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My birth story

Elizabeth86

By Elizabeth86,
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Elizabeth86

Elizabeth86

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I’m not sure if it needs any trigger warnings, but maybe? Idk. What specifically idk, but when I read it, it makes me feel pretty anxious. lol

If you know nothing about FER here is a little info I found online. I can’t remember , is there a problem doing this? If so I will delete and just link it.

Fetal ejection reflex triggers

FER is a normal part of labor for all women. It can be triggered when:

  • The mother feels a threat in the last stage of labor and is close to giving birth. It’s easier and safer to expel the baby than for labor to stop, as would happen if early labor is disturbed
  • A mother is undisturbed, feels completely safe and supported, uninterrupted by noise, lights or forced eye contact.
  • Mothers are threatened with interventions or feel fear for their babies’ safety in the second stage of labor, and are close to giving birth.

Spoiler alert. The second one is not the reason I experienced FER.

There was a lot going on leading up to my birth, but y’all were experiencing that live. At my last dr appointment I was 4cm and 50 % effaced. I was starting to feel confident labor would start and I would have my vbac. Thursday I had contractions and I would feel confident and then they just stalled out. I woke up Friday morning having super close and strong contractions. I was sure I was in labor. As we got closer to the hospital the contractions stopped. I was so frustrated. I’ve never had a labor that stopped and started. As many contractions as I had, I was certain I had progressed since my last doctor visit. I decided to go on in the hospital and the nurse did a cervical check and she said I was 3.5 cm. I was super aggravated because I almost felt like my OB lied at my appointment to encourage me so I’d let her induce me. I was already 41 + 1 and as many contractions as I had, I felt maybe my body was ready and I decided to go on and go through with an induction. I was terrified with my decision because I knew the regret would kill me if I went through with it and it ended in a c section. On the other hand, I was nervous with my high bp, possible meconium (I was worried baby was in distress). I was super miserable thinking that choosing an induction would result in a csection. We just agreed it was time to try. The doctor came in at 8 am and broke my water and started Pitocin. I felt  super encouraged when I started contracting. My csection was a result of Pitocin not working, so I kind of had it in my mind Pitocin wouldn’t work for me. Everything was going pretty good. At one point I had a cervical check and I was 6 cm and 100% effaced. Reality set in that this was really going to be a success. Now I don’t have a great timeline for this, but OB was joking he’d like to be finished up for lunch just lighthearted kidding that made me feel confident things were going well (and they were). At some point labor didn’t exactly stall, but the contractions were slowing down unless I was actively on the birth ball or swaying or moving. I of course was good to do this, but if I just sat during a contraction it made them come weak and far apart and I had to move a lot to get labor to pick up again. I felt labor was about to stall and I felt panicked. At some point they pointed out baby’s heart rate was slowing way down with each contraction. They said it was probably a cord wrapped around his neck, but he recovered from each contraction ok so they were still encouraged all was well. The nurse assured me she was watching my monitor very closely. At some point I felt she felt worried too. Like no one was in danger, but I got the feeling that she had the feeling something was about to take a turn for the worse. She asked if she could check to see if I progressed and there was no change. She seemed like maybe she had expected and hoped I had and I felt that I should have dilated more too. When she told me 6cm still,  I panicked because I felt I was running out of time to get baby out safely before a csection would be something that would have to happen. My body just became out of control and I generally do a great job being in control of my labor. I keep calm, don’t scream or panic. Well I was frantic. My controlled breathing became loud moaning and very animalistic. I know for sure the nurses thought I was just putting on because I was breathing calmly and it just flipped to full blown moaning. I told the nurse I had to change positions quick . I needed to grab the peanut ball, lean over it and squat on the bed. It didn’t satisfy me so she quickly put a bar on the bed I squatted and leaned over the bar. I yelled for my dh to come press on my back and let me grab onto his shirt. He was the only person in the room that knew what was happening it seemed. He said he had seen all my births and knew the baby was about to come. I didn’t even realize it.  The nurse had just said I was 6cm so that was not on their radar. He pressed on my back with the next contraction and he said “you are pushing, I felt it.” I said that I wasn’t. I felt a sensation at the top of my uterus that felt like it was l lifting up and the baby was coming out. Uterine rupture was on my radar because of the vbac, so I just knew this was happening. I freaked out!! I started screaming for them to get my baby out because I thought I was rupturing. I picked up the call button and screamed for help at the top of my lungs because I thought I was rupturing and no one was helping fast enough. I contacted and my dh said I was pushing again(I was NOT pushing because I thought I was 6cm and I thought I was rupturing) Sure enough my uterus felt like it lifted up and my baby flew out on the bed. There were nurses all over my room,  it was happening so fast  nothing was really getting done quick enough it seemed. The resident doctor stood at the curtain frozen with fear. lol  I don’t think she had seen anything quite like it before. The doctor missed it too. I was purely shocked. The nurse looked it up later and the time between that last cervical check when I panicked about still being 6cm and the time the baby was out was 8 minutes. It was unreal. I asked if he had the cord around his neck, but no one really knew because he just appeared. So, needless to say that was my most interesting birth. I was in awe of what my body did. I perceived that my body and baby was in danger and my body just took over got the job done and I’m thankful it did. I was thrilled I avoided a csection. My birth was far was lovely and peaceful like my other vaginal births, but I’m just glad I avoided the c section I was so afraid of. I hope I didn’t leave anything out. lol

