Infants and pierced ears

[jujsky]

I was afraid DD would hurt herself is she had them done as a baby. They could fall out and she could swallow one and choke. They could get caught on something and rip her ear. Another baby/child could see the sparkly things in her ears and rip them out (my toddler brother did that to me when I had mine done at 5 and my ear never healed properly). There were too many what-ifs for me. We had DD's done this summer when she was 5 and for us it was the right time. I do think babies with pierced ears look adorable though.

 

Edited to add: We didn't choose 5 just because I had them done at 5. DH and I made the decision when she was 3 or 4 that we would have them done when she asked. I know some people want their kids to be older and I didn't know how DH felt about it. She asked late winter/early spring of last year, but we made her wait until after the summer dance recital. They can't wear jewelery at the recital or dress rehearsals, and I was afraid that I would forget to put her earrings back in with all the running around & they'd heal back up.

Edited February 7, 2011 by jujsky

[journeytolily]

My oldest DD (9) had her ears pierced in Guatemala by her foster mother, who did ask permission. So they were already done when we picked her up at 5 months of age. In Latin cultures, it's pretty much expected. In fact, I had always planned on having my daughters' ears pierced in the hospital (I am from Miami, and this was done at laest years ago), even though I am not Hispanic.

 

My youngest daughter is African-American, and I took her to have her ears pierced at 2 months. I have heard that piercing baby's ears is also a cultural thing among AAs.

 

Both of them have had no problems whatsoever. My 9 yr old LOVES having earrings. Would definitely do it over again.

 

Veronica

[RanchGirl]

I voted that I haven't (because I have no girls) but that I would do it in the future. However, if I could I would change my vote after reading skadi's reply. And honestly my dh is against it and recently made a derogatory remark about a friend who had pierced his dd's ears, but I think that was more this guy's whole approach to parenting and responsibility in general and the ear piercing was just a small example of that.

 

So ignore my vote please!

[Chris in VA]

From my experience, people who are following traditional Hispanic culture routinely pierce infants' ears.

 

This has been my experience, living in Miami and Texas.

 

There are so few things kids "wait for" nowadays, I want my dd to have the fun of looking forward to some sort of rite of passage, so we said piercing ears would be a good way to celebrate her 16th B-day, if she wants to. If she doesn't, I'm sure we'll come up with something else! Or she will.

 

BTW, is this an appropriate smilie for the thread? :bigear: LOL

[Brenda in FL]

My plan was to have my infant girl's ears pierced IF she was always mistaken as a baby boy. She never was - so I never got her ears pierced as a baby.

 

She ended up getting them pierced at age 6.

[TinaBlue]

I personally don't like seeing babies with pierced ears. I can't imagine causing a baby girl pain just so she'll be "cuter."

 

I got my ears pierced around age 9, when I knew what it entailed and was old enough to care for them. I wore earrings a lot for a few years and then stopped.

 

With DD (and any future daughters), I'll wait until she's old enough to take care of them and really wants to have it done.

[HRAAB]

No, not when they're babies. My girls were between 10 and 13 depending on the individual. It was more of a rite of passage, and we made a day out of it: shopping, lunch, ear piercing - just the two of us. Very special.

 

Also, I let them bring it up. It's not something I would ever push on someone else. My 10 yr old twins have never even mentioned it.

[dangermom]

I don't like babies to have pierced ears, but I may be slightly warped by my mom's opinion that piercings in general are barbaric and baby piercings the worst of all.

 

I'm glad I didn't get it done with my kids; my 10yo got her ears done this year and they took forever to heal. They are easily inflamed.

[Crimson Wife]

TBH, I've always thought of the practice as an "ethnic" thing. I can't think of any white babies of my acquaintance who have pierced ears but a number of Latina, African-American, and South Asian babies.

[Cera]

In our family you can get your ears pierced once you are in first grade.

