Do you & your spouse pray together?

[Joyfullyblessed]

Hello,

 

I hope everyone is doing great. I was wondering how many of you pray with your spouse on a daily basis?

 

I ask this because we all know that the statistic is 1 in every 2 marriages end in divorce. Well, I heard an interesting statistic yesterday that for couples that pray together, those odds go to 1 in every 1052! Wow!!! That is huge!

 

Anyway, my husband and I have talked about doing this, and I am the one that is a touch uncomfortable with doing it together. We are a Christian couple and I do pray, but I am very private in my prayer life. We also say a blessing as a family before each meal, but I just feel a little funny doing prayer together (just my husband and I).

 

However, with statistics that awesome, I am wondering if I should break through my wall and just go for it! I want our marriage to last a lifetime.

 

Soooo... for any of you who pray together regularly, please share any benefits you have seen from it in your marriage (or family life for that matter). Thanks, and have a wonderful day! :001_smile:

[SquirrellyMama]

We do not but I wish we did. I think my dh is very uncomfortable with it and won't do it. One of our pastors' wives said that when they were first married she would put her head under a blanket and that helped her feel more comfortable.

[PineFarmMom]

Hello,

 

 

 

Soooo... for any of you who pray together regularly, please share any benefits you have seen from it in your marriage (or family life for that matter). Thanks, and have a wonderful day! :001_smile:

 

We don't pray daily. We do pray often. I'd say we pray a few times a week. Sometimes we are very good about it and do pray daily and pray seriously over issues. I'd say those are the times God's peace is in our home the most and we see Him working the most powerfully.

 

Benefits: I'm the one who worries about the kids the most. I often discuss a concern I have and we pray about it together and I see God take care of the situation and bring me more peace that He is working. When we pray aloud together we're able to see what concerns the other person and what their heart is at the moment. He and I get along really well, have a great relationship and rarely fight, and I attribute it to the fact that we do pray together and for each other. We've both come to the realization of how much better things are for us with Christ involved!! :001_smile: Also, we often go for long periods without praying and the difference in our peace, relationship, joy, and communication with one another is substantial.

[Friederike in Persia]

My dh gets up in the morning and makes coffee for us.Whilst we drink that we pray together, then he goes to his study and we each have time on our own.

We didn't manage to do this for ages, but the study that you mentioned also jogged us 2 years ago, and we started it then. Doing it with a hot drink and starting of with only 5 minutes at a time really helped.

[FaithManor]

We pray together fairly often but not as a daily devotional, habitual type thing. Not that we wouldn't like to, but DH starts work very early in the morning and I am not with it. He's an early bird and I am in "fuzzy - if I tried to pray right now either my mind would go completely blank or I'd fall to sleep again" land.

 

On the other hand, Dh is pretty wiped out and his brain is ready to veg in the evenings. Whereas, I tend to be more alert, creative, etc. So until his work schedule normalizes (if it ever does) and we can pray in the late afternoon or early evening, we probably won't. However, the thing that does happen often is that we will hear of an emergency for someone in the church or community or on the news, and I will call him between meetings. Then we can quickly pray together on the phone.

 

I do pray regularly with the children.

 

Faith

[chiguirre]

I ask this because we all know that the statistic is 1 in every 2 marriages end in divorce. Well, I heard an interesting statistic yesterday that for couples that pray together, those odds go to 1 in every 1052! Wow!!! That is huge!

 

Here's a link to the Barna marriage survey results. George Barna is an evangelical Christian, so he's definitely not biased against that group.

 

http://www.religioustolerance.org/chr_dira.htm

 

The statistic you quote is dealt with early in the article.

 

OTOH, if you'd like to pray with your dh, go for it! It's certainly a nice idea for a couple, but it's not a magic bullet.