 

 

 

 

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Scarlett

Scarlett

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19 minutes ago, Elizabeth86 said:

I’m not sure if it needs any trigger warnings, but maybe? Idk. What specifically idk, but when I read it, it makes me feel pretty anxious. lol

If you know nothing about FER here is a little info I found online. I can’t remember , is there a problem doing this? If so I will delete and just link it.

Fetal ejection reflex triggers

FER is a normal part of labor for all women. It can be triggered when:

  • The mother feels a threat in the last stage of labor and is close to giving birth. It’s easier and safer to expel the baby than for labor to stop, as would happen if early labor is disturbed
  • A mother is undisturbed, feels completely safe and supported, uninterrupted by noise, lights or forced eye contact.
  • Mothers are threatened with interventions or feel fear for their babies’ safety in the second stage of labor, and are close to giving birth.

Spoiler alert. The second one is not the reason I experienced FER.

There was a lot going on leading up to my birth, but y’all were experiencing that live. At my last dr appointment I was 4cm and 50 % effaced. I was starting to feel confident labor would start and I would have my vbac. Thursday I had contractions and I would feel confident and then they just stalled out. I woke up Friday morning having super close and strong contractions. I was sure I was in labor. As we got closer to the hospital the contractions stopped. I was so frustrated. I’ve never had a labor that stopped and started. As many contractions as I had, I was certain I had progressed since my last doctor visit. I decided to go on in the hospital and the nurse did a cervical check and she said I was 3.5 cm. I was super aggravated because I almost felt like my OB lied at my appointment to encourage me so I’d let her induce me. I was already 41 + 1 and as many contractions as I had, I felt maybe my body was ready and I decided to go on and go through with an induction. I was terrified with my decision because I knew the regret would kill me if I went through with it and it ended in a c section. On the other hand, I was nervous with my high bp, possible meconium (I was worried baby was in distress). I was super miserable thinking that choosing an induction would result in a csection. We just agreed it was time to try. The doctor came in at 8 am and broke my water and started Pitocin. I felt  super encouraged when I started contracting. My csection was a result of Pitocin not working, so I kind of had it in my mind Pitocin wouldn’t work for me. Everything was going pretty good. At one point I had a cervical check and I was 6 cm and 100% effaced. Reality set in that this was really going to be a success. Now I don’t have a great timeline for this, but OB was joking he’d like to be finished up for lunch just lighthearted kidding that made me feel confident things were going well (and they were). At some point labor didn’t exactly stall, but the contractions were slowing down unless I was actively on the birth ball or swaying or moving. I of course was good to do this, but if I just sat during a contraction it made them come weak and far apart and I had to move a lot to get labor to pick up again. I felt labor was about to stall and I felt panicked. At some point they pointed out baby’s heart rate was slowing way down with each contraction. They said it was probably a cord wrapped around his neck, but he recovered from each contraction ok so they were still encouraged all was well. The nurse assured me she was watching my monitor very closely. At some point I felt she felt worried too. Like no one was in danger, but I got the feeling that she had the feeling something was about to take a turn for the worse. She asked if she could check to see if I progressed and there was no change. She seemed like maybe she had expected and hoped I had and I felt that I should have dilated more too. When she told me 6cm still,  I panicked because I felt I was running out of time to get baby out safely before a csection would be something that would have to happen. My body just became out of control and I generally do a great job being in control of my labor. I keep calm, don’t scream or panic. Well I was frantic. My controlled breathing became loud moaning and very animalistic. I know for sure the nurses thought I was just putting on because I was breathing calmly and it just flipped to full blown moaning. I told the nurse I had to change positions quick . I needed to grab the peanut ball, lean over it and squat on the bed. It didn’t satisfy me so she quickly put a bar on the bed I squatted and leaned over the bar. I yelled for my dh to come press on my back and let me grab onto his shirt. He was the only person in the room that knew what was happening it seemed. He said he had seen all my births and knew the baby was about to come. I didn’t even realize it.  