Ashley Judd says Twitter haters are part of a larger problem against girls & women...

[Stacia]

Forget Your Team: Your Online Violence Toward Girls and Women Is What Can Kiss My Ass

 

Part of her post:

Instead, I must, as a woman who was once a girl, as someone who uses the Internet, as a citizen of the world, address personally, spiritually, publicly and even legally, the ripe dangers that invariably accompany being a woman and having an opinion about sports or, frankly, anything else.
 

What happened to me is the devastating social norm experienced by millions of girls and women on the Internet. Online harassers use the slightest excuse (or no excuse at all) to dismember our personhood. My tweet was simply the convenient delivery system for a rage toward women that lurks perpetually. I know this experience is universal, though I'll describe specifically what happened to me.

 

I think the woman is right.

 

And I especially liked her closing...

So for now, I am handing it back over to those of you who are unafraid to speak out against abuse like I have faced, and those of you who are righteous allies and intervening bystanders. You're on it. Keep at it — on the Internet, at home, at work and in your hearts, where the courage to tackle this may fundamentally lie. We have much to discuss, and much action to take. Join me.

 

[Rosie_0801]

This was touched on several times by speakers at an International Women's Day seminar at the Sydney Opera house. 

[Alicia64]

Good for Ashley. I think the anonymity of the internet allows so many to be mildly-bully-ish to downright horrific. I've even had people on here respond very rudely to something I wrote in complete innocence. (I'd written something trying to be helpful to another member and someone responded snarkily.)

 

Why? My guess is because it's anonymous.

 

Monica Lewinsky recently asked, "What happened to compassion?"

 

The more anonymous a situation is. . . the worse the situation turns.

 

Thanks for sharing Ashley's piece.

 

Alley

[Greta]

Woman expresses opinion. Woman receives rape threats.

 

I don't remember this being the way things worked when I was growing up, but it clearly is now.

 

I have no words to express how furious and how sad this makes me - and how absolutely terrifying it is to raise a daughter in this world.

[Laurie]

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all!   But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

[LucyStoner]

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all! But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

Why does her tweet need to be ladylike? Why does that have to be said and how is it relevant?

 

She posted something no more or less incendiary and crude than millions of others post during sporting events.

[kitten18]

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all! But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

Huh?

[kiwik]

I could be missing something but the original comment didn't seem like that big a deal. There are a lot of wankers in the world and being anonymous seems to encourage them. The scary thing is that they are probably quite normal family men and women.

[Mom-ninja.]

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all!   But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

Thanks for this perfect example of a very important point Ashley made in her article. This is the equivalent to "What was she wearing?" or "Was she drunk?" 

 

 

I don't excuse the rapist......BUT (insert some form of victim blaming)

[Mom-ninja.]

I could be missing something but the original comment didn't seem like that big a deal. There are a lot of wankers in the world and being anonymous seems to encourage them. The scary thing is that they are probably quite normal family men and women.

Yes, it the anonymous part that gives people a "free" pass to act inhumanely. 

[Runningmom80]

I'm with her.

[plansrme]

So kick me out of the sisterhood, but I think Ashley Judd is a flake with an inflated sense of her own intelligence and importance.  Really--who cares what anonymous idiots on the internet threaten?  Is she genuinely afraid that one of the Tweeting nitwits is going to make her suck his two-inch *&^%#?  She is comparing Twitter comments to real threats experienced by real people in real life?  This is not the first time she's said something silly, e.g., comparing the Rwandan genocide to certain coal mining practices.  (I dare you to read her blog post that is linked in that article, the whole "my dog feels the pain of this environmental tragedy.")  And also, she's a really bad actress.

[Word Nerd]

Sports fans are crazy on Twitter. Some of the most horrible tweets I've ever read were tweeted directly to players--even by their team's own fans. I thought about reporting a few high school students to a nearby town's police because their trash talking was so overboard—and the the most threatening comment was made by a girl.

[flyingiguana]

Woman expresses opinion. Woman receives rape threats.

 

I don't remember this being the way things worked when I was growing up, but it clearly is now.

 

I have no words to express how furious and how sad this makes me - and how absolutely terrifying it is to raise a daughter in this world.

 

I suspect it was always this way, among certain people.  They just didn't have a world wide forum to express themselves on.

 

I recall accidentally overhearing some pretty horrific comments made by guys about women when I was in college and grad school.  To them it just seemed like the run of the mill way they talked about women.

