Rich with Kids Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 :mad: We are involved in a hs P.E. class at the Y. I walked up to pick up my ds12 and heard a MOM :eek: say to him, 'Well, you know you are behind if you hadn't started pre-algebra..." Excuse me? He was so embarrassed and we struggle with math anyway. I was speechless and I want to punch her. I didn't say anything to her 'cuz we were surrounded by kids and he was already so embarrassed. Any words of encouragement for my ds? We're going for a walk so I'll check back in a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Oh my goodness!!! That's just awful. I hope your walk helped. Mean stupid-head is exactly how I'd describe her. What have you said to your ds? I think I'd talk with your ds about how inappropriate it was. Even if it were something true (and it's NOT) - it's something that shouldn't have been said. When I was in ps, the "normal" kids weren't taking pre-algebra until 8th grade. So, your ds certainly isn't behind!!! ((hugs)) to you and your ds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.griff Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Words of encouragement? I believe that George Washington had to learn his math facts when he was an adult, so that he could learn other things. My dd is a number phobic child, she is 13yo and hasn't started pre-algebra or any algebra so don't feel bad. I'd try to teach him to "bean dip" any and all school related conversations with others regarding sensitve topics in the future, though I know it can really catch you off guard and you end up answering questions that are Nunya to the questioner. Lots of hugs, and to that woman- Puh-LEASE! And how is she doing with her Calculus anyway? ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
battlemaiden Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 "Some people are WAY behind in their social skills" Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colleen Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 The "mean stupid heads" reminds me of Ree's brother Mike yelling, "Turkey **** Butt Hell Ass!" when he's angry.:D Sorry about that incident, btw. I wouldn't make an issue of it with your son. Just let him know that people have different ideas ~ and some of them aren't worth a great deal of consideration. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janet in WA Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 All I can say is that it's this kind of attitude that kept us from being very interested in socializing heavily with other homeschoolers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie N Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 "Some people are WAY behind in their social skills" Jo Oh! Very good!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 First, she's a butt. Sorry, someone had to say it. Second, tell your son my triplets are 13 and only half way through pre-alg. And tell him that some people have to run others down in order to feel good about themselves. *Spitting the bad taste of her remark out of my mouth.....Phooey* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 What was the point of that? I think I'd start by telling your ds some people like to make themselves feel better by tearing other people down. Then I'd point out that lady's behavior was downright rude and shows poor character regardless of how much algebra she knows. Your ds has plenty of time to learn math, while she obviously missed out on social skills 101. Good grief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GothicGyrl Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 "Some people are WAY behind in their social skills" Jo What Jo said, then I would have punched her. ;) And I LOVE Mike's "Turkey butt hell **** ass" battle cry---it's my own mantra now. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 :mad: We are involved in a hs P.E. class at the Y. I walked up to pick up my ds12 and heard a MOM :eek: say to him, 'Well, you know you are behind if you hadn't started pre-algebra..." Excuse me? He was so embarrassed and we struggle with math anyway. I was speechless and I want to punch her. I didn't say anything to her 'cuz we were surrounded by kids and he was already so embarrassed. Any words of encouragement for my ds? We're going for a walk so I'll check back in a bit. What an uncharitable woman. Behind whom, I'd love to know? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 fillllllllllllllllllllllllllller Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.griff Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 I am PMing you GG :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Some people think they make themselves bigger by putting others down. Can you imagine the insecurity that one must have to have to make yourself seem better by putting down a TWELVE y/o? Honestly. Ugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreenKitty Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 That's awful! Sorry that happened. I would have felt like popping her a good one...but am very quick with words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Is this the one who's 12? Ummmm, kids can still do Algebra I as freshmen! Why do we always feel the need to rush kids through every course and into what we call "college" level work? I just read the justification that American high schools are doing okay because "more and more" kids are taking AP courses. Okay. And lots of those are dumbed down, too, as are lots of actual college classes. We live in a feel good society where schools want to "sell" their customers on their product just like the next business down the street. If they think they can impress parents by selling the idea that their kids are so advanced and doing such high level work, do you think they'll skip the chance? Has Algebra changed from what it was when we took it in high school? Does it really matter what year you take higher level maths? Lots of kids just aren't ready to do Algebra work when they're 11 or 12 years old - or even 13, for that matter. Geesh..... Is he planning on pursuing a career that requires him to have lots of higher level maths? If not, what's the rush? He does NOT have to do Algebra as an eighth grader in order to keep up in high school. He can most certainly do it as a freshman. What are your state's requirements for high school level maths for graduation? Is anything other than Alg I, II and Geometry required? Even if one other math is required, it can often be statistics or some other more practical math. If you told me he was a sophomore and still wasn't doing Algebra, but wanted to go to college, I might be concerned. But as I see things from what you've told me, I'm not concerned..... Regena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa at Home Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Maybe if the OP read up on Mike, it would help lift her spirits! ~Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich with Kids Posted February 27, 2008 Author Share Posted