The nurse had just said I was 6cm so that was not on their radar. He pressed on my back with the next contraction and he said “you are pushing, I felt it.” I said that I wasn’t. I felt a sensation at the top of my uterus that felt like it was l lifting up and the baby was coming out. Uterine rupture was on my radar because of the vbac, so I just knew this was happening. I freaked out!! I started screaming for them to get my baby out because I thought I was rupturing. I picked up the call button and screamed for help at the top of my lungs because I thought I was rupturing and no one was helping fast enough. I contacted and my dh said I was pushing again(I was NOT pushing because I thought I was 6cm and I thought I was rupturing) Sure enough my uterus felt like it lifted up and my baby flew out on the bed. There were nurses all over my room,  it was happening so fast  nothing was really getting done quick enough it seemed. The resident doctor stood at the curtain frozen with fear. lol  I don’t think she had seen anything quite like it before. The doctor missed it too. I was purely shocked. The nurse looked it up later and the time between that last cervical check when I panicked about still being 6cm and the time the baby was out was 8 minutes. It was unreal. I asked if he had the cord around his neck, but no one really knew because he just appeared. So, needless to say that was my most interesting birth. I was in awe of what my body did. I perceived that my body and baby was in danger and my body just took over got the job done and I’m thankful it did. I was thrilled I avoided a csection. My birth was far was lovely and peaceful like my other vaginal births, but I’m just glad I avoided the c section I was so afraid of. I hope I didn’t leave anything out. lol
 

 

 

 

That might be the craziest birth story I’ve ever heard! Glad you are all ok.  

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Elizabeth86

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2 minutes ago, freesia said:

Whoa! That’s crazy! Birth is so wild and unpredictable and weird. Hugs for you all!

Yes, it was wild. I just keeping replaying over with my dh because I’m in awe of what the body can do. I never would guess anything like this would ever happen.

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Wow. What an experience! So glad he is here safe and sound! I had something--not the same--but similar with my last. I, too, was induced because of high bp. They thought that when my membranes were stripped and water broken, that labor would ensue quickly. Baby wasn't due for another couple of weeks, but I had been on meds to prevent labor for a couple of months. I had been told to go to the hospital at night. All night, contractions were off and on, and I was walking the halls. I was overseas, and they don't check dilation much. The next morning, still nothing. Finally, they put me on Pitocin. At 12:30, I had a strong contraction. About 30 minutes later, I had the next one, and they started coming rapidly. I have always been pretty under control with my labors. But I thought I was going to go mad; I, too, was thinking of my uterus rupturing. This wasn't a VBAC, but I was definitely an older mom with numerous kids, and I had never hurt like this previously. I told the assisting doctor I felt like I was splitting open. What I didn't realize at the time, was that I was in transition. I had never experienced it like that before, and losing control. It's a wonder I didn't break dh's hand, I was holding it so hard. If I had known I was in transition, I don't think I would have panicked. I just thought that there was no way I could do this for several hours. Then, all of a sudden, I needed to push. It was freaky. They got me to the delivery room, and baby was born. That whole part lasted about an hour. Thankfully, my baby was fine too.

