s/o Library etiquette.. RESTAURANT Etiquette

[Hedgehog]

We go out to eat occasionally, so here are a few observations:

 

At least TRY to encourage your kids to eat nicely, preferably sitting down. Other customers will probably dislike being shown the contents of your child's mouth.

 

Recently mopped floors are slippery. Best dresses do not look good with mop water streaks.

 

When at McDonalds, try to remember that their menu is limited. You cannot have chicken nuggets during breakfast time, neither can you have a bacon and egg muffin for tea. Getting aggressive about this is not effective.

 

 

I'll bet there are plenty others! :D

[fairfarmhand]

If your kids are sick....keep them home. I find myself wondering how far airborne germs can fly when someone at the next table has a kid barking like a seal.

[elegantlion]

Use your indoor voice, this is mainly for adults. We went out to eat a few weeks ago. The kids at the next table were fine, it was the Mom's voice that could be heard throughout the restaurant. She wasn't even talking to the kids, she was talking to the other dinner guests.

[HayesW]

I have children, plenty of them. When I am out to dinner with my husband, I don't want to talk to or play with your child. I might smile politely, but I don't want them poking me or looking over the top of the booth at me or performing for me.

[dsmith]

And don't talk/text on your cellphone holding up the order line, because I will go around you.:glare: And the whole restaurant doesn't need to hear your phone conversation.

 

Honestly, the adults can be worse than the kids.

[Ellie]

Do not make the waiter repeat the whole menu to you. He already gave you one; read it.

 

If you're in a restaurant that keeps your table supplied with chips and salsa, give the waiter a minute or two to notice that you need a refill, instead of waving him down the instant you lick up the last bit of salsa from the bowl. The chips and salsa are not your meal; you will not starve if you have to wait until he helps other patrons.

[Mejane]

Don't say you're ready to order, then start looking over the menu again frantically when it's your turn. The waitstaff has other tables. (My husband does this. Drives me bonkers.)

 

If you're eating out with small children, don't just get up and walk away leaving the floor littered with paper, crayons, silverware, food and whatnot. At least make an attempt to clean up after your little piggies.

Edited September 29, 2010 by Mejane

[Dobela]

Know of more than one person at the table needs something when the waiter comes to the table. You don't have to 'take turns' and ask the wait staff for 'one more thing' after he/she just brought you 'one more thing'. Honestly, they can bring napkins and extra utensils when they return your glass refilled.

 

Please, don't stare at my family. We realize we are all different colors. And yes, my children know they are adopted.

 

Please, if you see me with my children, use language that children would be allowed to repeat later.

 

If you asked for a substitution but didn't like it, don't complain to the staff about it or reduce a tip because of it. You asked for it, you got what you asked for. Accept it.

[Parrothead]

Do not make the waiter repeat the whole menu to you. He already gave you one; read it.

 

 

Along the same vein, don't make the waiter repeat every single salad dressing available if your are going to end up saying "ranch."

[yellowperch]

Tip fairly.

[Stacia]

Don't say you're ready to order, then start looking over the menu again frantically when it's your turn. The waitstaff has other tables. (My husband does this. Drives me bonkers.)

 

:lol: My dh does exactly the same thing (and it drives me bonkers too). Maybe we should send the 2 of them out to eat together -- they can spend all their time reading the menu & not eating. :tongue_smilie:

 

I dislike being in a booth when the person whose seat backs up to me is bouncing around or wiggles around a lot. I don't like feeling like I'm being jiggled throughout my entire meal.

[angela in ohio]

Kids running around was the number one problem when I waitressed in college (and is probably worse now.) It is rude to other customers and dangerous for the waitress and the children.

 

 

• Don't talk on your cell phone when the waitress wants to take your order.
   
  
• Don't tell her what you need, ask her (It's "May I have ketchup, please" not, "I need ketchup.")
   
  
• Tip fairly (for example, if you have a buy one get one free coupon, you still tip on the full amount.)
   
  
• Don't ask the waitress to lie to your dc ("I don't think they have ice cream, Timmy," wink, wink.) Try parenting instead.
   
  
• Don't punish the waitress for bad food.
   
  
• As a pp mentioned, don't talk or laugh so loud that you ruin others' enjoyment of their meal. If you want to be on stage and get everyone's attention, audition for a play.
  

 

 

I am very picky about how I eat food. I order with every substitution you can think of and specific directions, so we tip very generously and try to be kind in every other way. :001_smile:

[Heatherwith4]

It's not polite to stand up and show your dining party how your knee looks after surgery. Even if the people with you are okay with it, the rest of us are not! If you must stand up and show us your surgery site, please don't rub your rear end all over the back of dh's head in the process. Then, at least have the decency to apologize!!!