[Chris in VA]

It keeps me real before my husband. For me, hearing my husband's heart and sharing mine with him before the Lord makes me feel truly intimate and bonded together. The fact that my husband sees me n@ked emotionally and spiritually is just as important to me as him seeing me physically! In fact, just between you and me (:lol:) prayer leads to other things from time to time, as a natural result of feeling accepted and loved for who I am.

[lionfamily1999]

Where two or more are in agreement...

 

I think that could be one huge bonus to consider :)

[Dobela]

We do occassionally. It depends on the situation. If it is a big decision or issue (buying a home, child with difficulties, big time serious something) we always make time to pray together. Most of the time though we just share with each other what we are praying about and we then in our own time pray about that as well. Between our schedules it is very hard to find uninterrupted time to pray together very often as well.

[Heidi]

Yes, we pray together every night before we go to bed. We take turns. On even days I pray, on odd days he prays. After we pray together we say our personal prayers silently.

 

I think praying together definitely brings a closeness in our marriage. When you hear your partner pray for you and your family, or express gratitude to God for you and your family, it definitely brings us closer together. Additionally, it's difficult to stay angry or irritated when you pray for him at the end of the day. It's a wonderful habit to get into!

 

I have to mention that we also kneel together as a family in the morning before he goes to work. The whole family (kids included) kneel together in a circle and hold hands and either him or I will pray. Then after we hug and kiss and send dh off to work. It's a wonderful start to our day.

 

We also say a family prayer with the kids before bed, kneeling at their bed. We often have one of the kids say that prayer.

And of course we pray before every meal.

 

Wow, writing this all out, we pray a lot! I definitely have a strong testimony of prayer in the family. It brings a spirit of peace into our home like nothing else can. When we are sincere in our prayers we see a noticeable difference in our tempers and attitudes towards each other.

 

Help that helps! And best of luck making prayer a tradition in your family :001_smile:

[Harriet Vane]

We pray together for a couple minutes in bed at the end of the day. It's quite casual and it's a nice way to end the day. There's also the pre-meal prayers of course. There are times when we have a specific concern for something and we will stop and pray for that thing when we're talking about it, but it's not really planned.

 

Every once in a blue moon dh gets this idea that we should have a long prayer session together, like a church prayer meeting. I'll be honest, I don't find those as fun, but I pray with him because he likes to do that. I'm always glad I did.

 

I suggest starting simple--just a quick couple minutes together before you fall asleep, or perhaps first thing to start your day. Pick a time that works well for you. Don't try to set up too many rules or rituals to it. Just do it, and then move on with life.

[dirty ethel rackham]

Only rarely. I wish we did more often. We pray Grace at meals and he gets us moving to go to mass every Sunday. However, he only prays with me when we are at a retreat type environment where he is put upon to do so. Occasionally, when he has a day off work and we have a school day, he will join us for our morning prayer time. I do wish we had that in our marriage. I would love to be able to know what weighs heavily upon him. He is a pray quietly, not share his faith kind of guy - more a man of action than words.

[laughing lioness]

We do. We pray toghether as a family before meals, holding hands.

We pray together when we have big decisions or when one of us needs support or encouragement. Sometimes they are short prayers, sometimes they are long, meditative, reflective prayers. My dh prays a blessing over the kids each night and we usually do a short prayer together before bed.

A book that was instrumental in our prayer life was "Forever Ruined for the Ordinary" by Joy Dawson.

[dangermom]

Hy husband and I pray together in the evening, we should in the morning too but at that time we have family prayer.

[Jean in Newcastle]

We pray together as a family (a round-robin prayer where we each take turns praying) but not just as a couple. I do pray for my dh and I know that he prays for me too.

[gaillardia]

We pray together every night before he goes to bed. It helps to know that with all the responsibilities I bear that he also takes a great concern for us and to hear the things that concern him and what he is grateful for.

[Teachin'Mine]

We pray together as a family in the evenings, and short prayers at meal times. :)

[Spy Car]

Well, I heard an interesting statistic yesterday that for couples that pray together, those odds go to 1 in every 1052! Wow!!! That is huge!