 

Used to be, too, that a lot of this got expressed anonymously on the wall of the boys' room.  Having worked as a janitor cleaning bathrooms of both sexes, I've come to the conclusion that women are a lot wittier -- and they don't threaten violence as a means of shutting anyone up.  

 

When some boys post on the internet they must still think they're writing on the bathroom wall where they're anonymous and think no woman is reading their little thoughts.

[flyingiguana]

The big difference these days, though, is that one would have to remember to bring a marker into the little boy's room.  These days, the phone's always handy to make any comment that comes to mind.

 

Too bad these thoughts come to anyone's mind, though.

[Anne in CA]

Ashley Judd is not a normal person in many regards. Her work against s#x trafficking is not a normal thing for a celebrity to do. She has extreme views on some subjects. She had a difficult childhood and a difficult family. Her differences don't make the gross threats okay.

 

What is so disturbing is that this sort of thing probably goes through those men's minds all the time. Given the right opportunity those men do molest girls (they were wearing shorts and not acting ladylike, after all) or do other bad things. I don't agree that those are normal guys who vented in a slightly disturbing fashion.

[Greta]

Is she genuinely afraid that one of the Tweeting nitwits is going to make her suck his two-inch *&^%#? She is comparing Twitter comments to real threats experienced by real people in real life?

Of course I would be a lot more frightened of a threat made in person than one made through social media, but that doesn't mean the latter just gets dismissed as if it's nothing. First of all, there's no excuse for saying things like that, whether you do it face to face or by Twitter. Period. And secondly even though they may not intend to follow through on the threat, the threat itself is a form of harassment. They know this, and that's why they do it. They know that the recipient is going to be shocked and hurt by the message, and that is exactly their intention. They want her (us) to be shocked and hurt enough to STFU. That's their whole agenda: to silence women. So even though she isn't perfect, even though I may not agree with her on everything, I am still glad she's speaking out. Because women, all women, even imperfect ones, need a voice.

[Guest]

So kick me out of the sisterhood, but I think Ashley Judd is a flake with an inflated sense of her own intelligence and importance. Really--who cares what anonymous idiots on the internet threaten? Is she genuinely afraid that one of the Tweeting nitwits is going to make her suck his two-inch *&^%#? She is comparing Twitter comments to real threats experienced by real people in real life? This is not the first time she's said something silly, e.g., comparing the Rwandan genocide to certain coal mining practices. (I dare you to read her blog post that is linked in that article, the whole "my dog feels the pain of this environmental tragedy.") And also, she's a really bad actress.

It is never ok to threaten to rape someone, even if it is just on the Internet and even if the victim is a bit of a nutter.

[Greta]

I suspect it was always this way, among certain people. They just didn't have a world wide forum to express themselves on.

I'm sure you're right, and I didn't mean to sound so naive as to believe that guys like this are a new phenomenon. But it seems (though I could be mistaken) that social pressures in previous generations would keep this kind of speech more in check than currently. Now not only do we have the internet to give these jerks a public platform, but there also seems to be a general attitude that if you don't want to hear what these jerks have to say, then it's your fault for being on the internet.

[Mom-ninja.]

Opinions about Ashley Judd aside, the nastiness and inhumane comments on the internet needs to stop. That is what this is about. it's not about Ashley. 

[plansrme]

It is never ok to threaten to rape someone, even if it is just on the Internet and even if the victim is a bit of a nutter.

 

But being threatened with rape by a stranger over the internet (a stranger from whom you do not actually fear physical violence) is not rape or any other form of sexual violence.  Claiming that Tweets are akin to rape only diminishes the experience of those who are actual victims of sexual (or any other kind of ) violence.  I don't think she's really doing her cause any good by pressing criminal charges against crass tweeters.

[Guest]

But being threatened with rape by a stranger over the internet (a stranger from whom you do not actually fear physical violence) is not rape or any other form of sexual violence. Claiming that Tweets are akin to rape only diminishes the experience of those who are actual victims of sexual (or any other kind of ) violence. I don't think she's really doing her cause any good by pressing criminal charges against crass tweeters.

Threatening someone goes beyond crass. These men need to learn that women will not be bullied into silence.

[Greta]

I don't think she's really doing her cause any good by pressing criminal charges against crass tweeters.

Threats of violence should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I don't care if the threat was issued in person, by phone, by letter, or by Twitter. A threat is a threat and is NOT a valid form of discourse. It is a crime.