[Ellie]

Along the same vein, don't make the waiter repeat every single salad dressing available if your are going to end up saying "ranch."

:glare:

Makes me crazy when people do that.

 

Many years ago I worked at a Bob's Big Boy. Our only choices of salad dressing were thousand island and bleu cheese. I'd say, "Would you like 1000 island or bleu cheese?" and people would say, "Yes."

 

:glare:

[Parrothead]

:glare:

Makes me crazy when people do that.

 

Many years ago I worked at a Bob's Big Boy. Our only choices of salad dressing were thousand island and bleu cheese. I'd say, "Would you like 1000 island or bleu cheese?" and people would say, "Yes."

 

:glare:

:lol:

[Haiku]

Please don't allow your child to stand on the seat and look at me over the back of the booth. Please don't encourage your child to wave to me ... repeatedly.

 

Please keep your kids in their own seats, not roaming the aisles chatting everyone up. I like kids, but I'm not out to dinner with your kids. I'm out to dinner with my friends/family. I know that what your child is doing is the most precious and adorable thing any child has ever done, but my child already did it several years ago. ;)

 

And if your child has questions about why a brown child is calling a white woman mom, please don't act all embarrassed and apologize. There's a simple explanation; if you don't feel capable of giving it to your child, I'd be happy to. :)

 

Tara

[fairfarmhand]

It's not polite to stand up and show your dining party how your knee looks after surgery. Even if the people with you are okay with it, the rest of us are not! If you must stand up and show us your surgery site, please don't rub your rear end all over the back of dh's head in the process. Then, at least have the decency to apologize!!!

 

 

I despise restaurants that are so crowded that incoming people are brushing all over the seated diners.

This is why I prefer booths.

[fairfarmhand]

Please don't allow your child to stand on the seat and look at me over the back of the booth. Please don't encourage your child to wave to me ... repeatedly.

 

Please keep your kids in their own seats, not roaming the aisles chatting everyone up. I like kids, but I'm not out to dinner with your kids. I'm out to dinner with my friends/family. I know that what your child is doing is the most precious and adorable thing any child has ever done, but my child already did it several years ago. ;)

 

And if your child has questions about why a brown child is calling a white woman mom, please don't act all embarrassed and apologize. There's a simple explanation; if you don't feel capable of giving it to your child, I'd be happy to. :)

 

Tara

:iagree:

 

I've been know to tell my kids, God made all kinds of families and all kinds of people. Isn't her dark skin lovely? Wouldn't it be boring if we all were identical?

[Mejane]

:lol: My dh does exactly the same thing (and it drives me bonkers too). Maybe we should send the 2 of them out to eat together -- they can spend all their time reading the menu & not eating. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

 

Maybe this is their problem? :)

 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=food%20envy

Edited September 29, 2010 by Mejane

[Dawn in OH]

Do not allow or encourage your children to come over to my table and talk to my children. My children are sitting down, eating their meal, behaving to my standards. Your children coming over to "visit" are a disruption to our meal and to our toddler who is trying to learn proper restaurant behavior.

[Ellie]

Kids running around was the number one problem when I waitressed in college (and is probably worse now.) It is rude to other customers and dangerous for the waitress and the children.

 

 

Do parents not teach their dc basic table manners??? The running around is awful, children perching on chairs instead of actually sitting on them, children perching on chairs plunging food into their mouths and chewing like cows between bouts of running around...GAH!!

[Hedgehog]

:lol:

 

Love 'em. I needed a good laugh this evening.

[Annie Laurie]

Wow, I guess I've missed noticing the kids who do the running around and chewing with mouths open. This must be why dh and I have been complimented on our kids by neighboring diners several times- they sit still and chew with their mouths closed.

 

My biggest pet peeve is people who are stingy on the tip and then say something like "I'm already paying for the food, they get paid for working here- why should I have to tip them too?" Tipping 20% for good service should be standard practice.

[Starr]

We always tipped generously once we stood up and looked at the floor when our kids were little. How did all that get on the floor?

[Dobela]

Dh just called and was describing a scene he witnessed at lunch today. Adults had 3 children with them, all seemingly between 3 and 6. While the parents sat and chatted the children were pouring out the salt/pepper/sugar all over. Then they began licking the shakers/container lids. UGH! The parents never semed to notice what was happening around them!

[angela in ohio]

Do parents not teach their dc basic table manners???

 

As someone who's had the chance to have lunch and/or dinner with many children, I can safely say that few people are teaching their dc decent table manners.

[Jennifer in MI]

We always tipped generously once we stood up and looked at the floor when our kids were little. How did all that get on the floor?

 

:lol::lol::lol: we've done that. We grabbed the small vacuum and cleaned up our space when that happened.