 

 

:lol::lol::lol:

 

Rather hard to believe. Given:

 

"Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher than for other faith groups, and much higher than Atheists and Agnostics experience."

 

From the linked Barna Research study.

 

Bill

[Guest Cindie2dds]

Yes, several times a day. Helps that he works from home. :)

[newlifemom]

:lol::lol::lol:

 

Rather hard to believe. Given:

 

"Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher than for other faith groups, and much higher than Atheists and Agnostics experience."

 

From the linked Barna Research study.

 

Bill

 

What they are trying to say Bill, if I understand it correctly, is that not many Christian couples pray regularly together. Of the ones who do though, the divorce rate is significantly lower.

 

Does that make sense. I know a lot, [i mean a lot] of Christian couples that do not pray together outside of family meal-time. That is not the prayer Barna is talking about.

 

FTR, dh and I try to pray every night. If we are really tired, which is usually the case:tongue_smilie:, we follow a patter of the 6 minute prayer. We each spend a minute thanking God for something about our spouse, a minute repenting for something we have done to our spouse, and a minute praying a blessing on our spouse. A lot of times that is the jumping off point and it becomes more.

 

We also pray as a family during devotions in the evening and dh and generally have a quick prayer in the morning. [mostly it is begging God for more sleep.:D]

 

I think the stats bear out that intimate prayer with your spouse will help to keep your marriage healthy. Of course it is only in my experience and therefore anecdotal.

[Spy Car]

What they are trying to say Bill, if I understand it correctly, is that not many Christian couples pray regularly together. Of the ones who do though, the divorce rate is significantly lower.

 

Does that make sense. I know a lot, [i mean a lot] of Christian couples that do not pray together outside of family meal-time. That is not the prayer Barna is talking about.

 

FTR, dh and I try to pray every night. If we are really tired, which is usually the case:tongue_smilie:, we follow a patter of the 6 minute prayer. We each spend a minute thanking God for something about our spouse, a minute repenting for something we have done to our spouse, and a minute praying a blessing on our spouse. A lot of times that is the jumping off point and it becomes more.

 

We also pray as a family during devotions in the evening and dh and generally have a quick prayer in the morning. [mostly it is begging God for more sleep.:D]

 

I think the stats bear out that intimate prayer with your spouse will help to keep your marriage healthy. Of course it is only in my experience and therefore anecdotal.

 

But how do the numbers make sense?

 

If Christians have a higher rate of divorce than the non-religious already, and virtually none of the couples who are Christian and do pray together get divorced (1 in every 1052) then minus that subset of the "jointly praying couples" the remaining rate of divorce would be that much higher for the remaining Christian couple over their already high (highest in our society) rate.

 

Couples praying together can't be that rare in Christian circles. So you'd be left with a divorce rate of between 45-99% of all Christian couples (estimation mine) if the 1 in 1052 statistic was true. Which I don't believe is even remotely the case.

 

Bill

Edited March 15, 2010 by Spy Car

[muffinmom]

But how do the numbers make sense?

 

If Christians have a higher rate of divorce than the non-religious already, and virtually none of the couples who are Christian and do pray together get divorced (1 in every 1052) then minus that subset of the "jointly praying couples" the remaining rate of divorce would be that much higher for the remaining Christian couple over their already high (highest in our society) rate.

 

Couples praying together can't be that rare in Christian circles. So you'd be left with a divorce rate of between 45-95% of all Christian couples (estimation mine) if the 1 in 1052 statistic was true. Which I don't believe is even remotely the case.