[Word Nerd]

nm 

 

[unsinkable]

Curt Schilling tweeted he was proud of his DD's college acceptance and it began an avalanche of vile, disgusting tweets from trolls in response.

 

Schilling tracked the posters down and reported them to their schools and workplaces.

 

http://deadspin.com/curt-schilling-goes-dadmode-on-twitter-trolls-bashing-h-1688969687

[Matryoshka]

Gamers can be equally bad. Just look up g am erg ate. (Without the spaces)

This is nothing new but something needs to be done.

This is one way to handle to teen bullies.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6248928

 

Curt Schilling is taking it one step further with the creeps who tweeted threatening and disgusting things to his teen daughter.  He's tracked them down, told their moms and their schools and employers, and then he's going to sue them.  Go Curt.

 

I think this should be what happens to all these creeps.  Once they realize they can be taken to task, and that the internet is not truly anonymous, and that there are repercussions, maybe we can turn a corner...

[Tangerine]

I love the gaming writer Alanah Pearce who tracked down the boys who threatened her with rape and told their mommies. 

[albeto.]

 Once they realize they can be taken to task, and that the internet is not truly anonymous, and that there are repercussions, maybe we can turn a corner...

 

All this will do is encourage people to post their angry, violent, psychopathic rants on anonymous social media accounts. I don't think this was ever not a problem (men just spoke like this out of earshot of women, or to women privately), and I don't think it will ever not be a problem. Aggression is as human a trait as any other behavior, some people have more, some have less. It's not a bad or good thing, but it is problematic when used in hopes to bully people into silence or supplication. 

 

Still, it's a step in a laudable direction - not tolerating "boys will be boys" type excuses. Teaching girls and boys to separate harassing comments from their developing sense of self-identity is another step in the right direction, I think. 

 

The idea that threatening violence and bullying people into silence is wrong, but no so bad when it happens to "those people" is fascinating. People suppress compassion and empathy according to all kinds of criteria, and it's interesting to see where those boundaries are. 

[Guest]

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all! But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

I promise I'm not trying to pile on but I hope you sit a minute and think about why you feel this comment was necessary in a discussion about a woman being threatened with a*al rape. Her words have no bearing in this conversation. Women should be able to express opinions without receiving threats. Men are not threatened with sexual violence just for having an opinion, why are women??

[Matryoshka]

All this will do is encourage people to post their angry, violent, psychopathic rants on anonymous social media accounts. I don't think this was ever not a problem (men just spoke like this out of earshot of women, or to women privately), and I don't think it will ever not be a problem. Aggression is as human a trait as any other behavior, some people have more, some have less. It's not a bad or good thing, but it is problematic when used in hopes to bully people into silence or supplication.

 

I believe those guys thought they were posting anonymously on their social media accounts.  They were tracked down anyway. 

 

We as a society have to stand up and say "no, this is not acceptable behavior, and there will be repercussions".  We cannot say nothing because maybe it will get worse if we stand up to them. 

[Mom-ninja.]

But being threatened with rape by a stranger over the internet (a stranger from whom you do not actually fear physical violence) is not rape or any other form of sexual violence.  Claiming that Tweets are akin to rape only diminishes the experience of those who are actual victims of sexual (or any other kind of ) violence.  I don't think she's really doing her cause any good by pressing criminal charges against crass tweeters.

 

People who threaten (whether in "casual conversation" or not) to do harm to the president of the United States are fully prosecuted. Threatening people is a crime.  

[Mom-ninja.]

Curt Schilling is taking it one step further with the creeps who tweeted threatening and disgusting things to his teen daughter.  He's tracked them down, told their moms and their schools and employers, and then he's going to sue them.  Go Curt.

 

I think this should be what happens to all these creeps.  Once they realize they can be taken to task, and that the internet is not truly anonymous, and that there are repercussions, maybe we can turn a corner...

He is awesome

[Laurie]

Why does her tweet need to be ladylike? Why does that have to be said and how is it relevant?

 

She posted something no more or less incendiary and crude than millions of others post during sporting events.

 

There has been a coarsening of our culture, and I think women have to take some responsibility for this.  

 

Ashley Judd started the anatomical references with her initial tweet...

 

If a woman thinks she's won some sort of gender victory because she gets down in the gutter and plays/talks dirty with the boys who behave that way, then she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place. 

