"Leashes" for 2 year old twins?

[bobbeym]

They were life savers for DH and I, and the boys, when they were toddlers through about the age of 5. Both of them had to investigate *everything* no matter what we said, and it really isn't all that hard for littles to yank their hand out of Mom's and run off no matter how tightly you hold on. We used the harnass type ones when they were toddlers, then switched to the velcro-style wrist bands once they were old enough to understand it was still needed for their safety and weren't going to take it off. Now as teens, we use the cell-phone style leash for them so they can't run off. :leaving:

[AndyJoy]

One of my earliest memories (28 mo.) is of wearing my leash at Disneyland (pre-cute animal backpack). This is a happy memory. You know why? Because I wasn't stuck with my arm way above my head holding an adult's hand or strapped into a boring stroller. I got to EXPLORE within a safe radius. The best part was when we posed for a photo of Pluto holding my leash. I thought this was HILARIOUS and kept repeating, "The doggie is holding my leash!" My first memory of a joke involved that handy little butter-yellow strapping and buckle assembly.

 

I planned to use the monkey backpack with DS, but we went places where it was needed so infrequently that he balked when I tried to use it (18 mo. or so?). With only one child, I decided the massive meltdown wasn't worth it at that point and went with some other option instead. Had it been an major outing, I would have powered through and insisted. He was a crazy-fast runner and had no concept of "too far from Mommy." Even if he was out of my sight, he didn't care or get scared. If I had TWO kids who could head in opposite directions I would definitely use them.

[AndyJoy]

Once at an airport I saw 4 kids aged approximately 2, 4, 7, & 9 all wearing leashes. I thought this was a bit odd, but then I realized that at least the 9-year-old had special needs and the adult was their non-custodial grandmother who looked VERY overwhelmed. I certainly didn't judge her for wanting to keep them safe as I had no idea what the situation was!

[BakersDozen]

My only concern with leashes/harnesses is when parents allow the child(ren) to still dash around to the extent the leash will allow. I believe I've posted this before but I witnessed an elderly gentleman trip over a leash and it was not pretty. I only used a leash when my oldest was 13mo (had newborn boy as well, no double stroller, no infant wrap/carrier). I made sure to keep the strap very close to me so dd was literally walking right by my leg. If I used leashes again, especially with twins, I'd have them still walking right by my side so as not to dash in front of other people. For me, leashes/harnesses are a training device just as much as a safety device; my goal is for my dc to walk with me, holding onto my shirt/pants, not dashing away, and leashes can be a valuable tool toward that goal. :)

[AndyJoy]

Maybe I should start a T-shirt line for moms of leashed children:

 

I love my kids too much to lose them!

 

Yes, I know he's not a dog.

 

Fighting childhood obesity, one leash at a time. (with a crossed circle over a stroller)

 

I'll stop leashing when 'dog moms' give up sweaters.

[Matryoshka]

Let me address the logistics of twins and leashes specifically.

 

I bought leashes for my twins in an attempt to give them more freedom when out and about once they learned to walk, but ended up almost never using them because... sometimes one would run in one direction, and one in the other, and I'd be standing in the middle with both my arms extended, unable to run after either of them and prevent whatever mischief they were doing at the end of that there leash without hauling the second onto her bum and dragging her. 'Cause you know, unlike dogs when they do things like that, you can't yank on the leash and make them "heel"... :lol:

 

Two more practical ideas: wear one in a sling, and leash the second. Or, maybe they have invented a twin leash, which would be a single leash with a forked end, so they can't run in two different directions. But two leashes on two toddlers = chaos.

 

Having had twin toddlers myself, I have no judgement on any method one finds useful to keep them from trying to do themselves in or otherwise wreak havoc. There is only so much one can do when one is outnumbered.

[SKL]

My kids were awful for walking in front of other people. There may have been people who thought they should be leashed. ;) It wasn't for lack of trying to teach them, I promise.

[Runningmom80]

Maybe I can find a way to connect them so they fork off. Thanks for that insight!

[mellifera33]

I used a backpack harness with my oldest all the time, and only had positive comments, and frazzled moms asking me where they could buy one! Most of the time he held my hand in addition to wearing the harness, but for those spontaneous sprint moments the harness was invaluable.

[gardenmom5]

50 years ago, my mother used a leash for my brother. she got rude looks then. so, yes, I would expect she will get rude looks and rude comments. (I would also expect she'll have some asking where she found the leash) however, she's the mom and she should do what she feels is best and not give any credence to what someone else thinks about how she should rear her children. she's rearing them, not anybody else. some kids will stay with you, other's can disappear faster than you can turn around.