 

Bill

 

I actually believe it could be rare in Christian circles (ought not to be, but it is). No doubt many if not most Christians pray by themselves, maybe even regularly. But praying with your spouse is a surprisingly intimate thing, even more so than sex. Knowing you are going before God together requires you to lay aside your differences, hurt, and pride, which I daresay most couples are unwilling or unready to do. Now they may occasionally pray "on the surface" together, such as praying for a sick relative or something like that, but the kind of prayer in which both are willing to open up their hearts to each other and before God is rare. But when that happens, healing and forgiveness can flourish.

[dragons in the flower bed]

Soooo... for any of you who pray together regularly, please share any benefits you have seen from it in your marriage (or family life for that matter).

 

Hm... We have a common reference point and can put things in similar terms. I remember once he was throwing coins out the window of the truck. Because we pray hymns to Hermes together, both modern and classical, I immediately thought of that deity, translated that to, "transportation issues?" and braced myself for a stressful evening. I guess it's just good to be on the same spiritual wavelength, not just about what we believe, but about how our own personal spiritual lives are going at the moment, what influences we're seeing, etc.

 

(I hope it was okay for praying non-Christians to participate.)

[newlifemom]

But how do the numbers make sense?

 

If Christians have a higher rate of divorce than the non-religious already, and virtually none of the couples who are Christian and do pray together get divorced (1 in every 1052) then minus that subset of the "jointly praying couples" the remaining rate of divorce would be that much higher for the remaining Christian couple over their already high (highest in our society) rate.

 

Couples praying together can't be that rare in Christian circles. So you'd be left with a divorce rate of between 45-99% of all Christian couples (estimation mine) if the 1 in 1052 statistic was true. Which I don't believe is even remotely the case.

 

Bill

 

One statistics class with a C- and one sociology class do not a numbers person make. So my reply may very well be useless. Sorry. I guess the way I am looking at it is:

 

you have 100 Christian couples. Of that 100 maybe 20 pray regularly together, I mean intimate soul searching/baring prayers. So of the 20 that do, the rate is much lower. Even though I am totally making up #s out of my head, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if this figure or even lower were true.

 

Like I said, I don't do numbers, so I can be totally reading it wrong and unfortunately, I did not follow your numbers. [This is the summer of math for me. :D]

[Impish]

Honestly, its not something that has occurred to me. How bad is that?

 

Like some others, I've always done my praying privately. It took me a long time to be able to pray out loud with my children. I taught them how to pray, would listen to their prayers, but its really only been in the last year that I've prayed out loud with them.

 

Perhaps its to do with becoming stronger in my beliefs in the last year, committed to them in a way I wasn't before.

 

I'm touched and inspired by some of the posts shared here. Thank you.

[Rich with Kids]

We pray together every morning before he leaves for work. Our kids take turns praying at dinner. We have also started sharing blessings we have experienced that day when we are at the dinner table. It makes for very positive conversation. Mine range from relief from depression I have been suffering for the last 6 months to being caught up with the laundry. :001_smile: After a time of much negativity in our household over the last few months, prayer and sharing blessings has brought our family so much closer.

Edited March 15, 2010 by Rich with Kids

[angela in ohio]

I actually believe it could be rare in Christian circles (ought not to be, but it is).

 

I agree. I know very few Christian couples who pray together. I don't know that there is a cause-and-effect relationship, but I do believe that when you start narrowing it down to those Christians who are commited enough to pray together, you will find a lower divorce rate.

 

I also wonder how the divorce rate among religions and regions (from the link) would change if long-term-relationships-that-looked-just-like-marriages breaking up was included. Maybe Christians are just more likely to marry the person they are living with, so when they break it off, it is counted as a divorce. I don't know.

 

When you allow people to self-identify for religion (or anything, for that matter,) I really think it messes with the data. If you re-polled and only counted as Christians those who can identify several characteristics of a living Christian faith in their lives, I have faith ;) that the statistics would change.

[Joyfullyblessed]

Thanks so much for each of your responses. I have enjoyed reading what everyone does and many of the replies are quite encouraging and inspiring.

