A question about museum exhibits...

[blondeviolin]

A museum you paid to visit has a child-sized chess board. Your child wants to play with the pieces. Do you allow him to if there is a game obviously in progress?

[poppy]

If the players are present, of course not.

If the players are not, yes.

[hillfarm]

No, however I might check with the staff member responsible for the area to see if there is a limit on how long the matches may go, and if we could sign up to have a few minutes with the pieces after this match and before the next one began. If there were other players waiting or scheduled, I would make my dc's time very brief. If no one was scheduled or waiting, he could play to his heart's content as long as none of the pieces left the board. As soon as two players came and wanted to start a match, my dc's playtime would be over.

[momto10blessings]

If the players are present, of course not.

If the players are not, yes.

What she said

[blondeviolin]

Players are present and actually on the board.

[regentrude]

Players are present and actually on the board.

 

Well, then your kid has to wait until they are done.

[QueenCat]

Well, then your kid has to wait until they are done.

 

This.................

[SJ.]

Well, then your kid has to wait until they are done.

 

^Yep.^

[Mrs Mungo]

If the players are present, of course not.

If the players are not, yes.

Agreed.

[Berta]

If the players are present, of course not.

If the players are not, yes.

 

I totally agree with this ^^^^^^

[*Lulu*]

If the players are present, of course not.

If the players are not, yes.

This just seems like common sense and basic curtesy.

 

 

So.....

 

What vital piece of info are we missing? I'm guessing it must be good if you came to post this question.

[Chris in VA]

Probably that her child was in the middle of the game and another child came in to disrupt....

 

Rude.

[*Lulu*]

Probably that her child was in the middle of the game and another child came in to disrupt....

 

Rude.

You never can tell.

 

Threads about cupcakes and crazy stroller wielding mothers have started off so innocently.......

[blondeviolin]

You never can tell.

 

Threads about cupcakes and crazy stroller wielding mothers have started off so innocently.......

I know, right?!

 

Actually, my older two were the ones playing. The astonishing thing was that only 1 out of 6 parents today stopped their child from moving pieces around.

 

One girl (about 3) came and began moving pieces. When my son saw, he kindly asked her to leave the pieces there, but she could move his pieces for him on his turn. I thought that was a good way to deal with it.

 

Most horrifying was the two 4/5 year-old kids came around and completely destroyed their game. The first time my kids asked them to leave the pieces there and the kids still tore board apart. Their mom said that they had paid admission too and they could play with the pieces as well. When they left, my kids were visibly upset and had to begin their game again.

[poppy]

I've been to I don't know how many kids and science museums. The etiquette is simple, clear and universal. Find an empty station and wait your turn.

 

 

I *will* say that I never let my kids monopolize a very popular spot for long. Not more than, say, 20 minutes. If other kids kept looping back to the chess set while one set of kids played for a very long time - I could see that being a little annoying. (But not enough to trample over the kids or ruin what they were doing!)

[Moxie]

Wait, were your kids sitting in chairs looking at the game board?? Was this a life-size game?

[Plink]

Hmm... I might be changing my opinion.

 

A life size game seems to have different social rules than a table top chess board. There is something inexplicably more group-ish about those big sets. I've never seen anyone try to play a complete game on the one at our local museum. Usually a couple of kids make a few moves and wander off, then the little kids push all the pieces into a corner and jump on the squares, then another group will lie the pieces on their sides and create a fort. Not your typical chess game.

[Joker]

I would not let my own play an actual chess game with those life size pieces at a museum unless it was an empty museum. Play a few moves against each other? Sure! An actual full game? Nope. I wouldn't see that as fair to the other people who were there.

 

I also wouldn't let my dds mess up someone who was playing, though. I would be irritated someone was monopolizing the game though.

[Farrar]

While I agree that the kids probably should have stood back, if it was a life size game, I wouldn't have put my kids in the position of having to defend a game and actually play with the pieces.  It's too attractive a nuisance and too large a space to try and manage it.  Especially in a children's museum where little kids just don't know any better and are coming past these things...

[Cosmos]

While I agree that the kids probably should have stood back, if it was a life size game, I wouldn't have put my kids in the position of having to defend a game and actually play with the pieces.  It's too attractive a nuisance and too large a space to try and manage it.  Especially in a children's museum where little kids just don't know any better and are coming past these things...

 

A life-size game board does seem like it might have some different etiquette rules.

 

I remember one time being at a children's museum where they had some sort of large building blocks made of foam. There was a mom there with two young kids, and I was there with my son who was about four. I can't even remember now who was playing with them first, but there was this very confusing minute where the mom of the current player was urging her child to share while the other mom was enforcing the "wait your turn" rule. We both laughed when we realized what we were doing and had a nice chat. It was hard to know what the etiquette was. Some things should be shared, some things are "wait your turn", and it's not always entirely clear which is which. We had quick mom talk and decided that we would go with sharing, and the kids had great fun. But as other families wandered in and their kids gravitated toward these cool foam blocks, we could see the same confusion play out several times.