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Elizabeth86

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2 minutes ago, Jaybee said:

Wow. What an experience! So glad he is here safe and sound! I had something--not the same--but similar with my last. I, too, was induced because of high bp. They thought that when my membranes were stripped and water broken, that labor would ensue quickly. Baby wasn't due for another couple of weeks, but I had been on meds to prevent labor for a couple of months. I had been told to go to the hospital at night. All night, contractions were off and on, and I was walking the halls. I was overseas, and they don't check dilation much. The next morning, still nothing. Finally, they put me on Pitocin. At 12:30, I had a strong contraction. About 30 minutes later, I had the next one, and they started coming rapidly. I have always been pretty under control with my labors. But I thought I was going to go mad; I, too, was thinking of my uterus rupturing. This wasn't a VBAC, but I was definitely an older mom with numerous kids, and I had never hurt like this previously. I told the assisting doctor I felt like I was splitting open. What I didn't realize at the time, was that I was in transition. I had never experienced it like that before, and loosing control. It's a wonder I didn't break dh's hand, I was holding it so hard. If I had known I was in transition, I don't think I would have panicked. I just thought that there was no way I could do this for several hours. Then, all of a sudden, I needed to push. It was freaky. They got me to the delivery room, and baby was born. That whole part lasted about an hour. Thankfully, my baby was fine too.

It’s a wild sensation! Yes, I’m glad you said that because I forgot that detail until you said it. I’ve had all my vaginal births with no drugs and never thought the pain was unbearable, but I was asking did they still have the laughing gas they were offering earlier when I had the thought I’d have to endure that pain for what I thought was going to be hours. I had NO idea my baby was anywhere close to coming out.

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Elizabeth86

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5 minutes ago, Dianthus said:

Wow. I laughed out loud,  shocked by the craziness. So glad it worked out for you and it sounds like an emotional rollercoaster!

Dh and I just randomly start laughing about it too. I also feel terrible for any first time mommas that may have heard any of the commotion or any small children visiting. I was 💯 out of control. 

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Elizabeth86

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5 minutes ago, mommyoffive said:

Wow, he is quite the dramatic little guy isn't he??  Waiting for him was a story and so was his birth.  Awesome job momma!!  I think it is so funny how fast he came out when he had us waiting all those days!!  

I know! I can’t wait to really get to know his personality. As a newborn he is super chill and sweet and vastly different form the little trouble maker he started out as. I 💯 think he is trying make sure he stays the baby of the family.

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1 minute ago, Elizabeth86 said:

It’s a wild sensation! Yes, I’m glad you said that because I forgot that detail until you said it. I’ve had all my vaginal births with no drugs and never thought the pain was unbearable, but I was asking did they still have the laughing gas they were offering earlier when I had the thought I’d have to endure that pain for what I thought was going to be hours. I had NO idea my baby was anywhere close to coming out.

Right. The only time I needed drugs was with the twins, because the second one was transverse and the doctor needed to manipulate her. He knew that ahead of time, so gave me an epidural, but not enough to numb everything.

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Dianthus

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1 minute ago, Elizabeth86 said:

Dh and I just randomly start laughing about it too. I also feel terrible for any first time mommas that may have heard any of the commotion or any small children visiting. I was 💯 out of control. 

I remember a woman screaming down the hall when I went to the hospital for my first labor and it freaked me out.

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Dianthus

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I never had an epidural. The thought of someone tapping my spine freaked me out even more. 3 out of 4 of my births were unmedicated. I didn't find the IV pain med to be helpful the one time I had it. I did have very fast labors and was never less than 8 going into the hospital. I always started dilating a month early.

Congrats to you and what an exciting story! Tell it every birthday!

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mommyoffive

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3 minutes ago, Elizabeth86 said:

I know! I can’t wait to really get to know his personality. As a newborn he is super chill and sweet and vastly different form the little trouble maker he started out as. I 💯 think he is trying make sure he stays the baby of the family.

That was what I was thinking waiting for him.   

But my craziest delivery, were I accidentally gave birth at home didn't end up being my last.  😉 

I am glad he is such a chill baby.  Thanks for sharing your amazing story.

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Elizabeth86

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Just now, Melissa Louise said:

It's really OK to be 'out of control' aka loud and demanding in labor.

My personal experience is that vocalizing helps.

Oh I’m sure it is, but screaming for help into the call button thing just make feel a bit embarrassed. 

 

1 minute ago, Eos said:

Same!  Thank you for this story, you are amazing.  You must have been terrified that you were rupturing, but I love that your dh knew what was happening.