 

I really think I need to break down the wall that I have and try this out with my husband. There has been lots of negativity in the household due to many life stresses, and while I know this won't fix everything, it could very well be a good start to reducing the negativity here in our home.

 

Also, someone pointed out about Christians having a higher divorce rate than atheists, etc... While that may be true, not everyone that prays is a Christian. There are many other religions that involve prayer. The couple praying does not have necessarily be Christian, so maybe that might explain the statistic a little better.

 

Again, thanks for the replies. Everyone have a great evening! : )

[muffinmom]

When you allow people to self-identify for religion (or anything, for that matter,) I really think it messes with the data. If you re-polled and only counted as Christians those who can identify several characteristics of a living Christian faith in their lives, I have faith ;) that the statistics would change.

 

I agree. I think simply self-identifying as a Christian means virtually nothing.

[Hedgehogs4]

 

However, with statistics that awesome, I am wondering if I should break through my wall and just go for it! I want our marriage to last a lifetime.

 

 

i think what you say is very important - "break through my wall." prayer is such a personal, intimate thing, that it can be very difficult to share. the statistics are probably proving more than just that couples who pray together stay together. these couples are probably more willing to share their deepest heartfelt needs, care for each other in prayer, lift up others that they love together, and "do battle" with and for each other on their knees. the strength that comes from two people being that honest with each other in and of itself is phenomenal, but if in fact God is involved, answering their prayers, and being present in the relationship, it stands to reason why so few of those marriages break up.

 

consider how the enemy would love to see us keep it all to ourselves and be soldiers fighting alone. we're much easier to defeat that way, but "a cord of three strands is not easily broken." i know i need to lay down my pride and pray with my spouse and see what happens when we do!

[Spy Car]

One statistics class with a C- and one sociology class do not a numbers person make. So my reply may very well be useless. Sorry. I guess the way I am looking at it is:

 

you have 100 Christian couples. Of that 100 maybe 20 pray regularly together, I mean intimate soul searching/baring prayers. So of the 20 that do, the rate is much lower. Even though I am totally making up #s out of my head, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if this figure or even lower were true.

 

Like I said, I don't do numbers, so I can be totally reading it wrong and unfortunately, I did not follow your numbers. [This is the summer of math for me. :D]

 

Let's use your assumption that 20% of Christian couple pray together. And let's assume this holds for Non-Denominational* Christians whose divorce rate is 34% according to Barna.

 

That would mean:

 

Of 100 Non-Denominational Christian couples 20 pray together and (with-in the margin of error), none get divorced. Of the remaining couples (80) there will be 34 who do divorce.

 

That makes for a 42.5% divorce rate for Non-Denominational Christians who do not pray together if the other numbers are correct.

 

See what I mean?

 

Bill

 

* "Barna uses the term "non-denominational" to refer to Evangelical Christian congregations that are not affiliated with a specific denomination". The vast majority are fundamentalist in their theological beliefs.

Edited March 15, 2010 by Spy Car

[asta]

SPY!

 

Reign o'er stats!

 

Reign o'er

 

Reign o'er

 

Reign o'er

 

staaaatttttssss.......

 

 

SSSSPPPPPPYYYYY!!!!!

 

 

(apologies to the Who, I'm going to bed)

 

a

[lionfamily1999]

I agree. I think simply self-identifying as a Christian means virtually nothing.

:iagree: How many people say that, because they were christened at birth?

i think what you say is very important - "break through my wall." prayer is such a personal, intimate thing, that it can be very difficult to share. the statistics are probably proving more than just that couples who pray together stay together. these couples are probably more willing to share their deepest heartfelt needs, care for each other in prayer, lift up others that they love together, and "do battle" with and for each other on their knees. the strength that comes from two people being that honest with each other in and of itself is phenomenal, but if in fact God is involved, answering their prayers, and being present in the relationship, it stands to reason why so few of those marriages break up.