 

besides, ignoring them will be really good practice for the future becasue strangers (and even family) so often love to comment on what we are doing wrong in their eyes to rear our children.

[Matryoshka]

Here's a twin harness: http://www.tommiguard.com/multi.htm

 

Yes, that's the kind you need for twins. I got these really cute backpack harnesses with cute little animals on them, in which you could stash the leash when not in use. I think I was a bit worried about judgement from others and thought they were stealthier. :tongue_smilie: I did end up using them sometimes when both dh and I were out (I think most often on a family trip to CA when they were two, and we were out visiting public spaces). Alone they didn't work, though. I can't remember if I just didn't see the twin-style harnesses, or whether I just didn't want to spend any more on harnesses. I used my sling way more.

 

With my 3rd (singleton) I had a rebozo sling which could double as a harness - just tied it around her waist and held the other end. :D

[celticmom]

I used a leash on dd when she was younger and she liked it because she had more freedom when she was on the leash. I also placed names and contact information in the backpack just in case. We go to a large SCA event every year and this is where the leash was used the most. It was also used in the Walmart parking lot. I even used the harness part on the playground. When dd wanted to climb something that was in my opinion too tall for her I would hold onto the harness just in case she slipped.(Trying to hold onto her resulterd in a meltdown but If I held the harness she would begrudgingly tolerate it.)

[AdventureMoms]

Maybe I can find a way to connect them so they fork off. Thanks for that insight!

 

I knot them together in the middle

[Susan in TN]

I used to scoff at them, but now that I've had to cart a 2yo and 4yo through a busy airport, I sure don't scoff any more. 2yo twins - I'd probably never leave home without a harness of some kind :) . She'll get looks from the clueless, but who cares.

[vonfirmath]

 

 

I know some people use these and love them, but I despise them. They're kids, not dogs. Hold their hands, carry them, or stick them in a stroller. Though I've done a good job of restraining myself in recent years, I have been known to give looks of disgust to people who use these things, and when I was dealing with infertility I did make a comment or two. FWIW, I never had twins, but my kids are 13 months apart, and the oldest is a very active boy. I used a double-stroller, or held his hand while DD was in a sling/backpack. I never felt the need to leash them. That being said, they're becoming more and more common so she's unlikely to get as many dirty looks now as she would have 7-10 years ago. Parents are judged by society no matter what they do, so someone at some point is going to give her a dirty look in public when she's with her kids whether she leashes them or not.

 

 

1. I'm not a good enough mommy to ALWAYS hold hands, nor am I strong enough to carry a child who is squirming to get down. Nor am I hard hearted enough to let a child cry and cry who does NOT want to be in the stroller/cart any longer but up on the legs God gave her.

 

When there is a perfectly good tool to allow her to walk safely. I'm going to use it.

[HRAAB]

I never used them with my twins. However, I think I would have a few more years of life left in me if I had. We didn't call them A & B Demolition for nothing. At this point, I could care less about looks and comments. Safety and sanity are more important.

[alef]

I've always figured that leashes give kids more freedom than hand-holding or being strapped into a stroller does. Honestly, with twins especially I think most people would understand it is a useful way to keep the kids close by and safe.

[hillfarm]

"They aren't dogs." That's right, and they're not dead, injured or lost either.

 

Such comments show a lack of comprehension and experience regarding working with multiple toddlers in crowded or unsafe conditions. Not to mention a lack of compassion and failure to realize that just because you have parented a few children does not make you an expert regarding all children.

 

That said, it is important to recognize that a leash is not an excuse not to train a child in proper public behavior. It is a fall back security device to prevent crisis situations from developing. It is something to fill the gap between safety and the more limited safety consciousness of a young child and should function more as a backup system than a primary control device. Because a leash can fail and harm could come if a child or parent had become overconfident and overly dependent.

 

Regarding the t-shirt ideas, I'm torn between one with a picture of a big nose and the saying, "I found your nose. It was in my business" and "My toddler is not: running rampant, being abducted, jumping in front of cars, tripping senior citizens, hiding under clothes racks, setting off door alarms, annoying other shoppers, climbing on counters....My toddler is not a dog - but my toddler IS safe."

[Giraffe]

If I'd had another child it would have had one of those backpack leashes. Airports are scary places with little ones, especially international airports where you don't speak the language! One kid I could keep up with. Two, not so much!

