SquirrellyMama Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 Before your spouse dies please make sure that both spouses know all about the finances. My father passed away on Tuesday. He paid all the bills, had loans in his name only that my mom didn't know about, etc... It is a mess! Kelly 2 21 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 (((Kelly))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 26 minutes ago, SquirrellyMama said: Before your spouse dies please make sure that both spouses know all about the finances. My father passed away on Tuesday. He paid all the bills, had loans in his name only that my mom didn't know about, etc... It is a mess! Kelly I am so sorry for your loss ((((Kelly)))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I'm so sorry for your loss. ((((hugs)))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyoffive Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 Great PSA. I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I am so sorry for your loss. I've actually had this on my mind because if I die, my husband is the one who will be clueless about our finances. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I'm so sorry - for all of it. The loss of your father compounded by sorting through a mess has to be very difficult for you and for your mom. 😞 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I am so sorry. In our family, I’m the bookkeeper. I have said many times to my kids and to dh, “this is the notebook you need if I die.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanin Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I'm very sorry about your father. 😞 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I am so sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 And safe deposit boxes, etc. My great-aunt only found out about it when she got the rent bill from the bank. He was much younger than her, and assumed he'd outlive her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 1 hour ago, SquirrellyMama said: Before your spouse dies please make sure that both spouses know all about the finances. My father passed away on Tuesday. He paid all the bills, had loans in his name only that my mom didn't know about, etc... It is a mess! Kelly I am so sorry for your loss! I am the family bookkeeper, but there aren't any secrets. When my FIL died, I had to sort a lot of stuff for my MIL. She had paid bills in the past (good!), but there were things she didn't want to know (bad), and my FIL had lost track of a few things when not feeling well. I ended up making her a bill-paying notebook with kind of a yearly overview and a monthly breakdown--it has pockets for all the bills to be paid, bank statements, etc. I think I also made a separate notebook with pockets for insurance policy paperwork and things like that--it was basically sheet protectors, but they had a sticker saying exactly what belonged in each slot, so if something had to be taken out, it was clear what went back into each slot so that things couldn't walk off without someone knowing. I think she liked it all right (she has a weird relationship with wanting to be told what to do but resenting it), but if you need ideas for something like that, I can describe roughly what I did. My SIL with ADHD really liked it, so I think it's quite streamlined. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I am very sorry for your loss. My FIL died a week before your father and it is the same situation for DH and his mom - she is clueless. He took his dad's file cabinet and brought it home to sort through everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 5 minutes ago, Bagels McGruffikin said: I’m so sorry, that’s hard. My SO pays everything and has all the accounts, so he uses a password vault and made sure I have the master info for it so I can get every log in and account access, precisely for this reason. We really love OnePassword. Is that the same as this? https://1password.com/ Thanks for the recommendation! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 I’m so sorry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 So so sorry for your loss😭 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 2 hours ago, SquirrellyMama said: Before your spouse dies please make sure that both spouses know all about the finances. My father passed away on Tuesday. He paid all the bills, had loans in his name only that my mom didn't know about, etc... It is a mess! Kelly I'm so sorry for your loss. hugs. One of my dearest friends is going through the same thing. Dad handled all the finances and took care of mom. They all thought she'd go first because her health was poor. But, he got pancreatic cancer and, thanks to COVID, did not go in until about 2 weeks before he died. And no one could visit him in the hospital. It's a mess and just so very sad too. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BusyMom5 Posted July 23, 2020 Share Posted July 23, 2020 So sorry for your loss. We have been here- it will be okay, just take time to sort all out- it was a mess. I just tell myself that in their time, it was normal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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