 

consider how the enemy would love to see us keep it all to ourselves and be soldiers fighting alone. we're much easier to defeat that way, but "a cord of three strands is not easily broken." i know i need to lay down my pride and pray with my spouse and see what happens when we do!

Wonderfully put :hurray:

[MSNative]

I think we'd all need to see the data to argue for or against this study. The main problem - who is in the groups? Does that population stay in the groups or are they fluid? What if I self describe as agnostic, get divorced, get saved and now self-describe as an Evangelical? Does my divorce count in agnostic, evangelical or both? What if I'm Christian and my husband is Jewish and we get divorced? Is that a Christian or Jewish divorce? See where I'm going with this? Until we know their methods, we're really just guessing.

 

The article was very limiting in its population - born-again, had premarital counseling in the church, attend church regularly and pray together daily. I could easily believe that the divorce rate among those select few is extremely low. Sadly, I know precious few people who qualify for that group.

 

FTR - dh and I pray together about once a week outside of meal times and prayers with the kids.

[newlifemom]

Let's use your assumption that 20% of Christian couple pray together. And let's assume this holds for Non-Denominational* Christians whose divorce rate is 34% according to Barna.

 

That would mean:

 

Of 100 Non-Denominational Christian couples 20 pray together and (with-in the margin of error), none get divorced. Of the remaining couples (80) there will be 34 who do divorce.

 

That makes for a 42.5% divorce rate for Non-Denominational Christians who do not pray together if the other numbers are correct.

 

See what I mean?

 

Bill

 

* "Barna uses the term "non-denominational" to refer to Evangelical Christian congregations that are not affiliated with a specific denomination". The vast majority are fundamentalist in their theological beliefs.

 

 

Ummm, no. I'm so sorry. I feel extremely stupid right now, but for the life of me, I have no idea what you are talking about. :o I normally don't join in these kinds of conversations. I like to maintain some semblance of intelligence.

 

Oh maybe the two figures cannot be coordinated b/c it means that the original rate differs?

 

OY, my head hurts. Always making me think Bill, thanks. :tongue_smilie:

[Spy Car]

Ummm, no. I'm so sorry. I feel extremely stupid right now, but for the life of me, I have no idea what you are talking about. :o I normally don't join in these kinds of conversations. I like to maintain some semblance of intelligence.

 

Oh maybe the two figures cannot be coordinated b/c it means that the original rate differs?

 

OY, my head hurts. Always making me think Bill, thanks. :tongue_smilie:

 

One more time. Out of 100 NDCCs (that's Non-Denominational Christian couples) 34 will divorce according to the study. If 20 couples "pray together" (statistically speaking for our example) none of those 20 couples would divorce. So the 34 couples who will divorce would HAVE TO come from the subset of the 80 couples who don't pray together.

 

If you divide the number who will divorce (34) by the number in the sample (80) then the divorce rate for non-jointly praying NDCCs would equal 34/80 or .425 or 42.5%.

 

Where are my Cuisenaire Rods when I need them? :lol:

 

Bill

[Dobela]

:lol::lol::lol:

 

Rather hard to believe. Given:

 

"Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher than for other faith groups, and much higher than Atheists and Agnostics experience."

 

From the linked Barna Research study.

 

Bill

I would believe that the divorce rates for Christians would be higher than those groups - simply because Christians believe marriage is essential for a man/woman to have a sexual relationship that is correct. Athiets and agnostics don't believe that marriage is required for the relationship to be 'correct'. My guess is that if you compared like numbers of the 3 groups, the Christians would have the highest numbers of married couples, which would lead to higher rates of divorce. If you aren't married, and you separate, you don't get counted in the divorced group.

[newlifemom]

 

Where are my Cuisenaire Rods when I need them? :lol:

 

Bill

 

So we would need some need orange ones and maybe a couple of . . .:D

Edited March 15, 2010 by newlifemom
enter happened a little too quickly for me. My head is still spinning.