February 27, 2008 I feel better. Dh and I discussed it on our walk and decided to let it go and not embarrass him any further. BTW, Ds doesn't know I heard the mean F%$@#&* B*&%$. I think we'll have some confidence boosting math tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich with Kids Posted February 27, 2008 Author Share Posted February 27, 2008 Is this the one who's 12? Ummmm, kids can still do Algebra I as freshmen! Why do we always feel the need to rush kids through every course and into what we call "college" level work? I just read the justification that American high schools are doing okay because "more and more" kids are taking AP courses. Okay. And lots of those are dumbed down, too, as are lots of actual college classes. We live in a feel good society where schools want to "sell" their customers on their product just like the next business down the street. If they think they can impress parents by selling the idea that their kids are so advanced and doing such high level work, do you think they'll skip the chance? Has Algebra changed from what it was when we took it in high school? Does it really matter what year you take higher level maths? Lots of kids just aren't ready to do Algebra work when they're 11 or 12 years old - or even 13, for that matter. Geesh..... Is he planning on pursuing a career that requires him to have lots of higher level maths? If not, what's the rush? He does NOT have to do Algebra as an eighth grader in order to keep up in high school. He can most certainly do it as a freshman. What are your state's requirements for high school level maths for graduation? Is anything other than Alg I, II and Geometry required? Even if one other math is required, it can often be statistics or some other more practical math. If you told me he was a sophomore and still wasn't doing Algebra, but wanted to go to college, I might be concerned. But as I see things from what you've told me, I'm not concerned..... Regena My plan is to go through Algebra 11 and Geometry. He wants to go into the military, so I think that will cover what he needs. My dd13, however, wants to go to a college that requires 3 1/2 credits in math, so we'll have to do Statistics or something. Anyway...I am in no way concerned that he's behind. My concern was his fragile little heart. He feels very deeply and is very insecure. Thanks for your kind words. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kris Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 What an idiot. I feel sorry for her kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KAR120C Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Yeesh!! :eek: What kind of person says that to a kid???? I think I'd need to confront her about it (not in front of him of course), and suggest that if she were to have any further concerns about your DS's education that you'd appreciate her coming straight to you instead of embarrassing him in front of his friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Yeesh!! :eek: What kind of person says that to a kid???? I think I'd need to confront her about it (not in front of him of course), and suggest that if she were to have any further concerns about your DS's education that you'd appreciate her coming straight to you instead of embarrassing him in front of his friends. This would be my approach too. After I came here for a confidence boost, of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Why don't you just make a contact with some military personnel or look online and get an idea of what kind of requirements he might need for areas that are of interest to him? If he wants to work on machinery, then he may need more math skills. But if he wants to be a Radar-type guy, like my Dad was, then he needs more practical math/accounting type skills. Perhaps that would help to reassure him? Regena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Bear Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Too bad that mama is her kid's worst enemy, huh? Hugs to you and your punkin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doran Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Don't you wish you/your son had the presence of mind to reply in some perfectly appropriate fashion? Not nasty, but head high, with "you are a twit" emblazoned in your eyes: Option 1: I'm sorry....what's that you said about your big behind? Option 2: We have years to get our math work done, but clearly you might want to consider a remedial course in common courtesy. Option 3: Turkey **** Butt Hell Ass!!! Oh, you'll have to excuse me - it's this tic I have whenever I'm around people who are completely irritating. Anyway, you have my sympathies. She is a dolt. Hug your son extra tight tomorrow for no reason at all and find a real reason to compliment him in public. He's fortunate to have a sensitive mother like you. Doran Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hillary in KS Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Don't you wish you/your son had the presence of mind to reply in some perfectly appropriate fashion? Not nasty, but head high, with "you are a twit" emblazoned in your eyes: Option 1: I'm sorry....what's that you said about your big behind? Option 2: We have years to get our math work done, but clearly you might want to consider a remedial course in common courtesy. Option 3: Turkey **** Butt Hell Ass!!! Oh, you'll have to excuse me - it's this tic I have whenever I'm around people who are completely irritating. Doran....I think I love you. Is that appropriate to write on this forum? I hope so. These are fantastic! Hillary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Don't you wish you/your son had the presence of mind to reply in some perfectly appropriate fashion? Not nasty, but head high, with "you are a twit" emblazoned in your eyes: Option 1: I'm sorry....what's that you said about your big behind? Doran LOL!!!!!! You are so funny, Doran! I would have probably said something to her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph the vet Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 I am so sorry your ds had to experience her obvious lack of compassion or tact. That said, since so many of us out there put our feet in our mouths at the most inopportune times, your ds may run into another person like her down the road. This is a great opportunity for training in forgiveness. I am just thinking that people hurt us and if we let it simmer or retaliate in like fashion we are letting a root of bitterness grow up in us. But if we can forgive them, even when they don't think they did anything wrong, we can rise above the situation and let it go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mysticamethyst Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Yes, some people are just social retards. I cannot believe she said that! You can tell your son as well that my son who is going to be 13 just went back to 2nd and 3rd grade math so that he can grasp the basics better. She was incredibly rude! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs. Readsalot Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 I can't even imagine what would compel someone to say something like that. I figure she is a person who speaks without thinking. They can be so annoying. You have probably spent more time worrying, being anger etc over it than she has. Don't give her that power, she is not worth it. This is what I would tell your son. Never let someone else have the power to control your feelings etc. If he learns this skill now it will help him in the future. This is a difficult skill for any of us to learn. Sorry you are having to deal with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoughCollie Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Maybe I'm way off base here, but I consider all math that comes before algebra to be pre-algebra. I took algebra in the 9th grade and I know for sure that no one ever called any of my prior math classes "pre" algebra. I know that some schools do have courses entitled "pre-algebra" now, but I think that's just to make everyone, including the parents, feel good. Give me a break! Calling a math class "pre-algebra" is like calling lunch "pre-dinner". That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it! Calling that woman a "mean stupid-head" for making herself feel superior at the expense of your son was very polite. I'd have directly told her that she was making herself feel superior, etc., since kids were around. If I got her alone, I'd say a lot more that I probably shouldn't print here because my choice of words would not be nearly as polite as yours. I think you handled it well, though, considering that you are undoubtedly not as uncivilized as I can be when I get riled up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Yeesh!! :eek: What kind of person says that to a kid???? I think I'd need to confront her about it (not in front of him of course), and suggest that if she were to have any further concerns about your DS's education that you'd appreciate her coming straight to you instead of embarrassing him in front of his friends. I would add also--you might consider telling your son that this woman was wrong in her assessment. I wonder if the poor kid is going to replay her words in his head in insecure moments now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyinTN Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Some people need a club upside the head!:mad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich with Kids Posted February 27, 2008 Author Share Posted February 27, 2008 My ds is cool. So we sat down to do math this morning and I decided to bring up what I heard yesterday. I told him one of the reasons we homeschool was that everyone learns differently. I printed out a page of "7th grade math" that I found online. (He's in 6th) It actually had a title that read 7th grade math. :) He aced it (I chose fairly easy problems that I knew he could do) I told him that what that lady said was incorrect and he did the work to prove that. Ds: Why did she say that? And in front of my friends? That was just rude? Me: But I want you to understand that she was wrong. I don't know why she said it, but you need to trust me that I am teaching you what you need when you need it. Ds: Got it. Can I go play basketball now? So...I think we're good. Thanks for talking me through it yesterday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 I'm glad that he's cool with it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A.J. at J.A. Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 You know...that is another main reason why I LOVE homeschooling! First off, you were able to be there with your kiddo when that lady said that. What if he were in PS and the volunteer said that to him and you'd never known. He could have been upset inside and it could have eaten at him. Also, you had the time, energy and ability to reschedule your math "plan" for the day to address the issue, rebuild his confidence and discuss her wrong actions in a very intelligent and helpful way with your son! Kudos to you!! That is wonderful and I'm so glad you gave us an update. Angela Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elisabeth in IL Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Great way to handle this situation!!!! You did and are doing a good job from which your son benefits. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PariSarah Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 Don't you wish you/your son had the presence of mind to reply in some perfectly appropriate fashion? Not nasty, but head high, with "you are a twit" emblazoned in your eyes: LOL! I always thought of my patented "I beg your pardon?" as the perfect all-occasion non-put-down put-down, but I think I'm going to fantasize about using these. :D RWK, I'm glad your ds was not overly traumatized by it. :cool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted February 27, 2008 Share Posted February 27, 2008 "Some people are WAY behind in their social skills" Jo nt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 My ds is cool. So we sat down to do math this morning and I decided to bring up what I heard yesterday. I told him one of the reasons we homeschool was that everyone learns differently. I printed out a page of "7th grade math" that I found online. (He's in 6th) It actually had a title that read 7th grade math. :) He aced it (I chose fairly easy problems that I knew he could do) I told him that what that lady said was incorrect and he did the work to prove that. Ds: Why did she say that? And in front of my friends? That was just rude? Me: But I want you to understand that she was wrong. I don't know why she said it, but you need to trust me that I am teaching you what you need when you need it. Ds: Got it. Can I go play basketball now? So...I think we're good. Thanks for talking me through it yesterday. Honestly, you handled this perfectly with him. Good job! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdWTMer Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 I have to agree with Hillary. ROFLOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen sn Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 Explain common sense. Some of us are lucky to have it, it can not be taught, this woman obviously does not have it! Algebra schmalgebra! You'll get to it when you get to it. Even Einstein failed algebra! Gimme a break! I'd have shot her a look and she would have NEVER again spoken to my kid. Some people are such idiots! My dd is "behind" by other people's standards. I thank heaven every day for her common sense! All kids eventually "get there" in formal education if given time and instruction. Common sense can not be taught. That's what I would have said to her. "Yes, no algebra yet, but he has manners and common sense. So lacking in the general population don't you agree?" (Said while smiling sweetly.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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