masks of all people, at all times, but I think not limiting capacity (although, quite a lot of folks on social media have said they'll skip, due either to the masks or boycotting Texas, so maybe attendance will be down....). So I'm not sure. DH says it's no riskier than the grocery store, but I do think it will be more crowded than that unless I go during the week, possibly. We shall see. 

We are letting DS go to RenFest, but that's outdoors and while crowded, not "crowded" like an indoor space is. 

[catz]

I live in Minnesota and I’d have no issue opening a couple windows and running fans and upping the heat for a one day in person get together indoors.  I don’t see that as dismissive?   It’s a simple way to improve air flow and quality and it’s not all winter?   People are going to do what they want regardless.  

[melmichigan]

I will still be on IV therapy. My MIL still won't vaccinate, so we'll have quiet holidays at home again this year.  

[Dmmetler]

I'm doing a Halloween themed outdoor recital, where the kids will come in costumes if they want. We'll do it like we did in the Spring-digital piano hooked to a speaker system, families bring their own chairs/blankets and space out, kids come up one at a time and play, with masks on-I think some of the parents are planning costumes that masks are part of anyway :). 

 

For Thanksgiving, we'll be renting a condo in Atlanta. L's college only closes W-F, so we decided it made more sense to go there. We'll have a kitchen, so we'll cook something. We'll also zoom with family. (Thanksgiving day is also L's birthday this year).

 

I don't know on Chriwfmas yet, although I have started accumulating gifts. 

[Pam in CT]

We had big plans for extended family Thanksgiving last year -- tents and heaters and multi-state testing protocols and ... we pulled the plug in late October due to surging cases.  We took the RV up to my mother's senior residence (which we were not allowed, at the time, to enter) and did a chilly early dinner under the trees next to the parking lot... which was better than nothing for sure, but Not.The.Same.

This time, the octogenarian generation will all be boostered, all the rest of us except one 6-year old are fully vaccinated, and the plan of record is, we'll be indoors at my house after (again) a multi-state PCR testing protocol.  But if cases surge again or my brother/wife with the 6 year old are skittish, I'll orchestrate outdoors again.  I'd far rather shiver through an abbreviated afternoon event, and *be together,* than anything else.

[Eos]

I wish I knew.

[mom31257]

We  just moved into a new house, and we were told by the sellers that we'll have more kids come for Halloween than we've ever seen in our lives. There was a big discussion on a local FB group, and one person said a few years ago, they had 1000 kids. WHAT???  So I am planning to make small goody bags (not 1000) and put them on a a table outside to help me distance from people. I'll wear a mask, too. 

Thanksgiving will only be with my side of the family because there won't be time to travel to the other side. All my side is fully vaxxed except one sister, who had a child with a documented vaccine injury and who passed away four years ago. She does try to be careful, masking and distancing. She might not come then anyway, though, because of the distance and her schedule. We're around my side of the family often already, so we'll gather as normal unless something changes like a surge of cases or something. 

I'm not sure about a Christmas schedule yet. We'll probably go to the other side for Christmas Day and meet with my family another time of the month. Dh's mom isn't vaxxed because she has had some reactions in the past. She does try to be careful like my sister. I believe the rest are, so we would meet as normal with them. 

[HomeAgain]

1 hour ago, mom31257 said:

We  just moved into a new house, and we were told by the sellers that we'll have more kids come for Halloween than we've ever seen in our lives. There was a big discussion on a local FB group, and one person said a few years ago, they had 1000 kids. WHAT???  So I am planning to make small goody bags (not 1000) and put them on a a table outside to help me distance from people. I'll wear a mask, too. 

 

😮

Our first year here we got about 4 kids.  The next year 10.  I estimate 20, or nearly the entire neighborhood child population this year, minus the kooky family.😄 We don't have a whole lot that come down here.  I thought our old house got a lot, though, and had to turn off the porch light early some years.  I also got mean.  Some lady brought her dog around and was upset I didn't give her candy (seriously, not amused by a 40yo with her hand in my face) and yelled at some kids who decided that my lawn was the best place to throw the trash from the candy they were eating.

Here I can just leave out the cauldron and do my own thing.  The kids will each take one and leave a bunch left.

 

[Janeway]

Not a problem here. Everyone has died that we would have seen other than my own kids and spouse. After my dad died in January, a handful of other family members died. I am begging my oldest sister to visit me for Christmas, but she would probably be happiest at home I guess. She lives on the other side of the country, but we have relatives there that we have always been close. We never visit them on the holidays anymore as we live so far away. 

 

I would like to come up with new traditions. I would be open to even traveling someplace with snow.

 

For Halloween, it will be the same, except no Grandpa to visit in costume to start off the day. For Thanksgiving, it will be just us, as usual. My dad was supposed to eat with us last year, but it was cancelled as he was forced in to governor nazi-mandated solitary confinement of the elderly (even rapists and murderers had more rights than the elderly) with no access to healthcare or the outside world or even sunlight. He said he would come thing year, but now he will not. 

Edited October 6, 2021 by Janeway

[madteaparty]

Same as I did last year. Cracked windows, fans, etc. I’m hosting dinners at Halloween and Thanksgiving (x2) and maybe even Christmas. 

[Spryte]

So, question for those if you who do testing for holiday visits — do you use rapid home tests when guests arrive? PCR a few days before? Both? What’s the strategy?