 

 

[Laurie]

 

Your definition of ladylike is really dated, like about 100 years or so. IMO, it's one small reason people think they can degrade and threaten a woman for a few mere words. " I don't excuse the perpetrators, but...." .

 

I'll take my  way of living any day:  Act like a lady...including the way you talk (and tweet).   Only date men who treat you like a lady.  Marry a gentleman, then raise your sons to be gentlemen and your daughters to be ladies. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest]

There has been a coarsening of our culture, and I think women have to take some responsibility for this.  

 

Ashley Judd started the anatomical references with her initial tweet...

 

If a woman thinks she's won some sort of gender victory because she gets down in the gutter and plays/talks dirty with the boys who behave that way, then she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place. 

You can't threaten people, even in the gutter.

[Garga]

There has been a coarsening of our culture, and I think women have to take some responsibility for this.  

 

Ashley Judd started the anatomical references with her initial tweet...

 

If a woman thinks she's won some sort of gender victory because she gets down in the gutter and plays/talks dirty with the boys who behave that way, then she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place. 

 

 

Do you really, honestly, absolutely believe that her "coarse" tweet was anywhere near comparable to the tweets that came back at her?  Really?  Honestly?  You don't see a difference?  You are ok with someone making a somewhat coarse response being told they deserve to be violently raped and murdered?  

 

What if Ashley was your daughter and in a moment of silliness used a *gasp* bad word in a tweet?  Would it be ok for men to send her dozens and dozens of tweets that they were going to violently rape her?  You'd be ok with that?  

 

The response from the other tweeters was criminal.  Literally criminal.  

[Laurie]

Do you really, honestly, absolutely believe that her "coarse" tweet was anywhere near comparable to the tweets that came back at her?  Really?  Honestly?  You don't see a difference?  You are ok with someone making a somewhat coarse response being told they deserve to be violently raped and murdered?  

 

What if Ashley was your daughter and in a moment of silliness used a *gasp* bad word in a tweet?  Would it be ok for men to send her dozens and dozens of tweets that they were going to violently rape her?  You'd be ok with that?  

 

The response from the other tweeters was criminal.  Literally criminal.  

 

Of course it wasn't comparable.  And why would you even think that I'm ok with the responses that she got? 

 

I'll say it again.  Our society is becoming very coarse.  It's really a shame that we need incidents like this to prove it. 

 

 

[albeto.]

I believe those guys thought they were posting anonymously on their social media accounts.  They were tracked down anyway. 

 

Interesting. 

 

We as a society have to stand up and say "no, this is not acceptable behavior, and there will be repercussions".  We cannot say nothing because maybe it will get worse if we stand up to them. 

 

I don't mean to suggest doing nothing (so I agree with you), just that while we do [whatever], others do [something else] in reply. Tracking down people to hold them accountable for crimes inspires criminals to hide better. It's always been like that. 

 

I think the idea of holding online social media induced harassment to criminal standards is one of the many glitches we as a society will be ironing out in the next decade or two, especially as anonymity becomes more valuable and desirable (not just because of this, but because of NSA, identity theft, hacking, and other unrelated reasons). 

[Guest]

Of course it wasn't comparable.  And why would you even think that I'm ok with the responses that she got? 

 

I'll say it again.  Our society is becoming very coarse.  It's really a shame that we need incidents like this to prove it. 

I don't understand this post.

 

A woman has an opinion.  She expresses her opinion.  She receives multiple threats of sexual and physical violence. 

 

The coarsening of the culture is a different topic.  I don't see how the two are related.

[Garga]

I'll take my  way of living any day:  Act like a lady...including the way you talk (and tweet).   Only date men who treat you like a lady.  Marry a gentleman, then raise your sons to be gentlemen and your daughters to be ladies. 

 

Live carefully and let the rest of the world burn?  No, that's not good enough. You can't just say, "Well, only bad people who do bad things are affected.  I'm good and careful, so I won't be affected."  That's just not true.  

 

When we see how woman, all women, who say things that men don't like on the internet get threatened with vile threats, we can't just say, "Oh, I'm not like *those* women!" and ignore it.  Instead we ought to call out the people who post threats and express appropriate outrage.  

 

You say there's a coarsening and women are responsible for it, but when women say, "Hey!  This is coarse!  We've gotta stop this!" you don't agree?  Why shouldn't we fight against this coarsening?  There are levels to it.  There is good-natured bantering (Judd's post) and then there is vicious filth (what came back at her.)  We should certainly fight against that coarseness and not throw up our hands and say, "Oh well!  That's the culture we've let happen. Too late to fix it now."