[Spy Car]

I would believe that the divorce rates for Christians would be higher than those groups - simply because Christians believe marriage is essential for a man/woman to have a sexual relationship that is correct. Athiets and agnostics don't believe that marriage is required for the relationship to be 'correct'. My guess is that if you compared like numbers of the 3 groups, the Christians would have the highest numbers of married couples, which would lead to higher rates of divorce. If you aren't married, and you separate, you don't get counted in the divorced group.

 

Or could it be that the non-religious have better/happier married lives than NDCCs?

 

And Catholics and Liberal/Mainstream Protestants are also are also less likely to divorce than NDCCs. So the idea of "correct marriage" seems suspect.

 

Are you saying NDCCs prime reason to marry is so they can have sexual relations?

 

Bill

[angela in ohio]

I'm not understanding the correlation of 'non-denominational Christian' to fundamentalist. Where I come from, the non-denominational churches are among the most liberal and secular. Maybe it's a regional thing? :confused:

[Spy Car]

I'm not understanding the correlation of 'non-denominational Christian' to fundamentalist. Where I come from, the non-denominational churches are among the most liberal and secular. Maybe it's a regional thing? :confused:

 

Over my pay-grade. The verbiage below is lifted directly from the linked article:

 

"Barna uses the term "non-denominational" to refer to Evangelical Christian congregations that are not affiliated with a specific denomination. The vast majority are fundamentalist in their theological beliefs."

 

Bill

[Joyfullyblessed]

Alright everyone... I think this is straying from my original question.

 

I simply wanted to know if there were any couples that prayed together and if those couples had seen benefits from it, both in their relationship and with their family in general. I mentioned that I was Christian, but never said that the responses had to be only from other Christians. I wanted to know about the whole praying together with your spouse thing... that's all.

 

I had just heard the statistic yesterday in Sunday school. I thought it was pretty cool. I hadn't seen this whole article that some of you are debating about on here.

 

I do want to thank everyone again who shared your experiences of praying together with your spouse. Those are the type answers I was looking for... I wasn't trying to cause an issue with whether Christians divorce more, or pray more, etc....

 

Everyone have a great evening! :001_smile:

[Spy Car]

Alright everyone... I think this is straying from my original question.

 

I simply wanted to know if there were any couples that prayed together and if those couples had seen benefits from it, both in their relationship and with their family in general. I mentioned that I was Christian, but never said that the responses had to be only from other Christians. I wanted to know about the whole praying together with your spouse thing... that's all.

 

I had just heard the statistic yesterday in Sunday school. I thought it was pretty cool. I hadn't seen this whole article that some of you are debating about on here.

 

I do want to thank everyone again who shared your experiences of praying together with your spouse. Those are the type answers I was looking for... I wasn't trying to cause an issue with whether Christians divorce more, or pray more, etc....

 

Everyone have a great evening! :001_smile:

 

To be fair, your original post gave a statistic saying only 1 in every 1052 couples who pray together divorce. And that seems like a very dubious assertion given the evidence.

 

Bill

[newlifemom]

Alright everyone... I think this is straying from my original question.

 

I simply wanted to know if there were any couples that prayed together and if those couples had seen benefits from it, both in their relationship and with their family in general. I mentioned that I was Christian, but never said that the responses had to be only from other Christians. I wanted to know about the whole praying together with your spouse thing... that's all.

 

I had just heard the statistic yesterday in Sunday school. I thought it was pretty cool. I hadn't seen this whole article that some of you are debating about on here.

 

I do want to thank everyone again who shared your experiences of praying together with your spouse. Those are the type answers I was looking for... I wasn't trying to cause an issue with whether Christians divorce more, or pray more, etc....

 

Everyone have a great evening! :001_smile:

 

Sorry, I just can't wrap my head around math sometimes. I do think that intimate prayer. Like I said earlier, where you are vulnerable to each other before God, is a unifying force. Unfortunately, too few couples do this. I am grateful my dh is such a fighter for this in our marriage! It has made a tremendous difference.