I love it too! I’ve always been in awe of dh’s intuitive nature and his ability to keep his cool no matter what. There was one nurse that seemed to have it together she and my dh were by my side but the room read pretty chaotic. The resident doctor stood frozen. It’s wild.

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Just now, Elizabeth86 said:

Oh I’m sure it is, but screaming for help into the call button thing just make feel a bit embarrassed. 

 

I love it too! I’ve always been in awe of dh’s intuitive nature and his ability to keep his cool no matter what. There was one nurse that seemed to have it together she and my dh were by my side but the room read pretty chaotic. The resident doctor stood frozen. It’s wild.

That resident has a story to tell now, too! My dad was a family doctor way back when, and delivered many, many babies. I don't know that I can get the details right in his resident story: He was attending a woman who I believe was having about her 10th or 12th child. She told him that her babies came fast and she only pushed once. Back then, like with my experience overseas, there was a labor room and a delivery room. The residents gave each other a hard time if their patient had the baby in the labor room rather than the delivery room, so Daddy was determined that wasn't going to happen to him. However, he was checking her when she had a massive contraction, and she pushed that baby right out, right then! It's good for the residents to have a humbling experience now and then.😂

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Not the same at all, but reminds me of my last one. She was a week late and ended up being induced. My first two were 2 and 3 weeks early so this was unusual for me.

I kept setting off the blood pressure alarms (too low) and then her heart rate started going down with contractions. Doctor came in and had me sign a consent for a c section. I was pretty  upset. He said if I wasn’t at 10 next time we checked, he was wheeling me back. He checked and said I was an 8. I remember being so upset that I would have a c section. Then I suddenly had this giant contraction, went to 10, and her head came out…all in about 20 seconds. I didn’t push at all and she came all the way out seconds later.

I remember my doctor pleading with me to wait since he hadn’t changed (and was wearing what must have been pretty expensive dress clothes/shoes that became quite messy). I couldn’t have stopped because I wasn’t even doing anything—it just happened.

All was well…it was just a wild ending. 
congratulations!!!

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Elizabeth86

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1 minute ago, Jaybee said:

That resident has a story to tell now, too! My dad was a family doctor way back when, and delivered many, many babies. I don't know that I can get the details right in his resident story: He was attending a woman who I believe was having about her 10th or 12th child. She told him that her babies came fast and she only pushed once. Back then, like with my experience overseas, there was a labor room and a delivery room. The residents gave each other a hard time if their patient had the baby in the labor room rather than the delivery room, so Daddy was determined that wasn't going to happen to him. However, he was checking her when she had a massive contraction, and she pushed that baby right out, right then! It's good for the residents to have a humbling experience now and then.😂

Oh I love it!!! lol

I told dh, I bet I was the reply to everyone’s “so how did your day go” around the dinner table that night. lol

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Elizabeth86

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3 minutes ago, momto3innc said:

Not the same at all, but reminds me of my last one. She was a week late and ended up being induced. My first two were 2 and 3 weeks early so this was unusual for me.

I kept setting off the blood pressure alarms (too low) and then her heart rate started going down with contractions. Doctor came in and had me sign a consent for a c section. I was pretty  upset. He said if I wasn’t at 10 next time we checked, he was wheeling me back. He checked and said I was an 8. I remember being so upset that I would have a c section. Then I suddenly had this giant contraction, went to 10, and her head came out…all in about 20 seconds. I didn’t push at all and she came all the way out seconds later.

I remember my doctor pleading with me to wait since he hadn’t changed (and was wearing what must have been pretty expensive dress clothes/shoes that became quite messy). I couldn’t have stopped because I wasn’t even doing anything—it just happened.

All was well…it was just a wild ending. 
congratulations!!!

I love it!! We just REALLY didn’t want csections!!

 

 

 

 

 

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3 minutes ago, Dmmetler said:

Congratulations!!! (And you have a story to embarrass this little guy about when he's much older 🙂 )

Right? 😂 I’ve got plenty of white hair coming in, but after my pregnancy and labor and delivery, I expect all my hair may be white soon. He is such a precious baby and worth it all! He’s done put me through so much, he is not allowed to have rebellious teen years.

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Elizabeth86

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1 minute ago, Eos said:

I don't know, he might just be really laid back, an I-got-all-the-time-in-the-world kinda kiddo...