 

Would you have been ok with Judd's post if she'd said kiss my grits or butt instead of ass?  Is that single word what makes her deserving of the rancor she got back?

[albeto.]

Of course it wasn't comparable.  And why would you even think that I'm ok with the responses that she got? 

 

I don't mean to pile on either, but this is a fair question. In the spirit of explaining for clarity, I'll share why I too came to this conclusion. 

 

I'll take my  way of living any day:  Act like a lady...including the way you talk (and tweet).   Only date men who treat you like a lady.  Marry a gentleman, then raise your sons to be gentlemen and your daughters to be ladies. 

 

I interpret this to mean she was asking for it, ie, by acting like a crass jackass, she was treated like a crass jackass. 

 

If a woman thinks she's won some sort of gender victory because she gets down in the gutter and plays/talks dirty with the boys who behave that way, then she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place. 

 

Again, albeit more articulate than saying "she's acting like a crass jackass." 

 

I don't excuse the foul-mouthed creeps who sent tweets back to her...not at all!   But I have to say that her initial tweet wasn't exactly ladylike.

 

See, I interpret your above comments to do just that - excuse the foul-mouth creeps who sent tweets back to her. You excuse them by saying she stepped into the gutter, she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place. So my impression, my personal opinion here, is that you're deceiving yourself when you say you're not excusing it. I think, and again this is my personal opinion, you don't want to excuse this kind of thing in general, but in this particular event, you have no problem excusing it, which is why you share your reasons for excusing it. Please keep in mind I'm not trying to correct or shame you, just answer your question as I suspect I'm not the only one who is coming away with this opinion. 

 

I'll say it again.  Our society is becoming very coarse.  It's really a shame that we need incidents like this to prove it. 

 

Can you think of an era when our society hasn't been "very course"? What about those elements of society that are less "course" than yesteryear? Like for example, when I learned a black man who was missing for ten days in Mississippi had been found hanging from a tree, I gasped out loud. I never do that. It shocked me* to think we as a society might be moving "back" to this nostalgic yesteryear in which things looked very good on the surface (less "course"), but at the expense of those who dared ripple the tranquil waters. Because the waters were tranquil thanks to the blood sweat and tears of these people forced into silence and supplication, I don't think that's any less "course" than today, even if women do dare to smoke and drink and swear in public. 

 

 

*only time will tell if this was a suicide or homicide, it is potentially very concerning

[Guest]

I'll take my  way of living any day:  Act like a lady...including the way you talk (and tweet).   Only date men who treat you like a lady.  Marry a gentleman, then raise your sons to be gentlemen and your daughters to be ladies. 

Did you read the Curt Shilling article linked above?  All he did was congratulate his daughter being accepted onto a college sports team. 

 

This problem has zero to do with women being "ladylike".

[albeto.]

The coarsening of the culture is a different topic.  I don't see how the two are related.

 

It's the "she asked for it" defense. Rather than asking for it by wearing modern clothes, Judd asked for it by speaking with modern coarseness. 

[Laurie]

I don't understand this post.

 

A woman has an opinion.  She expresses her opinion.  She receives multiple threats of sexual and physical violence. 

 

The coarsening of the culture is a different topic.  I don't see how the two are related.

 

There are many ways to express an opinion.  She chose the coarse way.     

 

She didn't deserve the vile, threatening language that was thrown back at her.    People should really clean up their language, over the internet and in public places.  And I do think the decline of our culture is related...many people don't even seem to notice foul language...until it gets even more foul.   

 

 

 

 

[LucyStoner]

So kick me out of the sisterhood, but I think Ashley Judd is a flake with an inflated sense of her own intelligence and importance. Really--who cares what anonymous idiots on the internet threaten? Is she genuinely afraid that one of the Tweeting nitwits is going to make her suck his two-inch *&^%#? She is comparing Twitter comments to real threats experienced by real people in real life? This is not the first time she's said something silly, e.g., comparing the Rwandan genocide to certain coal mining practices. (I dare you to read her blog post that is linked in that article, the whole "my dog feels the pain of this environmental tragedy.") And also, she's a really bad actress.

She is a sexual assault survivor.

 

Trust me, threats that recall that are not harmless.