[PeterPan]

Over my pay-grade. The verbiage below is lifted directly from the linked article:

 

"Barna uses the term "non-denominational" to refer to Evangelical Christian congregations that are not affiliated with a specific denomination. The vast majority are fundamentalist in their theological beliefs."

 

Bill

 

That may be referring to newer churches that previously might have been called Fundamental Baptist or Bible churches, are independent/unaffiliated, and are chosing to call themselves non-denominational to avoid the stigma associated with the historically accurate but now highly charged label Fundamentalist. (fundamentalist mormons that are polygamists, fundamentalist muslims that are terrorists, etc.)

[Spy Car]

That may be referring to newer churches that previously might have been called Fundamental Baptist or Bible churches, are independent/unaffiliated, and are chosing to call themselves non-denominational to avoid the stigma associated with the historically accurate but now highly charged label Fundamentalist. (fundamentalist mormons that are polygamists, fundamentalist muslims that are terrorists, etc.)

 

I would have thought this would refer to both older and newer churches that are both independent and (arguably) fundamentalist, and that as you suggest it's a way to avoid a potentially "loaded" term.

 

But I'm no expert.

 

Bill

[mama2cntrykids]

I actually believe it could be rare in Christian circles (ought not to be, but it is). No doubt many if not most Christians pray by themselves, maybe even regularly. But praying with your spouse is a surprisingly intimate thing, even more so than sex. Knowing you are going before God together requires you to lay aside your differences, hurt, and pride, which I daresay most couples are unwilling or unready to do. Now they may occasionally pray "on the surface" together, such as praying for a sick relative or something like that, but the kind of prayer in which both are willing to open up their hearts to each other and before God is rare. But when that happens, healing and forgiveness can flourish.

:DWow! Amen to that sister! You described something that *I* want with my dh...beautiful.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I actually believe it could be rare in Christian circles (ought not to be, but it is). No doubt many if not most Christians pray by themselves, maybe even regularly. But praying with your spouse is a surprisingly intimate thing, even more so than sex. Knowing you are going before God together requires you to lay aside your differences, hurt, and pride, which I daresay most couples are unwilling or unready to do. Now they may occasionally pray "on the surface" together, such as praying for a sick relative or something like that, but the kind of prayer in which both are willing to open up their hearts to each other and before God is rare. But when that happens, healing and forgiveness can flourish.

 

I think it can be a wonderful thing. But - we used to go to a "fundamental non denominational church" which strongly encouraged husbands and wives to pray together like this. Dh has been turned off to doing it because it was a proscribed way to have a "healthy marriage" and ended up being a legalistic thing in that context. We do have intimate conversations with each other which open up our hearts and occasionally it may lead to a conversation with God as well. But it has not been something that is scheduled for us as a couple.

[muffinmom]

I think it can be a wonderful thing. But - we used to go to a "fundamental non denominational church" which strongly encouraged husbands and wives to pray together like this. Dh has been turned off to doing it because it was a proscribed way to have a "healthy marriage" and ended up being a legalistic thing in that context. We do have intimate conversations with each other which open up our hearts and occasionally it may lead to a conversation with God as well. But it has not been something that is scheduled for us as a couple.

 

It would never work as a legalistic thing, because it wouldn't be authentic. I never said anything about scheduling it, though I could see some benefit to coming together regularly, even if one didn't feel like it...as a part of spiritual discipline.

[Jean in Newcastle]

It would never work as a legalistic thing, because it wouldn't be authentic. I never said anything about scheduling it, though I could see some benefit to coming together regularly, even if one didn't feel like it...as a part of spiritual discipline.

 

Oh I know that you didn't. It's just that this church did try to schedule it for their congregation (among other things). The legalistic tendency to try and proscribe things for the congregation was one reason we left.