Whoever he will be, I don’t know. He certainly is so precious and so very loved and a perfect addition to our family. We are all having a blast being a family of 7. I’m so glad he’s here!

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Wow thats crazy. Reminds me of #2 i was induced just because He was late late late.   I was settled in for a nice long day we had movies we were watching Baby Mama they checked me at noon and I was like at 4cm.  They gave me pitocin and meds( I hate pitocin so i get them at the same time)  an hour later nurse comes in they lost babies heartbeat probably just knocked the censor loose. She lifts the sheet to check and their is a head.  She hits the  big button bringing everyone to the room. Baby is born about 2 minutes later.  My poor family doctor had spent all morning at hospital just to birth my baby and she missed it because some many people were racing to the room she couldnt get through.

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busymama7

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Congratulations!! That's a powerful story.  

I personally have gone from 2-4 cm to birth in less than 10 min at least 4 times and the only reason I don't know about the others is due to no vaginal exams so I don't know what my dilation was.   I don't know why nurses are so confident that babies aren't coming when mamas aren't 10 at a check.  I see it happen a lot although not in the way you describe especially with not first time mamas.  

 

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Elizabeth86

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23 minutes ago, Grace Hopper said:

Oh my goodness, that’s wild! You are a warrior woman!

Hope your little guy quickly learns to sleep well so you can, too. 

lol thanks. I don’t think any of my kids have ever slept through the night before age 2. However, I feel great post partum! So, feeling very blessed over here!

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Wow! What a wild birth.

It makes me wonder if my sister experienced that with her first. She was at a birthing house for 18ish hours after losing water but without progressing and the midwife was no longer comfortable so she went to the hospital. Her MIL showed up pacing and talking. She called me to come to run interference with MIL. Her next check said she had regressed, higher station, less dilation. She was devastated and sent everyone home. I left the hospital and made it only 6 miles down the road before she sent me a photo of the baby. Her MIL leaving and a drop of Pit was all it took. 

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Elizabeth86

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3 minutes ago, Brittany1116 said:

Wow! What a wild birth.

It makes me wonder if my sister experienced that with her first. She was at a birthing house for 18ish hours after losing water but without progressing and the midwife was no longer comfortable so she went to the hospital. Her MIL showed up pacing and talking. She called me to come to run interference with MIL. Her next check said she had regressed, higher station, less dilation. She was devastated and sent everyone home. I left the hospital and made it only 6 miles down the road before she sent me a photo of the baby. Her MIL leaving and a drop of Pit was all it took. 

I laugh because I can imagine a mil at your birth could do this for sure. What an interesting story.

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Elizabeth86

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21 minutes ago, busymama7 said:

Congratulations!! That's a powerful story.  

I personally have gone from 2-4 cm to birth in less than 10 min at least 4 times and the only reason I don't know about the others is due to no vaginal exams so I don't know what my dilation was.   I don't know why nurses are so confident that babies aren't coming when mamas aren't 10 at a check.  I see it happen a lot although not in the way you describe especially with not first time mamas.  

 

Right? Also, the confidence of the nurses was passed onto me. I was confident I was rupturing because I was confident you couldn’t push a baby out at 6. I had no idea *I* could dilate so quickly because all my births were quite slow.

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38 minutes ago, LMD said:

Wow, amazing! Thank you for sharing. I felt a real need to tell people my birth story to help process the whole experience. I hope you are doing okay, getting plenty of rest, enjoying not being pregnant! He's adorable 💙

Yes! I just had to share my birth stories and I love to hear others birth stories.

Edited by Elizabeth86
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Kassia

Kassia

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:

Right? My other 4 were 💯 uneventful. Thank you. I am very thankful it all turned out ok. I honestly still feel shaken up by it all.

 

4 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:

Yes, it was wild. I just keeping replaying over with my dh because I’m in awe of what the body can do.

It's so much to process.  And he is absolutely beautiful - thanks for sharing your birth story and the photos of your beautiful much-awaited baby!  ❤️ 

 

2 hours ago, LMD said:

 felt a real need to tell people my birth story to help process the whole experience. 

I think a lot (most) women feel this way - helps us sort it all out because it's such a huge thing physically and emotionally.  

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