[pqr]

My biggest pet peeve is people who are stingy on the tip and then say something like "I'm already paying for the food, they get paid for working here- why should I have to tip them too?" Tipping 20% for good service should be standard practice.

 

 

Very much an individual choice. I go high, low and NO tip depending on the waiter or waitress.

 

A tip is not a right it is earned.

Edited September 29, 2010 by pqr

[The Girls' Mom]

It's not polite to stand up and show your dining party how your knee looks after surgery. Even if the people with you are okay with it, the rest of us are not! If you must stand up and show us your surgery site, please don't rub your rear end all over the back of dh's head in the process. Then, at least have the decency to apologize!!!

 

Er...sorry...that was my MIL :tongue_smilie:

[Dawn in OH]

Do parents not teach their dc basic table manners??? The running around is awful, children perching on chairs instead of actually sitting on them, children perching on chairs plunging food into their mouths and chewing like cows between bouts of running around...GAH!!

 

We've had another homeschool family dine with us on several occasions, both at their house and ours, and I can safely say that this particular family is NOT teaching table manners. Even my children were appalled at the way these children ate.

[3littlekeets]

Very much an individual choice. I go high, low and NO tip depending on the waiter or waitress.

 

A tip is not a right it is earned.

 

UGH! Even if service is poor, NO tip means the server PAID to wait on you! In no universe is that fair. The IRS will tax 15% of total sales, if you leave no tip, he or she just paid for the pleasure of being your server. And, servers make FAR less than minimum wage.

 

If you are getting treated poorly, fix it. Talk to a manager.

[Heatherwith4]

Er...sorry...that was my MIL :tongue_smilie:

:lol: :lol:

[pqr]

Originally Posted by pqr

Very much an individual choice. I go high, low and NO tip depending on the waiter or waitress.

 

A tip is not a right it is earned.

 

UGH! Even if service is poor, NO tip means the server PAID to wait on you! In no universe is that fair. The IRS will tax 15% of total sales, if you leave no tip, he or she just paid for the pleasure of being your server. And, servers make FAR less than minimum wage.

 

If you are getting treated poorly, fix it. Talk to a manager.

 

Well then the waiter had better do a good job. It is a simple business proposition, if he performs his duties in an acceptable manner he will get an acceptable tip, if he does a superb job he will get better than an acceptable tip, if he does not perform in an acceptable manner he will get a small tip or nothing.

 

As I said a tip is NOT a right a waiter must earn it.

 

I fail to see how one can argue that I am required to give a tip. A tip is a gratuity which I give in gratitude for a service, if that service was so poor that I feel no gratitude then there will be no tip.

 

By the way I do (sometimes) talk to the manager, but that does not excuse poor service. It really would be odd to talk to the manager and then leave a tip. The problem with talking to the manager is that one can get a waitress in trouble, whereas not leaving a tip or talking directly to her gets a message across without endangering her job.

Edited September 30, 2010 by pqr

[Mrs Mungo]

UGH! Even if service is poor, NO tip means the server PAID to wait on you! In no universe is that fair. The IRS will tax 15% of total sales, if you leave no tip, he or she just paid for the pleasure of being your server. And, servers make FAR less than minimum wage.

 

If you are getting treated poorly, fix it. Talk to a manager.

 

FWIW, pqr lives overseas. In most of Europe tips are usually a small amount, if you tip too much servers actually get offended, like you don't think they will do a good job without a bribe. I don't think they are taxed on tips.

 

That said, there have been some pretty extreme circumstances (2 or 3 times in our almost 20 years together) in the US in which we left a small tip or talked to the manager and had our bill reduced.

Edited September 30, 2010 by Mrs Mungo

[kathkath]

the drop-off childcare place down the street is cheaper than your kid's meal. Do us all a favor.

[Mrs Mungo]

To my knowledge it isn't like this in all countries. I think in Canada a waiter/waitress makes at least min. wage which ranges from 7.50 to 9.50 an hour. (Please correct me if I'm wrong)

 

You are correct (or close to correct, I think servers in Canada might make slightly below min wage, but not much).

 

However, in the US minimum wage is $7.25 and waiters are only required to make $2.13 an hour. That's a significant difference. HOWEVER, if the wages + tips do not = $7.25 then the employer is SUPPOSED to make up the difference. Whether this ever happens in practice, I don't know.

Edited September 30, 2010 by Mrs Mungo

[Miss Sherry]

Very much an individual choice. I go high, low and NO tip depending on the waiter or waitress.

 

A tip is not a right it is earned.

In some places, the waiter or waitress is required to pay taxes on a certain percentage of tips over their hourly wage, whether or not they receive that amount in tips or not. In that instance, I think the tip should automatically be added onto the bill.