We have young adults we love who are out at concerts and eating indoors, going to crowded venues. They will be visiting extended family on both sides within hours of coming to our house, who may or may not be vaccinated but don’t mask. We would love to have our young adults stay for Thanksgiving and Christmas visits, but also trying to keep out high risk and unvaccinated people safe. 

[Not_a_Number]

Just now, Spryte said:

So, question for those if you who do testing for holiday visits — do you use rapid home tests when guests arrive? PCR a few days before? Both? What’s the strategy?

We have young adults we love who are out at concerts and eating indoors, going to crowded venues. They will be visiting extended family on both sides within hours of coming to our house, who may or may not be vaccinated but don’t mask. We would love to have our young adults stay for Thanksgiving and Christmas visits, but also trying to keep out high risk and unvaccinated people safe. 

Hmmmm. Good question. If my sister visits, we'll have to grapple with that. 

I would think PCR while quarantined, wait for results? 

[Farrar]

When we test, we use the free city tests unless we're required to do PCR. They're not PCR but they're way better than the rapid tests and they're free and easy. We do them a couple days before then don't do anything risky other than possibly a masked errand after that.

[Loowit]

6 hours ago, mom31257 said:

We  just moved into a new house, and we were told by the sellers that we'll have more kids come for Halloween than we've ever seen in our lives. There was a big discussion on a local FB group, and one person said a few years ago, they had 1000 kids. WHAT???  So I am planning to make small goody bags (not 1000) and put them on a a table outside to help me distance from people. I'll wear a mask, too.

And I though my neighborhood was busy.  We get a lot of kids, but not nearly that many.  Our neighborhood is the place to go on Halloween because is it a lot of houses in suburban setting.  I think the main thoroughfares get around 500, but fortunately we live on a small cul-de-sac out of the way, so we only get between 100-150 each year.  I am going to fill some small bags with candy, and a few with toys for allergy kids, and send them down a zipline that runs from the upstairs to the sidewalk.  I am making up about 100 bags.  When we run out, we close up shop.

[Pam in CT]

(( Janeway ))

 

re pre-family-gathering testing:

1 hour ago, Spryte said:

So, question for those if you who do testing for holiday visits — do you use rapid home tests when guests arrive? PCR a few days before? Both? What’s the strategy?

We have young adults we love who are out at concerts and eating indoors, going to crowded venues. They will be visiting extended family on both sides within hours of coming to our house, who may or may not be vaccinated but don’t mask. We would love to have our young adults stay for Thanksgiving and Christmas visits, but also trying to keep out high risk and unvaccinated people safe. 

All of us except my mother have easy / free or affordable access to PCR testing -- two kids are tested weekly at university; the other and most of my extended family are in NYC where there are free sites scattered in all the neighborhoods; my husband and I have a choice between a community center where it's free (but we wait in line) or a private center where it's by appointment (but $75, not covered by insurance unless we falsely allege we're having symptoms). In all cases the turnaround time is less than 24 hours so it's hardly burdensome to "quarantine" while waiting for results.

There *was* a real testing crunch right before Thanksgiving last year, which was one of the factors that derailed our plans last year; and it's possible that could happen again. I'm not sure how we would navigate through that if it happened. We all have a stock of home antigen tests so we might consider testing everyone twice with those (? not sure how persuasive that would be to me).

My mother, amazingly, has throughout all of this never had a PCR test, and is quite fearful about them; so we're likely **for her** to have her come here early and combine two home antigen tests with a longer "quarantine" interval -- she's comfortable with that.

My brother and SIL, who have a daughter too young to be vaccinated, are kind of acting as the COVID Protocol Tsars; and did so over the summer when we got together as well.  At this point she's the most vulnerable family member, so they have more standing on the protocols than anyone else.

[historically accurate]

@Janeway - big hugs to you. That first holiday season after a loved one's death is so hard. I'm sorry for your losses this past year.

[katilac]

My immediate family is all vaxxed, so I don't have the hard decisions of those with under 12's. 

We don't get a ton of trick or treaters, but I will hand out candy at the door to those who come. If my grown kids want to have a small number of friends over, we'll allow it. 

If we can all get off on Friday, we'll be at our cabin in the woods for Thanksgiving. If not, we'll low-key see parents, siblings, nephews (all vaxxed) but won't be together all day or for the meal. 

Christmas and surrounding weeks, we may see unvaxxed kids under 12 and may be with a slightly bigger crew than usual at times. I'm pretty comfortable with the places we'd meet. We are generally outside as much as possible anyway. We will take ventilation precautions inside, but I don't think anyone will mask. 

Everything is subject to change, of course, and everyone will work to accommodate grandparents and anyone else who is vulnerable. We are lucky because outside is usually an option. 

[lmrich]

Can I be real honest? No idea... but not just because of Covid. 

We usually spend Thanksgiving with my in-laws, but they are in a rental so pretty sure they will not host. I am happy to host, but I am not sure they are happy to travel. AND my girls will not want to travel to their house (if they lived on the farm, yes - but not this rental) since they are both in college and want to be home. AND with all my food allegeries, I would rather cook at home, too. I DO NOT want to go to my sister's house, who is kind of local, because her husband and kids are not vaccinated plus they are so uptight. UGG 

Christmas  - it is too hot here for me to even think about it.