[Peela]

No, I didn't and wouldn't do it- I prefer to make a rite of passage out of it when they are older. As in "for your ........" b'day you can get it done. I think for dd it was around age 9. I wanted her to be old enough to look after them herself.

However, its really not something I think is a big deal and it doesn't bother me that others get it done whenever.

I noticed that many Indians and some other foreigners seem to get it done for their baby girls so I guess it is a cultural thing for some people.

[misidawnrn]

I had my 7yo ears pierced when she was 4 months old. We will let 2yodd choose to pierce her ears if she wants when she is old enough to take care of them...maybe like 10-12??? I had my ears done when I was 3-4. I remember asking...begging...my mom forever before she did it. Ice cube and sewing needle!

[sewingmama]

I had my 7yo ears pierced when she was 4 months old. We will let 2yodd choose to pierce her ears if she wants when she is old enough to take care of them...maybe like 10-12??? I had my ears done when I was 3-4. I remember asking...begging...my mom forever before she did it. Ice cube and sewing needle!

 

Oh harsh LOL.

 

My DD is 4 and she does not have pierced ears. I don't do anything permanent to my children unless medically necessary. It isn't that I'm against it at all - my DD can get it done if she wants to later on -but I want her to make the decision herself. My DH is totally opposed though - he wants her to wait till she is 16. I will probably have a "discussion" with him if she wants it done sooner LOL.

 

I had mine done when I was 4. I'm allergic to most metals - though as a kid I didn't have problems. My baby sister bought me a pair of cheap earrings for Christmas when I was about 25 and I thought I'd wear them for a day to "be nice". They got horribly infected and closed up. So now I will wait till my DD gets hers done and I will get mine repierced at the same time (although I don't really mind not having them done).

 

For what it's worth I think baby earrings are cute -but I wouldn't do that to my own baby.

[v-girl]

I'm latina. My oldest got her ears pierced at 2 weeks old by a pediatric nurse from Honduras (my mom helped). We learned a valuable lesson. Infants don't like having their heads held still (but the nurse did numb her ear lobes). My second was taken to Claire's at 2 months old. I nursed her on one side and was ready to do the other when it was over. She didn't cry. I didn't feel wimpy for doing it the American way instead of the "old country" way for the second. Any more baby girls will be done the American way.

 

My sister had her pediatrician do my niece's ears. Her gun doesn't get used nearly as often as a jewelry store. The gun got stuck on the second ear. I cried when I found out (my American DH had asked her to use a jewelry store because they do it so often).

 

Anyway, there's my take. I don't care if anyone thinks it's cruel. The oldest didn't feel a thing (but she was pissed anyway), the younger didn't cry. :D

[Rhonda in TX]

I didn't pierce DD's ears as an infant and wouldn't if I had another girl, either. However, I have absolutely no problem with others who do pierce their baby's ears. Their child... their decision.

[LibraryLover]

My dds do not have pierced ears because we are all wimps. I love how cute it looks, however. I wish we had the guts.

[katemary63]

All three of my daughters begged to have their ears pierced at a very young age. I do have mine pierced (once) but actually almost never wear earrings. I guess the first daughter saw them on other people and the next daughters saw them on the first and wanted to be like her. I made the first two wait till they were 5, but seriously, it was their decision and they begged. Their dad took them. Daugher 3 demanded to have them done at age 3. Her older sisters had given her all the "kid" earrings they didn't want anymore and she was devasted that she couldn't wear them. All 5 of us accompanied her to "Claire's" (LOL!), but once in the chair she changed her mind so we all went home. A few months later - age 4 this time - she begged to try again, so we all traipsed down to the store again and this time, she went through with it. She winced, but was fine after that and so excited! (Everything she does is a family event!)

I agree that it should be the child's decision, but mine made that choice quite young. I never once suggested it or encouraged it but actually tried to talk them out of it.

[nmoira]

Just over a year ago, I response would have been an adamant "no!" However, after seeing a profession pierce my DD the Elder's ears with only the slightest discomfort, I've since softened my stance. While I wouldn't get an infant's ears done, I no longer have a problem with the concept, IFF a professional piercer is involved. Piercing guns... no way.