[JessReplanted]

Maybe I should start a T-shirt line for moms of leashed children:

 

I love my kids too much to lose them!

 

Yes, I know he's not a dog.

 

Fighting childhood obesity, one leash at a time. (with a crossed circle over a stroller)

 

I'll stop leashing when 'dog moms' give up sweaters.

 

 

 

Ha!! Love this!

[Dmmetler]

I had one when my DD was 2 or so. She wasn't a bolter (in fact, the opposite-it often seemed like she would have climbed back in my womb out in public if she could have gotten away with it) but she has sensory issues and really, really didn't like having her hand held, and the weight and tightness of the chest harness on the backpack helped reassure her in public. It was actually an OT that suggested it.

[J-rap]

Maybe, but who cares! :) A safe toddler definitely takes priority over rude stares.

[beaners]

I wish I had them when my twins were little! We might have been able to go places. :( I actually had a hand me down one from my sister, but it was one of the ones that velcroed around their wrists. I tried using it once or twice w/ ds, but he just ripped it right off.

 

You probably don't need this idea now ;), but those also fasten nicely around the back of a pair of overalls.

[Paige]

I bought leashes for my twins but never used them. They were not runners and I was in more danger of them causing me to fall because they were completely wrapped around my legs and wouldn't ever let go. They were crazy shy.

 

Had they been runners or wanderers or not terrified of not being in constant contact with me, I'd have used them. You'll probably get rude stares, but what else is new? You probably get rude stares all the time with twins anyway! They would be giving you dirtier looks if your twins were running wild. :closedeyes:

[JFSinIL]

Only from folks who don't have to chase two toddlers apt to run in opposite directions ;-)

 

I used harness/leashes for my twins. Otherwise they'd never have been allowed out of the stroller!

 

Oh, and if anyone says "They aren't dogs" a good retort would be "Yes - it would be tragic is one of them got hit by a car or lost. A dog can be replaced."

[mommyx4]

To be honest, I don't see a difference in that and a stroller. You are trying to keep your babies safe and by you. At least with the leash they can walk and get some exercise. I have twins as well and while I didn't have leashes, they were ALWAYS in a stroller if I was by myself and needed them contained. If someone glares at you, that's on them, not you. I say go for it!

[Unicorn.]

You probably don't need this idea now ;), but those also fasten nicely around the back of a pair of overalls.

 

 

Oh, I don't know. Now that he's looking at colleges and learning to drive... I'm thinking a leash isn't a bad idea! :lol"

 

Yes, I did do the overall thing- but he didn't wear that many overalls. I think he owned one pair!

 

 

As to the poster who said they aren't dogs. No, they are my children and I will do whatever I have to, to protect them. I had 2 runners, one of them being the older (by a whole year) brother. Dd2 was a Houdini by the time she was 1. A stroller couldn't hold that child. Most car seats couldn't hold that child. Ever see the movie "Please don't eat the Daisies" with Doris Day? The two year old they kept locked in the cage, because he could pick locks.... yep, that was my dd. She had so many close calls because of her escape abilities it isn't even funny. So yes, if I could have afforded to buy cute little backpack leashes, I would have. In a freaking heartbeat!

[El...]

Shoot, if I had to go anywhere busy with 2 yo twins, I'd do whatever I had to do! I don't like the idea of a leash as a standard parenting tool, and sometimes I see people who seem to be holding on to the leash instead of interacting with their kid, but I'm not going to do anything but smile at someone using them in a busy place with busy kids. I assume you have a good double stroller, etc.

[hollyh]

I suspect you will get more "looks like you've got your hands full" comments than rude stares. :)

[Eagle]

I got one that was a backpack with a short leash attached. It was still a leash but didn't look like it at first glance. I got quite a few positive comments from people about how useful it looked. As an added bonus it could also hold something small for ds (toy, little book, hand wipes).

[Kipling]

I have used one for my youngest. To get her excited about it, we wrapped it up as a present, and she was thrilled about her lion backpack. We use it at theme parks, mostly, and all I have ever gotten were compliments. I was surprised by the number of people (especially older people) who said they'd rather see a child on a leash than getting her arm yanked out of her socket or running away from mom. To the OP, I say use the leashes and ignore any negative comments. You are doing it to keep your kids safe, and that it more important than others' opinions.

[texasmama]

It would not bother me a bit to see two year old twins on leashes.