 

I've been in other situations where people had clearly different ideas about etiquette but a clear, frank conversation like above wasn't possible or fruitful.

[Melissa in Australia]

I have only ever seen one life size chess set. I was a child of around 12. it was  two grown men using it to play a game. It looked very intense. no kid at all would have dared to play with any of the pieces, including the ones that had been take and lined up on the side of the board.

 

I would have thought the pieces were for playing a game of chess and that the other mothers who refused to discipline their children for interfering with the game were pretty selfish

[blondeviolin]

I had no intention of letting them play a full game, especially since they are beginners and usually end up in stalemate anyway. They couldn't even get more than two pawns moved, though. It was somewhat busy today, but I would have thought they could have take a couple turns before we moved on.

 

My son left crying and muttering about how kids should take turns like everyone else. I was appalled to be honest. I tried to spin it into a teaching moment about taking turns and making sure we're not jumping in front of people just because we want to see something cool, but I think all he took away from it was that other kids don't have the same rules. Lol

[maize]

There is a set like that at our children's museum, my kids like to play though I doubt they have ever had time to finish a game. If someone else were playing a game they would know not to interfere, and while young children do sometimes wander onto the board when a game is in progress I have never seen a situation where the parent did not try to redirect them away from the game. I do think a game in progress should not be interrupted, and the are lots and lots of other things for the kids to do. That said, I would think it rude for one group to monopolize the game for more than thirty minutes or so if there are other people who want to use the set.

[momto10blessings]

Players are present and actually on the board.

No way then

[MomatHWTK]

It might be wise to discuss the idea of shared spaces/toys with your DS.  I don't think that my kids would expect to not have multiple children attracted to and want to touch giant chess pieces.  Only one of them might actually think he would be able to play the game without interference and he is not NT. 

[KungFuPanda]

I think I'd be annoyed if I paid museum admission and my kids spent the day playing a board game we have at home. Add to that monopolizing an exhibit when other kids clearly want a turn and I'd be doubly annoyed.

[theYoungerMrsWarde]

I had no intention of letting them play a full game, especially since they are beginners and usually end up in stalemate anyway. They couldn't even get more than two pawns moved, though. It was somewhat busy today, but I would have thought they could have take a couple turns before we moved on.

 

My son left crying and muttering about how kids should take turns like everyone else. I was appalled to be honest. I tried to spin it into a teaching moment about taking turns and making sure we're not jumping in front of people just because we want to see something cool, but I think all he took away from it was that other kids don't have the same rules. Lol

My kids learned this tonight at the McDonald's play place. I've never pointed out the rules (on a big, colorful, easy to read sign) but my kids noticed and commented to me when other kids were blatantly not following the rules and no one was correcting them. They're 7 and 4.5, so they tried to tell the other kids the rules, but no one listened to them. As my 4 year old put it: "That boy does not know the SAFETY RULES!" They couldn't understand why these other children were not following the printed rules. I don't think I explained well. :(

[jelbe5]

Most horrifying was the two 4/5 year-old kids came around and completely destroyed their game. The first time my kids asked them to leave the pieces there and the kids still tore board apart. Their mom said that they had paid admission too and they could play with the pieces as well. When they left, my kids were visibly upset and had to begin their game again.

Wow. What a teaching moment. How sad to have to learn some children are rude because their parents are even ruder.

 

I would be upset, too, if I was confronted with that. It would be different if if the game was being monopolized by two people for a long time, but that does not seem to be the case based on what you are saying.

 

Perhaps the museum has a way to make suggestions? I would encourage you to ask they come up with some simple rules/etiquette tips and post them by the chess set.

[Melissa in Australia]

I think I'd be annoyed if I paid museum admission and my kids spent the day playing a board game we have at home. Add to that monopolizing an exhibit when other kids clearly want a turn and I'd be doubly annoyed.

 

but the OP said they only wanted to have a few chess moves, not play a whole game

[Ausmumof3]

I think it's a bit grey based on the fact it was life sized. It would be unfair to expect to play a whole game and if you can't play to the end anyway, it wouldn't matter so much if a few pieces got moved. The interest of a life sized board would be the pieces more than the strategy of the game to my mind. That said if someone else is using a display of any kind I'd encourage my kids to wait their turn nicely.

[poppy]

Large scale exhibits do tend to be 'multiple kids at a time'. Our kids museum has a big screen which captures kid images and puts them in a loop , so you can watch multiple versions of yourself. I have never once seen one kid or one set of siblings get to use it privately - it's a group endeavor. If a mother acted like I was being rude for letting my kids play while her kids were using it, I'd definitely not think I was the one breaking etiquette.