Edited February 8, 2011 by nmoira

[regentrude]

My child's body is her own. It is not for me to decide that there should be artificial holes.

She can decide that she wants holes when she is old enough (she did at age 12).

[DaffodilDreams]

To each his own, but I personally shudder when I see young ones with earrings. Not at all cute to me. Plus, I'm in the child should be old enough to make an informed decision camp.

[Pretty in Pink]

I don't have a daughter, but I wouldn't pierce an infants ears.

[Kalypso]

I would never pierce an infants ears. I have 4 dds. I first 2 dds had their ears pierced at 8 and 10 when they wanted it and were old enough to take care of their own ears. It will be the same for dds 6 and 2.

[ocelotmom]

Now I'm sitting here staring thoughtfully at the baby's earlobes. She'd look darn cute with earrings. We're in the "no unnecessary body mods on people who can't consent" camp, but I also understand the reasoning that doing it on a very young baby allows the parent total control over the caretaking, and the healing to finish before the kid is old enough to mess with it.

 

DD1 hasn't asked yet, but I suppose it's coming soon.

 

I once read someone mention ear piercing as a celebration of a first period. That feels right to me - something to look forward to (well, assuming it's something she wants), and a visible sign of her change in status, though it'll be up to her whether she wants to tell anyone the meaning or keep it private.

 

That also presumably will put it at a point where she'll be old enough to take care of it.

 

DS has asked to get his ears pierced (DH has them pierced, so he doesn't see it as a female thing). We explained that, while a lot of older teen boys and men have piercings, very few younger boys do, and it's likely to confuse people even more than they already are - he has long hair. Nowadays, I'd probably tell him he can do it when he can keep his hair properly brushed for a month straight.

[12Stars]

We had our three daughters ears pierced when they were infants. Yes it is part of our culture. Would we do it again, yes we would.

[celticmom]

My mother did not allow me to have pierced ears until I was at least 16 and I ended up waiting until I was in my 20s. I don't know if I will make my dd wait that long but she has not even asked yet and she is 6. I never wear earrings anymore(too lazy) so I am not sure they are on her radar yet. I am inclined to make her wait until at least her teens.

[Jennifer3141]

I think pierced ears on babies looks kind of trashy. Just my opinion, of course! But why on earth does a BABY need jewelry???

 

Add to that the belief that I'm just not down with cutting anything off or poking holes in any of my kids' parts. If they make that decision as adults (or at least wise teenagers), then fine. But body alterations should be their choices, IMO.

[Ravin]

My kids can't have their ears pierced, hair cut, or wear body art (temp tattoos, nail polish, etc.) until they wean. Which for DD was age 5; she decided to pierce her ears when she was about 5 1/2, but then one got infected so she didn't want to wear them any more and we let them close up. She's expressed interest in doing it again; I've told her that she has to pay for it herself next time, and that eliminated her interest, at least for now.

 

My DS will have the same boundaries.

[justamouse]

I had all of mine pierced and they love it. It's also cultural, too, Dh is Italian and MIL and SIL all came with us, we all had so much fun. I think they look beautiful.

 

Mine were pierced later and it was a nightmare. My mom refused for some stupid reason and then it hurt and she made this big huge deal out of it-it's not a big deal at all. Now all my girls love to get new earrings and their Nana loves to buy it for them!

 

When I was a baby I was given jewelry, and it was pretty wise. It's why you see India women with armloads of gold bracelets-that's their family wealth and I can tell you-at the price of gold now, I'm wishing I had bought more. When you start an inheritance as an infant, teach them respect and the value-it's a good lesson to learn.

Edited February 13, 2011 by justamouse

[Word Nerd]

Completely against it and think it looks silly. (But I feel the same way about baby headbands, etc.)

Edited February 13, 2011 by WordGirl