[Miss Sherry]

You are correct (or close to correct, I think servers in Canada might make slightly below min wage, but not much).

 

However, in the US minimum wage is $7.25 and waiters are only required to make $2.13 an hour. That's a significant difference. HOWEVER, if the wages + tips do not = $7.25 then the employer is SUPPOSED to make up the difference. Whether this ever happens in practice, I don't know.

That's not a federal law. Each state sets what the minimum wage is. I've never heard of waiters only receiving $2.13 hourly before tips. That is not the case in WA.

[pqr]

In some places, the waiter or waitress is required to pay taxes on a certain percentage of tips over their hourly wage, whether or not they receive that amount in tips or not. In that instance, I think the tip should automatically be added onto the bill.

 

 

Then they better earn them. I do not see the issue here, if one wants a tip earn it, be a top notch waitress. Automatically adding it to a bill removes much incentive to do a good job.

[Mrs Mungo]

That's not a federal law. Each state sets what the minimum wage is. I've never heard of waiters only receiving $2.13 hourly before tips. That is not the case in WA.

 

It IS a federal MINIMUM. You are correct that some states have their OWN minimum wage law that sets a higher amount.

 

Here is a chart from the DOL:

http://www.dol.gov/whd/state/tipped.htm

 

Thanks. I suppose I have a bit of a pet peeve when it's stated that you should tip waiter staff 20% since they make so little money for a hourly wage. I suppose it makes me feel cheap/unfair for tipping less then 20%.

 

I think in Canada where waiters make min. wage tipping 10 to 15% is a acceptable/good tip. That is assuming you aren't a annoying customer with bratty children at a restaurant for longer then average during the busiest time period, .... Again please correct me if I'm wrong.

 

The people saying that you should tip 20% are mostly in the US. Plus, you can see from the chart that it is heavily regional, even in the US. A server in Washington state (as noted above) makes $8.50/hour plus tips. A server in Kansas is making $2.13/hour plus tips. A server here in Hawaii is making $7/hour plus tips. So, people are going to have very different ideas about what people SHOULD do.

Edited September 30, 2010 by Mrs Mungo

[Dawn in OH]

However, in the US minimum wage is $7.25 and waiters are only required to make $2.13 an hour. That's a significant difference. HOWEVER, if the wages + tips do not = $7.25 then the employer is SUPPOSED to make up the difference. Whether this ever happens in practice, I don't know.

 

I was a server in Florida and in Ohio. I was paid $2.13 an hour. No employer ever paid me the difference when my hourly earnings didn't add up to the current minimum wage.

 

I even once had a table, 12 couples for Homecoming, that left me no tip aside from some loose change. I still had to claim 15% of my sales as tips even though no tip was received. I paid to wait on that table that night.

[fairfarmhand]

I thought of some more last night:

 

1. If you come from church on a Sunday afternoon, be polite, make your kids behave and leave a decent tip. My friend who waited tables for years says the WORST times to work are Sundays after church. The church people many times will bring a huge group, be rude and demanding, and then leave a $2 tip for the whole group. She hated working the church crowds.

 

2. WASH YOUR HANDS IN THE BATHROOM! I cannot stand it when people use the restroom and walk out without washing up. Then they go use those same nasty hands to go eat their fries and burger:blink: And all the rest of us have to figure out how to get out of the bathroom without touching the door handle that you just grabbed!!!

[Miss Sherry]

Then they better earn them. I do not see the issue here, if one wants a tip earn it, be a top notch waitress. Automatically adding it to a bill removes much incentive to do a good job.

This is a little harsh sounding I think. You are assuming that you KNOW that waiters and waitresses, who do perform well, are always receiving tips for the work they do. I do not believe that is always the case. Some people are just plain cheap, or overly demanding, and do not tip as they should. :tongue_smilie:

[Miss Sherry]

I was a server in Florida and in Ohio. I was paid $2.13 an hour. No employer ever paid me the difference when my hourly earnings didn't add up to the current minimum wage.

 

I even once had a table, 12 couples for Homecoming, that left me no tip aside from some loose change. I still had to claim 15% of my sales as tips even though no tip was received. I paid to wait on that table that night.

That is just not right. I think the tip should, in those circumstances,automatically be added onto the bill.

I think some people are just rude and feel they should receive a service and then get to decide if they have to pay for it or not.

It's stealing.

[Miss Sherry]

It IS a federal MINIMUM. You are correct that some states have their OWN minimum wage law that sets a higher amount.

 

Here is a chart from the DOL:

http://www.dol.gov/whd/state/tipped.htm

 

 

 

I see some states do not even have a minimum wage of their own set. That's really terrible.

[Haiku]

I see some states do not even have a minimum wage of their own set. That's really terrible.

 

They just go with the federal minimum wage.

 

Tara