 

I'd not use it as a 'some other kids are rude' moment so much as a 'shared exhibits can be tricky, what else could we have all done to have a good experience'.

 

I'll be honest, when I first answered , I thought 'child sized chess pieces' meant SMALL ones.

 

But I am sorry you had a bad experience and obviously the 'well we paid too' mom is setting a terrible example for her kids. ugh.

[KungFuPanda]

but the OP said they only wanted to have a few chess moves, not play a whole game

Right, but it seems like an exercise in futility. There were six interruptions during that time. Either the moves were taking a while, or the space was too busy to pull this off. It can't be fun for the boys playing to try and guard a large area while trying to play a game. If one parent/child interrupts, then you can consider that they might be rude. However, five children running onto the board tells me this board was too large and too public to expect the other children to stay away. The OP seems to think that she's dealing with five I'll-mannered children and five clueless parents. 10 rude people in the span of a few minutes? It just seems more likely that the expectations were too great in this situation.

[ssavings]

Well, the "we paid, too" sounds rude to me. I'm sorry she said that to your children. :(

On the other hand, I think it would surprise/frustrate me if we were expected to wait for each preceding child to be done at every exhibit at our local children's museum. Granted, etiquette varies by location and tradition in that area, etc. But, at least in the children's museum by us, the exhibits are designed to accommodate large groups of children at one time, and it would be impractical to apply a "one-at-a-time" rule. There are too many children, and not enough exhibits to accommodate them each individually/as a sibling group, particularly because the exhibits are very large-scale. 

[happi duck]

I too was picturing a small chess set at first.

 

With a large set I'm not sure it would be obvious that a game was in progress. If the player was thinking about a move it would look like no one was doing anything.

[Guest submarines]

If it was crowded with many toddlers and preschoolers around I'd discourage my children from playing even a couple of moves with all of the pieces. Or rather, I might encourage them to try, but to move on if it simply wasn't happening.

 

Museums design these kind of life size sets for either multi player cooperation (older children / groups) or for free exploration by younger children. It is not designed for two players to monopolize the exhibit for more than a couple of minutes.

 

 

 

[Guest submarines]

A museum you paid to visit has a child-sized chess board. Your child wants to play with the pieces. Do you allow him to if there is a game obviously in progress?

 

I wouldn't allow my child to interfere with an existing game. But if the players stayed on the board for more than 5 minutes, and were trying to play a real game of chess rather than experimenting with a couple of moves, I'd think they were rude for monopolizing the exhibit and not letting others use the space.

[Melinda in VT]

My experience with chess boards like these was in Switzerland, where they were common in the parks. The players were grown men, and you can bet they were playing an entire game. They usually had a crowd of spectators.

 

To be honest, it seems an odd choice for a museum display. The people who design these museums do observe how children move through exhibits, yes?

 

I think it's completely understandable that your kids were frustrated. If my kids had tried to interrupt your kids, I would have stopped them, including removing them from the area if they wouldn't leave the pieces alone.

[Moxie]

My experience with chess boards like these was in Switzerland, where they were common in the parks. The players were grown men, and you can bet they were playing an entire game. They usually had a crowd of spectators.

 

To be honest, it seems an odd choice for a museum display. The people who design these museums do observe how children move through exhibits, yes?

 

I think it's completely understandable that your kids were frustrated. If my kids had tried to interrupt your kids, I would have stopped them, including removing them from the area if they wouldn't leave the pieces alone.

It does seem like a silly choice. Our town built a fancy new library and put a giant 2-story boat in the middle of the children's section. It's crazy! The librarian spends most of her time hushing loud children or looking for parents who can't read the signs about unattended children. I wonder if anyone designing the kid's section actually had kids?!?

[poppy]

I was in a resort in Jamaica with a life size chess board - hidden the woods for couples to stumble across. It was pretty cool .

It does seem like a silly choice. Our town built a fancy new library and put a giant 2-story boat in the middle of the children's section. It's crazy! The librarian spends most of her time hushing loud children or looking for parents who can't read the signs about unattended children. I wonder if anyone designing the kid's section actually had kids?!?

Most modern kids libraries I've seen do not expect quiet . But I do think parents should be attentive , obviously.

[Moxie]

I was in a resort in Jamaica with a life size chess board - hidden the woods for couples to stumble across. It was pretty cool .

 

Most modern kids libraries I've seen do not expect quiet . But I do think parents should be attentive , obviously.

Beyond the noise issue, for quite some time, there was a liability concern so the second floor of the boat (with the wheel and telescope) was blocked off. It really is a silly thing.