[Matryoshka]

I don't mean to suggest doing nothing (so I agree with you), just that while we do [whatever], others do [something else] in reply. Tracking down people to hold them accountable for crimes inspires criminals to hide better. It's always been like that.

 

But the thing is, these guys weren't 'criminals' - or they didn't think of themselves that way, nor would anyone who knew them.  They were both 'respectable' guys.  They were emboldened to say those things because of perceived anonymity, in this case via Twitter (as are the vast majority of misogynistic jerks who post this kind of harassment).  It's easy for them to just type random jerkfacedness and press enter.  I don't think the vast majority of these types of jerks are going to go out of their way to find new more anonymous ways of harassing people.  They're more like thoughtless jerks who think they can get away with it.  We have to tell them they can't.  The guys who harassed Curt Schilling's daughter have now lost their jobs.  Yay.  In one of the other cases, just telling the kids' moms was enough.  These are not for the most part hardened criminals or seasoned stalkers.  Let's nip it in the bud, and teach them proper manners.

 

And Schilling says, now these guys will have this pop up as the first thing someone sees when they're googled for the rest of their lives.  Yay.  Jerks beware.

 

I think some of these rich guys should set up some kind of charitable clearing house/foundation, where people who receive truly egregious online threats and harassment can go and submit the threats and the users' 'anonymous' handles, and then the foundation would use cyber forensics to track them down, and there could be free/low-cost legal help if there needed to be further action (if their moms smacking them weren't enough).  It's nice that the super-rich celebrities (who I'm sure get more than their share of this stuff) can fight back, how 'bout pooling some of those millions and helping the masses?  (or, y'know, law enforcement could just take this more seriously - but they have more limited budgets and time, I guess...)

 

I just saw on the news this morning that the CEO of Twitter has come out and said publicly that his company has done a shameful job (his words) of handling threats like this.  I think maybe the tide is turning?  What it takes is people standing up and saying 'this is wrong'.

[LucyStoner]

There has been a coarsening of our culture, and I think women have to take some responsibility for this.

 

Ashley Judd started the anatomical references with her initial tweet...

 

If a woman thinks she's won some sort of gender victory because she gets down in the gutter and plays/talks dirty with the boys who behave that way, then she shouldn't be surprised when she looks around and sees that the gutter isn't such a nice place.

Kiss my a@@ in reference to a sports team =/= rape threats.

 

I'll take my way of living any day: Act like a lady...including the way you talk (and tweet). Only date men who treat you like a lady. Marry a gentleman, then raise your sons to be gentlemen and your daughters to be ladies.

Equating a sports fan excitement with rape threats =/= ladylike in my book. The trouble with your metric is that it is highly subjective. There is nothing she could say or do that would make rape threats any less of a problem.

 

Do not think that being a lady protects women from sexual violence or harassment. I was a modest girl, devoutly religious and considering becoming a nun, who wore a ton of layers and I had a man trying to hire me to sleep with his son merely because I was waiting for the bus alone at age 15. I was sitting reading a schoolbook about gender and a man on a bus handed 16 year old me a violence porn/snuff type magazine. There is nothing that indemnifies one from this nonsense and it was cultivating an "unladylike" ability to be physically intimidating and loud as needed that protected me as a young adult.

[MrsMommy]

Maybe she should have just proved how ladylike she is by not being interested in sports at all. After all, isn't that "man stuff?"

 

Please.

 

Instead of accusing her of not being a lady for saying ass (oh the horrors!), and suggesting she got what she deserved for stooping to gutter levels, maybe we should be horrified about all of the jackASSES harassing her who are not being gentlemanly and are engaging in criminal behavior.

 

I don't care what kind of language she used (and in this case, it was tame, and in keeping with the kind of banter that tends to accompany sports)...no one deserves to be talked to that way. Ever.

[MrsBasil]

LucyStoner, I was liking your points, not your experiences on your previous post.

[Laurie]

 

 

Do not think that being a lady protects women from sexual violence or harassment.

 

 I don't. 

 

I'm so sorry about those horrible things that happened to you.  The difference, though, is that you were minding your own business.  And what happened to you is so much worse than what happened to Ashley Judd.  

 

She sent out a tweet that could only provoke a certain response from certain kinds people.  She certainly wasn't trying to invite a high level of discourse given what she wrote.  And as a celebrity I would think that by now she should be aware of all the creeps and crazies out there...and that Twitter has to be one of the easiest places for people like that to infest.